Their True Source Of FEAR 

Dating as a man on the Autism Spectrum: www.patreon.com/posts/patreon-dating-71347040

Remember kids: attention is their crack, and accountability is their kryptonite

With age, Men find solitude delicious Women find it *HORRIFYING.*

I ended 4 of 5 of my relationships officially. Thing is: She checked out before that by cheating in at least 3 of those cases. So in reality she ended it, which changes the statistic drastically. I am pretty confident that this is true for many, if not most men.

When your first relationship is with a narcissist, you absolutely fear of getting together with a second one.

It ain't men that can't commit. And the data shows it.

Alexander is so right about trusting yourself and judgement. I'm an intelligent guy and thought I had things pretty well figured out. It rocked me to my core when I got totally played by a woman with a personality disorder. I didnt see the signs, and got blindsided with the manipulation. Its very humbling to learn just how much you DONT know. There is always someone out there better and more experienced at the game.

Thank you, Alex. I just ended a toxic relationship, because of creators like you. I needed this video so much to point me in the right direction.

Great content, Alexander. I had an ex with a PD. My failures included not holding firm to insisting on a psych evaluation and my adopting an appeasement strategy. As for men blaming others, many of us already take enough blame that many men are now refusing to be punching bags anymore. We’d like to see women accept an iota of responsibility and pick up their end of the couch for once.

Women can recover after a divorce, men have to start over

I'm one of those guys, who's given up on women completely. I really don't see why I should waste time and resources on them, when they are so reluctant to give anything back - or constantly looking for greener pastures.

Does this graph take into consideration how many of those relationships ended by men were because she cheated?

20 Minutes of gold my guy. I have 2 very close friends who I've gotten to know and later gotten married in the past 10 years. Both I inquired about their thoughts on a prenup and both times I got laughed at. One of the marriages is still going strong which is beautiful to see, but the other one, he got burned really hard and it was such an emotional toll on him legit had to have taken off like a year of his life. There is no excuse or argument against a prenup gents, if she isn't mature enough to agree to one with a lawyer present, then think twice about the marriage.

That has always been my biggest fear. Stallone’s 35 year old relationship just went down the drain.

I appreciate the rational pep talk. That said, I checked out of dating about 2 decades ago. I wasn't big on dating in the first place, and dates that I did have is when women asked me - which was flattering and baffling. Why would anyone want to date a science nerd? Alex, your videos help put all the messy variables in some sort of perspective. At this stage the best I can do is learn, improve myself, and push some boundaries. I recently started seeing a councilor/life coach (which was one of the bravest things I've ever done), who zeroed in on a few areas: diagnosing me with Asperger's as a high-functioning autistic and never feeling worthy of another's affection. The Asperger's explains why understanding others has always been a such a struggle - I just don't comprehend social cues that come to others intuitively. The difficulty processing subtle signals and lack of experience also plays into not feeling worthy. Now I better understand the 'why', the next hurdle is how to proceed. I am thankful for a wonderful extended family, amazing friends, and a successful career. I even became mayor of my town (as a scientist/engineer I love solving problems), recently stepping down to pursue other goals. My councilor notes that this shows resiliency and that even those with Asperger's can learn coping mechanisms and communication skills. Unfortunately I never figured out dating - there are just too many variables to sort out. Keep up the good work.

I agree with Alex to an extent. The problem is that it's wayyyy harder to meet people these days. So warm approach is challenging. If you slip up, you're on social media as a creep, or you lose your job. These are real-life NEW challenges that can't be ignored and told "Just get out there!" I know that's not what you fully mean. At the same time, most guys aren't even that scared of rejection or getting dumped. They're terrified that there is no literal zero legal or social burden of performance on the vvomen.

Imagine putting all those years, effort and resources into building a relationship just to have her leave half a life later! Happened to me! After a 10 year relationship she just left in the most horrible way! Ive been single ever since (4 years now)! I don’t see that changing! Im 34 now!

Heard a lot about pre nups being violated and invaludated in divorce courts by the judge itself. It's important that, first of all, you guys are sure you did not commit to the wrong woman. Brazil has a clause in marriage law that states that you have to decide if you're going to share your stuff or complete what is yours is yours, what's hers is hers, before matriage. So you'll walk off a failed marriage keeping all the stuff you bought in your name and there's nothing a sleazy divorce lawyer can do about it.

