Has No Contact Not Worked If Your Ex Hasn't Contacted You? 

They‘re right! Do the work guys. When my ex reached out I wasn‘t ready at all and things went south during our conversation. I blew my chance because all I did the first 4 months of NC was reminiscing about the past, blaming myself for the mistakes etc. Don't be like me guys. Shifting the focus from them to you IS the best strategy.

Rest in Peace Margaret thankyou from all of us 🌹🌹🌹

The harsh reality is that if you never hear from them again, then it didn't mean much. Tough but just gotta accept it.

“Every notification on your phone could be your ex”… Solution is to set a special text tone and ringtone for that person in your contacts. If you don’t hear that specific tone, it’s not them. It will ease a lot of stress and dread.

Its difficult when people don’t want to work at relationships - and just see that the ‘grass is greener’ I spent 4 years with someone that just ditched me by text in the end.

Been 15 months since my breakup. Contacted one time by her to say happy birthday 3 months after the breakup with a Happy Birthday! Hope you have an incredible day and doing well! I replied with a Thank you, hope you are doing well too. Have not heard from her ever since, and have not once reached out to her in any way. Had to delete her from social media just to finally move on.

We have no idea what is really going on on the other side after a break up! After several months life has really changed both ways and most of the emotion is gone. No contact again is for personal healing almost entirely! Everything takes as long as it takes, but for me over 90 days for most of the pain to be gone. Once someone is in your past and you’re not putting any energy into it or have expectations of the outcome, the world starts opening up again. You find yourself again as we tend to lose ourselves in intimate relationships.

for me it felt like someone ripped my heart out but sometimes we just gotta move on

That was peaceful and kind. Thank you, the 3 of you ❤️

You're right. Sometimes doom feels "better" than the reality of the sheer unknown. It doesn't help people in my life are telling me he's over me etc. I am doing the work but I'm in so much pain it feels like running a marathon with a shattered leg. I won't give up.

Have a quick story, one of my best friends told me this weekend that his ex from 9 years ago texted him out of the blue recently about the Rangers when they were in the playoffs for hockey. They hadn’t spoken in 9 years and she texted him. He didn’t reply because he’s moved on and is in a new relationship but still thought this would be relevant to share.

No contact's working perfectly if you're using it to make personal growth a priority.

No contact is really to respect you. To build yourself back up and get to a much better place. If they chose to break up with you that’s there loss and you must keep this abundance mindset as hanging around and still being in contact with someone who’s completely rejected you won’t allow the growth you need. I dated the most toxic person of my entire life two years ago and although she broke up with me it saved me doing it. She was an emotionally damaged individual had lied and fabricated the truth over so many aspects that there was no relationship to be had. She clearly needed help. I pretty much went no contact and cut her off out of feeling disgusted with the fraud herself and plus I knew the work that was needed. Now I couldn’t care less if she tried to contact me or not, but she will be going on about me like she did with every ex blaming them for all her misfortunes in life. That I’m certain of. It’s a cycle they go through and she moves from relationship to relationship with a extremely poor mindset that the next partner can soothe her and fix her until he slights her. The sad thing is I really don’t think she has the capability to ever be self aware of the destruction she causes. So she will continue abusing every person that enters her life. I don’t need that nor does anyone else I have a life to live.

Of course NC is working. The issue with NC is that your ex will contact you when you've moved on and want nothing to do with them anymore 😅

It works guys . This is coming from someone that thought it doesn’t work, ( I was depressed for 4 months ) guess what ? he is a soccer player , u Would think with all his options and money, he wouldn’t reach back, but he contacted after 18 months . But I noticed it was when I stopped hoping , when I started doing better for me, not for revenge . But honestly they don’t deserve a second chance same shit u are going to experience. Move on with your lives. We want them back for ego boost not necessarily love . It’s your love that makes them special . What’s for you won’t miss u. Trust me I was like u guys in 2019 watching all the no contact videos, all the strategies. Lol. Face the pain of them gone , it gets better each day Trust me. One day u will realize, u dint think of them anymore . NB : I’m a medical doctor so let me tell u this , from the medical view, all the anxiety and feelings of u can’t live without them is due to the fact that, they stimulated release of happy hormones and your Brain is used to it, so when they are no longer there , your brain attempts to release these hormones, just like withdrawals it’s worse in the beginning, but gets better with time. This video just popped up and I decided to drop these for those people watching all these videos. Please try and know when to stop watching them too. They keep the hope alive . Hope is good, but knowing when not to have it it’s best . ✌️

Im literally on a year today from the breakup. Very similar situation where they havent reached out and ive grown but time to time i get upset still. i feel like im still not where i need to be. Fighting everyday to become a better man. Thank you coaches!

