Long-Distance Relationships - The BRUTAL Truth About How to Make Them Work (Matthew Hussey)

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For a long time I thought it was crazy how many women asked me to talk about this topic.
But now, I realize the reason is obvious: In 2017, more of us are doing long-distance relationships than ever.
You meet a great guy on Instagram who doesn’t live in the same country...
You start dating the perfect man in your city, only to find out he’s been offered a new job 1000 miles away…
And suddenly, you find yourself having “Skype dates”, and you now spend half your work day sending silly photos to each other on Whatsapp.
You feel like you’re falling in love with this guy - but can it actually work long term??
Should you follow your heart and go for it, or should you listen to your head and call it quits? What’s the answer?
These are big questions, so I decided this it was time to be super honest about long-distance and my thoughts on it.
Here’s what you really need to know...
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3 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 1 тыс.

@misstarshiny1 7 лет назад

I agree with what the guy on the video said, a long distance relationship works only if the two of them are on the same page and work towards being geographically together in the future. There needs to be an end goal otherwise it's a waste of time.

@terriesmith8219 6 лет назад

@stars Agreed 💯💯💯

@chloeanastasia8440 6 лет назад

waste of time dammit

@Bohemianbella1 6 лет назад

Yes and not one person expecting the plan while the other does what he wants with who he wants.

@vania7462 4 года назад

@Ar Chel I hope you'll find someone better than her 🙏🏻😁

@saymatattooremovalchannel9264 4 года назад

Ar Chel Thats so much investment U put in, hope u find someone better for u

@3hpleft 7 лет назад

LDR are very hard but can be worth it. My parents entered a LDR after a year of dating for 2 years. They sent a letter to each other every single day for 2 years. My dad still keeps all the letters my mom sent him in those 2 years in a box in their closet. They have been happily married for 30 or so years. If they could do it before skype , texting , snap chat and all the ways we have created to keep in touch with each other can too. I hope my parents story can give hope to those in LDR who are really trying to make it work.

@pernillenakskovpetersen4591 7 лет назад

Caroline Decker Thats so sweet! Thanks for sharing :)

@kimberlym2758 7 лет назад

Caroline Decker A letter is so special and meaningful. Thank you for sharing.

@rokmk2777 7 лет назад

Caroline Decker That's sooo romantic

@3hpleft 7 лет назад

Yeah my Dad is quite the romanitc.

@Mimikh909 6 лет назад

It’s easier for your parent generation to keep it, no phone no social media no anything

@nattalovely 7 лет назад

Just broke up with someone who I thought was the love of my life. We were in a long distance relationship for 8 months but we were involved long before that. It was the hardest thing in my life to accept the fact that this wouldn't be long term. He had way different priorities than I and it wouldn't be sustainable with me carrying the relationship on my back. To all the women (and men) out there in a similar situation. I promise it's better to be alone than with someone who makes you FEEL alone.

@royadair5078 5 лет назад

Very honest and truthful post ... I agree with you. especially about people's priorities.

@hudau.9859 5 лет назад

I’m dealing the exact same situation and now I know what I should do :)

@sunshinedayz7032 5 лет назад

I agree! I was in a relationship with a guy that did actually live in my town. But he might as well have just lived 2 hours away!! He would see me 2 or 3 times a month for a "date" (where he would proceed to look at every other woman in the vicinity!!) Man, I am glad I broke up with him! lol. We would see each other a few minutes at other times during the month (a VERY few minutes and very few times, plus he was always upset about something (and it was a big drain and stressful) I felt very alone. We are better off alone and happy than in an unsatisfactory relationship with someone who will not put in the effort.

@alicegoldenvalley 5 лет назад

Nathalie Alma Thank you for this. I feel like a horrible person for breaking up. But I can’t live from holiday to holiday. I just want to build a real life. I have generalized anxiety disorder & a panic disorder and I said from the start that long distance is not for me. He is going through something really hard right now so I tried to hang in there. But the level of anxiety of trying to be in a relationship with someone who isn’t really willing to work on a realistic plan that could work out for both of us just makes me think he isn’t really ready. And I am just not capable of being in a long distance relationship. The anxiety that I am going through is making me physically ill and mentally drained. I lost 2 kilos in one week (which is rare for me), I constantly feel like I’m going to throw up and I don’t eat, I don’t sleep. Anxiety/panic disorders do not go well with long distance relationships , not for me at least. And he knows about my anxiety & about the fact that I don’t want long distance, but he just keeps saying: “I want to be with you.” But there’s no plan and he has other obligations right now that are really understandable circumstances ( his mom passed away), so I do want to be there for him, but I’m mentally drained because of my own anxiety. I feel so selfish for breaking up, but I’m just spiraling in anxiety Day in, day out. I was going to break up with him after one month of dating (of which 2 weeks were long distance), because I just knew: okey this long distance thing is not going to work for me. And then his mom passed away and then I felt like I needed to stay for him to support him and be there for him. There’s also an ex-girlfriend lingering in the background and this was also an issue. Tbh my mind is just overwhelmed and I tried to put him first, due to the obvious very very sad event of his moms passing. I told myself he and his needs are more important than me and my needs right now. It’s 18 days after her passing and I am just drained from my anxiety and depression that follows my anxiety. I can’t do it anymore. I don’t want to live from holiday to Skype conversation. The timing sucks and makes me feel like a monster for breaking up with him. I really like him, but I can just tell that it’s not going to move forward. Because he’s fine with not seeing each other even for two years. He rather not see me for two years than live with me because it’s too soon for him. I agree that living together would be too soon. But living in different countries is just not going to work for me. I tried everything to move to his city, but it’s very hard to find anything (job with housing). If I had the money, I would be there already but I don’t. And I am doing everything on my own because he’s having to deal with his moms passing of course. I offered him time and space, he said he didn’t want that. Now in a recent argument where I said that I am tired of trying on my own because it’s just not working, he said that it’s normal that he want time and space with his family. I am just drained from the stress and my anxiety you all. A relationship is not supposed to feel like this. Even is hard times. The relationship is just up in the air, nothing solid and he just expects me to stay. I can’t do this. If that makes me a horrible and weak person so be it. My anxiety has been there for years before I met him and it means that I cannot do everything in life. One of those things is long distance relationships. But he doesn’t seem to understand that 😔 and then he says: what is so wrong with me that you want to break up with me? 💔 😱 someone help me. I love him but I cannot mentally die for him and let myself slip back into a depression that I just started getting out of after 20 years of depression. And also the constant state of anxiety, I just can’t handle it anymore.

@rizzamaeong 5 лет назад

@@alicegoldenvalley give him a deadline to come see you. if he's committed, he'll step up.

@clover5923 7 лет назад

A long distance relationship is a PROMISE, not a relationship. You promise to be in a relationship in real life. You promise to work it out and end the distance. You promise to have a future with the person. It's all promises, and it can be broken so easily. When you think about ldr, you literally have to say, "this will not and should not be permanent." If you truly like/love someone, ldr is temporary. It has to end somehow.

@lijian8903 7 лет назад

Panda Eyes 👏👏👏

@figzy1592 7 лет назад

Panda Eyes brilliantly said !!

