Staying Stuck in Bad Jobs, Bad Relationships FEELs Like The Safe Choice: Here's Why 

“The comfort zone” is rarely actually comfortable, it’s just a place to hide from the necessary changes that’ll make you even more uncomfortable in the short term but leave you less uncomfortable once you’ve gotten through the transitional state…

The relief I felt when I heard you say that she is 47 and in her prime time to be thinking about what she is going to be doing for money. I'm 32 and feel so far behind.

Omg, this defines my existence. "The closest thing to safety that I have in your life." Mind blown open. Thanks to your channel, which I only discovered a week ago (!!), I am really coming to terms with how CPTSD from childhood trauma is impacting my life. Thank you so much, CCF!

No, their questions were not reasonable nor were they “ just curious.” They were envious of her award ( and probably her talent too)so this was a tactic to repeatedly break down her good feelings about herself. Get the hell away from these a-holes, honey. Pursue your music. It’s so healing.

Oh my gosh the timing of this video! I am in the middle of being forced to move from our home with a beautiful backyard into a small apartment because that is all that is availavle that is affordable in our area. I just had my 3rd child and am turning 40 in a couple of weeks. My relationship is falling apart. My body is falling apart. Everything is changing...but I have been stuck. Stuck in a run down house with a leaky basement because we were in love with the yard and afraid we couldnt ever get better. Stuck in an unhealthy relationship afraid to go to counseling together because it would be the last effort and I am afraid if it fails. Stuck in bad habits because I am afraid to get better. Stuck in a fear that I chose to remain stuck in over loving my children enough to rise to challenges and better our lives. Life just came along and shook that all up...kicking me in the butt because I dont think I would ever believe in myself enough to take steps to unstick myself. I have alot of work ahead of me, but this video was the final sign that something greater than myself believes in me and its about time I believe in myself too.

Similar story. I'm almost 59. I never got any recognition for being abused. I'm the scapegoat. Many golden siblings. I came to live around the corner from them when I was a single mum. Thinking we could play happy families. Bad idea! I left at 17 and was determined to have a great life!!!! And I did! I became an artist when my son was born. I'm still pursuing it. Money has been an issue, but I keep going. Don't wait for your family to change or admit they were wrong. Let them go with love and live your life!

I've allowed my parents way too much influence in my life. The narrative has always been that I was lazy and irresponsible. That continued into my 40s. And I accepted it as truth. I realized in 2020 exactly how toxic my family has been to me, especially my abusive older sister who I have cut off. I have completely reordered my life and I'm in the home stretch of an international move 2000 miles away. It's both exhilarating and terrifying but I've just got to sink or swim away from these people who constantly belittle and trigger me. Unfortunately I'm now back at home living with them for two weeks but I will survive!

I stayed in a bad relationship because he's the only man who offered to let me stay home and raise our child ... And I was scared to leave because I didn't want to lose the benefit of staying home with my baby... But I had to make that decision .. I know I'll have to work all my life but I'll try to get remote work so I can work from home and stay with my child... I left my son with his grandmother for now so that I can get on my feet because I am going to be a single mother now. ❤

Yep... realised I've done this so many times😢 I've been craving and chasing security and safety in all the wrong, unhealthy ways.

I know its not meant that way, but sometimes I can't help feeling that being told that we are all responsible for our own recoveries is like telling someone in a wheelchair to just get over it and get up and walk. Sometimes the damage is so bad that you can't just shake it off. And you can't carry on as if it never happened, or get used to it, or I don't know what. Logically, I know how to minimise my symptoms in order to function properly, but I can't escape the feeling that I'm walking round with a gaping hole in my middle that probably everyone else can see. I am not whole. How can I be when I have this well of sadness left to me by the utter misery of my childhood?

The letter writer's dilemma is exactly why we must go no contact and STAY that way. They simply no longer exist. My family is all within a couple miles from me, and I have made routines to never run into them but they are always THERE. A couple incidents of running into and coming out the better (a smile and a breezy "Hello! Beautiful day!") has made it less fearful to be in public, but one day I will live somewhere that I am not always kind of looking around :)

I stayed in a marriage for 30 years for these reasons. I traded financial safety for emotional misery. Finally couldn’t take it anymore and fell apart Had an emotional breakdown.

