Reacting to Trans Fails & Confessions | Ft.  

funny trans thing: I'm non-binary (afab), and I'm one of the enbies that dresses very androgynous/masculine. I get called sir at restaurants pretty much all the time. My family's pretty unaccepting and gets really pissed whenever it happens. So one time we went to Applebee's and the waiter, who was obviously gay, asked me what I'd like to drink and referred to me as sir. I just answered and inwardly celebrated, but my mom got mad. She goes, "Excuse me, that's my daughter!" I rolled my eyes and just said, "It's fine, I'm not bothered" My mom goes, "Well I'm bothered, you're a girl!" The waiter deadass looked my mom in the eyes and said, "I'm sorry sir, I couldn't tell" Side note: my mom refused to tip him, so I gave him 20 bucks on the way out

I was wearing my Non-binary bracelet and coming back from a pride event. And I wasn't out to my Uncle. And this bracelet was the flag colors and had 'Non-binary' on it. I forgot to take it off and he saw it. He said "What's your name and what are your pronouns?" I cried.

MY BOYFRIEND IS THE SPRITE AND COUSIN STORY 🥺

I’m the one who had the mall coming out, I showed this to my mum and she cried that you guys loved supportive mums.

Instructions unclear Potato fell out of table leg

Your and Shaaba's relationship honestly is so wholesome and cute and it makes me so happy.

As a non-binary human, I love that look of confusion/waffling on maam/sir so much. It's the closest to being correctly gendered I ever get.

People incorrectly correcting themselves happens pretty often with me (I'm genderfluid and only out to my friends). Right now, my hair is really short and I look and act masculine. I usually wear baggy shorts and shirts as well. Whenever my family and I go out, people usually say 'son' or 'sir' instead of 'miss' and I love it, even if I'm female or enby that day. It really sucks when my parents put a bunch of emphasis on 'daughter' to correct them. Story: Once when we had gone out, a waiter had called me 'Sir' and my parents did the 'daughter' thing. The waiter just smiled and glanced at me (my face is blank whenever my parents 'correct' people) and gave me a nod and returned to taking out orders. Twenty or so minutes later, he comes back out with our food and calls me 'sir' again. Left and came back with refils, and called me 'Mr'. My parents were a bit mad and kept correcting him. He came back with the check and when my parents and brother were looking away, he tapped his chest pocket, which had a folded up trans flag. Parents took me back home but the waiter gave me a fistbump before we left. That man was a legend and he made me feel a whole lot happier for that week.

'Mission successful but very stressful' That needs to be on a t-shirt.

One of the stories reminded me of something that happened to me. A few years ago I had a test in school and I had gotten so used to my name that I wrote it on the test. Gladly it was one of my favorite teachers class and when she was returning the graded papers she quietly asked if it was mine. I was embarrassed but obviously said yes. After the class ended she asked me to stay for a bit and asked if I wrote the name myself or if it was someone else bullying me (if I remember correctly it was a smaller test so the students graded each others tests and the teacher looked them over). I then explained the situation and that I had gone by my name for a while and gotten really used to it and accidentally wrote it down. She was really supportive and asked if I wanted her to call me by my new name in class. It made me really happy. After that I explained my situation to other teachers I had and they all were very nice about it and even told other staff to call me by my new name. One of the teachers actually said that she had thought so when I told her I was trans. Sorry for writing so much, I just got really happy remembering that :)

Forcing your child to wear something is mean and controlling, even if the child is cis (more so if trans... parents usually don't know that until later). For example I hated wearing uncomfortable dresses and jeans, while my brother got to pick what he wanted, just because it aligned with my mom's taste. I liked his style, but those options were not available to me, because it wouldn't "show my figure". Also: Mom nagging me to wear make up was annoying. My brother looked good enough without the extra effort, but I was supposed to put it in? Overdone gender roles, or rather sexism sucks. It's just as bad for boys, I assume (if not worse).