@BrightStar717 7 лет назад

Panda Eyes i disagree, to an extent. It IS a relationship. A real, true, relationship. Should you aim to be together in person? In most cases, yes... The only thing you are missing out on is physical touch in long distance relationship, and you can have an extremely healthy, happy relationship without that, in my opinion. Religious people do it all the time. :) Being together in person definitely adds to the relationship in a positive way but ultimately, a long distance RELATIONSHIP is just that. A relationship over a distance.

@NutellaNeko 7 лет назад

!!!! this

@MatthewCoast 7 лет назад

Interesting perspective!

@Olmessi 7 лет назад

I am in a long distance relationship yeah my boyfriend lives in the future ...how about that lol #IamOut

@AB-ur9rq 6 лет назад

O_miss_T 😂😂😂😂

@Snowball-qr6xx 5 лет назад

So like you live in Mexico and he in the usa

@Raven_2912 5 лет назад

😂😂👌

@aikoyu9815 5 лет назад

😂👍

@tokunevicius26 5 лет назад

That was a good one 😅

@cbatt99 6 лет назад

My husband and I were in a 4 year LDR before we married. It was hard but we survived. Most relationships fail- so you can’t generalize that a LDR is bad because many of them fail. It wasn’t till we were married and saw other couples that we realized how much stronger being apart had made us. Communication skills are the only thing that keeps a LDR working.... and surprise surprise- it helps when your married too! LDR are not easy, but like a lot of hard things, they can be very rewarding.

@OneWhoReads 7 лет назад

I seriously think long distance really is all about the dedication of two people towards each other. It's not about how much time we spend with one another it's the time we give someone to make them feel that they have someone there for them.

@maalegc 6 лет назад

Am I the only one who doesn't have to much problem with LDR? I kind a like it. I have enough time to concentrate on study, college and work. Of course we talk everyday, have videocalls regularly. Is not perfect but is not that bad either

@ahlambeyoud1709 6 лет назад

it is good when you are a student that's true, but be careful when you are done studying and you will want an irl relationship mine was good when I was a student but then when I finished my studies it just ended because it was going nowhere, and as he said you should have a plan but be careful honey, I had a plan with him but you know when the whole relationship is based on talk that plan can be as well just talk, and talk is cheap but time is very valuable, I really wish yours end up happily, but just be careful, and I am telling you this because I wish someone had told me this, I missed so much opportunities on being in a real life relationship with amazing guys just because I was in ldr that didnt end up as we planed, ponder this over honey and best of luck, and I wish you all the happiness in you life.

@maalegc 6 лет назад

Jule Sparkle so thank you, yes we already talked about it and if things goes right I moving with him when I finished. We will see each other lindo of once a month and half so I’m optimistic. Like you said I hope everything go well, time is gold :)

@lyndandiba4345 6 лет назад

Maria Alejandra Calderón ikr! Not that bad, also gives me more time to miss each other.

@kathleencarn1609 4 года назад

@@ahlambeyoud1709 re

@nihalhathaway4089 4 года назад

I see your point, but in my case this is not too much the case. I like going out with my boyfriend and meeting friends with him, but now I would be talking with him on the phone, and THEN go and meet friends in my city, so actually I have less time.

@candracarter2640 7 лет назад

"Can't have him? We'll see about that" I freaking died.

@riverdeep399 5 лет назад

Candra Carter lightened the mood a treat! :)

@ابنةعلاءالدين 5 лет назад

+1 😂

@2Bonita08 7 лет назад

A bit of advice about this topic: long distance relationships can leave us spiritually and emotionally stinted as they are only partial relation-ships. To really get to know someone requires close ties, working through issues, seeing how our beloved treats others, communication even when things are difficult, developing trust by seeing they won't take off when things get tough, developing shared interests, among many other elements. If we exist in a bubble of wishing they were here (and they aren't) sets up longing and unfulfilled desires which will undermine us in that relationship, and even carry over to the next one. If it is not a temporary situation, be careful how long this continues, I would say.

@taraking87 5 лет назад

I met my husband 10 years ago. He was in the Navy and deployed to Australia to work with our Army. We reconnected through social media a year and a half ago, and did long distance for 6 months until I could visit him in the US. We’re lucky I’m a dual citizen and after a few months of selling and packing my life up, now we’re together and couldn’t be happier!! It can work as long as you have a clear plan, communicate well and commit to your relationship.

@rachelle97266 5 лет назад

Tara King good for you I’m also in a military LDR and he is currently deployed. It’s been hard but we’re both committed to each other and open and honest about our feelings. We’ve been together a year now and I don’t see anyone else I’d rather spend my life with and him with me.

@camilamorais7949 7 лет назад

Many people saying that long distance relationships allow us to know one's soul more deeply. It's definitely not like that. I truly believe that it doesn't matter how much time you're in a relationship with someone, you don't know them as deeply as you would if you were actually nearby. We have characteristics that people can only see when they're with us daily, during the good, bad and boring moments of our days. I've been in a LDR for a year and, whenever I meet my boyfriend during my trips, I discover something (and not always pleasant) about him. It doesn't mean he's fake or that he hides his flaws, but just that, as I said, there're many things we can only see when we're with our partner.

@Emilyspeace 7 лет назад

I'm currently in a long distance relationship, and have been since December 2013. It takes so much trust, patience, and understanding. We have met 4 times, the most recent meeting ending just 2.5 weeks ago. Being together felt like a dream. However, we have no idea when we will close the distance, as our situation is very complicated even though he is willing to move to be with me. In the meantime, we Skype hours every single day, and do our best to keep out spirits up even when we're missing each other. Just thought I'd share my experience. Here's to LDR couples staying strong.

@bonndell 7 лет назад

hypergiggles14 that is amazing! wish u guys luck and sending you all the positive energy!! keep on loving each other 💕

@Emilyspeace 7 лет назад

+ Bonn Dell aww thank you so much! :)

@james10011978 7 лет назад

hypergiggles14 blessing to you I understand what you going through

@beclarefull 6 лет назад

hypergiggles14 keep on going Em! cheers

@kenji4861 6 лет назад

Any plans on moving together in the future? Good luck.

@rethadh4615 7 лет назад

I wish I watched this video earlier... I spent 5 years to be with someone far away, it finally ended 2 years ago... it was really sad... I finally realized that if someone wants to be with u, they will make the effort...

@xlx077 7 лет назад

6 years and in the end I realized I fell in love with what I thought we were, not actually what was truth. You do miss out a lot, unfortunately you never get to know their real self unless you see them in real life and interact with them. That taught me the reality that I wasn't happy with him, as much I as I loved him, he wasn't for me as I panned out in my mind about him.

@truskakwa 7 лет назад

So this maybe will help someone. After almost 3 years of long-distance, my fiance broke up with me, we were getting married in February. Now, I do not understand the real reasons, but I never got to travel 11 000 km to find out. My heart is shattered to pieces, and it's been almost three months. This is kind of why I got to this channel, to seek advice, but may I give you one. If he is not willing to see you through these extraordinary circumstances and make effort to make you a priority, he isn't worth it. I almost worshipped him, yes, I still love, love isn't something that ends after a breakup. But, it hurts so much and I know, women leave everything for men more ofthen. Guard your hearts guys.

