They Come & Go | The Tim Dillon Show

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Tim wades into whether Meghan Markle cooked up a paparazzi chase, shares why dogs should be barred from restaurants and where Bud Light’s advertising may be heading.
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Опубликовано:

12 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 1,2 тыс.

@serenus6633 Год назад

Plastic Burger King cup filled with red wine, sitting in a plastic lawn chair, cigarette in one hand, phone in the other. Ready for Tim Dillon. Life in the big city.

@AdamThoba2 Год назад

this isnt' 2019 anymore...that is 4 years old....move on...

@watevatube Год назад

Ignore the last reply, you're peak Tim Dillon mode right now, enjoy

@saibamanP Год назад

Our collective spirit animal manifested

@peachmelba1000 Год назад

Shit, I just made a huge pan of cookies. I'd trade you half of 'em for one ciggy. Haven't had one in years, but every once in a while I'll blast one. I have Chianti, so I'll just get drunk and eat cookies.

@kjp1801 Год назад

Facts ignore the first comment u are speaking for all of our spirit animals.

@tommyoneill9761 Год назад

Another lecture at Tim Dillon University. This is type of college education we deserve.

@houseofhas9355 Год назад

TDU the only college where you get into a sub prime mortgage with wells Fargo, and student debt for a degree that makes fake business fun.

@oN3xShOtxkilL Год назад

I just graduated with my Masters in Fake Business Adminstration today from TDU

@Nitrotix1 Год назад

It's what I assume people want when they screech that they deserve free education while foaming at the mouth

@MilahanPhilosophersCorner Год назад

Yaas.

@StigmaX Год назад

You should feel bad for saying "we deserve" in your comments.

@j-fo4753 Год назад

Tim practices a level of self love & body positivity that Lizzo could only dream of possessing.

@Ddhdhdjdh Год назад

That means having a mature enough mental capacity she severely lacks

@indoorgangster Год назад

lizzo has her whistle.

@jmua8450 Год назад

@@indoorgangster The Obesity Oboe

@j-fo4753 Год назад

@@jmua8450 😅omg. Ribs broken from laughter, that was so naughty!😆

@isaactuuri6488 Год назад

when i was fat i was a hot fatty, when i was skinny i was a hot skinny, now im a hot dad bod, fuck'em

@eugeniamaurajames1907 Год назад

Tim’s happy face while he’s watching the fight at Disney World is the cutest thing ever! “I like to hear the screams.” 🤣🤣🤣

@Alexis_-_ Год назад

"Some people think it was six million, but here at Bud Light we haven't seen the numbers. We're simply saying that history's never what any one person thinks." Laughed out loud so many times.

@tdan86 Год назад

😂😂😂

@Buk99 Год назад

An epic stream of consciousness ad, delivered in a creepily hushed southern accent. Love you, Tim 😂

@fulcanelli8352 Год назад

that whole bit had me crying with laughter .. so great.

@MrPihabeach Год назад

Epic

@acs78393 Год назад

"600 or 6 million, it's still a tragedy" -Adam Eget

@codylawler2652 Год назад

Im going to quote Tim Dillon when im arrested for fraud.

@chaselepard Год назад

It's all fake business

@Beardlythekind Год назад

Just hire him as your African American trans lawyer

@AdamThoba2 Год назад

cops will say "who"????????????????????????

@AdamThoba2 Год назад

who? they will say...is he matt dilons brother? from something about mary...cops ARE OLD AND BUSY>>>THEY DONT WATCH youtube 24--7

@dcb420 Год назад

"your honor, that's just life in the big city for ya"

@chizobamokeke9461 Год назад

That Budlight bit is classic Tim brilliance! This whole episode was FIRE 🔥 😂

@ZachAttack2U Год назад

The bud light bit starts @ 1:02:21 You're welcome 🤣👍

@lucacerasuolo6606 Год назад

An all-time great 6 minutes 😂.