I feel like we need a part two where you reveal the outcomes to all of these stories

ItS funny how binary trans people feel awkward when a waiter or someone is confused by their gender (which is 100% valid) but then I'm like yes be confused my gender is unknowable! I I love when someone can't figure out my gender XD

I had a similar experience to the changing room one except I was with my mom and when the lady told me to go into the women's changing rooms (I'm ftm) my mom just goes "oh yeah, ya know he's getting older now. I don't really need to go with him anymore." And the lady kinda did a double take as I quietly shuffled into the men's changing area.

10:00 I once was in a similar situation. I went to get food and the person behind the counter apparently read me as male because of my clothes and was like "What can I get you, sir?" When I told her what I wanted, she seemed to think she had misgendered me, started to apologize, then got completely confused and eventually settled on "young person". I'm agender and she has no idea that she made my day.

I'm nonbinary and when there is not a unisex or neutral bathroom, I just end up going into the first one I see and the reactions I get sometimes are hilarious. I am AFAB, but very stocky so I pass easily as either when I bind, except for my voice. Therefore, sometimes I'll enter the women's bathroom and the people will freak out at me because there is a man in there and try to make me prove I was born female. Then, sometimes I'll be in the men's restroom and some dude will try to strike up a conversation with me and I have to go wordless or try to lower my voice because the few times I've spoken in men's restrooms everyone in there stops and stares awkwardly. Idk, I just wish there were neutral bathrooms everywhere so I didn't have to deal with it, but it can be very funny sometimes.

I came out to my best friends parents before my own. Before i did, they said i was like another daughter to them. After i came out, they corrected themselves. "Babe! Turns out, we got another son! Our eldest daughters best friend!" "Sweet! Remind me to invite him when i take the boys fishing!" Was the reaction. Her dad takes her brothers fishing every year durring spring break. It was in my sophomore year and they didnt forget to take me fishing with them. Her dad even told someone asking that they stole a friends son for the week.

I feel like if your parent opened your sock drawer and found a ~genitalia~ shaped object, their first thought wouldn't be to know that it was a packer and that you were trans

Here’s the most embarrassing story I’ve got: When I ordered my first packer, I was living in an apartment building. One of my neighbors had the same last name as me and this was the first of many packages that would end up getting mixed up in their mail. They made the mistake of opening it (which is illegal in America) then taped it back up and gave it to the front office who called me to tell me they received my package. They tried to apologize for the neighbor opening it, but needless to say, even when we had mix ups down the line, none of my other packages ended up being opened. I was still mortified at the time, but I can laugh about it now.

I once stole some of my sister's clothes, because I wanted to know what it feel like to be a girl. This was six years ago. I was born Male and I am Non-binary. I dressed in her clothes, but it was late so I passed out on my bed. My mom found me because I had disappeared into my room earlier than usual. My mom didn't freak out, but I was super scared. She made me go into the bathroom and dress back into some of my own clothes. She didn't give the clothes back to my sister, they sort of just 'disappeared.' She also didn't tell my sister, but she did tell my eldest brother because he had a friend do the same thing and mom probably wanted someone a little more mature to help her understand what was going on. I didn't know I was non-binary at the time (I didn't know that it was an option), so I didn't really understand why I did it at the time either. I was 12. After that night, we never spoke of it again, until I came out as non-binary four years later. I didn't figure out that I was non-binary until I had a major identity crisis after performing a monologue as one of my female classmates for drama class. We all were assigned partners to perform our monologues as each other.

Insert obligatory "the last time I was this early I thought I was a girl" comment

How I'm gonna come out to my mom: "Skedaddle skedoy your daughter's a boy" over text cause why not

Aww man, some of these coming out stories are really good. I just had 8 shots of espresso and then decided to word vomit at my parents that I was trans.

You're so parent-y in this video and I love it. Like "Did it go okay?" "Well done for the award" I melted

I want to thank you for creating your content! I'm a highschool teacher and councellor with little to no knowledge about trans people but sexuality is a thing that is so common, I try my best to understand them all as well as I possibly can. As someone who's bisexual, I do feel comfortable talking about it but I can still learn a lot from the trans community, how they feel, what I should do, absolutely shouldn't do and how to make them feel the most at ease and of course: make them feel vallid.

