TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Intro 01:02 The dreaded pregnancy scare 02:30 Just don't want parental responsibilities 03:58 What if I did want to be a dad... 05:38 This wouldn't make me a good mom 06:37 Kids aren't worth it 07:18 Child discipline 07:58 When you haven't found a partner 09:18 Life is half over!/Feeling a void 11:53 Why bring a child into this crazy world 14:25 The chances of having kids in your 40's
You nail it when you say that many men just get someone pregnant and then keep wandering around. I feel that the fact that being a present father is just regarded as ONE option for many men makes it so much easier for men to say they want kids. It's like they can try out if they like being a parent and if not, they just leave. Women's lives change completely from the moment they try to get pregnant and usually they are the ones being stuck with the kids if the partner leaves. I am single and I really hope to find a truly childfree man. I feel like many men I meet have a romaticized image of what being a parent would be like which is why they want that.
Timothy actually verbalizes my thoughts. My parents never pressured me to have kids but after ONE convo with them, one day, I DEFINITELY KNEW that they would have my carefree a$$ thrown into parenthood if they had their way. The fact that I don't have the desire to have kids is UNFATHOMABLE to them.
I'm an introvert and can confirm that you are right: it is easier or maybe more natural for extrovert parents to constantly be around someone. I enjoy company, too, but in small portions 🙂 I have a friend who is an extrovert. She has two kids and totally enjoys it. When I was at my 3-year old nephew's birthday party, I got home so exhausted!
At the end, when you said "No matter what a parent does, the child is gonna go through hard times", that is one of the arguments for Antinatalism. It's about preventing the guaranteed suffering of life. I don't think that many parents even consider that, so thanks for touching on it. Great video and I love your laugh :)
As a single Mom of 3, I'm really interested in your views on this! I've been watching your channel for a couple years and I gotta say, I really respect you (and some of the ppl you react to). After dealing with some of the situations in my life (my children not having a father figure in their lives, one child with disabilities, myself with disabilities) I did NOT sign up for this life and it really is unfair to my kids that they have this life also. I thought I was going into this with a partner. I also was not disabled at the time I started having kids. I feel bad for giving them this life and I can really respect someone who chooses to not have kids. Looking back, I wish I would have taken the time to really think about some major decisions in my life. I had my first when I was a late teen & had my youngest when I was in my early thirties. There is definitely a shift in how you parent when having kids at different stages in life. I wish I would have waited, wish I would have picked better partners, wish I took care of my body better.. So many things. I love your channel and I think you are an amazing person. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing this. It takes a lot of introspection to admit to ourselves that we haven't always thought out decisions. Most of us can admit to that, even if it isn't about having kids. Life's circumstances can take us in directions we didn't see coming and I'm sorry you haven't been able to raise your kids with a supportive partner. I'm so happy that you find my videos interesting as a parent. The world would be a better place if parents and childfree were more supportive of each other's choices. Have an amazing rest of your day and thank you for your kind words. 😀
Could you please explain what do you mean by "I did not sign up for this life"? Its just that it's three children and then you go off to say you chose not to wait, chose the partner you chose, chose not to take care of your body better, and even say you wish for children. To me, it all indicates you chose to have children.
@@vdg5346 I did choose to have my children. What I meant by I did not sign up for this life, was just that I got married really young and had 2 of my children early in life. I thought I was going to share the parenting responsibilities with another adult, but it didn't work out that way. My youngest was the product of... An abusive situation.. But again, I chose to keep her and, don't get me wrong, I do love my children. They are my life! I just mean it's hard to raise 3 on my own with added disabilities. I wish I would have waited.. At least then I might have chosen a better partner. I might have better understanding of certain circumstances that may arise, if I wasn't so young. I hope that answers your question. 😊
@@sarahwolff8211 we love hearing these stories from parents here and I thank you for sharing your story, but full honesty, I don't know what makes people think that choosing motherhood will immediately mean you get to be the author of your own little fairy tale. If anything, once you have children you have no autonomy, no power of decision, you do not own your time, money or future. So the fact that you decided to go that path THREE times baffles me! And of course you love your children and they are your life. Thats what all parents say. That's what humans say when they have to accept something they can't change.
@@phantomvampyressshadowkiss4690 " There are some that are not so nice". That goes for everybody. On another channel you said " I always knew there was something wrong with you people ". If you think we're wrong go and talk on a different subject. We never said all parents regret having kids. A lot of kids regret their parents too. You're fascinated by us that's what it is.
