How Men Experience Stress (and why it's different from women) 

I think that could definitely be something that happens in a lot of families/couples - where females may be more likely to take their stress out on their partner or children, while males may be more likely to take their stress out on people outside the family unit. But I always try to remember something I read from comedian Paul Reiser: "Why do we think it's okay to be on our best behavior for everyone BUT our partner? Why do I make my PARTNER check to see if I have food in my teeth, when she's the one I should still be wooing?" ;)

"Better" is a pretty tough word to define. Studies suggest that men may outwardly APPEAR to handle stress "better," but it may be because they internalize the pressure, don't talk about it, and just keep pressing forward. In some cases, that may work well for them, but in other situations, it puts them at a disadvantage. You're absolutely right that it's okay for us to all be different.

Hormone levels are just one fragment of knowledge, in real life that's meaningless because it's lacking context. Let's provide some. Men have strategies to cope with stress that don't involve other people. Why should that be a bad thing? That's actually an advantage in modern society, where fewer people have close friends, get married later or never. Also people spend more time in the work place, which is not exactly a place for compassion. I see women at a disadvatage here. There is nothing wrong with distracting yourself from a problem (as long as you aren't putting it off for too long or use drugs for distraction). Give yourself a break. Just rest and return stronger. For example hitting the gym when you're stressed can be an act of self care and is good for your (mental) health. So you could make the case that women should learn something from men when it comes to stress. Experiencing stress and then talking and talking and talking, getting deeper into the problem, fixating on it, is not solving anything and is overrated in my opinion. Women are bonding and feeling good, but many words coming out of your mouth doesn't mean you are actually saying something. The cause of the stress remains. So why should this strategy be better? I think women should not force their strategy on men. Men should fix things or have their space if that makes them feel better and women should talk. Both genders should respect that their needs are different and try to cater to that in a relationship. This is the conculusion I am drawing from these differences in the brain. I didn't mean to be rude to you. That was just me being German ;-)

I definitely don't think you're rude, Cornelia! :) I think your feelings are right on, in that no one should force their strategies on other people. And you're SO right that while connecting and talking out a problem is good, "rumination" is incredibly unhelpful. Rumination is definitely not a suggested strategy. All of us - no matter our gender, our age, our job - should try a new strategy if what we're currently doing isn't working for us. Male stress isn't objectively worse than female stress - it's just different. I was just as surprised as you to find out about this particular hormone that helps keep us calmer!