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I've noticed that women rarely smile in dating profiles - is this more projection on their part and they're mimicking what THEY find attractice in men?
women: "guys are creepy." also women: "he smiled at me, no thanks." women again: "how do i know if he likes me" and again: "i wish hed just give me a sign"
Sure but it shouldn't matter if women are wondering "if he likes me" because it's her "job" if you will to ruminate about romantic connections, and it's his job to decide if he likes her and to initiate action if so.
As a woman, i can say I have passed good looking guys out and about and i always thought it attractive if their eyes met yours and they just gave you a brief smile of friendliness. It wasn't usually a big teeth showing smile though. I think just looking at these photos is entirely different....so it can be a lot to do with context.
Keyword "good looking guys" how about less attractive guys or downright ugly guys? You realise that in the exact same situation you would consider it creepy or it would freak you out.
I knew this most of my life. I realized when I was very young that being super happy didn’t get me anywhere but being more aggressive and boastful in a bragging way did. I used to be jealous of women a bit because I always felt women could basically act however they feel and society embraced it. Especially if they are slightly pretty. I’ve always been a good looking guy, but I couldn’t express genuine happiness. As in just being happy. I had to channel that into pride and boastfulness if I wanted to have a good outcome with relationships. I’ve done it most of my life at this point. I’m in a long term relationship now but I still do the same. I actually find that having the same attitude keeps my partner attracted as well. When I show indifference she tends to seek my approval in things but when I’m overly outgoing and happy in general, she pulls away.
@@beardfistthegoldenone7273 that's the problem. It's become an aggressive low trust society. Been there once a decade for the last 30 years and I've noticed it getting culturally worse every time. This is in the big cities of course.
@Alexander Grace I Thank you so much! One of my close friend who is a married girl, asked me why am I smiling so much... I was shock back then that she literally said, seeing me smiling making me unattractive. I did not understand but after watching this research of yours now I see why. Thank you my friend. From now on, I am gonna smile from inside and show more pride and boast off any time I can without faking of course.
Wow, that sucks for them. An actual happy man is better than a shame filled man. I think it’s important to not care about this. The less you care the better. Be happy if you’re happy.
Watching this video again, maybe the data reveals that women don't like smiling men, but maybe not. The smile of the woman in the picture looks natural and genuine. The smile of the dude in the picture looks forced and unnatural -- the guy they used does not know how to smile on queue. We know that women naturally have higher EQ, which includes a better read on expressions an non-verbal. So the results are just as likely to suggest that women don't like guys with fake, stilted, unnatural smiles -- not smiles per se. They need to redo the study using a picture of a guy who is genuinely smiling to get an accurate result.
Once, at a dance, I was not in the mood to dance at all. I put my back against the wall. I held completely still, poker-faced. I stared above the crowd at a spot on the opposite wall. I let myself sink into a near-trance, feeling the rumble of the speakers. To my surprise, a girl sidled up next to me, her back also against the wall, within arm's reach. I knew this was girl hint-ese for "pay attention to me." Easy to forget that lesson, but calm, stoic poise was more effective than smirking or jumping around or blabbing.
Damn bro, I needed this. I noticed this in my whole life as a jovial loving happy man I am lonely asf and single and people treat me so different in a good way when I act pissed off all the time
I love how you make the videos on actual studies. Makes your advice so much more solid. Could you make a video on when should a man smile to a women? Like, when's the right time to smile?
There’s benefits to smiling if you have a great smile also with dimples, I found out I look intimidating and unapproachable when I don’t smile. It’s a balance I guess.
Cultural notes. Smile 😃 often does not work in the Eastern World. Example. In Russia 🇷🇺, a smile is often treated as suspicious. 🤔 In Asia 🌏, a smile 😃 can be treated as saving face.
Yes, you should definitely smile at women, but only if you're good-looking. If you're ugly, do not smile at them for you will get called out as a creep.