@28051995 7 лет назад

J K It's heartbreaking to hear your story :(. I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you guys. I hope you will come out of this situation stronger than ever before :). Stay positive!!

@PetitHibou72 6 лет назад

Yes, with self-knowledge from this in the future you can be protected. Wishing you swift heart-healing, and I’m so sorry for your experience. I just had to separate from someone who was assuming I’d move to be with him, when I’m the one with aging family nearby. I never looked for this situation, and now I remember - oh yeah! I don’t have to do this again! Hard to let go but it was the best thing. If he wants to be near, he can uproot *his* life. As women we’re often so accommodating, it can sneak up on us. I completely get it! Hugs...

@Bohemianbella1 6 лет назад

Same here 😕 but he left me for someone else and he keeps claiming how we both agreed to move on which is false, I had no choice while he was falling for his coworkers. A guy who isn’t committed to you or has no respect for you isn’t worth the distance. I’m sorry this happened to you. I know how bad it feels.

@fromanotherworld64 6 лет назад

Amazing words, I'm in a long distance relationship for 1 year and he is really younger than me, and we had to broke up 3 days ago, it's the begining of the hell world for me, I'm dying slowly

@susikristianti8630 6 лет назад

I feel you. But remember it, someone new come to take again. Ganbatte :)

@loripotkay 2 года назад

I was in a long distance relationship for 2 years… then I moved when we bought a house together 🙂❤️ we have been together 8 years together 6 of them living together.

@roxanneruiz9261 7 лет назад

Just because your partner is not present with you, it doesn't mean that you can be out partying or flirting with someone else knowing you are already committed to the person you are with. Whether he, she ,etc lives a thousand miles away. As for the intimacy part, well when you are in a ldr you get to connect with the person more emotionally than physically, whilst getting to know the person a whole lot better. And isn't that the most important part? To communicate? I am in a long distance relationship for five years and still going strong. In order for it to work out both of the parties need to be on the same page, the same understandment. Know it will take a lot of time, patience, dedication, and sacrifice and if you are not cut of with it, then the relationship will flounder.

@Avareee. 7 лет назад

Roxanne Ruiz 👍

@stefanyzambrano7325 7 лет назад

May I ask why you guys have waited 5 years?? Do you guys have a plan??

@alondragonz2009 6 лет назад

You can be committed and still go out partying and have freedom. By no means does a commitment mean being chained down and loosing your individual identity. What is needed though for a ldr to work successfully, besides commitment to each other, is mutual trust and respect for one another. Both have to be completely trusting on the other that neither one of you will cheat. And be able to respect your partners position and significance in your life. If one of you can’t fully commit to that idea/action then that person is not worth your time. If you can’t fully trust them, and you have to be stalking him, calling , texting, and asking where he is, I don’t think that reflects any sort of healthy relationship, let alone trying to make that work from a distance.

@anushree1737 3 года назад

I hope good blesses you both and you both get married soon ❤️❤️💐

@roxanneruiz9261 2 года назад

@tahoe twilight what does mental illness has to do with believing in someone? And no we didn't meet in person but we meet on Skype everyday. He introduced me to his family and friends. We had plans meeting in person we saved. So next time when you have know before you talk your shit.

@emoreland 7 лет назад

I like Jonathan's comment. That's what it all boils down to-is one willing to move to where the other one lives. I met my now husband while in the military while stationed overseas in Japan. He was from Massachusetts and I was originally from Ohio. Before he ever proposed to me, we talked about where we would settle down and live and raise a family. I would have liked to have moved back to Ohio, but my husband had a dream of going back to the Boston area and practicing law. Not only that, but his bar license was from Massachusetts and he wouldn't be able to get reciprocity in any other state without taking the bar exam again. I agreed to move to Massachusetts with him and my mom was so broken hearted because I didn't move back to Ohio. She described it to people that it seemed like she "lost" me, as if I were dead. She resented me for it. She passed away a couple of years ago. I wasn't there when she was sick, but I was there with her for her final days. I feel guilty that I wasn't there more for her, but I had my own life in Massachusetts with raising kids and a full time job. It's definitely something to think about. Yeah, I missed my family. My mom had 7 siblings, and only 2 of them are left. My dad had 3 siblings and only 2 of them are left. He passed away when I was 15. It's been hard hearing about your aunts and uncles slowly all dying away. I haven't lived in Ohio for 26 years, but I go back to visit often. But what do you do when someone you have fallen in love with has a goal of being a lawyer at a firm in Boston which is far away from where your family is in Ohio. It's like I had to choose my husband over my family. A day hardly goes by without me thinking about how much my mom would call me and tell me how much she missed me and wished that I would move back to Ohio. I have been happily married for 19 years and I don't regret the decision I made, but everyday, I have this guilty feeling lurking over me. I've learned that you have to go where life takes you.

@rachelle97266 5 лет назад

Eva Volkin my SO is also military and has been deployed overseas for the last year. It’s hard being in a LDR but I also know he is the one I am meant to spend my life with. Even though the physical intimacy isn’t there right now doesn’t mean it won’t be. It just means that all other aspects of our relationship have grown and matured over this last year. There needs to be trust on both sides to make it work and we both have talked about the future and where we see our relationship going. He feels as strongly for me as I do for him so after we do the dating/ courting part when he gets back I believe there may be a proposal in the future for me and let’s just say he wouldn’t have to wait for an answer. Lol.

@davidgrana1268 3 года назад

I’m in the same boat, my girlfriend doesnt want to move here but it will be very hard for me to move and leave my all time friends and family, i feel like i have to choose so i dont know what to do

@TheBeanHome 6 лет назад

That is how my marriage started and that is how military marriages have to work when the man goes out to war. The key is all in commitment.

@JessieLewis 7 лет назад

Me too! I moved to Brazil to be with my boyfriend last year, now he has come to the US and we will marry in one month. The distance allows you to get to know them DEPENDING on their investment.

@mrs.m8926 7 лет назад

Jessie Lewis I definatly feel that I got to know him better emotionally and not depend completely on the looks... I got to know his soul and personality

@JuliaFMoreira 7 лет назад

Jessie Lewis that's so cute! I'm from Brazil btw

@palladiumhunter2186 7 лет назад

+Pink Owl I agree.

@ZenithValor 7 лет назад

My boyfriend is in Brazil and I'm in UK, been together for 4 years D: my best friend, my family and the only person truly there for me

@JessieLewis 7 лет назад

Ria amen !!!!

@kayliecollins5917 5 лет назад

This video just hit home. My LDR partner has traveled all over the place, but everytime he is suppose to visit me....something comes up. Everytime I try to visit him, its not a good time. Red flags started popping up everywhere. There are only so many excuses that can be said before you realize the truth and trust is gone. I started blaming myself for his lack of effort, but then I realized....if I'm not important enough for a text or call daily, then how will a relationship work in person. So, I removed myself from it. I had to start thinking about myself and my well being and I'm actually happy now. I'm single, and I get lonely, but right now....I'm focusing on myself and improving me before I try to love again.

