Don't let the internet rush you. Disclaimer - sorry if I went hard on Xan, using him as an example. I really hope his life gets better! Insta: / struthless69 Shop: www.struthless.com
I'm over 40, own a small business, and I'm STILL trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. Remember, every morning you wake up is the first day of the rest of your life.
I didn't figure it out until I was 47. I just turned 58 and feel like I wasted so much time in a crappy job and marriage and that now I'm running out of time.
I’m 32, living with my parents, no degree, always moving from one job to the next, trying to find a career I’d enjoy. I feel more lost, depressed, and useless than ever before. Life is genuinely so excruciating to live, but I’m trying to take it day by day.
@@annexgroup6878 Everyone says start a small business like ideas just come from nowhere😂. I’ve been thinking about doing this for ages but what business exactly? Especially for someone who doesn’t want to do the same as everyone else.
well, what exactly is the point of rewarding being useless? Instead of feeling bad about it it should be the driving force. What he just said is basically. Hey. lower your standards, lie to yourself and settle for less.
I guess I'm in a different space when it comes to social media. I've already encountered three people on there talking about their journey around becoming homeless.
Isn't it equally depressing when you have to compare yourself with total losers to feel better about yourself? It's one thing not to be a genius, but if you are four years older than the people you study with, you have every right to be concerned about that.
Just remember, if you were considered "gifted" in any way as a young person, there is nearly a 100% chance that you are profoundly majorly depressed as an adult/older person
Really great statement! I'm 23 and feel quite clearly that it refers to me: not knowing what to do with my life, family members' pressure plus COVID "drifted" me to hard depression. In my childhood I was concerned as "gifted and talented", but I don't think so. Your comment made me think about it. What's Your opinion? Why that kind of stuff You described happens to such people?
@@primavera6501 @Primavera I think it’s just because you’re trying to live up to the expectations of others and not for yourself. You can outright tell your parents that theyre over expectating and explain to them how it make you be feel overwhelmed and stressed. And if they don’t buy it, then live life like a dumb person. Act dumb. Lower people’s expectations. It will help you stop caring what other people think especially when it comes to intelligence. It will cause way less stress trust me. I’ve been through that and after I gave into that act, I can accept my dumb moments when I have them, and people won’t get surprised if I do fail. They will just expect me to try harder and I expect that myself.
@@primavera6501 I do agree, as a person labeled as "smart", I had really felt behind. I'm a teenager but it sounds too ridiculous; people just approach me to finish projects/assignments but rarely for any other reason
At 24 I felt like my life was over. At 26 I knew my life was just beginning. It's really crazy how quickly things can turn around with consistent effort, identifying your values, and picking a sacrifice. It's not easy but it does get easier. Hang in there!
I'm 38, no husband, no kids, no friends, got a job that I don't really like and I have no idea what to do in my life. I've never been so lost in my life like I am now. But your video made me feel a bit better, so thank you for that.
I live under a rock with little social media and I know I’m behind in life by society’s standards. I feel like two children in a trench coat unconvincingly cosplaying as an adult
Right? I personally hang around in different spaces on social media where people are often very supportive and have endured hardships themselves and where accounts are centered about their art or the cosplay they do and very little about themselves. On the other hand, my irl friends and friends friends achieve so much and I feel quite behind compared to them.
Being successful don’t happen by magic Success is dependent on the action or steps you take to achieve it. Show me a man who doesn't have an investment and I will tell you how soon he'll go broke Investment is building a safe haven for the future: with the right choice of investment that has at least 1% minimum risk and with an Expert guidance, profit and interest should be 💯 guaranteed.
@@anthonygold6583 I agree e with you 💯 .. I had a senior colleague at work who was doing well but never had an investment. Unfortunately he lost his job and went from living a comfortable life to hardship. There would had been something to fall back on if he had an investment
@@anthonygold6583 NOBODY BECOMES A MILLIONAIRE OR BILLIONAIRE BY WORKING FOR OTHERS AND DEPENDING ON THEM, GOOD INVESTMENT BRINGS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS AND CONSISTENCY BRINGS BILLIONS. THE MARKET IS ALL ABOUT CRYPTO NOW YOU MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO IT
@@elisabethhamilton1048 I believe The only credible law of increase is investment because money not invested has no future. I make huge profits on my investment since i started trading fx with Mr Kelvin Maorgan, his trading strategies are top notch.
I just turned 27 and struggle with mental health issues pretty bad. I recently had a serious mental break and decided to quit my horrible job, move back to my home town (at my mom's) and get my degree. I've never felt more anxious and it kills me to see all my old friends getting married, having kids, buying homes, ect while I'm moving back into my childhood bedroom. I keep telling myself that it's okay but it's really hard not to compare myself to everyone around me. Thanks for the video I really needed it right now
As a fellow 27yo I'm with you. None of my friends are married but I've been struggling to hold down a job and move out. Before that I was in uni finishing my degree that my friends finishing my bachelor's that friends completed years ago. I guess you already know that you're not alone here but I really appreciated your comment :)
but... it's so okay!!! i am in sort of same situation as you. 25 in third semester on uni, cannot stop with comparing myself to others as they are younger and they seem more mature and that they know what to do with themselves. and i'm spiralling into this abyss of absolute depression and anxiety because i'm so lost, so unhappy. but it's okay. it's okay to not be okay and it's okay to never stop searching, because i think that when you stop trying and somehow resign, you never can be really happy. and you are doing great job at making yourself a priority. AS - YOU - SHOULD
Honestly, societal success is overrated, I went through uni easiy and have a good job which pays more than a lot of people my age, but that's not the key to happiness - like this guy points out, it's more about having meaningful connections with other people, which I find lacking in my life, those are few and far in between.
Life only sucks because your government made it so, you’re not behind, the government is simply trash. Real estate is too high, medical is too high, and a proper education is expensive for no reason
Don't forget, literally every "16 year old entrepreneur/youngest millionaire" you see on social media ALWAYS conveniently has parents who are *loaded* $$$
not always. But ofteh helps...Still, some of the most amazing people are just that because they managed to make something big despite a crummy home life. However the real ticket is to be a driven person in the right place at the right time. Amazing people have lived and died that nobody knows about because their talent and work ethic came at the wrong time.
Please stop depending your self worth based on others. That's what led you to make this comment 😟 I don't care how much true or false it is, just stop it. Else your self worth will continue depending on your ego, instead of confidence, which is easily destructible. Confidence comes from within. Your self worth should depend on what you are, instead of what they are P.S. Even I'm trying for the same, hehe, just discovered all these recently
I'm 38, no wife, no kids and stuck in a shitty job for last 10 years without saving any money. I got GF that lives on the other side of the globe that I didn't see for over a year and might not see for another year. All my friends and family move on with theirs lives and it's not easy not to compare to them. Literally, everyone I think of has better life than me. I'm crying my eyes off nearly every day. On the good side though, last year I decided to do something about it. I decided to change my career and currently preparing for the IT certifications and hopefully, put my foot in the IT field this or next year. Wish me luck and thanks for the video. Subscribed.
Good to hear you changing part of recipe: Wish you the best. Perhaps watching "Finding Joe" with history of Joseph Campbell (and more) encorauges you to follow up with your new journey. What is the sense of remain on a shitty job? I do not know your job experience but if possible swapping your work for other ASAP, it would accellerate your sense of improving life already. 🤠
I quit 'social media' years ago, and it was one of the healthiest decisions of my life. I don't even use 'messaging' apps to communicate with friends or relatives. If we need to talk, we call or visit... You feel like you're going to miss out, but once your out long enough for the addiction to lose it's grip, you'll realise you're wasting way less time, worrying less, feeling left out less, all while actually engaging in the real world with the people who actually matter to you
@@_lembahmanah Take care of yourself, and focus on achieving your goals. Eat right, sleep enough, make your bed in the morning,& stay interested in learning
we have lost our identity and feel like we don't have a purpose. the american dream is dead because the workforce is no longer based on merit. it's based on politics.
