@@vaIe_ its not because they cannot "stop". Its because they will have to realize that they were living a lie. Look how young people present themselves in social media. All of them are "Superheros", rich, good looking, tolerant, progressiv, virtuous and so on. The truth however is, they are just as "human" as anyone else and all these representations are nothing more then illusions, created to impress others of ones own virtues. Nature has a very very cruel way of showing us reality through the aging process. Once we get over a certain age, most of us must realize that we were not as good as we thought and that we were living a lie. The more lies you build up to that moment, the harder it will come crashing down. There never has been a greater Lie in the history of mankind then "Social" Media. Its very own name is a Lie.
This is exactly where the idea of teaching people how to treat you comes into play. When I raised my daughter, there was so many conversations about and examples of you can be attractive but have boundaries too. The girls that get their worth solely from their appearance are willing to erode their boundaries and are usually the ones that eventually complain about being objectified.
I'm so grateful I live in a time when I could listen to such wonderful people just sitting there and discussing things I ask myself as a growing generation. I'm 22 and this felt like fresh air for me. I don't have a role model in that direction irl so it is very precious to me. Just show me that they're always another side even if you can't see much of an example around.
Right. You can't objectify yourself either. The counter argument might be that women can do whatever they want, but unfortunately to change a culture you cant have both sides I feel like
As a 20 year old woman, I teared up when she said "Can you imagine, right now being 20?" :,) It has come to a point where I accept that it may just be me, my plants, and some pets in this life
As someone who grew up without all this i can say that constantly being inundated with airbrushed images does make you feel a little down, even if you are otherwise confident. The best thing for women and girls is to avoid all those posts of surgical perfection. I have found that it just makes you appreciate your body and 'imperfections'. Finding someone that loves you as you are, without make up or injections etc is also super important. 🥰 I am thankful for meeting such man, our relationship feels like the most natural thing in the world because we are enough for eachother. I hope more people can find that sort of thing and just love themselves so they can allow someone else to love them too.
Tbf youtube can be fine depending what your watching and doing. I listened to this podcast while workouting out, and just figuring how to multitasking when. Ican
You dont need to control youtube...its just entertainment,its like watching tv but in this case you have the power to choose,its a powerful search and knowledge tool. Its like google with video,instagram cant make you much more smarter but youtube can.
@@chaitanyasharma6270 a healthy life takes time to build. Fill the emptiness of social media with spiritual food and taking a walk on your street and begin to say hi to your neighbors and the people around you.
@@chaitanyasharma6270 I am 17 and just replaced my iPhone with a flip phone. No more Instagram and Snapchat for me. I have been feeling the same way sometimes. Usually I just try to call a friend to hangout. Getting into this habit has made me realize that in-person social interactions are actually a lot more fulfilling than what we experience online.
I grew up in London and went to uni, so I was always wearing makeup, buying cheap crap clothes, and trying to keep up with trends. I moved to a small village in the french mountains where none of that exists - if you wear a face full of makeup, you're making way too much of an effort and you actually feel silly. Sports, nature, socialising (in person, not through a phone) and organic food are the important things here. I'm so glad I escaped the consumer environment that was taking my money and constantly making me think I wasn't good enough!
Great interview! Loved hearing her thoughts on smartphones and social media. I used to watch her play volleyball...no idea she was so smart and interesting. She is very impressive.
@@RebornLegacy Yeah that's not the point of what I was getting at. It's different to be sexually attracted to someone and treat them with respect (That's normal). Then someone flaunting all they have in a purposeful manner to the world, then switching stances given the response they receive.
As a soon to be father in his 20s this is something I have considered bc my generation got smartphones when we were teenagers. Undoubtedly when they first came out they were limited but eventually tons of apps were made and you had to test the waters to see what was nonsense and what was useful. Growing up many kids had social media and strived for likes and objectified themselves and I see the same people doing that now as grown ups. It's insane how social media took away people's ability to be content with the people in their school or just the peoe the actually care about being enough to make them content; women especially strive to be noticed by hundreds to thousands of people they don't and will never know. I understand it's an addiction but it's just a sad reality. I see my younger siblings and my wife's younger siblings becoming addicted to the same plague. I don't use Facebook, TikTok, or Twitter. I have Instagram but it's to follow family and friends and that's it I decided to only have 1 social media and I haven't posted since I was 19. Seeing how negatively this has affected so many people especially women makes me very concerned for my daughter when she is eventually older. There needs to be stronger limitations on media access for younger people, especially teenagers and kids. I don't plan to allow my kids to have phones until they are 16 and can drive because that makes sense; maybe a flip phone before then but regardless I will be monitoring my children and what they text and who they text because of how scandalous adolescents are today.
