WIFE WITHOUT KIDS REACTS: If You're Torn or Unsure About Having Kids, WATCH THIS

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You might be torn about having kids and if you are, watch this video because I think you just might find it helpful.
Watch the entire Women of Impact video here: • If You’re Torn or Unsu...
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WIFE WITHOUT KIDS REACTS
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In today's Wife Without Kids react video I'm taking a look at a Women of Impact video that discusses how you should approach the child free topic if you are unsure about having kids. Deciding to live child free by choice is a big decision and there are some questions that you should ask yourself first. Thinking about how your life is right now vs how things will change is a good place to start. Having discussions with your partner about living life without children is also very important because you want to include them in your decision. Most importantly you have to be true to yourself and if you really want to live a child free life don't be afraid of it and share that with people around you because that's who you are.
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Опубликовано:

5 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 117

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Are you still struggling with the decision of whether or not to have kids? It's a big decision! 😯

@wifi2166 3 года назад

Nope, sometimes I see tiktoks of babies doing cute things and say oh that's cute but I don't say "oh i want one!" just don't seem to think like that and hopefully i never will!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

@@wifi2166 Ha, yes that's relatable!

@reyrey6295 3 года назад

Very much. I just dont know.

@Kurbie1987 3 года назад

For me its like a 95 % no and 5 % maybe. This only has to do with the fear of ending up alone. My husband is a smoker and i now allready have doom scenarios in my head that he is going to die soon. The only other really important person in my life is my mother and she most likely is going to die before me. But to have a child based only on this??? How selfish and compleet mad would that be?! I have dogs and also a few nice friends and maybe if that time would come I have to look for more contacts, hobbies, pets instead of wanting to prepare so much in case of incertainty in the future by even adding on with other incertainty that comes with having a child... et voila I think I am now up to 99/1% just by accepting this 😅🤣

@rach3511 3 года назад

Im sorry i am more and more sure with every day of my life that passes

@SUPERHONEYBUNNY 3 года назад

Having kids because you're concerned about your legacy is just hubris.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Legacies don't tend to last forever...and yes, I would agree, not a reason to have children in my opinion.

@dnkza 3 года назад

In the words of Maya Angelou, "Your legacy is every life you've touched" 💝

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I like that!

@thebrightestrainbowever3841 2 года назад

Yes!💜💛🧡 We don’t need kids for that. So true! Another beautiful quote of hers.

@libruh1798 3 года назад

Why do people feel like they "need" to leave a legacy behind? 7m+ people on this earth, not everybody is going to make a dent and thats okay. You don't have to.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Not worrying about leaving a legacy really takes the pressure off! We have enough to think about already:)

@lindseye2750 3 года назад

I think you can leave a legacy without having kids, I don’t even consider them peoples legacies to be honest, I think it’s volunteering, giving, etc

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Agreed!

@wifi2166 3 года назад

As said in my favourite movie franchises of ALL time: Batman Begins: "It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me." - Billionaire Bruce Wayne/Batman!

@theMermaidRhonda 3 года назад

I agree! I work with an animal transport service, all volunteer and we've saved countless cats from shelters by finding them homes and working together to get them wherever they need to go. I think that's a pretty cool legacy.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

@@theMermaidRhonda Love that!

@theMermaidRhonda 3 года назад

I feel so lucky to have married a guy who also did not want kids. Fortunately we both have siblings who did have kids, so our parents are all grandparents. We like being the cool aunt and uncle. :)

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

That's a good role to have. 😀

@erinperry07 3 года назад

This is what I want

@laundrybasket2689 2 года назад

Same here! I am the youngest of 3 siblings and became an aunt when I was only NINE. I’ve been around kids my whole life and I’m fine never having any kids of my own. I’ve been “the cool aunt” for a long time now, lol. My parents became grandparents a couple decades ago, so I feel no pressure. I’m still trying to find a good guy for me who also doesn’t want kids though. That battle is proving to be a lot more difficult than anything else.

