Afraid Ex Won't Reach Out During No Contact 

If you want to stack the deck in your favor as much as humanly possible then sign up for a coaching and DO CRAIG'S COURSES. Seriously idk where I would be if I hadn't found this. The courses are in depth and so well done you'll know you got your money's worth by the end of part 1 of section 1. It doesn't matter how many no contact videos you watch if you don't DO THE WORK. As a wise man once said "This is the way"

If your ex doesn't contact you during "no contact", they probably would have not anyway, so you have not lost anything. But you certainly increase the chances they will, and you may have a chance, if you do strict NC. Don't sit around though - improve yourself!

I’ve been in no contact since late in February. By choice. She wanted to be friends. That wasn’t really what I wanted. Broke NC in late March or April (can’t remember exactly) with the clean slate message. No dice as to be expected, haha. Been in NC ever since. Around May things started getting better. June was kind to me and July has been even kinder. Still have the occasional pang of loneliness but I started a new job in February and that has been an absolute boon to my health and well-being. Things do get better! I didn’t think they would but they did. Do the work on yourself, it’s vital that it’s for yourself. If they come back then it’s a blessing but I’d much rather them come back later, after I’ve done extensive work, than sooner. In fact, my goals have changed entirely, now I’m working on myself for myself!

1.5 years since the breakup second time around so glad to hear I’m not the only one Craig. Healing the broken heart takes a long time.

Been in NC for only a week and few days. It’s miserable. I have not broken and won’t. I have been running and exercising and working on myself. It’s still not easy. Spend each day upset and I just push through it and refuse to give in to NC. Thank you for these videos. I watch them when I am feeling anxious and helpless.

I love how everyone says no contact is the best strategy and works a lot and then reading through comments and 99% of them say they haven't heard from them in over a year plus and that they have already gotten over their exes. That's because NC was made for you to move on and not get your exes back. Its all about healing and moving on.

Love and miss you Margaret. I’m so glad we have these videos to watch you. ❤

I do not agree with the sentence : "to get a 2nd opportunity." If anyone is there to fight for that 2nd opportunity is your ex. It's up to you if you want to give them a 2nd chance, because it's them who broke up in the first place.

These two are amazing, and not to forget Coach Victoria, they’ll put you at ease. I listen and watch these videos after I cry and I cry each and every day, sometimes more than one time in a day. Just have to remind myself that it’ll get better in time and to work on myself and have faith that my ex will come back, she was my world!

Great to see you & Margaret this morning. Thank u for this topic Jana - Texas

Mine will never. He is too avoidant

Thanks, really needed this today as I've been struggling to prevent myself from messaging my ex Fiancee all day. Managed to keep my head clear and continue though.

If you want to book a coaching with us, you can only do that on my website. There are lots of scammers who will DM you on Instagram. They use pics of me and put my name in their email! So ONLY THROUGH MY WEBSITE

Fantastic advice . Be prepared for the Ex to re-initiate contact. It’s been 5- 7 months.

Been two years and he reached out..... hardest two years of my life.... we were together for 17 years. It's interesting that 3 of his guys friends left their partners with 6 months of eachother- We'll see what happens as this story continues...

Great video.. dynamic duo

Craig I just wanted to say I wish I was a success story but unfortunately I’m not. It’s been jsut over two months since my break up and I did beg and plead and do the grand gesture (some difference circumstances for me). I found out yesterday she’s already dating her best guy friend that she’s known for about a year and half of me and her 2.5 year relationship. She truly has moved on from me and the bridge is burned. Pretty sure she broke up with me for him but won’t admit it (was emotionally cheating) I have closed the chapter of my life. I wanted to thank you for all the video that helped me get through many days of no contact and that kept me from falling apart. You truely are doing gods work.

Now I'm in no contact, and I'm working on myself, I go to the gym and I want to get back to the way I was before and I feel better with these videos, and I hope to get back the life I had with my ex, and I believe in that. Thank you coach, you help me a lot in all this. I hope for a better life with the person I love. And everyone, believe in what you are doing, I wish you success.

Went n2 NC for 30 days. He came back. Is gone again. He started it a year ago by reconnecting & saying I was the love of his life! 🙄 I was shocked but fell for it. I’ve known him 30 years. He was calling me & talking on the phone all day long for months. He has now pulled the rug out from me for the 3rd time. I’m devastated. Don’t think I will ever get over this. Cry ever day. Can’t sleep. Can’t get out of bed in the mornings. 😢 Now back in NC day 2. He now claims he doesn’t want any relationship with anyone & has no feelings due to broken relationship of the past. 🙄 i told him he could have told me that a year ago. I said I only want the most loving & caring peeps in my life. Told him he harmed me & disrupted my life. He apologized but if someone is “sorry” they won’t harm U to begin with IMO.

