Watch this before you have a baby. 

When a child is raised by a parent who resents them, they don’t hate the parent, they end up hating themselves. Selfish parents negatively impact their children in a profound way, so this message needs to be spread far and wide

I agree with almost all of this! HOWEVER, and maybe it's a separate conversation, but I do believe that it's really important to stress that a mother absolutely SHOULD support herself adequately by pursuing her own interests and taking the time to take care of her own body, mind, and soul. It should not lead to your children being deprived obviously, but it needs to be a priority that both you and your husband push for so that you don't get burnt out. 🌷

I love this so much, your so honest… I’m only a 17 year old Christian girl but I want children … I’m a little scared because people tell me it’s hard but rewording but no one explains what makes it hard and that it’s ok, Its ok to have enough but u have to push through and not be so selfish, now days it’s all about us us us . Thank you 🫶🏽

I did everything natural and had a natural birth and found breastfeeding easy, I stayed at home and found it easier to just put everything into my kids, I loved it but also found some parts sooo difficult a dealing with screaming baby or toddler when you are exhausted is harder than I ever imagined. So glad I was a stay at home mother as now I have teenage kids I see how much difference it has made, they are so easy to get on with and I didn't really have any of the 'teenager problems' that we a lead to believe are normal and I put it down to having such a stable home-life

I'm just over 39 weeks pregnant with my first baby and I'm so glad I watched this video. I know the transition will be hard but I want to do what is best for my child. He deserves a momma who wants him.

My ex and I decided to have a baby and I got pregnant with my daughter had an awful pregnancy that was extremely hard on my body. My birth and breastfeeding journey was very easy but the lack of sleep the pressure to still cook every meal and clean while working with little to no help from my ex made me go literally insane. I had wanted to be a mother for so long and postpartum almost took all my joy. Discovering my child father cheated on me during the height of my PPD at 5 month was the literally icing on the cake to my misery. Her dad even threw in my face when we broke up "you are the one that wanted her." it still disgusts me. I was so lost and did not know how I could be a mother alone and depressed. I too thought I should surrender my daughter at points. However, almost 2 years later with Gods grace I promise I have never been better physically, mentally and financially. I am the happiest I have ever been. God has changed my heart so much. I am truly the best version of myself and without that massive change I went through I would never be here. Motherhood like you said has made me face flaws I did not realize I had and made me 1000% a better human. I even have met and started dating the man of my dreams who loves and accepts my daughter.

38 weeks pregnant and so thankful for this video! ❤️🙏🏼

I'm on my fourth pregnancy right now, and I can tell you that the transition from not being a mother to being a mother is the hardest thing. Every additional kid is actually easier, in my opinion. I fell into alcoholism and had the worst identity crisis as well when I had my first. I was 21 and had no idea what I was doing. Despite it being a planned pregnancy within marriage that I was very excited about. You are not alone in that. And don't worry, it gets better, it really does. Those first 4 months with a newborn are like an out of body experience with the lack of sleep. It'll get easier.

as a man it instruct me on why I need to make more money to offer the possibility to my future wife ( I dont even have a girlfriend lol ) to not work AT LEAST during the first 1 or 2 years of mothering.

I’ll go ahead and be vulnerable. I have a 3yr old and a 2yr old thirteen months apart and I still 100% do not enjoy motherhood. My husband and I became homeless when I lost my job after our first born. I was also pregnant with our second baby. we eventually found an apartment after the birth of our second born. My marriage has fallen apart to the point where we are divorcing. I am stuck in our small apartment 24/7 with two toddlers and one of them being special needs. I have no support because my husband moved us away from ALL of our support and the people at my church doesn’t help. I did not want to move out here but he thought it was best. It was best for him but not our family. We barely get by financially so I’m trying to find work but then I’ll just be working for daycare. Only one car so the most I can do is go for a walk and closes park is 8 miles away. I have had so many breakdowns and the home has become so unhealthy I have to send my kids off to our babysitter whom loves on our boys so much. They do deserve a better mother. I just don’t think I was meant to be a mom. At least not in this moment. I was not ready not even a tiny bit for motherhood and I struggle every single day. I push through just so they can survive but that’s about it. It really does take s village. Worse part is if I open up to any other mother (Christian or not) about how I feel. I just get bashed to the point where I went to take my own life. There is one thing I think people do need and that is money. Not a lot, but enough to where you can have access to resources outside the home. So you can buy a cheap dress you always wanted, go get a pedicure, get your hair done, whatever it may be that isn’t super costly. You need money!

