it's not you, it's your 20s 

ur beaut and so is everything u do 💓 thx for this video grad school apps are killing me

Your aesthetic has always been so inspiring to me

your aesthetic is just something incredible! and your comforting words always make my days and my life (!!) brighter 💌

love u the most angel! And ur outfit is absolutely adorable 🥰 hope you’re well lovely

Thank you good sir, I missed your content and got sent this. So it was probably the algorithm being like “oh, you DEFINITELY need this”

those moments make good stories...right? * nervous laughter *

@@ConnorFranta my heart🥲😭💓

But of you drink to much you really do forget things tho...

you don't forget the things you regret!

I lost it at that part lol

the way i felt when i put this whole scene together.... * unstoppable *

Obsessed with the look, but specifically the pants! Contrast stitching? *chef’s kiss*

legit

underrated comment 🤣🤣🤣

i agree 1000 percent on everything. i graduate college in may!

@@TreyDewitt congrats!!! I hope you celebrate and get to enjoy it! it’s a huge accomplishment :)

@@Toonksbell43 ahh thanks ! 😄

I AGREEE 100%% I just graduated this summer and after graduating I had to move back home and I’ve been applying for jobs since July and haven’t been offered anything :((((

@@elannawright3801 YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I've been applying to jobs since june 2020, had to take a restaurant job instead which was terribly under staffed because of COVID, its rough out here for us post-grads just entering the 'adult world' and trying to explain that to my parents is impossible as I'm sure you can relate! Hang in there we'll get our chance soon :)

do you have any advice for me? im 19 rn and turn 20 soon and I'm nervous

YES TO THIS. I'M ALSO 25 (turning 26 in a few months), and it's SO challenging to figure out the "best" path. i know i don't want to stay in the state that i'm currently in (geographically, lol), but my job is here. which means, if I move, I also have to commit to restarting my job with a new company. daunting. also, having friends settling down when I am NOT ready to do so is a whole other beast.

@@KillerConfidenceQueen I wish you luck

@@silverbowftw5225 If it's any help, when you are in your 20's people older than you and your own age will try to take advantage of you constantly and standing up for yourself rarely helps. You just kind of need to avoid people that are bad and only hang around expensive and helpful people. Working with baby boomers is terrible, since they are always lying and trying to get you fired. My advice is to keep in mind it is not your fault (as long as you behave with basic manners) and invest your time in what you want because a lot of people will use you for rides, money, free work and pretend their wrongs are your fault. Wish I were kidding.

use your vacation days to travel so you can have both!!

​@Aila Verco while it's true that it's difficult to trust people, social interaction is necessary and one or two good friends is enough (if u. Have more than two trustworthy people, even better )

22 and 23 were HORRIBLE years for me.. I'm 24 and I didn't ever think I could create the life for myself that I have now. I was desperately waiting for the day I'd feel fulfilled and accomplished but was so depressed and unsatisfied that I didn't even try to put any effort into my growth. I truly think that your early mid 20s are meant for feeling like an absolute failure and pariah. At a certain point you just get so tired of it that you have no other choice but to try. And that is when life starts to become really beautiful. You actually aren't missing out on anything. I guarantee that most if not 90% of people that age feel the exact same way you do. If anything, lean into that feeling of isolation and figure out what that feeling of being left out brings up for you. Use it as motivation to go out and meet new people/try new things. Also recognize that you have SO much time to accomplish your dreams and goals. Were only a quarter of the way through this! I am so sorry you're struggling but all you have to do is hang on. Start keeping a journal, force yourself to strike up a conversation with a stranger once a week, and listen to your intuition. You're in a cocoon stage right now and actually need some solitude to grow. It's hard to find that balance of being social but still having space for you, having fun but still maintaining your priorities/duties, following your own path and being authentic but still knowing when to ask for help and take advice. There is so much to figure out and it can get so overwhelming. Just go slow. One day, maybe even one hour at a time. Life isn't a game to see who can accomplish everything first even though it feels like that a lot of the time. Be gentle and kind to yourself. It really helped me to treat myself like a 7 year old and re-parent myself. Would you want 7 year old you to sit on social media staring at pics of people at a party you weren't invited to? Would you want them to be in such a rush to grow up, missing out on their whole childhood? Would you want them to wish that they looked different? Don't let them settle for crappy friends or partners that don't value them. You gotta protect that kid because they are what makes life beautiful and exhilarating. Once you lose them it's really hard to keep going. So sorry for the long comment but I've been there and I feel for you. I'm not a therapist but a lot of this advice did come from mine and helped me so much. I honestly didn't think I was going to make it to 24 and a lot of people around me were surprised I did lol.

I feel u bro I am in the same situation right now 🥲

@@no_ononono3074 How has life changed so much for you in the past year? I'll be turning 23 next month, and I don't know what to do with my life. I feel so lost and frustrated. I don't even have any skills that I can think of.