I feel the odds of my ex reaching out are about the same as the odds of a meteor landing on my head which is probably a good thing 😁 Yes of course I miss the feelings that I experienced in the good times that we shared but I sure don't miss the bad times and there were plenty of them. I've been putting in immense work towards personal growth and now I don't settle for the BS and many women are trying to prove their worth to me. I found the workbooks to be very helpful. I may not have fully healed but I'm in a much better place than most people emotionally so it seems and I work at a mall in New York and deal with many people from many places and cultures. Do the work people.. it's so worth it. You are worth the time and effort.

My 2 year anniversary is August 1st, after a 6 year relationship that ended in cheating. Looking back two years ago, I was obsessed with getting my ex back. Literally checking social media numerous times a day. I lost my job, my car, had to move across the country to live back home and my mental health was at my lowest point. Eventually over time, my interest in this person decreased gradually. Took me about a year and a half to completely not think about them every day. I've worked on self-development, got a better job, purchased a new car, signed a new lease on my own and sought professional help. Now I get the attention of way more attractive women and I am happy my break up happened. I would have never had these things, had my ex not dumped me.

Been in NC since January, I was dumped by ghosting. Since then I've got to see his car parking nearby places where I walk my dog. His mother and his sister poped to my shop. For a whole week he has been driving the same roads I go to work every day. I've stayed in NC since there where any significant message to me.

I have to thank you, Coach Margaret and Coach Victoria for everything you do with these videos. I went through my first ever breakup five months ago and it felt like the worst possible pain imaginable. You're some of the very few coaches that keep things realistic and have given me hope to be able to move forward without obsessing over unhealthy ways to cope or "attract an ex back". Yes, five months later I would still love to talk to my ex again and possibly try and repair things, but you guys have helped me realise I also have things to learn and better about myself. I took up hiking to try and distract myself outside of my house, and I've been able to climb three mountains since then! It still hurts to think about it, but it genuinely does get easier over time, and the mention that it's okay to grieve for even a year or more really helps to put things into perspective. In my case we had a good relationship of about four years, barely ever argued and he wanted to remain close friends, but I had to walk away for my own emotional health and it's been almost 5 months of NC since then. I've wanted to reach out many times, and I am so glad I've been able to hold onto the silence for this long - otherwise I don't think I would be in as good a mental space as I am today. I know you guys have talked about this before and maybe this could help for a future video, but my only concern right now is about whether to text him for his birthday which is coming up next month, something simple like wishing him happy birthday and hoping he's doing okay. I have the feeling he's also not reaching out out of respect for the space I asked for after refusing to stay friends, and I would feel bad letting the day pass without telling him anything since his wish was to remain good friends. Any advice would be welcome, but still, I just wanted to take the chance to thank you Coach Craig for the channel and share my experience. It's hard, but your advice genuinely does wonders for the mind and heart.

As they say in communication, no communication is still communication!!

Love your channel Craig. What if the dumpee DOESN'T need to work on themselves. What if it's the dumper who is the one who needs to revaluate how they have been/acted? I'm certainly not perfect, and I do need to work on my insecurities, but it's my ex who needs to really do the work as it was his mental health that broke us up and his actions 😞

10 month breakup, 4 months NC not a peep since I told him not to reach out again unless he wanted more than friends. NC has allowed me to grieve which has been key to moving partially on - I no longer have the urge to desperately reach out to him. I still think of him everyday but I've changed my life since the breakup - in my health - physical and emotional, career and social side - my friends have noticed that I'm back to being me again and are so proud of me. I'm starting to give up hope that he'll ever reach out he's avoidant and is more likely to just find someone new then work on what we had for 4 years. I had those ahha moments really doing the work and knowing how to have healthier relationships with myself and others, I wish I'd done the work earlier in life.

A month and 4 days into NC. She blocked me on everything. A week ago she unblocked me on instagram and hearted an apology for the way i reacted to the breakup i sent on twitter a couple days after the breakup. Kinda messed with my head a bit but keeping NC up. Feeling a lot better about myself. Been hitting the gym and focusing on school.

It’s been a month today that the woman I love said she needed space. It’s been absolutely awful in my head. Im anxious and she is avoidant. This has been a ride. Thankfully I’m doing the work to change my attachment. I miss her and her daughter so much. I am so sad

Nice video, thanks

Hi Coach Craig - I'm looking for a video where they are the one with the mental/toxic issues, but I still love them and want to work things out, but they think "just changing partners" is always the solution, as opposed to fixing themselves? I admit, it's hard to shake her & I should!! (i even left her in february) but because she's so much a part of what my life was and we did have plenty of good times and chemistry, i just wish she'd see we could make things work. She said so herself, that things are so easy with me that she hasn't found that dating - yet, she's dating again!

