He Ruined His Marriage Throwing Temper Tantrums (Shayne Love Is Blind) Message me on my Insta! / sixteenleo_ Subscribe to my tribe ! / @sixteenleo Spotify! open.spotify.com/artist/59ivA...
to everyone who has said this is a bad take, or something that you cannot agree with, that is your opinion and I'm more than valid to have my own. its beyond toxic to only blame one person for a failed relationship and seeing some of the comments are super disappointing, especially because its so easy to see Shayne's flaws but not Natalie's. Just because he operates a certain way, pigeon holing his behavior whilst allowing her to roam freely is why I hesitate to make these videos at times. As I said this is my opinion, and my channel and its really sad that i cannot point issues out with both people just because the majority only want one person to be the bad guy, which just isn't the case.
This is such a nuanced take! Shows that you're a thinker. I agree with your take on this. Its so easy to vilify Shayne when we had ACTUAL representation of Natalie being nasty towards Shayne. Especially when they went on the romantic getaway. She was mean, passive aggressive, sarcastic to the point of it being just plain ugly. So, yeah. She not some angel.
This is why we love you Leo!! You have a beautiful nuanced insight into relationships and how they should be balanced that most others do not. I wish you were my Skippy
16Leo, don’t worry about the Complainings in the comment section lol Some people don’t want to just simply agree to disagree with you. You can please everyone 100% of the time so don’t stress please! :) take care
I appreciate the nuance, and I definitely don't think Natalie is perfect, but the moment after he confused her for Shania is pretty much textbook gaslighting. I respect your opinion, I hope people will respect mine, and I hope everyone has a nice day.
I feel like Shayne is the kind of guy who stays awake for four days straight, and wakes his roommate/parents up by punching them at 3:30 AM to ask where the AAA batteries are
@@gorefieldluvr6921 I’m with ya but also who says A. A. A. 💀 I’ve only heard double A or triple A so if someone asked for “ay ay ay” I’d also be confused 😩 I do agree that either way, though, Shayne would just scream
A lot of people seem to be missing that in the wrong name debacle, Shayne said, "Shaina? That's who I wanted it to be," and THAT is the biggest issue. It adds a completely different layer of why it was hurtful to Natalie, even if he hypothetically said that to Shaina just to be flirtatious to her.
Not to mention him hyping her up about him writing her name on his notebook and her being his number one and all of these things Natalie did not Get these expectations by herself he gave them to her and then did something like that and then proceed to gaslight her for being MILDLY upset
1000% that's what I was going to say. Getting the name wrong was awkward, but once he said that's who he wanted it to be I was like... yikes that's gotta hurt
Shane changing his sitting position, everytime the camera cuts to him, was the highlight of the season. I was genuinely laughing out loud. I am glad you mentioned it. Also, I'd say ShainA was probably the most _obvious_ toxic one in the show; like, not to shlt on her too much, but it just felt like everything she said had me side-eyeing her, suspicious.
My girlfriend said she straight up almost pissed her pants when she heard that deranged laughter while she was in the other room. So yeah would probably work 😂😂😂
I once went on a date with a guy because he was acting genuinely depressed, and just kept guilt tripping me about how “lonely” he was as if that was my fault. Huge mistake. He insisted on going to a shitty sports bar so he could eat three baskets of chicken wings and then tried to demand a BJ in my car in the parking lot. I wish I’d kicked him out then and there, but I’m embarrassed to say I drove him home while he fake cried.
I’m an introvert and I think after an encounter with Shane, it would drain my social battery. He has such an explosive personality. I like him but could only take him in tiny doses 😂
I'm not a psychologist, but it almost looks as if Shane may have untreated ADHD. His behavior reminds of a toddler I used to babysit who has the disorder.
@@blubberingbuffoons Yeah I didn't get narcissist vibes from him at all. he didn't seem like a bad guy, just someone who's can't control their emotions to a degree that's expected from adults. It's kind of a pity because I think they could have worked out if they got some help.
@@vanyadollyNot all of us can get help, sadly. Some of us are immune to medication. And we’re also often lead to believe that all of our symptoms are normal and that our genuine struggles are just excuses that everyone else can get over easily.
@@mossyfriends1911 Yeah, I know the struggle. 😞 I was diagnosed as an adult, and I don't know how I would have survived otherwise. Finding the right medication also took years. I'm lucky to live in a country with free healthcare or that probably wouldn't have happened.
Natalie had every right to be hurt. It's not like she handled it in a bad way, she was just hurt. Nothing toxic about that. Shane on the other hand gaslit the shit out of her.
