What to Do When Your Ex Moves on RIDICULOUSLY FAST | Matthew Hussey 

My doctor recently told me this: *”Because you didn't want to lose them, you lost yourself in the process. Find yourself again and you will find happiness. Remember that if a relationship doesn't help you become a better person… ending it does”* From that day on, I realized the past can not be changed, forgotten, edited, or erased. It can only be accepted.

If they moved on that fast, They probably had someone already on the Wait-List. They checked out along time ago mentally.

Moving on quickly usually indicates a lack of healing & codependence. It usually has nothing to do with the other person.

Breakups are so hard to a point where you start wondering I really have a relationship or was it just in my mind. People just move on incredibly soon and it makes you wonder if you even meant anything to them at all. It sucks.

Some people like to fast track their relationships and drop someone and then replace the person with someone new without healing. No matter if they married their quick rebound, or had kids with them. It will fail. It’s just a matter of time. All the things they were when they were with you, this new person has to put up with, and rebound relationships, marriages and serious relationships rarely last. Even years after, men and women don’t get over someone good that they loved. The show you see on social media means nothing.

For those who still suffer, it takes time but wanted to share... - Keep busy and productive - Spend time with family and friends (it's a different kind of company and won't fill the "void" but it definitely helps). - Don't hold back your emotions. Let them come out. You'll get over it quicker if you don't hide them. Your body and mind are processing the change. Let it. It'll feel crap but it'll be good for you in the long run. - If you lived with the person especially, get rid of anything that reminds you of them. Just do it, trust me. It helps to purify. - Keep on music and background noise if you feel lonely. - Don't look them up. Don't contact them. It only makes the emptiness worse. It's so hard not to do, but just move on! Your self-worth isn't measured by whatever they're doing. Who f cares! Think about it, they're gone. They're gone for a valid reason. Move on. Good luck guys!

You set boundaries and he moved on to someone who doesn’t have boundaries. You’re better off!!

To be honest, it’s so tempting to just give up on love altogether. I was talking with one of my friends about this: the minute you let someone in, they f-up your peace. At the same time I’ve been learning and through lots of therapy and self-reflection I’ve realized why I’ve been choosing the wrong ones, or guys who aren’t meant for me. While I want to give up, I am still hopeful. I’ve deleted my dating apps and feel so freaking good. I’ve realized that they aren’t for me and I’m gonna live my life, create my own happiness, and make connections. And, prayerfully one day I’ll meet a great guy just from living an amazing life. My point is, I’m hopeful.

It's better to move on slowly but surely. No one escapes heartbreak because there is always attachment (in a healthy relationship). If they don't feel it now, they'll feel it down the line. In the mean time focus on yourself

Heartbreak is one of the most painful experiences I've ever had in my life. Oh boy.

The new situation isn’t love, it’s just infatuation aka the “honeymoon phase”. I’ve come to learn some people are just in love with the idea of love, no real substance. It won’t last. My advice, just take care of yourself (emotionally, physically, and psychologically) until you don’t want them anymore. Cause you definitely won’t! You’ll realize that a person who has to crush you in order to lift the next person up is a weirdo3000 and also, if the next girl is soaking up her special treatment over you, here’s a gem for you…. He ain’t changed…& She’s next 🤷🏽‍♀️

Every time someone breaks up with you or rejects you, it is actually a blessing for you! Because at least they didn't keep on dating you and lead you on for longer

I had this happen to me. I was with my ex-boyfriend for 6 years. We lived together for 5 years, I moved across the country for him, away from my friends and family, and he'd asked my parents for their permission to ask me to marry him. And then one day he broke up with me and kicked me out of our apartment. Blamed me for everything and made me feel like I deserved it. Two days later he posted pictures of him and one of his female friends together, the one that he swore he didn't have feelings for (not that I'd ever accused him - I'd always trusted him 100%). Looking back, I realize I dodged a major bullet. I could not be happier with the direction my life is headed now, and Matthew's videos have been a huge part of that healing process. To all my broken hearted ladies (and gents), take this time to focus on YOU. Be gentle and kind to yourself. Love yourself. You are enough. You are going to be okay.