1 in 5 women cheat? You mean only 1 in 5 do something that they consider to be cheating; wait until you realize what they *don’t* count as cheating. For many women, they don’t count it as cheating unless they have an ongoing physical and emotional relationship with someone else and won’t even count that if they think they’re entitled to that “escape” from their relationship with you.

I have trust issues. I used to be morbidly obese, and as a baseline, I was rarely given the time of day by anyone who didn't just need something from me. When I lost 200-lbs, it was like I stepped into a whole new world where I was no longer invisible, but that identity of "I'm just a means to the ends of others" remained. And I know I've missed a lot of dating opportunities because I thought the woman was just being nice to me where in retrospect she was exhibiting a lot of choosing signals. When you've gone nearly your whole life and don't know what it's like for a woman to throw you such signals or one who openly flirts with you in a cold environment... you're going to assume they're just being nice. It's incredibly hard to get over that complex where you don't see yourself as a sexual being, but it's possible.

Alex I should probably clarify. I've been with my girlfriend for 5 yrs. At some point she wants to get married, something I never see myself doing. I told her at the very beginning of our relationship that I never wanted to get married. I don't want to become a bitter and hateful guy if the marriage doesn't workout.

Really needed this, never been in a relationship but seeing friends go in and out of relationships and the divorces that have happens with uncles and aunt (or prolong toxic marriages) really started doubting having a connection with any girl but. If you never believe a healthy relationship exist you will fail to see the signs of hope that could allow that to happen. I remember 2 girls from my high school who were amazing women and they have strong relationships going for 8-10 years. Seeing and having a healthy relationship with individuals teaches you what to look for in a relationship.

Interesting stats. Personally I've done the breaking up near 70% of my relationships and they all were in response to crazy mental abuse with a smattering of physical thrown in. The times I got dumped were all in high school and one in my early twenties. Im now 53 and 2 years out of realationship with a narcissist. I've "dated" a few times(having a bigger house/pool/ couple of cars, full head of no gray hair, 6'2", no belly, etc helps bring them in even at my age) but Im am done with attempting anything serious anymore. The other point of "meeting your soulmate/making the connection" is almost pointless. They ALL act like this, mostly convincingly, in the first 6-9 months and then start playing their game. Im personally not into always being on guard for trigger behaviours just to be in a "relationship". Time is precious.

If I ever develop a time machine, I'm going to send Alexander and his videos back to the 1990s to educate a lot of lost and struggling men. Buckle up buttercup!

Problem is if you have had a rough child hood and a relationship triggers some trauma left over I have found there is not much compassion or understanding and most people simply don't wanna deal with it. More often then not women will ignore the underlying condition and then make the behavior worse to use that against you and as justification for further emotional abuse. The sense of betrayal that left in me has kind of made me unwilling to take a chance again. Because I still have this anger inside of me, I can not move past it or forgive because what happened is not even acknowledged. Your video "Watch out for these 5 things women do" is an amazing example of how that went down with me.

Thanks for the top notch video. The fear in my case comes from the thought of being dumped and having half my stuff stolen to boot, sadly a common outcome for men these days. The prenup step is helpful but not a guarantee. I've heard too many stories of prenups being disregarded in family court depending on circumstances especially when children are involved. I don't believe for a moment the "1 in 5 cheaters" statistic based on my own observation of the couples around me. I suspect it is way higher, in fact it's the most common "nail in the coffin" ending to relationships (not root cause). Women are notorious for preparing their soft landing in advance of ending relationships.

I have to say that it was a truely inspirational video Alexander. I've been dealing with a bit of self-doubt these days but, thanks to friends, therapy, stoicism and videos like this, i feel like I'll slowly but surely manage to get these shitty, useless thoughts out of my head once and for all. Hope y'all have a great day ✌🏽✌🏽

From a man that did initiate his divorce, if she's not good for you get it together and f*cking leave! Fair enough, I think it cost me about 5 years to get it together but hell, it is way better than stay in a relationship that is toxic (even if there are kids involved). Take matters in your own hand.

Thank you for the content Alexander. I find it very informational and positive without blatant misogyny.