Four years after separating my ex and i have managed to come very close without returning because we both love our daughter and like this we can provide her with as much familial safety as we can. A lot has had to do with personal growth on my side, by identifying my abandonement issues, my lack of empathy and so on. Slowly we are becoming something that resembles the family we once wanted. For the first time in all these years we look together to the future. So hang in there and make the work. You will not miss on that.

Thanks again for a great video! I only hope the people actually learn instead of just listen. I am the dumper if you want to call it that. I was Fed Up with the boundary breaking, childish behavior and poor emotional navigation skills so I called it quits. After sharing everyone of your videos and buying your book set he's still doesn't get it! 5 days ago he finally stopped texting and calling my blocked number dozens of times a day.. coming to my house and leaving flowers and handwritten notes Kenneth🙄 I do think about him, he has some very good qualities it's just unfortunate that my priorities are my boundaries not a nice dinner. Perhaps when the anger fades I will reach out to him and see if he has changed at all and if not I will move on permanently..

They really are speaking truth about focusing on personal growth, I’ve made a lot of progress and I’m finding myself again, I don’t mind so much not hearing from her, but it still stings a little. I’ve been talking to and dating other people, but I’m quite comfortable with what I have going on

Let go of hope. Then you are indifferent and good either way. Work on yourself and don’t stop living life. No one but you should have power over your life.

Awesome trio team..

But thank you for the videos. Sincerely.

I honestly love Coach Margaret😂❤

Was in NC again, and she (dumper) messaged me of a photo of me, no text, just the photo. Was a photo of me that she took quite a while ago and it was her favourite photo of me as I looked genuinely happy. I had asked for the photo before we actually broke up like a month ago. So why has she sent it now? Confused.

I think aboutmy list and how he cared so little for me never taking any interest or questions about my background, likes, dislikes ,family it was always about him I could write a book on him He could not write a paragraph about me sad.....enjoy watching you all three like good friends

Most needed video plz can you make a video on aftr seperation from partner or boyfried or girlfriend can we go into a healthy relationshp

@Coach Craig Kenneth…my relationship was 6months long but intense, was it long enough for bonding/attachment to occur?

I felt exactly the same when he changed his picture on Instagram! I felt sad because I took it as a signal that he was moving on.!

The truth is, they really don‘t care enough and they feel relieved after they brake up. Going to no contact is for you ONLY to heal and have some self respect. But for them it‘s just right and a good feeling that you make it so easy for them without any drama.

Been two years since we've seen each other and talked, and one year since I last heard from him by email. Unfortunately I feel in my heart that he's completely moved on. Number one mistake I made was reaching out for two years with a lot of emails and they were not kind. I went to the lowest of low the thing's I wrote to him by emails..blaming him for everything He did wrong. I wish I started the no contact right after the break up.. it's SO important. I lost my dignity with him by the barrage of messages, some were kind but most weren't..alot of back and forth of raw emotions. I'll always love him and that's ok, I just can't reach out anymore. But, I am not going to wait for him. I haven't reached out for four months now. It's been two years post breakup, duh it's over. Working on the new me now. I've accepted where I went wrong but unfortunately he probably never will take on responsibility for his damage. I'm finally ready to date now.. it's time! Ps we were together off and on for four years.

i was dumped after 8 yrs in a relationship. NC preserve my value from down grading further, my ex contacted me twice but i didnt reply bec before those attempts, ive informed by someone that she is in a new relationship. so even if i love still my ex, i respect all the situations and myself for not letting myself to be part of her present. it's been a year now but im still thriving to fix myself.

It’s so hard for me now, because I’m starting to see someone three weeks ago when I wasn’t ready because my breakup was just 7 weeks ago. (I hadn’t planned this, she’s the former student of one of my sisters friends) We had a bbq at the family house and we were starting to say grace when I went in between my nephew and the girl to hold hands. I thought we were going to hold hands like how people do a handshake, but she ended up interlocking with my fingers and my eyes opened up wide. All I could hear was my ex girlfriend’s voice telling me couples do that when they’re intimate with each other, because that’s what she had taught me and she wanted me to be dominant over her, so she would always have me put my hand on top of hers, but the girl’s hand was on top of mine. After saying grace, I walked away and started to tear up. After the party and everyone had left, I just broke down and cried, cried my eyes out for almost five minutes.