I agree. She was feeling that giddy “I might be falling in love” feeling, and then the man said he was so delighted to be talking to OTHER NAME. She was hurt and shocked to find out he was more interested in someone else. He was a hyper narcissist man-child, and she was looking for a real relationship with a man. Expectations a bit too high, but not toxic.
I think Natalie had the right to be angry, and I don’t think she was bad for expecting Shane to be focused on her, because he ALREADY was telling Natalie that she was going to be his girlfriend and his number one. Without ever saying he was exploring his options. Basically, from what he was saying to both of these ladies, he expected them to only be committed to him while he explored his options without transparency. I feel like I’m the only one who thinks Shane is genuinely worse than Shake.
At least you know shake is shit from day one, Shane has some natural charisma that makes you think he's put together, then you find out he was playing the field while acting like he's already decided it's you. Shake at worst is an embarrassment, but depending where you're at in your life, a guy like Shane can be DEVASTATING
Whats scarier than being an asshole, is being a manipulative one at that. The fact Shane can wear a mask as though he’s completely innocent while manipulating others is what’s so terrifying.
Idk if Shayne is worse than Shake, but his manipulation flies under the radar more than Shake's. We also don't know what happened behind the scenes, but Shayne basically said he wanted to be with her, so the fact that he's talking to other girls just as passionately is a lie. He then tries to gaslight and manipulates, but then leaves the situation without talking. And further down the line, we know that he continues to lead on Natalie, like when he asks her to be his girlfriend, but still is very into Shaina. I had to stop watching this video after that part, as I can't watch a video where someone defends very toxic behaviors by saying "well, she's just as bad because she thought there was a relationship." Did not sit right with me.
The one true good take: Love is Blind is inherently toxic and therefore manipulates real people into being the worst versions of themselves for our entertainment then abandoned to live with the consequences.
Shayne is an energy vampire. If I meet any person like him, I'd be drained in minutes. I got a sense for these by now though and I usually give them all a wide berth... Not on my watch.
Imagine uniroinically believing this "energy" bullshit lol that's. Not what energy is. There's only one definition and it's the scientific one, because souls OBVIOUSLY aren't real
I feel like the scene where he calls her Shayna you got something wrong. Natalie was going about that as well as she could- she said she felt led on because she was feeling this connection, and was disappointed to hear that someone else was who he wanted to hear from. She didn't say "you led me on," she said "I feel led on." She's being completely open about her feelings instead of bottling them up in regards to all this. Plus, he said he was *hoping* it was Shayna, which would absolutely make her feel led on if he was specifically looking forward to someone else over her and didn't mention that.
Yes, absolutely agree. And before that he said that Natalie was his number one. I'm not surprised that she felt led on. I get that having multiple connections in the beginning is okay, but he could have at least communicated about that to Natalie.
What if he was hoping it was shayna to validate his connection with natalie? Like this is a future spouse possibly, id also want another convo with the 2nd person i was very interested in to validate my possible feelings or lack there of. As a women, id rather a guy be sure than tell me he is all in, but still has lingering thoughts or comments left unsaid with another person. Its easy to say, you shoulda done this or that, when its not you in the situation.
Natalie has said on social media that she had told Shayne she was going to say "no" at the wedding. Shane's erratic behavior makes more sense knowing that fact.
I dont think any of them are actually toxic, I think they're emotionally immature. Shane probably never had much options so the fact that he clicked with two people at the nearly same time was overwhelming and he was over the moon. Being immature he can't vocalise what he is feeling and thinking cause that requires abilities that he apparently doesn't have, like self awareness. Thats not toxic, that's just lack of development. And Natalie is a sweetheart, also like a child, she saw one opportunity and she hooked on it without taking the time to consider things out. but maybe those things are only visible to us outside, it would probably be different in there. Like Natalie was talking a lot but Shaina didn't say anything, so Natalie never really knew how mixed up Shane is.
Well said. People like to throw around the word toxic as if people just ARE poison. As you pointed out, nobody comes out of the womb perfect and we all have to learn how to be healthy on a social emotional level. I am sure both of them will reflect and learn through this experience and do much better when they have found someone new
Shayne is 100% disturbed. Him getting so mad at the baseball game was really weird. He’s got anger issues and Natalie did the right thing by saying no. I could see him being abusive later on. Natalie has her own issues too. She has very high expectations and wants her partner to change a lot for her. She doesn’t feel accepted by her parents which obviously plays into her insecurities.
Shayne has severe Adhd. It is a condition that often impacts every aspect of your thinking and behaviour, and it is a real struggle to deal with it in a neurotypical world. Calling him '100% disturbed' is at best ignorant, bordering on ableist. If you think someone has odd behaviour, best to check you aren't making fun of a person with a disability first.