I initiated both of my divorces. As for serious girlfriends, it's about 50/50 . If they're too dramatic and/or manipulative, eventually (and, yes, sometimes it's taken me WAY too long - I'm ashamed to say because usually the sex was just too damn good!) I will get tired of their BS and pull the plug. Maybe I'm some kinda freak or something, but if someone stops loving me, or having my back, or emotionally abandons the relationship, I'll end it. P.S. There was no cheating (that I know of or suspected) on their part, and no cheating on mine. We appeared to be monogamous and faithful - but that is not enough. I'd rather be single than with someone I can't communicate with or don't have a good sex life with or who doesn't have my back, etc. etc. Get PICKY gentlemen!

It can be extremely difficult to have compassion for exes that were abusive towards you who left you because you were too boring only to see them crying around about how the new guy is so abusive towards her. And you know that 100% she just met someone just like her and she is triggering him. It's like... no, you need that level of negativity and negative passion or you can't feel loved. Being caring and respectful towards you but not engaging in negative tom-fuckery with to you means someone doesn't care.

"1 out of 5 women cheat on their partners." I don't believe that for a moment. That is a self-reported statistic. Three of my six serious relationships involved an unfaithful woman. Two of those women admitted to it, and I found out about the third after the fact. And who is to say about the three that I presume to have been faithful? Maybe I just never caught them.

I've dated dozens of girls and I've been the one to break up with them almost every time. I actually can't think of a serious relationship where they've broken up w me. There have been a couple of mutual breakups but even then, I was the one to initiate the conversation. I'm pretty sure I have a problem. I will say though, that I've been turned down by girls or theyve been disinterested at the onset, but I was quick to discover this right away and things didn't last more than a couple of weeks in those instances.

Great even-keeled video, thanks for sharing. Approach carefully, vet over time, and make no long-term plans over short-term feelings. I wish I had done this in the past.

I guess I'm just a weirdo because my main problem is that people just ignore me overall. I don't have a problem talking, socializing, being friendly, having a life, etc. But no amount of work ever goes anywhere with anyone. I try being nice, I try being cold, I try something more balanced. I try talking a lot, a little, moderately. I try becoming more pleasant, socially aware, more chill, more fun. It doesn't matter what I do, nothing works. The only thing I haven't done yet is move. And the only reason I consider it is because many people have suggested it to me because they think the area we live in is very narrow-minded in regard to personality.

I’ve only dumped one woman in my life. I have always been the one who was dumped. The only time I dumped a woman, I was in the wrong. She loved me, but I was dating more than one woman. My bad, but I couldn’t lead her on any more. I felt like a jerk so I broke up with her. The woman I dumped her for, dumped me, lol. Life is funny that way. I’m better now, I’m still with the same woman I married 28 years ago. I learned my lesson and value loyalty. I still feel the butterflies when I first met her. I learned what commitment really means, the hard way.

Great video, Alexander! Good information, and I also appreciate that you encourage introspection, rather than _only_ blaming others.

Great analysis Alexander! Some points that really spoke to me and how I need to reframe my thinking on dating

The cost of entry and maintenance is too great.

This was a brilliant video Alexander, I know it will help some men out there

Trust in oneself is #1 imo. And always listen to your intuition!

Great video, interesting and on point all the way through.

Even a good woman in a good relationship is still likely to be unfaithful.

The juice is not worth the squeeze.

When AG talks about "crushing it" in relationships please take it with this grain of salt or truth: when you enter into a union like marriage there remains that 1 out of 5 possibility that she may change her mind. Which makes learning as much as you can about relationship maintenance and repair imperative to improve your chances of success in vetting a marriage partner and the marriage relationship as well.

There's a bunch of ways for women to get out of a prenup. The prenup option is off the table. Some women are starting to realize, that the subtlety mind game doesn't work anymore. I understand wanting plausible deniability on your side; but if women want things to change, they need to be more upfront and not subtle in communicating what they want. It's just easier for everyone involved....

All of your 10 advice were really golden.

Love the video, Alexander. Thank you

In my dating life as a single I've only had one girl dump me after more than 2 dates vs maybe 10 times the other way, however I've been divorced 3 times by the woman's choice. Apparently, I can keep a girl as long as I want as long as I don't marry them!

That reality comment is 🔥 : We don’t live in reality, but in our perception of it. We can only possibly accommodate what we think we can. (paraphrased)

Prenups are not legally binding in most countries. Certainly nowhere in Europe that I know of.