@cristinag2275 7 лет назад

Thank You Matthew, your videos will forever be what helps me. I started watching your videos 2 years ago and developed standards in my life, and soon after I noticed not only my friends, but many others coming to me for advice in their life and now they too, are establishing standards. 6 months ago I met the most perfect man I thought and he treated me better than I ever thought any man would. The things he would do for me, and the way he treated me, everything was perfect and I was so happy. I thought he was too, but 2 weeks ago he broke up with me because the distance was too hard for him. I've been in denial trying to figure out how to make it work, as I stumbled across this video. I now realize it isn't going to work, being that sex is important for both of us, and his life is there, and mine is here. Matthew, you will forever be the only man I actually listen too and take your advice 100%. You've changed my life for the better time and time again.

@chefeju 7 лет назад

I wish I could have seen this video two years ago. Lost 1 year in a long distance relationship that was only real in my head. Thanks Matthew for your amazing videos

@janetyingy 7 лет назад

COMPLETELY AGREE!!! My ex was too damn lazy to move with me after I found out I got into graduate school; he wanted to stay at home to live with his parents, work only part time (when he could be working full time and making 60k/yr enough to live and move with me).... def not committed enough. I definitely think money and finances has a huge role to play in maintaining a serious committed exclusive relationship. My current partner wants to do long distance without even a plan as to when he's gonna move in with me, as he barely even makes enough money in his blue collar service job AND lives with his parents and can't really support himself independently. I think people need to be able to support themselves fully and independently before supporting someone else!! I really do feel that money is very important, especially when you know what it's like to not have any.

@goddess_Kate 2 года назад

This popped up and I'm watching it from Houston- I met my man last September when he visited Denver- and moved in May. It is a means to an end. 💕

@anacristinaferreira1433 4 года назад

I have been in a long distance for 3 years now. We meet each other while he was doing a student exchange program here in Brazil. I felt in love at the moment I met him , and even though we are almost 2 years apart due to corona virus , we are still strong and I love him more each day . With him , I feel things are easier and I would have never imagined myself in a long-distance relationship. But with this man , I feel I could wait for years in order to see him again . Of course there are difficult moments , for example , when we fight , or cannot hugs or kisses or sex . I often miss him so much that it hurts . And even though he is not physically to share in the moments in my life , I still feel as though he is here with me. After this pandemic. He is going to move to Brazil! And I hope things stay really good between us ! My wish is that we can look back at this comment in the future to talk about how we will be in the future and see how far we have come ! ❤️

@Dylan-kw6ss 4 года назад

I'm so happy that I met you when I was in Brazil and I am counting down the days until we can be together again. It seemed like such random chance to be able to meet you that first night, and I still am just amazed at where we ended up since then. I always love the memories that we made together and can't wait to make more in the future

@anacristinaferreira1433 4 года назад

Dylan , I love you so much. I’ll love you forever. Even when I can’t.

@Allexandra04 2 года назад

Awww hope this worked out, guys! God bless! 🙏🏻❤️

@whatlifeisabout 6 лет назад

I'm from Portugal, he is from Africa. We met when he went to my college in Portugal to do his last year of degree. We started dating and we were together for 7 months. He had to go back to his country (Africa and Portugal is more complicated because of passports and stuff :( and we made 2 months LDR. He visited me for 11 days back in October and it was amazing. The goodbye part is the worst part and now we don't see each other for 4 months, it really hurts. Only 2 months left for us to be together, I can't wait. We really love each other and plan one day to get married.

@brittanywilcox7377 2 года назад

My gf of two years and I have been long distance the entire time and are doing great! It's the healthiest relationship either of us have had. She's close enough to drive and visit about once a month. We take turns seeing each other, and plan as many trips as possible. She's stayed with me for up to ten days at a time. We know each other so well, and have supported each other through very difficult things. We've made plans to move in together, get married, and start a family in a couple years. I'm very excited about it!

@irislama4695 3 месяца назад

Did you guys got married? After how long living together?

@brittanywilcox7377 3 месяца назад

@@irislama4695 hi there! We did move in together! We will have been living together a year next month. It's been wonderful!

@aankana18 5 лет назад

I’m in a long distance relationship and i know it’s difficult but if the efforts made are from both the sides then things make sense. You both should appreciate each other and invest some time together every day. Also be smart in understanding the person, if he or she is showing signs of not being in the same mindset as your then stop the relationship instead of dragging it.

@mistercuddleswurth3723 6 лет назад

you nailed it for me when you stated being with them because you get your fix from enjoying having someone to talk to about how your day went. And yes, too many time we are not honest with ourselves and end up just settling or realizing that we made a mistake.

@MonicaMold 5 лет назад

Wow, a lot of comments...we had a long distance relationship, but we talked a lot, probably more than some couples living in the same place. After 5 years (we lived in different European countries) I moved to be together and I don't regret it. I now realise proximity is essential and enjoying every minute of it. This relationship was constructed step by step (monthly visits, holidays and a lot of communication and commitment from both of us), we are not perfect, but we are enjoying and evolving together. Matthew is right, assess the relationship, have a plan that you build together. Make sure you are in it for the right reasons, not just for the sake of being in a relationship. A big kind hug for everyone out there in a distant relationship...I know it's not easy.

@eternamenteamata 7 лет назад

This video came up at the exact perfect time. It left me with a bit of sadness because I've just jumped into a long distance relationship that I know it's gonna be log distance for at least two years.

@Данейя 4 года назад

Hi. So it's been 2 Yeats after you wrote this comment and jumped into LDR. How is(was) it going? What advices can you give? Maybe shortly tell your story? 😅

@erikavanessa3980 2 года назад

How did it go?

@Sweetgirl420 5 лет назад

I’m in a long distance relationship.. it’s beautiful!!! He hasn’t changed in any way. We talk.. text.. video chat at least 4 times a day. It WORKS!!! We are so in love. He is moving 8000 km to be with me in September!!!! The best man I could ever have met.

@NoName-ph5pg 5 месяцев назад

How are you doing, guys?

@joually 7 лет назад

the "plan thing" is really the deal breaker for me now...if you're lucky, the other person is realizing how rare that special connection you two share is, and he/she is ready to plan to meet for good, or be together or just to go further on than just living the fantasy of what the other person is or of what you two could be someday if only you lived in the same city, country or continent (true story)....but often it's just sweet talk or daydreaming. And the more you spend time expecting for realness to happen with a sweet talker/ daydreamer, the more you'll end up heartbroken (true story here too). The thing is on the phone, or via Skype or texts, you only show the other person what you want to show and then, you fall for a version of this person that does not really exist. I'm not saying you shouldn't try something incredibly romantic if you meet someone that you feel is "right for you but unfortunately geography gets in the way". I'm just saying that as long as it's only talks and dreams and wishes and hopes and that nothing is planned for REAL, don't hold your breath too long. No plans = No investment. When you realize that, it's time to move on to real life again !

@lesorellastre2785 7 лет назад

This is so true it hurts...

@joually 7 лет назад

this too shall pass ;)

@siivouslista746 5 лет назад

Such a discouraging video really 😩 You don’t immediately have to know for sure about moving in, you can do a couple visits, take your time. And moving in is different than wanting to live in the same city!