@MRZE506 Год назад

@@lucacerasuolo6606 thanks 😊

@ania5038 Год назад

I'm currently lmao

@joshuagoldstein8116 Год назад

I'm a Jew and almost spit the food out of my mouth while laughing when he made up the Bud Light commercial being skeptical of 6 million Jews dying: "Bud Light....make up your own number."

@carpeimodiem Год назад

If someone somewhere doesn't make a series of bud light commercials from all these, then the internet is over.

@mkader2494 Год назад

he kept the best for last. savage.

@jayweiss4378 Год назад

😂 Agree…Tim was on fire this episode

@philipp-q5f Год назад

@Wonkelton same

@username-tv6uw Год назад

6mill seems kinda high when you do the math. 6 million through a few a wooden doors?

@OutTheTrenchesPod Год назад

Story just broke that it was actually Megan and Harry chasing down a reporter in their car. We wish them well!

@CJSteib Год назад

Too fked up to have any idea if this is a joke and its ripping me apart

@stephanietaylor6248 Год назад

👏🏼😂

@josephhuman7390 Год назад

Megan and Harry where conducting Fake journalism.

@dwightschrute7021 Год назад

🏌️

@TRG29338 Год назад

I'll just assume that's not true but I have no confidence in either possibility.

@elongatedmusket7430 Год назад

I told my friends a few nights ago that people are replacing Personalities with Activism for identity. This was spot on, Tim.

@Alexis_-_ Год назад

"We've gotten to a point where even the dogs want to know what's going on with these freaks taking them everywhere. Even the dogs are like, why am I on a plane?"

@HitRockBoglim Год назад

"life in the big city" -Dog probably

@ericknabenshue5689 Год назад

At budlight we believe in American traditional values like not taking your dogs in restaurants and leaving them outside to attack minorities entering the restaurants..... Bud light

@d3rpyboi Год назад

*“You better stay the fuck out of the Beverly Hills Hotel.”* -Tim Dillon

@MARTINSTERN Год назад

“There’s a dignity in just not trying to force an animal to be your bf, or gf, or child” Tim Dillon

@evanj9519 Год назад

"bud light. find your own number" had me in tears

@liverbrains Год назад

"All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone" - Blaise Pascal, Pensées

@xbabu142x Год назад

"Sometimes you dont' think it be like it is but it do.

@miroirs-jumeaux Год назад

@@xbabu142x«You know what I'm saying?»

@nocturnalhuman92 Год назад

I love how Tim is a gentle and caring soul while simultaneously being a savage

@jayweiss4378 Год назад

Tim Dillon is like that School Teacher we actually enjoyed listening to!

@rogerwilco1777 Год назад

..ha i remember a guy like him, his only requirement was that we had to have a piece of paper and pencil on the desk incase the principal was coming down the hall and we had to 'pretend' like we were doing 'something'.. if he caught you smoking in the bathroom, he would bum a smoke and smoke with you.. i still remember he smoked camel wides

@ChristIsKing772 Год назад

@@rogerwilco1777every school has at least one teacher the burnouts can have a free period w. i miss my french teacher bro was cool

@mkatepaski9947 Год назад

Dianas driver was 3 x over the legal limit. No one mentions this level of intoxication ever.

@frenchygigi Год назад

And she wasn't wearing a seat belt, same way Megan Smollet and crew weren't wearing seat belts.🙄

@youngscrimmage6632 Год назад

Tim Dillon is a national treasure

@lucacerasuolo6606 Год назад

The last 6 minutes (the reimagined Bud Light ads) are phenomenal 😂.

@ARDG89 Год назад

national? global.

@sangyedorje Год назад

Writing from Bhutan - international

@luisfromtexas6674 Год назад

Watching from the 8 parallel universes down from y'all. This show is great, quick question why is yalls universe allowing 997787678866997799 to happen soon and where are the people going to go.