Thank you for these videos and advise. I can't pay you. I know you are right.

Coach Craig I need you immediately. I submitted my session already. I'm panicking...

Starting no-contact today after failing to do so for months. Got to the point where she was practically begging me to stop pursuing her, even though we'd made a lot of progress by building the emotional connection. I feel absolutely sick, and I'm really worried we will never repair this relationship. But...I'm determined.

I haven't seen or heard from my ex, it's been 1 year. She left me, because she was suffering with ptsd

I have my location shared with him on Google maps. At first I didn't have the strength to shut it off now I know it'll be another of the final goodbyes.

I am not afraid anymore of him not reaching out to me anymore because I learned to love me that I deserve better

RIP Coach Margaret

It's been 6 months since NC. I do have this hope that she will reach out but I also feel like the hope is killing me. Like constantly thinking of her. I've been going through probably the most depressed I've ever been, and I've started drinking a little. I'm trying to be better.

It's not that I'm afraid, it's what pattern has emerged over our entire relationship. In 12 years, if she has never apologized for anything; if she has a history of running away and the silent treatment and will never come around unless I reach out... I think the likelihood of her reaching out is not good. And I guess there's always that percentage that never will. Regardless, I will stick to no-contact because it's the best way to go for all the countless videos and points you have made making your case for no-contact.

Good Advice

I been dating my girlfriend for almost 3 yrs now. We had some disagreements over the time and she would stop talking to me for a few days then I would call her and we would make up. A month ago we had another problem she then told me this relationship is not working for her and she is tired of doing everything by her self. And its better for her to be alone. I never reply I went into no contact right away she reach out to be exactly 30 days via text. Saying good evening. I reply and said heyyyy nice to hear from u. How r u. She said im good. I reply let's getogether and let's share our good news . So we had a date we made up. She told me she miss me. And asking me why I didn't reach out. I told her she broke it and she will have to fix this also told her she have to make it up to me. We spend the night together. Guys hang in there this no contact thing really works its amazing its like magic . Thanks coach Craig and the other coaches for your videos. Thabkbu so much guys

She started dating someone after we fell apart in December. We talked on and off and got back together til like April. A few weeks after they started dating. The guy just posted her on instagram that he loves her for her birthday which was Sunday. I was gutted, but we dated for 2.5 years and I strongly feel like this guy is a steady rebound because he’s much more simpy in nature (I had a few toxic traits, as did she) but I’ve been working on them. Who knows if she’ll ever reach out now.

It's been 4 and half years since my ex left, and I'm still in No Contact. So "yes", I'm a little afraid she won't reach out.

Definitely 4 or 5 months typically. It’s been 6 weeks since my breakup it ended terribly. Right now we only in contact for the sake of our child that’s it.

I am trying to go no contact and to stick to it as I messed up the other weekend and messaged her while I was drunk

Hi Coach Craig and Margaret! What if your on Smart or Strategic Contact wherein you are on constant contact with your ex? Hope you could also do a video on that... Its really hard to do no contact if that is the case...

If they wait until I have completed my grief processing. I just may be in a new place without them!

It took 6 weeks and I am now starting to hear from him, so no contact works.

How does this work with different attachment styles? My ex is fearful avoidant, so I was led to believe that there is a sweetspot during which they are in the fearful stage, and after that they go full avoidant and there's no hope. Even in the fearful phase though, that fear can prevent people from reaching out, even if they want to.

I think it’s a wrong assumption that a spouse has to show their spouse that left them without saying a word that changes have taken place because the situation that led to the other person leaving will never ever happen again.

I was listening to Fleetwood mac and got overwhelmed and broke no contact. I'm so sad.

Thank you very much 💓💓💓

when i do the no contact rule he comes back after 2 months and then do everything too get my attention and when i take him back he treat me like shit again and ignores me 😞 i cant move on because im living with toxic parents

you are both awesome

I have no more IF's cause am pretty sure am not taking HER back. We should not drink poison just because we are thirsty.

I’ve never seen an ex come back but I’ll keep doing my best in no contact. One ex I’ve been in no contact for for over a year now. Making my way to 2 years nc. She’s had 2 girlfriends since me so I’ve given up the idea of her returninf

Have faith my fellow people

He told me to move on so...

My gf ghosted me last year for 4 months. I wasn't expecting her to come back at all. I took almost a week to get back to her.

