Why do people talk shit behind your back and how to handle it? 

People talk behind’s someone back when they haven’t done anything to you is out of jealousy

Thank you man, this helped me realize that if people wanna talk smack then that’s their problem not mine

I needed this because I was gonna get violent but I can’t lower myself to who they are because I’m meant to be above them

i just found out my only "real friend" was a ctually talking behind my back/making fun of me

What people feel/say about you is none of your business. That being said it's hard when it's family.

Thankyou man. Your son is blessed to have you. most of those people he’s worried about won’t matter in 5 years anyway.

I live in a small town and everyones talking about my back this is going to be hard to try and ignore them it's annoying because they dont know me well enough to try and talk behind my back so this helped me a lot

I deleted Facebook and Instagram. My life is so much better.

Short answer: Ignore them because they are cowards that's why they don't say it to ur face.

I think humans have an instinct to talk behind someone’s back, like it’s in their nature and they’ve done it lots of times throughout the man history, so now it’s like a normal way of life to talk behind someone’s back. But this kind of behavior manly happens on social media, and in schools, workplaces etc. As many people don’t even know they are being back chatted about, but some people can sense people talking behind their back throughout their instincts. As body language can tell people a lot, you may seem very short with the person you’re talking behind as you know they might find out what you’ve said, or even know what you’ve said. But Chinese whispers go on a lot in my school, that’s why I just stay out of everyone’s business and be very wise with picking my friends

I be hearing people talk crap behind my back I be hearing them in the next room like duh I can hear you they very bold about it

people talk bad about me for no reason in school behind my back :((( and i dont even talk to them

When I was in Highschool my classmates always talk shit about me for being different, cus Im a transferee. I realized that they are bringing me down to make themselves feel good and look good in front of their mates. But boy I learned to be wiser

A person in my gym class was talking about me and said I was really weird and that they didn’t like me. My friend told cause she overheard. I literally talked to this person once. It really hurts. I don’t want people to about me badly, and I didn’t want any drama with anyone. I care so much about what people think about me it actually sucks.

My son is very sympathetic, and kind hearted also. My favorite advice for him all the time is ... 1- only you define who you are and nobody else does. Think about your intentions and if they're always good, that's what matters. Don't let anybody tell you who you are. I also tell him it's good to analyze yourself in your behaviors and your triggers. 2- you only responsible for the words you intended to say or actions you intended to do and you are not responsible for how others interpret it. They are twisting your words and turning your intentions into negative Simply tell him that's unacceptable you're not gonna do that. 3-it's OK to confront people no matter what position they hold. People in high positions are not always right, and they definitely are no better than anybody else. If you confront them in the proper manner, you have every right to do that.

My only true friend..is myself. I always share the positive freely with all..and refuse to let anyone or anything take it away

This was such good advice. I'm similar like your son in regards to empathy. Nobody told me as a kid though, so I am still struggling with abusive people taking advantage of me to this very day.

It's because they're too scared to say it to my face.

People who talk about someone behind thier back and not to thier face are cowards

I just really want to thank you with all my heart, thank you sir God bless you! Because what you said is absolutely true to the max When Haters, naysayers say you or try to tell others to "hate" u. They seem that they are trying to be the good guy/Samaritan to educate others on how bad of a person you are in the hope to be seen as an angel. And is easy for me to get affected. Just like yr son, I'm an empath so I take things like this super super fast! And in a bad way, it can cause emotional distress. But what u said abt really understanding "what's their agenda". Are they truly bothered or they just want you to feel bad to be able to gain something! And when you put things into perspective and see the larger picture, you will realize that hey that hater isn't like intentionally trying to be the good guy educate others to don't like u because he "cares" for others. He just wanted others to look at him like the good guy to gain favors! It's always easy to react because we are humans. We react to distress but its always at best to cool it, look at it from a wider angle. Analyze and truly realize that, when u figure out someone's agenda. You are able to better plan yr tactics when fighting it! And for that, I would like to thank you sir for awakening that in me because I'm going thru a hard time now. And this, made me realize things I thought I couldn't! Thank you sir, God bless you!

Thank you for this great advice. You have said exactly the truth,intentions matter at the end of the day always and we have to figure them out. Know our intention and the other person's intention.