Delete every single photo, delete every email and delete every text message. Throw away anything in your home that reminds you of them. You have to be a little bit cold to get through this pain. They threw you away like a piece of garbage; now it’s time to throw them away.

It feels like the person you love and care for doesn't exist. Take care everyone.

My wife left me for another man. And since, she went and got a boob job, went to Disney World with him which was supposed to be our honeymoon we never got, and seeing that broke me. Its been over a year since our divorce and seeing those pictures made me feel like I fell back to square one. I feel numb, angry, sad, and just hurt. I feel worthless, tossed aside and replaced as though i meant nothing

Usually it only seems too fast for ones who were dumped. Then you learn that they were already building something new for a while (in their heads, it's not always about cheating) while planning to leave you. That's the reason they're moving so fast, because it was already happening for them before we know it.

My ex started dating like a week or less after he broke up with me. We were together for 4 years. Talked about moving in together, getting married. One day he told me he doesnt feel like hes in love with me anymore and he has a crush on another girl. Those feelings of being replaceable, of having trusted someone and having that trust shattered, of being wrong about someone are so difficult to manage. I've never felt so horrible before.

Fact is...if she moves on very quickly after u break up with her....she had him on deck in case of the breakup. Sadly. And probably in that case you made the right move by breaking up with her. She never cared about you very much anyway.

I must say it gets quite exhausting, when you are the one investing... because they initially show interest, you're the one who is proudly telling your friends and family how great the potential partner is... you're the one trying to do the right thing... be honest, be understanding, be good to them, respect them, treat them well... and they initially reciprocate... only to turn their backs and dump you for someone else (usually with a fair bit of overlap) When it keeps happening, I must say, regardless of ones self confidence... it takes it's toll. I didn't sign up for that kind of treatment, and I refuse to accept that it is normal, acceptable behaviour. I am exhausted from having to walk away from people that I once believed in.

Someone choosing you is the bare minimum in a relationship by definition. If they don’t, it’s the ultimate dealbreaker.

“Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better. Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenge, wish for more wisdom.” - Jim Rohn ✨

From the first time we met, our first date, all the times spent, waking up & going to sleep by their side every day. Then to have that person you love plan their way out. Thinking of all the things that could have been. Thinking of what I could have done differently. For the past month & a half it has been some of my darkest days. When she left me I told her that I love you & you're my best friend. I've remained in no contact. It's been so difficult at times. It's been so hard to move on & my whole world feels upside down at times

You got to push yourself to MOVE ON! You must erase all the memories. Cut off social media. He or She is not right person for you in this life time. Take yourself to vacation, meet new people, join gym and etc✈️🍹

That is the love bombing period... only time will tell his true feelings after their fights and arguments and problems comes

Thankfully I haven’t had this happen to me. I’ve blocked my ex on social media and we had no shared friends, so I’ll never know what he’s up to - which was the point. 👍 But still watching to support Matthew! We’re all going to heal! 🤗🙏

I read this beautiful paragraph from a beautiful book during my high school days and every phase of fail wherever I failed in life I remembered it and committed to my memory. It is: "The problem lies in the fact that man too often bases his choice on immediate satisfaction rather than on ultimate value. Many take the short view and their vision is limited to this earth. They specialize on the things that are seen rather than on the promises of God.. They grasp the present and stop to consider the glories of future. The spirit of materialism blinds their eyes to real issues of life." I have experienced this and lived it.

Haven’t dated in a couple of years. Working on self and meeting only friends for socializing. I pray for my person, who is out in the world, to come to me soon. 💜

I feel this so much. It’s so painful to still feel so heartbroken but see your ex is moving on so fast.

I've definitely been here. Sometimes we make the mistake of seeing situations for what we want them to be, and not what they actually are. These are very difficult because you want to be upset with the other person, but the signs were probably there. People that respect and value the relationship you have won't do these things.