This guy should do stand up!! He has definitely had some deep thought moments. The pregnancy scares didn't freak him out to bad!!! Very hilarious!!! Hannah, I am in my 50s and it is overwhelming to think do I have 50 more years? Ahahah. Great video!!!
There are so many aspects in life that a person maintains. Relationships with your parents, Relationship with your body, Relationship with your duties, Relationship with your passions, Relationship with your friends, Relationship with your children. The likelihood is high that we would be mediocre, if not deficient, in at least one of these relationships.
I became c h i l d free at around.......... Age 13. I just looked at the way most d a d s live their life and I knew that wasn't for me. All around me we're d a d s who had to work 50-60 hours a week to car for a family and on top of that do lawn care and home repairs around the house on weekends. I saw f a t h e r hood as s l a v e r y.
@JollyCakes 🎂🍉 also, when you really think about it, Parenthood would be a struggle for something non-essential. You can't survive without food, you can't survive without oxygen, you can't survive without water. It's very hard to survive without reliable transportation or shelter but having offsprings make your life harder with no incentive. The money you would spend on them cost far more than the money you will need for assisted living. So having someone to care for you an old age is not a good enough reason. "Legacy" is created by the difference you make not the offsprings you make. I can go on and on. Parenthood is nothing more than non-essential, unnecessary suffering
Great video! I love timothy ward, subscribed to his channel quite recently and he makes so much sense in the things he says, very self-aware and intelligent guy!
Where do you shop Hannah? Your tops are always so flattering! Im a smaller woman, and in Canada too and I feel like I can find teen clothes, or old lady clothes, but I havent been able to find my "adult" look lol!
You are so kind...Finding my adult look is always a work in progress. I got that top at RW&CO. Ricki's, H&M, and The Bay sometimes have stuff. Honestly, its such a hit and miss for me most of the time. I'm always looking around at different places.
I'm a 24 year old man. All my siblings have kids, and they always ask me when I will have kids? I tell them never. My family was kinda disappointed but at the same time. I don't think everyone is meant to have kids
Thank you for this content, I am also childfree. In regard to feeling bad if the child suffers, I don’t really agree with that. I don’t believe it would be the parents fault if bad things happened to the child. Life as a general rule is hard and moments of happiness are few and far between. As humans, that’s the way we learn to not make the same mistakes. There has to be suffering on some level, since we are not perfect and life definitely is not perfect. It’s unrealistic to say I don’t want to have children because I don’t want them to suffer.
"Not having a child so they won't experience suffering" is a reason I hear quite frequently from people that decide not to have kids. It's true that no one can prevent someone from experiencing the difficulties of life. Some people have gone through incredibly traumatic things in life so maybe that holds them back.
While agree with this for the most part, I do think that whatever a child goes through, how they suffer in life kinda does fall back on the fact that those things absolutely wouldn’t have happened had the parents not forced them into existence. There really is no getting around that.
Also. I know EXACTLY what kind of world I’d be forcing my kid into, the challenges they WILL have just being black for example and that just doesn’t sit well with me. There is no way in hell I’d be able to live with myself because I can’t guarantee their happiness and fulfillment. It’s a game of craps in that regard and so it’s certainly not worth the risk!!!
Any reason is a reason to not have kids. What are you talking about lol. No matter how crazy the reason, people who don't want kids shouldn't have kids no matter what the reason is
When he said he started doing more so he wouldn't have kids. Maybe some young people don't think about it much. Or have kids with out thinking about it
That puts the concept of "The Original Sin" in a different light, being that The Original Sin is not copulation, but rather, procreation. The fact that YOU created new life which will experience joy and pain, and YOU are responsible for subjecting it to both of these states. You came to exist without your consent. You lose your status of being innocent once you choose to put someone else through this. *This is just a thought experiment. I'm not judging anyone.*
this is a great channel. I love that this channel exists! so my wife and I have decided to not have children and my boomer parents just don't get it. my wife has medical issues AND for me personally I enjoy my life tremendously the way it is I dont want it to change AND I don't want to devote all my time and energy into something I don't enjoy (babies and toddlers). Also I would say getting married is a scam. milenials and z DONT DO IT. a good cost of wedding=28000 and in divorce court the man loses everything. don't go into debt for 1 day and don't put yourself in that kind of situation. just live together you won't pay as much taxes either. God Bless. 😀
@@WifeWithoutKids your content just helps me stay positive and literally serves as a reminder and refuge from the societal pressure to have kids. keep doing what your doing! IT HELPS ALOT!
