Self-Sabotaging Habits That Are Keeping You Stuck

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SELF-SABOTAGE
You may be sabotaging yourself, your happiness, your success, and your relationships without even knowing it. We all have subconscious habits, beliefs, and patterns that we're doing that are keeping us stuck, holding us back and leaving us feeling frustrated and confused. Here I teach you 3 very common self-sabotage habits you may be doing and what to do about them so you can stop sabotaging yourself.
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#selfsabotage #cbt #mentaltoughness

Опубликовано:

5 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 291

@parastoomohajer3551 4 года назад

When I look at it, I see that fear gets up earlier than me in the morning and finds a way to manifest itself in every single activity... I believe fear is what makes us tired and not the actual work...

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I agree. Work is not usually tiring - it's just doing something. But it's all the mental drama we create around the work that's exhausting.

@jasongodwin9454 4 года назад

The internet and RU-vid is so completely overloaded with 100's of self help guru's ranting their own woolly 'guaranteed method to getting your life back together' that it leaves you more confused than when you started. However, I have to say that this is the most accurate, concise and helpful presentation I have watched to date and it completely resonated with me. Bravo Julia and thankyou.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Jason - you win for best comment of the day. Thanks brother - that really means a lot and it's exactly what I aim for in all of my work.

@yeswing10 4 года назад

Being my authentic self started when I cleaned out all the "haters"! Eagles soar alone! When I see someone better than me, I don't hate them, I try to find out how to achieve also! Haters are losers!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Haters are hurting people - and their criticism has nothing to do with us - they're just offsetting their own unmanaged minds and emotions on to us - but I completely understand not wanting to stick around for that.

@yeswing10 4 года назад

Sometimes you do have to compare yourselves to others. Otherwise, you would not grow, or try to achieve something worthwhile. My coworker was ready to retire with plenty of money. After my divorce, I had to start over with nothing. His success spurred me on to get serious about my finances and I achieved my goal in 2019. Iron sharpens iron, get rid of people that hold you back and don't inspire your abilities! Because when you fail, it just makes evil people happier.

@ErikaK 4 года назад

2020 is here!!!! It is time to let go of fear, to let go of what no longer serves and live our best life!!!! Believe in yourself and make each and single day count ♡

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Yes Ma'am #hereforit!

@jhondalebanogon4437 3 года назад

This...didn't age well

@christopherpape4823 4 года назад

I have to admit it's kinda liberating when I start comparing myself to others to remind myself that we aren't even really playing in the same arena....

@NenaLavonne 4 года назад

Christopher Pape great technique!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

There's absolutely no competition.

@jeremywebster5432 4 года назад

Fear. Unhealthy fear is something I need to remedy in my life.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Little steps everyday and a crap ton of self-compassion along the way.

@wascallywabbit5895 4 года назад

"Comparison is the thief of joy" is one of my favorite quotes but hard to remember sometimes . This was a good description of it.

@NenaLavonne 4 года назад

Wascally Wabbit absolutely! Great point! ♥️😊

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I love this quote too. Thanks for sharing friend.

@HRB431 2 года назад

I live my life by these words! I learned this saying while in an ED recovery program. Even chose my business name to be associated with it. It serves in every scenario. 🙌

@teresasmietana8394 4 года назад

I’m up for the challenge. I have 2 small children who need a mother who is grounded and mentally strong. Thank you for your words!

@gailflora1835 2 года назад

The few times I stood up to fear and “did it anyway” (such as public speaking, flying, having a baby after a loss, and completely starting over in a new city) were the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. Still proud of myself. 😊

@jillarchi4920 4 года назад

I'm becoming obvious to me that I over extend myself to make friends, I mainly did that in my dating, but now, I do it more for my friends. I've got to focus more of that on me

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Yes ma'am. Spend that energy loving on your amazing self, and you'll find that you'll attract people who love you for you, not what you can do for them.