To me, sounds like "future faking" and when held accountable to dreams sold jumped ship to an immediate new source of attention and admiration... wouldn't rule out codependent tendencies either. Dodged a bullet! Don't forget who he showed you to be when he comes back full of apologies and "remorse" down the road.

Being in a relationship for 3 years and he was just doing the same things over and over. It was clear to me that we was never willing to change his ways for us. Eventually I broke up with him just to text me he misses me. But by now I know I knew he will never change and standing by my desicion. Just a month after that he was in a new relationship and I thank God that i made the right choice cause this said a lot. I know that there is someone amazing out there. Thank you for reassuring every single woman that struggles to get out of bed every morning that we are meant for greatness and deserves a second chance at love. 😊

Can we just talk about the immaturity of posting a screenshot of their conversation and 'IYKYK', knowing the former gf would see it 🙄 Thanks Matt for addressing the topic of someone moving on super quickly. I've had it happen to me and also, unintentionally and very unfortunately, made someone else feel this way. It's awful and we all need to remember we still have the same worth, and that whoever it was, they weren't our person.

My ex of five years had a girlfriend two weeks later. She left her overnight-bag in our appartment. oh and we were engaged. the wedding was planned three month before the break up. I can laugh now. Its three years later and I have the best boyfriend now. life is just crazy sometimes

I literally just gave 6 years to someone and they broke up with me over text and probably moving on. In these situations, they either left you months ago and didn't express their needs so built up enough resentment to leave. Find someone who communicated and avoid avoidants if they aren't willing to be open with you

My boyfriend broke up with me over text after 8 months, at 2am, with no way to correct things. By the looks of it, it was something he was thinking on for weeks and never said anything to me, even after I asked many times if he was feeling ok/happy (and him saying yes, every time). Then this happened, people are crazy, if you EVER get in a relationship MAKE SURE they're HAPPY ENOUGH BY THEMSELVES so they don't bring the giant bag of drama/issues/etc. of their previous relationships / situations. No matter what you do, you will never please them. I tried, many times.

This is so good. I ended a relationship last night, not because I wanted to, but because I had to. No effort put in and actually had been seeing someone else..I ignored the red flags...onwards and upwards 🤣👍

Thank you for this...needed this....funny because I'm going through this right now....been dating someone for almost a year this month was going to be our first anniversary...started acting strange 2 months back and said he needed space....early this week I got a voice note telling me he is back with his ex they decided to fix things..didn't even know the ex was still in the picture....they've now moved in together....it's a lot to take in right now 😢 💔....thank you for this...

💖Moving on Fast Does NOT Mean Better. So When they BOUNCE Back tell EM NO TRAITOR FACE you Gotta GO.😁

Idk what it is about the 6 month mark but this legit happened to me too. Went from calling me every day to one morning breaking up over text. The whole “it’s me not you” bullshit story instead of being direct. You’re right, if after half a year of being with you they can just abruptly end things, especially over text like a coward, it’s a blessing they didn’t waste 6 years and cause even more damage. Definitely dodged a bullet.

It was an ego death for me. And i didn’t believe i had egotistical issues. I was really humble back then. Now i have less remorse after he screwed with me like that. Men gotta spend more money on me now in order to gain my respect

Yes, disrespect towards you and probably disrespect to that new person too. This speaks volumes about what they said and what they didn't do to honor your wishes. The true colors have shown. I think it's that you didn't want to believe he was really like that. Like Matthew said, better to know now than 6 years later.

You can’t take it personally all you can do is keep yourself together.Always 💕

Your words are healing… almost the same situation, that hurts so much

Mattew has the most reasonable and sensitive approach on these matters. love it

What I Love about this Video ist Not only the deph and wisdom of your Insights but also your empathy about the issue. I am very touched by inspiring US to move on and more. Thanks so much, Matt🌅🌸💙

My partner of 6 years broke up with me over text. This alone tells so much about his character. This video opened my eyes to some of his character flaws that I've always ignored. 6 years is indeed a lot of of time to cause irreparable damage to someone and I've been subjected to that but now, through these videos, I'm able to make sense of everything that's happened which is helping me get my closure. Thanks alot Matthew.