@wifi2166 3 года назад

why is she SHOUTING??!!! my child free ears are delicate and not used to loud nioses like crying babies

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I really struggled with getting the sound right in this video and it didn’t come out great. Sorry. 😞 It kept getting louder and louder as the video progressed. Maybe because she’s changing locations so often and she’s also very energetic/passionate about the topic so that definitely comes through! At least the video won’t put you to sleep! 😆

@rach3511 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids Dont be sorry you do great work

@alinciocan5239 2 года назад

Because I decided to be child free, I want my legacy to be "boys scout rule", meaning to leave the place cleaner than I've found it. What I try to do is to leave the world a better place than I've found it. I donate to charity 10% of what I earn, try to be a nice person and have a small carbon footprint on the world (by walking, using the bike or public transport).

@amberklaire9419 3 года назад

My significant other's mum really desperately wants grandkids, and literally the only reason she doesn't like me is because she knows that I do not want kids. I'm terrified that it will actually jeopardize our future. Obviously, his mum gave up a lot for her kids... and so did my parents, but I still don't want them.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

That's a difficult place to be in. Yes, I think a lot of our parents have sacrificed for us and it's very appreciated, however that doesn't put an obligation on us to have children of our own.

@bonniestar4707 2 года назад

That is a hard place to be in, but she won't be the one raising the kids

@kamalelwa3505 3 года назад

It took me until I was in my late thirties to figure out that the best way to handle all the negative comments was calmly! People don't know how to react when u don't blow up at them. Esp. The ones who are hell bent on proving their point!!! I to knew early on that I did not want to be a mom...as the oldest of five and growing up with a baby always on my hip I feel I had served my sentence!!! Would you believe that when I got married these same people tried to tell me how disappointed my husband would be! My husband and I both had talked all this over before marriage and he agreed with me but others did not see it that way. It is sad that society tries to condemn what they don't understand. I am so glad I found your channel. I look forward to your videos each week!! I feel it is a shame to become a parent when you really don't want to!!!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes! I agree, I think staying calm tends to work best. I always find it strange when people assume that my husband will be upset with my choice...we did talk about it before getting married. 🤔

@Myria83 3 года назад

Side comment: her house is freaking HUGE!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

No kidding!

@minas4752 3 года назад

I hope that the concept of the “life checklist” will change, so that people will not get the false hope that they will become grandparents. I think this is what happened with Lisa’s mom- if that checklist was not in place, then she would not have been counting on being a grandma her whole life and then getting disappointed in the end.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

A little revision to the checklist is a good idea.

@jy840 3 года назад

Children aren’t your legacies. It barely takes any effort to conceive them unless you have fertility problems and it’s basically viewing a completely different person as an extension of you. That’s a toxic way to see your children. I just ask them “so who are George Washington’s children? Surely because he was such an important man in history he would have even more important offspring to continue his “legacy.” Oh, what’s that? You had to google it? Only to find out that he didn’t actually have his own bio kids? It’s almost like his absence of children was overshadowed by the fact that he was the first president of the United States and basically started off the American government. Gee it’s almost like that’s his *gasp* legacy or something. One that still lives on to this day as more and more people continue to take the same role that he started with the purpose of making it better (debatable whether many of them did the ‘bettering’ part). No children required.”

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes, there are so many accomplished individuals in the world that never felt the need to have children.

@sarahg9632 3 года назад

I agree on the legacy piece... To me a legacy is the positive passion and energy you put out into the world in hopes of making it a better place (service to others, artistic pursuits, inventions, curing diseases, etc)

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Absolutely!

@margaretwerncke5307 3 года назад

You shouldn't need to explain or justify the life choices you've made for YOU to others but alas...In my anecdotal experience, childfree couples have more time to give back to the community, visit hospitals, send care packages, donate money to charity, and foster/adopt animals that have been abused. All of that makes a lasting impact. Plus, my two best friends are child-free and are at my house in 15 minutes to watch my kids whenever I have an emergency. I can't count on that with my "mom" friends. That's "legacy", too. And with the whole "I want grandkids" thing, there are plenty of kids that already exist in the world that need love and care--volunteering, helping families with addiction, sponsoring a child for the holidays are all ways to get out that nurturing grandma energy (and good to get involved in regardless if you're a grandma or not).