@natashamudford4011 4 года назад

Something in this video took me back to elementary school, where I was very concerned about being popular.... which I was not. I would study the popular kids, trying to figure out what made them so desirable. A lot of it was external: how physically attractive (God given) and/or fashionable (funded by parents). At some point I gave up worrying about it, concentrated on my grades, pursued my own interests and hobbies, joined the band (lovely collection of non-popular people), and became the person that I am. It would be nice to be able to nail down what caused this transformation, but not altogether necessary. I'm just grateful it happened. Thanks for your videos, Julia! Keep going for walks, and keep your eyes open for bears!

@Mary-zr2uy 4 года назад

I really needed to hear this . Fear is a big one . Fear of making the wrong decision , and the repercussions of such decisions

@garimasaxena4607 3 года назад

Hi Julia! It's been a month since I've started watching your videos on self help. And I must say that you and your words are empowering. It's such an irony that we are own creator of problems. And the solution of those problems lie within us. Ah! It's like a mind opener. Thank you so much for the ever inspiring and assuring content. Love. ❤️

@Simplyme714 3 года назад

Fear has definitely been a big part of my life. I’ve been letting fear talk me out of pursuing a better career for fear of rejection. Thinking about it now is giving me anxiety. This video has made me more aware and I will try and tell myself that there is no threat. It’s all ok!!!! Thank you!!

@user-gy7bg1rv6o 4 года назад

I have so much difficulty answering the questions, who do you are when you have nothing to prove. This hit hard!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I love that you're taking this to heart and letting yourself reflect more deeply on it.

@myumbrellav.4488 4 года назад

I mustered the courage to call for a therapist today. It was one of the most emotional phone calls I’ve ever had to make. I feel so depleted, sighs, sabotaging everything that ever come across my way. I can’t wait to let go. Thank you for the talk.

@yoyoz333 3 года назад

I feel increasingly overwhelmed by the amount of extra skills i'm expected to have in my profession, and that is what makes me feel not good enough.

@lizzie2103 4 года назад

This something I always struggle with. All my relationships I self sabotage

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Do you have any insight as to why? What do you fear about getting close to people?

@lizzie2103 4 года назад

@@juliakristinamah getting hurt. We grew up in a dysfunctional home

@shanematthews1985 4 года назад

Right, but my "authentic" self has no goals, no dreams and is happy to just sit and do nothing, which even i can see isn't healthy, i mean i get that i self-sabotage, hell i do it constantly, and its not exactly a challenge when all i have to do is look at my life lol My "authentic" self is what ruins my relationships, its what drives away the people i care about and its what is currently pushing away the most important person in my life currently, so saying that all you can be is "you" doesn't really fill me with a lot of hope because the "authentic" me is going to end up alone to the point where i decide to just give up

@slxbeats8146 3 года назад

🤔

@Itsme_yaGuRL_ 3 года назад

Are you happy?

@scottkraft1062 3 года назад

Your authentic self is the child. I found mine through self analysis while reading philosophy/psychology living without any attachment to anything but me and stopped trying living only for that day.

@MovableNu 4 года назад

This came up from my Watch Later list at the right time. Fear keeps telling me to look to others to see how short I'm falling. Instead I should keep my eyes on my own paper and remember we're not even eating from the same pie!

@sharonfleming810 3 года назад

I'm going to rehab tomorrow and I'm scared. I hope I can remember your advice, thanks

@dianasmith4558 Год назад

I've been letting fear stop me from looking for what my next job and what I REALLY want to do, and what my passion is regardless of the fact that I'm 57.

@nathananderson8720 10 месяцев назад

This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my RU-vid channel 5 months ago about self development. Now I have 307 subs and almost > 100 hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I couldn’t have learned without getting started in the 1st place.

@beckyb6115 3 года назад

writing and creating ='ing freedom of expression, wearing dresses and being butch, talking to woman, being happy out in the open, being joyful with a childlike nature. Taking on life as a whole; Grounding is a practice, awareness of thought is a practice, non judgment and love is a practice. I am ready to live with freedom and intention, while I unlearn fear as fast as possible.