@AmericanClass1776 Год назад

Yes Joe Rogan already said that think of an original compliment Tim would appreciate it!

@BrokeAfSenpai Год назад

Just did my first catering job, everything went niiiiice. Got home after a few brews, smoked a nicely rolled joint, and saw Timmy D uploaded. I haven’t had an amazing day like this in a long long time.I appreciate you 🫡

@JerrybearTV Год назад

Sounds good brotha 👍

@pin65371 Год назад

Congrats on the job. Everyone deserves a joint after a long day of work.

@jonnygranville281 Год назад

What are you catering?

@fredocuomo5386 Год назад

@@jonnygranville281 bologna and cheese

@paulineackermann2598 Год назад

Life is good.~:>

@dhedges1340 Год назад

The reason I love this show is how Tim can transition from hilarious rants to describing incredibly detailed, painful thoughts and stories that show his realness and background. No matter how expensive his glasses are or the wealth he is around and experiences, Tim always reveals himself as a relatable, funny guy that many people would love to hangout with or consider a friend.

@peppino1961 Год назад

Always so good to see this guy do his thing. I look forward to his podcast every week,

@ContentRemoved___ Год назад

Yup. I’ve given up on life too.

@matthewcurry3565 Год назад

@@ContentRemoved___I think the most sane have.

@peppino1961 Год назад

@@ContentRemoved___ A long long time ago my friend.

@thatguyoverthere2755 Год назад

Same. I'm a listener

@TeddyBremmer Год назад

Life in the big city

@francisteardrop Год назад

“Bud Light…find your own number.”

@Franknakano7 Год назад

The dog bit was so fantastic. My workplace is "dog friendly" and the cowoeker who works in the same office as I do brings his dog every day. The dog doesn't bother me at all but we work in a cramped office and it just ends up smelling like dog every day. Another guy works general warehouse and it just seems like a liability for a dog to be around forklifts and heavy objects.

@toby9999 Год назад

Having a dog in the office would be hell.

@Will_Smith_Slapping_Xi_Jinping Год назад

I'd sue for a hostile work environment and emotional distress. You don't even have to complain or warn them. As you didn't feel your career would be safe to. It doesn't matter if it's a Pug or a Chihuahua.... you can sue; because the rights of others don't supercede yours, as well. Say you're terrified of dogs, and or that your Muslim.

@Krim707 Год назад

@@Will_Smith_Slapping_Xi_Jinping Love that

@giddy-jv9gr Год назад

as tim's only female asian fan, i appreciate every slop served ❤

@HitRockBoglim Год назад

Tim doesn't have any female asian fans. Fake business.

@mikeadams3305 Год назад

You’re worth 1000 of us

@KarmaZeusBoi Год назад

This is some hot tea about the Markles. Keep it coming Tim!

@FormerFootballer Год назад

I'm so glad he said something about people bringing dogs everywhere!

@florentinaw1707 Год назад

Me toooooooooooooooo I am sick and tired of people expecting us to just be fine with their dogs I don’t push my shit on you Don’t do it

@satchpizza Год назад

Tim should have a Judge Judy type tv show.

@miroirs-jumeaux Год назад

He does! What do you think you're watching? Too bad about the bailiff though.

@4363HASHMI Месяц назад

Judge Mo Dollas

@joehansen13 Год назад

If you keep ‘em fat and unhealthy, you keep ‘em medicated. Fat phobia: brought to you by your friends at big pharma

@TRG29338 Год назад

There it is folks. Life in the big city.

@bubbytumby8509 Год назад

1:02:22 I have never laughed harder in my entire life than the crazy bud light commercials that Tim was coming up with

@Truth_World99 Год назад

I like to imagine Tim wears glasses like this to thanksgiving and just makes fun of his aunt

@jeffp.6908 Год назад

I am betting he intentionally gets her loaded so she will run her mouth so he can go off

@digitalsalsas Год назад

kathleen

@paulineackermann2598 Год назад

Lol.~;>

@TeddyBremmer Год назад

She deserves every bit of it. Honoring the grandpa.