All I could think while listening to the letter was "Get out get out get out".... there are so many reasons to go no contact, especially when you have dreams and talents that are totally not supported by your family of origin (on top of past abuse). BEST BEST BEST of luck in the piano thing, and congratulations... run with it! 👏🎶🎵

This is still something that I am working through. I still remember saying to my therapist many years ago that I felt "comfortably uncomfortable."

7:04 Oh, gosh...all the questions? That's so they can sabotage your plans. Ask a neighbor to watch your cat, or a pet sitter, please. ❤️

I can identify with this story very much , I grew up in a similar situation with my family , also a lot co - dependency going on here,I became caregiver for both my elderly parents during the Pandemic they were alcoholics and rage aholics growing up , I have two sisters that have addiction , mental illness , so they weren't able to help much , But all my trauma came back when I was around these people , even though I have done alot of therapy and a member of Al-Anon , I lost my parents during Covid but I didn't bounce back , the trauma remained , I'm working on it ,I tend to isolate , so I have to remind myself to reach out out and ask for help , Sending love to you Connie , I'm an artist musician also , and it's not easy , stay with your passion follow your muse , thank you for this video it helped me today

Dearst pianist, I've got your back baby!!! When i was compelled by mother to learn piano, she also did everything possible to make me fail!!! And i did!!! Years went by and i tried again and was great.😮 revenge is sweet my love❤❤❤❤

Thank you for acknowledging childhood neglect because I feel like that's gets overlooked a lot of times when discussing the subject of CPTSD. My father died when I was 8, having a heart attack while driving the 2 of us home from my softball practice. It was very traumatic and scary but what was equally as traumatic was the neglect I suffered due to my mom's grief and inability to get over his death. It changed our family forever. I don't feel I was abused, just profoundly neglected so that is why I appreciate the acknowledgment. Thank you.

I'm proud of her for getting away once. I hope she can find a way to get money and move away. I wish making enough is always easy. I hope she gets a break from her problems and then she can think of career or job options. I'm guessing she felt like she has tried all the jobs/careers and nothing's left. Life can be hard. I feel for her,

I'm glad you bring up bad jobs specifically. I would say I've healed like 90% in most areas of my life. I'm now moving from working in gastronomy to studying informatics. I can't tell you how hard it was for me to make up my mind. I was constantly questioned by friends and family why informatics, why the place where I wanted to study. Despite it being a good change, I faced so much resistance. Friends kept projecting professions onto me, that just wouldn't suit me or wouldnt grant me a long term perspective. You or Dr Ramani once said, that narcissistic work environments actually resemble toxic family patterns (the boss having scapegoats, golden child, enablers etc). When you work for a toxic person, you stop growing. Gastronomy (insert other branche) often lacks healthy structures, and so do toxic families. Structures that may lack in the work environment, talking about lacking time schedules, range of tasks you're supposed to do, opening times, having a moody boss or superior can all be indicators, that you may encounter in your work environment. Hence, you fall back into your adapted survival techniques in your work environment. Unfortunately, friends are not really helpful when talking about these subjects, because just like with toxic families, when someone has no experienced it himself, it can be so hard to understand, that you cannot just quit or make demands or speak up to resolve the situation. Colleagues unfortunately often only serve as enablers, who gaslight you into coping strategies, and you're likely to comply because you're the new one and think things will change for the better. To everyone who has been in the same situation: Your career life will continue without that toxic job, no matter how your colleagues will talk about you when you leave, you will be capable of paying your bills, this environment is not forever

Winning prizes at 47 for playing the piano Connie?! That's amazing!

Over the years it’s been so easy to get sucked back into my family dynamics… I begin to forget and miss them. I think of it as being diabetic sugar is good but, it just doesn’t do me any favors! I can only do my family on tiny doses. It’s up to me to take care of me first! My elderly mom needs help but, I have to let others do more and expect myself to do less. I don’t wish it was this way but, I’m like a diabetic and she is sugar 😑 it’s not my fault I’m diabetic but, if I eat to much sugar that’s my fault. (That’s a metaphor- I’m not diabetic)! Connie, play piano BE amazing to yourself… your family is never going to change (if they do great) but, you can… you can do the things to actually be GOOD to yourself. The Daily practice has certainly helped me😊 sending good thoughts your way!