No contact is like a Test to reveal if he/she is the right one for you.. im a huge believer of "if it's meant to be, it'll be 💗 im on my 2 weeks of no contact and im in great pain ... But if hes really for me he'll extend himself to me . If not ? Its okay... Hes not the one then..

Thanks for this video.

If you go no contact you have to be prepared to have no contact. Don't play games.

Could you please consider a video of when you are on contact with your ex and it’s a LDR and the communication is great and meaningful but they take a long time to get back in touch with you It’s vey confusing and somewhat annoying Thanks

Lol the stalking part made me laugh so hard!

Best part 18:50 . Been victim of this manipulation but no more . Boundaries are set.

Was 11 months of NC with my DA ex when I got an email from her. Things were great for two weeks and then back to her pulling back a little. I'm ok with whatever happens, don't have expectations it's going to workout but we'll see.

Yes, NC is the way but it’s been mentioned every relationship is different. There has not been much discussion from Ken about people who are married. Especially discussing long-term partnerships. Maybe my story is not as common compared with a non-married relationship under a few years. I'd be curious to know what are the demographics of who you see and talk to. We were together for almost 13 years and interesting enough, got married two years ago. Also to know note... I'm 66 and she is 62. The hardest part for me is having someone just fracture our marriage vows the way she did. Of course, there were problems, but all she had to do was communicate to me that she wanted to take a break and I would’ve agreed. I came home almost 3 months ago and her computer and all her clothes were gone… No note, nothing but left her wedding band on the table. She has never been one to initiate anything in our relationship but how long do you wait? Fortunately, there’s not much to split up but at some point being married needs to be addressed. Initially, I was super upset about how she handled the breakup and sent her a few emails voicing everything I needed to say. Now just waiting and working on myself. We have not spoken since and can’t tell you how difficult this has been.

These videos are very helpful thank you. It's horrid to admit my ex was right to leave. I'm a great person but I'm trying to leave a difficult family situation and I'm very scared because they're abusive. That makes abandonment for me really hard because I'm being left in a harmful situation. I'm craving belonging and help and that's too much for a partner especially one who's already avoidant. To my credit I've let him go but I'm still sad about it and I still miss him everyday two years later. It was a strong bond I've never had before and I fear I may never have again because I'm 50 now. I loved him so much I've seen what's right for him and let him leave and gone no contact and he hasn't come back. But on bad days I still feel distraught over it.

As I'm listening to this she reached out and said "Good morning"

Can you make a video about your success stories. Did you ever get an ex back

My ex broke up with me back in October and been in no contact since. She blocked me from Instagram and as a contact but still follows my brother, my grandma, and aunt on Facebook still

Margaret is awesome

I am almost 11 months into no contact, did the workbooks twice, read a ton of books, did a journal every day... But I am still in that cycle of being hopeful-okay and being desperate and lethally depressed. I am guilty of almost all of the mindfucks you speak about in this video, except the torture and the jealousy one.

I'm definitely not waiting for him. I've been working on myself for the past 2 years so hopefully I'm ready. I am being optimistic but at this point I don't care technically if he comes back. I've found many people along the way and know there is someone better if he can't be that better person. I'm staying optimistic but don't care either way. He recently unblocked me after 2 years of no contact. I had been initially angry but quit contacting after 2 days of the break up so I think it was soon enough after that it didn't carry on too long.

My Ex did contact me. After 3 years. But all she told me was she was moving to another state with her bf. So I don't think it worked for me.

I saw your video of why they don't like you. Could be they just don't want to be with you anymore. Don't stay stuck...

In no contact for over a year and broke it, guess what she blocked me. STAY IN NO CONTACT. Trust me it will only hurt.

Use no contact for your own self healing. Not in an effort to get another person back

Craig / Margaret / Victoria, what is the “end of the no contact journey?”

I'm almost 2 months through. I made mistakes due to him being a DA. I am doi ng a lot of work on myself hoping some day he will reckon that

Ex deleted my number, can't see her stories noh can she see mine. She didn't block me. Thats enough for me! Healing. Life goes on!

I’ve been in no contact for One year and one month 😂😂 I dont care if they reach out or not anymore.

Nearly 45 days NC, we had a magical 10 months together, and yes, I am moving forward, but I miss her company and intimacy more intensely everyday 😢

A little under 1 year, we somehow match on dating website (I don’t recall seeing her on the site) and she messages me first. Not sure how to respond. But I am very surprised

I need to do this how can you help me out.