I've done jobs I've hated. I'm working in a career that I feel sort of indifferent towards and I get the feeling of being stuck. I've got degrees and certifications and it's made life better but not that interested in what I'm doing (I guess I guessed wrong). Believe me if I could be come a successful actor or go back and get my degree as a physical therapist I would...but it's not that simple. Life can be bullshit for some of us. And that's just how it goes. I don't hate my life like I used to but I don't think it's ever going to be filled with a ton of meaning. So I get you (not everyone is meant to have a "successful" life and sometimes it's actually kind of healthy to accept that in a way).
I feel the same. Infact I feel I think and feel like a child too. All these other people are so grown up. Its not even about what they are doing in life but just the inner make up.
@@S-mn7du Not really. You don't know what their personal lives are like. Most of them have imposter's syndrome and/or the pressure to top what they've done. No matter how successful you get, then you have to maintain it or do even better. Everyone seems like they have it all together. They don't.
Bruh i like to be childish. On work, as an example, if i have to be serious, i am really serious. But if not, we are doing shit like 12 year old kids, puch each other, talking like borat or roleplay some bullshit like taliban guys or whatever. So where is the problem? Life is serious enough. Why not enjoying this few moments where you actually dont have to be serious.
Unfortunately, this feeling doesn't just come from celebrities on social media. I've pulled away from people in real life because of their interpersonal successes getting to a point where I feel we can't relate. Nothing is more embarrassing than running into your old knuckled-headed friend after a few years, who's now married, with a house, and is a manager or something, while I'm stuck in the same spot I was back then.
ever wonder why all the idiots have everything? because they never had to care about anything in life.. because everything was handed to them.. the whole system is corrupt.. merit is not rewarded..
I hear you, that's what I think every time I meet childhood friends and that's why I usually try to avoid it. We should simply remember everyone has a different path in life and that there's no right one or wrong one, there's just a different time and a different way for each one of us to reach stability. I know, I struggle reminding that to myself too.
Also - those "successful teenagers" have often "generous adults" behind them. It's not that they are so talented, but also get rich and powerful patrons.
Spot on! Then people feel bad about themselves when they too can’t be a self-made millionaire entrepreneur when there’s no such thing as self made to begin with
even they are not rich rich, people don't realize just having a safe place to stay and emotional, moral support is richness. a lot of us are starting from zero.
I recently turned 48 -- and I've been trying not to have a midlife crisis. For all my adult life, I've struggled heavily with an anxiety disorder and have kept running into brick walls in every direction I've turned regarding educational and vocational choices. Everything I try turns out to be something I'm not well suited for, can't really make a living from, or just doesn't work out for one reason or another. At times, it's been a huge struggle not to give in to despair. So I'm trying to pick myself up and begin my 'second act' in life, hoping and praying that it will prove much better than my first. Thanks for the encouraging video. I have to remind myself to keep soldiering on, 'reinvent' myself if necessary, and keep an eye out for opportunities.
I turned 30 yesterday and I'm glad I finally decided to watch this. I've struggled with this since I was 20, since I started learning guitar and was constantly seeing musicians who were already successful that age because they started playing at 5 years old. I just constantly felt like it was too late for me. Luckily I'm of the mindset that there is no time like the present to get started.
Those 5 year olds were tickling the ivories since they could sit up. That is still 4 years of practice. There's kids that speak two languages. I may be 22, nearly 23, but I'm not going to let children with the advantage of parents who cared and could, get in the way of learning Spanish and violin. I'm over one year into Spanish practice, and about to get some books and rosin for my violin, the instrument of which I received through a childhood manifestation. I recently wrote a retrospective poem to 19 year old me, from the perspective of 30 year old me. The last line goes "there's no time like yesterday and tomorrow to make your life worthwhile, blossom,". Yesterday, because the trauma and turmoil adds character, and tomorrow may not be guaranteed but don't be so hard on yourself for not seizing the present. Still, Así es la vida, Lo hecho hecho y Lo que sera sera Tambien; carpe diem.
It's all about circumstances. Not everyone came from a loving family, not everyone comes from money, not everyone has talents, good health, or good looks. You're just going to have to play with the hand that was dealt to you, to the best of your abilities. Not only is life hard, it's also not fair.
Very true and sometimes those cards can fuel an individual to create things that make it easier for others who are also in a similar situation. For example, support groups, community outreach, shelters, etc. all it takes is one person to show up and do something. We can all make positive change with ourselves and those around us.
This is the one thing arrogant “successful” people that doesn’t understand. They all say its only about “hard work”, true in a sense but LUCK plays a larger role in this world. I’m pretty fucking sure that there is a hell of a lot more talented UNKNOWN people in our 7 billion inhabited planet than Justin Bieber, smarter than Elon Musk, more beautiful and natural than Kylie Jenner but as we all know, life or destiny pulls these people most often unwillingly in other directions.
@Aaron NoneYa I’m super glad to know that I am not alone in this realization. Sharing your personal sentiments and advice added to my inspirations. Even though I am one of the “lucky” few to suffer hardships in this world, I’m truly fortunate to have friends and people that support me like you through simple ways. Goodluck on your journey brother and Godbless.
@@asurfingsilver2922 I only came here to say that I totally agree with you guys. The role luck and circumstance play is way bigger than we could imagine.
totally, I'm not 30 but not far away and sure i work and pay my bills but man do i feel like I'm lost, I see everyone settle down and happy and then there's me just working hard to make it day to day, it's nice to know I'm not alone! Equally, i hate when your told your not serious for a adult, if i wanna joke at 30, surely i can still have fun and enjoy my time, right?
I'm 20 and I feel behind in life. My dreams and ambitions have always been big but I've always held myself back because of my uncertainity of if i can achieve them.
Same. Something you worked so hard for and it doesn’t end up happening. It’s so paralysing. It’s like who you are is getting crushed. I’m trying to get myself to do stoic fear setting (if you haven’t heard - see TED talk) though.
At 48, the best advice I can give is never turn down an opportunity. If your boss offers you a detail in another group, take it. If your invited to a party, go. If your considering taking a chance on something new, take it. Also, remove the social media apps.
You're advice is spot on. Take opportunities when they present themselves. I'm 46 and only now I'm learning to take action and make changes to my life.
I'm 22 and I already feel like it's too late, I barely even adulted. I feel like there's so much pressure too, so we have to be compassionate with ourselves and have faith in our journey, it's definitely not easy though, but still we have to try. And focus on the things that bring us joy, we are our best selves when we are stress free just doing things for the sake of having fun. Sending love and strength to all of us.
At least you figured out you should do things that being you joy. I realised that too late. I'm now struggling with my physical and mental health trying to make everyone else but me happy
@@anweshakar146 yes well, it's easy to speak, the truth is it's way harder to practice these things BUT I at least try. I live with a debilitating chronic illness depression and trauma and everything is a challenge but I make a lot of effort to at least try. It's never too late 🤍. My dad finished 12th year (highschool) when he was 50 and pursued a a degree and career in architecture and he made it. We all have different paces and that's okay. Don't be discouraged and just try to do your best. It's a struggle, it's not easy but if you make an effort it's better than not trying at all. Make your own life easier by being healthy, and doing small things that make you feel good and be compassionate with yourself, maybe get professional help, but never forget there are infinite paths you can choose, there's always a solution out there and maybe you just haven't found it yet. 🤍 effort is never in vain because at least you proved yourself how much you're trying. Sending love to you and hoping you feel a little hopeful after this message. You're not alone, it's a process 🌸 explore your life
I'm 38 and am further behind in life than everyone I know or have known. Nothing has worked out for me and it feels like the universe gets off on going to extreme lengths to make sure nothing will work out. Everything I've tried has failed and I really don't know what to even attempt anymore because the message the universe has sent me over and over is that if I try something or go for something, it will make my life worse. The irony is this guy who just turned 30 already has almost 1 millions subs, so not sure he's really talking from the heart here.
