WWK REACTS: Childfree By Choice: Why I Don't Want Kids

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Today I'm reacting to another childfree by choice video. WHY I DON'T WANT KIDS is a video that explains why Bren has made the choice to live a childfree lifestyle.
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Intro
00:45 Unwanted feedback
05:23 Society is obsessed with motherhood
06:53 Should I leave bloopers in my videos?
07:23 Reasons people don't want kids
08:24 Why she doesn't want kids
09:50 Relationships change when you have kids
10:14 I go on a bit of a mini rant here, but this confuses me...
11:43 Pros of childfree life
13:30 What her Mom thinks of her decision
14:07 To parents
14:36 To childfree
15:20 To undecided
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#wifewithoutkids #childfree #childfreebychoice
In this reaction video I'm checking out childfree by choice: why I don't want kids. In this childfree video Bren explains why she has picked the childfree lifestyle and what not having kids means for her life. She discusses some of the common responses she gets when people find out she's kid free. She clears up misconceptions about childfree couples and gives some great advice to parents who regret having children.
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Опубликовано:

5 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 207

@Rachillion 3 года назад

I get so tired of people believing a baby will solve ALL of a woman’s problems.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

YES!

@idotgotitme3280 2 года назад

Yeah right, more like the cause of them.

@lbiparelli 3 года назад

Having kids so they’ll take care of you when you’re old IS selfish, not not having them.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It's definitely not a good game plan!

@willeliagujetti8410 3 года назад

Yeah I can find someone who I can live all my hesitances to someone who wants to take care of me if I don’t have kids. I remember going to the hospital to see my bf’s grandmother and she’s like see how important it is to have kids... little does she know I had to convince my bf to go see her cuz he doesn’t care to go visit people in hospitals... life is sad when people don’t realize the truth.

@danagabriella6885 3 года назад

People don't realize that sometimes the reason CF individuals choose not to have kids is because of the traumas that they have experienced by their own parents growing up. That is what happened to me, so these are my years where I can learn to heal and work on making up for the childhood that I lost

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Such a good point. Wishing you well in your healing journey. 🌸

@SessKo 2 года назад

That is what it is for me too. I need to use this time and energy to reparent myself. My parents struggled to be parents because they had bad parents. I don't need to continue that cycle.

@thesweetestbear 2 года назад

me too!!

@albertkirtlandjr6735 Год назад

Awesome! This is great. All the best on your journey!

@autobotrock4789 3 года назад

I think the funniest thing about being CF is when someone says "You should have kids. You'd be a good mom." and you know that's BS. I'd be the kind of mom that gets visibly annoyed at their kid for having inconvenient needs or tell them to shut up when I'm not in the mood to parent. I get to lead the life that's good for me and not ruin someone's childhood. Don't call me selfish for planning my life according to my needs.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I feel like I probably wouldn't be the most patient parent myself!

@Aquariuswonder86 Год назад

Exactly. I don’t even have patience for myself sometimes

@annasame7395 3 года назад

Reasons why I personally don't want kids for myself as a 14 yr old: 1. I am not patient, and I would want to be a patient parent. 2. I like my space, and kids are 24/7 commitment. 3. I want to have a good career, and maternity leave is a must at early stages. 4. I want to go against the social norms of women being baby makers. 5. More time for working on relationship. 6. Less stress, I am already very stressed, and I am only at school, so with work and kids to come home to, my life would be so stressful. 9. I realized society made parenting seem glamorous, and not the daily moments. It's not as cool as it is portrayed. 10. We are overpopulated. We do not need more people on the planet. 11. I also don't want to bring a child into the world for them to essentially go to school for 13 years, and work until they retire, enjoy a decade or so and then die. 12. I am terrified of giving birth, periods are bad enough. 13. They are so expensive, I don't think I will be financially stable at all at any point to the extend I want to. 14. I don't want to be attached to a partner, I want to be able to leave a relationship if it is toxic. 15. I want a calm and chill lifestyle, and children don't seem to fit my plans, or seem that they would make me feel fulfilled. 16. I don't see why I would want to have a kid, when there are so many that I could adopt. 17. The role of looking after kids naturally falls on the mother, and I don't want that that responsibility. 18. I don't have the desire like I was once conditioned to have. 19. My mum sacrifices so much for me, her time, happiness, job and more, and she doesn't seem fullfilled.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

This is some incredibly insight! You've obviously already given this decision a lot of thought and that's very admirable. 🙌😃

@karinapflima 4 месяца назад

The role of looking after kids does not naturally fall on the mother. It is a social construct. Until humanity changes, I am really not interested in taking on this disproportionate workload as a woman.

