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Borderlines do a lot of the same things that are manipulative in nature. I am still trying to get away from my BPD ex gf but she'll do anything to manipulate me into staying around even after I finally got out of living with her. I wonder if she's not a covert narcissist as well comorbid or mwybe even ASPD and BPD. She claims to have been diagnosed with BPD but even getting her to say anything about it was very difficult and took lots of time because she kept denying it even though she straight up said, "I have an extreme fear of abandonment." I knew right away and should've left right then. As much as she lies though, I'm wondering if maybe she said she's BPD but maybe she knows she's something else as well but won't tell me. Regardless, she does a lot of the same things covert narcissists do.
These people seem CRAZY. I have a sister, x/husband and cousin that all have a lot of these traits. l look at myself and try to fix myself and try to learn how to deal with the abuse, now l am FREE. Praise God l understand that it wasn't my fault. l pray for my healing and l pray for my past abusers. l totally forgive them. l will NEVER again put up will the constant abuse. NEVER because Jesus is my physician, my hope and my life. All glory be to the Lord Jesus Christ for saving. I pray for them in a humbled way cause l am SOOO. beyond glad that l am not oner of them because l cant imagine how they survive everyday living and existing with that personality disorder. God help them. They honestly need constant prayer,
5:51 I may or may not have already commented on this video. Yet here I go. I don’t care about my truth as much as I care about the truth. Even I have the ability of being wrong.
😂 My favorite "compliment" I was given: "Your cooking is really starting to taste like mine." - Given by a guy who constantly criticized anyone's cooking b/c it didn't measure up to his which he also loves to boast how 5⭐ his cooking was. He once said he would kiss himself for his cooking. 🤭
Husband's mom is a covert narcissist. She does. The eyeroll huffing constantly. Deflects, dismisses, victimizes, got flying monkeys . Husbands mom always makes comments about my weight cuz im thin . She is on diets noe to be thinner . I know shes competing
Truthfully, it's difficult to gauge some people because everyone is different. There are those who might not be rude to the wait staff, but they have other narcissistic traits or qualities that otherwise go unnoticed, especially in the initial stages of getting acquainted - the good old mask goes on. Also, narcissists are just as knowledgeable on this topic, if not more so, than your average psychology buff. With all of this talk about narcissists so readily and abundantly available, it would be a cinch for someone to do a quick google search on what not to say or how not to act. Now add physical attraction to the equation, and the average person with good intentions suddenly sees things through rose tinted glasses. It's a catch 22 in that sense.
No gray matter in their brains no empathy at all of try to mirror ours. Condition love. 23 years with my husband learning. He has all the signs of covert narcissist. His whole family are blind and don’t care about the truth. He can’t change and says he isn’t changing period. 2 kids together so I working on a it. Thank you for sharing!
As far as the backhanded compliments go, what my narc does that I finally figured out after about 30 years, is to say something like "those are nice boots" or "that's a nice dress" and that is supposed to be a compliment. It took me over 30 years to come to the realization that he has never complimented ME. He compliments inanimate objects. As you can see I am not in any of those sentences. Remember when you were a kid in English class and you had to diagram a sentence? The subject of the sentence is the inanimate object - the dress or the boots. I am nowhere in that sentence. I came to the realization that he has a real problem with giving a person a compliment. You would say the same thing about a dress hanging on a rack at the store or a pair of boots in the window of a store. Where am I in that compliment? He compliments inanimate objects and tries to pass It off as a compliment to to you personally
My daughter is so disrespectful with me. She used to call me, then kinda laugh at how I sounded when I answered the phone..I called her on it but it hurt. Why bother calling someone you are so ready to ridicule even before we’ve had a conversation. What a strange thing it was. I felt demeaned ..why call if you don’t like me? I’ve had to distance & it helps but she’s still calling me too much..
This is interesting, but I hope those who are thinking someone in their life is a Narcissist that they really looks at all aspects. I have been called a Narcissist and many other hurtful things because I do have a need for control and I want things to be done a certain way which can cause arguments, but I am also super self critical, self doubting and hold myself to extremely high standards, and recently found out I have OCPD, traits can be similar but the whole picture is what is needed to look at and not just a couple of points because not everyone is saying something to feel superior or to belittle people.
Yes after months and months of neglect and abuse I wouldn’t take it anymore so I started to do and say things to hurt his feelings. Suddenly he says I am being abusive.
So they punish people. Does god punish them too? Had anyone seen any punishment to narcs from God? As they ruin peoples life do they get any punishment in this world?
Wen i was 10 years old, i developed jaundice. My mother coudnt care less. She just left me lying for days on the floor. I was very very sick. She did not take me to doctor and gave me no food as i was vomiting a lot. So basically just abandoned me and went about her business in the same home. After a couple of days, my father's sister in law visited and was horrified at my condition. She immediately took me to the doctor and from there took me to her home and kept me for a month. She fed me, bathed me, cleaned after me and nursed me back to health. Iam alive today because of her. I will forever be grateful to her and still call her mama to this day. Shes old now and i hold the maximum respect for her and her husband and children.
"My daughter in law doesn't cook much, but she sure can clean up fast." (after my son bar-b-ques). It's a special occasion and we are cooking and she is invited. My husband bar-b-ques and I do everything else including cleaning after dinner. I really almost fell over when she said that. I replied, ' WHAT?'' in complete confusion. I wasn't ignoring it, I called her out, and she shut down on that attack.
I went to the hospital because of cardiac problems and when I got up to go to the bathroom he got in my bed and fell asleep. I was left to sit up in a chair. Everything you have talked about, I have experienced. It's made me sick.
Thank you for taking the time to explain this so clearly and well. It makes so much sense. I wonder what kind of trauma that the narcissist, as a kid, perhaps before narcissism developed, endured to understand kindness, compassion, and emotional connection as shameful. I always wonder what happened to my mom when she was little to make her have this kind of shadow and mask. Does anyone ever talk about the kind of trauma that creates a narcissist? Because I feel bad for them since it seems like narcissism is a trauma response itself. It's sad they can't change or get better, if that is true.
I in a 10 year marriage relationship right now with 1 if I shut down dont say nothing to her she trys to be so nice telling me she sorry what she did to me I hate that
I agree with you because all that you said, I've experienced it... And still is, fortunately for videos like this I'm dealing and handling the situation a lot better. Thanks for your video ❤
Got fed up hearing you need, you want, you should. Just bc the narcs life is going nowhere you feel you have the right to tell me how to live MY life? Control freaks 😅
Narc friend would always run to me as if i could solve their problems. Then after listening to them whine about it they would give me verbal abuse with some intimidation mixed in. When people speak to me i dont tell everyone what was said, to me thats the lowest form of conversation. Half of the things the narc says about people im 💯 sure they tell others im saying bad things about them. Trying to isolate and put me off from trying new things all bc the narc thinks ill leave. Well that happened had enough of the juvenile behavior gaslighting criticism unwanted advice total BS higher than thou attitude with no one for the narc to dump all this on hopefully people will see them for the snake they are