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

That's how I think about it as well. We can do things that parents can't and that's a good thing in my opinion.

@monica070980 3 года назад

At the beginning of our relationship, my boyfriend and I both thought we maybe wanted kids but we eventually both changed our minds and went into our marriage knowing that we were going to be child free. You definitely need to talk to your partner!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

So glad you guys are both on the same page about that! Yes, it's a very necessary discussion.

@laurennasuti2817 3 года назад

I never think about my legacy.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Me neither!

@xumix007 2 года назад

I don't mind about legacy, who knows or is interested about our grand grandmothers ( or grandfathers?), I even don`t know their names ... maximum your legacy will be remembered in one generation.

@WifeWithoutKids 2 года назад

Exactly. I know virtually nothing about my great grandparents. My grandparents and parents never talked about them.

@InvinsibleZero7 6 месяцев назад

At best ,you will be remembered for two or three generations ,maybe even four at absolute maximum but nothing more . Having kids won't give you eternal memory of you . Like many others who are alive today you will most likely be forgotten after your death unless you are famous and/or do something incredible for humanity and even then it isn't certain that anyone would care to know about you and your life

@Sandrilyonaify 3 года назад

I think about my legacy, but more in the likes of writing a really cool book, or help develop an awesome game (I'm in IT), I also create handmade toys as a hobby, I sometimes think that if I get really good at it they will be passed like a favorite little trinket in some families and that makes my heart warm) I don't think that kids are a stable option as legacies go, a lot of things can happen.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Such a great idea:)

@KYLOWW 3 года назад

I know for sure being a parent is not for me and my mom supports me 100% and she wants me just live my life the way I see it. I'm happy this way and have embraced it to where I can focus on my music and to bring peace and happiness to this world😊🙏🏻

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It's so amazing to have family support:)

@wmarch88 3 года назад

I'm 33, I want a tubal ligation, my mom doesn't agree with that, she said that is not for young women who doesn't have a boyfriend, I don't want the feeling of "OMG, Am I pregnant?" I want to be free.

@GF-bw4cs 3 года назад

I agree about the legacy thing. Never cared about my legacy, also I don’t care if I am forgotten when I am dead. I do care about being a positive thing for people I meet, but that is because I care about them and the good in the world. I don’t live to have a legacy, I live to enjoy myself.

@amandadelage8295 3 года назад

#nokidsever 😁

@jabberw0cky13 3 года назад

Good morning Hannah! Glad to see another video!

@Travel_Light_Live_Big 2 года назад

Thank you so much for this video! I love how you encourage other people to live their truth ❤

@beaulieuonnp593 3 года назад

My legacy is making our roads safer, better well being, a better natural environment, making proper traditional cooking. I don't need kids or anyone's kids to be a legacy. I have even planted trees too. i Told my boyfriend right at the beginning I didn't want kids. He was ok with it.

@queen_quackery7613 3 года назад

I think at this point the only kids i want is on SIMs

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Ha!

@gothichippielovechild3198 3 года назад

My twenties weren’t so bad with friend’s and family’s comments. But now that I’m 32 and “my eggs are dying” I get so many more comments about my “childlessness”. My fiancé’s family is Latino and they’re very much about having many children. His step-mom is almost like, trying to haggle with me at this point. She’s gone from talking about us having 2-3 kids, to now being like “Even if you have just one, being a mother is the greatest experience you will ever have.” Haha. My family is Italian and English mostly, so I’ve definitely gotten questions and expectations, but since both my mother’s and father’s families are so large that I don’t have as much pressure. Thankfully my brother is married and intends to have children so I don’t think my parents care too much either way.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Ha, yes the eggs are dying comment...it always makes me laugh.

@gothichippielovechild3198 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids haha yes! And like...biologically...our eggs start dying while we’re still within our mother’s womb...so why don’t they bother us in kindergarten? Or the moment we’re born? Our thirties is not the time to start racketeering.

@xylasoulyoga 3 года назад

I love you channel so much!!! Keep up the fantastic work ☺️

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you so much!!