*updated* 1. Stop telling teens and young people that “this is the best time of their life” - it’s not helpful (generally but especially) for those who are in abusive families or who are socially lonely or anxious or feel like their youth is for some other reason difficult 2. Start talking about how age doesn’t matter and that your best years are ahead of you. Help other people look forward to growth, not back at youth. Highschoolers are brainwashed into believing that they’re going to be worthless if they don’t pick the perfectly right career immediately and taking time off is treated as a death sentence. To any middle schooler or high schooler just chill out. Your 20s are hard but if you spend them figuring out who you are, what you want, and what you love your 30s start to feel reeeeeally good and that’s just the beginning of your life, honestly. Update: To everyone below who has shared their story thank you for your contribution to this thread. I am happy that I was able to put into words what so many of you were feeling. I hope that those of you who this has resonated with will share this thought with anyone who you can, and especially those who you hear repeating this useless phrase.
this hit home i swear, i just turned 18 and boy all the jazz about picking a major/ applying to unis is just so stressful, thank you for giving me hope ❤
This is very true. People think high school, college and twenties are best times of their lives but I would disagree. I always considered myself a late bloomer. I'm in my thirties right now and I'm the most confident I've ever been. I'm in the best physical and mental health shape, I have a stable job and have a nice load of emergency funds, and looking forward to creating my own health business with my boyfriend once he graduates next year from doctorate program. I also don't have a reason to compare myself to others as well because I've learned to love the person I've become and be proud of all the barriers I've overcame in the past leading up to this point.
Sometimes it’s better to follow your own calling in your own terms if you can. Our society definitely prioritizes productivity in ways that are not always great for our mental health
Yeah i’m 18 and everyone here in nc drives and most have there own car and here i am with no permit or license bc something always comes in the way when i’m on the path to start.
Yes. 28. I feel like I'm a prisoner in my body, I can't express or compete in society, I can do everything that does not involve socializing well. The minute I have to socialize, I shut down. I live in my room, in my head on the internet. I don't have friends, I don't have a hobby.
This video is very important for me, I've watched it many times since you've uploaded it. I'm 34 years old and I've struggled with depression, unbearable aggressions and jealousy and anxiety for my whole life, went from therapy to therapy till I had to go to a psychiatric hospital for three months last year, cause I couldn't handle myself anymore. At that point I gained deeper insights into me and my problems than ever before, and now, at 34 years old, I'm able to slowly start the journey. While all of my friends and many other people at my age have built up their careers, are talking about their kids and nursery school places and even think about building houses, I begin to earn my first little money, try to find my first girlfriend in life (had my first date one week ago and it was horrible...) and live in my first own tiny cheap apartment. I still have to develope a lot of self-compassion and patience for myself but the thought, that I only have to compare myself with my yesterday-me is a very, very important anchor in my life. Thx for the video!
The best thing I ever did for myself was leave social media and start working on my own problems. It will hit you how profoundly unimportant other people are when you don't force yourself to see them through a screen everyday.
I agree. Spending the day on social media you become a spectator of other people’s life instead of living yours. The only social media I have is RU-vid and I keep it because I need for my studies. 🙂
correction.. only just starting to understand what life is really like because no one ever bothered to tell you and they all thought it was super funny to lie to you in your developmental years and then laugh at you while they watched you struggling to realize whats really going on.. yay parents and authority.. without them who would be our enemies?
@@thothheartmaat2833 you are absolutely correct. thank you for the kind reframe, stranger. i dont think my parents meant to raise me ignorantly, but damn, the world is crazy.
I’m 33 but I’ve felt behind since I was 14. Now I’m aware of it and trying to change my attitude. What helps me is observing my experiences and how I’ve been changing and realizing I was actually unable to do certain things earlier. I wasn’t mentally ready.
Maby if your parents had £100.000 to spend on drama school for you then you could be like Dua Lipa or Ed Sheeran Rich children to start with, they know money already and know how to make more.
I'm also 30 and turned 30 2 months ago, I've been trying to cope with not having the life I thought I would by now. However what I do have now is much more meaningful than what I did at 20
All the kids that end up having huge success do so because of rich parents simple as that, Adel, Amy Winehouse, Jorge Esra, Dua Lipa, Ed Sheeran, all went to £100.000 a year drama and proforming arts schools, that's why they are famous, Me from My poor council estate chance to ever get there success is next to zero.
I recently went back to college at almost 30 years old, seeing all of my peers set in their careers, buying homes, having children has really knocked me down. This video helped a lot. Thank you ❤️
My mom when she was forty decided to go for her dreams and got herself a MA degree in psychology. She was able to quit working in a hospital as a nurse and now, after more than a decade, she's never been happier with her work. She goes to seminars, reads books about it and keeps growing. She's a big encouragement to me, just starting my own career path at almost 30. :)
"I'm 30 and I've only just started taking my life seriously." OOF! I felt that. 31 and FINALLY started taking care of my body, learning a second language and started flight school (you know... planes). I didn't feel like an adult before then. This video is amazing. Thanks mate!
I relate to what you said 100%. In my mind, the 20s were just the good times, with very limited objectives for the future. About 6 months ago, i started feeling the heat: What the hell am i doing with my life?? Fast forward to two weeks ago, the time was done: I had officially finished the 20s, and now started the 30s. I can safely say that i too, FINALLY started to take care of myself (better diet, more exercise), think of the future, put goals, plan ahead, start investing, etc... so bottom line: Super glad you got to this stage as well, i know it's frightening, but it is also amazing that you are looking forward to improving your life! Cheers
Had to comment here, not to make fun of you, or one up you anything of that sort but you said you started flight school, to give you some inspiration maybe, my brother 10yrs younger then me always knew what he wanted to do, started flying at age 13. He got into flight school (Embry Riddle Aeronautical University) after high school, and then spent 4 yrs there, graduated then stayed another 2yrs as an instructor. When he first got there after high school he had more flying hours then most people there because my mother would take him weekly to the local airport to fly like cessnas and stuff. To this day for the past i think 8yrs, now at age 36 hes a pilot of his own 737 and flies all around the USA, dude is smart as hell too. The kid even trumps me with things but its funny as he calls me up for know how on various things i know, lol Thing to keep in mind is everyone is on their own journey, their own path, we all were born at different times, have different parents, our bodies, personalities, smarts, fitness, health, skills and what have you are all different. To make comparisons with another is not realistic as we are all not the same, best thing you can do is to be yourself and do your thing, take note what others have done, know, and are capable of and if you can learn from them for what your trying to do then their example can help you further your quest if you will. As Bruce Lee once said "My truth is not your truth, and your truth is not mine".
@@Gunter_Severloh Haha. Yeah, my instructor is around 8 years my junior and she can make a Cessna dance in the sky like it's nothing. It was a bit jarring when I asked her if she remembered Y2K (there was a point to the convo) and she responded with no. Haha! I was always interested in flying (I think since I was 6 or 7 years old), but the opportunity hadn't presented itself until now. Your brother is indeed inspirational as he was able to follow his heart's desire sooner than I. Good for him and good on you for being there and proud of him. Thank you for your inspirational comment.
I used to compare myself a lot, but now I just compare myself to where I was 5 years ago. I am not super rich or successful, but as long as I keep moving forward then that is something.
24 y/o just started a new study with mostly 18 y/o classmates I feel like I’ve wasted years of my life and want to give up every day but I keep going you should not compare your journey to someone else’s you never know what will come onto your path
Hey, I am exactly doing the same. I started learning what kids of age 15-16 learn about. I managed to get a job within 1 year of studying. If you ever wonder if its worth the struggle, mark my words. It is completely worth it. I still celebrate where I was compared to where I am. I am not doing great but doing much better than I would have had I not studied.
If you want to hear this, I went back to university at 24 in Software engineering. I'm turning 27 this year and I might graduate with Honours. I might get into internships at Intel or into really great university on scholarships. You are not too old. You can still not just make a decent living, you can achieve greatness.