I was born to a mother that resented me the moment she knew she was pregnant. She even went into pre-term labor because she refused to take off of work despite doctor's orders. I was immediately placed in the care of two extended female relatives while my mother went up the ladder. Thankfully, these two female relatives were grounded in God and never once let me feel unwanted. However, I struggle to find female friends that view femininity and motherhood positively. Both of my female relatives have passed on. I desperately seek motherhood, but the fear of doing it alone without other women paralyzes me. I pray daily for strength and bravery, but it's hard.

As someone who had an almost identical experience, let me say this for any who is either planning on having kids or just had a kid and is in the throes of feeling like they regret motherhood… Let me tell you that it does get better. I feel like our modern society has made it so that motherhood is so honest to God horrible sometimes. My postpartum experience left me feeling as if I had made a horrible mistake. I was in so much pain and because of that when I found out that I was pregnant again only 10 months later, I was extremely concerned. My second child is almost 2 months, and I have to say this time around it is so much better! I opted for an unmedicated birth of the birth center, and even though I did tear, I felt as if I was back to normal within a week of giving birth. Pitocin is no joke. Being able to experience an unmedicated birth the second time around has made me want to have more kids.

I don't think it is normal for a woman to be home alone in a house in the suburbs with a baby, it's incredibly isolating. This is many times the case in America these days and many western countries. I can see why women feel so much fear when becoming new mothers and don't want to give up their old pathways for sociality and life. This is a problem largely because we do not have intergenerational households anymore and our living quarters and organised too much around the nuclear family structure and not around the extended family/ a real community not based around the 9-5. I plan to have kids but I honestly do think about using some daycare if I don't have enough support.

I've been married 31 years. I've been a mother for 29 years and I've been a Christian for 33 years. I felt some of the ways that you're describing about a loss of identity and not really knowing who I am, so your story is very relatable. But the other thing that I was struggling with at the same time that I didn't really have a grip on was perfectionism and I had a tendency to look at my flaws and my faults and not put them in a realistic perspective. I also had a tendency to overemphasize the things and the sins that I needed to work on instead of looking at the grace and the healing that God had given me in areas of my life that we're going to be beneficial for my son and later on children . Every woman when she becomes a mother has flaws. She carries those flaws with her into motherhood. What children do though is they help us change. God uses them to slough off those character issues. I've homeschooled all of my kids. I've got six and God used that to teach me patience. when people are like. Oh my gosh, you must be so patient. You homeschool. no I homeschool and through that God uses that as the crucible to teach me patience. Your daughter and any other children you have are going to help you grow, change and become more of the woman of God that He intends for you to be so in essence, baby girl, just chill a little bit and enjoy your daughter.

Absolutely agree with this!! Unless it's completely necessary, I don't agree with daycare. I'm so glad I have the blessing of being able to be a stay at home mom in the future 👏

I’m currently 3 years below you & admire you incredibly as if I think about having a baby in 3 years it scares the heck out of me. I love and admire your lifestyle so much. Godbless you and your family. 💗

Your honest thoughts are appreciated. I’m 28, been married for almost 3 years. We are planning to try and get pregnant next year. I’ve been wanting to start a family and have a baby but we have been waiting and spending the last 2 years getting our finances together, saving money and my husband is working on a masters degree so he can support us so that I can stay home. It’s been hard to wait when I keep thinking about how i want to have a baby, but like you said in the video, day care is a serious decisions so if I’m going to stay home we have to be financially prepared. Anyway, thank you again for sharing your experience.

Becoming pregnant is exactly what I needed! God knew I needed this baby for so many reasons. I'm due any day now and I'm so happy to come across this video. Thank you so much, so beautifully articulated.

