Why Did You Put "That Sign" Story ? 

Are people really not smart enough to realize it's gonna hurt if you touch sensitive parts after touching spicey foods?

I've probably told this before. A while back (while my mother and our cat at the time were still alive and we had the wooden fence, so maybe twenty years?) there was an incident. Someone walked along our fence with their dog. Dog proceeds to lift their leg at our fence. Cat proceeds to whack dog through the slit under the fence. Dog owner is angry. You know, stuff like this would not happen if you didn't teach your dog to use other people's gardens as toilets. Our cat was only defending her territory. And not crossing the property boundary.

We had a sign in the toilets at my work. It read 'Please don't consume alcohol on the premises. We have your number plates.' The area manager told us to get rid of it. I work in a petrol station and number of people who buy booze and down it in the toilets in scary. We are talking vodka, wine and brandy, then DRIVE away. We call it in to police but never hear anything back.

My favorite sign I've seen in a home improvement store: "Do Not Cut Glass On Vertical Saw!"

Ostomy care can be absolutely wild, had one lady who drank nothing but vodka for years and her poop had actually separated and settled at the bottom and the vodka still smelled like vodka. Another lady had been leaking on the wrong side of her stomach through a scar and found out that her old ostomy hole had been "used" prior to the new one

to add to the military danger list: if you die/ are injured doing one of those things, the military dont pay out

One of Sydney’s main railway stations really needed signs that read don’t pee in the gardens. Every day a friend saw the same woman sitting on the edge of one the raised garden beds, one day she was close enough to notice the puddle forming behind her.

I'd LIKE to know the story behind the sign at the Spyder roller coaster ride at Lagoon amusement park in Utah. You might even be able to find the one I'm talking about by googling key words. It's a purple, steel fence top near the end of the waiting line, basically a bunch of spear tips lined up side by side, and a sign on it that says "Please Do Not Sit On The Fence". (I think, it's something like that) Might've been put up preemptively when they installed it, or maybe someone mega skewered their own rump roast.

Back in 2020 before the full lockdowns hit my area but people were being ordered to mask up i went to the grocery store for my family. When i was checking out i saw a sign on the card machine which said something along the lines of - Please do not use hand sanitizer on the pin pad. We have wipes to disinfect it that you can ask for. - I saw that and i looked at the cashier and said "im a bit scared to ask but what happened that they put up that sign? Apparently someone had literally dumped an entire BOTTLE of hand sanitizer on a self checkout machine. We arent talking little purse size bottle either. No this was one of those great big bottles used to refill others. Needless to say the machine shorted out and died. And now every single machine had that sign on it.

I am the reason for the new sign at work. Didn't check an ovens temperature setting before putting something in it. Instead of the 200 degrees it was normally at, it was set to 400 and set the cardboard inside on fire. Ya my bosses weren't happy 😂😂😂

The "MT" thing is a thing everywhere. I'm a welder/fabricator and probably around 50% of the gas bottles have the letters "MT" on them, and I've seen it all over the country too.

When in high school when I did Tarkwondo, we had one challenge where two people were on either side of a large sandbag and you had to push/drag it around the other person to get it past a line behind them. If you got kicked while holding the bag, you got push-ups. Well, due to lack of restriction, I kicked the bag instead of grabbing it. The teachers couldn’t say anything. Well, I was going against a black belt (I was a massive kid) so the bag got pushed out of bounds and we both got push-ups. But then the next round was between two yellow belts who were like 6 and could hardly move it, but they still tired to kick it. After literally half an hour, the slightly stronger of the two had pushed it like 10 feet in his favor, but at that rate we wouldn’t have enough time left of class. I had a serious “what have I done” moment. It was a few moments actually. Then one of the tiny kids fell forwards onto the bag, which let the other one kick them and win that round. We stopped class a little early that day so this wouldn’t happen again. When we did the exercise again the next week, you were only allowed to move the sandbag with your hands.

I feel like if someone starts off saying the topic doesnt apply to them (i.e. you ask women about something and a bunch of men answer instead) you shouldnt read those. Read only the ones that actually apply to your topic. Its okay if they tell someone elses story A.L.A. it fits the topic.

Am I having deja vu or have these stories been played before?

Story 24: I thought the only answer to the dog food question would be "woof!"

Always be the reason a new rule gets made

24:45 she wanted to look good for her funeral/didn’t want to be as pale as the other ghosts.

Last night I was reading the rules for our local parks and recreation to see if I can find my drone or not in the park and there is a role that says park visitors are prohibited from molesting the wildlife and waterfoul. I wonder what happened for that rule to be added I don't even want to know lol

#5 There's some phrasing in this story that makes me think it's an extended joke, not a real story. Alex sounds an awful lot like Alice. Alice Doesn't Live Here Any More (1974) is an early Martin Scorsese film that won 2 Oscars and 4 BAFTAs. It's also the basis for the long-running TV sitcom Alice (1976-85). It's awfully suspicious that the writer of story 5 kept repeating the line "Alex doesn't live her any more" in that exact phrasing.

Mr. Happy 💀

"how do i unlearn something" ctrl-z, my friend. ctrl-z

Story 8: I feel like the kid's mother might be a Karen 🤔

Back when I used to work in a bakery, I had a customer come up to me with the suggestion of putting up a sign that stated the little rings we would put on cupcakes were not edible. Just to make it clear, this was a GROWN MAN who mistook a brown plastic bunny ring for chocolate. We did not put up a sign

Frick you story number 8

Dude, you have seriously got to start giving a shit about your titles. Spelling things wrong and leaving out entire words may get you clicks for a bit, but confusing your audience isn't going to make them want to watch your videos. People don't watch videos if they don't have any information on what it will actually be about. There are better ways to summarize or phrase a question more succinctly without sacrificing clarity.

Are you TRYING to make the worst titles? Almost made me not click

This whole episode is a repeat.

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