I’m glad we’ve gotten to a point where we talk about these things in a non judgemental and idealistic manner and instead come with an open mind and and try to understand the social norms of the new generation
Me too. I would have been so much more insecure. In real life, people just say a lot less toxic shit to you so you have the chance to develop your identity. Early social media was also a lot less unhealthy. I remember when we just had fun posting and looking at selfies because it was literally a novelty, not social currency. It was the first time we got to see so many photos from people we knew. Before, you had to meet up and view it on their home computer (didn't happen often). So it was really cool at first to see any sort of photo from your friends and classmates. Then by 2013-ish things started to get old as people did it longer. And now photos and statuses are used as validation and social currency instead of novelty. The feeling completely changed.
@@Subuzgreatest Lmao spoken like a true bronze ranked come back when you're at least gold! /s I swear I had this exchange while playing an FPS to chill, there are people who consider themselves superior because of their in-game rank. Sad af.
Gabby has so much credibility. She was the first woman to push back at the people who wanted to sell beach volleyball by objectifying the players by forcing them to wear tinier bikinis. Gabby chose to wear tights, and for the first time pointed out that you should watch the game for the sport, and not as porn. Thanks for being a bad ass.
@@ynotttt Many people think the quality of the competition is better on the women's side. I certainly think that's true in 4s and 6s. Some people enjoy the physical power of the men's game but after a while it's boring to me.
Thanks for pointing that out. All i see in every women sport nowadays is porn(dress in their panties). It is no longer sports. It is fascinating that those who call themselves Feminist love this and see nothing wrong with it.
@@MrTAA-cc7eu In many sports, the men who are on charge dictate what the official outfits need to look like. That included maximum coverage limitations. If men say you have to wear panties or you don't get to play, you wear panties.
I love Garbielle Reece !! She is spot on about this generation,she is a good looking girl who reached the top of her ambitions but didn’t have to do it showing her butt.She was a professional athlete and a model
She did a shoot in Playboy naked and posed for well over 5000 sexy photos of her in a bikini, And don't get me wrong there is absolutely nothing wrong with showing your butt and boobs for money, nothing wrong with it all, but she most certainly posed naked and half naked thousands of times.
Yeah I agree. It's not uncommon to hear about the dangers associated with Porn and Social medias but rarely is it about the addiction associated with both.
Yeah and all the stuff on it is fake. People post all these things making them seem happy. But when the camera isn't on them, they are a mess, and sad. Same with porn, it gives the wrong impression on what sex is. And its just terrible
Christianity does treat as such.. if one is truly following the path of Christ. For non-Christians maybe take a page from the book and learn to gain control of temptations that offer no fulfillment.
@@clarkstelter7010 Governments allow it. Right about parents,although many are not strong enough to bring their children up healthy anymore, not having got it themselves. Competing with today's temptations on children is hard.
As someone who is aware of these issues in beauty standards ill always go for the lady who hasnt plastered her face up with makeup. Not only on principle, but because i appreciate natural beauty and also theres a better chance she understands the issues surrounding this aswell.
I appreciate the sentiment, but a piece of friendly advice: you might have a better time phrasing that more like preferring a more natural look. For one thing, it expresses appreciation for the lady's own tastes and skill putting herself together, but for another thing. . . . The vast majority of the time, what guys are pointing at as "not made up" is a lady still very much wearing makeup. She just also appreciates a subtle, natural aesthetic and chooses to express herself that way.
