Aladdin and Paige wish a bunch of historical figures into worse people while trying to make greedy wishes in one of the worst excuses for an animated movie. Originally Released: September 28, 2013 www.phelous.com / phelous
+David Sparling What about the part where, while getting a lamp in the Titanic, they wish up an iceberg to "stop" the ship?Or when they mess up John Wilkes Booth's acting performance at a production at Ford's Theater, then the angered Booth chases them with a gun, but they disappear before he could shoot them, and the bullet hits Lincoln instead.
Paige: But you're so skinny Paige I don't know if you're actually taking the time to read books but if you are then you should know that in his younger days Henry VIII was an avid sportsman, who loved Hunting, Archery, Wrestling, Tennis, and above all Jousting and it wasn't until he was crippled in a jousting accident which aggravated ulcers on his legs caused by his garters and affected his mental health, that he began to binge eat because he was no longer able to do the sports he loved
no, no, no, he was skinny because he never ate due to the stress of ruling and only became fat because it was forced upon him by a couple time-traveling asshats. Just like Blackbeard wasn't a criminal with a flair for the dramatic, he was a coward with blond hair until the TOTALLY REAL PIRATE Long John Silver threatened his boat while Aladdin was on it, and the idiot forced him to become evil. Or Cleopatra was a fat (but not actually ugly in my opinion) sweetheart who could never find love until Aladdin decided outward beauty was more important and made her totally aware that her actions in the future would bring the end to one of the greatest empires of all time. I think Roger Coreman may have been the one to never read a book in his life, actually.
snakes3425 Wow what a very informative comment that not only gives an interesting tidbit of history regarding a European ruler but also point out the utter bullshit of the movie’s intentional innacuracies just for the sake of a forced joke.
Cleopatra: My father was a king among men, and you squashed him like a beetle. What have you got to say for yourselves? Robin: Your father the king among men was your father?
@@gracekim25 According to Cassius Dios, Cleopatra tried to seduce Octavian (better known as Emperor Augustus), as she had earlier done with Caesar and Antony. Or are you asking about Robin? If that's the case, watch Phelous' video about "Lion and the king". Then you get to know Robin.
Did these people not realize that Henry VIII was pretty much his era's equivalent of a jock? He only ended up putting on the pounds after a jousting accident.
I'm pretty sure Page and Aladdin caused the jousting accident (it's on Page 95 of most histories of Henry VIII, in fine print, under a flap, in Elvish translated from Russian)
Fun fact: Captain William 'Blackbeard' Teach was not named for having both black hair and a beard. Believe it or not, something that obvious and common has never been grounds for a nickname. He gained the name 'Blackbeard' by adopting a strange personal ritual whenever his crew would board a ship: he tied lengths of cannon-fuses into his beard, and lit them, so the defending sailors would see his face wreathed in smoke and flame.
Straight off of Wikipedia: “ his nickname derived from his thick black beard and fearsome appearance.” He did tie canon fuses into his hair, but didn’t light them.
This myth of the cannon wicks has currently been debunked as there is no historical evidence of Blackbeard tying fuses to his beard. The myth was completely made up by author Charles Johnson in his frequently debunked book on piracy and there is no other mention of it in any accounts of people who knew, fought with, or had any interaction with Blackbeard.
Here is my idea for how to improve this movie: The movie starts with Paige walking home from school. She sees Allen getting bullied. Paige wants to help him, but she is too shy. That night, she reads the story of Aladdin. We then learn that just before he died, the sorcerer corrupted the queen to get revenge on Aladdin for thwarting his plans. The queen then uses the Sands of Time to warp the magic lamp into the future. Paige discovers the lamp and states that she wishes she knows where it came from. She then sees Aladdin about to be executed and cries that she wishes she can save him. This causes Aladdin to be warped into Paige's time. Aladdin explains the situation to Paige. Paige was about to use the lamp's magic to return the queen to normal when the queen shows up and warps the lamp to a different time period but not before Paige breaks the Sands of Time hourglass in half. Throughout the movie, Aladdin and Paige go through different time periods. The presence of the lamp in each of the time periods causes history to change for the worse. Aladdin and Paige use the lamp to change it back. During their journey, Paige learns to be assertive. In the movie's climax, the queen uses the lamp's magic to kill Aladdin and destroy the lamp. Paige uses the last remaining grains of the Sands of Time to obtain the lamp before the queen can use it. She then uses the lamp's magic to undo the sorcerer's spell on the queen making her kind and benevolent once again. Paige then wakes up and discovers that the adventure was just a dream. She then heads off for school and sees Allen getting bullied again. This time, she stands up to him. Paige then realizes that Allen looks a lot like Aladdin. The movie ends with Paige and Allen walking to school together.