@@JB-qf5ep I was abused for years by someone who had violent outbursts over the smallest things. Sorry if I don’t have sympathy for someone who flips out like a child over a baseball game. Behavior like that is what leads to abuse like what I endured
@@raigenhuss7030 I am sorry that you went through that. Nobody should be abused like that. Your experience does not negate the ableism in your original comment. When you pretend that neurodivergent symptoms are the same as neurotypical abusive behaviours, you erase our constant struggle to function in a world that was built to suit you, not us and you paint us in a horrible light. You put us in league with disgusting characters a d that is not right. You are engaging in bigotry - your pain does not absolve you of that nor does it give you license to cause harm to a minority community. I'm sorry for what happened to you. You still need to do better by other people.
Props to him for doing the mortifying for our sake I’d rather do it at home with a broken-ass printer that I can’t work. Or just do it online. Once I LEARN HOW TO FREAKING EDIT!!
Leo, you forget to mention by putting Natalie of the cover of his notebook that means no men will be interested in her. He basically marked her as his, I think he he led Natalie on to believe she was the only one he was interested in. He also brings up that Natalie is his number one.. He basically love bombed her.
Shane and Shaina are definitely the type of relationship that would last less than half a year cos they only wanna be together for superficial reasons -- sexual compatibility, physical appearances, having fun, etc. Even if he did pick Shaina in the end, I don't know how a marriage between them would even work. They'd get divorced after six months for sure.
What also bothered me was that Shaina just contradicted herself a lot, like she'd go to Kyle and be like I'm a christian and I don't feel comfortable sharing the same bedroom with you, but then while she was talking to Shayne she says "I'm a very sexual person", like bitch pick a personality trait. Like she only brought up her christian values so much to Kyle because she didn't like him but didn't mention it once to Shayne
Fr. And wasn't the problem actually that he made it sound like she was his number one and then he said he was hoping it'd be Shaina? I don't know how she could be more toxic than Shane who literally told her he hated her.
The entire premise revolves around getting together quickly. The producers *push* them to get together. If it wasn’t them, it would’ve been *another* couple who would be willing to do it, and they’d get the screen time.
Shaine is the kind of guy that cant handle any drama or arguments and walks away. The way hes squirming around the floor while talking tells me that he just avoids uncomfortable situations alltogether
Leo, like i get it, you don't wanna judge people. However, the way Shane behaves, like saying these hurtful things and then expects to be forgiven (and tries ro gaslight the ladies when they bring up legit concerns) is definitely toxic, and someone who is not ready to share his life with anyone. Even before they had a relationship. I think it's important to awknowledge that, cause i wouldnt want vulnerable people to ever think it's fine to enter a relationship with a person like that. That's gonna leave Them damaged and doubting their own worth
Jfc, he has a different opinion then you, and you have the audacity to guilt trip him for it? Because young people might listen and make the wrong decisions? What’s wrong with you people? Grow the fuck up.
shane's looping laughter throughout this video had me fearing i was going to wake up my roommates with my own hysterical (albeit, less disturbed) laughter
The reason Shayne was being so weird and agitated during the wedding was that apparently Natalie told him beforehand that she was going to say no and he still said yes either hoping or trying to manipulate her into saying yes as well. I don't know, it's hard to read what is really going on in this show because it is so heavily edited I don't really trust a lot of what people are saying.
Shane is a very shallow and honestly weak minded person. If he doesn't get constant affirmation that he is perfect in every way he just stops being able to function. To use my own relationship as a reference my girlfriend can walk in the room and tell my my forehead is the size of a Heathrow runway And I laugh because I love her to bits and I don't need her to constantly say she loves me to know she does, I trust her and feel secure.
I agree fully. He is so insecure that if she stops feeding him validation he immediately gets upset or defensive. My husband and I are the same as you, to the point that if one of us says “I love you” half the time our response is just “I know” b/c we don’t need to say it back we are confident in each other and ourselves with in the relationship.
Yeah I hate to break it to you butt... that forehead of yours.... its friggin massive. Butt I love it, and its amazing! Sexiest forehead on earth baby!
@@jordannrussell9378 hell ya that's honestly how it should be, it's not really love if you can't feel fully secure in yourself. You shouldn't have to say I love you back 24/7, they know!