I was watching this thinking “what is she talking about? She’s GORGEOUS” ...But I had no idea she was 50!! I tip my hat to you, madam. I hope I look half as good as you when I’m 50
I myself struggled with body image issues as a result of social media. It seemed no matter how much skin I showed or how many filters I used or how many of my curves I showed off I just didn't get as much of the attention and likes that the pretty girls I knew got. Finally, after years of not feeling as pretty as the girls I knew, I took one hard look at myself and realized something very profound. I am a man.
as a parent with a daughter and a son, i think setting an example goes a long way. i'm not saying it's going to solve all the problems. however, if your kids see you on instagram all the time, posing, dressing up for these posts, dressing in certain ways, that's the example they will follow.
This woman is literally a retired pro beach volleyball player. Imagine being a hall of fame caliber athlete, while simultaneously playing the sport that so many people watch for the ass, and having the ability to completely disregard the stereotypes associated with your sport because you're just that intelligent
I quit social media a few years ago when I realized what a toxic pissing contest it is. 90% of it is posturing and I have 0 desire to compete for fake internet points.
erick alvarez not the person who posted the comment but I also quit social media maybe a year ago and it is wonderfulllllll. Less comparing in all facets of my life has made me happier and realize I really do have it good!
@@O_Canada Everyone is getting older. Doesn't change the fact that she's right. Thing is, the older you get the more you start to recognise toxic behaviour for what it is.
I think how we grew up without phones and having strong social interactions is a very powerful and useful tool, but we need to accept new technologies and use them because that is how our population is progressing. We need to use it in moderation and still practice normal simple interactions. These poor kids can’t get away from everything that upsets or puts them in a bad headspace because it will be active on Facebook or other social media platforms. It’s nice to take a break.
It shows that social media is the worse thing ever created I work in a pub and the amount of friends and couples who come out to eat but all they do is sit on there phones on social saying nothing to eachother what is the bloody point even coming out and it's only going to get worse
Yes but if you look around today, you’ll see that most people can’t be bothered by eating right or exercising. It’s actually rare for me to see a woman in good shape.
I don't think they give more or volunteer more unless it gets them a "GOLD STAR" for participation and the whole world see's it on Instagram and every one cheers for them for being so humble and awesome.
I think it's less about that, more about the fact that educational inflation forces people to volunteer so that they can have some kind of experience needed to get into their program or job. This thing didn't exist in the last generation.
@@antoniettamancinelli6581 it tells you the meaning of life. Then you wake up and forget the answer. If you do remember you contend with your sanity for the rest of your life.
I’m 36 with a flip phone still. I actually went to T mobile to get a new one recently. The guy didn’t even know they still made flip phones and he said no one not even granny’s or kids get this anymore!! I still felt very pleased with my decision.
She dropped an interesting point right there: We are living in a moment where #MeToo "Treat me equally" is out there simulteanously with the constant Instagram objectification reward.
I’m turning 19 on Thursday. I realized what social media was doing to me so I deleted Instagram. Snapchat’s next but youtube is gold. I’ve learned so much from the content on here.
The amount of time on social media is what some consider the most damaging, not the app itself. RU-vid and Netflix prob do as much damage as Instagram or Snapchat, time wise.
@@rand0mletters1 The amount of time is what's damaging, because its an indicator of an addiction. If you browse Instagram for 5 minutes everyday as opposed to an 1-5 hours daily, you'll probably be less susceptible to the damage of it. Social media itself is not inherently detrimental because it provides an experiential service.
@@3Demon100 eh. I think it's damaging beyond that because it's a subversion of the basic social need that women have which drives them in most interactions. Men for instance at a base are sexually driven, or as Chapelle puts it "Men have nice cars not cause they like nice cars, but because women like nice cars." As a secondary force Men enjoy affirmation, bonding etc. It's easy enough to see how porn might subvert this basic driving force. Women on the other hand are in essence flipped. Their main driving societal force is a need for: affirmation, attention and provision. In the last 60 or so years the provision aspect has been moved from the shoulders of men, to women's own shoulders. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, women can provide for themselves. However only in about the last ten years has affirmation and attention been subverted by social media. I don't think I need to explain how social media has provided those two things for women. As a secondary drive, women are sexual. The subversion of these things I think has lead to higher female and male depression. See: incels. Lower drive to both males and females. Additionally the moral exodus of western women. (The good v bad aspect of the new morality is a debate for another time). So while yes an addiction to anything is an issue. Both the use of porn to fill a sexual motivating drive in men, and the use of social media to fill an affirmation/attention social motivating drive in women, can be harmful even when not addicting.
