I made the mistake of letting men borrow money or being too generous in the name of love. I learned a critical and valuable lesson. Now my motto is " I don't have it". Or I'll pray for ya. God will provide for you.
Listen I was dating a dude and when holidays came up he was being cheap I asked can he get me something that was under 15 dollars but yet wanted me to buy him something over 60 dollars and right then and there that was a red flag and he never even brought it and I did buy him something that was only worth like 7 dollars but I never gave it to him and I ended up dumping him when he wouldn’t buy me a teddy bear that was under a dollar soon as he said “ I ain’t buying that sh*t” he was blocked oh and he asked me right after that can I buy him things from the store that was worth over 40 dollars 😂😂 like boy bye
@Xoxo Kiss I dislike guys like that. The guy I “dated” spent between 15-20 dollars but only fast food and a subway “date” (which was only 2 times) then he stop buying me food and started asking for expensive sh*t but yet wouldn’t ask me to be his girlfriend like my guy friends told me anytime a guy that is not even your boyfriend ( even if he was your boyfriend or husband) ask you for money they become a b*tch because only b*tches that have nothing are gold diggers( not women there’s a difference between a b*tch and a woman) and broke which is true. This all took place when I was 18 I’m now 20 and the guy is about 23 or 24 and now he sleeps with underage girls and he got exposed on social media this year to the point he moved out the city
“Don’t let a man experience your money. Don’t let a man experience your money inside of a year. Because if you do you no longer know whether that man want you or your money.” TG🙌🏾🙌🏾
All I ever did in my earlier adult life and mys 20s, waste my credit saving money on these broke men, a broke man will keep you broke and slow you down
Truth, use this to spare others. You need to make a RU-vid video someday on this. We always here about it happening to men but it does happen to women a lot. Young ladies need to know as not everyone was taught this by their elders.
ya PLIS never everrrrrrrrr give your money to men....im fem gay boi n grew up with sisters n got female friends ....men will use your money to pay for sugar babes....hotels...sex toys...lincerie...force u to pay out of your own pocket while he horters hispocket change money
@@mayasheartdesiire glad u know...but ya next time you date a guy even if is just fwb...pull out your calculator and subtract all that extra money u make n keep it to yourself so both r in the same level when it comes to spending.....i have a friend who trusted her boyfriend n left her and stole her lots of money in cash...once his ex gf milked him dry he tried come back to my friend n i said DONT DO IT....HE IS USING U...i hate to say it but he sees you as a milking cow because you are older and got buisness n hes younger n broke. ...when it comes to men i train my sisters n friends because i know how men act when females r not around wish i had camera so all could see how sad men see females n im just a fem gay boi who happens to see both sides...but ya Beyonce hope u find a guy who not pursuing you as a milking cow ...good luck
@@newworldorderordis-order6803 I hope your friend didnt take him back smh I would rather stay single than to just be a fwb too many stds going around for that. These men cannot be trusted like that. I’m keeping all my coins
This is exactly why I broke up with my partner 2 days ago I got tired of him always asking me for money like yes I make more money than him but I do not make money to give it to you
Women need to also be careful telling a man all there business. I know a lot of women that do the most to keep a relationship with a man that they talk to much and tell the man to much of there money moves. A lot of these men not all are out here for self and don’t have no problem living off a woman. Being single gives you peace and I like my peace way more then dealing with a man who just want to use me. I work to hard for my money to give it away. Tony is speaking truth of how it is out here.
Exactly! Meanwhile the man not sharing his and he is asking "what are you bringing to the table?". I listen to Reddit post yesterday where the woman has property ..house etc...started dating a guy who move in with her .. paying her "rent" ... She told him about her investments etc ....he kept getting at her for his name not being on the properties....he apparently did not want to get married ... they eventually got engaged...he "apparently" showed her the receipt for the engagement ring showing her that he "always" wanted to marry her and not interested in what she has 🤣 ......so of course she was happy that he proposed.....go figure......
Amen...peace of mind is not something I'm willing to give up easily. I got one more year before I turn into my mother and get real comfortable being by my darn self.
That’s true. In fact, if he finds out that she’s saving money in the house for something significant like a new house or something, he’s going to run off with that money and disappear forever. So indeed, keep your business to yourself.
That's right.... I made the mistake of telling a man to much and I see how they try to get money out of me.. And when he couldn't.. He started arguing over it.. Saying I should pay his way...I told him... If he needed money so bad.. Go get a better job.. You're not touching a penny of mine..
No that is a lie. A huge lie. Men work, men provide. Grown Boys kick their feet up and thats where it is twisted. So many females deal with Grown Boys and decide to call them men which then waters down the title and term MAN.