In my experience, you should always be weary of people who constantly complain and talk trash about other people. You may think you’re cool with those people, but they’re likely talking about you as well.

Listening to this makes me feel to cry... because this is exactly what happened to me. However, ignoring them has to go with practice.... especially when “emotions are involved “. But thanks man appreciate. Love from Trinidad and Tobago 🇹🇹

Great video and kind words! Absolutely agree with your message! Some people just have nothing better to do besides talk about others in a negative way because it makes themselves feel important. Stay at it! 👊😀

It is a simple as this: ones who talk behind your back , you make them feel some type of way about themselves. You see, they KNOW that you know, without a doubt or question, who you are and they will say anything to make you question yourself. They'll talk bad about you to someone else just to have them question it as well. It should give you great pride that they talk about you, do not feel bad that they do, carry yourself with extreme light- because you are the light. They are trying to dim.

Thank you for this. I really needed this today because of my fear of someone twisting my words/actions even if I don't have any intention of hurting or offending someone. I've had that trauma that I feel like I'm the "bad" person because of how people judge me resulting to a negative feedback from others. But because of this, I was enlightened and decided to stop doubting myself. Thank you!

Thank you to share this. I’m literally facing my depression now because of my personal life problem and to those people who I used to call them MY FRIENDS turned out they played me. Planned to destroy me and talking bad stuff behind my back. All these cause me really big bad time in my life which I never get through it yet. But your video makes me understand why they’ve done all that. It’s not an accident it’s not a white lies stuff it’s nothing but hated. I can’t do anything but leave them and walked away. Hope they have a great life continue living with their jealousy mental illness.

Thanks buddy, this was a huge peace maker for me. There are people who go around spoiling my relationship behind my back and I just don't understand it because I don't even know these people at a personal level. They over hear somethings and assume. They lie to reflect their own insecurities. And I just feel like confronting them. There was a time when I was extremely focused on my studies that any guy who wanted to date me, I simply ignored them. I really didn't feel any emotional connection with them in order for me to go ahead. I had no time to date and flirt around. I just wanted to study. These very men went out telling everyone that I have a lot of attitude and I have been doing things that's none of their business. People gossip and it turns ugly and the next moment you find out that you're a laughing stock. I try ignoring it but then when my parents over hear those gossips about me, that really starts affecting my personal health and emotional well being. At that moment I just feeling like getting a hold of that source and asking as if you are a perfect human being and ask if they are God that they got that right to judge someone whom you don't even know.

This really help me today and it keeps me from hurting my self I'm so sick of everyone picking on me or talking about me so bad like nobody understands me I'm not a bad person:"""( they just love to put me down idk why

Thank you for your insights, brother 🙏🏾

I think what you're doing is great. Glad to know there's somebody else out here spreading those words to the young ones or anybody that needs to hear it. Some of the elders haven't learned it yet, so it's good for them too.

Thank you so much!! this video really helped me

Thank you. This is the most on point message yet this perspective is so unique.

Thank you for this video, I necessarily needed this

You make a great point. Technically, intention is important. Hope your son well

10:19 that is relatable to me right now I needed to hear this and understand this thank you for helping me get the hell out of this negative mindset I had an hour ago over some dramatic crybaby…

Mate thankyou so much!!! This advice was so helpful. Seriously man, changed my whole approach to a certain situation!

No idea what the benefit of nit picking me all day long , but the world is watching it . Help.

I listen to this, this morning. Really helpful 😊

Thanks for that. It’s still a shitty feeling when you realise something like this has been happening to you yet no one will be up front and tell you. I have trouble letting go of those feelings. My anxiety is my worst enemy.

Gracias! Necesitaba escuchar esto!!! Muchas gracias!!!!

Thank you 🙏🏻

Thank you man like really thank you your video put me in a different mind set I recently lost a good job paying me $21.90 a hour due to chasing my ex girlfriend that worked there and didn’t want shit to do with me told my personal business on what I’ve been dealing with as far as getting help but the thing is I tried so hard to get her to understand I loved her it was always bumps in the road she didn’t want her family knowing about me cause I’m black & she’s salvadorian and I stopped loving myself to please her and always wanted to make her happy and I lost myself in the process as well as my job behind all this while she still works there and it’s been hard to deal with but I needed this I really did thanks man.

This helped me from what i heard right next to my ears. Thankyou very much.