Just one niggling point: Anna says "I don't know the context of what you hold against [your older sister] so badly" It was there ---- Connie said she was "abused" by her older sister, and that "In college, my older sister convinced my parents I should quit music, and I was forced to quit ... This same sister stole my graduate school acceptance letter and I almost missed the deadline to confirm the spot." Also when the older sister would decide to step in and help with parents, she was "in charge" and "giving orders" to the sisters who were there and doing the work. It sounds like the older sister was a sibling who was in on the scapegoating along with the parents. That would be an interesting topic to hear what Anna might have to say about it. Anyway, the solution was definitely spot-on and great!!! Sounds like older sister is one MORE good reason for Connie to not live near her family. .

When you started reading the letter I thought you were narrating my story or that my sibling wrote you 😯 very similar in the first half. I went back to my parents because of burnout too and then pandemic happened, I felt trapped and lost my motivation, confidence and energy to fight back when my parents were cruel to me, I lost the motivation to do the right thing for me, I knew they wont change, and I was so tired just surviving. I’m working on it... Connie you are not alone, sending a big hug 🤗

I feel like I’m stuck being homeless. I got sober in February and have been dry since. Doesn’t seem like anything els is getting better

A pianist once told me that people who have the passion for playing (any instrument really) are sensitive souls. I'm so happy this woman, this sensitive soul is pursuing her beautiful talents. It takes true strength and courage to do so in the face of apathy. ❤👏👏

Amen to keeping a job. My own businesses were my favorite work I have ever done. That is why I need to heal and I had that anger, then my ma passed and I went waaaaaay off the deep end. I understand her sister....I have one, I chose not to have her in my life now. I want the energy to write you. This is all I can do. Wishing you (the writer) peace, hope and joy. Thank you Anna, this is much needed today.

I've been on my own since I was 15. I realized early on that my parents weren't going to be of any help in my life at all. at that time, the only thing I knew for sure is I don't want to be anything like them and I want to be far, far away from them. fast forward, I did seek out my dad when i was in my 40'S, over a cup of coffee with my dad, I realized I could never say anything about my childhood, it wasnt going to be heard. I just live with that. it is what it is.

Good luck Connie and congrats on winning the piano contest!👏🍀

The closest thing to safety you have in your life, So True. Harsh reality of people struggling with childhood trauma 😅.

Hah! I quit my job on Monday. I do have a problem with toughing things out so as not to look like a 'quitter'. So many jobs have high turnover simply due to their nature (I work in hospitality), so it's hard to tell from the get-go. I also could no longer function in this job- a commercial kitchen utterly infested with rats, dead and alive, and I just know they'll be saying I wasn't 'tough enough' and 'suck it up buttercup', just like they said about everyone else who has left. :(

Hey Connie, Way to go to still follow your pursuits!! It sounds like you were like me growing up with Narcissist parents who neglected the kids emotional needs and then the kids competed for lack of normal emotional attention and the ability to express your emotions. We are the only ones who can control our destiny and you've probably been fed a huge lifelong dose of shame and guilt and narcissist energy to keep you coming back to feed their needs. So getting informed about narcissistic family relationships and it's affect on daughters of narcissists might really help you understand why you have such hurt and are so exhausted. I feel your pain and it is so deep and dibilitating. I'm also trying to break free because like you I cratered in a very tough high stress executive job because I've fought CPTSD all my life without knowing it or knowing why. Im 59 years old and I only recently learned what narcissist parent emotional abuse can do to a person. It leads to so much more trauma but you always think it's your fault. It was not your fault. But that said now you and I are the only ones who can learn to put it in our past and move forward. I listen to the CrappyChildhoodFairy and just keep moving forward. Like you I also feel so much constant criticism by my now elder parents and other adult siblings. But a lot of their criticism so am learning is never going to change because many of them have high narcissist personalities. But I do not want to pass this on to my two children. It is not the legacy I want to leave and I don't want to end my life full of anger and resentment. I feel your deep pain. I'm right there in the trenches with you,!! But we can both get out. We both have really awesome talents so let's use them and just take the reins and not wait for someone else to save us because no one is going to do it. We can save ourselves and we are both worth it!!! Sending you tons of love. You are a warrior because I think like my family you were so emotionally neglected and you had so much heart that you really suffered and have really felt hurt and alone all your life. There are others like you out here. So don't give up! I'm way older! You can fix it and heal and you have a lot of great life to live!!