@sistermadrigalmorning233 3 года назад

I have kids, I wanted kids-- I am completely and totally fine with you not wanting kids. Society is judgey and stupid. I have two kids, a girl and a boy, and when in the hospital after my son was born the nurse said "perfect! You're done!" And I was so peeved. Like who are you to advise me if I shouldn't have more kids if I want?! In free societies where people choose to have as many kids as they want, it seems like people roughly end up having 1.5 kids-- so if I end up having 4 kids (which is what I want, though I may adopt one or two) and several of you have zero kids, we average out! If you have zero kids, they judge you saying you'll want them. If you have one kid, they'll tell you that kid needs a sibling. If you have two kids and they're a boy and girl they'll judge you if you want more. If you have two of the same gender, they'll urge you to try again for the other gender. If you have three kids, people start saying you're selfish and lecture you on overpopulation. If you have 4 or more, they make Duggar jokes. Basically society is judgey at every level when it comes to procreation, and regardless of if we want kids or not we should push back on that.

@veekay6142 3 года назад

I like this comment

@l.v.5542 3 года назад

Childfree people should be celebrated instead of put down.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

YES!

@mo.ka.9661 3 года назад

Celebrated for what?

@minajan4316 3 года назад

@@mo.ka.9661 Celebrated for not having kids 🤷‍♀️ just like people celebrate when people have kids 🙄

@mo.ka.9661 3 года назад

@@minajan4316 Having kids is an accomplishment, why would you be celebrated for NOT doing something? Participation trophies are stupid.

@minajan4316 3 года назад

@@mo.ka.9661 Having kids is no accomplishment 🙄 getting a career and making money and having a good life is accomplishment if you want to have 10 kids or even have that's your accomplishment don't mean everyone has to follow 🤦‍♀️🥱🙄

@kandhc 3 года назад

My issue is with having no kids and no pets….I just don’t want either. I want no responsibility and people shame me constantly! Thanks for this video! ❤️

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

There's nothing wrong with not wanting either. It's your life so your choice. 😀

@suebotchie4167 2 года назад

No kids, no pets either.

@suebotchie4167 2 года назад

No kids, no pets

@andreacannon1263 2 года назад

I think the same way...I'm a wife and that is enough responsibility for me!

@suebotchie4167 2 года назад

Pets just create more housework.

@sparklingcherry8 3 года назад

Pregnancy is not appealing to me, I might want to raise one if I didn’t have to give birth but i just don’t know if I can balance work, house chores and a child, while making enough money to support myself, things I love to do and also make time to care for a child, especially in their younger years and deal with their tantrums, I think having a dog is a lot more comforting and mentally healthy for me

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I'm all about the pets as well. 😺

@sala945 3 года назад

Wow, I have the Same Impression. Pregnancy ist scary for me and Then also the time and efforr you have to give... I See my sister, she is the sweetest mother in earth and really doing a good Job she hast so much Patience. And my bephew ist so sweet and actually chill - however He is still a child WHO needs Attention, Love, time... She has No Time for herself and her Dreams...

@mexicanaenchina 2 года назад

Same here!

@shleegar 3 года назад

My dad is disappointed that I am not having children. I have been happily married for 12 years, but we still get occasional passive aggressive digs. My brother recently got married, and my dad's toast to them was 'have a happy marriage and lots of grandchildren'. Way to pressure the newly weds, let them be happy.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Oh yikes. Those toasts are always so uncomfortable!

@issac2939 8 месяцев назад

Is he religious?

@shikb 3 года назад

The fact that some people should not be a parent cannot be a complex ideal. Because we alI know of parents who should’ve never become parent.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Unfortunately that does happen.

@larrybell1859 3 года назад

Right on target! Disney should make a movie about a heterosexual married couple who chose to be childfree.

@aquamarinedream8304 3 года назад

I considered being CF for awhile so I'm very interested in the lifestyle, but some online cf places are very negative towards parents. I'm so glad your channel is open & accepting I think it's a healthier dynamic to have. I appreciate it. 😄

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you. I have no interest in being negative towards parents or kids. We each get to decide what fits us best while still respecting that other people will make a decision that is completely different than ours.

@maddiebrown6515 3 года назад

The neglectful parent thing is so true. I saw this for years working as a camp counselor and a nanny for years. It’s what helped me come to my decision to be childfree. I think so maybe forget that a baby turns into a child, turns into an adult - all the same amount human. I’ve seen to many parents use their child almost as like a new fun item to pull along. It’s heart breaking. Thanks for the post!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

That is very heartbreaking to see happen. I think kids can sense when they aren't really wanted or cared for.

