*Think you may have had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist
I just went no contact and blocked her on everything after 4 years of this nightmare. I thought I was going crazy, I didn’t understand what was going on and it was a mind fuck. I started working on myself and grew more than I could ever imagine…I also started to see her patterns clearly and the better I was the worst she was…the irony!! At the end I was respectful and kind regardless of all the blame shifting, stonewalling, silent treatment and lies. It’s been 2 weeks and im still processing a lot, the realization that I was just supply and nothing else is painful…but I know my worth and am aware of who I am now…it will take time and hard work but we will heal! Stay healthy and positive!
I'm happy you're finding peace. I'm 2 weeks from my relationship ending and everything you wrote I went through. My thought patterns are fxxked right now from the insanity of that relationship. Anything that made sense ( to me ), she dismissed because she lived in a vortex of chaos. I had to leave because I was suffering from anxiety and health issues. To describe it best, It felt like I was bitten by a vampire and turning into one. Nothing made me happy anymore, I was depressed, anxious, resentful, & confused. I'm happy I left before it destroyed me. Maybe one day I'll feel normal again. I feel lost and hopeless.
This really hit home for me. My ex called me a narcissist and even got our daughter to call me one after I ended our marriage. It’s only now I’m watching videos like this that it’s all hitting home. I’m left wondering who I really am at times. She’s off onto her next victim already…a married man who has 3 young children. I’m so lucky to have escaped after 20 years of marriage. I paid for everything. Literally everything. I even paid her own bills for her car and phone as well as paying her a wage from my business even though she has 2 jobs of her own. The tide is turning and the chickens are coming home to roost for her now because it’s starting to get out about her and the married man she’s seeing. No doubt she will somehow blame it all on me when it all blows up in her face!
Same here. I have been questioning my sanity and analyzing myself because I feel like I may be the narcissist. I feel like I created this mess because of my reactions to how she treated me. I could have been stronger and more understanding. Instead I broke down and yelled back.
I have been asking myself that for 30 years. My husband is cruel and I am on trial constantly. He also continually critisizes me. I am exhausted and discouraged. It never stops. I feel that my physical and mental well being are at stake as no one... and I mean no one in my life gets it. I have self medicated with food and shopping. I often feel numb and dismissive of bad behavior from my son and husband. I just want to move away and live in the mountains where I can heal and hide.
I'm 58. I had abusive parents, bullied at school, was married to an abusive feminist wife. Now I live a good quiet , happy life. Funny thing was dad, who was a prick, never ever said a nice thing to me. Just criticise, criticise and put me down. I got a job at 16. One day the boss comes over to say to me 'That's a good job. You are the most capable man I've got' I was shocked and asked him if he was having a go at me? He gave me a funny look and said no. That's what abuse does to a person.
I was a decorated active duty U.S. Marine, picked up the rank of sergeant in less than four years (not easy to do in the Corps). Award-winning war correspondent; one of the best in my field. Got out, used my G.I. Bill and earned two degrees. Eventually worked as a GS11 at The Pentagon, doing strategic communications for Headquarters Marine Corps. I didn’t even apply to the job - THEY reached out to me and basically said “We’d like you to come work at The Pentagon.” So, I did, but at 40 I’m now medically retired, although I still work part-time (dating profile creator. Yes, it’s a real job). I’m not proud of any of it. Every accolade I just wrote of means nothing to me. Didn’t go to either college graduation, just had the degrees sent to my home address. I also have a horrible time accepting compliments, because in reality I think I’m a loser. Yeah, 100% of this stems from growing up with a narc mother. Nothing I did was ever good enough, but if I screwed up somehow? You better believe she was there to rub my face in it, like a dog that’s soiled the carpet.
Therapy helps you recover from this type of emotional abuse.. Also forgiveness- which comes after your healing. People can’t give away what they don’t have.
@@lynylcullen8370 exactly this. In hindsight, so much I accomplished wasn’t necessarily for me, but in the hopes I’d “win” the love and pride of both parents. I was recently accepted into a master’s program at a top-tier college. Only this time, I’m doing it solely for me and will definitely attend graduation.
All 10 for me! Narcissist mom. Been working on healing for about a year and a half since I finally found out what the problem was after a lifetime of trying to figure it out. Some of the 10 I've already worked on a good deal, other's I'm still working on. The "I'm sorry" all the time was a huge one for me! Thanks for the video 😊
You just named everything that the Lord has healed me from. I was married to a narcissistic woman and I was diagnosed with PTSD from childhood trauma. For a long time I didn't like to be around people, I didn't talk to anybody unless absolutely necessary and I didn't like to be touched. My relationship with Jesus has changed all of that. I'm actually happy, outgoing and have no problem with public speaking either.