The timing of this vid in my life is amazing. I can’t agree more with the idea of having a stable and supportive form of income to maintain independence, even if it is 3 side hustle jobs. Im working on this myself. Many similarities to the subject here…

To put yourself out there with your musical abilities and be recognized for that., wow. That took courage. Give yourself credit for that. There's a healthy part of you looking for expression.

Yes you are totally correct finding a way to make money that works for you is a huge step in being able to move forward

Way to go Connie!! Congratulations 🎹 I got goose bumps when Anna asked listeners to celebrate your winning. Thank you Anna for wanting Connie to get the recognition she deserves & is long overdue!! Im glad you wrote Anna a letter & wish you the best moving forward in the daily practice!!

How do you have boundaries with aging parents but at the same time, also provide help the they need as they age?

What I really do like about your videos, apart from the subjects, is the fact that you speak in a moderate speed. You are not like those hectic instagrammers or wherever they post, instead you speak as if you had the time to pass your message and to go into detail, to be emotionally present for us and to be a role model. Also, Connie, I wish you all the strength to get out of this hell. I would never ever go back to my mother and I never really grieved that she cut contact when I left at a relatively young age. It makes things a lot easier. Don't feel obligated to help people who wouldn't do the same for you! It is not a contract, you are free to leave. Equally, I make a lot of music and like to sing and I swear musicians are funny, friendly and I rarely met an idiot or someone stupid among them! Keep on playing the piano, I wish I could!

Yikes ...hope the letter writer gets to experience a little joy and happiness sounds like she's had a rough ride. 🙏❤🙏

Sounds to me like the mother was most likely a narcissist and was probably the golden child in her family with the aunt that died being the scape goat. Then the lady writing the letter was the scape goat witt her older sister being the golden child. They are all also jealous of her musical talent. I would think go low or no contact and definately move!

I relate so hard. One of the biggest hurdles in living life for me is the doubt, and it kept me going back for years in cycles. I constantly doubted my own memories, conviction, boundaries. I know that when I got out of the abuse, because it was my family/parents, and so much of how I viewed myself and the world was because of them, I would strive and work hard and get myself to safety or find little moments of happiness and then immediately feel guilt/doubt and think back "why did i leave, maybe it wasnt that bad, maybe I made it all up, maybe now we can have a healthy relationship, maybe they will be proud of me or i can help now, maybe if they see how good im doing we can move on"....so yeah, the doubt in myself and the "reality" of the situation kept me going back, analyzing and dreaming + ongoing parental rescue fantasy--maybe they'll be my parents now, care for me!! I get it.

I watch all of your videos now and sometimes I go for long walks and listen to hours on end. Even if the words sometimes pass my consciousness after listening I just feel so good ! It is like regulating myself ! I have today started the daily practice after a high-stress situation and notice an IMMEDIATE change in my whole being ! Who knew it could be possible to take control of our own emotional state!!!!!!!!!! Really you are the best thing I have stubled upon after struggling all my life with C-PTSD and thinking it was something else (autism, anxiety, depression, borderline disorder...) when actually they were the SYMPTOMS of cptsd. You really are an angel and I am SO GLAD you are and keep on sharing your beautifull gift to help us heal ourselves, that no institute or other can help !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Truly so gratefull

This is extremely surreal to hear because this is my life right now. I understand, Connie, because I am currently in the same situation. Very frustrated although I know that I am free to leave but struggle with chronic fatigue and so I feel I need to stay where I am. My parent that I live with has said to me that they can get a live-in caregiver if I decide to leave but I am so exhausted physically I don't think I can. Going to talk with someone at my local church about all this on Monday. Hopefully, I will get some kind of resolution that will give me peace and joy.