@mauiwowielmsv 2 года назад

That’s why people should start saying they’re giving birth to a human! They forget that their baby is a human being not a trend #2under2 (do people have two babies just for this hashtag?)

@Aquariuswonder86 Год назад

@@mauiwowielmsv I hope not. That sounds like a nightmare if their trying to use the hashtag smh

@skylinefever Год назад

It makes me think of the various stories from r/raisedbynarcissists. Such people might as well have said they want a meat puppet they can dress up. Once a child has the ability to think their own thoughts, narcissistic parents lose their shit.

@kikic7637 3 года назад

I have a friend with 2 small kids, and watching her with the kids keeps me child free. Motherhood is overrated. I enjoy being the fun Auntie...because when the fun is over I get return them back to her.😊

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Well said!

@Giesselle16 3 года назад

I love my mom with all my heart and I appreciate all the sacrifices she made to raise me, but I do not want kids and she understands my decision.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It's amazing to have a supportive Mom!

@motherhoodsbeauty9279 2 года назад

My big sister always guilt trip me when I didn’t do something she ask me to. She would be like “I take care of you when you were kids so now you have to do what I tell you”. She is not even that old, she’s only 35. She feel entitled to me doing stuff for her. And I am not even her kid.

@MemoryChronicles 3 года назад

My husband and I are CF! We love it! And you couldn’t pay me a million bucks to have kids 😁 never wanted em’ I just knew from a young age that I never wanted to be a mother 🤷🏽‍♀️

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes! 🙌

@sarahboston923 3 года назад

My mother in law had her kids so that they will take care of her. She treated her kids like slaves and guilt tripped them throughout their lives. I am happy my spouse broke away from her and the toxic family based on EXTREME narcassim and co-dependancy. She want us to have kids so that they could help out and use as a trophy. Absolute monster and psychic vampire. As always, I enjoyed this very much, keep up the good work girl! Ty for having this channel to support the childfree life style!🙏🏻😊💚💚💚

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you for supporting the channel.

@minajan4316 3 года назад

My goal in life is to get my nursing license.. Period.. No regrets 🙏🏼. I worked at a dementia department and knew one of the residents there had 10 grown children and they will visit when they felt like it and me and coworkers asked each other wow 10 kids and not one can take care of her at their house? 🙄 talk about selfish 🤦‍♀️

@LT-et5rr 2 года назад

It’s not selfish to not want to care for an elderly parent/ family member. I helped my mom with my elderly aunt with dementia for three long years. It was brutal. She became violent, she would walk out her house in the middle of the night and would have to have the cops hunt her down. She would poop her pants and hide her dirty under around the house and we’d have to look for the awful smell. Not everyone can handle taking care of the elderly . Especially if they are sick. That’s why we pay people who specialize in that area.

@aquamarinedream8304 3 года назад

I have one child less than one year old & I love her but it's so much work. I considered being CF for a few years... I think my daughter is worth the suffering, I'm glad I had at least 1 child for the experience & relationship, but let it be known that there is indeed suffering. I'm less happy than I was before I had her. Having 2 kids looks like the ideal family in my head but honestly I'm not sure if I want to do this again, I have to sacrifice so much of myself. Even for parents, after having 1 child there's pressure to have more! As for my partner, he's definitely not on the backburner! We have much less time for each other & that's a real struggle, but he & my daughter are both a priority. Thinking about how much our relationship would suffer if we had another is one reason why I might stop at 1.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you so much for sharing this realness! I imagine the balancing act of being a mom and wife can be very difficult. 💜

@MrsNicolas 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids I'll piggyback off this post. My situation is a little different. I'm single mom and currently dating a single father. We both dated each other in high school ( we're both in our early 30's). You are definitely right about the balancing act of partner and children. I think many people don't realize how crucial it is to balance both relationships. As a few have mentioned, it has been the cause of divorce for certain people. They neglect their spouse, instead of balancing, which results in arguments cheating or divorce. Some will stay together for the children's sake. I've even seen where couple will stay in separate bedrooms, but live under the same roof for the children sake. I tell childless kids several different things. One of them is if they're not ready to balance talking care of themselves, the children, and they're partner, then don't get married or have children.

@candy11401 2 года назад

Thank you for typing these posts, it's good to hear these experiences and I think more truthfulness should be taught to people so they can make a more informed choice

@powderandpaint14 Год назад

The fact that you are less happy than you were before having a child is very telling, and a lot of people will not admit that that is their situation. Definitely don't have another one if you don't really want to!