These two are batting aroundthe concepts of 'success' and what I woudl call 'fulfillment.' They both speak and define 'success,' but they skirt around the concept of 'fulfillment.' Fulfillment is the really good feeling you get when/as you help others. Helping others, uplifting, inspiring others, is quite fulfilling and the feeling lasts throughout your life. But it has NOTHING to do with objectifying your body.
Awesome interview!! We need more discussions like these. American society has controlled our youth. Young people unfortunately are being influenced day in and day out by the media and the internet. This is a collective problem we are all to blame because most of us follow like sheep thinking it's normal.
"How do I teach my kids about the long game." Damn that's definitely a hard one. I was always a weird kid, maybe it was depression but positive reactions didn't do anything for me or give me thrills. So I have always thought in terms of the long game, when I was in middle school I was waiting to be 18. Even in my late 20s I don't regret it and enjoy adult freedom.
the topic at the end about doing what you love is so good. i think the right way is to create yourself space to try something youve always wanted to do in a way that if it fails or it isnt as great as you thought, it wont do you in: financially, socially, carreerwise. I would say im in the process of that. It can be done reasonably and with nice results that do open new avenues.
"How do you get a 13 year old to talk about the long game?" The eternal question. How do you make teenagers appreciate the value of the next 60-80 years of their life? Responsibility and moderation is super important. Teach kids how to deal with stress, how to build self-esteem, how to moderate themselves. A teenager's capacity for self destruction is much greater than it used to be.
To me, this is where religion would come in. Sure everyone's trying to run away from it and people think it's stupid, but the core ideas were always be good to yourself and do good to others, resist temptations, and do the right thing are all life lessons that children *need* to hear, lessons that were once learned from their religion. The problem is, you can just tell this to your child, and they could quickly dismiss it as "dumb parents" but saying something like "The road to Hell is a super highway, while the road to heaven is a steep mountain path" always seemed to be more persuasive.
@@joumero7493 If their parents who are standing right in front of them can't convince them then how is god or hell going to convince them? Ruling through fear is a dangerous proposition.
But when it's all they see. Especially when you have snapchat and instagram curating what each user sees based on their previous views. So they are only exposed through this superficial facade. They don't know any better other than living vicariously through, what they believe is a satisfactory or "perfect" life.
4 года назад
Highlights at best, sometimes it's just plain lies.
My daughter and son, now 23 & 24, didn’t have cell phones until they could afford them on their own (at about 18). Old fashioned yes but appears to have worked.
Right. We constantly hear about unrealistic body standards for women then we have these jacked drug filled guys walking around as our standard. With women drooling over them. Same thing
For real, some younger people don’t understand that when you’re looking at social media they’re only presenting the highlights of their life and their qualities. Never any shortcomings so they feel incredibly inferior by comparison. It’s so fucked up
So, basically she is saying that women should not play the card of showing off their body as a career because it cannot be a life time job. However, she herself is a perfect example of this card playing out quite well as she showed off her body in Playboy magazine and today she can afford a decent lifestyle. So, IMO she's hypocritical in her statement.
your right. I don't want little kids having social media accounts, I personaly see it as damaging and making the kids growing up way too fast, they are not allowed to be silly kids cuz the internet will only call them "cringy". you can give ur kid an old AF nokia phone or whatever but if you give them a high end smartphone then social media will be unaviodable. I remember even back in 2006 when we turned 12 there was like a switch in our brain where everyone all of a sudden started acting more grownup and "cool"(aka peer-pressure) just because we where one year away from highschool. And I bet that number is even lower now. Probably 9 year olds are like OMG Lisa your clothes are so out of fashion... Like c'mon being a kid sucks when you feel peerpressured to grow up. Atleast my authistic ass gave me a longer childhood then others. When others started smoking and drinking at 12-13 I was still a playful kid up until 16.
I’m 21 and I’ve always preferred women who wear significantly less makeup or wear it less often. Literally half of the girls my age look like they’re made of porcelain and it’s terrifying.