Is there any way you guys can touch on Internal No Contact and “Killing the Hope”. Very good piece of knowledge I watched about pushing the idea or Fantasy of Reconciliation out of your head like applying a tourniquet until it falls off and dies. I also would like to point out that the separation anxiety actually does feel like you’re going to die because you probably should let the part of you that anxiously needs somebody else to die. So brave it. Start your own tribe. I also made a profound realization that was simply “Don’t treat your partner like a child” so; Don’t treat them like your parents treated you or any amalgamation of that parent to child relationship on both sides. If you lean too much into that; you are projecting. They aren’t your child. They are your partner. Just some stuff I’ve picked up in my journey being a part of the Key club. (Yes I made this up since your logo is a lock and we are all our own keys to unlocking our dream relationship). Thanks for everything you guys do.

I did four months of no contact, but then I messed up because he started dating someone new and I reached out to tell him how bad I felt about the fact that he posted it on social media without considering my feelings. I know... I screw it up! Then, I blocked him from social media to avoid temptation and it has been a month since I am in no contact again. How likely is that he reaches out at some point?

What if it's the 2nd time you've broken up? We were together 3 years, split up for 10 months, and back together for a year and a half. During the past year everything was great and we didn't fight at all. The last six months snowballed until last month when we broke up again. We planned to move to another state together but I was very leary because he doesn't want to get married and drinks a lot. His best friend who also drinks a lot is getting divorced and moved back to our state and since then my ex slowly pulled away and refused to work anything out.

Broke no contact after 44 days... i did this because our relationship was only 6 months and even that was on and off a couple times. And I thought if i leave it months then she will move on and feelings will go after such a short relationship. She didnt respond, so now i dont know what to do

Full 10 months of no contact with any mistakes and she hasn’t contact me or gave me any sign 😪 Im hopeless at this point.

16 years. She had terminal cancer. I told her to focus on her kids instead of what we had.

My parent divorced in 65. They never spoke to each other ever again...

Sir. My gf need space and I don't know what does it means initially. I continuously try to reach her, beg her. And finally on Friday she said that I want peace don't call me .and don't call my friends and family also. She blocked me on social media. When ever I try to reach her. She got furious or ignore me. We have 4 year of relationship and that is long distance relationship. Tell me what to do .I don't want to loose her From India

I did it all wrong and I worked through my own process. It’d been years and he may never reach out.

I was with my ex for 1.8 years and she broke with me it’s being 1 month from the break up she was texting me daily hot/cold and I started the no contact and its being 3 days hurts a lot from getting a text daily from not even 1 Trying to getting better working out and going to therapy but need the motivation but I love her with all my heart and I’m gonna be happy if she is even if it is without me

Will it work the same as no contact if you pushed and broke your no contact? And she bocks you for a month so far? She also said no chance sver. Its been 4 months she left . Married 17 years may 5th so far no divorce papers.

4 to 5 months i have issues if I'm still caught up on my ex for that long. 1 to 3 months ok but 4to 5 why even reach out anymore

I'm two months into no contact and feel like it maybe pointless as she's working on her marriage long term.

Move on! If it’s meant to be forcing anything won’t help. If they come back it absolutely has to be their choice. And then it’s up to you whether you’d even want to take them back! (Spoiler) You won’t after you see you’re ok without them

Guys, you have for sure more than enough data to release at least a median value of reach out after no contact and some correlations to relationship issues. Run a poll on your clients!😊

My ex reached out, but I believe I messed it up and she ghosted me and is in a relationship again this is her second relationship since we broke up a year and half ago.. will she reach back out or did I mess it up for good?

We were together for 5 years. Fairly decent relationship, no fighting really. There was a lot of stress the last 2 years because we had a business fail due to covid shutdowns. So we had to go get other jobs. She broke up with me in late March. She said she fell out of love. I asked her if there was someone else and she said no. 2 weeks later when I moved out the new love took my place. So I think she had some grass is greener syndrome. Obviously been setting it up before she got rid of me. I went into NC. A month later I had to go back to the house to sell a van I had there. I told her I was coming and told her I would be there at a time when she should have been at work. I got there and she was there and her new love's car was parked purposely right next to the van I was selling even though there were a couple of parking spaces right up next to the house. I didn't see them or talk to them. I sold the van and left. She texted a couple of hours later saying thanks for getting rid of the van and I said no problem. Went back into NC. On day 75 of this second no contact period she sent me a text saying that she was cleaning out the garage and wondered what to do with my bowling ball. The bowling ball that has sat in the garage since I moved in 5 years ago. I never used it. It was right out in the open for the last 5 years. She has to know I didn't forget it. I left other junk I didn't want there. I told her to just toss it and she said ok. Is it possible this was an indirect direct? I don't know what has been happening with her. I haven't stalked her social media. She has just really got me confused. I don't know what is going on in her head.