@maholidaylife381 3 года назад

I work with kids but don't want my own. I think working with kids made me realize how hard it is raising them and put me off lol! I'm very happy to hand them back at the end of the day, and go home to my partner and enjoy some peace and quiet xx

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I totally agree. Spending time with kids is a good reality check for how much work actually goes into raising them.

@rach3511 3 года назад

People always pressure you to have kids. This only makes me want to do the opposite. It's not their body and relationships their ruining.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

There is a lot of pressure!

@aomoriemma 2 года назад

I appreciate you. Husband and I have been married 20 years this year. We didn’t want kids, and quite happy. When someone says we will have FOMO. I generally tell them I suffer from JOMO…joy of missing out. ;)

@WifeWithoutKids 2 года назад

That’s great, I love it!

@serafineargo1780 3 года назад

Okay I am still confused, why is it selfish to not have kids? Like it’s my choice right?

@autobotrock4789 3 года назад

Only hypocrites say that. Look at it this way. If you go to the pet store and buy a puppy, is it a selfless action? You have to take care of this puppy's every need and sometimes you have to sacrifice a few things so it's not neglected. But at the end of the day, why did you get the puppy? Most will say it's because they simply wanted a dog in their life. Not because it's for some good cause. People have kids for the same reason. We all base our life choices off our best interests. Being child free is no more selfish than having kids.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It is your choice. 😄

@Shane-ff2mm 3 года назад

I searched out this channel to try and understand why couples would choose a childfree lifestyle. I feel like I understand and respect people's feelings on the subject much better now. Just like I dont want to be judged for having children, I can give others the same respect.

@Just...Peachy Год назад

I think it's selfish to bring a life into this dumpster fire world we're living in. Just my opinion

@kamalelwa3505 3 года назад

Well let me say that I do not agree with putting ones spouse on the backburner to give 100% to a kid. That is like u used them as a sperm donor and are washing ur hands of them. I think u must always have a unified bond when child rearing...definitely takes 2 to make a baby and should be 2 to raise them. I do feel sorry for all the single parents trying to do it all, I can't even imagine their stress level!!! I am happily CF at 55 and married. My heart is also full.☺

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Single parents have it tough. I admire those who are working so hard to provide the best life they can for their children especially in circumstances that are not ideal.

@zanetawrightsell8527 3 года назад

If I could find a good man, I might consider having a child. So many men dump responsibilities n the work of household duties n child rearing on women while they live a carefree life. I REFUSE to live like that and be USED by ANY man!

@zanetawrightsell8527 3 года назад

Preach!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

In so many cases that's very true. Men tend to get off easy when it comes to raising kids and the majority of the responsibility seems to be the Mom's.

@idotgotitme3280 2 года назад

Tell me about it. 😩

@tnbsp 3 года назад

Im going to become a parent this fall. And i love your channel and everything you say lol, even though motherhood is always something I’ve wanted. I agree that the partner should be prioritize and I do think if the spouse is put on the back burner than it will be a recipe for disaster. Actually, my husband and I went to couples therapy for over six months prior to getting pregnant because we wanted our relationship to be in the best shape possible before beginning a family- this is for us and our marriage and for the well being of our future son

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Congratulations on your baby. I agree that therapy can be a great way to improve ourselves so that we can be a better partner. Good for you guys! 🌻

@gladysfernandez4654 3 года назад

My dad asked me these questions the first time I told him I wanted to be child free. He called me selfish and that I will miss out. But as time goes by, he sees how happy my husband and I are, he is now happy for us and supports our decision. I think some people are just so shocked about hearing how we want to be child free, that they make comments that can sometimes be hurtful. If they really try to understand our point of view, they will realize that we made a decision that is right for us.

@barbarajohnson3876 3 года назад

Getting neg feedback in the black community...they don't holdback. Then imagine being atheist, to boot. Happily married for 50 yrs. The best thing about getting old, childfree communities

@kathykay9920 3 года назад

Dear Hannah, The best part of the channel is the non judgemental way of deflecting the usual comments thrown at child free people. It's sometimes easy to get a bit annoyed on the inside but the best way to deal with it is a smile and a non loaded reply. At 57 I knew at 7 that I didn't want kids. I'm happily married to a man for 30 years, we have travelled the world love each others company. I'm saddened that by now younger folks like you are still challenged. However, your lovely chanel is normalising cf status. Good for you. 🌟

@criss1461 Год назад

I think the most frustrating thing is people constant expectations for child free people to have to explain themselves all the time and people not finding it weird to be so intrusive and demanding for people to explain their life and choice. If we normalised that,lets normalise also asking people " oh you having a child? Mine explaining in detail over and over again as to why? I don't understand why. Don't you think you're going to regret it? But you're so young to have kids!" and all the bs we're getting as people who don't want kids.

