This was so good! I definitely have an issue with the anger emotion, like being afraid to feel it / thinking I'm going to explode and everyone is going to hate me so it stays trapped in and then I get irritable. Will practice feeling it and letting it pass!
We're much more likely to explode when we hold our anger in. When we fully feel it, process, and release it - through writing it down or dancing it out - it passes quite quickly. We become passive aggressive when we hold it in. Getting calm with it then expressing it assertively can help hugely. Saying "When you said/did this, I felt [angry/hurt] and I'd like to talk about it. Then it's just communication, and not nearly as scary! Anger helps us set boundaries and stand up for ourselves when we can use it healthily. Best of luck.
This was a refreshing change from all the spiritual work I've been doing. For example, the Course in Miracles says "Anger is never justified." I chronically repress it and have experienced a lot of physical illness instead. Recently I realized that it is ok to not like everyone. Ha!
Wow, what a repressive attitude towards a feeling as natural as the full spectrum of the rainbow! We don't demonize purple, or say red is wrong and negative! Why do so many people want us to avoid feelings that come for a reason? Anger helps us set boundaries; makes us realize we feel hurt, violated, or ignored; impels us to take action to change a situation that isn't working. Expressed calmly, as in "When you said/did this, I felt angry," is wonderful communication. Only when expressed as drama and a desire to win at all costs or wound is it abusive. When people repress it, it often gets turned inwards, becoming depression, chronic pain or illness. (Much of this is from the books of psychoanalyst David Richo and Harriet Lerner, whom I love.) You're listening to your OWN feelings, Roberta - which is so much healthier! Good for you.
This was a really good ST. I have chronic pain and fatigue. I like how this helped me feel the anger inside my body and embrace it rather than denying or trying to push it away
I’ve listened to so many of Dr Yo’s videos and this one really hit the mark. I feel some degree of anger most days due to frustration. Right now I’m angry because I lack the skills necessary to visualize what Dr. Yo is asking in this and other videos. That aside I need to stay calm when an anger situation arises, such as dealing with the hordes of big dummies playing with their silly little cell phones while driving. Thanks for all you do Dr. Yo.
Hi Yonit, wow thank you for this video, I settled in to it and really followed what you were saying, to start with I couldn’t conjur up the anger and then I found I was able to when I really thought of some scenarios and I felt it like it was almost ping ponging inside !! Somehow, I then felt what I linked my anger to (family related) and I realise I have been burying this low level anger and sadness for years and years and years. I then burst into tears?! I can’t really describe it but I kind of feel I’ve released something. Thanks Yonit for your ongoing support x
Hi Gill, This is great! These breakthroughs are so positive and it really is quite freeing when you are able to find these emotions that are buried deep inside. I wish you continued healing. PS I do this exercise myself! It has been a big deal for me!
Thank you for this wonderful experience. I didn't know I have so much anger inside, what a relief to let it be and come out. Can you make one for sadness? Your videos are so helpfull, I am so thankful for your effort in the videos.
Jacolien, thank you so much for your kind words. I practice this one myself and it was a big change for me. I can make one for sadness! But I do want to say, if you're struggling with grief after a loss, I would highly recommend Joanne Cacciatore's book Bearing the Unbearable.
@@TheSteadyCoach thank you for the recommendation! It is not necessary grief, more like a pain and sadness for the things I can not do anymore, like go on holiday or shopping with friends. Maybe a little bit grief for my old life.
@@Jacoliennn1 Pain and sorrow for things you cannot currently do are a part of grief as Dr. Yonit said - ongoing grief at the loss of your health. I heard a talk by a grief and loss counselor at an MEFM (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/CFS/Fibromyalgia) group once. She said when you have a disability, there is a lot of grief and loss, with the classic feelings of bargaining, denial (oh boy, I remember that one), depression, anger, sadness, and finally acceptance. They don't come in any order, and we need them all to mourn out losses healthily and release them. The trouble is, some of us were raised to repress our emotions, and aren't even aware we have them, and so don't fully feel, process, then release them. When I had 10 major griefs and losses in one year, I saw a grief counselor individually - and it was incredibly healing. After a year I looked at my list and realized I was over it - and didn't need to see her again for 20 years. Videos like this are very helpful for those who repress or suppress anger, and I recommend reading a book on grief or talking with a good grief counselor.
Hi Dr Yo ☺️ thank you so much for this ❤️ I have a couple questions : I feel FUSTRATION alot I'm realizing, as I'm becoming more mindful. It's almost always related to symptoms especially them elevating and/or the limitations of my current daily life. Also alot of the fustration I'm realizing is directed at myself -like for thinking I need to "do better with my mindset " or second guessing what tasks i can and cant do at any given time, and things like that. I know how important it is now to be kind to yourself etc and I'm really trying to adopt self soothing etc but when symptoms get really bad it's so hard nt to subconsciously direct fustration at myself. Is fustration really just anger? When u talk in this video u discuss how anger is just alerting us to needs that haven't been met or addressed - for me the fustration I feel , i believe is centered all around the symptoms and severe limitations (house bound withsever cfs) I currently have. So I don't know how to resolve or solve these needs that aren't being met as that really can only happen if I am more able to do normal things, socialize,care for myself properly etc. Does that make sense? Like i feel like the fustration or needs cant be met so how to let go of the fustration 🤣?❤️🙏
Hi Megan, this is tough to answer in text but what you’re describing as frustration sounds like what some would call a “secondary emotion,” aka an emotion that arises as the result of some other emotional pain. Of course you’d be angry and upset at having physical limitations, but often I find that the anger is a response to other feelings, like the hopelessness and pain people feel as the result of their condition. Anger is very very important as a signal to us that our needs are not being met in relation to someone else, but when it’s turned inwards, it is not the primary emotion. So, I would not focus on anger that is turned inwards on yourself. I would explore what other feelings that anger is responding to and see if you can give voice to those emotions. I’d also check in your relationships with others to see if there is anger there- especially with loved ones.