Ahh. Breakups. So painful when they happen yet I can laugh at how silly I was being once they’re in the past.

My avoidant ex broke up with me because she lost feelings for me. In the relationship she told me that my anxious attachment had to change. After she broke up with me she contacted a few times and we're still playing a game together with mutual friends. Yesterday she said she was sad that I don't contact her anymore. I don't know whether this was sarcastic or not because she used to talk like that before we got into the relationship and masked it with the same sarcastic humour.

Me & My Ex been together for 3 years..But every time we get into a disagreement, she gets upset and want to break up. She doesn't take criticism well and she has a bad attitude and she also doesn't communicate well. But I love her, I went into No contact for two weeks and I broke it by texting her to see how she was doing..But she ignored me. So I went back to No Contact and it only been a week..I don't think she's gonna reach out to me

Don’t know if I should be watching these videos because this is the second time we broke up. First time we broke up I watched all these videos and he came back. Now idk if I should even wonder if he’ll come back this time

Just to summarize it, i dated a woman for 6 years, after the initial breakup she never contacted me, after a certain point I did not wanted her anymore, almost a year and half, she tried many ways to contact me, i just ignore her, even in my birthday i only say thank you, nothing else, because when you truly move on they tried to contact you.

You know how you told people to comment if their ex calls watching this video? Just hours after watching this video mine called me. We’ve been almost 3 weeks no contact. I couldn’t believe it.

He told me he dont want to be attached to anyone at the time.. So he want to be by himself...

Coach craig I'm trying to purchase a 1 on 1 with Coach Victoria but it's not working..

Margaret always knows what to say

She just texted asking to come get her stuff without me there. Asked me to stay at my parents for 3 weeks as we own the house together. Not sure how to reply.

What about a long distance relationship, she never said it over or she needs her space ??

My ex reached out after she dumped me initially but she texted me to make me jealous and hurt me intentionally so I got pissed at her and tell her stop doing this bullshit , she said okay. Even after that she reached out weirdly just to check whether I blocked her or not. And constant blocking unblocking blocking from her during no contact. Been 2 months of NC now after some drama . Confusing ex tbh

Not for nothing I've always done the no contact naturally. Once I get dumped I move on never looking back. Now this time is different because I've attached to the kids. I was raising them as mine up till recently. I decided to go my own way because she want to start introducing men she dealing with to the kids. So I respect her choices hope it work out but it hurts walking away from the kids I care about.

Well my ex came around to reveal she has a bf since finding that out 3+ weeks NC and she msg my bestfriend saturday asking her to go out. Keep in mind my ex hated my best friend she was jealous of her.. My ex texted her, I only removed u from social media because of “my name” and yeah we had talked recently but nothing that good.. But yep some odd situation

Do they comeback twice? Let’s say I reached out the first time and it didn’t work out lol

I’m done with my ex logged I out of apps we speak on it’s been 9 days of no contact I’m feel better already still hurts but I’m healing slowly I’m taking it day by day 😊😊😊

My EX left me 60 days ago in the first 30days she blocked me from texting her in last 30 days she unblocked me from texting. I didn't know and send her text with a song, but no response. What does this mean? Should I reach out?

Craig, my ex broke up with me almost two months ago and she escalated the situation I reacted with anger. She blocked me and I apologized a few days later and recently she hearted my apology and unblocked me (a month later). Im so confused right now.

I had a short but really intense relationship ( 7 months ) and guess what? ... after 7 years out of the blue she wrote me and then we met again. We hanged out for few evenings, going dancing and having fun and I kissed her again. My life changed a lot and since 8 years I'm leaving abroad ( 6 hours from her ) so there was no really expectations from my side. After the kiss I had to leave to go back to my place in Switzerland and she told me: " I'm happy that I have the confirmation that you still like me". Weird no? .... she wanted just to have a confirmation/validation after 7 years. Anyway I left and I never reached out anymore.it Was and is irrelevant from the point in life I'm.

I was not able to find an email on your website to send you my success story.

she asked for space and time. Our Story is a little weird...we were best friends for years...but all of a sudden we became more for 8 Months despite her having a Bf. she said her relationship is Not goin well... but she was unsure whether or Not she is able to leave him... we tried being Friends again...but Our feelings got in the way again... so we agreed on space and time. but after a month of Radio silence she used my bday to reestablish contact and sent me a Long Message .asked me how i am and If i wanna let her know Blabla. i was overwhelmed and Just told her politely "thanks for your Message " . No reply though . what should i do?

