How Self-Sabotage Is Tied to the Fear of Abandonment 

I'm glad this gave you some perspective on what you're struggling with!

Take a step back and let things flow as they need to. It will be uncomfortable and will require a lot of patience.

@@kat.eleftheriou I am. My younger brother's unexpected death by accident last February turned everything upsidedown. I am now in the process of restructuring my life. And making choices that won't lead me back to the self sabotaging that was caused by childhood trauma. It's weird how death and loss almost instantly makes you forget your life before the loss. Like, the abandonment has actually taken form in death. And now in my case, I have to let go of everything that I was always so afraid or hesitant to let go before because they make up a chunk of my identity. I just stopped my business, let go of a limerent object, and let go of the idea of growing old having my younger brother along with the ride. Now, I am stopping the chase. I let things fall on me now. Cue in Fall On Me by A Great Big World.

While, yes, everyone is flawed and imperfect, I wouldn't say that means they're not good enough. I think it's important to first define what you feel not good enough for and then uncover what initially made you believe that. More often, that belief is one passed down to us by those we were raised around. It's a learned belief IMO.