Cleopatra VIII wasn't considered physically attractive. (The inbreeding probably didn't help in that respect.) Her appeal was in her intelligence and charisma.
It was said she knew over seven different languages and knew the art of history, diplomacy and cultural awareness. She knew things that most women of that time weren't allowed to know, such as law and politics. She did manage to create the library of Alexandra. O_O Her military knowledge made Roman men like Julius Caesar and Mark Anthony weak. If it weren't for the invasions we would be so advance as a species with that library still being in use and opened to everyone during the "Dark Ages."
Wasn’t she Greek? So no inbreeding involved. And if I recall correctly, she was known for her beauty as well as her intelligence. She was a pretty cruel woman though. You didn’t want to be her child
Cleopatra: "You guys just killed my dad, what do have to say for yourselves?"😡 Aladdin: "Well you know what they say, you can't spell slaughter without laughter!"😂
+Edgar Allan Poe And the Titanic had Mexican Mice and a rapping dog on it. Just kidding, the real story of the Titanic had other racist singing protocaling mice, evil whalers, talking dogs and dolphins that you can talk to through moonbeam magic, prison sharks, a giant talking octopus with a puppydog's face, and nobody died at all on the Titanic. But wait, there's more ! That piece of history was followed with a rapping prison shark and his clam posse, the city of ATLANTIS where everything moves, lives, and thinks, a bouncing fish that plays techno rave music, a cross between an otter and stingray, a red dolphin, a moving stone chair, the king of Atlantis's face was never shown for no reason, screwdrivers were banned yet a living one showed up with one of the characters for no reason, an elixir of life that helps people breathe underwater, evil rats who want to take the elixir and rule the world, and the Titanic gets rebuilt after the Atlantians and a dog with a laser gun and a Scottish toy that was cursed when a little girl simply put makeup and a wig on it, but then took off the wig like it was nothing just seconds later and fired a cannon destroying something and then played bagpipes fight off the sharks and mice that stole a fake elixir of life that they made yet they go and chase after them anyway. Which later all the mice get committed to a mental asylum forever and the good guys all cheer about it.
I love how they could've easily wished for King Henry the 8th to just try and like the food or for the intruders on the ship to retreat, but instead just thought, "Now, how can we screw people over?"
22:56 - And so, Paige and the literate Aladdin-clone happily walked off to the library, which was run by I.M. Meen. They were never seen again. The End.
That's literally what it is. Right down to the "main character is a nerd who reads and has no friends except for Aladdin." I'd say she's a Mary Sue too but she isn't. She causes far too much destruction to be considered a "perfect character who never does anything wrong," like you usually see in these kinds of fanfictions.
So what have we learned from this movie? -It's OK to mold people's Personalities to fit your standards, even if it mean's making them into irredeemable jerks in the long run. -Time travel has No negative consequences, So feel free to Alter the timeline and mess with history as you please because It's not like the Space time continuum is affected by it or anything! So Go ahead and F with the Timeline because when you return to the Present Everything will be Normal!(Except the possibility that The world is dominated by Animal-people or a Fascist dictator that is worst Than Hitler, Stalin, Mao Zedong , Kim Jong Un, and Bin Laden combined.) -And the Best one of all: If someone is a jerk to you, Be a bigger Jerk back! Don't you love these Great morals?
+TheArceusftw Either that or it confirms the predestination paradox of time travel and Aladdin and Paige were destined to go back and create the version of history we know now.
+Sage Serendipity that means they also created Adolf hitler!O.O and they also made the corrupt imperial Japanese military giving them insane ideas to attack they're neighboring Asian countries and also to attack pearl harbor.Gaaaasp they also had something to do with the titanic tragedy and 9/11and the bombings of Nagasaki and hiroshima!