I have too much anger in me as an hyper sensitive man, to date, i know how badly it could end. I never had any help so i just reacted to bullying by beating down people, i don't believe that i can restrain from violence if she disrespect me.

The problem with prenuptial agreements in the US is that judges do whatever they want in family courts. The prenup may be written very clear and a judge will order whatever he/she feels like ordering. It’s complete BS.

I'm in my 30's, I've improved a lot over the years and have much more work to do of course. I'm actually not in fear of what they could do, because life is a chance. All you can do is your best and pick up the pieces from there as best you can. But more I'm more annoyed with the overall unwarranted requirements and nothing to balance that out. Like overall many women have greater freedom which they should by all means have but also with greater responsibility, which typically conveniently filtered out (freedom with a little of its cost as possible). Holding a man to high standards but not themselves. I still love women for sure but truth be told establishing a family with biological children is the only reason I'm still interested in marriage. This the post chivalry world that men and women probably have to adapt to. A shame too since a highly woman is truly unstoppable (slight empathy, slight willingness to look acknowledge opposite perspectives, good judgment). Once again absolute love women and what they could and do bring to the table but this trail by fire free for all is quite concerning. Thanks for the video mate, I appreciate the channel the perspective you bring to the table and particularly within this video.

Great Chanel, great information. Please make a happy video about how a healthy relationship looks and feels.

If you intend to get in a relationship remember that up to 50% of your "values" will have to be sacrificed to make way for up to 50% of their "values", and you should hold your ground and not budge on the >50% of your "values" that matter the most to you. Your partner SHOULD do the same. If your "core values" (up to that 50% mark) don't work with your partners' (i.e. you are at odds over something) decide if it's a make-or-break situation, something either of you can relent on (after much discussion), or something you can HAPPILY fight over (and make up over) and relax into keeping the argument going on-and-off for the rest of your life together (it becomes the "bickering like an old married couple" thing). Take as much time as you need to put things in their rightful place in your relationship together - especially having to incorporate the other person's lifestyle/job/hobbies/etc. into YOUR routine daily life. Make a habit of asking how they are doing, or listening as they tell you what matters to them/what they did that day, and do it DAILY. Knowing that you care enough to listen to their day/problems/successes is a great way to "touch base", keep updated, and requires little effort for great reward. It won't all be YOUR way, but it also shouldn't be all THEIRS. Learn when to concede the point, and when to hold your ground because it really matters to YOU.

I have never been dumped. I been blown off by women and flaked on, but never been straight up dumped... That's because I was the one who realized I had to get out.

Old guy was on it, even as young as a teen the problem with commiting is NOT lack of variety, it's fear of investing a ton of effort and energy into a woman who just leaves you

Thanks bro great advice

Alex, I have a question. Why do women commit suicide when they are rejected in a relationship? The reason I'm asking this is that in Asia, in some parts of the countries I always hear stories of a woman committing suicide when she gets rejected when they are in a relationship. Some are normal ones and some are mistresses or the third wheel. If things work on hypergamy for them, then "logically" speaking they shouldn't be throwing their lives away, no? Or perhaps those guys are the ones they really wanted and they messed up and use suicide as a means to win him back? Still, it doesn't make any sense. Or does this not apply to "modern" women and they have evolved into being more materialistic? Care to share some insight on this part?

Fantastic video Alex, appreciate it.

16:30 "If she has committed to you" Its impossible for the non provider to commit. Commitment implies consequence for failure. There is no consequence for failure for the non provider. In modern marriages its only the provider that commits. Its a one sided commitment. Keep in mind its not just half the wealth at the time of divorce. Its support, possibly in perpetuity.

This was a great spot on video.

