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Why Narcissists are Successful: Cat- vs. Grin Narcopaths (Narcissism Cheshire Effect) 

Prof. Sam Vaknin
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If narcissists are delusional and disconnected from reality, how come they are more successful than many normal people?
The modern economy, definitely in the last hundred years, but more so after 1990, is about the manipulation of symbols within fantastic spaces.
Narcissism Cheshire Effect
Cat narcopaths vs. smile narcopaths: cat ones focus on rewards and goals in outside world, smile ones emphasize how these rewards make them feel, on their inner world, which is often fantastic.
Narcissists are successful precisely because they are delusional and disconnected from reality.
The narcissist, throughout his life, from a very early age, as a child, had invented an imaginary friend and then a godlike figure, the false self, and spent the rest of his life interacting symbolically in a fantastic space.
In the modern economy, in the modern world, narcissism is a positive adaptation.
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25 фев 2024

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Комментарии : 100   
@Sehill0011
@Sehill0011 4 месяца назад
Mine plays video games for hours. He then talks like the things he did in the game are real. He will tell people " I flew a plane into a war zone," and other ridiculous stuff. It's crazy.
@co5mo
@co5mo 4 месяца назад
mine was only happy on vacations same thing
@XenaXOE
@XenaXOE 4 месяца назад
Are we living the same life😮 my narc boyfriend does the same. It’s like he’s addicted to the feeling of being the “hero” of the game, achieving all these fake accomplishments because he has no ambition or accomplishments in the real world 😢
@perrylindsey2481
@perrylindsey2481 4 месяца назад
Mine became the head chair of mohs surgery at Harvard's Dana Farber cancer institute
@theIIkeyIIIgenerator
@theIIkeyIIIgenerator 4 месяца назад
Keyword is realm , better beliebe yours he is right. You doing the Same with reality he copy
@jbuntine1255
@jbuntine1255 4 месяца назад
My X drank 2 slabs of beer , smoked pot X5 bottles Red and 2 pouches of Tabacco More than $300. A week And in the end took 140K from joint bank account ,and maintained his bank account from mummy in EU that he never separated from, Oh how she hated me.... sick And he only worked 7yrs of an 18 yr marriage..
@latlayfotfoy2709
@latlayfotfoy2709 4 месяца назад
They take more than they give. They convince, they pretend, they promise and if they don't get what they want, they do the same thing elsewhere.
@NadineLalonde
@NadineLalonde 4 месяца назад
Prof. Eric McLuhan: "The body is everywhere assaulted by all of our new media, a state which has resulted in deep disorientation of intellect and destabilization of culture throughout the world. In the age of disembodied communication, the meaning and significance and experience of the body is utterly transformed and distorted." Physical/Reality base vs Fantasy/Digital. Stay real. May the 17% prevail. Stay real.
@SMILEY.45
@SMILEY.45 4 месяца назад
A girl I knew literally had a Cheshire Cat tattoo like it was a warning sign haha
@pqt112
@pqt112 4 месяца назад
Every black person needs to watch this video. We keep losing because we are too real. This system is not made for us. Nigerians are the most successful black group because they know how to manipulate reality (i.e. scam culture).
@Suddenmindfulness
@Suddenmindfulness 4 месяца назад
So, so true. It’s clear as day, to me. Thank you for saying this!
@moonliightbae
@moonliightbae 4 месяца назад
Hi Professor Sam Vaknin. Although this comment is unrelated to this video, I just wanted to say thank you for your work and for explaining everything so eloquently, I love listening to your videos. You really put everything into perspective for why and how personality disorders develop in the brain since birth. In response to one of your other videos, you mentioned that you were getting heat for saying borderlines are psychopaths, but I wanted to tell you that I %100 agree with you instead. I am a borderline myself, and I indeed had very psychopathic behaviours since childhood with my narc mum. I had VERY evil thoughts against others who would hurt me even only at age 7... I also used to lash out a lot at home, and do crazy things like stealing, lighting things on fire, jumping the neighbours fence, and I didn't even know why I did these things, it gave me thrills and I did them in secret. NOBODY would ever guess that I was ever like this. But I was also very quiet and reserved. I was always extremely empathetic towards the ones that made me feel comfortable. I always thought I was just born an evil kid, but I recently, after 25 years into my life, learnt that this wasn't my fault at all and was in fact because of my evil mother. I hope to purchase your book one day :)
@sunu84
@sunu84 4 месяца назад
My partner Narcissist is so lucky with money. I think it's the fact that he believes so much that he deserves money and success that makes the law of attraction successful. He deceives a lot of people in order to sell, he lies compulsively, he even steals a cake from the supermarket.