(After arriving on the Western Front) Aladdin: What is this place? Paige: Don't know but it's awfully muddy Me (as shells explode all around): OH GREAT YOU JUST TOOK BACK TO THE MIDDLE OF WORLD WAR I.
Then they run into a kind young man named Adolf Hitler who’s just an innocent man trying to fight for Germany as he’s a patriot of Germany and they decide to wish him into a violent anti-Semitic asshole
So what is the body count here? They've killed Pharaoh Ptolemy XII Auletes, Icarus, everyone Edward "Blackbeard" Teach killed during his time as a pirate, all the wives Henry VIII had executed... am I missing anyone?
What about the hundreds Henry VIII either had executed, or died in his warmongering? And they may also have caused him to lose his temper with the Pope, leading to the founding of the Church of England, leading to five hundred years of religious persecution in Britain. Also Henry himself, because he died from gout caused by overeating.
I'm pretty sure we can add the people in the Great Plague and Fire of London, the Sinking of the Titanic, the two World Wars, 9/11, The American Civil War, the Thirty Years War, the Taiping Rebellion, the Boxer Rebellion, Vietnam, and the Black Death to the list
It wasn't an insult. It was a snarky remark because she felt inferior in comparison. Like pretending to be unimpressed because you don't like how much attention the other person is getting.
I'm quite sure that the historic Cleopatra was neither especially beautiful nor especially ugly, wonder if someday someone will bother trying to get it right.
She was known to be highly intelligent. She knew over eight different languages and was well known strategist. There was a reason why she seduced military men of high ranked position easily everywhere she went. It wasn't her looks, but her smarts.
Eh, the coins show someone who was pretty average looking. Big nose. curly hair. Pretty much standard for her family. But they can't have a girl be powerful because she's smart, determined, charming and ruthless. It has to be a femme fatale!
Yanno what's even WORSE with the King Henry bit? They had to run away *ANYWAY* when the purpose of wishing the poor bastard an eating disorder was made with the intent NOT to have to run away. Horrible, horrible people those three...
okay so if she would actually read books she would know that henry was a big sport man in his youth and than got a wound on his leg that never really healed which prevented him from his sport hobbies and than he got fat and sad. so what exactly is she doing with those books since she clearly isnt reading them.
Funny thing about King Henry the VIII, he wasn’t always overweight, he was active until he had a injury and it made him more irritable, he couldn’t be active as he was. Before, so he ate, that’s how he became overweight. Edit: he had a leg ulcer, most likely due to a jousting accident, plus he had a TBI ( traumatic brain injury) as well. Not excusing what King Henry the 8 did, but these conditions were not known while he was alive. Historians and doctors assumed this what king Henry may have had.
When they are looking at the pictures of Blackbeard and King Henry VIII, the text on the left part of the book doesn't change. Even after the pages are turned. FIVE YEARS IN THE MAKING!!
+CWDTrixie You're right. Though I must give credit to Jim Cummings (so awesome) and Scott Weigner (forgot how to spell his last name), they put every ounce of effort they could into their roles.
The character design isn't the worst I've ever seen (Though afternoon PBS cartoons blow it away), but the animation makes South Park look like a Miyazaki film.
I just realized I worked on an animated film like this. It is a series of talented, untalented, desperate, and bored people getting promises for better direction and people down the line of production from a hack producer with no clue as to how animation works.
phelous is one of the most under rated reviewers out there he is the best at what he does. This is the funniest shit on youtube blip anywhere. I give nostalgia critic credit for turning me on to this but phelous is the funniest hands down.
I love how he doesn’t comment on the fact that Aladdin knows what chocolate is, despite cocoa being native to the Americas-a place which, of course, Arabians wouldn't have known existed.
16:51 To be fair, women in ancient Egypt wore a lot of see through/really low cut tops. Some didn't even wear that much of a top at all. They didn't really mind showing a bit of their badonkers. Not that I think the people who made this movie did that kind of research! 😂 There's a 99.9% chance that it was just an animation error.