@candy11401 2 года назад

Amazing points being made in this video, I am also glad that you voice your own opinion

@albertkirtlandjr6735 Год назад

11:00. Absolutely! I lived with two parents who didn’t love each other. It was traumatic to me. I love the quote: “The most precious inheritance that parents can give their children is their own happiness.” Thich Nhat Hahn. I think it’s really true.

@WifeWithoutKids Год назад

That is a great quote.

@cosmiclifeist4875 3 года назад

I do plan to have kids, but I am totally support people who wish to not have children. I am only against imposing beliefs, which is something we unfortunately see often with overzealous parents or pessimistic antinatalists. I hope that you have a wonderful day and a blessed life!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you and have a wonderful weekend! 😃

@l.v.5542 3 года назад

Another good video Hannah. Yes, to bloopers! 😄

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you. 😃

@dano7802 3 года назад

great video and points made here thnx hanna

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Glad you enjoyed it.

@purpleviolet207 3 года назад

Great video Hannah! Great points have been made!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thanks.

@purpleviolet207 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids You're welcome

@ktrudy1 2 года назад

Why does she not have 100k subs?? I love this gal. Ty for all u do!♥️♥️♥️

@mumbai1119 3 года назад

Simply put Having children or NOT is none of other people's business IT IS UPTO THE COUPLE THEIR LIFE THEIR DECESION

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

This is true.

@NiinaSKlove 3 года назад

I got an interesting comment here the other day, regarding the childfree by choice topic. I was told by a person (not sure if it was a man or a woman, judging by the online name is was hard to tell) that within about ten years or so, I would start to *decay* (😂😂😂) since I had made the decision to not have kids. I did not know my own best interest, and I would basically let down society by not doing my duty as woman. I mean… decay?! 😂

@aliciamarie1081 3 года назад

Most women I see with no kids look great, you don’t realize how much stress it has on your body during pregnancy and after with all the work and sleepless nights. I’m convinced having kids makes you look older in long run.

@MemoryChronicles 3 года назад

There’s literally a study online on how CF people live long, healthy and stress free lives 😁 so I wouldn’t be too concerned with other people’s opinions! Sure I sometimes feel bad considering I have fully functioning female baby making components that I choose not to use them while some women out there would do anything to have children and cannot but hey 🤷🏽‍♀️ I don’t want em’ I don’t want em’

@idotgotitme3280 2 года назад

@@aliciamarie1081 I've said this in a post before about how I was in a line at the bank and started talking to the lady in front of me, and she mentioned she was 80, and I was blown away because it was the same age as my mom, but she looked like she was 20 years younger, and then I found out that she never had kids and I thought, oh, no wonder you look so much younger than my mom; you've never had to deal with the stress that kids cause, just live a happy carefree life, and she had been married 50 years as well. She said she told her husband that she didn't want kids, and he said, whatever you want. Boy I wish it was that easy for me. 😒

@bethanykennedy812 Год назад

Unpopular opinion that I hold: You don't owe your parents anything! They chose to have you and raise you. They owe it to you to make sure you're taken care of because they chose for you to exist. Or they chose to adopt you. You were their choice and not your own. They didn't do you some favor that now you must repay. They simply full-filled their duty to care for their child. If you do not want to do that, then not having kids is the right choice.

@jpgiles1725 3 года назад

My gf wants kids and I dont. Dated for a year. We just broke up a few days ago. It was hard, do you think I should have stayed with her and compromised with what she wanted? Or do you think in the long run it would have been a bad idea? You have any advise? Everyone is saying I have to have kids one day. Idk I didnt even know there was a childfree community

@maddiebrown6515 3 года назад

Not the OP here, but I think u did the right thing. If you compromised you may have become resentful later. Kids is a huge choice and every person male or female has the choice to become or not become a parent. I hope you are doing well, break ups a hard. I hope you find someone one day that wants the same as you :)

@jpgiles1725 3 года назад

@@maddiebrown6515 I really appreciated you taking time out of your day to respond to this. I'm the only person within my social circle that does not want kids. And everyone was telling me the classic oh but you will feel different when it's your own and you 2 make such a good couple and you might change your mind, so I started second guessing myself. Thank you very much for your input!

@Strongpoeticmind 3 года назад

You made the right choice; it's okay, your human. Your happiness should be a top priority in your life. You don't want to go back to your girlfriend have kids break up again, only for the system to favor her as the primary caregiver. Child support will hurt only you financially in the end, whether you're financially stable or not.