I needed to hear this. Thank you for the God honoring advice. I’m planning on getting married soon and I’ve found myself afraid of the possibility of becoming a mom. This was uplifting and deeply encouraging for me.

This is all so accurate to my own situation, I could cry! I just had my first child at 30 and I have felt all the negativity you describe and come to the same conclusions in the end. I always thought I was mature, until I had to give up everything for another person’s wants on their terms and time. Then I learned how selfish I really was. And the feeling that I am lazy and not contributing financially because I’m a stay at home mom hits me everyday, I feel like it is for sure how I am being judged by the other women in my sphere who tell me my job isn’t hard because I don’t work and do daycare. Thank you for articulating everything so wonderfully.

Love this video! As a mom of a 2 year old and also 33 weeks pregnant, I can say that as soon as I knew I was pregnant with my first it just felt unnatural to me to have her in daycare. I chose to put my work on the shelf and I’m a stay at home mom now, I only work literally for 4-6 hours one day a week, when my husband is able to stay at home with her. I started doing this a few months after she turned 1 years old as I was exclusively breastfeeding her and she wasn’t eating solid foods that much (we started introducing it when it’s recommended). Anyway I plan to stay at home with my children the first years of their lives. I think one thing is so important to remember for us who are at home with our children, and that is if you choose to stay at home with them, it is crucial not to put them in front of a video game or a screen. My mother did that to my youngest brother and now is constantly judging me for not putting my child in daycare as she has seen the “damage” that has been done to my brother, but doesn’t understand that it’s not because he didn’t go to daycare, it’s because she literally just left him all day in front of the tv screen.. I also think for the ones of us who haven’t been blessed with a mother of our own who enjoyed being a mother, and instead had a negative approach to it, only saw it as a burden, we have to do even more of a work on ourselves to be able to learn what it means to be a mom. As soon as I had given birth to my child, my grandmother and mother immediately had to tell me “you see how hard it is being a mother? How exhausting it is?” Yes of course it is hard and exhausting at times, but there are so many wonderful aspects to it which makes it all worth it, yet they never mentioned those to me. They come from a culture or family where one self sacrifices for children, BUT it is done with resentment. Anyway long comment. Just wanted to say I totally agree with you and loved the video🙏🏻🫶🏼

The lies you were told: - birth needs to happen with a certain time or else - a membrane sweep can start birth - waters breaking means birth HAS TO START and contractions HAVE to be begin right away. - Pit is needed to start contractions (it would’ve started naturally without any infection, yes) Do you not see that your birth was a money grab? It pains my heart and im so sorry all of this happened to you. Did you know that within psychological birth, as the baby is slowly and peacefully descending, it activates chemicals in the brain to further facilitate bonding and an easier transition into motherhood. Every woman deserves this. You are a strong, healthy and fruitful woman and they treated you like you were dying and needed saving 💔

I’m not a mother but I just love love love your honesty in this video. My younger sister is trying to have a baby and this is what I’m trying to express to her because she’s still a little immature and still is a little selfish.(nothing wrong with that.) but being a mother requires a lot of self sacrifice and self denial. Which is why I don’t wanna be a mother right now, no matter how much I love children. I think all children deserve mothers who want to be with them all the time and want to be self-sacrificing. It’s great to see people having honest conversations about motherhood.

Just started my 3rd trimester! I'm extremely excited. Thank you so much for this video. Being a mother should be empowering for women💗

I love this. Im married and 26... Part of my reason for not having children (at least yet) is because I realized I'm not mature enough yet. Thinking about motherhood currently makes me mourn my current life which let's me know I'm not ready. I'm not actively planning but moreso in a state of, "I'm doing what it takes to prevent it. If it happens, then it's because God felt it was time". If I am destined to be a mother, it will happen.