I personally don´t think Natalie did anything wrong in the pods. She didn´t freak out and even said that there was nothing wrong with exploring other connections. Shayne however told her she was his number 1 from the get go, talked with her about marriage and moving in together, so she felt like they were on the same paige regarding these things. Hearing "Shaina, you´re just who I wanted to talk to, what are you wearing?" was just really hurtful. Plus she was just processing the situation and being quiet. Dr. Kirk Honda who runs the channel "Psychology in Seattle" has some really interesting thoughts on the couple, too. Everyone can have their own opinion of course, I just don´t believe it´s fair to call Natalie out for being really toxic since she has not shown many signs of toxicity.🤔😅
I think Natalie was completely justified being upset when Shane thought she was Shaina. Last we saw, he'd just asked Nat to be his gf (sounds pretty serious/borderline exclusive to me) and when he guessed it was Shaina, he was all like "oh, I was so hoping it was you, just the person I wanted to see" to the person he thought was not his gf. I'd be upset too. Also, "I think Natalie is just as bad"? Sorry what? I love you dude, but awful take. GF implies at the very least honesty between them, he wasn't honest and was gaslighting her on top of it all
Also how he was chatting with shana after deciding Nathalie should be his gf, and while being super flirty shana was like "isnt Nathalie your girlfriend" and he said something like "she wont know" or "shes not here" 💀 true cheater vibes... I would explode if i was Nathalie and saw that while watching the show
There was a producer of the show that did an AMA on Reddit, and they said that at that point in the show, you can request to speak with the person you like, and he went in there fully expecting it to be Shaina. The show set him up for the drama. The way he spoke to Natalie when he was caught was not okay, but just to give you an idea on how the show manufactures drama.
@@smyton4tw great point. And I guarantee 100% the reason everyone reveals it at the altar is at the producers insistence, and the couples are already fully aware there is no relationship.
N yeah Natalie was fine, a little goofy maybe but i think most of that vibe was in her accent. In the "tell all reunion" episode she sounded perfectly smart and seemed to rly have reflected properly on it all
I was hoping someone would point this out. It makes me wonder if he just watched some clips and didn’t see the context that shows you how perfectly reasonable Natalie was to be upset at that point
Hope you're enjoying the series. this has nothing to do with anything but i get a lot of people asking about the songs at the end and such. its me actually. Ill link below my spotify. some songs are unreleased, but soon they will be. Thank you for supporting, it honestly means the world to me. open.spotify.com/artist/59ivAkFE09mblTTpRrq77u?si=TK-ijMgRRWOo4znhg_05Lg
Woot! So excited to see another video drop so soon. Hopefully you're doing well and taking things easy! We love to see your content, but it's okay to take a break when you need it too. It's always a great to see new video notifications. Whether it comes out back to back, or if it came out a month apart I think we'd all still be just as excited to see it and support your content. Keep doing you and make sure to take care of yourself!
I agree with “they’re not toxic people but together they show toxic tendencies.” Because same lol. I’ve experienced a relationship that bring out that side of me and him, which I do not approve the behaviors, but in the moment you don’t realize the harm you’re doing until it’s too late. I appreciate your take on this. I already came to terms with so much in my equally harmful relationship but hearing what you had to say about the behavior really helped put into perspective of why/how they’re harmful. Also, my favorite take away from today is, everyone loves differently and that’s okay! Sometimes you can’t make it work because of this, so don’t force it to work
Shayne's the kind of guy whose friends have to constantly explain "no he doesn't have a meth habit, he's not going through psychosis right now, that's just how he is."
I love Leo, I just think he had some real bad takes on the situation. I think that Natalie's reaction to being called Shaina was justified, before that Shane said she was his number one. He said that before she said he was her number one too, and to have he said "just the person I wanted to see" and then the entire time she was silent just to go from an embarrassed I'm sorry to aggressive defensive is ridiculous. That is a true toxic trait not falling for someone quickly on a tv show where you get a few weeks to get married, honestly, Shane comes across as this goofy sweet golden-doodle of a guy he's very disarming. Shane's language at that moment felt like "it's your fault that you're upset, you're really just trying to hurt me" that is a true toxic trait. Natalie at the alter said he made her feel scared, which is very important to include.
Shayne also seemed to have sporadic anger issues like at the baseball game (which wasn't shown in this vid) and his out burst at the end of this video. His need for constant positive affirmation and not being able to have a serious conversation without storming out wasn't addressed in this video either.
I agree. I love Leo's content, but I haven't agreed with his recent takes with Love is Blind. I'm not sure if many people also watch Psychology In Seattle's take on Love is Blind/other reality shows. I think it might be a good resource for Leo to use for a professional perspective on some of these shows.
tbh that part was triggering as someone who used to be emotionally abused and gaslit by a partner, he would switch from apologetic, to defensive, to angry and blaming me so fast just to see which emotion would get the right reaction out of me, and I see that in Shayne a lot
Shayne is basically Matthew Mcconaughey if you dialed up the dude bro energy, tripled the douchbaggery, completely removed the talent, and crossed him with a clueless golden retriever that had an annoying laugh.