Everyone in my school chats behind my back and say I act to hard and that before I used to act like a crybaby so why am I acting hard now

My Mom Hangs out with people in her family who are really poor in Tijuana Mexico Border and their houses are made out of thin wood, pallets and cardboard you can tell that they talk shit about us because we are well off everytime we go visit we dont show off or try and act like were better than them but some of them really think that we are trying to be better than them for some reason when we are not my Mom taught us better than that and we are all humble. Every time I say "Hi" my cousins they kind of act like they dont care and Ive finally came to find out they been talking smack about us my mom helps them out financially alot and they still have the audacity to pretend to be her good friends when all they care about is 💰 they are Lazy and dont want to work hard but yet they talk smack because they see us well off and assume that we think we are higher than them when that had never even crossed my mind, im ready to cut off their toxic relationship.

i've been backstabbed and feel like my friends are talking behind my back :/

Love it!

This is so true,, I am working j the same place for about 9 years now and 4 years ago I came to know that the person who I was talking most of the time she was a coward. She talk behind back of every single person she talks to, when I came to know I started ignoring her and doesn't consider what she says about anyone. She always have a judgment to make on every single person and it's really brain washing anyone's mind. I feel so better after reducing all the conversations we use to have and NM ow I don't even care what she says.

My closest people from relatives talk behind my back without me doing anything to them, they're trying so hard to make me look bad and I don't know why... I'm so frustrated

Stumbled across this. Pretty good. I subscribed

Never thought about that the intention is behind it...having issues at work.

What an awesome dad, you are. I didn't have one like you, but I'm definitely being a mom like you. Heck yeah break those chains. Woo woo.

great, i love it!

Thank you, man.

thanks for making this video, this refreshed my mindset on life and communications with people around me :)

Thank you so much for helping me out 😍👍

Thanks! for this great lesson this lesson gives me the perfect mindset for my holelife in this situation 😊👍

Thanks for making this video

I love your approached thank you for sharing this nice message.👍 I learned something from it. And I agree when you said that as long as you don't owe anybody or you if you didn't do anything wrong you can sleep good at night that's the "conscience". Nice message👍

thank you for this

wow!! this is so great!~~ Thanks so much

I appreciate this at work it's difficult I had someone spreading negativity and talking about me and everyone else. I say let them talk I know my worth and I'm learning to let things go I'm very empathetic I'm trying to learn to do better

Wow, I love it because you went right into intentions after I did my last comment. We are definitely on the same page.❤

😌Thanks man I got the answers

Had this bully at college who got banned from college today my friend told me that he was calling me a pussy on the phone behind my back I think it’s just stupid of people to do it behind your back but can’t say it to your face rip bullies

When people talk behind my back I don’t pay them no mind they are just jealous of me I just move on and ignore them I don’t need negative people in my life

Thanks for the advice this problem bothering me for a long time

Thank you sir your video I learn some thing to you god bless to all!!!!

I heard my boss badmouth about me to another employee. The things I heard from him shattered me to the soul. I wish I can get over it someday. It was Hard to believe that someone would have so much hatred for me. 😞

Thank you

I'm always worried about what people think about me and I also think everyone hates me and talks about me behind my back. I always want to know why they say the things they do. What did I do to provoke their behavior, but I guess that's it. It's THEIR behavior. So it's like I stick to myself and don't bother anyone yet they hate me for it. It's so hard to ignore it. Sometimes I want to ask them why. Sometimes I hope bad things happen to them. Sometimes I pray for them to self heal, but I can't ever just not give it my attention. I'm struggling on how to regulate my emotions every day and when these situations happen I don't know what to do. It's tough. I'm also scared they want to hurt me as well. So do I hurt them before they hurt me? Do I just ignore it as best as I can until they first get physical with me and then have to protect myself. I'm like an emotional roller coaster.

Thank you!

Very good imput to think about. I don't always think of how people benefit from criticism but in their manipulate minds they sure can.

I’ve noticed over the past few months my friend for over 5 years has been talking bs behind my back and this hasn’t been the first time. My friend use to be friends names “jack” (made up name) they always bullied me but I never thought it was a lot. Then he got close to another friend and talked bs behind my back again but now they dont say it infront of me cause I can stand up to some of the bullying that happens. I’m trying to separate from them but fact of the matter is I have no friends.