A big problem I want to point out with this video is that not all stay at home moms are good moms. My mom stayed at home with 7 kids and homeschooled all of us and even though she took care of our basic needs, she was verbally & emotionally abusive and none of us had a good relationship with her. My Mom in law also stays at home with my 6 & 11 year old sister in laws and she won't even cook them meals or play with them. Her house is a mess and the kids watch youtube all day. My 11 year old sister in law has already tried to self harm and wanted to move in with my husband & I since she was 7 years old. I don't mean any of this against you as a person, you seem very kind. I just think it's important to add that some stay at home moms are hurting their children more than helping them 💔

Me as a Kindergarten teacher can only agree! Came to the same conclusions like most other Kindergarten teachers I know. If you ask a Kindergarten teacher, they would never put their child into daycare before 3 years old and most of them are so relieved that their own children are in the same daycare that they work in.

You are right about the world really sending the message we need to have and do it all as mothers and that is really destroying many women mentally and physically cause everyone keeps saying yes but you are also a person beside being a mother and you need to have something for yourself outside motherhood like work... I personally just wanna embrace being a mother and try to be the best I can be to my son Great video❤

I always enjoy listening to you Jasmyne 💗You're able to articulate the thoughts I have in my mind that I can't quite put into words myself. Wish I had friends like you nearby 🤗

Hey jasmyne I really want to say I am so happy I found you because you have taught me so much about godly femininity that my mother couldn't. In this video the part where you said if mothers don't enjoy being mothers the children will think it's there fault, it spoke to me because my mother would always regret giving birth or being a mom b/c she suffered so much because of it. All my life I have believed and I still do that I am the reason for her suffering.But I am so thankful to her. So I am scared to be a mother but seeing this video has helped a lot so God bless you and thank you so much.

Mom of 7 here! Amen Jasmine! I grew up so differently than how my children are; and that is by the grace of God. He provided mentors (from church and through books) that helped me to understand the things you are staying in this one video. We are a blessed generation.

The obstetrical system does not benefit from informing mothers about breastfeeding. That means they would have to treat you like a human while in birth which means no induction, no drugs, no unnecessary interventions and no coercion. That’s way less money in their pockets and it pays big bucks to interrupt and micromanage the birth. The best breast feeding journey is after physiological birth and that’s virtually nonexistent within obstetrics. Once a mother is treated like a foolish woman who is sick and needs to be saved and like birth is a high risk emergency instead of the everyday occurrence that it is, breast feeding becomes tarnished. How could it not?

Your humility and honesty is incredible and inspiring. God Bless you, Jasmyne.

This was AMAZING. Such a wonderful and refreshing painting of motherhood and what it should look like!

This is such a good and truthful video, and I pray that it will help many women. I have three beautiful children (two daughters aged 7 and 5, and a 14 month old son). While I loved the first few years of motherhood, I was often very anxious and saw myself as a victim during the hard moments. Over the years, I have continually asked the Lord to grow me in all of the areas that are a struggle for me, and He has truly helped me so much and shown such a loving grace. There were weaknesses and faults in my character that I had no idea were there before I became a mother! Motherhood can be a sanctifying and beautiful journey, it is just so important to humble ourselves and allow the Lord to transform us in His ways. Of course we will still make mistakes, but it's just about truly devoting ourselves to our role and trying our best each day.

What a necessary and gracious message! I wish you the world of success with your channel. We need more publicity on your niche. 💕

What a lovely woman you're Jasmyne.. I feel so empowered by your amazing content. Thank you so much. Eagerly waiting for more & more videos on femininity 💗

Thank you for sharing! It was very insightful. I admire your critical thinking abilities and would love to know more about how you cultivated them. Great content!

I appreciate your honesty. I felt very similar and I experienced a lot of shame because of these feelings. I held this is in all my life even though I believe I can’t be the only mother who feels this way. This should be discussed as a part of motherhood.

Every video of Jasmyne is so uplifting and based on truth. In all honesty all these lost femme roles in life based off of God's own purpose for our lives should be incorporated more into our lives as women. And might I add how the message from this video and the little goofy end just makes me want to be a mother when I'm so far from that stage yet??? It's a beautiful thing to be a woman and God bless you Jasmyne for being so bold in bringing true femininity back. I appreciate you.