She's like my mom. I didn't always immediately take her advice, but it sunk in eventually. And my mom was smart and patient enough to know that's how it works.
That's how it has to work in good parent - child relationship. If you forced yourself to take her advice always even against your will, you would lose all sense of identity and legitimacy. You would soon start questioning every aspect of your identity, suspecting that you're completely irrelevant and incompetent because you have to be constantly life coached by someone else (it doesn't matter who) for the rest of your life because no matter what you do, someone else always knows better what's best for you. That would be destructive.
@@damasek219 this comment struck hard on me, grew up exactly like this and it's hard to find a solid ground of your identity if you don't do something about it before you reach adulthood.
@@topzki47 I had these moments too. But I didn't want to say it is bad to listen to the parents. On the contrary. I wish I listened more to them. But just to make up for the less obedient kids, those do make more mistakes, but as a rehabilitation, they often end up appreciating their parents more, because they find out their parents were right in the first place. Kids that do listen, won't need to find out and have easier life but they often don't appreciate how wise their parents were. But it is better to always consider the advice of the parents if it doesn't go against your determination. What would be wrong is to be life coached in all aspects of your life.
THIS is the kind of women young girls SHOULD be looking up too. I love Gabrielle Reece and had her picture up on my wall. People should listen to her other interviews... Truly a intelligent, hard working and moral individual.
I unplugged from Facebook a couple years ago. I spent ten years being so attached to the best and worst snapshots of other people's lives, and it set me up with unrealistic expectations of what my life should be. I couldn't reckon with how much less popular I was compared to others. 7 likes on a picture or post was a big deal to me at the time. My self-worth was so tied into something so worthless, at a time when my conscientiousness was highest. I feel like I wasted my best years, years I could have spent mastering something of real value to other people. The worst part, I can't blame anyone but myself, and I truly believe that, because it gives me the power to change things for the better, but it still hurts.
When Joe said “thirteen year olds don’t hear you (or understand what you’re saying) until later” I got that. Because he’s right, teenagers don’t do what you are telling them to do until they see the downside/consequence
That's the difference between Wisdom and intelligence. A wise man was once an ignorant child and learned through experience. An intelligent person listens to Wisdom and learns without the consequences.
"It's great that you have a nice butt... but there's a lot of nice butts" sums it up well. Just tell your daughters this and that they need to be strong as well as beautiful. Job done.
Yeah I'm not really sure what to make of that. Being popular snd having supportive friends makes life better. No duh. What about those who struggle to make friends snd sre always alone? Are they just screwed then?
@@KFrost-fx7dt of course not, theres many ways to be a great parent who raises healthy kids. I do think positive friendships are a good thing to strive for though. Doesn’t have to be a lot of friends even just 1 can be a positive impact on you and your children
@Victor Smith A mistake many (most?) parents make is praising their children far more for their attributes than for their efforts. It creates laziness and entitlement.
Drew got jokes If you are interested in tips on growing your Instagram page without fake likes or followers, check out my friend’s awesome channel! ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-e5UELm76BbU.html
They don’t need a phone or computer until high school. If there is a genuine need for communication give them a flip phone with the ability to take pictures in the event of emergencies.
@@deltbrah16 unfortunately I agree with you. I thought what the guest said about a group of 10+ parents agreeing to hold off on smart phones together so one person isn’t left out is quite clever. Maybe it could work.
Gabby is brilliant and should have a much louder voice for women. She's clearly had a full life of experience and is modest and powerful at the same time.
Absolutely. Such real dignity and strength by her values, maturity, and way she talks. So attractive compared to Only Fans "empowered sex workers" and tiktok/insta thots
Same here. It's taken a revectoring on my part to come even remotely close to what I'd consider to be a good social life. I'm glad it happened - I found Scripture and my own Path, but damn it would be nice if I just socialize with people that actually know how to be human beings sometimes.
i'm 37 people were socially awkward long before social media, it's a just a convenient excuse nowadays when before you were just considered to be a dork with a shit personality
how is that for the measure of a good dad, "my daughter is the only kid in her class without her own phone", complete respect. I plan to do the same one day
From the ages of 21 to 41, I pretty much dated women around 22/model-ish... I realized I was only living for myself and got married. My wife's now pretty old and chubby...and I think she's the hottest woman I've ever know/love her/4 kids... women need to understand that who you are is WAY more important than the surface stuff...hard to explain.