Wow, doing this exercise was really intense for me. It showed me that I really do not feel comfortalbe with anger (my immediate reponse is guilt/shame for feeling it). I want to continue this practice so that I can build a relationship of safety with this emotion. Can I ask though, is there anything we can do to ease into this if this feels really intense? I tried clenching and unclenching my hands to release some of the tension. I wonder if holding an object to feel grounded would also be helpful?
Thanks. Very helpful. I am so angry that my body has not served me well. I have been dizzy and metabolically ill since 1990. Caused by dr’s mistake. Something else keeps sending back to me”go” in the game of life each time I advance. After losing my good ear three weeks ago ( dr says all Ménière’s), my anger and sadness at having to climb this next mountain is overwhelming. Don’t even know if I want to. Been fighting too long.
Hi Dr. Arthur, Today marks 2 months since the dizziness has started. This off kilter feeling that could be compared to tilting, with brain fog and light and sound sensitivity (never felt spinning). The first two weeks were hell, while the third week had symptoms really ease up while on a trip with my family, to them all coming back in week 4 just as they were when they started. The second month of this has consisted of me going into these periods of 4-5 bad days where symptoms really don’t change, to then around 2-4 good days where the symptoms are not gone but just so much more manageable. Every time i have good days it feels like finally maybe this time it will all go away. It’s feels like i’ve had 6 relapses already in 2 months or “extinction bursts.” I had testing done at a hearing and balance clinic with results coming back saying I have possible utricle and saccular loss on the left side, and some left beating nystagmus. Does this mean I went through a neuritis? I am not too hung up on the diagnosis to be honest, as i understand the recovery from a migraine, pppd, or any of these disorders will be similar. I just do not understand why I am going through this good day/bad day cycle. Waking up and realizing you are going through a relapse is the worst feeling, i just don’t understand why mine are so persistent. It’s very hard to find people who are going through this same pattern as me. So i guess I am just reaching out to you to ask if you have any thoughts on what you think may be going on with me? your videos have helped tremendously in terms of hopefully preventing this from forming into a neural circuit issue if it is not a neuritis. Regardless, thank you for everything that you do!
Hi David, Thank you so much for your kind words. I am so glad you found me! I am so sorry you are experiencing this. I'm glad that you are seeing some positive changes though. These ups and downs that you are describing are extremely common with neural circuit dizziness. You may find this video on how to tell the difference between PPPD or MDDS (neural circuit dizziness) helpful if you have not seen it yet. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-rtwNNaw7dqA.html These inconsistent ups and downs can occur for many reasons but most of the time rule out a biological cause. It is hard for me to draw more conclusions without talking to you personally. You are welcome to check out my free course if you have not already done so. I also do see people for one on one consults in situations like this. You are welcome to get on my waiting list or schedule at www.thesteadycoach.com if you would like to discuss your situation in detail!
HI Y N, I am so sorry you are experiencing this. It is very common for people with dizziness to have this symptom. I would recommend the somatic tracking exercise ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Xz15HrSpISo.html and/or somatic walking ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-kl4YibFN2xM.html. This will help the brain not react as strongly to the uncomfortable sensations.
I would love your opinion. I have NO trouble feeling or expressing my anger calmly "at strength", yet I have chronic pain from fibromyalgia. I was bullied as a child, and had my mother not found out, I suspect depression and anger repression would have been in my future. But she taught me to fight back and I now use my anger to set boundaries. But I DO have hypervigilance from birth from a violent birth, the hyperalertness of death threats as a child (union leader father) and being a bullied child. Could that have caused it? Because it sure isn't repressed anger! I DO have irritability, though, from prolonged and inescapable stress.
Absolutely. Anger is only one dimension and it’s often not the issue. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-9MWKH8XOoC8.htmlsi=sEPqAnT0psnbgXJh
; i'm using the translator; i was diagnosed with pppd 10 months ago and nothing seems to improve; i've tried isrs; acupuncture; vestibular rehabilitation (I've been there for 3 months and I'm not getting better) I'm going to start cognitive behavioral therapy because that's all I need; I've hired an English teacher to translate all your videos for me, which I can do because I can't anymore; my physiotherapists don't understand why I get dizzy normal walking and normal movements and running and playing soccer for example no; is this normal? I hope to be cured one day but every time I see it more difficult; blessings and thanks.
Hi Oscar, wow, I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. One thing I would recommend is my course. The videos are in English but there is a lot of text and I even have instructions at the beginning on how to use the Google Translate plugin to translate it into any language. Some videos will auto translate (see this video for how to set that up ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-LZz03myFuWA.html) or there are plugins you can get for your browser that will translate all captions like this one chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/auto-translate-for-youtub/codommceejgdnbmfednpkhkfnlbepckf. The course is at members.thesteadycoach.com and it is 100% free!
@@yendryrojas ahora tuve un par de días un poco malos pero la clave es no pensar que mierda esto va a ir otra vez a peor;si no tranquilizarse y pensar que estado un montón de días bien!!!yonith es la mejor en esto sin duda.