This is so true, especially about the immaturity and selfishness. I don't have my own child, but I'm 23 and my parents have a baby. As the older sibling I had to take on most of the babysitting when she was born, and I had know idea what taking care of a baby was like. Of course my parents were present, but we were also a big family. Boy was I HUMBLED. It showed me how selfish and immature I was, all I wanted to do was play my video games and do what I usually do--- and believed that she wa Zs sucking my life away. She's 2 now, and I learned so much in the eyes of a mother. Kids deserve all your attention, all your time, and all your love!

Thank you for sharing these truths. Your humility and honesty is much appreciated. God bless🕊

Facts sister. As a future mother, this is exactly the stuff I’ve been learning about to prepare.

Perfectly said. Thank you for sharing some of your more vulnerable thoughts from early motherhood. One of the hardest things about those types of thoughts and feelings is that you feel even more incompetent for having them, because you feel alone in them. Knowing that I'm not the only mom who has thought "why did I do this to myself" makes me feel like less of a failure Eta (because I can't wait to finish a video before commenting 🤦🏼‍♀️): this also humbled me because with my newborn I find myself getting so overwhelmed by the constant need for someone to be touching me. I think, "why can't I just be alone for 5 minutes!" Because I made this commitment to have this child and I owe him the closeness he needs.

Hello beautiful, I want to comment to say thank you for this video. Everything you said was so spot on! I pray your days are made easier and fulfilling as you navigate motherhood ❤ I was (am still, kinda) a nurse and now with my 1yo and another one brewing, I'm trying to find a way to make income at home because I definitely cannot picture myself going out of home for work anymore 😅 but purely as an extra. Bless my husband for his hard work in providing for all of us 😊 keep up with the great content ❤

Your Honesty Is So Pure And Real, God Continue To Bless You And Yours 🙏🙏🙏

Some mothers WANT to be home with their babies. Not all mothers feel daycare is this luxury they can use to get rid of their kids for most of the day. Sometimes daycare is their only choice right now due to financial reasons-you need money to take care of children and therefore some mother HAVE to work. Let’s think about all of the single mothers, the mothers who don’t have the best to financial situations who are still mothers and they do everything they can to be there and present for their child because they exist.

Your videos always are so worth listen to! Thanks for sharing your experience! Its sad children are seen as burden! I cant blame parents, we live in a fallen world and full of faults, sins we are, but the impact is profound in a child how is treated, raised!

It’s so TRUE. Motherhood is so incredible because you either pony up and be the person they need you to be or you face recreating those issues in your child. I felt the exact same way when I had my first. It took me four years to even want another one because it was four years of being ripped apart, and having to rebuild my whole understanding of myself. Only made it through by the grace of God and my husband who never lost faith in me.

thank you for being vulnerable with us 💚💚💚

Agree so much on the daycare topic! Amazing video as always ❤️

This message is incredible! You've help me understand how this affects generations down the road. Although, change is possible ❤

This is so true. Motherhood really puts a spotlight on all our flaws. But it’s ok, you work through it eventually although motherhood keeps challenging you forever, every phase of child’s life is a new challenge. But it made me realize how shallow my life and my identity was before becoming a mom so i don’t regret it in the slightest. That said, the first couple years were a nightmare and my heart goes out to all women who didn’t expect how hard being a mother is. Just know that it does get better and it’s a 1000% worth it.

Where were you 30 years ago when I had my first born son.... I really enjoy watching your videos. My vocabulary has increased because of you 😊😊😊 and I'm grateful to God that there are people such as yourself that will speak the truth. Speak it in love. I'm the mother of two grown children and I had the privilege to stay at home while they were young until school age. I did put them in daycare around 4 years old just so they can get used to being around children when they went to school. Thank you so much for sharing and being so vulnerable with us. I really appreciate it. Smooches 💋

I love that you are a young mother teaching other young women and young mothers, it would be so great to get an older mother or grandmother with multiple children or years of experience to do a sit down with you to fill in the gap. This will bring an insight into some areas you haven't encountered yet. Your beautiful and doing a great job. Signed mom of 5 (biological and adoption) children.

