One of the hardest things to come to terms with as an adult. That one of your parents doesn't love you. It's hard as a kid, too, but you don't have much context to measure it by at that age, and life is so fast paced as a teenager that you can sort of fill the void with other stuff, ignore it, pretend that it isn't real, that all parents are like that, that it will change as you grow. And then one day you become an adult and the void is bigger now, harder to ignore, and you are running out of things to fill it with. Then you are left with moments like this, where you realise that's all there ever was and all there ever could be, and there is nothing that can be done about it.
Heartbreaking. The acting, writing & directing in this film should be studied and cherished. We need more films with this level of passion & honesty made today.
Probably one of the most significant clips from one of the most powerful films made. For a very few minutes we see genuine vunerability and regret, and some answers for so much of the pain felt and inflicted by so many men. A powerful resource and message, dare you share it.. Nice one Trumpets.
If you enjoyed this film. Watch Once We’re Warriors. A very famous movie among Kiwis and those who’ve been to NZ that is extremely like this movie. Electrifying, raw, and realistic movies this one and the Kiwi one
I watch this every so often to remind myself that men who abuse women can’t love, just like their fathers. This should be required viewing in domestic assault counseling sessions.
Amazing scene. Ray Winstone at his absolute finest. I used this scene as part of a Film Studies presentation when I was studying at university. Addendum: University of Western Sydney (1999)
Ray is exceptional in this film. This is as good a piece of acting as you will ever see. An amazing scene in a powerful film. “Why didn’t you ever love me” How many men have felt this way about the people in their lives...
@@flash_flood_area This scene is about men, in particular fathers and sons. It’s in fact an autobiographical account of Oldman’s own relationship with his father. I as a son relate, and this is a rare example on film of a working class man expressing his feelings. This isn’t about daughters or women, so don’t try shoehorn them in. Give it the respect it deserves.
@@AlexDeLarge77 Sorry to hear, and sorry that you think lack of parental love is a gender specific experience. Btw, I've been watching the very popular Bates Motel series, and it's full of working class male characters openly expressing their feelings.
A landmark film. And this is one of the best scenes in it. Interesting... it may be Gary Oldman's best--and he's not even in it. This scene perfectly explains why Ray is the way he is. More people should see this excellence in cinema.
I have been in this situation at the end of a high just listening to someone spill their guts out to you and you can't process it or find the right words. Phenomenal fucking acting. Genius
Here it is. The real reason Ray beats Valerie... and everyone else. Including himself, finally. This scene stops you cold. Big props to everyone involved.
This is bar none the best scene in the film, it makes sense of everything that's happening. It shows that as foul and brutal as Ray was, there was a reason for it. In the end he was a human being, he just wanted his father's love and respect and he never got it :( Hate breeds more hate, anger breeds more anger.
Incredible acting from both Winstone and Foreman in this. Foreman doesn't want to hear it, there's no real friendship there. Winstone is totally alone. Brutal scene...
I thought the opposite. This scene reveals the true friendship between the two, where earlier on in the film they just seem like two coked up creeps hanging out. The fact that Foreman's character says "It ain't when he died though, is it?" shows that he's actually got a grasp of what went on. Plus he doesn't laugh at the point the story gets serious. I think you totally misread it. Brutal scene nonetheless
Watching this I kind of felt like they are genuine friends, Foreman is just sitting there thinking that Ray has become just like his dad, always pissed, always in the pub, abusive to his own family, can't show love. And rather than tell him that he has become just like his dad; he's just listening and humouring him in order to let him vent, perhaps hoping that it will be some sort of cathartic experience for him; so that he can work towards putting it behind him and moving on. Thinking on it perhaps he is a little bit intimidated by Ray as well; adding to why he might not want to tell Ray that he has become like his father.
Watched this for the first time last night, been putting it off for years as I knew its brutal. This scene blew me away, the idea that trauma follows trauma is incapsulated in this scene. This film is a masterpiece, and difficult to watch.
As a recovering addict, I recognise it too. There is a great deal of self pity here, it's perfectly portrayed by Winstone in a beautiful performance. 'Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink'. Addicts will always try to shift the narrative to excuse their behaviour. Gaslighting, manipulating, lying, it's all in the repertoire. Anything to justify or convince themselves that they're entitled to drink or use. It's Hell and this film is a brilliantly clear lens on it. Thanks to Gary Oldman and all involved x
It explains his behaviour but doesn’t excuse it. His dad likely had his own story for why he was a useless, abusive failure of a man. This scene is very powerful and it really moved me - the tragedy though is that it doesn’t move Ray to try to break the cycle. By the end of the film he’s learned nothing, and nothing will change.