Pretty Accurate Description. I've never even seen this show and this guy sounds like an Asylum candidate!!! This'll go Yikes! Level(if it hasn't already!!!)
You just described Matt Mcconawhatever pretty specifically tho. Like that's not shayne you described that's just the actor. Since when was he TALENTED?
My personal experience when you're blinded by your love for someone else you're in a toxic situation! Don't blindly fall in love, walk into it with your eyes wide open!!
These two weren't a good match for each other. I feel a lot of the arguments in the beginning could have been avoided or resolved with just establishing boundaries and communication, BUT Shayne telling his fiancé she's the worst thing to ever happen to him, is extremely serious and hurtful for most people- if not an absolute deal breaker.
Gotta say I disagree with you big time on Natalie. There's no way you can compare her to Shayne. Also the show forces you to rush, its what they all go in there expecting, so a course she fell fast. I also understand what she means when she felt Shayne was yelling at her. He was getting aggressive and for someone more calm like her, it would come off as yelling. She even says after she turns him down at the alter that he didn't make her feel safe like her dad does. So really she's kind of like Deepti, where she knows what she does and does not deserve from a man.
44:38 I disagree, tbh. Natalie had that one over exaggeration when she said he was "raising his voice". Maybe she just meant that his tone was different, like he sounded more upset. People confuse those things. Also, her only true flaw in this was just being a hopeless romantic and falling in love too quickly, imo. She was justified in being upset when she assumed she was Shayne's only love interest. She didn't say he couldn't see other people, she was just upset. Which is valid. And Shayne saying that horrible stuff to her before her wedding definitely puts him in a worse place morally than her.
She did the right thing by walking away, what he said was abusive and you can't take that shit back and she knows he's just going to keep saying things like that
Natlie's love language is insults which I understand but not everyone does nor appreciates that. To me she should of been consider that Shayn definitely isn't like that. But one of my gripes with Shayn is that he needs constant validation. My father is in some ways like that and its tiring as hell. Both of them if they worked on those things separately might have been better together.
I agree completely. It also depends highly on the rapport you have with a person. My daughter and I constantly insult each other, like if I forget my keys she'll say "good job nerd", or if she mispronounces a word I'll say "wow I remember my first time learning English" and it's an established joke between us both. But if someone I went on one date with or knew far less said the EXACT same thing, I'd just be offended and back off. So much of love language isn't just immediate preferences, it's shaped by a ton of time and communication. These two are so incompatible
i don't get why people keep using shayn's love language against him like wanting verbal validation is a bad thing. just because it's not something you like doesn't mean it's a personality flaw.
@@n08itches Every time we see them together even when Natalie wasn't roasting him, he was demanding compliments. There's this really toxic scene where they meet up with the other couples at the honeymoon resort and after it all ends he gets really aggressive questioning why Natalie didn't say how amazing he was to everyone at the party and you see Natalie's visible discomfort.
@@n08itches verbal validation isn’t a bad thing, but CONSTANT verbal validation is exhausting. while not always, i think a common reason a person needs constant, round-the-clock compliments and validation is because they aren’t very secure in themselves and don’t love themselves very much and someone else’s love can’t make up for that. it’s just mentally taxing. tldr: saying “hey, sometimes i need some words of affirmation and a compliment or two because it makes me feel good” is different from saying “hey, i need to be complimented and affirmed multiple times throughout the day, after almost anything i do, everyday, to feel loved by you”
You need watch Love is Blind:Japan. It’s a world of a difference, all of the contestants on that show are much more mature, self aware, ready to find themselves, and get married. It’s not focused on the hardcore sexual aspect the American version keeps pushing…AND the drama is much less. PLUS, the men are way more respectful to the women…no ass grabbing on the first meet, they bow to each other….the culture is so different…
That’s way different than how people actually act when they’re dating in Japan, Japanese women do tend to be shy, but culturally they actually expect some groping or they think you don’t like them.
Unpopular opinion: I think if you start talking to someone with the intention of dating/marrying you shouldn’t talk to other girls/guys anymore. And to call this mindset toxic just shows me that people don’t wanna take their time to get to know people one by one but just try everyone out (if that makes sense). This dating culture is toxic in my eyes but yeah… you do you I guess
Question. Do you mean all people of the opposite gender? Or just people you have intentions of dating. One is weird but not nessesarily toxic. The other is very toxic
@@sonoskay id imagine the answer to your first question depends on the sexuality of the people in question... in any case what they're saying is if you're trying to date or marry someone, don't interact romantically with other people.
@Crappy Old Account that is the most charitable way to read that. Yes. But not only is jealousy pretty common, some people think it's a virtue. Some people legitimately think men and women can't be "just" friends.