Seriously, I don't get the intent for this story. Why would the creators spend five years into making a story where the protagonists are portrayed in the worst ways possible?! Using their magic lamp to change decent people into horrid historical figures, killing people with no remorse and having one of the main heroes showing absolutely no regard for other people and act as reprehensible as possible. How can they possibly look at the script and think, "Yeah surely these three will capture the hearts of many for how endearing and memorable they are" P.s. That part when Aladdin completely screws over Paige during the Cleopatra part, DIDN'T HE ALSO HAVE A PRINCESS WAITING FOR HIM BACK AT HOME?!
Actually, Wordsworth did indeed prove the "Pen is Mightier than the Sword" as it unlike a sword, the PEN can spray INK into eyes forcing you to put down said sword or slash around blindly. Not only that, given the number of things on board a ship that you can trip on (rigging rope, barrels, someone's foot, a sword lying on the ground), being blinded by INK in your eyes is a pretty dangerous scenario on a boat at sea.
I can't help but think of ways to try and improve the story.. Like each time they try to get the lamp, they go further and further back in time, and Scherazoo steals it back, and know where they are because of the time sand. So they go further back in time, and since they retrieve the lamp at an earlier point in time, it causes a bit of a paradox. Meaning Scherabitch no longer has the lamp, meaning she need to go get it. As for tinkering with time, make it so Aladdin and Paige see things are not historically accurate, so they make small wishes to try and get history on track, but the lamp blows it out of proportion. Like for Cleopatra, she gets the "beauty on the inside" speech, but says "I just wish people could see that inner beauty of mine". And since she'd be holding the lamp for that, BOOM, Ancient Egyptian Jessica Rabbit. Although I can't think of a good way to rewrite Scherawhore.
Bit late but maybe tie her backstory into the original stories where she was a kind woman who was tortured and tormented and forced to tell the stories to an evil Sultan maybe she was nice but all those years of imprisonments made her bitter and all that hatred and anger caused her to make a bad wish on a genie she found she wishes to be free, to be powerful and to no longer feel the sadness she feels leaving her as nothing more than a ultra powerful sorceress who only feels anger, she kills the Sultan and destroys his kingdom and then plans to take over a nearby kingdom that is run by a dumb Sultan who she plans to manipulate so she can slowly take control then instead of Aladdin and Page mind raping her at the end they can just wish her to be back to normal
My idea on how to improve Scherazade is this: The evil sorcerer that Aladdin rescued the princess from possesses Scherazade to take over the kingdom and get revenge on Aladdin. However, Scherazade still has some control over her body. That would explain why she sends the lamp to different time periods instead of like, say, outer space and why she got upset when the lamp fell into the center of the Earth. In the end, Aladdin and Paige use the lamp to free Scherazade from the sorcerer's control.
Flea: Sorry I've got a little bit of a cold, could you maybe let me out of this cage so I can go home Page: Oh you poor thing, of course we'll let you out (Frees the Flea) 60% of Europe's population will soon die a horrible gruesome death as the Black Death sweeps across the continent because of Page feeling sorry for a sick flea
By the way, Walking The Plank is more of a literary invention as historically pirates didn't do this to captives as: A. Throwing them overboard or marooning them would be far simpler. B.Killing them and then disposing of the body at sea would be far simpler. C. Captives could potentially be ransomed if they were wealthy. D. Luke Skywalker walking the plank in the Sarlacc scene from Return of the Jedi proved how the Walking Plank can backfire if your captive is particularly agile (such as being a force user) and given that sailors often climbed rigging I'd imagine they might be able to pull off a similar stunt (without fictional force powers) as what happened when filming said scene. E. It just seems like such a hastle especially when at most the payoff is really anti-climatic (bound Captive walks of plank, falls in water, either struggles then drowns, drowns due to inability to swim, or attacked by a random Shark who happens to conveniently close by which seems to be the case every time said scenario appears in film except for said Sarlacc scene causes its Star Wars). F. Its unnecessarily sadistic to watch a person drown or being eaten alive! Alsothere is no guarantee the person will die as who knows maybe they get lucky & get picked up by a passing ship or they manage to take the plank with them, providing them with a potential floatation device! Also, some pirates were more bark than bite, using intimidation & fear such as Blackbeard's gimmick of tying lit fuses to his beard to make himself look like a demon from hell! In fact, he kept his blade pretty clean until the battle that resulted in his death, which was one where reality fit the fiction! Sure, pirates were criminals, yet they had pirate codes & the crews were more democratic, while navel ships of the time were draconian! Walking the plank is just a dramatic set piece born of the imagination of writers! Also since the historical Blackbeard's legend may not be close to the truth, them using the lamp like they did isn't that bad as again Blackbeard's reputation as a cutthroat may have been somewhat exaggerated!