Here is how it works. If a woman is attracted to you then she will put smiling at her in a good light and it will lead to good things. If she is not attracted to you she will put smiling at her in a bad light and it will hopefully lead to nothing instead of leading to bad things.
borderline/bipolar will not like you to not look pleased and happy... they will think you are constantly angry on her lol as they mirror you and can pick every minimal change of mimic
I don't know why but smiling has always worked for me I promise you all that only thing that matters is confidence. People who go to the gym have massive confidence, people who already got women are confident, and those who have money are confident too. Just work on yourself and understand your body, your economic and social situation. That's literally the only thing that will get you women.
It's just a picture so it's a first impression, that's it. Conclusions are misunderstood. So it may apply more to 1st impressions than all the time, it's just superficial context. Don't get the wrong idea guys, scientific communicators often make this mistake
I'm talking to a boy and I absolutely LOVE his smile, it's actually the first thing I notice in men, their smile This boy as such a beautiful smile and his eyes are sooo pretty 🤩 Basically he's face is perfect in my eyes lol I don't know what is going on with my generation but I don't want to be part of it.
What I took from the topic... Is to oozed back the masculinity, by allowing the too nice smiley side to fade somewhat. Thanks, I already feel a positive energy about it.
From my experience women are attracted to me when I'm alone , happy and content. My experience also concludes that's when they want to make me miserable.
If you’re attractive, you can do whatever you want, or not do anything at all, and you’ll always get women. If you’re average or unattractive, it will always be a struggle no matter what you do or don’t do. Maybe you’ll get lucky once a year, maybe you’ll never get any woman at all. That’s it.
While this may be true on average, should you really change yourself based on what makes you attractive to the average person? I'm not going to change myself just to appeal to the lowest common denominator. I will do what I feel is right for me and within my tastes. If you don't like my non-stereotypically attractive traits, you are not the one for me.
Pride is best, but men need to learn to show it with just a face expresion. Pride is essentially shown with combination of little angry and very confident type of face expresion. Like you can get whatever you want at that moment and you know what you are going for. Do not move your gaze if she looks at you aknowledge her look and have a feeling you can get her if you want her in your look. But then again if you are in the top 10% everything works. If you are strange or shy then you are interesting, if you are happy you know how to enjoy yourself, if you are neutral then you are to bored where you are currently at and usually have much more interesting things to do, so in short if you are top 10% women will make a story in their mind why your persona is good for her no matter what you are doing.
for the inexperienced men out there. this is a very non-nuanced, dramatic way of describing overly smiley men. you're absolutely allowed to smile. but dial it down a bit if you're constantly smiling and using it because you're socially anxious.
Should men try to appeal to women who are the baseline? The lowest common denominator? Should women try to appeal to the baseline of men - the lowers common denominator?
Smiling is good for YOU. After this much contemplation, why are you focus on what women "want". They like you if they like you and they don't if they don't.
Exactly what i think. Smiling changes the feelings inside me, makes me feel happy, I will not put a fake angry face and so make me feel unhappy just to please some psychopath. They have to please me, not the reverse.
Bro, it's always about taking this kind of data with a grain of salt when it comes to the context. Social interactions are nuanced. How do we show pride as opposed to "smile" to a woman? That's absurd. In practice, a smile is part of a specific interaction, but that smile should come contextualized as high value. Not appearing overly giddy like a girl. A smirk, some smiles and laugh contextually. If someone is giddy and bubbly like a girl, then their laughs and smiles won't mean as much... BUT, what this kind of research matters THE MOST is JUST for the ATTRACTION PHASE. It's not within a relationship; Surely, inside the relationship you don't want to be too bubbly like a 8 year old girl ALL THE TIME. It's just about the average vibe they get from us. From a picture, how much info do we have? Just one picture. From a 5 minute conversation more data, from a 5 months relationship even more data.
@@lucasblanc1295 maybe. But I am neurotic so I always have to be careful about overthinking. I try to focus more on what feels right because my brain likes to use preparation as a distraction.
rofl true :P , nah its becuase its uncomfortable to refocus your depth onto something super close, aswell as akward if the person looks into your eyes as thats a sign of intimidation, not intimacy
Fellas, if you're happy and wanna smile, do it. Don't worry about what women say they want and don't want. You don't want to be phony and end up attracting girls that are liking a fake you. Like someone else said on here, I'm sure Chad can smile and the girls are fine with it. Stay away from stupid dating apps.