Please just know that it isn’t your fault that you feel like this. You’re learning to improve your wellbeing on a path to success. Sometimes life gets in the way…and there’s nothing wrong with that when we have the rest of it to live, right?
Wow. Thank you! But this shouldn't really be the case, because we are all on different paths at different times. Some of us seem to 'lag' behind, and then 'catch up' later, while others have their 'big break's' earlier and then petter out later.
As a young mom, I definitely feel behind. I'm 30 and searching for internships... I feel embarrassed because that's what a 20 years old would do, and my 30 years old peers already have important jobs and positions, not to mention they have their life all figured out. It's the shame for some reason. I'm introvert, dyslexic, add, fighting depression and anxiety... So you can imagine how inadequate I feel. But I try not think about it and move on. It's hard.
Every day is a new day, take it one step at a time. You have no reason to feel embarrassed about the effort you're putting into your life. We're all 'behind' in one way or another, it's a matter of who or what you're comparing yourself to. Just stay focused on your goals and try to minimize the distractions in life. God bless
I went back to school at 30 so was doing internships in my 30s with 20 year olds. Sometimes the supervisors or coordinators were younger than me. It's easy to feel out of place for sure, but think that it's an opportunity you didn't have before. Also, I played up my age (ahem experience). At least in the types of internships I was applying for, being the older student made me stand out in the selection process. Best of luck!
I started working on my first degree at 41 years and will graduate this year finishing the final units after 4 years exactly. Opening doors and getting success in IT work. That was after 5 years of unemployment and almost 2 years in low manual labour jobs. After 8 years of retirement on a beach in the tropics and 7 years of working in IT. EVERYONE is on their OWN TIMELINE. Everything that has lead up to this moment has been preparing me. Both the highs and lows.
The thing that bothers me is not that I'm not where I thought I would be. It's that people are supportive of young people and not older people. For instance, when a child starts their own business, everyone wants to buy in to support said child and encourage them. When an adult starts their own business, all their friends and family want a discount or special deal to avoid paying full price. It baffles me that you want to make a child rich but you don't care if your adult friend does well.
Yeah I understand this for sure. I think people have this idea that adults don't need help or support coz they have it all figured out, whereas kids don't. It's absolutely not true, most adults don't have things figured out and support and help from those around them is actually very necessary, but nobody wants to give it and nobody wants to outright ask for it. It's a weird world. This is from someone who's been trying for almost 2 years to get my artwork and my handmade jewellery out there but is screaming into the wind because the only person seeing and sharing my work is my own mother.
@@PeachyYummy24 I feel you. I had a friend who got a peddlers license in college so she could set up a stand outside on the sidewalk downtown to sell her artwork. It worked! But still.
@@PeachyYummy24 may i see your artwork and handmade jewellery? I totally get it, it is much harder for some people to constantly ask for help, which results in skills with no exposure to the whole world. I wonder how many skilled people are extraordinary but their skills and passion have turned into mere hobbies, or even sadder, a memory of their past. Kinda reminds of that beginning scene from Up
I understand what you have went through. Anyone can tolerate this for just one day. If you refuse the next day then you soon have to prepare for struggle. One of those customers may happy to see your business in bad shape. But strange to see it less happens to younger business these days. Maybe it's a good start for early but not for a long term in my opinion. It is really wrong to discriminate people business by making age part of the reason for this decision. I have seen this before and ended up in a short time. If you don't taste the upside down business and bad situation, you're going down for sure. Just keep it up. Don't give up 👍
"Oh you know. I'm only 30 and I'm just now taking my self seriously 😅 huh ha" that made me laugh hard asf. I'm 35 and I felt that to the core. I just started taking my life seriously 7 months ago. Self love and meditation has saved me. But I'm still struggling with "successfulness"
The people He mentioned are all from wealthy families and they went to proforming arts school costing minimum £100.000 a year, Ed Sheeran, Adel, Dua Lipa bought and payed for to be famous.
20 y/o male - I’m at a spot in my life where I almost fully love and respect myself and mostly others as well, but I’m still living with my parents and feel that I don’t have control over my own life, they’ve raised me extremely satisfactory. They taught me how to be grateful for everything they provide and the help others give, but never taught me how to live on my own nor any work ethics and habits. I don’t use social media aside from youtube, but I also don’t socialize in person. I understand that I have extreme potential in this world, but when I feel like I don’t have control it is so difficult to progress. It feels like I don’t have the right to be upset at anything and that I’m just stuck being physically satisfied, while the people around me continue to grow in life, I continue to sit here in my house like a bum. Typing it all out makes it seem like I am just ungrateful, I’m at one of the lowest points in my mental health, but I’m finally getting the help I need and I’m starting to feel better. Watching this helps me understand more of what is going on in my head, why I think about the things I do, and how to start to change small things in my life to open up more opportunities for myself to experience what it’s like to do something new on my own. I appreciate your perspective on life, and I’ll do my best to implement your wisdom into my self-care journey :) For anyone else who needs to hear this, you’re loved and you can change all the bad in your life. It might seem impossible, but with time and perseverance, getting out of the environment that conditioned you to stay in a bad spot is very possible, whether it be physically or mentally, they are both just as important and real. If you need to talk to someone, please don’t hold it in until you break, let someone know, whether that he your family, friends, random people on the internet, writing it down and throwing it away, anything to get those thoughts outside of your mind, the only reason it’s eating inside your head, is because it is inside your head. Anyways, I love you, person reading this, if you feel like you can’t go to anyone, feel very much welcome yo leave a message in my reply, whether to ask for help or to just get things off your chest, I don’t judge.
19 y/o female. I’m in a very similar boat as you. I have great parents and have had a great life. I haven’t had a job yet so it’s difficult to figure out all I need to do to get hired. It’s also difficult not knowing what I want to do because I don’t have a specific path I want to work on. I feel behind in life, but I’ve used my time since high school to improve myself. I have been running every other day for the past few weeks. Running helps my physical and mental health a ton. I’m not sure if I want to go to college or go into a trade. I’ve been leaning more towards a trade. Electrical work or carpentry/woodwork would be awesome but I always push it off or become frustrated when I try to figure out how to do so. I have to persevere through it or talk to someone who has some connections.
I’m in a very similar situation- still living with parents as 22y/o female, doing college and having a low minimum wage job. Didn’t really learn much about living, work, and social habits either. I’m super appreciative my parents are letting me stay here while I’m going to school, but I feel like I never really got to explore what it was like to be independent. I never learned how to drive and I was pretty isolated as a kid, even with having an older sibling (he is 10y/o than me & as I was growing up he was kind of having his antsy teenage phase, so it was hard to connect with him.) Due to this I was home practically alone a lot of the time. Though now I can technically leave the house & explore my life, mentally I feel like there’s a chain and ball weighing down preventing me to because of my upbringing. My mental health is also pretty bad and I also suspect I might have some undiagnosed disorder that I’m unaware of, probably autism. I graduate in spring and I have no fucking idea how I’m going to survive when it feels like I can barely perform basic adulting as is. Do you have any tips for finally pushing yourself towards getting clinical help? I know I need it I just. I’m holding myself back for some reason and I need to make my brain to switch & realize I need to take the leap. Even if not, I just wanna say thank you because this was nice to put into words some of the things I’ve been thinking about.
hey! this reply is a year after from your original comment. Your comment sounded like you were struggling with developing your own autonomy. Firstly, I hope you're feeling free to want more out of life. Wanting more out of life isn't bad or ungrateful. It's your life, you're allowed to have autonomy. Secondly, parents getting your needs met is bare minimum. Even if they have a difficult life because they sacrifice so much for their kid(s), that is their choice, and it's not your responsibility. It is healthy and considerate to be grateful, but not healthy to hang it over your head. There are a lot of responsibilities to being a loving parent (such as emotional support, encouragement, teaching self care, cleanliness, interpersonal relationships, emotional regulation, et cetera.) Ideally parents or family or friends can show you how to provide for yourself and ideally encourage you to go after what you want out of life. If not, there are helpful resources and groups online. For example, if you don't know how to do a process, you're not alone! People have made videos on how to order food out, how to pay a bill, or how to make a dr appointment, how to take the bus, how to sign up for classes, et cetera. I think it's worth looking into the tasks you want to accomplish, one at a time, then looking them up online. writing down any questions you have. You can generally call the office of whatever you're doing and kindly ask if someone has time to walk you through a process. That's generally what I have done. You can also respond and I will see if I can explain it if I can't find a video about it. I hope I understood your message well enough and that my response is relevant and helpful!