After a lifetime of this kind of abuse. Im so terrified of being it myself. Sometimes i just wanna crawl under a rock and died so i just wont treat anyone like ive been treated
I ended things with my narcissist in October. He tore me down, I’m trying to build myself back up. I started a channel that at least 100 times a day I think about deleting because I’m hearing his words tell me that it’s dumb and I should just give up. And other negative things about it that may even be partially true (like, I don’t have a ton of good content yet) but won’t be for long once I get better at it. Your videos are daily reinforcement against these negative thoughts. So… Thank you. 🙏
No fingers up. Was married to a malignant sociopathic narcissist for almost 16 years. Got out and after 9 years later he is still a problem. I’ve come leagues beyond where I used to be, but still exhibit all these traits. It’s terrible. The constant conditioning and control 24/7 changes you before you even realize it is happening. Next thing you know, you’ve lost yourself.
I divorced a narc 42 years ago , she was a hoe, I had a vasectomy after 3 children that may or may not have been mine. then 3 years later she was pregnant again. I divorced her with proof from the clinic I was sterile. I was granted custody and the home, 3 years later I married a good woman who helped me raise the children and we are still together My narc wife has used 40 years to turn the kids against us and it's working, pray for us.
I knew that I was dealing with a woman that was raised by a toxic family. I have seen red flags and patterns of her behavior. Dispite taking the chance in hopes of my X would change for the better over time. That wasn't the case. I called out my X for who she was. She wasn't able to control me. She left me for a rebound guy. I wasn't phased much after she left. I knew it was just a matter of time. She realized who she was messing with. Their is no taking her back.
I have identified seven of these traits in me. After the breakup she accused me of being narcissistic. Blaming myself I started exploring the subject. That's how I have came across your channel.
Amen to every word Christina. I miss who I was and the joyful soul I used to be. I never feel worthy of compliments. I am always waiting for the next round of criticism from my husband. I have noticed how my body reacts when he walks into a room. I feel my body start to shrink and shut down. I am 100% hyper vigilant and sensitive to my surroundings. It has taken a toll on my overall physical and mental health for sure. Any self worth or confidence I may have, I have had to fight for through all the guilt, shame and self doubt as a result of a spuse and mother who were short on compliments and long on criticism. A genuine compliment from others who I trust is a healing balm to the emotional abuse I suffer so often. I have self medicated for years with food and shopping. i have taken up playing the piano again and a new instrument (mandolin) instead of eating and shopping and dropped 60 pounds in the last 10 months. I am determined to get to my weight goal in spite of all the contant stress. I am still shopping to relax and cope but not as much. I appreciate what was said in this video as it has helped me realize how much true compliments mean to me.
Sorry you have had to endure something so painful and evil . I remember the day I came to the realization that my spouse is a narc and will never get better . Only get worse. That was after 30 years together and many behind the back betrayals. It hurts but it's a path to understanding why one would feel so confused and worthless . Good luck
@@TonyCuellar-z7t mine is almost like nothing compared to you. I was in a Borderline partner for 5 years, and I became a emotional wreck. Another 5 years passed alone, not much support from women, only friends, family (which I am greatful) Anyway, ubder the 5 years I kind of regained myself, still empty inside and desperate for a partner. Well, close to onenyear ago I managed to get to gether a woman. At first seemed nice and weird at the same time. Then it became abusive. Stone walling, gaslighting, almost no emphaty, self centered, etc and it slowly killed me. I broke up after half year, and on therapy, but still have sleeples nights and anxious almost always, hypercigilance, hypersensitive, triggered over even loud rude words specially from women. Still not sure she is a narc or a dismissive avoidant. Maybe latter, anyway, it was and stilla hell. Every night i wish for a nice girl who comforts me. One of my woman collegue asked me to buy a candy for her as well as I go for buy some drink myself. Shebwas so cute and thankful and nice, i went down the park and started crying. This warmness all I would have needed, yet I got denied from my loved one. I just cant stand any more emotional abusing. Anyway, thanks..