@lesliengo8347 2 года назад

Absolutely, we are enough. Many of us are trying to be someone or something that we are not and when we are doing that we are not being authentic, which means we will not have authentic connections. And comparing yourself to someone else many times makes me feel "less", which makes me feel terrible. This is a very powerful and eye opening talk that I am proud to experience and would share this out if I feel it would help someone.

@sublimeentertainment880 3 года назад

You honestly could’ve stop at the 5 minute mark and you’ve given enough truth, very helpful video, thank you for sharing

@beatmixer0097 3 года назад

Man I’m so guilty of these. Thank you for what you do, I’m navigating a lifetime of issues and this channel has provided me a compass.

@lisaed21 4 года назад

As I've said before, YOU have kicked booty for me many times & got me out of myself & back into life. I do know that I tend to let fear control me, so...time to get back into the game & kick fear to the curb. THANK YOU ALWAYS for giving me the tools I need to make this happen! You are a lifesaver & game changer sweet lady!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Lisa - you are an incredible woman - I feel blessed to know you.

@MorganJServices 4 года назад

Julia, your content on RU-vid is valuable beyond measure and most certainly changing lives. Thank you for being so generous with your time and talents. I receive the notice of this new video and sadly avoided watching it for almost a week. Somehow I knew the counsel was going to be very difficult to hear ( and put into practice) as if you were going to be rooting out the worst of what still plagues my mind and my soul. I was reminded of a therapist I met with 35 years ago who asked me just 1 question after a brief conversation. The question began the journey out of a secret hell. I will never forget him or that moment in time as long as I live.

@mrhos86 4 года назад

Happy New Year Julia! Thanks for another good vid!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Happy New Year my friend. Great to see your face here.

@NenaLavonne 4 года назад

YES! We are enough. So so enough! Our authentic self is someone to celebrate ♥️ Happy New Years, everyone! Beautiful video!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Amen sister! Happy New Year Nena.

@PiaAmorin 3 года назад

You're so clear. I'm very glad I found your channel. Thank you, Julia!

@deandrawatkins3155 4 года назад

One of my favorite videos you’ve done!! Thank you!!!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Hey sis - I'm really glad it connected in such a big way. Happy New Year!

@olsfield 4 года назад

You are blowing me away! I am spinning so out of control right now. I started with your Self esteem vid. Now watching this. I am making myself so miserable in life. I have a lot of work to do. I’m very happy that I have found coaching on RU-vid. Thanks

@borninthefla 4 года назад

Loved this message today. My new morning routine is listening to one of your videos every morning! Thanks!

@tarajoyce3598 3 года назад

I absolutely share your videos! Your generosity is profoundly appreciated. Thank you for reaching out your hand, filled with insight, expertise and guidance. Your communication style is as easy as chatting with a best friend.

@MoGoNicole 3 года назад

Wow, thank you so much for this video. I've been sabotaging myself in more ways than one......

@mariam7797 4 года назад

Thank you so much for your work!!! Continue doing videos ❤️

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I'm here for it if you are Maria!

@sadiaarman363 3 года назад

Omg. FEAR!! That!!! Fear of all things high and beautiful; self- doubt with respect to worthy goals. It has eaten up so much in my life!

@CherbearAnn 4 года назад

Soooo good!! Thank you very much for speaking these truths. I learn so much from you. We are all so individual and have our own stuff and for us not to compare is Huge!

@NenaLavonne 4 года назад

Cheryl Ann 👏👏👏😊

@DrShelleyMeyer 4 года назад

Love this video, fear can be disabling, and comparison totally holds us back. Thanks for all you do, just shared this on my fb page!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Shelley! So glad you're here and that this connected with you. And thank YOU for sharing it. Here's to your amazing 2020.