Hey @@april_ way to go in figuring out where you're at! Running is a blast, I'm glad you've found something that makes you happy. It's been a year since your comment, I see, so I hope that you have been able to take one step toward trade lyfe, so you can find out if that's the path you want to take. I have limited experiences with trades, other than make sure you're stretching and taking safety steps and good care for your body. It's okay to ask questions of the people interviewing you. It's important tha tyou know what you're getting into, for sure. I've found some videos. ofpeople in the field discussing the pros and cons, what they would've like to know before hand and how much it's changed their life. I bet if you find a video it might help you figure out which direction is for you. You got this! You can take that step, I believe in you!
@@auradorkable This comment actually makes me want to cry, it’s so kind. A little over a year ago, I interviewed for a job at a custom door shop, got the job for the first interview I’ve ever done! This job has made me realize I really do love woodworking and want to continue doing this type of work throughout my life. Through work I’ve learned quite a lot, I use the skills to make projects at home as well. It’s not an easy job, but it’s rewarding especially since I work in the custom department. We get higher end orders that sometimes get sent to Hawaii. Doors are surprisingly interesting, it’s something you don’t really think about until you know the amount of work that goes into it. It takes strength, endurance, and patience. My coworkers are awesome too, everyone is pleasant to be around
I’m 36 and spent years 18-30 just “hangin out”, drinking a LOT, partying etc. had lots of fun but ultimately felt EXTREMELY behind at around 31 years old. Well long story short, I dramatically slowed down my drinking, went back to school (nursing, almost done in 6 months), found a good girl, stopped being available 24/7 for all my “party friends”, and now I’m actually focused on myself. Yes I wish I got the memo earlier in life but I’m on point now and that’s more than good enough. “The best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, the second best time is now”
That's actually the dream of anyone who grew up watching skins or shows like that. Kinda jealous of you ngl. But I'm glad you feel you're doing the right thing for the time
@@walissongs Yeah you can't party forever man, I did it and I got it out of my system, now it's time to build something and plan for later years. Thanks for commenting.
Same, albeit on an even later timescale. I didn't get moving until i was like 32, i still went to parties 3-4 times a month up until my 32nd or sth. Now 6 years, I have a job with prospects, a house, a wife, reconnected with decent friends, not just the party people( I still see some of them regularly).
@@rey_nemaattori took me till 32 almost to get any momentum, so I’m right there with you (not that it matters the exact age so much) it’s just good to catch on, I see many older guys still partying and bs’ing into later years. I also still hang out w my party friends, they’re my best friends, but some have gone by the wayside because we didn’t have anything else in common besides partying. It’s part of growth. Anyway Take care
Very insightful. Thank you for this. As a 52 year-old female currently attending school to become a therapist, I suddenly don’t feel so bad about being a late bloomer. 😉✌🏼🦋🌸☮️
I'm 25 and thinking of going back to school next year (I dropped out at 16 because of mental illness). It's still difficult for me to deal with failure and with being disappointed in myself, but therapy has really helped and will continue to do so. It's inspiring to me that you're doing this in your own time, and you've also chosen to do a profession that helps others in a truly meaningful way.
25 and never have gone to school.. one time I tried as an adult ..didn’t go well lol ima a late bloomer aswell lol I hope I can go to college next year for IT. It’s great to read about your experience cause it gives me hope too
I'm so happy for you! I'm 21 and only now starting to figure out my life and I'm considering going for social work but a friend who's the same age already has her Master's in social work which discourages me because I feel a bit pathetic in comparison. But your story reminds me that everyone's story is different, everybody's on their own track, and comparing yourself to societal norms just devalues who you are.
Nice Katie ;) my mother is your same age, i wish she could have this willpower, she gave up even on her health!!!!! Keep fighting Katie, and god bless you.
@@politemenace5781 happened something same to me, i totally can relate, i started taking care of my parents working 9-5 while studying engineering, i couldn't keep up with this life and be fast in my university, lost a lot of years felt in depression and now im 27 and about to finally graduate ad march. My 2 cents for dealing with this crippling mentality of failure, as bigger brother : 1 Do a sport. Expeciallly walking/running but if you have enough strength do even something more difficult. 2 Discipline, you want to set the clock at one time, eat at one time, sleep at one time. 3 You can't find motivation if your brain thinks you are a failure, so u need to chest the A hole (because your brain isn't "you" the yiu is the conscious, but 90% is out of your control) how do you cheat your brain? Thats i scared of failure? Habits. You study half h and increase 5 min every week. Ofc what i said has it's reason, i can relate to yours experience 100% so i neded a lot to find my answers, the answer is cheating my own brain. Fear causes low motivation and willpower, for cheating it you need to make something an habit, then make it yours. Just be careful, if you have the sense of failure even little bit, the enemy is not outside is in your Brain. Sorry for bad English.
Age is just a number. Never too late to take action for something that you always wanted to do. Start to trust yourself, instead of hanging on to insecurities. You live now, now it's gonna happen. Be confident, keep on telling yourself the most positive words, because there's only one like you. Later on you will be so proud that you left the negative behind.
I was just let go from work. I started to scroll through RU-vid while processing this life event. This hit me in the feels. Makes me feel better. Thanks!
I had this problem when I was a child! I went to a highly competitive school and I had no family support and an abusive home. All my classmates were rich or well off, had loving families or at least some kind of community support, and were getting ready to grow. It seemed like everyone else was getting straight A's and getting written about in the paper. Now, in adulthood, they have successful careers and lives and I've always felt so separate from them -- thinking of comparison slots is helpful! It's important to not compare myself to them -- they all had life boats heading towards the shore of success and they did work hard. I was still building a raft from scratch when I entered into adulthood, alone, sabotaged, and abused. So yeah, great video! Thank you!
Ohhh I feel that! Abusive households can make you feel like you're years behind because it takes time to recover and the starting point is different. We got this 💪🏽
I really resonated with that. Abusive families really set you back a lot. Quite a few people think of me a someone who isn't rushed and they don't understand why i'm not doing things like "normal" people. Even when i explain, they don't really get it and they think it's laziness or doing things too slowly. It's very annoying being misunderstood and judged by people who basically have no serious problems in their lives and have no empathy.
Life gets ten times easier when you master the art of minding your business unless whatever you are focusing on serves you. I am happy with my life, because I don't watch videos about peoples lives, nor care about the lives of celebrities and I just mind my business and keep my mind on me and my skills.
I'm only young but I feel like I'm behind all the time. Every since I was as a kid, I kept thinking of what I'm missing and questioning if I am doing things wrong. I keep comparing myself to younger people who are more successful than me. I have some high expectations due to society which affected how I think of the world. Someone from my age got hired from the person who's a businessman. I wished I was better than I was. I could be doing things I wanted to do if I was better. This video have opened my mind. I think I will keep going on my day. I need to sort out my priorities and expectations. Enjoy your day people! One day, I will be successful.
Ironically the most inspiring thing for me in this video was "I'm 30 and I only just started taking my life seriously." It was relatable and made me feel like it's not just me.
I'm 53 yrs old next month, my life has only started 3 years ago...I never thought it would ever start. It is never too late, as long we don't give up and keep trying different ways to get it right and where we want to be. It is all about perception
For me it all started working out when I stopped competing and started focusing on what made me happy. I work for me, make me happy, need my own approval. I do not need to be a billionaire or mega famous. I want to be happy, be able to do something meaningful and help people along the way, and having extra money to spend. And it's working.