This was so amazing 🥲

Great show this kind of happened to me but I forget sometimes

Great video and great saying in Spanish carnal. I think that this is a really important and valuable message my man, Specially for our young ones,and it is all about intention. Good luck to panchito jr. And congrats on your social media success. Que dios me los bendiga, Your friend, Chris.

I really needed this this girl was talking smack about me because I was freinds with people she didn’t like and then she just started progressing into more hurtful things but you know what I’m her loss she’s not mine

Ignoring isnt not always an option. I basically been outcasted because my supposed best friend was jealous of me and where talking shit in my back. I let it go and lost valuable friendships

Great video bro

I m moroccan and sometimes i have an accent in my talking, so today my "best friend" for 5yrs and a friend i know this yr start making fun of it next to, u know when thdy make fun of u in front of u with whispering and laughing, whenever i talk they start this. What hurt me is that best fds don't do that to each other, normaly they got each other s back

Man I've dealt with this noise plenty of times with my cousins. My family always supported them emotionally and financially yet we get treated like outsiders and they talk shit about us. Its funny because one of them lost their job because he thought I was supposed to be his forever ride since we used to work the same job.

Ive been dealing with this for almost 3 years now.also i have a toxic family so it isnt easy for me

Should I finish this relationship?

Thank you man I had a fight 3 years ago and I lost and loads of people in a different school are complaining about it and still talking about it behind my back Francisco's what should I do

thank you

So in essence you're just projecting youre out dated believes onto youre own kids.

I like your show sir I learn something to share to my son god bless you sir

Theyll talk weather everything is going good theyll talk when everything is going bad. Pay them no attention.

I hear my dad talk shit about me everyday but I dont care I walk past him everyday like I dont know him..

ty, really

changed from one of the best schools in my country to be in a public school with my friends long story short they arent my friends anymore and now are trying to bully me (5v1) i stick up for myself best i can but man im so tired idk what to do

You know what is the worse that you trusted someone and at the moments you are not there they twisted and make their own version of it.

Thank you so much for this! It really helped me! True ..”El que nada debe, nada teme!”

I disagree that if you hurt someone despite having 'good' intentions that 'it is on them'. Remember the saying that ' The road to Hell is paved with good intentions'? Many unspeakable acts have been carried out with 'Good' intentions. For me it is better to take ownership of ALL of your intentions both 'good' and 'bad' and if you don't like the things you are doing, then work on eliminating those actions from your life.

thank you. I'm trying not to have an anxiety attack bc I just saw one girl that reopened wounds for me... Story: I knew girl A who struggled with mental health, and sometimes I'd ask her how shes doing, and comfort her, bc I thought thats what good friends do. And I even told her she can tell me if I do smt she doesn't like, so that I know not to do that anymore. Well... Instead of telling me she didn't want me to ask how she's doing, she told everyone else. I found out bc I overheard her talking shit abt me behind my back. She also made me have an anxiety attack in a school bathroom, bc she got mad at me over a misunderstanding, and thus decided to guilt trip me by telling me that I trigger her. And ofc, back then I still wanted to be a good friend to her, so I asked what I did that triggered her, and guess what? She goes like "oh I don't want to make you upset by telling you 🙃" 1. I was already upset bc I thought I was a horrible person and a horrible friend. 2. The misunderstanding got cleared up, and she acted so casual like nothing happened, but for months afterwards I felt like I was constantly walking on extra fragile eggshells around her BC I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT BEHAVIOUR "triggered" her. 3. She definitely did it on purpose bc she was mad at me. So, she definitely shit talked me to girl B, and twisted the narrative abt me to make me look like a bad person. Well, a few weeks ago I moved, and today guess who I saw; girl B. I just want to cry and disappear. I want my mom to come comfort me. I feel like girl B could be shit talking abt me right now... I don't want to see girl A or B. Girl A shattered my self-esteem and girl B believes what girl A says. I just wish I could tell girl B the truth abt what really happened, but I'm too afraid to even look at her.

What if when they talk behind you're back but you think that it's true?

I've been called out multiple times by ny own best friend behind my back and in front of me. He tries to make me jealous whenever he can, says I can't talk to girls but he can. Basically better than me in every way. Do I have a toxic Friend?

Confront gossipers and they will crumble like dry leaves.