My wife died and then i get into a relationship with a Narcissist. I have ALL of my fingers down! Why did I continue to do this to MYSELF??! 4 years!!! I was always told - "way to ruin the day", "way to ruin everything", "good job with the way you're being, you're gonna take US really far"... or - after a gaslight session - "look at how you're being right now! Are you a psycho?!"... What??!! - YOU made ME this way. - "I didn't do ANYTHING, all I did was SAY -"x" - Jesus you're so ridiculous!!" Cheating, lying(especially this), betrayal, deceit, drugs behind my back, drugs IN FRONT of me and tell me "whatever, get mad". Staring and EYE-FkiNg ANY man that she could. Friends, family, stranger in the grocery line, at the fishing dock, someone driving beside us, etc....but if a FEMALE ended up beside me in traffic, oh, it was - "what, you wanna stare at her?! You want her?! Go get her!"... ABUSE. It has ME to the point where I was looking at videos and seeking counseling to see if I WAS THE NARCISSIST!!! Come to find out, I'm a super empath?¿ who knew🤷♂️
I aced it! Yay ;-) Some points fortunately rather in retrospect, some I have to keep working on, but on all fronts there is progressing. I uncoverd the roots about one year ago, and you, Christina, are one of the people who showed me the way and, most of all, validated my experience, which no professional thereapist i tried ever did before. You helped my so much with videos like this to put a finger on, where it really hurts, and I found: There is the gain! To all you out there who can't already see the light in your darkness I want to assure you, that things will get better, when you allow yourself to make space for it and dont shy away from the pain. You are worth every effort and it will pay out, I promise. Pete Walker (inner/external critic), Patrick Teehan (dysfunctional family systems) and others helped me a lot, too, but your efficient and spot on presentations I consider a vital spark that ignited the flame of my torch I hold up with pride and vigor today. Thank you Christina: You are doing great things and I am eternally grateful!
I'm trying to leave, I moved out, but we still talk everyday and see each other regularly. I can't afford life on my own (YET) but I have to 'pay' for it one way or another. It feels so demeaning, but our youngest daughter moved with me and she likes to eat. It's been 4 months since I moved. He makes me feel guilty and says true love doesn't give up. He gets so sad and I give in. I have stood firm that I'm never moving back into that house. It feels like my biggest accomplishment. 😢
Oh these are so good. I jus went thru a bad break with a narc after a 22yr iff an on friendship, hes now a month into my smear campaign..i knew it coming and left and he went on a preemptive strike. Im so hurt but I gotta move on, i cant keep playing this game of back and forth
This has been so helpful thank you. I’d already subscribed but being overwhelmed by other information hadn’t taken time to listen to you. As someone who is diagnosed as a quiet pwBPD I’ve been trying to understand the progression of it within interpersonal relationships since the age of 2years old. But knowing I’ve made myself such an easy target for narcissistic abuse hasn’t helped me avoid it in fact 60 years later, and with dealing with horrendous loss, if anything I seem less able to heal. Now with the suppression of most feelings and thoughts and with diminished energy Ive become somewhat of a hermit existing within chaos and with no motivation to sort out even health risks within my home. I practice a huge amount of avoidance by sleeping and reading historical fiction and non fiction. Writing this is quite shocking as I realise what my life has become. But I realise that without change this will be my life unless I change it. This will be difficult without the finances or energy to do so. But watching your vlog will hopefully be a first step. From the permanent state of underlying fear which is Northern Ireland 😢
I wish I was able to look at this video, I wasn't , dear fella we are survivors, literally. I can't stay in my brain. keep up with your work, you're healing us.
Hey Christina, I don't think I've ever commented on your station but I will tell you that I have been watching a lot of videos over the past 6 months to try to find out what the fuck was going on in my relationship, because so much of it wasn't making sense. I've learned a lot from you and about a dozen other people in this community.. So thank you Christina and a beautiful person, both inside and out... This has been the worst period of my life. And it has been small comfort finding out the specifics my ex's NPD.., but I do really appreciate all of you and I'm grateful for the guidance and direction... Regrettably, I have no fingers left 😢
OMG that is so my husband he had a hellish childhood. I thank God I did not have that kind of childhood. My inlaws trued that same crap on my and I walked away and let them show their true colors to my husband . we have been no contact for several years.
I was abused after the love bombing, and compliments and false promises has passed. Than came the flood. I wasn't affected by her BS. What bothered me is time I can't recoup, but experience of her pattern behavior is priceless.
Every victim I've known had one or two things that brought them down ( from the abuse). Her insanity frustrated me, but the guilt tripping and blame shifting annihilated me, then I turned to alcohol.