Finally met my future wife once I stopped worrying about being good enough and just started focusing on enjoying my life as much as I could. No, I'm not rich nor am I powerful. Life for me is a constant struggle...but it's my life to live and I just want to enjoy every good moment in it. It was then when a beautiful young woman walked into my life who wants to do the same thing. She struggles too, just as I do...but wants to enjoy every good moment she gets as much as she can. I was 36, she had recently turned 33...I'm now 38 and just celebrated her 35th birthday with a proposal. We won't have it easy...but we will make it fun. That's what really matters in the end.
@@christopheralthouse6378 keep in mind, struggles mixed with efforts and discipline, turn into successes if you work smart and keep pushing for better. It's a marathon not a race. All the best and congrats on the engagement!
@@dictabeat Thanks a million! ☺️😁 And I definitely get that now...like everyone, I too faced the harsh pressure to succeed as quickly as possible when I was in High School. I was told constantly how important it is to get into college immediately, even better if I could enter college BEFORE finishing High School (dual-enrollment, like teens don't have enough pressure on them as it is, let's also push them to take college classes AND High School classes so they can be rich and successful FASTER because how dare anyone just want to enjoy being a teen? OUTRAGEOUS! 😵😅). Then, you're also feeling pressure from peers to find a good girlfriend that you can marry right after you graduate because OF COURSE you must start a family right away before you're too old, who cares if you really know yourself yet? Don't you know that it isn't real love unless you marry your High School sweetheart? Oh, don't have one yet because no one's interested in you? Sucks to be you then...you should've been richer or more athletic or got into that dual-enrollment program because chicks dig that. But, that's okay...just enter the military, women love a man in uniform too! Can't handle the strenuous training of Basic? Damn...guess you'll just be perpetually broke with no career, no wife and no kids because there's just NO way you could ever have a fulfilling life because everyone else is just gonna pass you by... Then I see people who did all those things...and they're in a mountain of debt, the career went nowhere, they wound up divorced with kids and MOUNTAINS of baggage, high stress and ultimately unhappy. Those who went through with the military route now suffer from PTSD along with multiple other mental health problems because of what they faced...and many of them also wound up divorced on top of that. It's awful the pressure kids face growing up and the worst of it all is that they're basically being lied to the entire time...but how can anyone know any better when their teachers push it, their parents push it, their church leaders push it, their friends push it...and being still impressionable, many wind up mentally, emotionally and sometimes even physically damaged as a result. I say this...just do YOU. Enjoy your teen years, make what friends you can and then, once you graduate and enter the real world, take some time to find your own path. If that path is college, then go for it. If it's a vocation, go for that. If it's just simply getting into the work force while you gradually discover yourself, go for it. Just figure yourself out so you can know what you really want out of life. Mistakes will be made... it's a part of living, no one's perfect and no one's right all of the time. You may find yourself working a crummy job, or find yourself getting a degree that you can't really use, or dating someone who just isn't right for you...but that's okay. We learn more from our mistakes than we do from our successes. In my case, I have two ex-girlfriends who were both disasters. I looked at both failures and learned more about myself, in terms of where I'm really able to contribute and where I may need some help to grow. I learned what I need from whoever was going to be my future spouse. I began to understand what negative traits I can work with and which ones I can't, while also coming to better understand what positive traits are going to stand out for me the most and may even help balance out the negative. One big thing I discovered was the one thing that had really scuppered my previous attempts at finding someone... it's always when I make the first move. I get too eager and that in turn makes me come off creepy even though I'm not trying to be. So...I ultimately decided to stop making the first move. Any woman who wanted me was going to have to show it by making that first move herself. I knew that may be a risky tactic, I was taking the control away from myself in the hopes that the right woman would actually take that initiative...but I decided to trust in it since me trying to control this process was delivering 100% fail. Continuing along that same tac would be insanity at this point. When my fiancee and I first met, I found it especially easy to not show interest because, quite frankly, I wasn't at all interested. She worked under me at the time which raises its own issues in that respect...however, it also didn't help that she was unreliable, irresponsible and argumentative to boot. I was constantly being forced to try to counsel her on these issues and hitting a brick wall each and every time. Every time she locked her keys in the car and thus couldn't come to work...or she overslept because she didn't set her alarm...or got lost trying to find the site...yeah, she was a piece of work and I DEFINITELY didn't need to go down that rabbit hole...😵 But then my boss had me train her on a certain detail we had where she needed to patrol on board a ship, hitting certain checkpoints along the way. Again... wasn't looking forward to it but hopefully we can get through this without an argument. I wasn't sure what I was about to face tbh but really just hoping I can get through it with my sanity intact. Well...she took that night and proceeded to just completely change my perception of her by hitting the one area that definitely would make me notice her in a positive light...she cracked jokes. Literally. She had me laughing the whole time that I'm touring her through the ship. That soon leads to me cracking jokes with her too as I have a quirky sense of humor myself and LOVE to laugh! 😅😂 This woman who I once saw as just a royal pain showed herself to be so much more than that...she was smart and had that same quirky sense of humor that I have. In short... she's FUN! 😁 Then... right after the training, she changes everything again by doing the very thing that I was hoping someone would do. She made the first move by asking me out. We had our first date the following morning after she got off-duty. That was Christmas Week 2019 and she's been my greatest Christmas present ever since. I took time to figure myself out and she had done much the same thing. Sure, we were both now in our 30s but we had figured out what we wanted and she had the guts to go for it. The same strong will that made her argumentative made her go for the man that she realized she wanted and damn the consequences...and that man is me. And no, she isn't perfect. She can still be irresponsible at times and her argumentative streak still shows itself to this day...but I already knew about those traits when she asked me out and I said yes. Our faults have never been hidden from each other...yet we continue going strong because at the end of it all, we both want the same thing. A fun life. One that will include children one day who will share in the fun. Fun that we can have all the way into actual old age. Sure...in some respects, life may have passed us by at some point. But...maybe that's because everyone else is simply going too fast. We still got there... In all good time. ☺️😁😍
Hearing you call social media "the devil apps" for some reason makes me feel very happy. I can relate because I have always wanted to draw good and always compared myself to literally every other art classmate I've ever had since I could draw at all. Now, looking at legendary artist/animators like Alan Becker and his billions of views for just stick figures that he began at 17 makes me feel so inadequate since I'm 5 years older and have done absolutely nothing like that. Thank you for freeing me.
Thanks, this is like one video that I have watched without pausing or any distractions u coz the advice is relatable and solid-short-quick and actually appeals to me. Living with Adhd, depression and whatnot at 22 feels exhausting already. This type of content feels like a logical solution to y miseries and my hopes are amplified.
Everyone is trying to live their best life. Once I started reminding myself of this, that helped me a lot with comparison and jealousy. Someone else's win is not your loss, just focus on yourself and make your best life (and that usually doesn't mean money and fame)
@@badass6300 I guess in the most grand scheme of things yes, but it should be more of a mindset. That saying is figurative, like when someone else succeeds, don't bring yourself down because of it, simply move on with your own goals.
i think the point is theres no line for anyone to be ahead or behind. you’re the very first (and the only!) person living your life, your timing is the only one that exists that’s completely unique to you
You may only feel like you're behind because of how society has been created and founded and solidified into an adamantly specific formula that it demands us to follow. Find something that interests you and do that thing, fulfill your curiosities, try a bunch of hobbies. I know there are still necessities that need to be taken care of in order to survive in this society, but try to find things that you enjoy, even if just to get you through the day. It's not our fault we were born, and it's not fair if we can't find some form of happiness every day.