I have a friend who created a family trust so that she may be able to take care of her children and grandchildren.... I dated someone once who wanted to "manage" my money ...use my debit card....my spidey senses went up ..I never had money after that.....
What a joke! These grown boys have no shame in their lame game. They want it all and have little to give in return! They want loyalty, respect, sex , a good body good hair, hot meals, , our heart, random favors AND access to our life savings! No thanks I’d rather stay single..Not a fair trade! Great video Tony!
I watch this video and it describe my hubby to a T. OMG! He finally works now but he wont share his income with me. He wont pay bills but he wants me to be submissive to him in everything and every way. I am ready to walk bc i had enough of his lies. Thanks Tony.
My man came for the 4th surprised me with a new grill and gave me $200. We were in the kitchen and I was talking about us spending more quality time together and he told me “Baby I can’t be broke around you”. Basically he was telling me spending more time was fine but that he has to get his money. I loved that and respect him so much!
@@diamondthehygenic1093 nope it turned out we were not compatible! At least that’s what I gathered from it. Fast forward to the next month my birthday he was a no-show no call no text his birthday was three days later. We didn’t spend that together either. It was pretty much a wrap around that time. Go figure!
I was watching an interview with the R&B singer Stephanie Mills one day. In the interview she talked about how she gave a couple of guys brand new luxury cars and she went on to say she's a giving person. So then they asked her what's the most expensive gift a guy ever gave her and she said no one has ever given her anything. She had a sad look on her face for a second and I felt bad for her. But ladies that's a lesson to learn.
This is nothing but the truth! I had a ex outright steal my debit card and wipe out my bank account before I realized the card was missing..he said bc he needed money and knew id tell him no,, but he knew i could easily make it back in couple months.smfh...needless to say, I pressed charges and he went to jail! The bank gave me the money back. I've been on several dates recently and once they find out I work for a bank, they say, " well you work for a bank, you should be treating me to dinner"..umm separate checks..never call them again! Don't count my coins!
@@user-rx7uh9mg4f Told the guy trying to become my bf to save money when he was telling me he got a penalty imposed by his university. His first instinct was to turn around and ask me to lend him some since he figured if I was telling him to save, I might have some savings laying around too! 😂 We've known each other for a year, he has not even bought me a solitary fucking flower, expects me to Netflix and chill and had to be guided into buying us food on the date. We're in college. Strangely, he won't ask his own father for money but expects me to give him. Lol.
1) Always tell men you work part time at a bookstore or something that don’t pay too much! 2) say you ain’t got it then Ask him for some money right after he asked you! Lol 😂 If he say no or tries to barter for a free bed or sex, 🏃🏽♀️ RUN. A REAL man that’s into you will never ask a woman for money or house!!! Even men in wheelchairs provide & even side hustle to get paid.
So true lol when I ask my man “ baby what r u thinking about?!” The answer is always “money, babe! Money!” 😂 he always wants to provide for us ) I swear!
Definitely in NYC this rings true you talk about money and just mention things to them it’s hillarious to see how they behave worse than women smh… they will even even call other men big bro because he got more money even tho they older than him 😂😂😂
I really needed this. My ex used me for money and he never wanted me to begin with. I'm not broke or high and dry, but he gave me a good lesson. I managed to make him so angry that he dumped me. Now, I know that was God protecting me. Thank you, Mr. Gaskins!
My current bf and ex both have mentioned about me being a nurse continuously. My ex used me so badly. My current has tried but I pay broke. Im like "damn, I paid my car for 2 months and Im so broke".
There are a lot of stories of where the guy goes to the lawyer ...get divorce proceedings in place...put the house for sale ..or change the locks....take all the money out the bank ...or the ones where the man has money ..investments.. properties and the woman's name is not on anything ...I saw the latter when I worked in a property management office ...geesh ..
I think he actually loved her though she divorced him he tried to fight for the marriage. He was still with her even she went broke. She stop believing in his dreams but then got mad when he's rich he still broke her off though.
@@roja_xo5527 Her problem was letting him know she had money. Her sisters warned her not to tell him. He did the same thing Tony said men would do. He got lucky. It was too late for her though.
@@kimberlygreen1078 exactly right and to be honest if I did what she did I would've wanted my investment back. He gave her 10 million but at that point she didn't care about the money
Nah we have to hold the woman accountable in this movie. She should’ve never married him but she stayed just so she could have a piece of a man. Anything after that is partly her fault as well.