I wish if I didn’t hade a heart to love last time I saw her she killed me and since that day my world became without colors 🖤

My ex blocked me during no contact

What if you’re both doing no contact??

Stay in no contact. I broke it and let him back in. Now he has moved to a different country and told me have a nice life and he doesn’t want to be friends.

No contact is a hope strategy that really only sets you up for disappointment. It's a hope strategy for people with no self-worth. If you value yourself, why do you care so much about your ex? If you have self-esteem, you don't care if the ex left you or ghosted you. THEY lost YOU, not the other way around. "No contact" should really be renamed / reframed to "move on".

Yea unless you work with that person in a restaurant and are in constant contact with them during a shift. I need that video for real. No one has that. Not Coach Lee, The Love Chat, nobody. How do you maneuver that?

Hi, I’m 26 days in no contact and found out that my ex’s girlfriends cat died a couple of days ago. Should I reach out and send my condolences, or stay in no contact?

"Is no contact working if there is no contact?" I would say it is

today my ex got married to someone else :) Truth hurts really bad

Problem is 9’ Out of 10’shes with someone new like my situation so why would she reach out

I was the dumper, then i realised i made a huge misstake. I wrote her a email with apologies. But she told me its not the same feeling anymore. I was texting and begging and she started to ignore me. I started NC and she reached out to me after 3 days, now she is texting and calling me every day. Sending me pictures from trips we made together. We where 3 years together. I know she still loves me and i feel a good vibe. I feel she is moving towards me but not sure she just wants to keep me close and move on in silence. Coaches?

Politics broke us up, so I am not holding my breath for her to reach out, she probably honestly believes she's better off, even though I did everything I feel a man should do in a relationship,

Why do we love people who abuse us?

for those who are really struggling, this might sound a bit woo, but there is a cool technique called emotional freedom technique, it involves tapping on the acupuncture meridian points to release emotions, it takes a few mins, look up Tapping for Rejection and Abandonment - EFT with Brad Yates

A year since the break up I'm still struggling and she's dating someone else 😭

It's been 6 years! Yeah, I think it's done dude....lol.

My Ex left me 5 months ago, did the usual begging and pleading at the beginning, then went NC. She then reached out and said about talking as friends (she was in a rebound relationship at this point) I kinda agreed knowing it wasn’t what I wanted. We talked almost everyday but always one sided by her, we met up a few times and it felt like normal even though I knew it wasn’t. Her rebound broke up with her as she tried to force the relationship, though this was a good sign but she’s been so hung up on him after 3 months rather than us of 10 years. I guess this is because he ended it rather than her ending it. We talked over Christmas but she said that she knew the reason she wanted to come home but i wasn’t going to like it. I had enough because I felt so upset on Christmas Day from missing her and her family if I’m being honest. I told her I didn’t want to hear about it because he left her and just because he was back for the holidays didn’t mean he’d want to see you. She didn’t like this and said then we have nothing to talk about then blocked me. I’m now unblocked but haven’t herd anything so back in NC I really don’t know what to do, I know i need to move forward but after all this time I’m just so lost

I've had many girlfriends over the years. None have ever come back, and one got married. I've always worked on myself, have a new career, and really happy with who I am. They all had major insecurities I came to find out and never expect any of them back. If they ever do, I don't know what I'll do because I never think about them and have totally moved on. I have no contact with them and don't know where they are. No contact absolutely can mean they will never come back, but I'm a way better person now than I was with them, so if they really can sense I've moved on, they will see I'm better now. But I never plan or hope for their return. I've learned to screen the very person they hid from me, so why would I long for them to come back?

Or their ex is just living..it’s not all about us..they left you (I’m in the midst of my girlfriend having broke up with me)they decided to move on..

It`s been six weeks since she dumped me and she hasn`t reached out, but she likes my storys on Facebook. I`m still hurting and misses her like hell, but I don`t see her reaching out anymore. And she`s an avoidant as well with bipolar disorder..She has broken up with me two times before and reached out within 2 weeks telling me that she waited for ME to reach out and that she wanted to be pursued. I bet she`s waiting for me to reach out since I have my boat and much stuff lying around at her place, but that won`t happen cause I`m not ready to pick up my stuff, netiher to see her. I haven`t managed to work hard enough on myself either, so the time aint right for ME. Do anyone think she will reach out?

On the 29th of this month will have been 3 years since we last talked. She never came back. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