Beautifully said. This is a well needed conversation. I have 6 beautiful children and because of my selfishness I resented being a mother but also yearned it ( only our Lord can show us how to love) I understand the blessing now and my mind has been renewed to His truth on motherhood and the absolute blessing it is and how His plan for family is so wonderful. My children are grown (I still have my 16 year old twin boys at home) it’s been a journey for sure but in it all God has rebuilt my family and even blessed me with a grand daughter. God bless you and your precious family may His love, truth and ways help it to grow into the blessing your hearts desire 🌷

I’m so glad you made this video. I’m 3yrs into this…& I still struggle with the thought my best isn’t always enough. I just take it a day at a time.

Great video 🥹. Many moms struggle to hear it, but it’s true for so many of them. My mom ran a home daycare and I remember hearing her trying to help moms feel better about their children calling my mom “mom”. Their hearts would break. Sometimes their babies wouldn’t even want to leave my mom. This scarred me. Moms in the moment work through the guilt and they don’t talk about it. They don’t tell other young women how hard it actually is and those young women grow up to do the same not realizing how hard it truly was. Just because we sometimes believe that something is necessary doesn’t mean we can talk about how wrong it feels.

Wonderful video. Thank you for your vulnerability and wisdom.

Loved this video!💜 People who resent becoming parents have no one to blame but themselves and need to stop projecting that regret onto others. In regards to daycare, the fact that it is so expensive and there are way too many kids in one vicinity is enough for me not to pursue in the future. I rather develop a lifelong relationship with someone who’s going to help me with my babies and only my babies. I believe in mothers having help. I plan on hiring a night nurse/ nanny once I have kids (even as a stay at home mother). I’m so excited for motherhood🥰

This was the most perfect video for me to watch right now. I’m currently preparing for pregnancy and motherhood and this video helped me see where I still need to grow before having a child. ❤ thank you!

My baby turns 2 this month and you put how I have felt since he was born into words so well. Thank you. It feels cathartic to know I’m not the only one feeling this.

Had no idea epidural affects latch! Thank you for your transparency. As a single with no kids (yet, Lord willing), you've given me some great advice to consider when the time arrives!

This was really refreshing. To be honest I put off watching this video because I was concerned I would be hearing yet another testimony of how difficult motherhood is and how society is to blame and mothers are all martyrs …. This was a much more honest, refreshing and wise take. This is so true - motherhood is hard because it requires selflessness, and we are selfish. And selfishness is not morally neutral - it is evil, and fosters misery. Praise the Lord for a better way.

The thumbnail makes my heart melt ❤❤ You look so beautiful and feminine

Thank you for this honest video - we had our daughters around the same time and it’s refreshing to hear some of these points so bluntly. Days can be hard but I never for one moment regret sacrificing so much of myself for my little one. I work from home and keep her home with me because why wouldn’t I? Everyone is so shocked when they find out she’s not in daycare as if that’s the standard. But I would like to mention that I also started my birth at a birth center - there are many reasons why one would need to go to the hospital and eventually (potentially) end up with an epidural. Pitocin isn’t the only thing that can cause unnaturally difficult and painful contractions. My baby was sunny side up and after 20 hours of labor, I started experiencing back labor which is absolutely horrendous. It feels like your lower back is just going to snap. My contractions were fast and furious from the moment they started. After more than 24 hours of labor and not dilating past 5cm, I had to go to the hospital. My experience with an epidural was wonderful (for many reasons) and it was when I let go and surrendered to our Lord, that things went better. I still labored another 12 hours at the hospital but it was peaceful. The only thing that actually got me past 5cm was the midwife breaking my water (at the hospital). Not even 2 hours later and my daughter was out in 2 pushes. She’ll be a year old next month and I exclusively nurse on demand. She had ties that we had to work with (not related to the epidural). Everyone’s journey is different but I wanted to add this comment for anyone who is afraid of an epidural or breastfeeding, etc. It might have not been the case for your breastfeeding journey - again, so many factors to consider. I just know that watching so many videos caused so much anxiety and nerves around giving birth at a hospital. It ended up being a really positive experience for me. again, FOR ME. And I know that you are sharing your experience - just wanted to put my story out there because it’s what might have helped me when I was pregnant. ❤❤ love your videos! And happy birthday to your little baby 🎉❤

Thank you for sharing your experience!