Exactly what I needed right now. Thank you, Matthew! 😊

How to spot a guy whose secretly planning his exit plan! Signs to watch for before it happens so you can take back control of your life!! Matthew's next video topic. 😁

Thank you!!!! Hearing this video really solidified my decision to cut all ties with my ex. I learned my ex (of almost 10 years) had immediately began trying to date other women after the breakup. The decision was never something I wanted, but the disrespect had grown completely out of control and he simply did not value my presence in his life. Leaving, I foolishly assumed, would force him to realize I wasn't going to take his disloyalty any longer. I had hoped through counseling he would realize how certain behaviors were damaging our relationship and make the necessarychanges needed to be together healthily. Nope! Initially I chalked his desire to date so quickly up to a deep need for companionship as he isn't a person who functions well alone. It bothered me, but I still kept hope alive that he'd eventually come around. NOPE! I hadn't spoken to him in almost a year and after inserting himself back into my life without warning, all those feelings of longing came rushing back, feelings I'd fought so desperately to suppress. Seeing him again causedbme to reach out and I admitted my feelings, as did he. Well, it was no more than 2 days later when I learned he had been trying SUPER hard to begin a relationship with a woman who low and behold, I always believed he would go after had we ever parted ways. It especially hurt to hear the things he had been saying about me TO her. We also found out he had been lying to both of us....she was surprised, me, not so much. Another thing that really, really hurt is that in speaking to thus woman, she basicslly detailed his tactics in trying to date her....it was EXACTLY how he hooked me: let me tell you my sib story of how terribly my ex treated me....feel sorry for me so I can manipulate you just as I did the last one. Thank goodness she's much more wise as I because she could sense the manipulation as he explained he wasn't the problem in either his previous failed marriage or our 10 year run. Last night I had a deep conversation with a few close friends that kept trying to convince me my ex regrets messing up and still wants me. It made me extremely angry because knowing the truth, I tried to lay out the evidence but it fell on deaf ears. It (stupidly) made me start to see a glimmer of hope again (STUPID!!) Well, thank you for this video, Matt. My ex was NOT "my person". I desperately wanted him to be. Never felt love so deeply before, but unfortunately he never felt the same un return and I will NEVER again hold faith in an illusion. Thank you enormously for the work that you do. I am so appreciative 💛

Dear Mike, listening to you every day whenever I am sitting alone, contemplating on a recent heart-wrencing breakup, has been one of my primary support to get going. It feels like I am listening to a best friend that I don't have. Truly grateful for your wise and useful advice.

I gave him 4 years, same situation with this girls story. I would bring something up, he would change for a time and then do it over again. I put in the work to change myself and he never put in the work because he was “helping me”. He ended it with me, honestly if he hadn’t I would have wasted more time because I always wanted to look at what was positive in the relationship. I learned that as much as you love someone and respect them you can’t force them to respect you too.

Needed to hear this one. Sounded somewhat similar to my previous relationship and this gave me some great insights. Thank you ❤️

Its important in the relation to have trust faith and understand with each other...if any problem will come they already willing to help each other to fix the problem. And be patient with each other.

Had this happen to me after a 10yr relationship. They moved on so fast and it made me feel angry they didnt reflect + grieve the decade we had together.

I do understand the need to move on and stop romanticizing fantasy but I cant help and think that it isnt as black and white as people think. I really wanna hold on to hope that some people are meant to lose each other first before finding each other again.

Matthew is always an encouragement. Love his energy. Love from a growing RU-vidr 💕

My gosh, thank you. This one helped me sort shit out inside of my head. Similar to my situation, feels like you just described it. Thank you!!!

Spot on video and energy around creating a balanced perspective on these kinds of situations.