Like they say young and dumb if that man had got with the right person. When he was was 21 or 24. Or if he had got with a partner who wanted kids not him. I think he probably would of had kids with out realizing he didn't want kids. If not him when they was very young. Some people probably would of had kids with out realizing they didn't want them. If the right person came a long or if they was with a partner who wanted kids not them. I don't know if this is more common in very young people. But some people might not think about the downs about having kids
I absolutely L💖VED the video! 🥰💖☺️😊💕✨💕😊☺️ I thought it was very interesting and informative! I L💖VE how U R also sharing a males perspective on the childfree life! (I know U have also made videos sharing males opinions on it before & I really liked those videos 2!) Btw when U mentioned how U wonder how introverts handle parenting when they need alone time, I just wanted to say I think about that 2 all the time lol! 😬🤭 I h💕pe 2 be a mom one day (just looking 4 my Prince Charming lol!) and if I am going 2 be real honest this is something I already know that will be a struggle when I become a mom lol! I am an introvert and an only child, that’s probably why I am introverted lol! I grew up pretty lonely... though U know U get used 2 it and I do enjoy my alone time at times lol! I have now found a bit of alone time a necessity though lol! and as much as I do enjoy hanging out with ppl and want 2 have my own family & all that I already know it will be a HUGE adjustment lol! Cause they are not friends (ok that’s not necessarily true lol! of course U can still be friends in a way with UR family) but what I mean 2 say is they basically don’t go h💕me cause well they are h💕me lol! So yeah... I guess all U can do as an introverted parent (which I plan 2 do cause I do worry about it) is try 2 work it out with UR partner & just tell him U need some “me time” lol! U know some time without UR partner, pets or children for at least an hour... and just tell UR partner while UR doing UR own thing 2 please just spend some time with them U know watch TV, chat with them, play a game, pitch in with household chores together U know perhaps get started on some laundry together lol!... I guess just try 2 have UR partner spend some quality time with the kids and pets while U do U lol! And also I guess just h💕pe that UR partner is extroverted lol! Or I mean I suppose U could always ask a friend or UR own parents 2 spend some time with them lol! 🥰💖💕☺️✨😊✨🥰💖💕☺️
Good video. I'm a fan of Timothy Ward. Feel the same exact way. By the way 40 is middle aged in the western culture... The body is actually designed to live to 120 at least. So you may not hit middle age until 60 Young lady.
Oh, I remember this man's youtube channel and his testimony about being childfree................................................. relaxing in my hammock this afternoon.
Not sure if you'll see this or not but I'm curious. You live in Canada yeah? I'm in the States and was thinking of maybe moving to Canada some day but while I was doing research on it they say it's easier to have families in Canada and easier to be single in the States. So my question is is it hard to be childfree in Canada? Sounds kinda dumb asking out loud but yeah I'm curious lol
Yes, I live in Canada, although I've lived in both counties. It probably depends a lot on the State or Province that you live in as they can have different vibes. I don't feel that it's particularly hard to be childfree in Canada. A lot of people don't understand this choice, but I have a lot of American views on this channel who say the same thing so not sure that there's a big difference. Overall Canada tends to have a higher cost of living than the US so that might be a downside.
But yeah, there is more pressure for a woman to be responsible for her offspring. Which would explain why some women decide to abandon their children rather than put them up for adoption after birth. No one really talks about guilting a person out of adoption.