I felt that hug. I'm sweating just looking at them. By the way, have you heard of virtual pride? Since pride is cancelled this year because of lockdown, @fx.kiara.fx on tiktok came up with the idea of making a virtual pride lasting the whole of June. It will be happening here, TikTok, instagram, snapchat and a few other places. It would be so cool if you could get involved!! There are a few people who are co-organising it but I'd suggest checking out Kiara's TikTok or DM her on insta (shes @fx.kiara.fx and both) to find out more since I don't know every detail.

I'm mtf and maybe a year after being out, I was shopping with my family at Walmart for dat good cheap shit. I wasn't on blockers or hormones at the point because we couldn't afford it and my voice was deep at shit. But to my joyful surprise, when I went to the changing area, she pointed me to the women's rooms with a smile. But the second I said thank you, her face soured, but I didn't care; I actually passed for the first time!

Also, about the changing room one, my dad once said to me I should go into the womens' one with my mens' clothes (I'm FTM and I was out). I asked why, and he said that he didn't want me to see...stuff.. in the mens'. I replied with, "What weird-ass changing rooms are you going to?" He laughed and let me go into the mens' ever since! hehe

Here's another flashback: In the weeks after getting my new IDs with my new name and M gender on it, I wanted to buy some liquor at the grocery store. Note that I was around 24 y/o at the time and in Quebec, CA, legal drinking age is 18. But, you know, I looked 12 like most of us. Honestly I was more than happy to show her my brand new Driver's license we she asked for ID... but then she said she was not convinced. So I showed her my health care card which also has picture and birtg date. I lost my cool when she said she still wasn't convinced and that she could not sell my alcool. I told her "do you want me to go get my birth certificate? Cuz I have it in the car!" (I had just visited an institution to have them change my name in their files). She finally asked the superviser and that person just looked at my ID and said "yeah, it says 1992, that's fine". Why it gotta be such a fight when I got proper ID???

My little sister came out as trans shortly before Christmas. She was three years old, which is insanely young, but everyone in our family had basically always known (she acted so girly). My mom, being a total hero, spent all night sewing a unicorn horn onto the rocking horse “Santa” was going to give her for Christmas. Three years later, she still hasn’t noticed that it wasn’t originally a unicorn. And she’s still trans. And I love her.

I live for that tank top.

I have a small story that 10:12 reminded me of I’m out to some of my family, but they aren’t supportive. They’re not UNSUPPORTIVE, they’re just stuck in the whole “it’s a phase you’ll grow out of it” thing. I was getting my nice short hair trimmed because I was getting a quarantine mane. We had to wear face masks into the salon, so most of my face was covered. The lady checking us in referred to me as “him”. Even though I’m nonbinary and use they/them pronouns, if I HAD to choose between he/him and she/her I’d DEFINITELY go with he/him. So, naturally, I was feeling a little (okay, a lot) excited that I wasn’t passing as my birth gender. And then my mom (I love her she’s amazing), who I’m out to but she’s in denial, goes and kills my happiness with an “oh, this is my daughter.” The lady checking us in was super apologetic and I didn’t know how to tell her that she did something great and made my day because even though she incorrectly referred to me, she didn’t use the pronouns for my assigned gender. So yeah I’m a little more dysphoric lately. Sorry for the long rant thing, thanks for reading if you made it this far, I love you guys 🖤🏳️‍🌈🖤

One day I forgot to change the ytb account on the family computer after watching one of your videos (luv ur content). The day after my mom came into my bedroom (she had obviously seen a video of yours in the recommendations, nearly cried and started telling me it was ok to be trans and so on but i was just like "no I'm not" because supporting LGBTQ's community does not always mean that you're a part of it. It was really akward and it took me two hours to explain her I was straight but at least we had a great conversation about genders and sexual attractions 😰. (Greetings from Belgium)

I work for a clothing brand. Once, shortly after I got hired, a friend of mine came and asked my boss "is Milan here now?" And my boss was super confused, she came to me asking "who is Milan? Someone is asking for him". That's how I came out to my coworkers.