@@no_ononono3074 Thankyou for writing all this, makes me feel a lot less bad about my weird life today

there's always time

@@ConnorFranta Somewhere far, far away, Wendy Williams is heard saying "She has a point"

If you have the money and are still living with your parents. Have no financial responsibilities, do it while you're young. I went to Europe twice. Both times were spur of the moment decisions.

@@megannowicki2650 I'm seriously considering it for next year!

@@RaheemD I would suggest a travel group / agency. Stayed in hotels/ hostels. Saw amazing things that are once in a lifetime opportunities. Been to southern Ireland, 5 different cities. Been to Venice, Rome, Amsterdam, Paris.

I just turned 20 too and I feel the same way ❤️❤️

Great way of putting it :) 💓 #35

I’m 22 and still figuring it out, don’t worry because you really are going to figure it out

sameee btw i just searched up connors uni and he went to an all boys school and hes gay ,makes sense XD

It's never too late and you're not too old 😊

i'm 18 and i feel like i'm too young to DO anything but too old to "start over". starting to realize there's no going back and I'll never be that lil kid with all the hope and joy and potential and curiosity again. I feel so TIRED but I'm so young. does that mean I'll keep getting more and more exhausted as I grow up? because that sounds fucking terrifying.

@@helenvane umm, yes and no, it's a cycle, don't worry about it. The end of your teen years can be stressful - finishing highschool, deciding what you want to do next, maybe moving out for college, it's very normal to be tired at that age, I was too

@@friedlemon5172 does it get better though? do you find some kind of peace eventually??

@@helenvane uhh, I'll let you know in a few years lol. I'm turning 22 in February and, hm, depends on the decisions you make now. For example, I didn't follow my heart and didn't take the time I obviously needed then to calm down and figure out what I want to do. Now my anxiety is back at it again, but it's more manageable now. Some days I do feel at peace, some days I'm the farthest from that. So, my advice to you would be: be honest with yourself, as much as you can, don't make big decisions in a panicked state of mind, and take your time. Eventually you'll find peace, eventually we'll find peace. Good luck

welcome to the chaos

@@ConnorFranta I feel like this video does and is going to help a lot, so thank you so much!

this is me 😭😭

heyy, i'll be 20 in a month too and same 😭

scorpios rise up

Lol, ok i'll try.

How’s that? Cause mommy and daddy won’t lend me money so then how am I gonna get what I without money?

I hope you'll fell better soon, sending hugs

It‘s rough, especially during a pandemic but there are always things that can make you feel better!

This sounds really rough, I hope things improve for you. If I can give you a piece of advice, unless there is some all-encompassing reason for you to be doing this major, either drop it or change it. I didn't, I spent 4 years at uni and got majorly stuck in life and depression at age 23 and it's not fun. Like, if you have to power through, it will end and you will doubtless make new friends and have good experiences, but don't sink your time and energy into something that's not interesting to you. If you don't know what interests you, take some time and figure out what you like doing right now (not all of eternity) and do that thing, or if there's something that you know you'd prefer doing, do that instead. I know very few people who actively benefitted from their time at college/uni, so if you're going to invest that money in a degree, at least make it something you care about. Sorry, just saw this comment and had to throw my two cents your way xx

Read "You are a Badass" by Jen Sincero. You won't regret it. Sending love and I hope you find your path.

Hi Brianna, I am going through the exact same thing at the moment. Know that you are not alone in what you are going through, and it does suck. But life goes on and it gets better. You got this.

YES!!!! THANK YOU!! I want to hug you so bad!

hell yeah! i feel like i miss out on a lot of things because im afraid of doing em alone. it can be scary to go out to a public event by yourself, but it can also be so liberating and who knows who'll you meet along the way? my goal is to definitely do more things alone and not be so dependent on other people.

This ^ 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽

@@pinkxxmango and if you don' meet anyone it's ok too. Sometimes I go out wishing I meet somebody and come back sad because I didn't. Don't have big expectations, just live.

OMG, I needed to read this. I'm going to change majors (I'm already at my 3th semester) and my family is not supporting me, thank you.💜

sending you so much love, kendra! ❤️❤️❤️

@@ConnorFranta thanks Connor! Best wishes 💜💜

same Kendra :( I also had to move back and I have been feeling the same :/ sending you hugs across the ocean x

@@rubiapedone31 in this together & it’s all going to be okay (hugs)

I graduated from university in the middle of this pandemic and I’m still living at home even though I turned 26 yesterday. And I’m still trying to figure it all out

I’m glad I’m not alone. I turned 26 yesterday and that’s so weird because I don’t feel like I’m even in my 20s because I don’t have a career, I still live at home. Tbh I feel like an outcast but reading your comment, seeing this video and hearing I’m not alone makes me feel better

What r u doing to get out of your comfort zone?