@hrs1414 Год назад

Keep my name out your mouth

@miamihurricane865 Год назад

Harry: "What do we do now, love?" Megan: "I'm calling the Jesse Smolett hotline............."

@MemoROFL Год назад

As soon as Markle came up I knew this was going to be a complete banger

@bena1826 Год назад

I'm really fat and it's awful. Being "fat positive" or whatever is like being cancer positive

@TRG29338 Год назад

That's next

@BobbyHiII Год назад

If Alex Jones was a gay hipster.

@miroirs-jumeaux Год назад

if?

@rachellegraham9619 Год назад

The bud light finale had me dying 🤣🤣

@mierezsaturday1452 Год назад

One of the best black performance artists out there.

@coolzredz Год назад

I was not ready 😂 when he started talking about the cats 😂🐱

@xbabu142x Год назад

You think the cats were ready for what happened? Have some understanding and sympathy bud, how else am I going to get a nice well-made medium rare steak for a good price now that Horses is closed?!

@Ddhdhdjdh Год назад

@@xbabu142x try cat, might taste good

@francisteardrop Год назад

“Bud Light…stick with your own.”

@johannykiara Год назад

Tim you’re spot on with the dogs situation! I went to a mall and I thought I walked in a pet store dogs everywhere one was not even on a leash running around and harassing people it’s very annoying for other people to impose their pets on others, take them to a park or for a walk but c’mom supermarket, restaurant, mall, hotel, plane it’s getting out of control. I like to enjoy a meal outdoors without a dog barking and shedding hair next to me. Thank you

@DaWAFFLES1 Год назад

Dogs that don’t listen to commands or behave well should be left at home, but other than that this is America buddy, don’t like it leave.

@johannykiara Год назад

@@DaWAFFLES1 don’t impose your pets on other people that’s all I’m saying

@pernauldthevisch5907 Год назад

@@DaWAFFLES1 you sound like the type of person who spikes up the back of their hair and owns an airbnb property with oddly shaped chairs

@Unanythang Год назад

41:19 the kids are fighting the parents in the video too lmao.

@BobDan1234 Год назад

" Fatness" has never existed before 1968-1970. No one was fat before the 70's. Fatness and Beauty is technically NOT subjective. Measurements of your biological physique to adequate levels of weight is measured for "good health". People like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jollie as classic examples have facial symmetry measured to "Beauty" by their face and body dimensions and proportions which is biologically engrained for evolutionary fitness and reproduction. Conclusion: Fat people are fat people by choice and it is deadly to everybody so the shaming must happen. IQ points go down as Pounds go up.

@isaidpianissimo2475 Год назад

So since Tim has gotten bigger lately, that means TO YOU NOT ME that he's gotten dumber? Something wrong with your theory.

@danheckman8265 Год назад

👍👍

@WuhSuhDood Год назад

Tim Dillon making fun of all the Tim Diillons he sees at Disney World is the most Tim Dillon thing

@Gibby5280 Год назад

Tim has never had a better rant then his dog rant. 100000000000 agree.

@Ryan-yn3hi Год назад

Just got home from a night of drinking and took my sleeping pills can’t wait to feel the sense of accomplishment when I make it to the end of this session.

@Tsmith183 Год назад

Hit the nail on the head regarding the service animal piece. Ppl out here just lying about their animals and have the audacity to complain when they get shutdown by the employees who ask for docs.

@SpunkiProductions Год назад

Loved the dog rant. Thanks Tim

@chilidog727 Год назад

Getting a service dog is as legit as getting a prescription for marijuana 😂

@MatthewSmith-zx6uk Год назад

Or Oxy. Lmfao.