Would love to see a video where you watch videos on why people love having kids,chose to be parents and do NOT regret that decision as I feel watching you watch a video of someone basically with the same ideals and opinions that you have almost feels like you’re finding other people with the same views to confirm you’re right and have made the right choice to be childless. Where as if you watched a video with an opposing view it would be a more interesting dynamic. I have 4 children and I am happy with the choices I have made in my life. However I wouldn’t create content solely based on why I have chosen to have children and the benefits of it as I think most people understand the benefits of having children so would be almost teaching them to suck eggs. I personally don’t think choosing NOT to have children is a new zany idea and life choice,I know quite a few people who have opted not to have children for many of the same reasons you and this guy mention. Personally I don’t think you ever really know wether you’d be happy childless or with children until you have them,every child is different and I honestly think children can change people in many different ways. When you love your children you go above and beyond for them because you love them and want too not just because you should. My husband and I are happy to take on the extra responsibilities required for parenting because we love and enjoy our children and until someone has their own children they don’t know what that journey would be like for them and how it would make them feel. There is something very special about seeing your child you’ve carried for the first time and yes sometimes people are filled with negative feelings but I suspect the majority of people feel the positive emotions linked to this life changing event. It’s ok to want children and it’s ok to not want children. However in my lifetime I have met more people unhappy with not being able to have children or regret not having them than people happily childless by choice. I hope you remain happy with your choice into your years and if you decide later on in life to change your mind (which is also perfectly normal) you have a joy filled pregnancy and enjoy parenthood. Love from the UK 🇬🇧 ❤️
Thanks for your thoughts and feedback. It's great to hear when parents are happy with their choice to have kids even with the challenges that can come along with being a parent. I've never had a desire to be a parent and it's something I've given a lot of thought to. I've been around kids my whole life and that has never changed my mind. I'm content and fulfilled in my life so I know that childfree is the right choice for me. I did a react to a family of 10 here: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-MNVaxGg5x-k.html It was interesting to see the dynamics in their family. I may do more of these reactions in the future. If you have a specific video you'd like me to react to please feel free to send it my way. There are so many supportive groups for moms out there, yet the childfree choice is generally regarded as negative and people don't feel like they can even talk about not wanting kids without getting a lot of judgmental feedback. I made the choice to create a supportive and encouraging community/channel for people who have made the choice to live a childfree life. It's been so encouraging to be able to see childfree people connect with other and be open about some of the challenges they have faced. I think it's important for childfree people to have places of community where they can be supported, connect with like minded people and understand that they are not alone in their choice.
Seems you're conflating childless with childfree. They're not thr same just FYI and indeed channels solely focused on not having kids is needed. You go try asking a doctor to sterilize you and you'll see they'll treat you like you're crazy even having had a couple kids. They'll do everything they can to convince you you'll regret not having kids. This world still favors parents.
@@WifeWithoutKids thank you for your response,I was recommended your channel by RU-vid and I hopped in to check it out. I really appreciate your dignified response to mine and thank you for not taking my comment as an attack of any sort as it really wasn’t. I commend you for making a space for women who make this choice to have some representation in the media space. All the best from the UK 🇬🇧 Dani X
"You don't know if you'll be happy or not until you have them." That's the point. Why would anyone gamble with the possibility? Kids are human beings, not things I can dispose of if I regret having them. I don't want to "deal with it" that's why I don't have them. Even with my pet, I don't feel like adopting more animals, because that's a huge commitment, let alone human kids. I grew up with my little brothers and cousins and I couldn't stand that kind of life. Rather have a simple peaceful life without them.
Hannah, are your eyes green? Mine are green too... That is the rarest eye colour out there. If we behave like that, there will be no green eyes left... Cheers!
I don't think you have watched many of Tim's videos. It is stuck in stone that Tim do not want to get married or have any offsprings. If you look through his videos you will see a few videos where Tim talks about this
@@vdg5346 lol. You should read this book call the manipulated m a n. That will tell you everything you need to know about why m e n do what they do once they reach older age.
"you have to be the mom and the dad" no Hanna. Not every family is built under the concept of two-genders. And also no, for some it is easier to make decisions solo, so it might be easier to be a single parent. I love your channel but i am SO disappointed to have heard something so narrow minded from you.
Yeah I get that families *can* look different. But when people are discussing somthing in general, we are going to make GENERAL statements which are made up of the "norm" that represents the largest number of people. And what has been the norm for thousands of years. It is logically impossible to ever say something that everyone can agree with or say somthing that represents everyone. The best we can all do when speaking to an audience is provide rhetoric that pertains to the largest number of people.
@@avacadotoast5492 That would certainly make sense except that this community is about a minority that challenges conventional social norms, so why would we, out of all social groups, comply with those "norms" if they are pertinent to our conversation simply due to the fact that they are direct in opposition to our own lifestyles choices? Also, inclusion and diversity have been ongoing topics since the late 80s now. Let's stop pretending it's new when for over 40 years now same-sex couples and gender non conforming people have been able to adopt. Hanna's audience is very diverse. We see almost a 50/50 parents/CF people and within the two, there are plenty of LGBTQ viewers and single parents. Her comment was offensive.