I understand , that you understand what I am feeling. After z24 years I discovered why he was physically abuse, after have a good six years before, but I never in a million years that someone had the power to make me fill this way. I was watching Dr. R. Then I started putting the puzzles together. But I fill I am in a constant fight and flight. Every f. Day.
You nailed this one nicely, You have shown everything you explain is all I'm going through. I'm glad to know I am moving forward I couldn't tell if I am or not if I am unable to move at all. Thank you.
I need a video on narcissistic parents and there constant need to punish you, long after you have grown up and became your own person away from there constant pressure. So now you just want a civil normal relationship, but now they treat you like you less than. Because they have more money and 'lived a better life' . When all you ask is they just treat you like the adult you are now and with a little dignanty and respect. 😢 They adopted me at 4 knowing i came from a terrible and unstable life. But now that im doing great out from under all that extra uncalledfor pressure in life. Im doing the best i ever have. But you wouldnt know it, if you ask them. Im tired of feeling worthless because thats what my parents have instilled in me. Going on 40 and am just now learning i am going to have to just let go and move on but its so hard. The trama bond is strong. And how do you just walk away from your parents. 💔
Sorry to hear about your struggle. I distance myself, and push those thoughts from my brain in order to heal. I feel its best to focus on myself and do things that make me who I am. I was happy before the relationship and will be happy after.
All down. Relationship ended 15 years ago. I have all these personality traits. I also have Aspberger's Syndrome and it feels like somehow these traits are intertwined with autism, so I don't know whether I was just a narcissistic abuse recovery victim or autistic when I got my Aspberger's Syndrome diagnosis in my early 40s, but I do believe in my diagnosis because it was given by mental health care professionals.
I'm not sure how many people relate but, my problem with accepting compliments stems from my initial internal enquiry which is: "Is this flattery? What do they want from me/ what would they be trying to achieve?" Is that problematic, or just good sense? I suppose that depends on the conditions/environment one is in doesn't it? It's like they say of paranoia, it's only paranoia if it's wrong, otherwise it's just good strategy. I'm a bit of a broken idealist. 10/10 on this list
It really sucks because I got addicted to hard drugs during and after my relationship with a narc and ended up going to jail for possession. I'm clean now and working towards being a better person but I feel like criminalizing being chemically dependent on a substance is victim blaming/shaming especially when it was partially caused by the way someone else treated me and destroyed how I felt about myself. I didn't hurt or steal from anyone to feed my addiction and I didn't sell cause I wouldn't aid someone to be in the place I've been because it's miserable but just because I was caught with drugs (which weren't even on my person or property, I might add) I'm going to be a felon for life and basically no longer have any damn rights and am going to have a hell of a time finding a decent job. I'm 40 years old and I had no criminal record before then. That was early last year. She also took my children away from me and not because of the drug use. (which I didn't use around them and made sure they were taken care of) When she left with her new man it wasn't uncommon for me to have my girls for most of a month. She would take them for a few days and then send them back. They cried when they had to leave being with me. My ex decided she wanted to accuse my father of touching one of my kids and now she won't let me see them or talk to them and I truly believe it's because she's afraid they'll tell me the truth which is that he never laid a hand on them. They were never around him without me being there or my mother. (my mother and father aren't together and live separately) She won't even let my mother see her grandkids which is another reason I believe she's worried about the child she said all of this happened to is going to say it didn't happen. Right now I don't even know what to do. She's destroyed my character, taken everything from me and does everything she can, still, to destroy my life. Even after she got what she wanted and left for someone else. I don't even respond to her on the off chance she messages me. If she had anything to say to me about my children I would but anything else, I won't respond. I know I can take her to court but I don't have the money for a lawyer and she knows that. Also she would just call her rich uncle for him to pay for a lawyer for her. Sorry for venting and if you read all of this, thank you for listening.
Thanks for another educational video Christina. I have two requests for future videos. Could you do one on why the exes choose to stay in the harem. I don't get why when they've been emotionally abused, triangulated, etc., they still stay. I've heard they are willing to take anything as long as they're still in the lives of the narcs but could you elaborate. Also, we've all heard narcissists can be on a spectrum. Is there a type that only acts narcissistic to their partners. Not to family, friends. The ones I've known seem to have decent familial and friend relationships. However, I see a pattern of abuse towards the partners. Thank you.
When someone compliments me I presume they are just saying that to be nice and don't really mean it, but any insult I instantly believe and take on. I didn't know what a narc was with my ex husband until after, I didn't know they came in different forms and then had a convert narc, nearly killed me, still seriously struggling to let go nearly a year since he discarded me out of the blue. Devastated me and still being treated worse than before and just can't seem to stop even though I know it. I am at my wits end with myself.