@robintempel2925 4 года назад

Thank You! Much Love

@zzzpmi 3 года назад

Thank you Julia I finally discovered someone whom I can connect to here in RU-vid. I like how you deliver, and honestly this black and white effect allows me to get focused attentively. I make it a point to watch at least 2 videos daily here as part of my coping mechanisms. I re watch some of them if I need to. More power to you from Carlos here in the Philippines

@scorpionking7454 4 года назад

What a great concisely educational way to look at topics that I have battled with mentally for years the fear of letting people down the fear of trying to be all things to all people and failure comes slaps me on the face .this video has opened my thoughts and mind that this is my life and I’m taking the power away from others that offer me nothing in life .

@yourstruly1018 3 года назад

Thank you Julia for such a nice reminder

@treehugger7948 4 года назад

Thank you for helping me better understand those things that have hurt me. Things that have paralyzed me and stopped my growth. I am afraid of disappointments and rejection. I worry that I can not be what I hope to be. This is true for me as a writer and artist. Trying to achieve that goal requires hardwork and determination so letting fear rule me into not trying seems easier than the fear of doing and failing. I love how you stated to be intentional. I intend to do what I can and learn even through whatever failure or success. It is my intentions that will drive me. Thank you and I look forward to more great insight.

@sarahlee7303 2 года назад

I have been letting fear hold me back from working and growing my own business. I work and it’s great then one day I have a slow day then won’t go. Back for two weeks at a time after a bad day 😩 just because of fear. And then it makes me miss all the good days and a couple slow days I could have had in that two weeks

@SA-hy6nw 4 года назад

Loved this Julia ❤️

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Thanks friend. That means a lot. Thanks for being here.

@johnhausler2706 4 года назад

Thanks Julia.....Very inspiring......Great job as usual....

@HRB431 2 года назад

YAS girl! Every human needs to hear this! ♥️

@4anniebrown 4 года назад

You’re so incredibly on target’! Thanks for this video. Shared it with a couple family members that I know will appreciate it too!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Thanks sister! Really glad it connected.

@borninthefla 4 года назад

These videos really help me. I’m grateful that I found your channel.

@toriviruette5 4 года назад

Julia, what a great video - TFS! Wishing you a fabulous 2020, filled to brim with health, joy and prosperity ✨

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

You too friend! Glad you're here.

@DB-ti6kg 4 года назад

I like you. You tell it like it is. Not sugar coated. Exactly what I need. The 2 videos that really got me are the 10 things you are and are not responsible for. Keep doing what you do and I will keep watching your awesome videos!

@NenaLavonne 4 года назад

David Beaver yes!!! 😊

@afenton32 4 года назад

Thank you so much for posting this video. I am guilty of being a people pleaser, trying to impress people and not being my authentic self. I needed to hear this.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Who you are is absolutely enough - don't forget that.

@johnpool5629 Год назад

Hi Julia there has been a lot of things over the last 30 years that fear has held me back and I am starting to let some of these things go now thank for your videos that have helped me a lot, have a great week Julia.

@bluespanda1713 4 года назад

Great video!! Happy New year!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Happy New Year Rich!

@melyndafrazer1962 2 года назад

I’m doing all of the above and I’m miserable.....soooo miserable, down, depleted, discouraged... so down on myself right now

@michelecoe5925 3 года назад

Love this one!!!

@pandvsims 4 года назад

Well done Julie!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Thanks brother - really glad it connected.

@stoneyvowell1239 4 года назад

Very interesting and informative Julia. I share your videos on Facebook all the time. The problem is most people don't care enough to even watch them. But it is very good information that I wish more people would take advantage of.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Thanks for sharing them friend - it really means a lot. And know that the right people will watch them at the right time for them. I appreciate you.

@Stitchxavi 4 года назад

CLEAN. Makes so much sense. Yes!

@grecesti 4 года назад

dear Julia you're such an amazing lady sharing pro bono all the support for us! wish you a very happy new year,thx so much for the help💟

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Happy New Year to you too friend.

@druth8803 4 года назад

This is so timely!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I love it when that happens - don't you? Happy New Year friend.