I feel like this is a typical rebound that will eventually fail. Could be wrong due to the length of the relationship but if it's a serious relationship then a serious time to recover is a must

I would also like to take a shot at answering this poor girls question Hi ik I'm a total stranger and you'll prolly never see this but I'm sure this message will help someone. To answer your primary question your relationship wasn't in your head. What you experienced was real the person just wasn't the right one. He's happy now but give it like two weeks his happiness from entering a relationship will subside and the pain from losing you will set in since he tried to ignore it. Listen just cause he's moved on doesn't mean he's actually moved on you'll always be a part of him. Your time with him can never be undone, the memories will always exist, the arguments, the passion, the tears you cried, and the scars left on your heart are all the same for him whether he wants to accept it or not. You will always leave a impact. Now for the underlying question "What should I be feeling/What do I do." Or we'll that's what I perceived as the underlying question I could be wrong after all I'm no guru just a chill dude on RU-vid. Regardless here's my take on it, you brush off your shoulders, grab your phone, text your friends and set up a lunch/date/event of some kind kick back and relax. Take your time and allow yourself to cultivate the melancholy that's being felt. Once it's cultivated you'd be surprised how Positive something so "Negative" could become.

Crying while watching this.. thank you, gives closure🥺

This saved my heart, there is light at the end of the tunnel

I really had to write down what you said,so I can repeatly read it and never forget it. Thanks again Mathew

It is also possible that the 'other person' was there the whole time so the possibility of the Ex moving on quickly was even stronger. 🍒

I’m so over trying to find someone. No one will ever hurt me again.

The last line really hit me deep. And this is the first time since my breakup i actually feel better because the exact same situation happened with he also broke up after 6 months on text. And Matthew you are right i should be glad that I'm now I'm not the subject for his character flaws!

You got a very calming voice !

Yes but it’s all about changing our mindset which prevents us from getting depressed about this situation

Thank you Matthew! You you always great and know what to say. Your videos really helped me a lot.

Thank you so much for this video, Matthew. I love your advice, because it is applicable in so many different situations and circumstances. So relatable and helpful!

Very precise analysis and optimistic. Thank you

I really needed to hear this. Thank you!

They leave during the relationship, so moving on seems faster to the other person

i’ve always been kind, in my romantic relationships and friendships. i gave him my world, i put him first. he hurt me multiple times and i still let him back in. now he is living his life 2 weeks later while i’m stuck alone in the dark because for once i put myself first (breaking up)

Going through this at the moment. Only thing is, we have a child together. Hard to get over when you have to be constantly reminded of it/her. Through the exchanging of our kid, having to still see her every other day. Life can be so cruel.

Wow Matt! I needed this!!!! You're the best ❤

Dear matthew, thank you so much for this video. I am feeling like I have my best friend sitting near and talking to me.. thank you

Hi Matthew. I'm glad I watched this video. It was clearly explained to me. It doesn't matter of its 6 months or 6 years. In my case it was wrong relationship to begin with. And I have to tell the truth that I trusted him fully to move here in 🇺🇸 with him. The truth is I was blind and lied , falling into a relationship that will end up shortly.

Well done, sir. Well done.

this is one of the most painful stories ive ever heard, omg im feeling so sorry for you!!

For me the true pain is that there won't be anyone better than him. But even worse, that he'll find someone else - not necessarily love, even if he found someone just to F I'd feel heartbroken.

I'm a guy trying to get the girl i want and I have to say Matthew hussey you have helped me so much with your advice , I just reverse your videos from the girl wanting to get the guy to the guy wanting to get the girl.

The video I needed at this moment 😔

I feel what I was seeing initially was a different love language and specifically when I asked him. However, when after 3 1/2 years I get a breakup text, my heart was broken. I’m not sure how to heal but I have managed to keep my head up even to watching him with another person. I’m more than that ❤ I’m thankful u said that comment about text breaking up because I was like is there something I did to deserve this yet knowing I would never do that to someone ❤ I honestly feel like he is emotionally unavailable however I did not deserve that. I gave my all to our relationship and I admit I was perfect but I had amazing qualities that anyone would love ❤

I hate breakups on phone!

Bless you, Matthew.