I dated overt narcs and knew those patterns easily. The vulnerable narc has patterns I haven't seen before and that's what ruined me. It threw me off and confused me. Before I knew it, I had anxiety depression and health issues trying to please my ex. I knew the only way to save myself was to jump off the sinking ship. I miss her but don't miss the gas lighting, blame shifting and guilt trips. I lost my mind arguing with a woman who makes NO SENSE. I realize, I was insane.
9/10 healing is exhausting 😢 I've never been able to hide my emotions very well even if I was shamed for them lol Im not where i was but im not on the healed side. Ptsd and fibromyalgia are exhausting. I could use some hope that this gets better😢
I put my fingers down immediately the moment you mentioned each thing and I strongly relate to each one. I don't necessarily believe that my mom or that my possibly soon to be ex-partner are full on narcissists, but there has been so much narcissistic behavior from them in my life that I've basically turned out the same regardless. And I struggle with telling myself that these things are okay to feel and that these responses don't themselves make me a narcissist, which is something I totally and struggling with right now.
I've been confused as to why when someone compliments me, I don't really respond, and I feel like it's sort of abuse. Like I'm waiting for the hammer to drop. Why are you being so nice? You're going to hurt me, aren't you? It's weird.
HOW DO I GET OVER THIS?! I LEFT THE NARC IN FEBRUARY. I'm trying to go full no contact, I've blocked everything - but she emails me. So I blocked that, and now it still comes into my spam, but I READ IT!!! HOW do I STOP MYSELF¿¿¿ I KNOW she's a narcissist. I KNOW she's a drug addict. But I won't listen to MYSELF anymore. HELP fix ME please..... I HATE this!!!
I've been involved with several narcs (including my father & brother), but luckily, I also have a strong sense of self. I used to have a higher # before I started learning so much about narc abuse, but I'm around a 5 now and hope to lower that #.
Yes, 3 mandated reporters turned my now ex roommates because they were abusing me financially, emotionally, and even i was threatened. I am still so angry! Ive been gone 2weeks...
10 out of 10.... but identified most of it already...its 3 yrs ago that we "broke up" ...somewhat euphemistic. Thats a good summary and I hope there was nothing left out. But I am in a healthy relationship now and my partner has experience with the topic...she knows that there is something in my past when I over-react...I try hard to give good compliments... that was so poisoned in the past... I also discovered that I get used to this narcistic point of view in a way that I for myself adapted narc traits without any real reason. Thats not me... Just a manifestation of projection. Thx. for this Video..., yes its essential.
I absolutely struggle with compliments, and it's like, I know that I have a lot of talents that I can share with the world in terms of performing, and other things, but, being seen would mean being complimented and praised, and although that's what I want, I also sabotage myself to avoid that happening. And I guess it's because in part, being around my autistic ADHD mom who homeschooled me and my two younger brothers 24/7 meant that I got all of her huge range of strong emotions, meaning that when she was feeling particularly in a bad mood and/or hormonal, I would just be at the mercy of whatever flew out of her mouth, in total contrast to the nice thing she would say when she was otherwise in a good mood. She had huge mood swings though and so in the end, compliments didn't really end up validating me because the same things that would be complimented would be complained about later if they became inconvenient or distracting at all. Just, getting those mixed messages was a challenge to navigate. Plus, having autism and ADHD, I'm not the best at recognizing or understanding the source of my emotions, and so when I do get complimented, it gives me complex physical feelings in my chest which I find uncomfortable, partially just because I don't really have a name for it. I was only diagnosed last year, at 32, which has meant I have quickly had to do a lot of reassessing of things I assumed about my life.
Our family narcissist was certainly an alcoholic, and her ancestors are infamous for their alcoholism, so most of us six kids refrained from drinking. I stopped apologizing when I was a young child because doing so just made things much worse. Otherwise, all fingers downs. What did I do about our narcissist? After 46 years, I walked away. She'd been dead for over two years but, sadly, our family is still dealing with her crap.
The only one of those that I don't do, is the apologizing. I think it's because I hate phony apologies. I have gotten nothing but phony apologies my whole life and never a real genuine apology. And I won't do it to someone else. I am someone who will apologize when I am wrong, but I will not apologize when I did not do anything wrong
Lovely... I got like 6 to 7 of them. Especially easy triggering, over apologizing, negative self-talk walking on eggshells. Does using alcohol to help numb feelings about one's work place [especially because of certain people there] count for that one regarding drug and alcohol use?
