If He Says This...RUN (towards him, he's a great guy!) 

i hate it when i had written proof of something, the person i try to show it to wouldn't even read it, and still insist that i was wrong. that's a little bit different than what your ex did to you, but the point is the same, they both simply didn't want to. you can't make someone do what they don't want to do.

@@dian277 In the end, their pride was more important to both of them than simply humbling themselves for the sake of the relationship. It didn't take anything from them, so why be so stubborn?

He didn't show any interest in your interests (you). Good for you for leaving.

Yeah he's annoying

That is so aggy. Good thing you ditched that cheez it

Lol right ❤

That's great but you should also be a green flag to him by not always behaving like that and expect him to always be understanding of it. Not saying you always do that but just not make it a habit that becomes a bother. Treat him the way you want to as well.

@@nicoleblake2700That’s exactly what I was going to say, she should also be a green flag for him.

Wow this is the exact opposite of my ex I'm so glad men like this exist 🧚‍♀️

@@mira3498 It’s the exact opposite of my ex too! That’s why I’m in awe with it, like what world did I step into?!? Is this real? I wanted to share that there are men like this out there! They do exist! But he and I both work hard to make it work, and a lot of the success we have is because of people like Brian here who has given me a template to know what I have and not mess it up and help cultivate it! 💗🙏🏻

Wish the two of you the best🥲🫂✨️

Oh wow, I wish you two the best ❤

I’m happy for you. I’m 64 divorced single mum still hoping to find Mr Right 😊

You will have him!

@@itismetotori Interesting you should say that. The same day I met a man who is smitten with me, is asking me out and crazy about me. I'll be needing him to slow down.

Trust runs a real close second to Respect

True!

This is exactly how my current partner is, woah

@@TheOneAndOnlyBobbie blessed!

Agreed! I was in a bad relationship right now. Abuse.

Abusive relationships do that too. I get it!

unfortunately some men would pretend for as long as they can until they have you locked down.

Oh no. Sorry to hear that. It’s hard trusting someone fully nowadays.

​@@Sunshine-uk7yo thanks for the kind words

😮😮

True for me so far. I tried to be friends again with my Ex, since we were friends first but somehow we both ended up in old and comfortable patterns and that was the end. Neither lovers nor friends now.

@@CosimaNonymouse yess similar experience

Nah, it's just simple minds oversimplifying and generalizing.

What's the issue?

​@@ananyagandhi8829 There is none. I absolutely love the fact that he talked about my niece first, and then about me. I appreciate both of his comments, but the fact that she is cute is way more important than the fact that I smile.

Red flag men seek out very understanding and nurturing people. Then they do everything they can to milk that. They give you a lot of stories about how so many people hurt them and how hard their life is. They have excuses for everything. This sets up the idea that you should be very forgiving and want to help them and show them real love. And it also means you may rarely say no. No to bad behavior. No to being given a lot of excuses. And sadly green flag men observe this and interpret it as desperate behavior- when you accept a man who is not treating you well. Good men see that as- she just wants any man. Look how she sticks around with that crumby guy. She must just want any guy. If i dated her, she wouldn’t even care about who i am. She just wants a warm body next to her.” The most attractive thing to a good man and the most repellent thing to a red flag is the word no.

@@Mayfloweralways Actually, I think my problem is that I find "Bad Boys" a little exciting. Probably related to my CPTSD

@@DS40764 ahhh, you wanting them is another thing. I wasn’t attracted to those men, but i think i was unknowingly accepting the idea that everything wrong was my fault because i was raised that way. Things were my fault and to get back in good graces, be extra good sort of thing. It helped a lot for me to understand the why to change it. I hope it helps to know we can change. I have a great guy now. I just want everyone else to have that happiness too

I posted a longer response but for some reason it was removed. I basically said finding out the reason for going for red flag men is a big step to being able to find a happy relationship. Wishing you good luck.

@@Mayfloweralways Thank you for your comment!

You broke it off because he was giving you gifts? Seriously? Seems to me that you have low self esteem and subconciously don't feel worthy of receiving gifts. That's what makes you feel uncomfortable. Maybe deep down you feel like you need to give sth. back in return but guess what - you don't! A simple 'thank you' and appreciation is enough. Men are naturally givers and women receivers - at least it should be that way. Actually by accepting sth a man does for you, helps you with, or simply gifts you sth, you boost his ego and he feels masculine as it is naturally for a man to be a protector and provider for a woman he likes/loves. So it's a win win situation.

I had a BF that gave me gifts every time he screwed up or neglected me (which was sadly often). Was it like that?

​@@aerochiccWhat do you mean with "screwed up? What did he do?

@@minnic.6992 Forgot my birthday, was consistently late when we had plans, would ignore me when other people were paying attention to him...

You have to be careful with gifts. Gifts can also be red flags because narcissistic men will give gifts as a love-bombing technique, and cheating men will give gifts to compartmentalize and soothe their conscience. I've experienced both.

Wow. Can't that be medicated these days?

You just said it, no plans, conversation or anything..I don't like false hope from anyone. I don't want to fall in love with ideas.

Then superficial is what he wants.