@junochide8376 7 лет назад

Long distance relationship is not for everyone. I met my boyfriend online, starting dating but later find out he was dating other women online. Lucky are those who found the right one.

@andressac27 4 года назад

Same!! It was terrible...

@valeriehenneberger25 7 лет назад

I literally High Fived the screen when you said that physical intimacy is very important to you because it is for me too. That's only part of the reason my last relationship didn't pan out.

@alishawhite1862 7 лет назад

I met my boyfriend over 2 years ago now and have spent over a year as a distance couple and I think that if you both know you are fully committed to and in love with each other then having a longterm goal is the next most important step. I have worked extra hard this past year with my college studies so that I can (hopefully!) go to a university closer to my man! LDR require effort, commitment, and an open-minded headset. If you're thinking about having a long distance relationship then I would say that it is hard, you do get emotional and things do feel unfair sometimes but it is key to remember that you are the only person who is putting yourself through it and that if the end goal means that much to you then you pull through together as a couple and accomplish it as you become stronger people!

@pinksalmon9882 7 лет назад

I met my husband while travelling in NYC for 1 week, we have been married for 4 years, together for 5. I moved. But I told him right from the start that I didn't want to have a long distance relationship and wasn't looking to keep it on for awhile.

@nicecube2798 6 месяцев назад

How did you guys find out within one year and in an LDR that you guys wanted to marry each other?

@pinksalmon9882 6 месяцев назад

@@nicecube2798 we went on mutual vacations together during that year and I visited him in NYC and he visited me in Russia. The relationship just felt right, it was healthy and easy, felt like home. Been together since 2012.

@TheLooselois 5 лет назад

I was in a LDR for three years. We talked about me moving to the states from Hong Kong but I told him I’m not going to do that unless there’s solid commitment from him. I ended up leaving him because he eventually told me he’s not ready for marriage. In my head I was like, if you’re not ready after three years then you’ll never be ready

@alittlebitoflifeTiff-Mirko 7 лет назад

It depends on how honest you are and blunt. I met my husband online (he's 6,000 miles away in Serbia) We met in person in June for the first time and found we were exactly who we said we were and knew our love was real. Got married three weeks later. I had to return stateside and we are now long distance again until he can come to states in 6+ months.

@lauraberg6272 5 лет назад

My husband and I did this successfully. It took a lot of hard chats, video chats, honest conversations with family and friends and the willingness for me to go to the other side of the world and marry him. They can work, but selfishness, lies and unrealistic expectations are a big no, no. For us we had to recapture joy because we got into that "I love and miss you and can't actually be with you mode" in the beginning. Then we met in person, and he stayed with my family for about two weeks. He got permission from my parents that visit to propose and a few years later we married (visa processes held this up, not our relationship) then I moved to Australia, and began my life over essentially. It's not easy, but in the end I am with someone who loves me, loves my family, and is interested in maybe moving back to the US one day after he feels his parents are well taken care of in their older years.

@kristen8715 7 лет назад

I used to date a guy who constantly reminded me and everyone else how geographically undesirable I was. I lived about 40 min away from him and always drove to him. He drove to me once and complained about it the whole night. Obviously it didn't last long. I could say I got lucky.

@barbarariley3488 6 лет назад

Wow 40 mins away and the jerk couldn't.travel it. He better look for thr girl next door. What a nincompoop.

@hazelnut3941 5 лет назад

Kris ten omg only about 40 mins away and he complained about it 🤦🏻‍♀️ Im glad you got out from that relationship. Cheers to being single 🍻

@donihill6514 5 лет назад

40 minutes is literally nothing wth

@ابنةعلاءالدين 5 лет назад

You gotta thank god for that..

@blackbullet4254 4 года назад

Im soon planning to travel off Europe to meet the person that i think will be worth it

@turtlecrochets8653 Год назад

Its unfair to single out ldr for being hard. Look around you, people cheat on spouses while living, sleeping, eating together. Divorces happen with people you live, day in and day out, not some person in some other city. Inherently low integrity folks come together in marriages and then end up divorced. Relationships fail coz of the people involved not because of presence or absence of distance!

@MatthewCoast 7 лет назад

Long distance relationships are hard!

@jasminepark5554 7 лет назад

Matthew is getting more attractive in every video 😩

@MS-xk7rd 5 лет назад

Ikr i wanna have his babies

@ابنةعلاءالدين 5 лет назад

I really have a crash on him😍😂

@sthefanycruz6396 3 года назад

i swear

@ellegrrace 4 года назад

I am currently in a relationship with a Man from America. I am living in Britain. We are in LDC and we are meeting in the next two months. He is half Korean and half Vietnamese. His family are religious and are very traditional when it comes to marriage and dating. I liked this part of him as I knew he would want to see a future with someone he was in a relationship with. About being on the same page I agree with that. We are both idealists which is a great as that is very essential as to an idea of if a long distance relationship will survive. We are very good at formulating plans and thinking about our future together and almost manifesting this In being straight-forward with conversations. Following on from people in the comments saying you can’t be in an actual relationship. It’s what you personally as yourself define a relationship. For me it’s always been companionship, protection, communication, co-operation, compassion and understanding. No one should define your own relationship and whether they believe it is or isn’t as it isn’t their business. It’s yours and If you have that deeper connection which I definitely have with this Man then you love them. I would leave my country for this man.

@olayoussef8455 7 лет назад

Great video Matthew! I've been in a long distance relationships before and didn't work out and I'm sick and tired of it. I believe this has wasted a lot of my precious time, energy & money and now I'm above 30 and not sure if I'll ever be with a real someone after those unsuccessful long distance relationships.

@YasminYoruba 7 лет назад

You need to set goals together, when you will actually be together for good! Long distance only works if you both have a plan like this video says. Open communication and love. A sense of reality is very important and being honest to yourself and the other person. There's many things that come with a long distance relationship though! It can be an amazing journey though and bring you closer! It's been over a year for me and next month I'm moving back home to be with my boyfriend and start our lives together.

@Olivias180 7 лет назад

Wow! A video that wasnt just an ad for his retreat!

@gettingaheadwithgoody4279 6 лет назад

Firstly, Happy New Year Everyone. Amazing video Matthew. I can relate to every point you made. I have actually been in a long distance relationship for 4years now. Created my channel on RU-vid to share my experiences with people. Here's my opinion. Like you said, a fixed date to see eachother is primary for the survival of the relationship. Sacrifice is also indispensable. In my case, I'm the one to move in 4months ...yeeeeaaah! However, i have come to learn a whole lot and i repeat, a lot, about myself and my partner thanks to the distance. We have also grown a certain indescribable level of connection that sometimes all I do is close my eyes, speak and he hears me. I don't know if there's a scientific research that backs that up. lol. Point is, LDR does work when both parties are deeply dedicated. We give away our desire for physical intimacy for that one person we believe is worth it. And everyday, since the last time I saw my partner (2years now) I have never regretted committing to him. Every decision we have taken in these 4years have been geared towards one goal "reuniting'. This is why TEAMWORK is more than vital. I cannot stress it enough. If one person alone is pushing for the relationship, if one person alone is willing to make the sacrifice- it won't work. The story may be different though for those who met online and have never seen eachother. If readers do not mind, they can visit my very small youtube channel for different tips on how to survive LD relationships. God bless.