@minajan4316 3 года назад

Breakups are hard but you should have talked about it from the beginning and don't go back to her just to please her there's plenty of women out there who are childfree. Life goes on and if you have a kid not by choice you will be miserable. The choice is yours

@jpgiles1725 3 года назад

@@Strongpoeticmind thank you so much for responding to this. I really appreciate your input

@margaretwerncke5307 3 года назад

Just wanted to say I love your personality and videos. I have kids but all of my best friends are childfree by choice and I enjoy this channel a lot!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you so much!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Intro 00:45 Unwanted feedback 05:23 Society is obsessed with motherhood 06:53 Should I leave bloopers in my videos? 07:23 Reasons people don't want kids 08:24 Why she doesn't want kids 09:50 Relationships change when you have kids 10:14 I go on a bit of a mini rant here, but this confuses me... 11:43 Pros of childfree life 13:30 What her Mom thinks of her decision 14:07 To parents 14:36 To childfree 15:20 To undecided Video I reacted to: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-h43oAxEw0Es.html

@thesylphwind6816 2 года назад

Yeah youngest of 4 and somewhere along the line my parents got it into their heads that I would be the one to take care of them when they were in their golden years. I think they thought that just because I never wanted kids/ my 3 older siblings all popped out 2+ offspring this meant I would be free to do this. Well fate had other plans. I fell in love with a Swede and after paying off my student loans moved from the US to his country so we could live a life together. My dad more or less let me go with only the occassional guilt trip when we were face to face visiting them. My mom, oh lord my mom did not let go and got demanding beyond reason. I never called enough (I was in school 5 days a week learning Swedish/Trying to have a life/Spending time with fiance and his family). I never told her enough (there was nothing to tell, my life was pretty much a set mundane routine). No one was around to hangout with her/support her the way I did (I'm your kid not your friend!). All my older siblings were the worst and being mean to her (Meaning they wouldn't jump when she snapped her fingers). My dad was the literall worst and did this or that stupid thing and wasn't listening to her the way I did (Seriously the way she talked about dad sometimes hurt the worst. If that had been anyone else I could have told them to shut up; but it's family so what can you do?). She eventaully got so bad that she threatened to call the cops on my partner if I didn't call/write her once a week because clearly he was stopping me from doing this and abusing me.

@bethanykennedy812 Год назад

You're actually right. I'm not a parenting expert by any means. But I've seen the experts weigh in on this. The best thing you can do for your child is to maintain a healthy and loving relationship with their other parent(s). The kid will get over not going out to dinner because it's date night and they're not invited. But they will not get over the divorce of their parents.

@jenmar9428 3 года назад

Soooo trueeee about vacation. My hubz and I travel mostly off seasons. We are going to Malta this summer. We are going end of Aug, less crowdy. 😁

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Sounds great! Off season is the best travel time.

@CerealExpLain 11 месяцев назад

For a long time I wanted kids or rather I should say I thought I wanted kids. I say my childlessness as a failure as a woman. I hated myself and my body. As I started to love myself I learned I really do not want to have kids. I wanted to kids to feel better about myself admittedly. Very happy to say I went from being childless to child free as I am comfortable being who I am.

@laurenstone7785 3 года назад

I've decided to be childfree as well for alot of reasons since I was 16, I'm 17 now and because I'm young I hear you'll change your mind alot. Because of this I've only told 4 people about this choice, and am not looking forward to some of my other family (who were close to) finding out (and will only tell them if they ask directly) because I'm sure I'll hear this and many other unwanted opinions.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Unfortunately a lot of people assume that if you're young you don't know what you want, which is so silly. I knew when I was younger than you that I didn't want children. You'll hear many unwanted comments and opinions, but that's a great time to educate people that having kids is a choice. Hang in there! 😀👍

@tylergnosis2581 3 года назад

Have you ever done a video on people who don't have kids but they are dating people with kids

@andreal5947 Год назад

I still don’t understand who it’s selfish not to want kids.

@marymojsovski3239 3 года назад

I know a old lady that her daughter came once a year for mother day. But watching this all ways feel me in life. Thank you start this you tube without kids

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

You are so welcome.

@maholidaylife381 3 года назад

Traveling is a reason for us as well. We can save the money - parents spend on kids - for a nice holiday and we can travel off peak season which makes it cheaper and places are less busy. Makes sense to me.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

100% a perk!

@galyauzunova7110 Год назад

Love your videos! My neighbors have a disastrous marriage. They live above me so I can tell! In order to fix their marriage, they had a kid. It became worse. So they did the most logical thing. Had another kid 😂 now they are divorced but still live together as they can't afford another place. No one is questioning their decisions. Mine are questioned all the time. I have a great marriage and a cat.