@djmidas7
@djmidas7 4 месяца назад
😂a cake.
@dominusbalial835
@dominusbalial835 4 месяца назад
he has a crap load of money and needs to steal snacks? it's probably not the food that they're after but the gratification of stealing it from a organization
@systemicsystems703
@systemicsystems703 4 месяца назад
Sounds like a sociopath. Maybe you should see the signs?
@Lucidtherealone
@Lucidtherealone 2 месяца назад
I didn't think there were red flags until I read that he's a cake thief
@Rothinger
@Rothinger 28 дней назад
As an narcissist i hate spending money on food. And i have a lot of cash. I would also Steal food if that would be easy.
@patriciagorn6645
@patriciagorn6645 4 месяца назад
Its like living in hell being with one of them 😢
@hannahb3854
@hannahb3854 4 месяца назад
Stay strong, I know how you feel ❤
@ancusEIRL
@ancusEIRL 4 месяца назад
As a software dev i just want to buy small place in the countryside and harvest my own food. We do nothing relevant for reality.
@Victoria-qc9vw
@Victoria-qc9vw 4 месяца назад
Fuck yeah. I'm looking north of Russia, and you?
@thedevilandhertrumpets4268
@thedevilandhertrumpets4268 4 месяца назад
Thank you for acknowledging that.
@ancusEIRL
@ancusEIRL 4 месяца назад
@@teriekwilliams2828 that isna really good question. Maybe by the time i am able to afford such fantasy the countryide will be completeltly machine based. I've been dreaming about it since i worked at verizon around 8 yeara ago.
@ancusEIRL
@ancusEIRL 4 месяца назад
@@Victoria-qc9vw i've considered Constanza. It is in the north of Dominican Rep. Good weather for vegetables to grow, it is around 14⁰ C most of the year. And it is cheap. Two hours driving and you get 27⁰ - 32⁰ C in Puerto plata.
@ancusEIRL
@ancusEIRL 4 месяца назад
@@thedevilandhertrumpets4268i've been in telecom, finances and airline services and mos of the work can be done with 25%. Same as in twitter/X the rest is just business crazyness. You end up asking : i deliver but am i really adding value to the human race ?
@joannavlachou4520
@joannavlachou4520 4 месяца назад
I don"t know if Dr. Sam Vaknin.refers to politicians, but the Narcs i know that have thrived , are really hard workers, not neccessarily smart but they work really hard because they don t care for anything/anybody else and they get excited by antagonism...they spend most of their time in working and obtaining their goals.
@suzanneadey3448
@suzanneadey3448 4 месяца назад
This is phenomenal. Totally fascinating. Thank you so much.
@TheOakOx
@TheOakOx 4 месяца назад
This lecture could've saved the world. This is the greatest teaching of our time. I would've hoped spirituality could be explained scientifically so we could receive some hope as well. Waking up and grounding yourself in reality is like observing a nightmare and the natural defense is to dive right back in because the truth is grim. You can't defeat the cat and the grin with a smile, if you try you become the victim.
@tonyperez2830
@tonyperez2830 4 месяца назад
Epic speech! That created a shift in consciousness in me. Thank you!
@user-pv1dg3vs3m
@user-pv1dg3vs3m 4 месяца назад
Wow. That was a good one. My brain is buzzing and bent. I'm was surprised to here about the 17 percent, that's pretty wild.