Congrats to Connie for following her passion no matter what her family says and writing in because she knows something has to change 🎉❤🎉 I also thought I could move back home, I was healed enough. I live with the fact that I wasn't and I had to move away from my elderly mother and live my own life. It's so hard but also *so* joyful Man, I hope Connie follows the music 🎶 Thanks CCF for choosing this letter I think it resonates with a lot of people and is making me think more seriously about the membership cuz this is exactly what I needed to be reminded of, personally lol 😊

Omfg, ppls lives are so much worse than mine! Sending compassion.

To Connie, you're strong, talented and have the ability to rise above your current situation!❤😊 I've been a caregiver for my parents for almost 8 years, working on healing my chronic illness and pain. I'm in a selfish family of narcs who say they're going to help but never do. They've ignored me in the past when I asked for help in taking a break from caregiving in order to take care of my own health. I'm at the point now where I'm working to transition care for my dad and step away from my family. To Anna, your channel has helped me tremendously and I see a lot of myself and personal situations in the stories of others you help on this channel. Thank you, you're awesome keep up the good work.

I know this so well. Please keep going, Connie! Lean into your piano playing efforts. Don't let your CPTSD and others' negativity steer you away from your beautiful creativity. Sending you so much love and healing! 🙏💪❤‍🩹

I’ve been stuck forever but not with everything, just with big problems. I recognized it and slowly searched out to find help, like this channel. Working hard to move forward for a year now that I understand Progress is occurring slowly, it’s worth the effort. Go for the solutions and believe they are possible

Love ya Lady! Thank you!! That “learned helplessness” is an ass-kicker bouy!

I just have to point out - you were fixing meals and doing laundry at such an early age? You are an amazing person that has such strength! I hope you set yourself free from people who don't support your hopes and dreams.

Sending you strength!! U got the power you need within you. Learn to set boundaries. Start small. Get 1% better/healthier/stronger everyday. It will compound like mad!

Connie, sending you wishes here! This is to me as well. We want to be free and enjoy our lives. Shit happens, people hurt us, but we CAN and we WILL get back on our feet if we choose to!

Ana, you are just simply absolutely amazing! You can address address difficult issues, point to the core with kindness, firmness and avoiding all the "modern" psycho-bubble. You are a shining star on my horizon!

Idk if harsh is the word, but you laid into this one. I think this is the first time I've heard you say so strongly that she needs to get it together...more or less. Haha me too. Your videos help. A lot.

Congratulations to you 👏 🎉 The piano is a hard, difficult instrument to play. Focus on your instrumeant. Once you're back form the piano week trip, (you can take the cat with you in the hotel room or B&B) I'm sure, it'll give you the encouragement to move out on your own or with a friend or another family member. People are always renting out rooms everywhere! Just clean up after yourself. Don't be too noisy past 11pm. You will be okay, in an safe environment. With no toxic people are, or if the people you move in with are toxic. Just start looking for another place to move to. (listen to your body) Just Inform your roommate at the time that you are moving out. Because you feel unsafe, that's it, that's all. You got this! It's never too late to live your fulfilled life. ❤ Sending you peace ✌️ & love ❤️

There's no way to live with them. Just get out. Go anywhere.

Connie..go ahead with your piano passion..all will work out and get away from your family and try to socialise in a new set up as ccf has suggested ❤️❤️❤️Wishing you all the best☺️🫰Sending you all the love🫶Godbless!!!💕

Sounds like a LatinX family. So many of us children of immigrants suffer the same 😢 I was a very parentified child, had to rush home from school and make dinner

Dear AWESOME🎀 TALENTED🎀 CONNIE - GO GIRL💃 AND TAKE THE WORLD BY STORM!💖💃💖

Thank you for having this channel. ! I relate to these videos on so many levels!

I love your advice to concentrate on her career find that path so she can get her own money and freedom to choose her next path 🙏 power is in the now! Looking back keeps her paralyzed in anger shame and loss of time

Thank you for your work. ♥️🙏🏽

THANK YOU, CONNIE for writing this letter!❤🥳 I could easily be the author of this letter. It rings true to me, and my upbringing, in so many ways. The issues with the guy is the story of my life, and the primary reason why I started watching Anna. It's great to see that I'm not the only one dealing with feeling like I have a crazy family, and a crazy mindset about romantic relationships. I wish you much success in your music career, and abundance in love. ❤

These are things I have struggled with my whole life. I don't believe I am likeable or deserving of a good job.