16:23 i aslo feel like shes maybe also pissed because he thought she was a different girl an then proceded to say "ah thats who i was hoping for" and you dont need to be commited to someone for something like that to really hurt, esspecially if you and them have expressed you're interested in eachother
I’m super disappointed you don’t point out how manipulative he was and how much he gaslighted Natalie. Shane also has huge red flags when it comes to anger and violence. This is one video I just can’t agree with.
He did point it out but without using the words gaslighting or manipulative or such, but he did mention it?! Did you see the show yourself? Because in this video you are right- I can’t see him being violent..
The title of the video is literally “Man ruins marriage by throwing a temper tantrum(AKA MANIPULATION)” it’s sort of implied and built up for a reveal of that in the second half
He literally ruined the relationship by being soooo insecure that he needed constant reassurance. Then he blamed HER for feeling like he wasn't good enough. He needs therapy. Hes a good guy, but he needs to be more secure in himself
He probably doesn't need therapy. For some people words of affirmation is their love language. And Natalie was constantly putting him down. Them not giving each other what the other needs is already not going to work out but actively doing the opposite only makes it worse
@@rebia5542 But she DOES affirm him and she DOES talk about how great he is and blah blah blah, he’s just upset that it’s not 24/7 every morning, noon, and night. He cant handle a single “Ahaha your forehead is big joke” without shutting down
Glad to hear other people share my love language of hating on someone to show affection. Some people weren't brought up with the typical gushy parents and it can be hard to expect someone to change their way of communication. That being said, I think it's selfish to go into a show about forming a lifelong connection when you need to work on yourself first. Shayne needs constant validation to keep his ego, which is tiring for any partner, even if words of affirmation is their preferred communication choice. Natalie should have came in more sure of herself before looking for love. She allowed a stronger, louder personality to often diminish her say in things and she took the brunt of most of Shayne's tantrums. She should've walked away at the first encounter when Shayne said he was leaving rather than communicating like an adult. But, finding love is a learning process that leads to you finding yourself. I hope the two grew from the experience. All the relationships on the show this season were pretty toxic. I hope you talk about Danielle and Nick soon. Those two were a serious mess 🙃🙃
@@s.stevens4520 It was her actively insulting him that’s the issue. Leo even went over this in the video : / They have different ways of expressing affection. Some people don’t want their partner to mock them 24/7 or joke when they’re trying to be genuinely affectionate. Out of all the bad behaviour from Shayne him ‘fishing’ for compliments is not the problem.
@@ByAzuraByAzuraByAzura thank you, I was looking for this. People were acting like she didn’t have a single flaw in the relationship just because Shane’s triangle in the pods overshadowed everything.
If it was an issue where Natalie read too much into her interactions with Shane than yeah, but it's not really a bad thing to be mad when a guy already calls you He's number one and tells you that he's going to choose you to be his girlfriend, she had every right to be upset. And that we're turn around. "Why are you mad? You're my number one."
One thing I think with Natalie, is that I don't think she expects a partner not to make mistakes at all: I think there are more reasonable and less reasonable mistakes to make in a relationship. A reasonable mistake is maybe picking out a food that your partner doesn't like, especially when you don't know each other that well. Making emotionally immature mistakes becomes less reasonable at a certain age. You don't tell someone something as dramatic as you hate them and they're the worst thing that happened to them within a month of meeting. If he thinks he should just be able to apologize for something that dramatic and potentially hurtful, then what is he willing to say to her in 6 months? in 2 years? He's going to keep losing his temper frequently because he has poor tolerance of things not going his way. Additionally, there's nothing wrong with positive affirmations, but he seems to want them so frequently that he comes off as needy, self-absorbed, and dare I say it, narcissistic.
the random Shane laughs throughout this video were * Chef's kiss * also, the pictures of all Shane's crazy faces was genius! PLEASEEEE make that part of your background for a few more videos - it's high art - literally
I feel like I’ve yet to see anyone mention how when Shane mistakes Natalie for Shaina, he says “I was hoping it was you.” Like sorry??? I think that’s the worst part if he’s been telling Natalie that she’s his #1 but was hoping you were the other girl.
I feel like love is blind proves that people can’t build an emotional connection without physical attraction because most of the people who stay together in the show happened to be attracted to each other AS WELL as liking each other in the pods.