@HotSakiiVideo 4 года назад

There is a distinction between a long distance relationship and a long distance flirtation. A relationship implies both parties are committed to each other and doing what it takes to make it work. That includes moving.

@MisScorpionGirl 6 лет назад

I've been in a long distance relationship for over two years now, and there are time when it gets soooo difficult, ofc the thought of breaking up has crossed my mind, but if you love your partner enough and believe that there is a future together waiting for you, then I think it is worth the wait 'cuz every time you see each other is so rewarding and amazing. basically it all depends on an individual, in my opinion

@nathalieduverna6963 5 лет назад

I've been in a LDR since February (2019) and we'll be together this summer. He sees a future and I agree. I believe he's my flame twin.

@chloeanastasia8440 6 лет назад

Stop you're going to make me cry!! x) You're so smart!! Long distance relationship is something that is addictive, that creates so much hapiness but, it's like you're always living in dream, and you nerver turn back to reality. Next, I will do my best, to meet people in reality. Because internet can help you to meet very good persons, but you don't have the ACTION side, the contact, the reality. I broke up with my boyfriend because of that. And he was okay with that. What maked me sad, is that I was always the only one to think about the difficulty of our relationship, while he was always happy. He said that my decision was mature, but why he never done it before by himself? I felt like I was the only one being invested. And with the time, I hated this feeling. I hope that in the future, I'll be more carefull, and I won't start to idealize a man that I have never met. In a nutshell, a man that I don't completly know.

@lydiahuang5133 7 лет назад

the most brutal moment in my long distance relationship was every time when he left, my whole world crushed behind him.

@chatchasa4213 7 лет назад

I tried my best and it hurt me terribly bad. I had no idea what happened. I did trust, I was faithful and prayed every night for a man and his family to be happy, healthy. The day I decided that I was worthless for him. I come back to be with myself, be happy, be with people who actually treat me well and love me the way I am. I love myself more and more, smiling prettier and prettier every day. I loved him all of my heart and what I did to him was from my true heart, I did really try best, still wishing him the best in everything in his life.

@marcrivaud6371 6 лет назад

Personally, i'm all for long distance relationship ! I experienced it when i was a teenager with a Canadian girl i met on the internet and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I discovered that i could meet people from other countries and have a really deep intimacy and a sincere relationship no matter the miles that separate us from each other. She was the first and only girl i fell in love with and it was just magical the few years it lasted. Then our mutual feelings evolved and we have an amazing friendship. Even though i don't feel like i'm still in love with her, she still has the same place in my heart. But i do agree that for me, physical promixity will, to a certain point, become essential to the relationship, but i can wait as long as necessary if she is worth it and if she shows me that i'm worth it to her. If you have the opportunity to live something really special and intense (i don't talk about sex, i talk about LOVE aka the REAL SHIT), with someone you know well enough to give it a try, just GO FOR IT, no matter the distance, his/her situation, other people's opinion (which is usually bullshit). But if you're actually in love, all of this doesn't matter for you anyway. I don't care if the next girl i meet is homeless or in an non-appealing situation, i don't care if she doesn't know how to flirt with me, i don't either so at least we will have that thnig in common that will make us having the best awkward moments of our relationship.

@cinzabeary5226 6 лет назад

The hardest pill to swallow is that LDR s are deemed as something you chose to commit to but you don't really know what exactly your getting into. Your friends and family will tell you all the time how hard a LDR is and wish you the best. But if your looking for a shoulder to cry on when your having a rough time, no one will sympathize.

@economiacapitalista4382 7 лет назад

Wow this video reminds me a long distance relationship I had fews years ago. I lived in USA and he used to live in Dominican Republic... Well, the relationship ended after 7 years, because he did not want to come to the USA.

@anitaaaah 2 года назад

And honestly positivity is so important!! Dont as the first thing in the morning think something negative about them. think positive, think of all the things you have done together, and yet more to come. think of all he sacrifies for you

@JayofallTrades 7 лет назад

My long distance boyfriend just broke up with me because he said he was done. He couldn't do it anymore not being able to see me and be together the way we used to before I had to move away. I'm heartbroken now because I planned on marrying him someday. I thought it was working out well enough. We each had our own lives and I guess we didn't communicate enough like we should have. Before it happened i was happy. I had made everything I thought about to be somehow about him. I even quit watching these videos. I figured I wasn't going to ever need to find another guy again. That fantasy emploded in my face cuz here i am again unloading my heart out to the internet and just back to square one. I really don't want to start over. I feel like I am getting too old for this and the dating pool is shallow. My heart can't take anymore after 40 plus break ups since puberty. I've exhausted my heart to its limits to where I feel like there are no more chances for me at love.

@rabeccaosman5014 7 лет назад

Joycelyn Porter it's OK.. He doesn't deserve you life is good without him

@mimi10115 5 лет назад

I've been in a LDR for a month. He is coming to see me for the weekend. We are in different sides of the country. He is working, I am finishing school and saving up money. As soon as my school is done, I'm moving to him and I am more than willing to follow him wherever his work takes him. Our ldr is temporary with marriage as our end goal once I'm done with school. I love having him in my life and it is difficult but in the end, it will be worth it.

@freebein 7 лет назад

I've been in a long distance relationship for 3 years. What's most important is that both sides are equally involved. The best part for me is when I get to see him after a few weeks. I feel that we grow stronger and the connection is stronger because of our time apart, we were able to miss each other and value our time together when we meet again. Trust really is 10x more important than if they were living in the same city. You will think crazy thoughts, especially at first. And if that trust is violated in any way it's so so so hard to just trust again. The work that was 10x harder is now 50x harder.

@nihalhathaway4089 4 года назад

I agree in some points, but I think a long distance relationship is not something you just slip into without knowing how you get there. Because honestly, if you have the slightest doubt if you like the other person that much, you wouldn't even bother to keep this going and keep suffering whilst not seeing each other. I am in a LDR and I would never stay if I doubted my feelings because it's absolutely not worth it staying in a LDR if I'm not sure about the other person. Whilest on the other hand, if your boyfriend or girlfriend lives two blocks away from you, you might just stay in the relationship without overthinking it too much because it's easy. LD is not easy. So you don't stay in it because it's easy.

@VixenVilleInge 7 лет назад

only channel I care to see the videos as soon as they come out! Always leave having learnt something new to think about. Love you Matthew!

@hello_clary3791 3 года назад

I met my person online during Covid. We went on a few dates and became very very close. I have never had such a strong emotional connection with a person I hardly knew. I was open with him about my life at sea and he was all for it (loving my independence). We were both hopeful and positive. Ive now been away at sea for 4 months, 3 months to go. Our love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation, we have lost both and have both started to shut down. Nothing can prepare you for this, literally only the strongest love survives. Wish me luck, 90 more days to go x

@rokmk2777 7 лет назад

Something just awesome came up to my mind about LDR. So, if you are in ldr you can get an item(like a bracelet,necklasse,ring) that you can both wear(thats not to feminine or masculine) and you can swap it every time you meet. When you come to your partner you give him/her that item. Than he/she has a memory of you. Than next time you meet he/she gives you it and than you have a memory. Isn't that cool and romantic?!