@009girljxijkaj4 3 года назад

Motherhood is not for me.....and Motherhood is not best part of a life...

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I think most people that watch these videos don't feel that motherhood is for them, so you are in good company. 🌻

@SuperSuperspoof Месяц назад

6:17 “Just because someone doesn’t want kids doesn’t mean they hate kids” True! I like the personalities of most kids I interact with, and usually think highly of their character. I just don’t like their biology.

@mariailardi7321 3 года назад

I L💖VED the video!!! I also really L💖VE your channel as a whole! 🥰 Btw I personally actually do REALLY want children (I am just looking for my “Prince Charming” lol!) I was just wondering if you had any advise (perhaps even make a video, just a friendly suggestion 🥰) on living your best child free life when it’s not something you planned! Or even helping someone who is childfree but didn’t think that’s how there life would be. Like if someone finds out that they and there partner are sadly infertile, a person can’t find a partner, a single person or a couple get turned down on other roads to parenthood like an adoption that didn’t end up working out & just any other attempt to parenthood that just doesn’t work out! Cause I think it can be just hard to then find that perhaps fulfillment/joy/laughter/unconditional L💖VE a parent gets to give that they were looking for in having kids. I was just curious if you have any advise cause I do know you said that you did choose to be childfree and you seem very happy and fulfilled & how someone can get there or help someone get there even when they feel that they didn’t choose not to be parents. Thanks 🙏 🥰💖💕😊☺️

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

This is a really good suggestion. Thank you!

@ktrudy1 2 года назад

Same here with my furs. ♥️

@anij80 Год назад

for me is the third one! i just simply don't want them!! Being in the military its not an environment that i want to bring them in. I'm deploy a lot, i cant imagine leaving them behind. So i choose to be CF. But im very happy being the Aunt to my niece and nephew!!!!!! they bring all the joy into my life and im content with that!!! :D

@lindseye2750 3 года назад

I agree with you about the whole why would you put your partner on the back burner. I don’t understand that at all

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

🙌😃

@mcc5295 Год назад

great video

@ivetteh2275 3 года назад

Everything about this video is so true. I never thought that this community even existed! In my culture children are a given, and I've been asked, lectured, "counseled" about having children. I have heard the exact same questions that are in this video from family and friends. I love my nieces and nephews and I work with children, but I don't want a child of my own. I have thought long and hard about this and I'm just not willing to bring a child into a world that is collapsing, and giving them a mom ( me) who is emotionally stunted. Thank you so much for making these. I feel understood.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I'm so happy you found this channel! It's so important that we feel validated and supported in our decision to not have kids. 🙌

@kaylabean3693 2 года назад

I love this! My sister has a kid and it’s a no for me😅one of these days I would love to get a cat though! But I’m in no rush at all to get one, I love my money and freedom😭😭

@WifeWithoutKids 2 года назад

Cats take away a bit of your freedom…and some of your money. 🙀 But I love having mine.

@coffeepandacat Год назад

Just don't tell people that you don't want kids. I don't tell people anything then again I'm a loner who only focuses on planting security for my future

@ash8436 Год назад

Question: Who's going to take care of you when you get old? Me: Money🤣😂🤣

@Zikomo7 3 года назад

It’s hard to separate your wants from society’s expectations. I used to say I wanted one because I wanted to say I had a child that was a lawyer or a doctor. But that’s messed up. Also my BF and I are struggling with our dog. I hate that she can’t feed herself or go to the bathroom alone. I never even trained her because I didn’t feel like it lol. I probably wouldn’t enjoy being a parent. But it still seems like the thing to do

@Zikomo7 3 года назад

Btw I love my dog and I’m not giving her up. It’s just odd that I’m overwhelmed by her sometimes and I’m thinking about a baby

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I think we are so bombarded with the message that we must be parents that we just assume it's what everyone should do. I'm sorry to hear about your dog, but so glad you are still taking care of her.

@Zikomo7 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids Oh yeah I love my puppy, but if I’m struggling to feed and relieve her on time, I don’t know how I’ll handle a child with multiple feedings and diaper changes. There’s so much of motherhood that looks horrible. The morning sickness, your tire track stomach and stretch marks, sleepless nights, watching stupid kid shows, all of it. But so many people keep doing it. There has to be something to it

@theaqua1517 9 месяцев назад

We live in the 21st century. Parenthood should be a choice not something that MUST happen to you no matter want . Society wants you to follow the path that suits it the best . But the truth is you will be judged no matter what you do

@studiosandi 10 месяцев назад

All of this is based on our ability to choose for ourselves. How is this conversation going to go after the worst birthers really get ahold of our wombs.