Agreed. These are all basic animal instincts. Women need to evolve the ability to choose WISELY. This ancient strategy of relying on raw animal displays of power is asinine. Just as men need to learn how to discern a 304 from a housewife, even if a 304 is far more outwardly attractive, so do women need to learn to BELIEVE in good men strong enough that it informs their loins what to get wet about. This is simply being a wise and civilized human, instead of an animal who is a slave to their instincts.
I agree, there are not absolutes when it comes to human interactions, many of my friends put on a false display of behaviors and mannerism when picking up girls but many girls can see through that, specially the ones pretending to be though guys but when they get confronted they're cowards, a Lion doesn't need to put on a facade infront of hienas, real confidence comes from control over your emotions, thats where most guys pretending to be something theyre not fail. manipulative people always end up manipulating themselves.
He says smile make you more femenin, but when man shows masculinity girls start to test and try to filter him, but when man acting totally femenin and even joking he's a gay and want to be trans girls switch off the filters and roles are changing, then she trying to be active and attract you, think about this hacks 😄
A male guy who smiles with kindness shows that he wants help and cares not only about himself but giving off positive energy around him. A person that you can trust if you treat him fairly.
@@TrancymindI am like this, there’s a philotimo about it. Then you end up lonely especially in the U.S because in their blood they like to screw you over. Their god is Mamon, the god of money.
@@Teglamen I second that. Being “nice” is ironically shallow and self-serving and likely to make you a target. Being respectful, real and having serious teeth when you need to washes far better. “Nice people” have no fire and no depth. They’re too busy standing for nothing to be taken seriously by anyone.
It's quite funny because I kind of learnt the about the smiling thing when I was 19. I had pretty much been the smiling joker until I had problems with this girl and other mutual friends. Not the point but definitely related to the non masculine way I conducted myself. I felt a bit down, smiled less and as a result this other girl became a bit keen on me. She said I was mature. I knew this couldn't be further from the truth and despite the fact that she meant it as a compliment, it rubbed me the wrong way a bit. I thought it was pretty ironic that I had to be miserable to be attractive to women.
Yeah its really weird how this stuff gets interpreted by girls. When I was 14 I had moved into a new town, which I really hated, I wanted to stay where I lived before. Losing my old friends and being forced into a new school system really made me feel like probably the lowest point in my life. I felt like I didnt fit in there at all and was felt really depressed. How did this effect my attractiveness to girls? Well, guess what, even though I wanted to avoid girls like the plague I actually became the most wanted guy in the class. It was quite a surreal experience, girls wanted to cycle to school together with me, wanted to sit next to me or on my lap even, and even asked me on dates even if I had barely ever said a word to them. All of those advances I refused and rejected, because I really didnt want anything to do with it. After that year I went into therapy and was able to regain my happiness again. After that I still got female attention, but definetly not in the insane amounts as when I felt absolutely miserable.
@@rymreaper funny story that one too, but I guess I'm on the right channel. Had been seeing a girl for 6 months and had done nothing. No hand holding, kissing nothing (right? Wrong? You be the judge). Been on many "dates" and this one night we'd been out and I dropped her back at home. We were in my car and she goes to give me a peck on the cheek and I think she's going for a pash so I turn my head to face her. She pulls away and so do I. I take a few seconds to compose myself and see her freaking out trying to unlock the car door (she was looking for a button you pull up near the window but it was a switch lower on the door). I unlock the door from the driver's side and she runs out and into her house like her life depends on it. I spoke to her a few days later and do you think she regretted the misunderstanding? Nope! Apparently I was in too much of a hurry and had locked her in the car. Remember I had been seeing her for 6 months. I thought the name was appropriate.