Everything I know about boundaries expectations, self-worth, I know it from Tony!!! I used too be so so so foolish before all this, he has taught me what my dad didn’t- and every dad on this planet should teach their daughters self respect, self preservation, dignity above all! 👑🙏🙏🙏
Tony you are absolutely right on point! I lived it for 2 yrs. A 57 year old boy. Who has worked for a School District for 30 year's as Head Of Security. I couldn't get help with nothing. It was a learning experience. Very abusive in every way! These type of men are extremely dangerous! They don't want you to do good. Lost everything I worked so hard for. I could write a book about it for real!! THANK YOU TONY FOR EVERYTHING. I WALKED AWAY FROM HIM & THE CRAZY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP MONTHS AGO!!! Thank you! Ramona
I’ve already ran into a man like this. He was always asking what’s in my bank account, saying I buy too many clothes etc. yet he was the one always broke. He asked me to buy food a couple times and SWORE to pay me back but said he will once I needed it back?? Yet he’s ALWAYS on snap demanding his guy friends to run him his money he won in bets... didn’t even say thank you... nahhh I need that same respect.
Married a man just like he's talking about. Got married. got a joint account. told me he's going to get the checks from the bank for me. Didn't see the money or checks for 3 months. In the meantime he's buying all kinds of clothes. he said for his job. I bought furniture for the home. And he complained! I got a separate account. He came short of getting a divorce that night. He was probably spending my money on the woman he had on the side. Good lesson learned. I won't do it again.
@EnJoy Life And Smile yes they do. A woman is a woman no matter the color. I'm Hispanic. I stayed with him b/c I had lost my income. Life was hell until I finally turned to God. He built me up while ex would tear me down. God showed me that I was his queen and was from a long line of royalty. When God seen I was strong enough to withstand ex tearing me down He gave me a job so I could get a divorce. I learned to trust God. now he the ex still buzzes around thinking I'm going to take him back. Not going to happen.
@@lyfren9429 I am hispanic and was with a black man. I have believe in 50/50, but he took advantage of me and he wouldn't even do 50, just maybe 5. He worked overtime and said he didn't have more money to help me. I think he was saving it for his dream car or who knows, he was so secretive
This guy that lives in my apartment complex is very attractive! And since I dont have any friends, he spends time with me whenever I give him a few dollars. I paid his car insurance last month. But whenever we are hanging out, he is always talking about how badly his Mom and Older Brother treated him when he was little. I sit there and listen for hours sometimes. He never ask me how I am doing. But he so nice and sweet and kind to me. He didn’t finish High school, and doesnt have a GED, but he does have his own car, and sometimes he do contruction where the job pays same day/same day. He only goes to work every so often. He’s always knocking at my front door, but now I stopped answering it. I don’t know what to do if I might see him in our apartment complex parking lot. Everyday when I go walk my dog I see his car, and for some reason I get this calming feeling on the inside knowing that he’s home. When his car is not in the parking lot, I kind of boil on the inside. But I don’t know why... He goes to the food pantry to get food. One time I went to walmart to buy him alot of groceries....... I don’t know what to do if I see him, I don’t want to make him mad by ignoring him, and he does something crazy like mess up my car out of his anger of me acting like I don’t know him.
This is why I’d rather stay single, broke men can break you. Being in a situation like this is the worst thing that can ever happen to you, it can hurt you emotionally and mentally.
I'm living it. I've not giving him any money but was tempted to. in fact so far I'm 33 years old and I've never given the man money although I brought gifts. he's broke with no job and no money
@@jaybae7315 no they did, the thing is females entertain Grown Boys and call them men. It isn't the same. A real man is about his and don't want none of her money.
What’s funny, is it’s crickets in the comments regarding other men!!! This ain’t a popular message. That’s how you know it’s real, THE OTHER MEN AINT SAYING AMEN BECAUSE THEY DONT WANT US WOMEN TO KNOW THE TRUTH. Thank you!
Lol I don’t tell these men I am a nurse they see me in scrubs they all giddy asking are you a nurse ?and I ask what kind? they say RN .. I am like no they like you should do that after I tell them I am a CNA.. they like you should do RN and then NP lol... too bad those bozos don’t know the whole time I am a RN.. these men something else do no give them money.. these men gold dig worse than women .. prime example is Supa Cent and a bunch of other instagram rich women they always get a man that live off them
@@TheLadyQuashia Supa doesnt want to date on her level she wants to date guys that are unemployed or underemployed.Not going to say rich guys are going to be nice but these broke guys put her thru the ringer .I think its a control thing with her ..You cant be a millionaire and date a man that has zero dollars like Louis and have a child with him hes going to use you and cheat a lot because he feels like a child in the relationship.