I have always admired Gabrielle and I completely agree with her. Now with gaming you can connect with others online live. The interaction takes away from having outside real relationships with people. Roblox ( the people creating the games and the people you are connecting with) really push being trans, bi- sexual, being gay, etc....they make it seem to grand. And it is only confusing kids. This has been my experience with my kids. Kids are growing up so much faster with the internet, and it is not good. And social media and everyone's life is great ( but not really it's a fake reality) and everything is so sexualized. It is a hard world to grow up in and now throw in COVID.. its scary. Watch Fake Famous, a documentary on 3 people and the different reactions to how they handle fame on social media. 🇺🇲✌🏼❤️🙏🏻
Also, when they keep snapping away with the stupid non-stop photo-taking for uploads, and when you tell them that NO, you cannot take a picture of me, they get offended. WTF?? You do NOT have the right to my face and image!!
@Kry Kry Ooohhhh please you actually are gonna sit here and tell me these girls are making bank like that lol I dont think so . One of those so called former models exposed them . Trust me there not making money like that
@@Shawn-zt3gv not all of them. the most attractive women are often the least confident people, at least in my experience. especially when their looks begin to fade, which they inevitably will. basing your confidence on a thing as fleeting as your appearance is bound to end with regret
@cory Her typo doesn't make her any less smart. Furthermore, spelling abilities are completely unrelated to intelligence. Joe actually talk to an expert about this very thing in another podcast.
She comes on and talks about strong women and standing up for oneself and having respect - Joe segues it into talking about Milf Porn.... classic Rogan
I am so happy that my son missed the phone frenzy. When he went to university, he had a phone but was not staring at it all day long. He was into sports and interacting with humans, living, breathing humans. I bet there are on line robots creating relationships. Robots are better for online relationships because they don't screw up because of emotions. Podcasts are great but go out after watching one and shoot some hoops in the school yard until you are tired.
Like she said, this is one of the most modern eras for women. That being said, many females had very submissive mothers that weren't allowed opinions or a voice at home. How would they have been able to teach their daughters confidence and self worth? She mentioned that the girls that have strong/confident women in their lives growing up, will have an example of that. Not all girls had this growing up thus leading to the stigma that their partner is worthy and as a female all they have to offer are physical traits....
That "put my foot on the gas" quote actually resonated for some reason. Going fast in a new car is exhilarating right but obviously can be dangerous, makes a lot of sense actually. Good analogy.
"You are pretty girls,it's great, but if that's the card you are playing , your card is done by the time you are 30 or 35". "Stand up for yourself, be strong" I really loved thess ones.
To clear the air: she is not saying that you won't be pretty in your 40s, my mom is 52 and I am always thinking: god how can she be so much prettier than me. She just said that you don't play or live only with what you are born with. You gotta do something else, like don't make being pretty a part of your identity because it will not be forever too, do something that lasts forever, for you at least. I hope we all form some kind of identity that will benefit us later in life.
coming from the internet age, I made it out fine and I dont see the issue. I was there with AOL 3.0 1000 free hours discs and all. I've been surfing the web since 95 when I was in the 5th grade. Parenting is the issue. "Parents" are more apt to stick a cell phone in their kids hands and walk away than be a parent. Kids are more apt to jump onto CoD 20 and play with their friends than go outside, pick up a ball and play with that same friend (pandemic being the only excuse). Technology isnt the issue, its just a convenient scape goat to shit parents that were kids in the internet age and are now adults with kids.
@@ICU1337 I did well in some places and bad in others. Started watching cursing, gaming RU-vidrs at like 12, and it was fine in the end because I simply don't curse. But I started watching more risque videos and then one day I said screw it and went to a porn site, and it led me down a dark path. Luckily I found Jesus and new friends, started college, and I'm happy now.
@@sirkikesteinshekelberg9091 lmfao you have no idea what you’re talking about. The deep web is 95%+ of the internet. You aren’t cool for using what almost literally everyone uses.