I went to a party where I only knew one person so I decided to try an experiment. I didn't dance, I cultivated a "Why am I here?" look and kept my distance. The host, who was attractive, kept trying to get me to dance and I told her the party was full of tossers and that the music was crap. I did eventually dance to one tune with her and the next morning after she had driven a few overnight guests home she took me to my flat. I invited her in and we ended up in bed together. It wouldn't have happened if I had been my usual smiling self. Unfortunately, when I saw that acting a little "dangerous" made me attractive to women I adopted a persona which attracted the wrong sort of woman. The action was great but I felt like my soul was dying. I became so cynical after two nights with two married women that I didn't think I could fall in love again. Then I met my late girlfriend who was a fantastic human being. If she hadn't died of ovarian cancer I would still be with her.
sorry to hear about your late-girlfriend; but your right, if you continue in a path just for hookups that where earned by fundamentally not being yourself, you'll only end up bitter, and yeah as you said attract the wrong sorts of people
It's true. I couldn't sustain the pretense. I hated myself for living a lie and I hated them for being attracted to that kind of guy. My late girlfriend saved my life. I could finally be myself with her. And we did "normal" things together like going to movies and cooking for each other. It wasn't just about the bedroom fun. I felt clean for the first time in years.
I know the feeling. Many years ago, I was suckered into a relationship with my married ex-boss. One day, out of the blue, I received a telephone call from her husband demanding to know if I was f****ing his wife. She didn't warn me that she had told him about us, just lit the blue touch paper and stood back to watch the fireworks. She was the ultimate drama queen and loved being the centre of her own soap opera.
They want you to be funny. They don’t want you to smile. When I’m being genuinely funny, I find it funny...and I smile. I’d rather smile when I feel like it than edit myself in order to elicit attraction.
@@Teglamen yeah I think that’s the fundamental difference. There are smiles that say I’m harmless, and there are smiles that are a genuine expression of what is amusing you or making you happy.
Trust me. They don't want you to be funny. It causes them to not take a guy seriously. One of my stand-up jokes gets at the fact that there aren't any women hanging out at comedy clubs trying to pick male comedians up after the show.
nothing but facts. i used to be smiling all the time because i am a happy person but i came across as eager and didnt realize it. then i stopped smiling alot to the point where girls say you should smile more. i think not smiling when you look at her says to her that you're not overly excited about her presence and she's just another human being that you don't pedestalize.
I took a course that I paid 1000 dollars for which taught me the importance of social skills. The first lesson was low status behaviors. Smiling was considered one of them because it comes off fake. For example, if you laugh and smile at everything, you are just a bot that always gives positive validation. Instead they said to smile when they really earned it. Make people work for a smile. Your value increases this way. But I'm like you. I'm naturally a happy person so I be smiling even if I don't have a reason too.
@@mario125ww sometimes i just Walk around smiling because i feel great joy without a reason. Also smiling is very healthy so i dont know If i should try to not smile and be someone else just because women like it. What are others examples for low status behaviour?
Nah fam, you're looking at everything wrong Don't ever stop smiling, life is beautiful. Thru the ups and downs. The less you smile the more grief and negative auras will be attracted You are what you attract
Had one of those myself. She's not invited to my wedding, and she's got a five year ban from my life, to make sure that my lady and I get to start fresh!
@@distributistsshrekvideo the point I'm trying to make is imagine not smiling to appear more attractive to women. It's a looks addition, literally no point being stone face and not smiling when you want to because of a insignificant hit to looks.
@@inconnu4961 true true but it's a joke I do know Leg day is important. And does add to you in looking dangerous if you have good legs . It is also important for balance and movement helps in martial arts . Legs are very important.
My smile is the only thing I've been randomly commented on by strangers so I'm gonna keep smiling no matter what science says. It also massively invites people to talk to you, which allows you to form more friendships.
Likely the results are falsified. the pictures are based on acting, (false smiles) which anyone would find unattractive. If a really high testosterone masculine good looking guy smiles at a woman, theres no way she will find him unattractive. if everything else in him is attractive to the woman. its just common sense and biology.
Smiling changes the feelings inside me, makes me feel happy, I will not put a fake angry face and so make me feel unhappy just to please some psychopath. They have to please me, not the reverse.
Reserve your smiles but don’t deprive them of it. My wife constantly reminds me that seeing my stoic murder face morphing into a genuine smile because i see her, still makes her happy.
Very interesting, makes sense in a way. Personally I smile because I’m at peace. Never had problems with women. Now that I know women find it unattractive gonna smile more because zero fs given. Changing for a woman will only bring disappointment. Stay on your purpose gents.