@roahir 3 года назад

I am so lucky I never had that hanging over me. And that I have an uncle who is CF with his wife so that might help a lot too.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

They have helped pave the way! 👍

@sesbee3620 3 года назад

Late seeing this post, but thanks for sharing

@InvinsibleZero7 6 месяцев назад

It's really hard to say since it's a personal choice and varies from a person to a person . Finances ,if you have health and /or mental issues or not , whether you are mature and responsible enough to take care of a new human being ,what type of a partner you have , if you are capable enough to raise a child ,if you have fertility issues or not ,your career , your character, if you have a support systen to fall back on or the lack of it ,the environment you are in and etc. You have to really think through it and make the decision you believe it's best for you

@stephanieh5478 3 года назад

I don't give a shit about having a legacy. Wish I just KNEW if motherhood is for me! I LOVE children, but sometimes I worry a lot of the "what if's?"

@Goyote 3 года назад

This is great. Thanks ♥️

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

You're welcome 😊 Glad you enjoyed it!

@swswsw7477 3 года назад

Re Legacy ... I think about that all the time as I come from a family that focuses on that even subtly. But... I am a strong believer that your child is not your legacy. I should do my own thing to earn my legacy. If I happen to have a kid who happens to do awesome things and make themselves a legacy... bonus but because I reproduced should not be my legacy. Maybe sounds narrow minded but I mean it to be more in the line of compartmentalizing and self advocacy

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Well said.

@tita6647 3 года назад

Is there anything more selfish than having a child because "It would be your legacy?"

@13masage 3 года назад

Have you read Sheila Heti's Motherhood? I think it's a book that explores a woman's dilemma whether or not to have kids in depth and it's a book that when I read it I felt as though someone finally heard me, even saw what was in my head (that I never dared to say). I highly recommend it to anyone interested, not just women who are undecided regarding having children. BTW, just foundyour channel and am binge watching it :) Great content!

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Thank you for the recommendation. Looking forward to checking it out.

@jessicabrown3445 3 года назад

Great video love her house I've aways been busy watching my friends kids no kids for Jessica

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes, the house looks super fun.

@roadstomiracles 2 года назад

I am a writer and I am focused on putting my next books out there now, I don't have children. I am among the people that are unsure - open to have a child if the right partner comes on time, but also OK with not having kids. However, I feel like my books could be "my legacy" or what I can give to the world. After all, books are forever - we read books by writers that have written them centuries ago, when the writer is already long gone. :)

@tatazuki1451 2 года назад

I DO struggle with the thought of legacy ALOT..!:// I'm 29 female, and have allways been really, really firm with my choice to NOT ever having any children,. But since I was a child I've been possesed by leaving something of importance behind after I'm gone., And Something that really puts me on the fence is the the thought of pass on stuff that have been passed on to me from the generations before. I mean,. What happends to all of it after I' m dead?:o Cuz nobody ealse would give a f***🙊All that history.. I don't know😕sad to think about. -But also like the thought of sitting with your child in a chair, and look through photoalbums, showing who you and your partner were before.. Showing them people that you loved & wants to be remembered.🌷But I can't see myself living that Momma-life.. So many downsides... Would you think it would be worth it?

@WifeWithoutKids 2 года назад

Personally I've never given much thought to legacy and I'm not really a sentimental person when it comes to material possessions, so my answer may not be very helpful, but I'll share it anyhow! Sadly, most people are completely forgotten with the passing of time and that includes our own extended families. Special memories can be shared with people that aren't blood related and I've found that listening to people share their stories can be super interesting even if we aren't family. There may be people in your friend circle that would find your family legacy really interesting. Not all families have tight ties to each other and having kids is no guarantee that they will feel strongly about their own family legacy. When it comes to making the choice to have kids I think you have to really want to be a parent because that's mainly what having a child is all about. It's most definitely not an easy choice, but asking hard questions and thinking about it is a great way to figure out what you really want to do. 👍😀

@rach3511 3 года назад

Just seen an interview from Ellen show with Justin Bieber and its so awkward when she asks him if and when he plans on having kids with his new wife felt so sorry for him 😢 Why are people so dam pushy

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I guess it's something to talk about...also once you get married that's when the kid questions REALLY start to take off!