We are all at different stages. You feel like you are behind because you can see someone in front of you. But to the people who are behind you, you look like you are in front. We can't all be at the same place at the same time. Wherever you are in life right now, try to make the best of it. This moment is the only one we have and when it's over nothing will matter anymore. I hope you live a long, healthy and happy life.🍀
Thank you for the wisdom from a bigger brother it means alot. I think we are sometimes brainwashed from childhood into what success is . The comparison and belittling from childhood makes one to feel low and be hard on ourselves. Thank you 🌺❤
I am going to be 41 yo in couple of months. And I think to have a long break from my current job to go back to school. You all could always start again no matter what. You Got This!!!
Who needs Instagram or social media when you have cousins who go to med school, are becoming accountants and software developers while you have no idea what you're doing and your parents keep comparing you to other family members and people.
But why are all of you so upset? Because some dipshit kid got a Jeep and you didn't? Who cares? It's just a car. I got rid of all of my social media accounts about two years ago (coincidentally, when everyone was going gung-ho on Trump, etc.) and have never been happier. I go to the fitness centre happy, knowing that I am doing what I do for ME and only ME, and NOT for my stupid followers on Instagram or RU-vid. I go out to eat and I order whatever the fuck I want and I enjoy the shit out of it, because it's what I want, for ME. I'm not going to order something that tastes like absolute shit, but at least it looks pretty!, so that I can snap a photo and post it to my social media feeds. Next time you feel down about yourself, just remember that these are all just personas. They are masks that these kids / influencers put on in order to mask the sad, sad reality of their pathetic lives. Your life is not going to be better if it were YOU in that new Jeep, because then, you're just going to look over to the next jagoff to your left with the Ferrari or Mustang, and you will fall into the same pattern. Love yourself and do what YOU want to do, that's the key to happiness. :)
@Wyatt Brunow, if that’s not sarcasm, then you’re welcome. 🙂 If there’s anything to take away from this, is that, just remember, you may be in your 2001 Platina looking over at that kid with the Jeep to the left, but that kid doesn’t notice you because he’s looking towards *his* left at the guy with the red Corvette. Never ever assume that someone’s life is perfect based on material possessions. They probably lead a life just as shitty as yours, but with the addition of a Jeep. 😉
@Wyatt Brunow but that’s a wild assumption. You don’t know that teenagers struggles or what they did to get that jeep. Everyone assumes everything was handed to someone because you’re stuck in a miserable mindset. I’m not saying that to be cruel either, I used to think just like this in my younger years. I was super bitter and jealous of those around me for what they had. But what I didn’t know is until I met people like that, that the struggles many of them faced to get there were quite rough. I only viewed life with a superficial level, but it’s not that black and white. Many deserve the things they worked hard for, and sometimes people just get lucky. Instead of being salty, create your own happiness. Don’t worry about those around you, be happy for them if that’s what makes them happy. I know it’s easier said than done, but make small changes now for a better future it’s never too late. You seem bitter about your job, find something better, make your own position. The problem is people give up and settle. And again, I know it’s easier said than done, but complaining on RU-vid about some teens doesn’t make your life situation any better or different.
I cried like a baby last night. I compare myself to everyone. I feel so behind in life and that I should be somewhere where everyone else is. My anxiety is awful, my depression is worsening but this video really helped. I’m so thankful I found your page.
Tbh, I'm also crying like a baby rn. I think I have been crying for 3 hrs and counting. Life is hard. I'm relieved to know that I'm not the only one feeling like this. I hope we all get through this.
@@necadrateescabarte82 you’re not the only one I’m 28, no job no money no car. All I have is the hope of discipline to get my shit together x oh and God
Delete social media. Pretty much cured my mental health problems when ur not constantly scrolling through fake version of everyone else’s lives. Really allowed me to focus on myself and come into my own. Hope u get better ❤️
I´ve been bingewatching your videos for the past three days and it really changed my perspective on like LIFE and so many situations where i´m just standing in my own way. You really motivate me but at the same time make me feel okay with changes taking time and not yet beeing where i want to be? I usually don´t write comments but what ever "having a hard time" means I feel like that and really don´t know where I am in live right now or where i want to be, but your videos/ thoughts and ideas on stuff really help. I hope this makes sense, but i just wanted to say thank you for making such meaningful "content". Have a great day!
Comparison is the thief of joy. Be careful what you imagine as the brain can't tell what is real or fake. That is why it's so easy to trick yourself into anxiety.
@@secretnobody6460 85% of what we worry about doesn't happen. You can watch a good show or workout and trick yourself into peace. Which sounds weird tricking yourself into happiness, but it makes sense when we trick ourselves into anxiety by imagining the worst. Visualize positive situations instead, your brain doesn't know what's real and what's imaginary
@@reptilesgamers00 yeah, i find myself feeling better when doing something productive. Or just entertaining myself with games and movies. Social media and idleness is the culprit of making me feel that im missing out. Thanks
This is sooooooo freaking good thank you sooo much for making this video, which has been in my recommended for weeks, I guess RU-vid reeeeeeally wanted me to hear this. My power word for 2023 is SELF LOVE and I'm turning 51 this year, and really get it now. No more hiding because I don't feel up to par with all the younger, attractive, healthy, neuro typical all the things..... I'm just me, and I struggle a LOT in life, and I'm going to let everything I create be an expression of who I am and connect with others as I am. Keeping it real. No energy to do it any other way. God bless.
I'm 24 and I've felt this nearly every day for years, and honestly, its making me feel suicidal... I could've been such a better person. Such a more successful person...
I had this mindset too. But then I looked at succesful people and thought, is success equal to happiness? In life we have many regrets. But we should always live in the present and move on. Do what you love, be happy. Be helpful and nice to others. Do exercise, find a hobby. Go out in nature. Or even read a book. There is meaning in happyness. "The meaning of life is not to be a succesfull person, it is to be a precious person."
I was looking for someone my age here. i was, or still am feeling pretty crazy. I’m just vowing to try to be better than i was yesterday. We got this! everything is temporary, even this.
“I’m 30 and I’ve just started taking my life seriously” I’m 29 and I’ve taken my entire life seriously. which, as it turns out, doesn’t actually lead to success and causes you to miss out on all the fun parts of being a young idiot. Think you made the right call, bud. EDIT: Sorry this post was a downer, caught me pre-coffee. Glad some of the commenters found some use from this bitchy comment to vent, commiserate, or offer others advice. Be good!
@@blappappa3836 Did the college thing for 5 years because you’re “supposed to”. Dropped out due to being suicidally depressed, overworked and wanting to go in a starving artist/blue collar direction. Figured I was already working full time anyway, usually anywhere between 10-20 days working with one day off in between shifts. Keep in mind that was on top of school. Spent the past 5 years working at a small factory which I’m now the foreman of, and working on my musicianship 5-6 days a week. The latter was about to turn a corner before covid. God knows if I’ll get to be one of the lucky ones who gets to go anywhere with it, but it’s still looking alright as restrictions lift. Didn’t realize how miserable I was until covid lockdowns hit and my life barely changed (minus no more shows) Hope that answered your question lol.
Same. I’m 28 and in my younger years I was so emotionally exhausted. I worked multiple jobs and went to college, after college just worked worked worked. I never partied or enjoyed my summer breaks, I never had time too and was so exhausted. I put on a ton of weight because I didn’t have time to care for myself and wasn’t sleeping well or enough for years. It was hard and I often feel like it tainted my college experience and the years you’re supposed to be having fun… Now that I’m older it’s like no one wants to do those things they got the party big out of their system years ago or doesn’t have the time or I’m just too burned out. It really stinks. Part of me regrets it, but another part of me is like but I’ve put myself in a good and stable spot in my life. So idk 🤷🏻♀️
I truly needed to see this. As someone who loves everything about, Social Media (the connectivity and all that), It can be hard to step back, breathe and feel like you’re doing ok. Especially when it feels like everyone is “ahead” of you. Gonna take it a bit easier now. Focus on me and the relationships I have. Thank you!
I love your humor and authenticity Struthless. Your videos have been a breath of fresh air to me during many a downward spiral, and I hope to some day be able to encourage people like you do.