Please can you do a video on how to reconnect with an ex from the dumpers perspective. It’s been 3m no contact he’s avoidant, I’m anxious and I’d like to see if there could be another chance for us but I don’t know how to approach him, my fear of rejection is stopping me reaching out. Thx x

Ehat about this situation. I know she was talking to the new guy a few weeks before we split up. I been gone for around 5 weeks. I knew she couldn't pay for her apartment after I left. So she has already moved in with her new bf. I think is good in some ways. Because when the new wears off. I feel she will know she made a mistake. Maybe! We had an 8 yr relationship share one child. She had one. I had the issues. From parents passing at young age. Another ex cheated on me! So I had issues that I need to fix. But I know I'm the better man if. If I can fix my separation abandonment issues. Trust issues!!!! But what do you think about this new relationship. And how early they have moved in together. I do know she has to have some attachment style. She can't stand to be alone. She has to have someone in her life always.

It's been 4 years and my ex has not reached out. I don't care though as I'm dating others who are much better people than my ex lol

I beleave 6 months is enough im in long distance brake up with a invodent 7 brake ups i begged i am going to her country in 4 months if she is with some one else i can move on i beleave after 6 months of no contact move on but if you do change everything its not fair on the new person if they do come back so if they dont miss and want to fix it after 6 months its time to move on .....its hard in long distance as you dont know if she is with anyone if i knew she was i would never go back ...

At what point would that be considered as wishful thinking though? Wouldn't it be easier for dumpees to assume they will never hear from their exes? So in that sense, the work they do on themselves is driven by their motivation to improve themselves for themselves rather than to improve for their exes. Please share your thoughts coach.

6 months ago today, the breakup was happening. I worked a lot on myself and became stronger, more independent, and fullfilled a lot of my wishes (travelling alone, hiking, ) Still miss him, think about him everyday and sometimes cry too. During this 6 months not a single message from him, but a few signs (social media) that the breakup also affected him. (jealousy, online stalking etc). In these 6 months, there was my birthday, no message from him. I lost all hope that he will ever come back, but I am kind of okay now about this thought.

This is my feelings too “it feels like death!” By torture

My ex girlfriend reached out to me on my birthday, but I didn’t reply back till the next day. She only wished me happy birthday and I replied back with a thank you. I also mentioned that I hope one day we can be together again and that I’m now working on myself to be a better person. She just told me you’re welcome afterwards and that was it. I wanted to say more in the message, but I had to remember what Coach Craig said about leaving the message short and to have them sit and think with the situation. With that being said, it really hurts to wait.

Ex came back after 2.5 years nc. She told me that she loved me and I was her soulmate but she just wanted to be friends. I said no to friendship and that I wanted more. Then starts dating a new guy a month later. Can't win. Back in nc.

But if someone really loved you, could they stay away for months?! Even if you hear from them there’s no guarantee they’ll get back with you. So the odds are not good you’ll reunite.

"there are going to be times that your ex is afraid of losing you..." why? they broke up with me?

Craig my ex broke up with me 2 weeks after she was sexually assaulted because she “lost feelings”. It’s now been 4 months and she’s an avoidant. What can I do?

I'm in no contact with every eligible women on earth.

They did not reach out but I am so glad. It has been well over 2 years lol

Ive been in no contact for 8 months im over her already......if any woman wanna talk lmk

My ex got engaged to someone else after 1 year of relationship… Is it over lol? No contact is done?

At this point.. im afraid she will 🤨

Can they come back after 6 months?

My ex hasn't reached out to me since 2021

Just because most of the comments state that they never got back with their ex. The ones that did aren't going to be on here making comments.

Does keeping social media private increase chances of no contact? Or does it matter? It's been 2 years, my Instagram is public he didn't block me on Instagram but he blocked me on fb. I am in a different state for the summer and posting on Instagram and I think he's been noticing because he suddenly unblocked me on fb. I am wondering if it's because he wanted to see if I moved. I keep my location private on fb so unblocking me doesn't answer his questions if that's what he's wondering. When he unblocked me it was also our 2 year separation time so he may of seen a photo pull up on memories that caused him to remember me idk. He left me for another girl and they are still together but I can't imagine they are happy. They have both gained 100 lbs each so I assume they are stressing each other out.

Instant classic

Thanks

What if we’ve been in contact the whole time and it’s been 6 months?