@rach3511 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids Oh god can't wait for that 😂😢

@sowe3901 3 года назад

@@WifeWithoutKids reason I'm not married 😁

@BeckyJ 3 года назад

I do think about legacy and strangely enough who would get all my stuff. I also think a lot about who will look after me when I'm old, I guess I'll have to pay someone lol.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I'm saving up to pay someone as well! Even people with children end up having to do that in lots of cases.

@haleystudrawa4293 3 года назад

I can relate in a way, but the worst reaction I've had is my grandma telling me "I'm sorry to hear that". I'm only 24...wish me luck 😬

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

GOOD LUCK! 😀

@meluvfriends 3 года назад

Hi Hannah, I hope this isnt too personal, please dont feel like you need to answer if you arent comfortable. Have you ever explored the option of tubal ligation? Or met with a doctor about this? What was your experience? Or what do you think of the difficulty accessing this procedure for childfree women? I am a 25 year old woman in Canada, and aside from wanting to be childfree I also was diagnosed with a chronic illness. I get consistently brushed off asking about this, and get asked how my husband feels often. Id love to know if anyone has had a similar experience to me.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Yes, I’ve attempted a tubal ligation and was shut down pretty quick. Honestly, I think I’m going to make a more detailed video about this topic because it needs to be talked about more! I’m OK talking about it now:)

@meluvfriends 3 года назад

Wife Without Kids thanks Hannah, I feel like it truly is something people dont want to talk about. It almost makes me feel like the whole world is hoping I accidentally get pregnant and become a mother, no one talks about the fear of becoming pregnant for women who dont want children.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

@@meluvfriends Yup.

@stefaniebartels8988 2 года назад

I don't think you need to have kids in order to leave a legacy.

@cameroncorinthian9814 3 года назад

Hi Hannah I hope your well

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I am. Have a great day!

@akachovich 3 года назад

Why do you have to have a legacy?

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

I have no idea...

@maggieallen5985 3 года назад

I’m all for people questioning what they really want out of life, and it’s nice to find inclusive spaces for people to do that. I am going to have a child soon, but I hated the societal pressure and guilting that happened while I was trying to make that choice with my partner. Especially channels like Classically Abby that low key guilt and shame women for not adhering to traditional gender roles and wanting more out of life than just to be a wife or mother.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

Agreed. It's such a personal decision and for some people it's a really difficult one to make. The more opinions people give the tougher it can be. Congratulations by the way! 😀🌷

@reyrey6295 3 года назад

One BIG part of me is totaly sure that I would be a bad bad bad mother. Other part is like: ok, when I have kid this, when I have kid that. How do you decide if u are not sure, 30 years old and in happy marriage 🤷🏻‍♀️ Housband wants a child but he can't so he is like let's adopt or something..

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It's probably pretty normal for people to question whether or not they'd be good parents. Some of my Mom friends that have always wanted kids sometimes wonder if they are doing things right and they get frustrated with themselves over certain situations. There's no easy answer when it comes down to making the choice to have a baby, adopted or otherwise. Personally I think someone should really want to be a parent before becoming one.

@YouHaveAGoodPoint 3 года назад

Yes I thought this too that it wasn’t a choice that that’s what I was suppose to do.

@WifeWithoutKids 3 года назад

It's good to know we have options:)

@margaretflood-elahwal5861 3 года назад

This woman gives good advice but the shouting is getting annoying

@VenetaDimitrova Год назад

I like your videos and really appreciate having those topic spoken more often, but for me - you do come up aggressive on wanting to pull people on the side of childfree. You focus on pointing only the bad sides of wanting kid and make assumptions and judgments. If you real want to make people think having a child is a choice - then give both perspectives respect. I think people will appreciate it more, because now your channel definitely feels more AGAINST children, rather than FOR choice/childfree and just showing the good sides of childfree, how you can grow in that choice, etc. instead of focusing on showing how bad is to have children. I do't know if that is a clear choice you made or you are not really aware you are doing it.