@user-xp4rp1ok9z
@user-xp4rp1ok9z 4 месяца назад
Thank you Professor! That is really it! What a brilliant explanation of these days!
@agesflow6815
@agesflow6815 4 месяца назад
Thank you, Prof. Sam Vaknin.
@user-vi3sz3fg2r
@user-vi3sz3fg2r 4 месяца назад
Incredible. Dr. Vaknin, you are the best, best, best.
@jvnd2785
@jvnd2785 4 месяца назад
What an amazing way to look at the world. Thank you so much, Prof. Vaknin.
@bitchnutzmcgee5895
@bitchnutzmcgee5895 4 месяца назад
Good video. Depressed the hell out of me though.
@freewoman
@freewoman 4 месяца назад
Why? Are you still with one? Make a plan and get out! Divorcing mine right now. This video really hit home for me!
@freewoman
@freewoman 4 месяца назад
@@teriekwilliams2828 huh? How did you get that? 🤣
@doloresfer
@doloresfer 4 месяца назад
​@@teriekwilliams2828this video appears to dsy only narciscist can be successful.. Not true.. Normal persons can be successful in money or career without cheating and lying, and thats the only thing narcisist do to achieve success..
@bocekschmitt7838
@bocekschmitt7838 4 месяца назад
Vielen Dank, Professor Vaknin, bemerkenswerte und hervorragende Erklärung für so vieles 😻
@Rys12.3-4_5
@Rys12.3-4_5 4 месяца назад
Thank you 😍 Narcissists are Successful by obtaining money and power . Narcissist is good but without hurting people .
@doloresfer
@doloresfer 4 месяца назад
Nascicist are never good because they always hurt people... This video is a romantizied view of narcisists
@cristianmihai4818
@cristianmihai4818 4 месяца назад
this should be learned in schools....
@dquang1998
@dquang1998 4 месяца назад
Pls make more videos on this, we really need to hear more about this topic 😮
@belindared3389
@belindared3389 4 месяца назад
Great explanation 😂❤
@JonCurrie
@JonCurrie 4 месяца назад
May the force be with you in these neocon feudal economic reality times.
@Mountlougallops
@Mountlougallops 4 месяца назад
Thaks Sam
@MIRNA_LIZ
@MIRNA_LIZ 4 месяца назад
A M A Z I N G 🎉🎉🎉
@TakeTheWorldBackFromWallStreet
@TakeTheWorldBackFromWallStreet 4 месяца назад
MadTV did a virtual reality helmet bit named "Habitat 2000" that is relevant today
@yanakhalina-stackpole4710
@yanakhalina-stackpole4710 4 месяца назад
Wow
@raynoobkac
@raynoobkac 4 месяца назад
Thank you very much for the great lecture Mr. Vaknin.I cant wait for the day when we all turn ourselves into narcissistic zombie cyborgs,for example like The Borg from Star Trek🤣
@cecillekinnear4585
@cecillekinnear4585 4 месяца назад
Im an artist. My mother a well known author. I completely get your lecture. Art is the wandering mind fluttering through disembodied images. Im married to an engineer who did pioneering work in optical fibre.
@startingovaries
@startingovaries 4 месяца назад
My ex narco.path is a multi millionaire and says he's dying now but no one believes him. He's such a Liar.
@aspherical7658
@aspherical7658 2 месяца назад
I'm convinced. Where do I sign up for narcissist training classes?
@jacobshorter7204
@jacobshorter7204 4 месяца назад
My hyper-vigilance @ 00:26:03 👀
@MaryThompson63
@MaryThompson63 4 месяца назад
What an interesting model for thinking about these things! How does it apply to a covert narcissist who isn't successful in the world?
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 4 месяца назад
S/he is successful at undermining, plagiarizing, sabotaging, and destroying.
@pqt112
@pqt112 4 месяца назад
The ones I know are skilled at being victims. Faking illnesses, provoking people into mistreating them to claim victimhood and get attention, etc. They can really put you in jeopardy by changing people's perception of you and perception is reality....