As one of the 3 people who likes Natalie, I feel like it's not fair to blame her for falling too hard to fast because literally everyone does it and it's low-key the point of the pods 😭 She just needs to work on her decision making skills bc I could've told her Shane was a horrible decision LONG before the finale
Nope just because everybody does it, doesn’t mean it’s right. If you have to compare: Iyanna had to hear that Jarette proposed to someone else and even though she had strong feelings for mandem. She still was mature about it and understanding and guarding her heart a bit more. Natalie was on 2 dates was gaslighted and love bombed and still went forward with it. Natalie is naive yes, genuine and vulnerable yes. But she’s also inconsiderate and mean. Shane deserved it tho.
Speak for yourself. Everyone does not fall to hard too fast. Not even close. He's not responsible for her being so intense. Especially since he doesn't know ANYthing about her in the pods section of the show.
No one's blaming her for falling too fast, the problem I have with her is she had a little meltdown because he didn’t immediately know her voice from one sentence when he’s only spoken to her twice and never actually met her. There’s falling too fast, and then there’s being extremely insecure and manipulative. Shane *could* be adorable and sweet but he’s an immature tool, but he freely admits it at least. Natalie comes off as adorable and sweet but she’s clearly pretty toxic herself if you have any experience at all with people like her. I don’t like Shane but I’ll take the toxicity that’s obvious rather than someone who hides how manipulative they are behind tears.
Also the person who put his veneers in did him DIRTY!!! Those teeth are WAY too big and also why do they point outward??? He paid so much money for yee yee teeth
I don't agree with you about Natalie, for the most part. I'm much more on her side than you are, personally. I do have to agree with one of your points about her, though. When she said Shane was raising his voice, and he wasn't. I've been there, when I'm trying to explain my feelings about whatever, I get accused of yelling sometimes. Even when I am making a conscious effort to speak softly. I admit I am autistic, and maybe there's some sort of social cue I'm missing, or something I'm failing to perceive, but it's something that frustrates me. Other than that, though, I'm much more on her side here. I enjoyed hearing what you had to say though and it gave me a lot to think about. I'd love to see what you have to say about the reunion!
I get that sometimes too and I think it comes from people not communicating what they mean effectively. Like if I'm mad and use an angry tone but don't raise my voice people sometimes say don't yell and it's like I'm not yelling I just sound angrier. I wonder if that's what she meant or if she was truly gaslighting him.
@@RaroHi that's what I mean, he could definitely be scaring her and seeming aggressive without raising his voice and yelling and maybe that's what she meant but the easiest way to express it is saying he yelled at her. Idk them facial expressions definitely haunt my dreams 😅
I think the blind part of the dating actually helps Shayne.. he has those crazy *lights on, nobodys home* look in his eyes. Combined with his creepy laugh, I think from first impressions girls would run and hide after looking into those eyes and having a laugh together.. I'm a dude and he creeps me tf out. Mix those features with the weird ass "so what you wearing over there?" Evesham creepy.
Natalie got a really weird edit and Shane misunderstood her so often. She was clearly head over heels for him, but she expressed it in more of a flirty, push and pull kind of way. And she seemed really reluctant to express affection in front of the cameras. All of that is totally understandable! But Shane seemed to expect Natalie to fawn over him, and do it publicly. He probably is used to that given the type of fratty guy he maybe used to be. Their styles were very different and they could have grown to understand that about each other, but the time and pressure made it impossible.
The only thing I disagree with is making fun of his laugh. We shouldn’t make fun of people for being happy just because it doesn’t sound conventional. He can’t control it, and if he does it makes it really sad that he has to filter and focus on his laugh rather than just being in the moment.
I remember an old TV show called Ally McBeal where a woman dropped a guy she was dating because he has a goofy laugh. It may seem unfair but, if it annoys you, you don't have to tolerate it. Is it superficial? Sure I give you that, but I couldn't hear that laugh, it will drive me crazy.
Bro I'm a fairly new subscriber, probably like 6 months now, but I never catch your videos to leave a comment high enough up. I just want to say man you're funny I love your channel, but beside that your intelligent and articulate. I love the way you respond to the vegan gains videos. That was hilarious. You have such a great outlook on life and such a cool way of approaching things. Keep it up
I’m so grateful that I’m happily married. Granted it’s my second (much happier) marriage. However, if I had to start dating again I see shit like this. I would just stay single and hold stock in personal massagers.
I feel like you’re being a little too harsh on Natalie, calling her toxic. I feel like it’s fair to maybe call her a little naive but I feel like her reaction to Shayne mistaking her for someone else is justified because Shayne told her from the beginning that she was his number 1 and that she should concentrate on just him, so she probably didn’t even expect that Shayne was even actively talking to someone else as much as they did. Considering this I completely understand that she would feel shocked and sad in that situation. Most importantly how he reacted when it happened was just incredibly scary and off. His reaction was completely uncalled for and manipulative.