@@cockcarousel A smile isn't just "😬". You can smile with your lips and eyes. And if you have good friends, they won't be bothered by your teeth, they'll just want you to be happy. If you have really good friends, they'll even help you have your teeth fixed because life in general is much better with healthy teeth.
@@scr4932 It's easy to say. People do wonder why you don't laught properly, when a joke is told. Friends? Got none. Poverty for the whole lenght of my adulthood. No jobs, no social skills, the worst genes for woman (5'7, boyish frame, 5/10 looks). That's my life.
I stopped smiling at women but I also stopped seeking their attention now I understand why. I'm glad, I would not have been happy being with a women who wants me to be parmanently in attack mode. Yes better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war but I'm not gonna make myself miserable for them.
Smiling changes the feelings inside me, makes me feel happy, I will not put a fake angry face and so make me feel unhappy just to please some psychopath. They have to please me, not the reverse.
You know, I had this single mom proposition me after texting me on accident. I handled the initial conversation well, but it was difficult to get her to back off. How did I do it? I gave empty compliments, and sent her pictures of me smiling. Shut that down really fast. My most successful period of romantic success was when I was practicing martial arts. I was fit, confident, and a bit dangerous. It is crazy because looking into a lot of self help books on making friends they tell you to smile, yet it's better to be neutral or shameful than to show happiness.
Am considered unattractive to the modern woman, so I never smile or give them a hint that they might perceive as "I like you" ; because most of the times, if the woman doesn't find me attractive, she will begin acting rude, hostile and impolite; so I just keep it neutral and never ever give her any hint that I like her even if I actually do like her. If she is the one smiling, making advances, etc..., that is a different question.
This is exactly me. I'm always neutral even when I like a women. I feel I don't deserve to smile when I like a girl because I think I'm perceived unattractive by modern girls
The women choice is really interesting. I mean, there's very small variance. The variance might be even higher if you had a random distribution (on a small sample). Do women even feel, i.e. have empathy or are all of their feeling merely narcissistic and self-centered? Are they all sociopaths?
Interesting, did he say how many women they asked? Also it could maybe be a good thing for the guys that are ashamed or happy etc because there's less of a chance that they won't prefer you
I love it and think you could have added that smiling is an inate signal of submission in primates. For me, "Mama's last hug" from Frans de Waal was eye opening to understand human interactions. Animal emotions might be great for a Patreon video :)
Love this point. It's funny because I am always careful not to show my teeth in interactions with wild animals, but I never thought about whether or not I should show them to women lmao
@@BarryStyles Haha this is so on point! Actually the "lack of empathy and narcism" might just be a natural reaction to a submissive male. He becomes the pray.
No. If they don't like you / the way you look - it will be labeled creepy, harassing and manipulative. You will find yourself on the end of a social media dog pile, fine, imprisonment and a black listing. Give them nothing. Return their RBF.
I mean this is only true of female trash. Women aren't fundamentally driven by looks as we are. They're not blind, like they can observe that a man has good genetic markers or whatever but because they're emotionally driven they're more concerned about how they feel. So the only elements of the way you look that genuinely affect normal women are the ones that affect the way they feel e.g. do you make them feel safe/protected due to your body language and posture. Everything else is way less important. If a woman turns out to be actually genuinely surface-level shallow then yes you should avoid her, but those women aren't and shouldn't be attractive pretty much the instant you find this out.
🎉Smiling changes the feelings inside me, makes me feel happy, I will not put a fake angry face and so make me feel unhappy just to please some psychopath. They have to please me, not the reverse.
Women finding men showing shame more 'attractive' than happy ones is very easily explained. Guilt and shame lead to easy manipulation levers for women, happiness not so much.
This makes perfect sense. When a man smiles it indicates that he is happy and is probably spending his own money on himself rather than on her. Women detest this. Studies also show that a woman likes to start arguments to see her man under distress because it indicates that he is fully invested in the relationship.
Lol. Science? No wonder all the experts are “baffled” all the time. Smiling works. Here are the findings of my 35 year study of women. Worked when I was a skinny 14 year old punk, when I was 28 and 25 lbs overweight and now at 50 when I’m in great shape. You see a pretty woman. You catch her eye and smile at her. If she smiles back, approach and say hello, because she finds you attractive. If she does not smile back, do not approach her, because she’s not interested. It’s that simple.