I just want to tell whoever is reading this that you are loved and valid and freaking valuable. If you're having a rough time, it's going to get better. It always will. That's the crazy thing about life... So yeah. You're important and I love you :)

When I was in eighth grade and cis-passing as male, I was involved in a program in my school where eight graders helped out sixth graders. I was in a small group with three eighth grade girls and we would do activities with a sixth grade class. Apparently, one of the girls in my group who knew I was trans accidentally misgendered me in front of some sixth graders. Later, when we were giving instructions for an activity to the class, one girl raised her hand when I asked if there was any questions. She said in front of the whole class, "We thought you were a boy." I just laughed nervously and said "I am". Later I pulled that girl aside and admitted that I was a trans boy.

i would’ve came faster but my cat was attackin me

I'm nonbinary and I had a string of events leading to telling my mother... I said "I'm nonbinary" She said "But you're a girl- oh, I guess I shouldn't say that" And then she proceeded to accept me slowly and slowly be open to my pronouns She already knew I was bi and she was cool with it and proud but me being nonbinary was iffy I know she's trying to be accepting though

Shaaba: at least you didn’t use a potato Jamie: a potato!!? Me: sounds like something I would do.

I am 14 and im ftm i came out to my parents at 13, didnt go so well and they now use female pronouns 10x more and watching u helps me accept that not everyone accepts that your trans. Not the happiest coming out but i wanted to share it with you guys.(if you can you can share this in a video 😁)

At like 6:54 u two are so cute acting like proud parents for this person who won an award at school

awkward story, but still not out: I was at the museum with my dad and younger brother, and we were going between the two parts of a NASA exhibit when I realised I had to go to the bathroom. I told my dad I was going to the bathroom and the museum staff man next to us looked up as I headed off, saying "Oh, the male toilets are that way" and pointing in the opposite direction I was going. Now, I've been coming to this museum since I was like three, I knew exactly where the bathrooms were and although I was dressed as masculine as I could manage, I wasn't confident enough to use the male toilets yet. So I just kinda blinked at him and then kept walking while freaking the fuck out, because a) I just passed publicly for one of the first times, and b) holy shit my dad and brother must have heard him. I went and did my business, came back and he apologised profusely to me, while I was just kinda going "aaaahh no it's okay, don't worry" and he was saying "no, it's not okay, I'm really sorry". It was incredibly awkward. I'm still not out. My brother still teases me about it because he's an asshole. another story: I met my friend's boyfriend for the first time at a party. I wasn't even dressed that masc, but when she was introducing him to everyone over the beer pong table, he pointed to me and the female friend I was leaning on, and said "boyfriend or brother?" everyone broke down laughing (again, I'm not out to most of them but we're all hella queer) and I said "both". he heard my voice and started apologising lmao.

"Mission successful, but very stressful" Yes. I love it. This is my motto now. My life is a mission and always stressful

"even if we were twins 4 years apart"

I relate to the whole "hating wearing dresses" thing. I hated wearing dresses before I came out. It's why I hated concert band season in school (mostly spring semester; fall semester was marching season when we had to play at football games), because I had to wear the dress. And trust me when I say I'd get out of that thing as quickly as possible once the concerts were over! Also, Chili's is an American thing. It's a fast-casual chain where you can get anything from burgers and fries to quesadillas to even steak and ribs.

I'm coming out to my mom next week, I really can't wait Update: the other day my my siblings told me that my mom told them I might be trans and seemed totally okay with it?!?!?! This is an exciting turn of events Update So I told her, and she told me she still loves me and wasn't kicking me out, but she wouldn't say she accepts me and wouldn't say she loved me as her daughter... So not the worse outcome but I feel like she doesn't really believe me and she's acting as if nothing changed

people will see my long hair and dress, they say "ma'am" but once they notice my stuble or voice they say "sorry sr". i then tell them "no you had it right the first time." it's kinda obvious I'm feminine.

i came out to my school today. after being so scared for months i finally did it!! it went really well so far haha (trans ftm btw lol)

i recently became very close friends with a ftm i’ve watched your videos for awhile but once he came out to me fully i have kept up with all your uploads i am from a very small town and sadly am ignorant to most of it but your videos have helped me understand better. :)

I agree, Shaaba - my dad is so oblivious and in his own world that I'm 95% sure he wouldn't notice if a realistic packer was staring at him from my sock drawer XD