umm, wasn't shaharazade the hero of 1,001 nights who volunteered herself to be the next betrothed to the king to try to stop him from killing his wives by telling stories??
+Phelan “Phelous” Porteous yup, I just re-watched it and realized that. Please make more of these, they're hilarious!! especially the good times/ golden films ones, I could re-watch them every day and not get bored of them!!
And apparently, the GOOD Scheherazade has volunteered to risk her life and tell the stories to the king (named Shahryār), all because of Aladdin and Paige! Because they're our HEROES! (You said it first, Phelous.)
Guanglai Kangyi, Age 15 In most movie versions, yes. In the book, Scheherazade and her sister come up with this plan because Sharyar (the sultan) was marrying one day, and beheading his wives the next day...Scheherazade decides enough is enough and tells him the stories.
"An ice age would do the trick" No it wouldn't. The (non-avian) dinosaurs died off millions of years before the last ice age. He should have said that an _asteroid_ would do the trick.
Argh, it drives me crazy, why do so many sentient books have their faces on the spines? Why not the front cover? Why do they need faces at all, why can't they just be like Tom Riddle's Diary and interact with you through writing or psychicly. Heck, I'll take the book from Care Bears!
Damian Freeman My guess is, when the books are on the shelves with the other books, it would be really sucky for them if their faces were on the covers. They'd suffocate, or basically have their faces pressed into other books' backs or butt. It would make more magical sense for the face to be IN the book, though. Maybe it's just easier to animate with the face on the spine.
Page is the Rule63'd version of Richard Tyler from Page Master and some writer shipped her with fairUse!Aladdin while they go on a PageMaster/TalesOfTime trip I do believe a faucet knocks on the door of comprehension...
Trumpeter: Presenting the Royal Family Okay: Henry VII and Elizabeth of York were dead at this point (why else is Henry VIII king?), who's that other guy, and what wife is Henry VIII on at this point or did they just forget about what he's most famous for? Other then being fat, and crazy
"MY CABBAGES!" I haven't seen Aladdin this useless since Return of Jafar. That movie had better animation, and that's really sad. Of all the crazy things Henry VIII did, they're talking about his girth? Seriously? And why is him being fat a good thing? Poor Jim. Wow. I'm not sure whether good or evil is dumber here. And now they're deliberately making Edward Teach a murderer. Oh god. Who WROTE this?! "Queen of Mean". Oh god. They're ripping off Troll in Central Park. Who DOES that?! They're making one of Don Bluth's worst movies look GOOD in comparison! And now they murder a man. Jesus. They didn't know ANYTHING about Cleopatra other than she was Egyptian, did they? WHO WROTE THIS?! That freeze-frame sums up this movie. THIS! ISN'T! HOW! YOU! DO! A! TIME! TRAVEL! STORY! Not only to dinosaurs not work that way, but glaciers, extinctions, and PLOTS don't work that way!
Wow. So Aladdin and Paige killed Icarus too because they were so annoying the he rather flew towards the sun. Nice. I'm pretty sure that there are some deleted scenes where they created the Illuminati, the KKK, changed Stalin's personality and wished Nero to go insane.
John Smith I'm not stupid and im not lazy.the illuminati is fake if it was real we would all be dead rightnow and were not dead. stop believing in stupid mark dice's b.s. it's a fact illuminati is not real.