@gen8878 4 года назад

Oh my God ♥,I had to stop the video and say yeees, yeees, yeees ..thank you very much I already knew that something is not going right .it's not okay trying Change as to be, "better me" for me it's exactly as you've said it means that I'm not okay, not enough, need more, need copy someone else over myself ,just you as a specialist saying what I say it's a sign for me .. Happy new year, wish you all the best♥, keep watching 😊

@3leafofficial 4 года назад

I love your videos so much, thank you for everything !!!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Thanks Jacob - that means a lot. Glad you're here and doing this work.

@susanzacharia6598 4 года назад

Thanks so much Julia ❤️

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Always Susan - glad you're here.

@loritikka6714 4 года назад

Have have let fear stop me from moving forward with my business by coating myself to others and feeling like I am not as good as them. Very sad and something I have been working on the overcome.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Why do you need to be like anyone else to bring what YOU have to the world?

@tedraymond7322 4 года назад

You are awesome!! Can’t tell you how much you have helped me!! And that was with one video!! Totally excited to watch all of them!! And use it to improve my life and marriage!! Words can’t describe my gratitude Julia !!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Ted - your words really moved me. Glad you're here and a very Happy New Year to you.

@asorgenfrei10 4 года назад

I recently let fear keep me from taking a new job that would make me more money and give me new experiences. Travel was involved and I didn’t feel like doing that. However I should definitely have tried it since my current company is not allowing me to grow.

@bridgetregan9408 3 года назад

I'm watching you from the UK, and find your advice invaluable! thank you so much, Bridget

@KritTeekDeZigns 4 года назад

This makes so much sense. Comparing ourselves to someone else is stressful and tiring. We're so busy trying to be like someone else we don't know who we are, the talents we possess, lose sight of what our purpose is for being here on earth. It is an inside job. I was raised in fear of my dad which I think led me to fear of success. I now have a jewelry business where I design, cut, and make the pieces myself. Although I feel my work is good, fear sets in when I get an order, trying to tell me it's not good enough. Now after listening to you, I 'm wondering if this is the reason why I brand name my products "mPERFEKtion". Wow! Lightbulb moment. Thank you.

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

Glad you writing this down gave you that insight.

@garethconnor9113 4 года назад

Brilliant video,New to this channel. Thank you 😊.

@dettidobrocsi6395 4 года назад

Thank You!!!!!!!!!!It is help a lot!🥰❣

@lolameakinn4482 2 года назад

Always very useful and easy to use techniques. Thank you for being you.

@tomtbi 2 года назад

I shared this video with my self groups in Facebook.. I think they need it as much as I do!

@abdulrahmantanweermena75 4 года назад

You are amazing.. all the best!!!

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

And are YOU my friend. Happy New Year.

@Claus1234 2 года назад

As a registered life coach myself, I am constantly amazed at what I think others may think of me. I am constantly discovering that life for me, too, is a learning ... And you, Kristina, are fine and very adept at conveying the truths of life's "mysteries" we can all become better at integrating. Thanks for your words, and this channel :)

@BigPete44 4 года назад

Thank you for your help Julia!! It surely helps! Happy New Year Beautiful!! 🙏👍😘😘

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

You too Pete!

@BigPete44 4 года назад

Thank You!! 😉

@GabrielGarcia-ic6nv 2 года назад

Really really really good content here!!!

@sadiaarman363 3 года назад

Gosh you" re powerful! Authentic self, yes!!! Thanks

@karenswanson6352 4 года назад

This was so beneficial. I shared it to many.

@3leafofficial 4 года назад

This was exactly what I needed to hear

@juliakristinamah 4 года назад

I love it when that happens.

@myumbrellav.4488 4 года назад

I love this Episode!

@lorilocascio2921 2 года назад

Julia I can’t thank you enough I just don’t know what to say I’m just speechless because I need all the help I can get This video is so valuable all your videos are I’m not sure if it’s this one I think it is because I watch them repeatedly I remember when you said everybody has their own pie and that really helped me so much I just learned this from you and it was life-changing and 55 years old and I really need all the help I can get LOL