@JD-5250 Год назад

I have a service bunny lol

@OSheaGlobalAlliances Год назад

So help me if that ginger shows up at the Beverly Hills Hotel while I’m having my soufflé…

@bbluva20 Год назад

The look of joy on Tim’s face when watching the Disney fight gives me more energy than coffee.

@bbluva20 Год назад

Those Bud Light commercials by Tim are killing me. He’s on a roll.

@areyoutheregoditsmedave Год назад

he’s right about people using dogs as surrogates for meaningful human relationships. it’s really sad and likely is a symptom of something truly vital being deeply damaged.

@inextinguishablemoltenblooded Год назад

Excellent observation , the multi billion dollar pet industry is counting on that misdirected paternity

@cecilyerker Год назад

If people’s abilities to have meaningful relationships with other humans is damaged by humans, then having a dog as your best friend makes sense

@areyoutheregoditsmedave Год назад

@@cecilyerker its not bad to have a dog best friend. id consider myself in that category. but when people treat their animals like they are human children, or use them as an emotional crutch, then it starts getting into pathological territory. and you can see this everywhere. dogs are great. i love all animals in fact. but they are not human beings and they cant replace human relationships. they aren’t children. that’s demented.

@HitRockBoglim Год назад

@@areyoutheregoditsmedave but BennyBoi the cat is my baby

@paulfroelich1024 Год назад

00:47 I rolled my head back and laughed toward the ceiling. Absolutely hilarious.

@yourdogisbeautiful5845 Год назад

My knife fight shirt I bought from Tim in November for 55 dollars ripped in half. It was worn twice and washed once. This man’s commitment to being a low-level huckster, even as he makes millions, is truly inspiring.

@Ddhdhdjdh Год назад

You trusted someone with a Long Island accent. Lesson learned

@Kanggaxx Год назад

Life in the big city

@FinnegansCake Год назад

It's probably Ben's fault.

@yourdogisbeautiful5845 Год назад

@@FinnegansCake every day I wish he would come back just so Tim could fire him in a rage again

@WaKeUpTIs Год назад

Thank you for this week’s Patreon episode Tim, one of my all time favorites

@inyourgranmaass3605 Год назад

Damnn

@garymericano Год назад

@@inyourgranmaass3605go to kemono and steal it like the cool kids!

@sheilaperrone7654 Год назад

She brought the paps with her per Hertz CEO. Yep; you're right, I just heard you lol. GREAT SHOW! Thanks for speaking the truth. It's refreshing

@joshoree8960 Год назад

That Bud Light skit at the end was a the cherry on top of this podcast.

@BryanJordan1 Год назад

The bud light bit at the end is one of the funniest bits I've ever heard. This episode is a 10/10

@meiermichael Год назад

"But if you look at the shapes of peoples skulls.....they're different". ---------should have gotten a way bigger laugh from the producer... my god that was funny

@animeryn Год назад

1:04:10 nothing brings me more joy than seeing Tim crack hard from his own joke😂😂😂😂😂😂💖

@MrRanch-fc2pe Год назад

The bud light bit broke me. Non stop laughter. God I love Tim Dillon.

@ernestrivers3736 Год назад

Tim teaches a master class in sass every episode.

@ernestrivers3736 Год назад

Find your own number..lol😂

@stpdncr Год назад

“We wish them well” lol 😂

@jmua8450 Год назад

Tim is right: Being alone is fucking awesome. Fewer people, fewer problems.

@HeavyJudy Год назад

Those bud light reads were gold 😂

@kelamanjaro1 Год назад

The bud light segment had me howling 😂😂😂😂😂 We are doomed 😂

@MFJoneser Год назад

The craziest part is Boebert is an example of a politician accurately representing their constituents lol

@dukx3986 Год назад

She lives 30 minutes from me in town called rifle. Your assessment is accurate.