I can understand why she moved back with her family because if you have no job and nobody who can help you, you might not have a choice. I’m in a similar situation but I have no place to go if things go wrong. It’s awful how isolating trauma can be. It makes it hard to adapt to the world and belong anywhere. And so when you move home, all those old childhood patterns resurface. It’s a hard situation.

Hi, Anna! Although, I agree with all of your advice in this letter, I don't believe the parents have a screw loose lol (16:30). To me it sounds like most Latino families. (My father's side is South American; my mother's side Caribbean). Not necessarily anything nefarious going on with this woman's parents; it's just the attitude towards raising children that most Latin families have, especially when the parents are immigrants, and the children are 1st generation Americans. (I am a 1st gen American on both sides of my family). The parent(s)/ families feel as though the children "owe" them for having gone through the struggle of obtaining a better life for them. Granted, it often time IS a real struggle to enter this country, sometimes even life threatening; however, I agree with you. No matter the struggle, perceived or actual, it's a parent's obligation to provide a good and safe life for their children. To make children feel as though they owe the parents something in return is ludicrous. I have heard this scenario ring true from other 1st generation American friends of other countries, as well. I just wanted to provide some perspective. Thank you for all you do, Anna! 💗🤗

Connie, I suggest you practice consistently the Daily Practice. I am new to this and it was difficult to get into the groove but I can see positive.....🎉

Connie, I don’t know you and will probably never meet but I love you as a person. It’s amazing that you have musical talent and even won an award! So many people are born into families that will never have their backs. They will betray you and hang you out to dry. Ditch them. It’s hard but it will help. You will never change them and you don’t deserve their baggage that they can’t or won’t sort out. For me when any opportunity to resolve problems with family is forever taken off the table, things get better. I still think about the past but it’s slowly getting better. I no longer have anything shoved in my face. The people who were doing the shoving are no longer around. Do whatever it takes to not let the people causing you misery live inside your head. The one thing that helped me the most was learning to forgive myself for my perceived and real shortcomings. I no longer was awake all night going over every stupid thing I’d said or done that day thinking I should or should not have said/done this and that. It was a start. Also, there was a guy on many of the talk shows years ago who walked the audiences through mentally putting the child you onto the adult you lap and saying “I love you and will always love you””. It sounds simplistic but it hit home for me. The unconditional love I had always wanted. I wish you all the luck in the world in everything you do. Remember to mentally hold yourself in your arms and love you.

I found the feedback frustrating about the sister. Maybe because I still have a lot of healing work to do, but the sister has boundaries and stand up for herself probably because her parents taught her and allowed her to. My parents didn’t respect the boundaries I made and I gave up but my mom would encourage my sister to make boundaries with people. My mom never once allowed me to make boundaries. I always was too headstrong according to them and needed to do what they said more in their opinion. About her ruining or career or sabotaging her schooling, my sister did the same things to me. Older sisters given family power are horrible.

Charlie brown cartoons were published in the UK too

Yes the subconscious mind search always familiar patterns I realize that and I decided reprogram and create another reality

I was raised in a narcissistic family dysfunctional religious family system and childhood trauma and emotional neglect and religious trauma and suffer from C-PTSD and feeling I’m not good enough even at work too

Your points about taking control of your life and accepting that our families aren't going to see our value is well taken but I think the trauma of being mobbed at her former job was overlooked. She has been mobbed and scapegoated by her family and then at work, where she has to go and endure to keep a roof over her head. Her family may well have had something to do with that. I know that many family scapegoats are also mobbed and harassed at their workplaces because people are cruel and they are cowards and sick people in management take out their illnesses on vulnerable workers.. You cover so many topics that nobody touches, can you add workplace harassment, especially mobbing, to your list? It is rarely discussed but for scapegoats it's a huge factor in why people can't help themselves. Employers put major barriers to just earning a living and keeping health insurance

I love your insights, but I would have wished for more practical tips on how to heal this, instead of only mentioning your courses. They are surely grateful, but currently I can't afford them.