@@Wwetitanfan27 Well, I grew up in a toxic, abusive family, so I was always scared of and anxious around new people and I had a very strong belief I was unlovable and that people were inherently bad. At the same time, I felt like I always had to be in a relationship to have any value, so since the age of 14, I was always in relationships, even if the men were toxic. Seriously, I'd always have a backup guy I was interested in in case my bf broke up with me. My last bf was the first that I broke up with (as opposed to them breaking up with me). I've now been single for 2 years (which was out of my comfort zone). I've learned to be comfortable and confident alone. I was diagnosed with PTSD in high school. I took psychology courses about human development, relationships, and trauma (which was out of my comfort zone) and learned what healthy relationships look like. I've challenged and changed my core beliefs of the world, relationships, and myself. I challenge myself to talk to strangers wherever I go and meet new people through meetups. I have a board game called We're Not Really Strangers that I'll take to random places and I have a sign inviting people to join me. I've started teaching Zumba classes. I'm applying to graduate clinical psychology programs (even though I lack confidence in my undergraduate grades and the idea of rejection feels scary and uncomfortable). I challenge myself to try new activities at the risk of failure and have learned to laugh at my mistakes instead of beating myself up.

Interesting. Sounds like we've lived, and living very similar lives. I'm 26 and relate to everything in your comments besides being in relationships.

Omg so tru. I think about the jobs and the ppl I met...so strange

Turned 25 yesterday and I felt this in my soul

@@supermona197464 I turned 26 yesterday but same

You’re doing your best and that is what counts

You're choices are costing you you're financial future

hi, i'm also 22 and I'd love to hear some advice/things you've learned or just any thoughts about feeling lost or wasting time if you would feel comfortable sharing 🥺 Everything in this video really resonated with me, especially the part when he talked about doing crazy things even though you might regret them afterwards. I feel like I'm overthinking every move in my life and that bugs me so much! 🙃

@@natsushi Hi! fellow 22 year old who just graduated from college and was talking to my therapist about this exact thing today! Its super cliche but seriously its all about that first step. Its about saying "huh I'd like to do that" and then going "ok so how can I do that" never just "I wish I could do that." That's (mostly) worked for me but its also a constant journey of learning what your interests actually are. If you're curious you should read "The Defining Decade" by Meg Jay. Literally like 1/3 of the book is about this exact thing if I remember correctly. Its changed my perspective on this entire decade we have ahead of us.

I'm turning 22 in a few days and I honestly feel like life is so meaningless and that nothing I ever do will ever matter, I know that sounds heavy but don't get me wrong I'm really trying here 😭😂 I want to live and I have all this things I wanna do but I'm just so down all the time idk what to do or how to fix it. I've been in therapy but I was dismissed, I feel so lost. sending all of you love, I hope the rest of our 20s only get better ❤️

Same ❤ this made me feel normal and less alone. Thank you fellow human

I felt that way at 22 also! (35 Now) It was Honestly the hardest most head-trippy, mind crisis year...:then you let go and it continuously gets cooler and more freeing (hopefully) ☺️ You Are Not Your Mind ♥️♥️♥️ You’ve spent 22 years being conditioned and told how to act and feel...that’s the age you start to shed it and BE YOURSELF!!! ✨🌟

lol yes now that you mentioned it

I didn’t notice until you pointed it out lol

he had to make his bag

I'll do the same

hey! i feel the same. I started watching Connor's videos when i was 12 too, trying to understand him with subtitles. I haven't watched Connor for about 3-4 years, but i came across this video now when I'm 18. I feel some kind of sweet nostalgia when i think of the time when i was a huge fan of him. He was one of the first queer people I knew and it was so important for me. His ideas and ways of living resonated with me deeply. He really was (and actually IS) my role model. Thank you, Connor. I will always love u!

Same lol. It's been years

hope it helps! life can be so long, so there's plenty of time to exceed or completely reevaluate your exceptions ❤️

I feel the sameee 😅🙄

I get you on that. it may feel otherwise, but you are not alone. if you would like to chat or have me listen, I left my email in response to "FanofEverything" on one of the top comments. sending you lots of love. x

You and I are in the same boat, my friend. Don't worry

I feel the same. I’ve graduated from university this summer and I’m currently unemployed and I feel wtf am I doing with my life.

im talking to myself for 37 minutes with constant leaf blower interruptions LET ME MAKE A SINGLE MISTAKE

@@ConnorFranta There's mistakes and then there's that xD

@connorfranta sure! it's not like it's a huge continent in the middle of the globe or anything 🙃

I mean if he went to a country in Africa he did go to another country

That doesn’t imply he thinks Africa is a country though? If you go to another continent, you’re going to another country…

Same here