One of the stories reminds me of something I experienced a long time ago. This was about 20 years ago, when there wasn't as much awareness about trans people. I was working in the women's clothing department at a department store and a trans woman came up to the counter where I was working and asked me if she was allowed to go into the women's changing room to try on the outfits she'd picked out. The whole situation was very confusing to me. Clearly, I had never thought this situation out ahead of time because back then, this was the type of situation that most people would almost never find themselves in. It hadn't occurred to me that someone who came in wearing women's clothing and who was wanting to try on women's clothing would have to ask for permission to use the women's changing room. So just by her asking, it suddenly made me think that maybe there was a reason why she wouldn't be allowed to and I just wasn't aware of it. So it kind of had me panicking a bit lol. I ended up telling her that I wasn't sure what the store's policy was, but that I personally had no problem with her using the women's changing room. I also thought about the fact that it would probably cause a much bigger scene for her to try on women's clothing in the men's changing room(and probably just be really awkward for her in general) than to just let her use the women's changing room, regardless of the store's policy. It ended up not being that big of a deal anyway because it turned out that there wasn't even anyone else using the changing room at the time. I'm just glad that I had enough common sense at such a young age to not make an already awkward situation any more awkward than it needed to be lol.

I love your relationship! It's so sweet and I love the on screen jokes you let the world see

So I was playing Tetris whilst watching this video, and when you were reacting to the one where the guy had to come out to the whole school, an ad on Tetris popped up with really opera-like-dramatic music. Perfect timing.

not a fail in my eyes bc it was so hilarious but once at a lgbt+ youth club, we were all getting up from sitting on the floor to get snacks, and someone suddenly clutched at their pant leg to presumably catch their rogue packer and squeaked "MY BALLS JUST DROPPED!" hahahahaha

I (FTM) was hanging out in my college dorm’s lounge (all women’s dorm) with some friends. My packer got loose while I was doing homework and it fell from my shorts when I stood. . . (It all went well. My friends and entire dorm was super supportive and used he/him for me and my proper name. They also switched back when my family came to visit because I wasn’t out to my dad yet)

I'm a not out and when I ordered my first to binder my mom opens the package thinking it was for her, she texted me and asked me why I'd ordered a booby torture device

Turns out that I didn’t need to come out as trans my whole family has been thinking that I’m trans Yesterday my grandma said you like being my grandson right and I just silently said yes she went ok and went back to cooking most stressful minute of my life

When I told my mom I was trans she literally said “no you’re not”.

(First: i love your vids

That moment when you realize 9:30 - 12:00 are both of your stories

Shaaba gives me hope that someday I’ll be able to find someone who loves me for me as all the genders i am when i am them without it being a big deal. She makes me hopeful that someone can love me equally as any gender on my spectrum without feeling like my partner enjoys one gender more than another. Shaaba shows me that people can love people for who they are as people, and be attracted to them, regardless of the junk they’ve got in their swim trunks. (I’m fluid if that clears up any of the confusing concepts in this comment)

i’m not on T but H&M has been great abt their dressing rooms, as long as i’m shopping on the men’s side no one seems to have a problem with me using the men’s dressing rooms! worth a try if anyone’s scared of being turned away like that! (also i swear by their jeans, they’re the best fit i’ve had)

The potato packer SEND me omg also i'm scared i will sign stuff with my name instead of deadname after quarantine because i didnt use that one for weeks

I was just wearing my shirt with the trans flag on it.

AYY IM THE FIRST STORY

Oof- that packer story

I'm non-binary and when I came out to my friend group my bestie was super nice about it (calling me by my preferred name and pronouns), she also came out as bi after me and we were both super happy that we had a safe place with our friends. This year I am doing online school so I wont be able to see her as much as I usually do. Today she called me up and asked me if she could buy me a non-binary pride flag I literally cried and we planned to meet up at our favorite candy shop after it arrives in the mail, little does she know that I made her a painting that has all the bi-pride colors on it (she hasn't told her parents yet so it's like a secret bi-pride flag). I'm so lucky to have her as a bestie and I really hope she likes the painting I made for her.