Thank you for doing what you do 🙏🏽

My ex and I were absolutely happy (as I saw it) and got involved in a community musical. I as the set designer, he as the lead. He ended up getting emotionally involved with the female lead and dumping me before the show started (last week). And has gotten together with her simultaneously. He told me all the right things and showed me all the passion over our 7 months together. I am still in shock at the abrupt ending. What he told me on breaking up was "I love you, but I'm not in love with you". Hard to believe he was that good of a liar for this long. He claimed that he was saying all the right things to deepen his feelings that weren't there yet. Seems he's chasing the all elusive feeling of infatuation that he thinks is love, and hurting everyone along the way in his selfishness. I'm devastated. He was so convincing and I feel so betrayed. Is his judgement clouded by his new feelings, or did he truly never love me?

checking in!! love your videos even if it doesn't apply to me sometimes LOL

I gave 5.5 years of my life in a relationship with a person who then finished by text!! It’s taken me 2 years including 7 months of weekly councilling to get over this relationship.

Breaking up by text after 6 months..well in my case after 3 years he just ghosted me, that's even worse you know 🙁

Great vedio, thank you Matthew.

This is difficult to appreciate because I was dumped by a lying cheater after 4 yrs of him saying things just like that, "you're the women of my dreams" "I've never loved anyone like this". I'm so heart broken by just the years of games and lies. How will I ever believe another guy by his words or actions again? I realize my fault of excusing red flags, but seriously, how do you trust anyone?

The new girl in this story is being deliberately unkind and the letter writer should block her. The new girl is feeling insecure in the relationship even if the ex-BF is not.

7:43 This really applies to my ex right now. Glad I finally found the courage to end it. I'm happy to see myself growing and act mature.

All of those tips are great, especially try not looking them up, be it in a form of a conversation or simply checking them on socials be it their posts, stories, followings, activity status, those things can seem initally harmless, however they can be quite dangerous and damaging to your mental well being and healing, in fact the more you do such thing the longer you prolong your own pain and healing, for several reasons you can thing that you need to do those things but honestly none of the "reasons" your mind comes up with isn't truly good enough and worth it. In fact your peace shouldn't be based on what your ex is doing or not doing, how they are feeling themselves, I understand that certain thoughts or scenarios can be very upsetting, dissapointing, even disrespectful, but honestly it doesn't matter, and sometimes it can even feel like you've been lied to if they have told you such things such as "i want to be on my own, i want to figure myself out" "relationships aren't for me" but bottomline is that regardless if their actions and behavior matches the reason of them walking away, they decided to walk away, and not putting in the work for relationships was more important to them then all of the things they'd have to let go off by walking away, they chose themselves, their needs, and pretty much their selfishness, so don't in anyway after break up try to remain "connected to them" by checking their activities that do not concern you, and if you ended everything in a "civil" way and are still friends on socials simply mute them and their activites and don't go to their page, because while it can feel reliving or even make you feel you are in control, in most cases such activites are just gonna cause obssesive and intrusive thoughts, in facts you are gonn be overthinking about them and what they are and aren't doing, how they can possibly be feeling, so just stop, i know that it can feel soothing to know that the other person is struggling too, or they haven't started anything with anyone yet, but honestly at some point they are gonna be moved on in all senses possible, wish them well if you can, but most importantly don't prolong your healing, move on, let go of them completely, even let go of some breadcrumbs, you'r ex shouldn't be the reason you feel comforted, especially after putting you through a great discomfort. Focus on yourself, don't think or try to get info on what they are probably doing now, save yourself all of the anxiety and overthinking. None of their actions define anything related to you, they don't conern you, you don't concern them, it''s over, accept it trully, don't try to hold back some bits and pieces, and let go so you can truly move on and heal. Take care of yourselves.

Rest assured that that last at the beginning of the relationship will dwindle big time and he will find

Ive just found out my ex of about 5/6 months has started seeing someone new. I was a little upset at first, but actually realised its quite liberating. I don’t have to spend all my Time wondering if there is still something there, or wondering what they are up to etc. The truth, however difficult, will set you free

2 weeks or so after 2 years with a guy i work with. now i get to see them everyday. it’s all about accountability on my end, i need to choose better women.