+Jolo Lo Yes You are. You didn't do literally any research about it and don't know what you are talking about. You haven't even realized how most of the music videos, movies, tv series and animation all have satanic sign in them nor do you seem to know that they have been already find a way to control people's mind in the 60's by the Project Monarch. BTW this is OFFICIAL and you can read about it anywhere. You also take a look to MK ULTRA which is ALSO official and they released everything about it. And there is SO MUCH PROOF there are thousands of evidence that they are exist but lazy and very stupid people NEVER do any research at all just like you. BTW take a look at FReemasons and their rituals and WHO their members are. If you will still believe that the Illuminati isn't real you are either in VERY serious denial or you are VERY stupid.
This film reminds me of the MST3K film "Time Chasers" in which some moron turns a plane into a Time Machine. To quote Tom Servo when the villain of the movie gets into a shootout with US Revolutionary Minutemen with an Uzi. "So history's just circling the drain at this point I guess"
@@theivace9705 Usually when they dub it they have to sync English to the original lip flaps, I wouldn't be surprised if they just record that when they were voicing it in Japan.
@@Zxzero36Yeah, but I'm not talking about dubbing. One of the things to note about Akira was that they recorded the actors, then animated for it, which is said to have been an unusual way to do it in anime, but not in other productions. Cancelled anime Lupin the 8th has an episode animated, but not voice lines recorded for it.
+Herschal Shep But on the other hand he knew what chocolate was despite never possible tasting it before being from the Old World before they knew about the New one.
In the past many people could speak English, but couldn't read it, as we have evolved to communicate through sound, however reading is not really a natural process I don't think.
Y'know, it's the little anachronisms in this thing that really get on my nerves. Chocolate cake, which Aladdin tasted at 0:53, wasn't invented until 1886, over three centuries after King Henry the 8th died. Yes, cocoa beans had made their way to Europe during his lifetime (albeit less than two decades before his death), but the process of turning it into something resembling what we know today as chocolate wouldn't come about until the early 19th century.
Exactly. Chocolate powder didn't exist until the end of the 18th century. If Henry had ANY kind of Chocolate, it'd be hot chocolate, not any kind of solid food.
And don't get me started on their confusion of New Kingdom-at-the-latest Egypt with HELLENISTIC Egypt. I hated it in Cleopatra, I hated it in Rome Total Wars, I still hate it.
Page is supposed to be a bookworm, but her intellect is very limited (no clue who Scheehrazade or whatever spelling's right is , calling Cleopatra a goddess)
That's the thing that I don't get-Paige's interest in books NEVER pays off. She doesn't use any knowledge to her benefit. It's not like Belle in Beauty and the Beast who reads fantasy stories to get her all hyped up about adventures.
@@Tareltonlives The other confusing part is this. Typically in these types of stories, (with a main character who is a nerd who reads and has no friends because everyone's a jerk for no reason), they at least TELL you what kind of stories they read. But unlike with Belle, it NEVER says if she prefers fiction or nonfiction books. It just says she reads a lot. So they never have to tell you if it's in character for her to know any of this stuff, because they never established it. She's a boring blank slate who reads, just in general, not even as a hobby, it's her only character trait and they couldn't be bothered to expand upon it.
In Scheharazade's (sp?) original Arabian Nights story she was married to a king who wanted to murder her, but she kept tell him stories that ended on a cliffhanger so he'd spare her life. It seems both douchey and baffling that they turned her into a cackling, one-note villain. I don't get it.
Why is the cook they meet in Henry VIII's England putting chocolate into a cake? To people from the 16th century, "chocolate" was a drink made from cacao beans and sweetener. Solid chocolate didn't even exist *as a concept* until the 1800s!
It occurs to me that the pharaoh sentenced that man to a lifetime inside the sphinx. The sphinx which, minutes later, is revealed to be a sentient living creature.
I don't know why Blackbeard is focussed on so much in pirate media to be honest when there are other far more successful pirates like Black Bart and Henry Every. There are some super interesting pirates out there, not just Blackbeard.
Because Blackbeard was the one who purposefully built up his reputation as an intimidation tactic so much that we still don't know what was true and what was rumours and stories.
He was one of the last pirates in the Caribbean during the Golden Age of Piracy, so he sort of symbolizes the end of an era, especially given his violent death. Mind you that's still no excuse for focusing on him to the exclusion of the other pirates.