I started crying when you got to "I wont love myself if I'm not successful". I have so many people that love and support me in my life that are surprised when I tell them how disappointed I am in myself even though I've accomplished so much. Putting it in an "I" term makes me really have to confront that I'm just being extremely unkind to myself
Same man, I honestly hate myself because as someone who just turned 30, I feel like I should've had my life in order & then some. My parents were getting a house built & all this other shit around my age & here I am stuck living with my gf's parents (they cool btw) trying to figure out how to be successful in a world where successful comes with the idea of Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk & all those other celebrities & billionaires. I hate myself because I feel like I should've "made it" by now. I hate myself because I feel stupid compared to anyone else who can do something I can't. I hate myself because I can't make enough money to pay medical bills (like a tooth that I need filled up) where in most cases I get ridiculed by my mother who didn't have to grow up with with economic strife. It makes me feel helpless & useless, something that I grew up to hate. That is why I hate myself.
@@theanimegamer366 I hear you. Having felt this myself after a divorce and near bankruptcy and at my lowest point in life, I had no other option but to turn to God and ask if He really exists, and He showed up. That’s my experience of course, but it completely changed how I see life and how I see “success” and purpose. Very much like the movie The Matrix.
im about to turn 23 and am already feeling this way intensely. seeing everyone around me graduate college and start their careers is wild and pretty demotivating. meanwhile im over here living with my parents, haven't really made a friend or done anything since high school, can barely get up in the morning and am struggling a lot mentally. i know i'm still young but dang. this video helped and i definitely subscribed after seeing it!! :) the homework part is awesome too. it reminded me to focus on my values / do what is meaningful, which i needed. thanks!
Same. I’m 21 and everyone around me is getting into nursing school and already graduating when I wasn’t accepted… it doesn’t help that my parents keep telling me that I’m behind and need to hurry up and become a nurse already
Really needed this comment and video. I'll be turning 22 this year and I'm basically in the same boat as you. I'm in college online through the help of financial aid. But, it's mostly out of societal formality, having something to put on a resumé, and staying occupied. I'm not really satisfied or really sure what to with my life. And I'm frustrated that I don't have the answers. Plus, it seems I'll never really have time to "explore" because of financial instability. I definitely just need to slowly let go of my expectations for timely success and recognize that there's small meaningful lessons I'm requiring during this mundane period of my life.
I completely understand and am sorry you’re dealing with this too. I think we have to remember that we’re not alone and it’s more common than we think! And you have a good point about letting go of expectations and appreciating the lessons :) that’s very true and a reminder I definitely needed
Dude, everyone thought Olivia Jade had all in life until it was discovered her Full House mom begged and bribed Olivia's way into college. Many of these influencers buy supporters, many are not as successful as they seem to the world since many of them commit suicide while apparently having it all. Some of them have connections that allow them to be unfairly successful at a young age.
I’ve come back to this video today and instantly feel recharged and motivated. Thanks for making this video and I hope you are still finding ways to define your own success.
Best timing for a video ever - in the middle of a panic attack about life. I'll take your thoughts away to ponder on and see how it goes, you young famous internet person you.
"Don't let the internet rush you, no one is posting their failures." Maybe as a counter cultural move, I will. Posting our failures and refocusing what is real online
I feel like this is a good idea. I liked the "ugly selfie" idea too. Maybe I ought to post about my wrinkles, because I'm super insecure about them. I don't want to participate in pressuring other women to get inject poison into their skin and spend their entire life savings on erasing lines...
I actually love to share my failures and flaws, along with what I try to do about it. In a world full of showing-off, I like to be open so that people can realize that we're all only human, and that it's great to own your failures & flaw since everyone has that too. It's actually paradoxically me showing off my fearlessness to tell my flaws, hahah. I used to be in a deep abyss of self-esteem issues with depression & suicidal thoughts, and I felt so much better after learning to love myself. It's honestly still unbelievable that I can wake up in the morning at all. I really want to spread this method to joy for others like me too. To not give up on themselves.
At 18 I became a caregiver to my mother that's on dialysis. I don't have a lot of life experience. I'm 32 and sometimes feel trapped and get anxiety playing the comparison game with people that are younger and more successful than me online. It causes me mental and physical pain sometimes. I love my mom. She didn't want this life for me but I'm happy I'm doing something honorable. I didn't start comparing myself to others until I was 29 going on 30 then had a mini mid-life crisis. My greatest self-achievement was getting my CDL license since it was so difficult, and it was the first time I went out of my comfort zone. It was also before my mom got sick and could still work so I had some social and financial wiggle room.
I really liked what you said at the end about being relatable and connecting through failures 👍🏻😅. That’s gold! And please do a segment with your sister regarding this “I” statement. We need to know more about this .
this is exactly why at some point in life (I'm a software dev / student with skills in electronics & learning control theory) I want to get involved in one way or another in helping on bionics technology. Each time I see a someone disabled I think of how damn hard my struggle and depression was as a non-disabled person and try to imagine if I was disabled in top of that and my mind just collapses. If you are disabled and still going through life, mad respect to you dude.
I don't want "success" in the traditional form... I just want something that pays me enough money to live the life I want without having to sell my time to a business to achieve it. I'm almost there. So close.
This is the first time i have watched one of your videos😊 This makes so much sense. Im still processing it, and im so grateful that you have posted the journalling questions. Thank you 🙏
I don't know why, but I can't stop crying right now.. I've been struggling with the feeling of falling behind because everyone seems to have everything sorted out while I feel like I just started my life at 25.. Regret and self loathing have been constant factors in my life for the past couple of years and you helped me understand that there's no specific timeline when it comes to living our lives. Thank you so much for the laughs and for giving me so much hope.
Have been feeling the same way when I turned 29. I just turned 30 last summer and I’m still feeling that way …. ☹️ the struggle is real out here, man!!! but sending you and whoever is out there going through the same thing all the best and that things will work out !! You just gotta push through, give yourself love and patience and things will start to fall into place ❤️✨ Sending you all a huge HUGE HUG ❤️❤️❤️
Yo, I'm 60. Stop comparing& despairing. You aren't too late to make the changes you want to unless you completely give up. You got this - by breathing and being grateful for that breath, by being kind in small ways, it's a lot. The rest is icing. You got this.
Thanks so much for this, when I was younger, I was seen as someone with a lot of potential and talent, now on the other side of thirty feeling behind. This video has just re-framed my perception of what success is or should be. Thank you!
that news segment highlighting all the vastly successful teenagers is like the equivalent of being kicked in the shin multiple times while a crowd is watching and cheering. that hit hard
Watching this at 27 as I'm packing up my studio apartment to move back in with my parents :( Edit: thank u all for the kind messages. I feel less like a failure knowing this is very common 💛
I'm 35 and typing this from my teenage bedroom at my parents' house. It sucks, but it's also an opportunity to get yourself back on track. Hang on in there.
I'm 29 and living at my parents house and I'm broke. It's sucks but I finally feel like I've found myself and I'm moving in the right direction. Never give up!
I cannot truly express just how much I LOVE hearing your thoughts. You are a very intelligent person. Your ideas continue to challenge my way of thinking, which I not only enjoy but also greatly appreciate as it aids my growth as a person. Your videos really get me thinking, coming to conclusions that I wouldn't have ever begun to approach without hearing your thoughts. Thank you for everything you do. You're awesome. 🖤
I am guilty of always comparing my success to others and social media just makes it worse. I am 24 and most people are starting their careers, can drive, are getting married, and graduated. I am graduating from college in the spring, still can’t drive, no where near marriage, and I am currently applying to med and veterinary schools. I have to remind myself that my path was “longer” because I had to over come mental health obstacles, deal with my mom having cancer, and I choose a tough major to peruse. When I analyze all these factors it helps put some perspective to things. I am still embarrassed that I can’t drive though
Yep! I love how you went from creating art to using your art to create your relatable stories. I think the first video I saw of yours was the impostor syndrome video & it resonated so much. You are just a hella good story teller, motivator & artist & it’s something we all didn’t know we needed.