My favorite way to address a group and be gender inclusive come from the Doctor Who episode “Midnight “ from season 4. “Ladies and gentlemen, and variations there upon.”

I feel like some of those stories are what in french we call “acte manqué” : when you do something by mistake that your subconscious actually wanted you to do. The physical freudian slip if you will :)

today is my dads birthday but he's not home so i spend the rest of my time watching mileschronicles Jammidodger noahfinnce notcorry :) that just shows what a big gay i am

Speaking of packer mishaps. I took mine out to go to the bathroom on a car trip, left it on top of my bag in the packing pouch. Fell asleep for awhile and then I switched seats with my bf's brother. I unknowingly kicked it out of the car when we did. So...somewhere in Kansas is a masho packer...in a farm ditch. Also on that trip my bf (who is also trans and has a binder on, and a little beard) was misgendered at the Denny's but I wasn't? For the record, I'm maybe 3 months on t, just wearing a sports bra and my hair is really shaggy. It was incredibly surreal and sometimes I just don't understand cis people lol.

I lost it at “table leg.” 🤣

The high level of comedy in this totally cured me of crying all over the last thing I watched! Also I love the contrast between Shaaba looking bright and cheery with the yellow chair and then Jamie doing a white guy blend into the wall behind him! lol

Jamie’s face when he hit the fan is incredible

It’s so sad there’s no pride this year, but on the last day of school we are having a car parade. I am going to stick my head out the sunroof of our car and wave a very large pride flag.

"You're channeling your inner Roly" I already love this video

Shaaba said “potato” I thought “aren’t we spuds...?”

To everyone in this comment section with unsupportive parents, I'm your mother now. I love you, you are valid no matter who you are and you are amazing. You can talk to me. 💕🏳️‍🌈

When I was younger I used to not really mind wearing feminine clothes because I have always been really shy and didn't want to upset my mum. Looking back on it now, I barely recognise old photos of me as myself because I only dress masculinely (but I'm not out as trans to anyone but my close friends)

Y’all got any transitioning tips for a NB

I used to cry everytime I had to wear a dress when I was younger (weddings etc) and there’s a picture from an event where I’m in a dress one photo and I look completely miserable and then there’s one from after I changed into jeans and a short sleeve button up and I look *over the fucking moon* and honestly idk how I didn’t figure out i was trans sooner

The last time i was this early i had a different name

gotta say as a nonbinary person that moment of terrified confusion on the faces of cis people working how how to address me is peak gender euphoria

My sibling and I would always wear matching clothes. We're not the only kids my mom had, we're not twins, we just matched all the time and my brother thought it was creepy

I'm a waitress and whenever I'm in doubt abt "sir" or "ma'am" everyone is "love" "what can I get you to drink my love" because I am the biggest ally and I've misgendered someone once and I never wanna make that mistake again.

Gosh you guys are such a cute couple! Like whenever I see a thumbnail and it has both of you I just start smiling! 💖

I ADORE the videos the two of you make together. You are so sweet and wholesome!

Jamie: your channeling your inner Roly Me just got done binging Rolys videos: *screech in piercings*

I love Shaaba’s ‘rainbow points’

Thank you, I did enjoy my sprite that day :3

6:33 Gives a whole new meaning to Jamie's intro...

I was just binging all your videos- yEs, thank youuuuu!

"You know, there are urinal cakes..... donteatthem!"

One of the stories remindes me of something that happend to me once, I had to give in an homework for a class. It got really late, cause I finished around 3 am and I signd the mail with my new name instead of my death name, because I was so exhausted

Thank you sooooo much. Your videos have helped me a lot. I'm FTM and they have made me very happy, and have helped me and given me facts that I needed to know.

My friend is ftm and we were in math class before I knew and he passed his paper forward with his masculine name and after the teacher took it i told him and he said he forgot to put the date and grabbed it from him quickly. that’s how we came out to each other-

You guys are an amazing pair. Watching you two together makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside.

This already looks good! I can't wait to actually watch it.

Yay! y’all did another one!!! I love y’all 🥰

OMFG please I need more of these they're like my favourite thing ever