This is wrong. Doesn't matter if you smile or not. Only matters if you are handsome or not (and by modern women's standards, handsome is nothing less than an 8/10). A handsome, tall guy smiling or not smiling will attract women and an average to below average guy (like the one in the study) will not attract women. Study shows no significance values and is a small sample size - the variation in female responses to the guy's different poses doesn't seem to be significant enough - it more shows that women by and large rate an average guy low no matter how he presents himself.
@@cv6176 Nope. Tall handsome guy smiles = charming, charismatic. Average guy smiles = nice guy (friendzone material). Tall handsome guy doesn't smile = mysterious. Average guy doesn't smile = boring or angry. To woman, looks = personality. Wake up bro
Some people smile when they're nervous... as a defense mechanism against potential threats when they're not confident in their physical and verbal abilities. Sometimes smiling can offend someone. Cowards who smile a lot will avoid smiling in such situations. E.g. some dude threatens violence, and you smile it off like it's joke.
Funny that women find pride the most attractive when most women will tell you, "Egos on guys are so ugly." Apparently they are all lying to themselves.
Not exactly. They are criticizing the man they fell for. Every time a woman speaks about men, and what she thinks men "should" be like, etc. She is talking about an actual real man from her past who was NOT like that, because she believes that it would have worked out with him if he WAS like that. Obviously, she can't take responsibility herself, so it must be him and his lack of: insert terrible advice here. She genuinely believes that she is giving you nuggets of GOLD with this advice, because she pictures Chad doing it with her and it makes rainbows shoot out of her 🌈💦
Women are looking for very different things than men. I definitely notice a woman's smile. But that's not enough. I listen to the way they talk and watch how they interact with other people. That's what separates the pretty girls from the ones I'd actually want to know better.
This is so true. I was chatting to a girl in night bar and the bouncer said something derogatory to me. I called him out and I escalated my aggression towards him until he backed down. So that ended I looked around for the same girl and I could see her right in the corner looking at me. I sure I had ruined my chances with her but that wasn't the case. It really was a burning bush moment for me.
I think it is important to show both sides: One side that you can be trusted (smile) and one side that you are strong and protective. Yeah you have to be a threat, but she has to be sure that you are not a threat to her. You can do a smirk. More important is that you don't smile just at everybody, but just when you see her. When she sees you looking with focus, but only smiling at her, that makes her feel special, because she is the only one who can make you smile and see your "soft side". Ofc she has to earn seeing your soft side. Start with a smirk and a glance that she is your prey. To later on you can show the "soft side" Think of yourself as a book character: When you are always "happy" you are boring. When you are always a "threat" you are boring or she is scared of you. Why wouldn't you be a threat to her? Twist it. Show a lot of different sides of yourself. Naturally happening, not forced and overwhelming. Start with what is most interesting for another person to drive them into your story and get them hooked. Start with a smirk, be happy, be vulnerable, be a threat and full of force to reach your dreams / to do justice. Give off the feeling that you don't need her, but that you like her. Ofc the better your looks, the more mistakes you can make. You can improve your looks and your force/strength with a lot of sport and the right diet. Do that!
I never smile at women. Never. If it's a work colleague, I politely nod in greeting and say good morning or whatever, but none of that smiling, friendly banter nonsense. And if it's out in the wild, I never engage at all. Avoid eye contact with them, say nothing to them. If they say something to me first I will politely answer, but I still won't smile. That is, unless I find that person attractive and see a potential date. I'll let the guard down a little but I still won't be smiling, just more willing to engage in conversation. Ironically being cold and emotionless around women has gotten me a lot of dates whereas before when I tried to be nice and smile at people (because women told me they like it when men are friendly and smile) all I got was the opportunity to be treated like a brother or asexual best friend.
so do not demonstrate happiness, do not smile and stop feeling shame - sounds like healthy life advices, which will not end up in mental disorders, right?
If you live in western society, we assume you already have the mental disorders! If you are trying to sexually attract women! if you are not, do what you like! I hope you arent always thinking in terms of sexually attracting women? THats no way for a healthy man to live!