Damn, this is exactly what I have and currently am experiencing... it is endemic to my current life "situation". I am on the ropes at my job, everything feels likes it's working against me ala Charlie Brown, living with abuser, outsiders recognize im "stuck", etc.

I do the daily practice twice a day but only for 10 minutes, not including the writing time. But that little bit helps. I don't have any extra time to give more to it. Its not that I ignore self care. In between my full time job. The animals i rescue and my regular pets. Plus i work out 3 times a week. Plus counseling i feel like i run to get to bed.😅

Ive been fallen off the path for so many times i stopped counting. Now i practics to remind myself that i am actualyl on a path again.. and the path is healing. Its different than getting the job or getting the girl or doing the things.. but its the only path thats worth going on right now.

Wow, SAME! Especially the part about being the youngest sibling having to take care of geriatric parents, and older siblings not helping at all, except for the "big stuff!" It's a very complicated situation, and like me, quite possible narcissistic parents made you totally dependent on them somehow. You feel responsible for taking care of them, and guilty if you don't (even if the situation is totally unbearable and abusive), which is why it feels impossible to set those boundaries. Caregiving is EXTREMELY stressful, so you have to take extra special care of yourself. If your parents can afford it, call in a home care worker a few times a week so you can get a break, practice your piano, take a peaceful walk in the woods etc. Sending you lots of love to extricate yourself from the unhealthy situation ❤️❤️❤️

I’ve been following the channel for about 1,5 year and it feels nice to see new people being helped. Congratulations on the great work 👏🏻

I find I can only listen to short parts of your videos before I scroll because I feel like I'm going to throw up. I know this means I need to learn this, so I just take it bit by bit. Thank you.

Brilliant advice!

Connie's story is also mine. But I found a trauma specialist and safrice to pay her. This is very good video. However I am not stuck. I am growing. Hope others find this video guide them well

Being alone feels safe.

Hello again I also want to say that I'm starting to really like your videos when you read it and talk about what you read.. I have to admit when I first started watching your videos like this I thought I would be bored out of my head. I'm actually learning from the experience of others. You do a great job at it.

Praying Connie can follow her passion...

Connie..go ahead with your piano passion..all will work out and get away from your family and try to socialise in a new set up as ccf has suggested ❤️❤️❤️Wishing you all the best☺️🫰

There’s nothing wrong being older. Micro aggressions are bouncing off my boundaries to be sucked back into their sources. I haven’t worked my tail off to heal so that I can now be talked down and dissed because I live in an iggo , ageist society. There’s nothing shameful about getting or being older. Celebrating how far I’ve come!

Fantastic news about the music award - keep your eyes on that 'prize' (ie your own passions and contributions in life). I have signed up to learn the techniques here because I know as a creative person, that they have helped even when maybe not consistently applied. Julia Cameron's The Artists Way' (original book) I found a good way of getting and keeping aligned creatively. I wish her the best of luck.

Started doing the daily practice and meditation and its really helpful. Thank you Anna

Being stuck with bad roommates/landlords for sure. Moving is like dating, unfortunately.

Love your channel more than others that talks about cpstd

"This is how you live with them - you don't!" 🤣

You are very authentic

big congrats Connie on your recognition in piano contest,I celebrate you💖

Anna, sounds like learned helplessness? 🤷‍♀️

Ima slide this into my watch later because I know it’s going to hurt and I definitely don’t have the spoons right now

All jobs are bad, very rarely, once in decades, if you survive in one field, will you ever meet a quality boss or company. Good luck.

😂that's how you live with them 😂 YOU DON''T!😂 I am taking a 6-,month break from Dysfunction Junction,. I need to get my legs back under me after an extended period of unseen trauma, and brojen dreams. I have been working those 12 steps, writing writing writing my fears. I can't change the people i live with. But i can and have changed me. It shows. I just started a miracle job, an answer to prayer for an employer i could trust. "Don't argue with people that they dont meet your needs. Meet your own needs". Nicole LePera

Yeah, we’ll I’m going to Rome. Tomorrow.

Thank you ❤