@rowenavece4449 7 лет назад

I was in a relationship that after 2 years turned into a long distance relationship because he moved to another country ...I resisted one other year, basically for all the promises he made but as soon as he started to let me down, I started to open up to new people and have physical attraction for someone else...I still feel connected to him in a kind of way because our story didn't not end for lack of love but for the circumstances but I still think that long distance relationships are self destroying!

@tialowrens6372 7 лет назад

I have distance relationship now for 10months and we are so in love :)

@Данейя 4 года назад

Are you still in? 😅😍

@rinarinarina100 7 лет назад

100% truth. I asked my self those questions, and I fit into all of them. I broke up with the him and months later, I met the man of my life. I now can say that I have never actually truly loved a man until I met my husband. If you're keeping a long distance relationship just because you are too comfortable, lazy or scared to start over, you're NOT in love already and that's when you should end it. Because if you or the guy loved each other so much, wouldn't you or him have been trying to move to the other side already?

@user-dr5jv1wk4j 7 лет назад

"Cant have him? We ll see about that. O.o o.O" lmao

@monsun3365 5 лет назад

I had my doubts today... This video helps... You just showed me what everyone is saying, she wasnt fit for me... I was supposed to move to her across the Atlantic... She didnt want to help me with the paperwork but before she wanted to brake up with me because 'i didnt want to move to her' as soon as i said i will... She stopped... Thank you Mathew and everyone... Proving me right... I have to stop looking for the mistakes in myself

@skube1408 7 лет назад

I've been with my partner for nearly 8 years. He is in the Australian Army so we have a long distance relationship quite often when he is deployed! "Distance always makes the heart grow fonder"

@encrypto5077 6 лет назад

This is by far the most accurate video on LDR I have ever seen! Won't lie I too am in a LDR and this Was something I always worried about. Thank u for sharing this

@swansil 7 лет назад

This video is gold, thanks Matt and Jameson! For the past few weeks you've been choosing topics that are too current to my own life that it makes me laugh every week a new one's out hahaha enjoy your weekend!

@barbaraklein.plussize 7 лет назад

It can work. It worked for me almost 20 years ago, when I was a 15 years old teenager living in Brazil who met over the internet a Brazilian guy 3 years my senior living in Japan. Despite him living in the other side of the world, we couldn't stop talking to each other everyday, even when he didn't have internet anymore. It was like we always knew each other, and it hurt to not be together fiscally to the point that he came here to meet me in person one year later. The next year he came back so we could marry, and after 3 years, I went to Japan to live with my husband for good. So, if you talk and listen to each other and both respect the relationship you're in, it will be worth all the pain the distance have caused to you, because you'll know it was a hurdle that was there to strengthen what you have. True love is meant to cause suffer and pain sometimes, and if you're able to survive, it will be worth it in the end. Trust me, 3 years of pain were worth it, since I've been married for 17 years with the love my life.

@LovelyMizzChanty 7 лет назад

I've been in a long distance relationship for 1,5 years....turns out I was just a replacement for for one of his best female friends that lived in his city and he couldn't get her to be his girlfriend. He shattered my heart. I'll never invest in long distance relationships ever again.

@ariannadventures 7 лет назад

I tried to stop it from becoming more than a friendship but all his attentions made feel safe to trust him and brave enough to want him in spite of distance. Before anything could ever happen he realised he didn't want to fall for me to just have a long distance relationship and decided we could no longer keep in touch. He then changed his mind and asked for more time because he was confused, but so was I and I respected his doubts. I've waited but one day he stumbled and I found out the hard way he was on a relationship already. The best explanation he gave was that it was an on and off thing but as I asked for more he disappeared. After all the time lost what hurt the most was not the lies but the way he didn't care enough to say the truth at last. To be almost lovers feels like giving up on something you never had and overwhelming like waking up from a dream to reality.

@fareenahanes3546 7 лет назад

I am married and its still we are in long distance relationship..due to situations we cant be together always seeing each other every 3 months for a,few weeks

@mollydooke 7 лет назад

Fareena Hanes I'm in a long distance relationship with my bf. We see each other for a week every four months and plan on getting married soon.

@tropicalbchick 7 лет назад

Fareena Hanes i am too 😕

@fareenahanes3546 7 лет назад

And after marriage will it be the same ?

@mollydooke 7 лет назад

No. We are currently going through his visa process. It takes 12 months apparently. Then he will live with me in Australia.

@tropicalbchick 7 лет назад

@fareena hanes how far apart are you all?

@gwynnielsen5081 7 месяцев назад

Long distance works until it doesn't. The fact of the matter is that you are apart, growing separately. In my situation, I loved the man, and he didn't know how he felt (after nearly five years). The bottom line was that he didn't/wouldn't go the distance to be together; I was the one who was always winding up on his doorstep. Which is never a good sign. If you are going to brave this kind of relationship, make sure the other person is willing to tow the mark. If not, walk on by.

@dster7413 7 лет назад

Im in a long distance relationship for almosr 2 years And it is hard, i feel lonely most of the time I love her, i realy do, but sometimes it feels like im the only one investing in this relationship and it hurts, a lot I just need someone to hold me, someone to talk to, someone who is there when i need them

@davidgrana1268 3 года назад

You still together?

@littlecolinaph 7 лет назад

I've met my special someone in a coffee shop in the Philippines, spent 3 weeks with him everyday and we decided not to get intimate until marriage. I went back to hongkong then he visited me just last week. Now he's in Ukraine, then Philippines again for work. Next week I will be in USA for work as well. He'a Ukrainian, Im Filipina. I guess the constant travelling is our common ground and realized no matter who we get into a relationship with, it will always be LDR. Before we decided to be in this relationship, we know we both wanted it. We made rules and sticked with it. He would always encourage me to talk and communicate with him for a better foundation. So far so good 😊

@Bamgeutcutiepie 7 лет назад

sitting here and can't relate because I'm totally and completely single AF 😄. Luckily for me I LOVE it. I really don't want a relationship. So I don't know why anyone would want a long distance relationship because I don't even want one where I could see him everyday 😝

@dreamscape405 7 лет назад

emma Woods agreed! I don't know how LDR's are even successful. The majority of men in LDR will eventually end up being physically intimate with someone else who is in close proximity anyway meanwhile still telling their LDR woman how much they love her. I agree that being single is a wise choice, especially in these times. I ended my last relationship 5 years ago and I've been much more peaceful remaining single.

@meganshah6079 7 лет назад

Me and my boyfriend are in a long distance relationship for 2 years now. We met in university and were friends for a while and then started dating. After a months I had to leave and go to another country and he also went back to our home country. We love each other so much and we have a perfect relationship. What I am trying to say is that, it can work if two people love each other and trust each other and are at the same page! If you never met your partner I suggest that you arrange a visit asap because so many things will change after actually meeting someone. Being apart is not easy but it can also bring your relationship and love to another level... plus it teaches you to appreciate every single second that you have with each other❤️

@MyVlogTherapy 7 лет назад

I'm so glad you added a male perspective and video.. It's a good time to bridge the gap. Sometimes I feel like, "girls on this side and boys on the other" in life. 😀 Ps. I'm the girl who sees a guy I can't have and says #challenge 😋. Gotta break that

@chocomaribel 7 лет назад

Three years of never seeing each other has taken a toll on our relationship. We always argue and he always dumps me almost every week. Its crazy painful when youre seriously invested in something virtual lol.