I have been watching this channel a long time and I genuinely can't work out if the videos are inspiring or massively disheartening. I basically have zero relationship experience and while the information seems solid, I have no idea how to apply it. Best I can work out is I'd likely have to ditch my current circle of friends entirely and start over from scratch, hoping that I'll be able to work my way into a more well connected group of people, but the chances of that succeeding seem quite low. It feels like what's necessary is a complete overhaul of my personhood that I'm not sure I'm capable of. When it comes to getting relationship practice the rules appear different for every woman and breaking them seems like it could lead to consequences ranging from basically nothing all the way to losing my job or potentially losing my freedom depending on how the woman and the legal system are feeling that day. Is the risk low? sure I suppose statistically it would be but it still feels like a constant threat looming over my head for misjudging a situation which I will likely do many, many times. This leaves me in a situation where I must constantly rely on the forgiveness of people who are essentially strangers who hold significant legal authority over me. Assuming I clear these hurdles or roadblocks in my head somehow, I don't believe prenups are very effective at all in Canada. I'd have to have a long talk with a lawyer but to my knowledge there are many avenues to be taken to get around prenups should a relationship fall through. I don't believe I'd be able to trust any one person enough to hand over legal custody of my financial stability to them. I have to trust that they won't change their mind in five, ten or twenty years, and that's before the question of kids even comes up. In a relationship I would now be legally responsible for someone else's choices. The only ways I can work out of ensuring I'm not baby trapped are to either have no intimate relations or have a vasectomy done before I even attempt to have relationships with women and adopt a child if it ever came to the point that I feel like I could raise one. Stories of women attempting to impregnate themselves with used condoms or lying about birth control seem to be increasingly common and I don't believe that I would always be able to identify someone who'd do that to me before it's too late. This sort of scenario is probably the greatest fear weighing on me and it's something that could happen far to easily in the "Practicing having a relationship" phase. Finally am I in that bottom 20%? I have no idea, I can't see myself from the outside. Maybe all the things I mentioned above mark me as someone of low quality, I couldn't say. It's entirely possible I've been living in a little bubble all my life and the folks around me are just that much better at managing things than I am. It certainly seems that way sometimes when I see the people around me raising families and such. Seems like I've missed the boat by a huge margin and there's little chance of my catching up. I've worked on myself physically and lost about 70 pounds but that'd hardly solve any internal hang-ups I have and so here I am. I watch and consider the information I'm told and wonder if I'll ever be in a position to apply it. If my perceived situation will improve or if I'm merely expected to soldier through all these massive, potentially stability crippling pitfalls in order to achieve a healthy relationship somehow. Seems unfair to me but I could just be winging about things that are easily overcome. If anyone has any suggestions feel free to share.

This is 100% the reason men do not want commitment. Once bitten...never trusting again.

This video was full of content, cheers.

Thankfully in the years since my divorce I've learned a lot from channels like yours. I now know what I need to be able to vet and select a quality woman but I don't have the desire to put in that effort anymore so I've just taken myself out of the dating market. I guess that's a whole different problem, I just don't see it being worth the time and effort

I believe it's possible. I believe the lottery is possible to win, too. Neither seem wise to treat as everyday beliefs though.

This video should be titled: general guide for relationship.

Great content!

Killer channel bro, thank you.

I would say it's much higher than 1 in 5 women cheating. I know women who've cheated that aren't even honest with themselves about it, let alone others. The hampster wheel is strong with many women!

Well said.

Learn to have conflicts and solve them in a healthy way. Thats SOOOO important. Have a spine! Have clear opinions. Learn to choose your fights. Have no problem to give in, BUT when it is important than stay your ground. DO not let her dictate the relationship.

Rebuilding again after marriage number two. I'm 57-years-young. Eighteen months left training for my A&P. Well on my way back to a 6-figure income after ageing out of the SPECOPS security sector. Guys, for God's sake protect yourselves in your relationships! That sweet curvy godess of hotness may very well get lazy, bored, develop addictions, or just go batshit crazy aftet a decade or so being together with you. Own your own home by your 20's, girlfriend until your 30's, Prenup and put your home and toys in a trust if/when you ever marry. Don't be like me, close to 60, no home, restarting a career, because you trusted that sweet little thing. Just know that not one of them can be trusted and can and will depart with as much of your life's rewards as they can take with them.

I ended all my relationships, why? If I don't feel comfortable in them I leave.

A good lawyer can dismiss a prenup so not a good option ever. Virtually useless

Hi Alexander. I applaude your optimism. However, due to decades of (extreme) feminism, becoming 'woke', cancel culture and the demonisation of men, the reality is somewhat different. I recently become a widower, after having the love of a good woman for 30+ years. I have no interest in the 'modern woman'. From what I have seen (and its getting worse), I agree with huggleskuishy comment below. "Remember kids: attention is their crack, and accountability is their kryptonite." I think that your viewers could also gain some benefit from another channel "Better Bachelor". The legal framework in Australia is gambling at best, while Family Law Courts are a horror show. I do like your 10 steps and think if men (especially young men) follow your advice, they will be far better prepared. My advice is to find and follow your purpose in life. Be very, very careful and wary of the women that come along. Be very careful where you 'plant' your seed. Remember, women have ten holes, but can only get pregnant in one. And if you really have to get married - prenup!