After my narcissistic break up my mother once walked in on me crying in the dark, she turns the light on looks at me says nothing then turns it off and walks out of my room.
My tally is at seven out of ten. My biological father is a narcissist, and I saw him every other weekend for most of my life; he would frequently criticize me, frequently get angry over nothing, and if I tried to defend myself after being criticized or I cried because something happened at school or at my mom's house, my bio father would say that I was overreacting or that I was too sensitive. If he offered something, he would take it away at a moment's notice, or he would give it to me but make me feel bad for wanting it. He tried to mess with my memory, telling me that one particular event was more dangerous and traumatic than it really was, and he would always badmouth my mom, both in front of and even to me and my sisters. He constantly made me feel like my wants and mental necessities were unimportant, including dragging me along to big parties year after year, and when I inevitably became overstimulated, he would come talk to me every few minutes. Saying things like "You should be enjoying the party, not sitting here in a corner alone", and "Are you done now?" As if I was, somehow, broken and a burden, simply for being autistic. I was a people pleaser, I would try my best to word things delicately when around my bio father, and I wouldn't tell anyone if I was upset or getting overstimulated. I struggle with accepting compliments, I have low self-esteem and low self-worth, and I would cry softly in my room instead of crying in front of anyone. I also developed negative self-talk, and I was hypervigilant around men. I broke away from my bio father and went no contact four years ago, but I'm still working on many of these behaviors and/or coping mechanisms with help from my mom and my therapist.
I have to wonder if the narcissist that recently abused me was in fact a victim of narcissistic abuse themselves who simply adopted the tactics of their abuser?
Too many people label others narcissistic when they themselves simply are playing the victim. This video will only bolster them more. Hate that there is such a thin line batween the two. Or maybe I'm just narcissistic 🤷
I recently split with my ex and these signs were showing from her previous relationship. My only problem is that she had done exactly what her bf prior had done but to me. Cheated, walking on eggshells etc. She went from Narcissist victim in one relationship to the abuser in the next. Can anyone make sense of this? 😬
She did not experience anything. All those were just projection and a pathological liar. That is how they do smear campaign. They see their rubbish behaviors in others and not on themselves that is why it will be very difficult for them to change. Get close to her ex and you will be surprised what you will discover.
No. I cannot relate. That is sort of my problem. I was touched by an angle and lived with a narcissists. Somehow the angle won, since, well, my grandma was like a living angle. When I ended up in an abusive relationship, that still applied. I simply cannot relate to a lot of what you say, since no, these things never happened to me. Like not at all. Somehow the abuse I faced as an adult, is so hefty and serious, like an insane power battle, yet I still walked the tradition of my grandmother, and it never left me. So to me, it is strange to see a lady making narc videos for ages, like for instance Ramani, or how the message always seem to be the same and the stuff I have always been told, like your videos. Because my experiences are far more intense, just insane compared the cosy stuff in your videos. I simply would not use the wording that fills the youtube, as it to me feels shallow and completely insufficient. I also find myself not recognizing at all a lot of the points made, yet the bad stuff I went through is just insane compared to the cosy world you present. Not sure what to make of this. But I kind of have moved far beyond the breakup, and sort of trying to study the narcs is simply not my thing. They are simply not worth it. Life is too short. I kind of ran into this issue with the health care profession, in which if you live with real and present abuse and threat, there really isn't any healthcare for you. The reason seems to be a world wide need for governments to abuse parts of the population, and simply to avoid the health care sector to document all the horrors the actions of the government imposes on its targets. One example would be gypsies in Norway, or gay people through history. I rather would like for a movement in which people dared to speak up and tell about their symptoms in public, like what abuse might lead to. Some what it lead to, others, what it currently does to them. There appears to internationally not be conducted any real research, on for instance what to look for in a passive observation of parents and kids, that would be good indicators of abuse or violence. There appear to hardly any info available at all, on what to screen a medical journal for. Mine is a disaster, but nobody seem to know to look for the really ugly signs in mine. Not sure how that fit in here, since the state of things in Norway is rather different, as we have no concept for abuse, guilt trip, gaslighting, repent, etc. We also pretty much define to force someone to do something almost to the letter at we define violence, and that is the only way to converse about violence and abuse around here. That all being said, these videos of yours are not really that bad. If this is relatable for people, these seem pretty fine to me. I guess I am just fighting far bigger monsters than this.