Your honesty and beautiful articulation were so needed today! Thank you 💛 Also please don't blame yourself for your rough breastfeeding journey. Some babies just don't get it. I had C-sections with all 3 children and the first 2 fed like a dream until 1 year old but this 3rd has been problematic from the start. Did lots of lactation consultants etc like you did and nobody has an explanation 🤷‍♀️ Babies are all different. It might be totally different with your next, regardless of what happens in birth. You've done an incredible thing bringing life into the world! Don't feel any guilt at all there x x x

Hey, Jasmyne! I love watching your videos as a Christian in my late twenties. You have such a wonderful way of presenting things and expressing your views in delicate, yet honest ways. I have struggled with infertility for coming up on 4 years now and wondered if you could do a video on infertility? It definitely has been a very difficult journey. The emotions I felt and still sometimes feel make me feel guilty. I recently realized that I felt like my inability to have children made me feel less feminine, which I know logically is silly, but I still struggle with that thought some days. I also struggled for around 3 years with the fact that I might not ever have kids and wondered what was wrong with my character that the Lord didn't want me to have any. I have processed and worked through many of those very self-loathing thoughts and feelings, but I still find that some days I revert back to those early days of infertility, though rare. My least favorite day of the year is Mother's Day, which makes me feel guilty for my own mother and the beautiful mothers in my life. While at Church on Mother's Day, the Lord always preaches the Preacher saying that it isn't just for mothers, but for all Godly women, which everyone agrees with, but when we go to our respective relative's they only focus on the mothers in my husband and my families. This is extremely hurtful and next year I think my husband and I are going to go on a weekend trip somewhere fun that weekend. I am not sure if you have personal experience with infertility or have had family or friends that have suffered from it, but many people do not understand what it is like and find it very hard to empathize with people who suffer from it. I lost a friendship in the early days of my journey because I didn't know how to process what I was going through and the other person could not empathize with me to imagine what it would be like. Sorry for my rambling. If it is a sensitive subject to you or someone close to you and you don't want to cover the topic, I completely understand! I just feel like it is a subject that is considered taboo or shameful to talk about, when in reality it should be talked about more. Love your videos and your kindness! ❤

Appreciate the honest and realness

I'm only just a few minutes in and I can already relate. I sometimes find myself in seasons where I feel as though my children deserve more. Mainly because I feel like I'm still figuring out the basics. I aspire to be a wife and mother I NEVER witnessed, I'm working to cultivate behaviors and instill routines for my children that I was never taught. I sometimes think of how much smoother things would be, how much more rich this time would be if I was a fourth or fifth generation traditional family that had a mother and a grandmother to turn to for advice. Looking forward to hearing the rest of your video! Thank you Jasmyne for your thoughts! Happy almost birthing day❤❤

i had my first born as a very immature 20 year old. i missed my old life so much especially since nobody else i knew were in the same place as me in life. i was exhausted from lack of sleep, depressed from having a hard time breastfeeding, and did not easily connect to my son when he was a baby. i remember live in those really early days are brutally boring and tiring. it was HARD. i had so much growing up to do. now i'm 25, and my son is 4 and i have a 2.5 year old girl too. LIFE IS SO MUCH EASIER. yes, i went through some really difficult phases, as my own mom was very verbally abusive, and would find myself so easily triggered and screaming at them. having kids DOES put your issues on full and obvious display. i felt similar to you, wishing they had a better mom. i have worked so hard to become that mom. i love my sweet kids and i'm trying for another baby now. i am now in a phase where i am not fully and completely centered on myself, and it is such a relief. i am doing my best to just CHILL OUT and take my time with my kids. it's going to be okay moms!!! i stay at home with my kids too. it's my favorite thing ever w

Thanks, I'll stay childfree :)

Funny as a man working like a maniac on a startup I relate a lot to what you say.

Pregnant with my first child at 22 and going into motherhood feels so scary. Thank you for the insightful video

I am going to get over this maiden mindset thank you for this it’s time to throw myself into motherhood especially now that I’m out of the first trimester..... it’s time to change...