@patriciavandevelde5469
@patriciavandevelde5469 4 месяца назад
Don t marry, stay solos!
@psychonauticum
@psychonauticum 4 месяца назад
After surviving narc abuse and spending 3+ years rebuilding myself, yeah I admit I'm afraid to be with ANYONE else. I REALLY like having a "me".
@chereeB-hummingbird
@chereeB-hummingbird 4 месяца назад
Amen ✨️
@psychonauticum
@psychonauticum 4 месяца назад
Listening to Sam def helped me along. Learned so much from this man so I still watch just cause he's quite fascinating.
@pitinicori
@pitinicori 4 месяца назад
Every emperor and tyrant in the world was a charming narc
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 4 месяца назад
Psychopathic narcissist.
@pitinicori
@pitinicori 4 месяца назад
@@samvaknin alright well if these psycho narcs are leading society like symbolic sheep to live in outer space with their digital coins, I’ll stay alone tending to the earth, a complete disgruntled so called “failure.” Even my degree can be used a doormat.
@pqt112
@pqt112 4 месяца назад
So many African dictators were nutcases
@SMILEY.45
@SMILEY.45 4 месяца назад
"I know what you’re afraid of. It’s not pain, or solitude. It’s indignity you can’t stand, Hannibal. You’re like a cat that way." - Alanna Bloom to Hannibal Lecter
@theIIkeyIIIgenerator
@theIIkeyIIIgenerator 4 месяца назад
Iam Back sry For the Long Time never forget your gang
@Oliversamuels60
@Oliversamuels60 4 месяца назад
Hi Sam When you are at the point where your mind is colonised, would it be a good solution to try and strengthen your own brain wave patterns or outsource your own self perception to someone who is more grounded in reality until you feel comfortable enough within reality to strengthen your own brain waves and trust your own perceptions
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 4 месяца назад
No. But therapy with the right therapist helps.
@janfinale2039
@janfinale2039 4 месяца назад
Funny...... just discovered this clip, & Alice In Wonderland is presently performing on stage (ballet) in Sydney
@101AGAMES
@101AGAMES Месяц назад
can I fake being a narcissist?
@thelau61
@thelau61 4 месяца назад
Well there you go, if you want to be successful, become a narcissist.
@pqt112
@pqt112 4 месяца назад
I wanted to say, you can just cosplay as one, but at some point you will get lost in the sauce. I am challenged everyday at my job by delulu people expecting me to go along with their delusions. It can feel like drowning
@roxanakh2094
@roxanakh2094 4 месяца назад
Professor Vaknin, you used the term " Manipulation of symbols in fantastic spaces." Can you please explain how you came up with this term? you explained to some degree, but does this have a philosophical background? If you did make this term, can you discuss this more in a video? and if you borrowed it, can you give references for further reading regarding the term, not specifically narcissism. Thank you.
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 4 месяца назад
I coined this phrase a few years ago.
@user-dr8sc1gp4z
@user-dr8sc1gp4z 4 месяца назад
Sounds like American politics
@19cerni91
@19cerni91 4 месяца назад
This fits so well with revelations books from bible.
@ngatiarihi8502
@ngatiarihi8502 4 месяца назад
First time Ive hears of this man, as an Israeli business man he has borrowed much from psychoanalysis. The ‘false self’ adaptation, concept or theory or the ‘true self’ derives from DW.Winnicott, our internal ‘object relations’ or an apparent lack of them , the empty self etc. On a global scale we are seeing a rise in forms of narcissism in many westernised capitalist groups from the leaders to the IT oligarchs etc. I like how he links the phenomena with the economy, the post modern or neo-liberal fantasies since about 1990. And how he has looked at his own personality traits and recovery. An eclectic thinker and perhaps influencer on the avoidance of reality or suffering and whom the fantasies of omnipotence serves, social media and otherwise.
@alicia2111
@alicia2111 3 месяца назад
"promosm"
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 3 месяца назад
What is promosm?
@samvaknin
@samvaknin 3 месяца назад
What is it?
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