@claudiabarter6697 Год назад

Just like AOC does

@tdan86 Год назад

Greatest ending to a podcast of all time I’m in tears 😂😂😂

@LPyellowking Год назад

thank god for the 2008 s&l collapse for giving us the Tim Dillon Show

@kathleenp3135 Год назад

😂perfect!

@milenkocovic Год назад

Tim's evil laugh before his comments on the Disney story is golden

@BlazRa Год назад

Yes stop trying to replace a kid with a dog also don't bring your kid to public places either😂

@ggez6087 Год назад

i cried for the last 25 min Tim Dillon you did it again.

@justinboudreau5266 Год назад

I would think that it would be physically impossible to be in a high speed chase in NYC during the day. Unless on a movie set.

@nathanpitek3177 Год назад

“Bud Light, was the number really 6 million? Bud Light”

@Yugigreg Год назад

Bro I DIED at “it’s a tale as old as time” 😂😂😂

@gd1406 Год назад

I could listen to Tim all day every day!! Much Love!

@joeyjonesSoCal Год назад

“Bud light, pick a number you’re comfortable with.” Ded

@captainDL3 Год назад

Just finished the whole episode. It was your best yet!!

@Thiefik121 Год назад

lol

@CoreyHart13 Год назад

Watched it on that 32.5x speed huh? Did he mention Delia's Rolling stone article by chance? 😂

@captainDL3 Год назад

@@CoreyHart13 my favorite part was when the rolling stone article stole Tim’s glasses and they broke.

@user-mq1up2fw4r Год назад

Nah his Gates of Hell episode is GOAT'd, nothing will ever come close

@captainDL3 Год назад

@@user-mq1up2fw4r you’re getting locked in a cage with brittney for this comment. Godspeed.

@Life_of_Matthew Год назад

Tim's laugh at 1:04:12 is everything to me

@Mat3ykaaa Год назад

Our fearless leader is back

@GODFATHER0666 Год назад

Definitely beatin it to this later

@isaidpianissimo2475 Год назад

It's not a cat. It's a pod.

@alanprobsten2858 Год назад

I so freaking look forward to the drop every week and I’m never disappointed. Tim Dillon is a genius and his take is always respectable. F yeah bro

@jopo7996 Год назад

Officer Barbrady has really good energy today.

@Biggus_Dickus42 Год назад

the thought of a vehicle even being able to get above 30 MPH in midtown is hilarious let alone a hours long chase xD

@ethanpoole2212 Год назад

If Tim was a super villain, his name would be Dr. Cynic. Man I’m glad I’m not him. Love him tho. He’s our modern day Jesus. As much as that sucks.

@coomanderkeen299 Год назад

Give me an hour of continuous Bud Light slogans

@RobMcGravyTrain Год назад

Can’t wait for the 400th episode when Tim has Meghan Markle on as a guest

@brandonblanquez9224 Год назад

Great show as always but can't take my eyes of those glasses everytime light shines on them

@liverbrains Год назад

The fact that man now thinks he can rewrite the inaccessible and subjective laws of the "biology of beauty" via made-up terms like "fatphobia" is such a huge regression in human logic I fear for the dismal future of thought

@thizzizwutitizz Год назад

Budlight bit was hilarious 😂

@billiondollardan Год назад

I used to listen to Tim for his comedy... now it's the deep and philosophical views of humanity and our country that draw me in

@user-yr1tj9cm1w Год назад

All of the above!

@j.farrell Год назад

Trash goes to Disney like upper middle class people save for a trip to Europe.

@LetThereBeCode. Год назад

There's dignity in Tim ranting all alone, you rock man.

@matthewcurry3565 Год назад

No one is ever on on saturdays. Thank god tim.

@timothyjackson6465 Год назад

I hate how we live in a time where Tim does his contrarian bit about how people would rather not be fat. 😂

@joshhayes5728 Год назад

We live in a clown world where someone like Tim has to point out the absurdity around "fat phobia"...yeah you should be scared of being fat...heart disease is the number 1 killer in the USA