Im glad you made something like this. I love the idea of raising children, but my selfishness scares me. Reading the bible makes me feel a strong desire to be a mother but not long after i wonder how much pain i would have to go thru because of my selfishness. I have so many fears but u also long to understand what being a mother is like. Ive felt more at home taking care of children than i ever have at work but i keep telling myself "at least one ends after x amount of hours". I would love to see you make a video specifically on how you overcame those emotions after you gave birth ❤️

I an vain and have terrible time management. It makes me scares to be a mother, wife even. Everytime i think about it, i get scared. I'm happy you made this video

Great advice! Very well spoken, I have a two year old. I am a work from home single mom. And I have always sacrificed career and money for my child. I want the best for him and he needs his mom more than ever. GREAT advice as someone who also went from the switch of being a single women to now a mother it’s a whole mental shift no one prepares you for. Until now!

Yes , someone said it. ❤ truth always prevails. ♥️🙏🏼🙏🏼🥰 I can’t wait to be a wife and mother

This is so good!!!!! Thank you

5 min in this video and I already want to say… oh my, thank you, ❤thank you thank you thank you so much

I was forced to go back to work out of necessity very shortly after my baby was born and I regret it every single day of my life. It absolutely breaks my heart every time I have to leave her, and although I’m very fortunate that my husband is an amazing father and takes such good care of her so she has never had to go to daycare, I am not and never will be a career woman, and at heart all I care about is being a wife and mother. I’m grateful my daughter and I still have a very close bond and I cherish the time we are able to be together, but I work extremely hard to afford the basics and my dream is that one day I can find a way to stay home to be there for my family.

Ditto. I hear ya. So right. I lost myself to ground zero after my first child....but guess what...I have 5 kids under 8 now, and they are one of my greatest joys and unmeasurable love. I wish I could have shared any advice for you to have spared you that fall. *Empathetic bear hug!!*

Totally agree. Very inspiring! 🥰

Thank you for teaching lost female Education dear

Yeah. Postpartum is a real thing love. It’s not just being miserable. The hormonal change is what causes it believe it or not

I had a very hard time accepting motherhood. Some of if came from the sheer exhaustion that a baby brings in the first few months, but so much of it was me! I had to let go of my desire to continue living for me, continue living my old life. It was very difficult to let the old me go and begin forging my new life with my daughter... but now she's five and motherhood is not only normal but the best thing I could have imagined. Surrendering to motherhood was hard but it was such a blessing 🧡

Thankyou for speaking to this.

Thank you for this video! It was very insightful. Could you talk more about balancing being a mom and also making time for yourself? While I understand that being a mom is sacrificial I do believe that we are also individuals and that if we don’t take care of ourselves or do things for ourselves that we won’t show up in the way we need to with our children. For example I am an introvert and while I definitely can enjoy being around friends etc I need time to recharge. Would love to hear your perspective here and ways you take care of yourself and also make time for you

thank you for the honesty

Great video! I'm pregnant and so excited to be home with my precious baby girl! ❤🥰

I could not have articulated it better myself ❤

Our society rush young women to have children but this is why having children older I think helps a lot of this. I got out all of my selfishness or living my life out of way. I’m going to be an older mom but this was the perfect timing for me. I agree with many of these points. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

Thanks so much for this

I know you like psychology. I wish you'd talked more about attachment theory and the strange event experiment. I think this plays into understanding what "joy" in parenting really is. Not so much being happy all the time, but always putting a child first and ensuring them of your presence, attention, and provision of safety. I know many mothers who suffer postnatal depression but are still able to provide an environment of secure attachment for their children.

Lord, as your body was broken for your children, let also my body be broken for mine. ❤ After a forced C-section I struggled with painful breastfeeding for 3 months. But I emerged victorious afterwards, as we all eventually do, if we just aim for it. Hang in the mamas!

My friend has worked in daycare for years. She thinks it’s the worst thing you can do for your child. Most states have a 4 to one ratio of babies to daycare worker. There will always be at least one kid not getting what he needs.

I’m 29 years old and married woman and I appreciate the truth. I have no children yet.

What a video! 💖💖 APSOLUTELY agree with you.