This video was long overdue. Women listen to this video 5 times. And to those who say NEVER and don't understand, listen to the video 5 more times. These grown boys will come into your life with a job, a grind, etc. They will put on an Academy performance for your family (best man winner). And then as the relationship matures, kids become involved, they will gradually turn into complacent unambitious men living off of you. I see so many women dealing with this, and others who are hiding the fact that they are taking care of a man financially... because it's embarrassing.
most men with bad character and no purpose ask women for money and mislead her because she has a good job and ambitious. It’s definitely a lot of nuances and caveats to it..,
I really appreciate TG saying "My wife works with me". Most men would say my wife works for me. This shows true respect and appreciation for TG, his wife and his marriage. Awesome!
How admirable. It's fantastic seeing a healthy couple like this because a lot of us didn't have healthy examples growing up. May God guide them and their children to the right path and bless their marriage.
Tony, there were no lies detected in this video. You were spot on! Unfortunately I’ve been a victim to this 🥺... I ignored the flags but he was a grown boy.
Tony, why are you so real...omg. How do we thank you. This is how I know God is amazing. He sent you. These men out here is exactly as you describe. But then God sent you to open up eyes and shut it down for them. Thank you Jesus.
The reenactments of the bum explaining how he’s going to finesse the bag is hilarious ! I’ve seen the exact scenario play out , everything you said is a hunnid 💯
Welp, let me sit single a little longer. I’m not ready. Just being honest. That kinda games right there just reminded me of the stresses which is why I became single in the first place. Ouuu lawd...😥
Husbands aren’t ish, either. You heard what he said. He’s also talking about married men that don’t love the women they are with. It’s sad. I really wonder how God expects women not to hate men. The majority aren’t about anything.
This is the absolute truth....say PRENUP.....oh my God, he act like I called his mother outta her name!!! I am going through this right now and just called off the wedding. He thought he had a meal ticket, but when your business woman, you know you have to protect yourself and assets.
@chrissy....the funny thing is my assets are left in a trust for my only child managed by my attorney...he cant contest anything! But he showed his true intentions when I brought up prenup, most people are familiar with what that is, not a trust fund.
@@mydiamondlifestyle. Smart!..LOL... I don't play with my coins either. My ex learned that the hard way. He went into so much legal debt trying to fight for HIS... including spousal support. He's a straight up donkey.
The last guy I talked to made the same amount a year as me or so he claimed and he was broke. He said more than once he didn’t understand how people make it alone. Etc. easier with two people etc. stuff like that. And I’m thinking I have bills.... I make it just fine and I have plenty to spare and save and I live comfortably. I got the feeling he just wanted help. The type of guy that just wants his and yours. Weird. He gone. 👋🏼
Almost sounds like you and I were dating the same dude 😆, he used to say, "My grandmother said that 2 could pull better than one ", asked me about moving in with me and I shocked myself how fast I said NO! He already had his priorities screwed up, 45yo renting a studio apartment for years in the hood with 2 cars (1 brand new) out front
This has left me speechless . Most men never saw the women as their equal . Some men are just evil and unsecured . Instead of becoming your team mate , he becomes your opponent . Wow Tony !! You really preaching the truth !!!!!
Those same men that will use a woman for money will be sleeping with other men on the DL. .. GOD (the application thereof) is the truth the way and the LIGHT- teaching you all things and blessing you with discernment.
You guys should watch Walter Lee on you tube he is proudly gay and will tell you about these down low men,his videos are eye openers i love listening to him !check him out' you want be sorry!🤞
now this is on time. i went to bojangles today. before i could get my car in park, there was a man standing beside my door asking me to buy him something to eat. first of all, he was too close (that 19). second of all, 🗣 NOT MY DOLLAS!!! 👏🏾
@@arandaholley1719 well my mind is like this find out what a man wants and try to fulfill it. Such as cook clean look nice etc. On the regular but I can tell you it Don t work even if your pretty. And do it all. Men will get complacent until you leave ot he leaves in an ugly way as well. Its never pretty.
The power of the words is so real..u also have these men that love to say “money is nothing, if I have it it’s whatever...” But never pay u back for things you pay for. I got got doing things out of caring for the man i was with. It does hurt but I have to take a accountability for wanting to please him. I’m moving on. I know i deserve something better
Tony on a roll again! Omg, I was laughing so hard because he is speaking nothing but the truth! Don't nobody bring orange juice to Thanksgiving. 😭😭😂😂😂😂😂
I’ve listened to this twice now and I think I could probably listen to it two more just to get more gems from it. Such a seriously well delivered message on a topic people are afraid to talk about. However...let me say “he bringin the orange juice ...” took me out!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂 .
Tony, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again... you are THE ONLY Black man on RU-vid I take ANY relationship advice from. I know you got our backs, everybody else is questionable 🤨
@@LetThereBeLight1111 You are so correct. You knew that Tony Gaskins was married, is married and treats his wife with the utmost respect. You know he loves his wife and Tony Gaskins tells the truth. If your feelings get hurt than you know you have work to do to make a change.
you are going to save your life ...Tony is always sharing and giving and thank goodness for his generosity......however don't just listen ....you still have to do the work
He told me to become one flesh means all the money needs to go in one account. When I disagreed with this he told me that was a deal breaker. I told him bye.
It's funny until it HAPPENS to you! When you as a woman don't your own money, you take an emotional, spiritual and economical HEAT and HIT both at the same time. Our bodies as women were not made to withstand that type of force ! We to listen to these message every day until it sinks into our dna!
Thank you for breaking this down . Do not let a man experience your money . Then you will not know if he loves you or your money . Any man talking about my money and sex is a turn off anyway . Run ! Run ! Run !
They will use you for money. Take it from me. I got stories for days.. this is why you don’t give men any money at all. They will use you for that every single time. If you let them have even an ounce of your 💰. Please please please listen to Tony!!
I literally just had a grown boy ask me for money. $5 he “claims” he’s starving & doesn’t have anyone to depend on .. mind you when we lived in the same city he did nothing for me. Made excuses every chance he got. Thank God I didn’t send it to him. But he tried to guilt trip me into sending it. Claims nobody is ever on his side. Boy PLEASE🙄😭 thank you Tony for everything you do !! It’s hard but I’m staying strong !
Wow I think I have this kind of man. I have given him 150.00 he has not paid me back yet. I just got a very good job and he keeps talking about wanting a charger. Well I found one yesterday and I suppose to go back this Wednesday to put down 1000. GOD meant for me to here this. Thanks Tony
This is so true. The ex- husband told me, while im 6 months pregnant, he would take me and our son on vacation. He slipped and mentioned it was a timeshare. OMG I told him no, I wont be sitting for hours with my 5yr old son anywhere. I said, we can wait for you to sit down and plan a proper vacation. Needless to say, we never went on any vacation throughout the facade of a marriage. He is a cheapskate too. Thankfully I didn't have any money for him to be after. I had just became debt-free when we got married. I had a good paying job that I left for this man. So glad I escaped that toxic relationship. He was a narc.
@@julianacheriza1575 It's a business arrangement where there are joint owners and each can use the property as a vacation home. You usually have to sit through hours of boring talk and the perk is, you get maybe a hotel stay or something else for free.
Mr.Gaskins, thank you for using your character, sense of humor and experience to change the lives of others. Please don’t underestimate the good work you’re doing here, and for your wife, she’s a true faithful queen. God bless your family and protect you from any evil! In Jesus’s name amen.
“He shouldn’t know what you earn” TG........... Very true. Ladies we shouldn’t be discussing figures. And don’t ask him so he won’t fell entitled to ask you..... Just observe him. Make sure he can pay his own bills without the help of family or other women. And even if you don’t ask discuss it, watch how you carry yourselves on dates. Men are not completely stupid. They can recognize designers. They know what restaurants are popular and expensive. So if he ask you to go to McDonalds for lunch, you don’t have to turn your nose up. I know you like steaks and asparagus, but at least say, “I don’t eat McDonalds but I love Popeyes.” Wear your designers every now and then but Target got some good clothes too. Just switch it up.
I wholeheartedly believe what Tony is saying. I've said this and I'm glad a man is confirming it. I knew some men were jealous of women that are out here doing it And have more than they do.
Thank the Lord for the remaining few good men out there who love hustle and takes his place in the woman he Loves life as the man God called him to be ❤❤❤
My only question is always the same: “Why are so many men especially black men, content with mediocrity?? Why not advance your skills and education so you can have a thriving career?? Women pretend they are ok with this guy that has low ambition but they are not!!
Y'all out there on a kayak. I know Tony says he doesn't tell jokes, but I holler on every single one of his videos🤣😂! The looks, the props, all of it! God sure does have a sense of humor, because Tony, ain't right😆! But, at the same time, I am in class, with my notebook, learning all I can.
Yes I have felt that from some men wow destroy use become jealous of who suppose to be yo man wow and been hearing other women down thru the years say they felt their man was their enemy and jealous of them
I am up at 4:05 am currently hiding making plans in private to keep this man out my pocket. Until I can safely get away from him I don't want to be unalived in stuck in a dangerous situation. And jealousy has been shown from him because we do not hold the same passions or ideals in life . Please keep a stranger like me in your prayers ❤