@pamelahough3896 3 года назад

PHILIPPINES! #1 reason to have kids is for insurance! Haha have a kid to take care of you when you get older!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

The only problem is that it's not a solid plan!

@DIFFICULTENLIGHT 3 года назад

Can you link the video you are reacting to please.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-h43oAxEw0Es.html

@makinleenipper4161 Год назад

My bf wants kids and I have decided I will never want them. I told him this information and we decided it was a deal breaker but he told me two days after that he wants to be with me more than he wants kids. He will always want kids but what’s me more… would it be considered selfish if we get back together agreeing not to have kids even though he wants to have them?

@powderandpaint14 Год назад

It depends how strongly he wants them. And also beware incase he is thinking that you will change your mind over time or he can persuade you to have a kid.

@daisiesandpandas1218 3 года назад

In cultures where they indeed go live with their children and it's a shame to be put in nursing homes, the parents don't have to say "take care of me or else", the rest of the society will shame and frustrate the children into doing so.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I imagine a lot of children have experienced this.

@skylinefever Год назад

I have heard that in mainland China, men are legally required to support their parents, but women aren't. When the one child law took effect, parents committed gendercide to force children to be insurance policies.

@studiosandi 10 месяцев назад

So off subject. But every time I see one of your videos Hannah I think what beautiful eyes you have.

@saxabass Год назад

I wish people had more self awareness. I know without a doubt I am not meant for customer service, so don’t tell me to apply for that kind of job. Same goes with kids. I know 100% that is not for me.

@WifeWithoutKids Год назад

Absolutely. We know ourselves pretty well.

@jenmar9428 3 года назад

Your kids are not your nurse nor your retirement plan. My mom wanted me to take care of her financially. She lives in the Caribbean and I live it Europe. It would be impossible to take care of her if she is sick.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes, very true.

@ashlynprather45 Месяц назад

I feel like it does affect your parents too tho.

@anij80 Год назад

no that's not a healthy relationship! my sister has a very healthy balance!!! both of them are involve in raising my niece. You have to have a balance between your kid and your spouse!!! i think my parents and my sister accomplish this!!!! My sister and husband are very happy, and they find time to be together (romantic time). They take full advantage when my niece is in school as well!!!

@WifeWithoutKids Год назад

That’s great that your sister and her husband have a good balance. It’s nice to hear that they’ve been intentional about their relationship.

@nataliefontane 3 года назад

I completely agree with what you said about spouses getting moved to the back burner. I think people who say this must have only gotten married so they'd have a sperm or egg donor.

@crystalmoon4419 Год назад

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤❤❤❤❤

@mumbai1119 3 года назад

Having children in a pursuit to be looked after in old age???? Is old age a misery ...if so then why have kids in the first place KNOWING FULLY WELL THAT ONE DAY EVEN THEY WILL BE "OLD"

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I think being older will have all sorts of perks too. 😀

@juliewest6114 3 года назад

I can't have children due to poly ovary somdrome

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I'm sorry you've had to experience that. I hope you have a community around you to help support you. 🌺

@juliewest6114 3 года назад

Thankyou

@countylivinginstyle2830 3 года назад

I think being a mom is the most rewarding thing in the world for me. I love it, I do not feel I have made any sacrifices as I adore my children and seeing them grow and turn into the people they have is not a sacrifice no material thing could ever be worth more then that. But i am grateful people do not want to have kids as the population needs to shrink so that there are more resources so I think sacrificing having children is better for us that wants them. Bonus, - everyone wins.

@scorpionqueen66 Год назад

I don't understand why people are so damn pressed about other people's lives and decisions!!! Why is it that people who choose to live their lives the way that they want feel like our decisions affect them?? I'm so sick and fucking tired of people who feel like they're entitled to tell others how to live their own damn lives!!! Why does my decision not to have children affect them so damn much is exactly what I don't understand!!!

@Sophine Год назад

I'm visibly annoyed by adults in my family when they ask me certain things. And I don't even live with them. I can't imagine always having a twisted face having a child that I have a live with. The folks who say I'd be a great parent don't want to hear that I'm actually this happy and fun because I'm not caring for a child 365 days a year. Being the fun aunt is always great for me because I give them back after a set amount of time. Plus I tell people this, I go to jail 40 hours a week to get paid by the county, not to be locked in a cell by a county officer. Oh and also I don't believe you should ignore your partner just because you have kids. I'm an affair child, but my dad and his wife focused on raising kids and when they all grew up, my dad told me that regardless of the rockiness in their relationship, they truly have nothing in common and are living in the house with each other like random friends. He told me if I ever get married to never treat your partner like second class regardless of what you got going on.