"don't screw it up" bahaha as if they told you in advance xDDD i thought i've found the most intelligent, kind-hearted and fun woman. in the end, she dumped me for some other dude who will not even acknowledge her as his girlfriend, and she dumped me extremely rudely even. women are hellspawn.

I was thinking about the prenup stuff and obviously Alexander we have talked about that before and you know I support mandatory marriage prenups to avoid certain people from being singled out and to support the wealthier person in the relationship from being financially taken for a ride. But I do understand why women would be upset being asked to sign one as it does come across as you not being trustworthy. Years ago if my partner asked me for one I would have felt attacked, not because I secretly want any money he has but it does come across as “I don’t trust you”. I understand now that many men want them and it isn’t an attack on me and I am more secure so if my partner asked for one now I would understand. I am just saying to guys if they want a prenup and their woman gets upset, not to assume she wants your money, there is a lot of feelings there so try and navigate the situation in a way that you aren’t attacking her and tbh I would bring it up early in the relationship if you are discussing possibly a marriage that you would want a prenup, that way it isn’t sprung on her

Really good video!

8:35 Responsibility is a good topic you're brought here

Any good woman will sign a prenup. Huge red flag if she won’t.

There's no quality control on "reputable" dating sites.

0:46 These stats dont add up, The percentages dont add up

BC women want a heart centered connection at the soul ... and that's a lot harder to get and maintain! Also bc we men are not only NOT TAUGHT how to connect heart and soul- we men are actively DISCOURAGED from learning how to access ours and others feelings and intuition!

Could you link this study?

Look, I've easily ended 75 percent of my relationships but the women "stole" the breakup because women's egos are VERY fragile. And i let them "have" the breakup because there is NOTHING more dangerous than a dumped woman. They will smear you at the very least and at worst...well, no man likes the taste of the hood of a police cruiser. So...I would take self-reported statistics from women about this (or anything else) with an ENORMOUS grain of salt. These are very fragile people with little or no capacity for self-reflection or accountability. And that makes them DANGEROUS.

For the most part, Chads and Tyrones dump women. Most men are happy to be in a relationship. Women can easily leave a guy because she can get another easily.

Women are treacherous. They’ll love you one minute, and leave you the next. Could be 5-10-20+ years. You’re never safe unless she has NO options. And even then.

"Us human beings, we don't really live in reality. We live in our perception of reality, and only things that we believe are possible for us are actually ever going to occur" 🤯

Maybe it's the Christian upbringing, and all the chuch and bible reading, but as much as I'd like to blame the woman, I know much, of not most of it may be my fault. I'm used to being told to take the blame for most everything. So, my favorite videos of yours, as much as they may sting, are the ones where you let us know we may not be ready for romance. One of the videos I value the most of yours is that pyramid one (steps for getting a girlfriend, or something) where you talk about the things we need to first have before we get into relationships (strong male friends, strong female friends, self esteem, etc... [I may be mixing the content of more than one of your videos]) because this is some the most important information we need.

End? or destroy?

If you have to sign a second contract to protect your self from the first then its probaly not a good contract. Second women are insentivized to break the marriage contract which is why the account for 80 percent of them

Logic part is bad, woman can get more than half(and some of this you build ALONE before you meet her) + kids, thats the point(he was abusive, done).

I'm actually really good at sorting out bad women I think. So my issue is less that I'll get into a relationship that ends badly because of them, and more that I'll never find a good one that actually reciprocates my feelings. Because many of the ones that are actually wife material for me don't know how to pick men and are still chasing the wrong ones.

Shits impossible, gave up 10 years ago at 26

I think the root causes are deeper than that. The problem when you find yourself in a situation of uncertitudes with a partner are most likely linked to the fact that you may have chosen the wrong partner. At that point you need to do some major work on yourself before engaging in another relationship otherwise the pattern will repeat itself.

Considering the condition of the modern world its just to much of a liability and headache

No marriage, no religion, I'm free.