@diana-elena4655 7 лет назад

Ah I remember my first long distance relationship- terrible. I remember my second one too- even worse. Conclusion: never again!

@Owlferein 5 лет назад

Well, in France we have a saying: "Jamais deux sans trois" Never two without three.

@OvidiuBolocan 5 лет назад

Diana, crede-mă că relația ar fi mers dacă amândoi v-ați fi asumat ce vă doriți, părțile pro și contra ale unei relații, încrederea unul în celălalt, părțile voastre bune și rele și dacă ați fi avut un plan să va mutați împreună... Ideea e să fiți amândoi pe exact aceeași nișă, să iubiți sincer și în mod egal, să aveți timp unul pentru altul, altfel nu merge :))

@Raquel-cf7hd 5 лет назад

Same, the 2 were both cheaters

@danny_phantom91 5 лет назад

I just started talking to a lady i met on a dating app for over a month now. I'm here in the US and she is in Brazil, and yes, we've been able to video chat so I know I'm talking to a real woman. Things seem to be going really well between us, and we are both really serious about visiting each other and developing our relationship further!

@theblackdaria_ 7 лет назад

YOUR VIDEO TOPICS ARE ALWAYS RIGHT IN TIME!!!! WOOOOOOOOOooow! I just got out of a possible LDR situation and I think the term Jameson came up with "cognative distonance" is SO REAL!!! I think if he was in the same area as me we wouldn't have made it as far as we did. All the points you made in this video were valid. All the way to the sex/intimacy part. I think I possibly fell in "lust" and got caught up in the fantasy of our situation. Which sounds crazy& like a fetish maybe?¿😬 but I think ultimately I knew it couldn't work, even though there was a part of me that hoped it would, but maybe more for the fantasy of it all. "Be honest with yourself," "Know thy self," and I'll add one..."Trust yourself," can this really work? If the answer is no, it'll be hard at first(I'm currently going through that hard part, but slowly working my way out), but you can do it.

@Chris_at_Home 3 месяца назад

I was in a LDR for 3 years. I flew from Alaska to Ct every other month for those 3 years starting when we were 56. We have been married 11 years now. I knew her from school but hadn’t seen her since 71. I met her in 65 and as young teens we’d flirt but never went further. Her friends used to always tell me she liked me but she’d act embarrassed when they did so I thought it was a joke. We have never felt a deep love that we have now.

@BlackNella 7 лет назад

I usually really appreciate your advice but you kinda lost me on this one. Seems like some really negative and cynical perspectives.Why does a plan have to be in place so soon? As you know, we don't always know if we want to marry someone right away. Even if we get into an exclusive relationship, there is something to be said for taking things one day at a time and letting life unfold. I supposed plans can develop naturally when it is time for that. However I do believe that some people are quite satisfied with the distance and that's okay too. We need to let go of the notion that relationships have to be prescriptive and look any one way.

@lisaandmat 7 лет назад

Idk how your new vids are like mind reading tricks every week, but I'm laughing right now bc I thought this week's topic was not for me when you announced it on FB Live even though it was great how you asked for input on the tricky subject. Then the description hit me like a bag of bricks as I recently fell for a guy after a few weeks of sharing some of the most in depth conversation I've had in my life all to find out he unexpectedly got in to his dream hospital residency program in LA (aka the opposite side of the USA!) 😣 I was devastated and considered a short term long distance thing, but ONLY if there was a plan to move me out there as we determined if we were both feeling the love enough. 😕 He was not open to finding out and our intimate relationship became a super cold friendship over night. So hearing this from u is always a great reminder of the two way street love drives on. 💕 so appreciate all you share!

@stayroxy 7 лет назад

so the only way you can achieve intimacy is through sex ? Guess since I am waiting for marriage I am screwed then. :/. I know many christians who do the same and have extremely close and intimate connections that lead to marriage where of course yes sex is a big part of it. I love matthew's advice but I don't think he hit the mark with this one.

@selenafuxfell 7 лет назад

I think it works, if you have a common goal. It worked for me, because we knew that we would move in together after one year of being together. :)

@mind8906 7 лет назад

This definitely struck a chord with me. I've been in a long distance relationship for 3 years but still don't feel like I have been with this person long enough to take the next step. The horrible thing is that he's ready but I'm not so I keep hurting him by saying I'm still not ready :(

@alv6353 5 лет назад

This is exactly my situation, just the other way around. My boyfriend of two years keeps telling me that he's not ready, that he needs more time but I am and for me two years is more than enough to know if you want to give the next step with someone. Did you feel ready at some point? Or your doubts were about him being the one? Hope everything is going well for you.

@irislama4695 3 месяца назад

Are you now together?

@classytech3113 2 года назад

Thank you for the video. This just confirmed that I am investing in a long-distance relationship that is complete the opposite of what you mentioned here. So it can happen and might be rare but they can work 100% don't lose hope if you are in one that is going in the right direction.

@RedRumble14 2 месяца назад

So how it’s going for u? Are u the same nationality?

@melolusion5718 7 лет назад

Thank you! someone finally tell us HOW SHIT romeo and juliet story is

@KitsuneAkali 7 лет назад

Melolusion ohhhh lot of people have said it. It was even pointed out in a cartoon before. 😂

@0Demiyah0 7 лет назад

Melolusion Romeo and Juliet were 13 and 17 years old, knew each other for a week, and 6 people ended up dead. Romeo and Juliet is about the destruction of a teenage infatuation. I don't find the comparison all that useful.

@melolusion5718 7 лет назад

Eva it's stupidity. -_- let us not forget romeo was still mourning over his love for the previous girl. so bad he ended up at juliet's family's party and thus met juliet. not a very good role model in terms of love. they're so so stupid they didn't even communicate properly hence the misunderstanding that led to their deaths.

@0Demiyah0 7 лет назад

Melolusion Yeah exactly. How does that relate to two adult people falling in love through communication? JP sears explained this so called Romeo and Juliet effect a lot better.

@KitsuneAkali 7 лет назад

Eva you answered your own question. To quote the cartoon I referenced: "It's not a tragedy... It's a communication's error!" People constantly compare themselves to them as if their story is "goals". Who, btw, at that time weren't considered children by those ages.. Not to mention it wasn't about teenage infatuation, that was a smokescreen. The real problem was the events happening due to some long-standing family feud.. which was a public way to give social/political commentary.

@foreveryoungpisces7426 6 лет назад

I became friends with someone who lives on another continent on a film page nearly a year ago. We talk for hours, and touch base nearly every day. After months of chatting by text we finally talked on the phone (I was too shy) and we eventually became intimate. I've not met a man this stimulating for decades. I'm grateful for this sweet, wise, intelligent man who I hope to meet most likely early next year. I'm game, the risk is worth it.