But you didn’t address Natalie’s behaviour before that. I agree with Leo, 2 dates and you’re inlove putting high expectations on a person. No communication about boundaries and expectations but you assume things, setting up your partner for failure. Then the way she treated him in Mexico after he told her words of affirmation are important to him. Natalie really gave me mean girl vibes and it seems Shane’s horrible gas lighting and temper over shadowed Natalie’s poor communication skills and unfairly high expectations.
Obviously, you are entitled to your own opinion, however that doesn’t mean that this ISNT a bad take of their relationship. Listen, some of the things Natalie did could be portrayed as questionable, or iffy, BUT TO STRETCH it and to call her toxic like she’s on the same toxicity level as Shane is pushing it.
Yeah this is the first one of your videos I've thought was a really bad take, honestly. She isn't "just as bad". He DID lead her on, and she had every right to call him out on that. There's this weird culture of "you aren't allowed to be sad that I'm flirting with other girls just because you're not officially my girlfriend" and that's B.S.. Being sad and feeling let down and expressing that is NOT toxic.
yeah honestly I'm disappointed, he seemed to be really bias towards Natalie. Someone else said it seems like he let his own personal experiences get in the way of his critique, and honestly I agree.
How exactly did he lead her on? She can be his number one without being his only. The entire point of the show is to date multiple people. She fell harder for him and first. That's real life for you. She's also allowed to be hurt that he wants to talk to other people. He simply didn't understand why she was as hurt as she was because she knows she isn't gonna be the only one he could be interested in. He handled the conflict poorly but he wasn't wrong.
Shayne//Natalie gives me MAJOR Mr. Peanutbutter//Diane energy. Shayne is obv very friendly and has major extroverted energy, but it’s a mask for someone insecure who can’t take accountability for how they mess up. Diane//Natalie is the one constantly trying to understand their partner and apologizing, giving ground when she really should be giving him a reality check and not saying sorry.
Whew, bullet missed. That dude is a trauma creator who's missed his chance to unite with a perfectionist & recreate my former toxic marriage, lol. This was heavy & overflowin in big baby juice and healthy relationship advice, thank you SixteenLeo, this was a good watch! ♡ I agree with ya, man. Looking good, too, man!
i have trigeminal neuralgia and had the worst attack ever yesterday. i feel asleep listening to this video. it really helped me distract from the pain. so thanks! ❤ it was very relaxing somehow. im rewatching now cuz i felt asleep trough half of it 🙊
I'm a positive affirmation person too and I'll say, aslong as a chick says "i love you" without me saying it first, or "you look handsome today" or "i miss you" etc. I'm happy as can be. I dont prod them into doing it though, maybe hint a little sometimes but alot of relationships i've been in have lacked that kind of verbal communication. Makes you feel like you're not the best choice or as if you're doing something wrong at times. But Shayne is HUGELY OVERKILL with it.
I do agree with Natalie that love can only go so far. A lot of the things people talked about in their own lives in the comments on the Shake video are perfect examples. And yeah, I do agree that this is mostly just a bad match. But at the same time I do think Shane has some very real issues that need to be sorted out for a relationship to really work in the future. Natalie seems mostly like she’s just super whigged out and just out of her element in this whole thing and just struggling to handle all this. It is really weird she didn’t tell her parents about anything until the last minute, though. No clue why she’d do that.
As someone who comes from a strict/conservative Asian household such as Natalie's, I can see why she was hesitant about sharing this sort of information with her parents until the last minute. Conservative parents would have preferred for a "normal" relationshp - i.e. meeting at school, work, etc. - and this show is anything BUT normal. In Natalie's mind, if she went onto the show and walked out without a fiancee, I don't think she would have said anything. Essentially, "no harm, no foul". Since she walked out with a fiancee, she was already in too deep for her parents to say no, though her mom did not like the idea of her being on this program, she most likely silently put up with it because it was too late by that point. But also, even if she did tell them, I think she still would have gone ahead and came onto the show anyways. Natalie is their daughter, and they're obviously going to be very worried about her no matter what, especially when her mom specifically says, "she does a lot of crazy things", which, to me, a fellow Asian American daughter, was code for Natalie being the more rebellious daughter (quick note, but Natalie also has a sister). That's just personally how I read the whole situation as, however, I could be totally wrong. Now, I'm not condoning her behavior, but I can totally see how she thought it was okay to not tell them.
@@aznmochibunny Ah, that's understandable. Telling parents about life stuff must be particularly scary/nerve wracking in such circumstances. Thanks for the explanation.
I REALLY disagree with making the decision at the alter...I mean I get it, for the dramatic effect. But I'm not about to bother my family and friends to come to a wedding that I'm about to end in a "No, I'm sorry."
