Netflix’s Monster Dating Show Is Scaring Me (Sexy Beasts) 

I’m sorry but the girl saying “do you have health insurance?” And then just the silent cut of a bull man staring deadpan at her is the funniest fucking thing ever

Rhino dude is the type of guy who’d get caught cheating and justify it by wiggling his hips and saying something like “you can’t tame the tiger inside me babe I’m wild, you gotta let me prowl babe.”

Im 100% convinced mick only won the show because nina REALLY wanted to see what kinda weirdo was under the mask💀She def reported him for sexual harrassment after this

rhino guy has definitely done psychedelics and said he got in touch with the universe and has been "forever changed" but really he just felt empathy for the first time

as someone who is a makeup/sfx art enthusiast, the prosthetics were done very well. they have a lot of detail put into them and they move well. the question here is whether they should have been done at all because the answer is NO

Rhino dude is a dozen LA stereotypes wrapped up in one annoying dude. They couldn't even resist making him a holistic health practitioner. Ca-flimflam indeed.

Can we talk about the scarecrow in this show though? He wasn't talked about a whole lot but he is the sweetest guy. After he gets eliminated they try to show him a picture of dolphin girl and he pushes it away saying he was only here for the emotional connection. What a guy!

This show is the epitome of "Looks don't matter when you're attractive"

The Mantis at least tried to humor her by sliding down the bowling lane. The Rhino just feels like a sexual predator 😅

i feel like the whole “dressing them up to get rid of bias” would be much more successful if they all get put in the same costume/mask so they’re intentionally as close to identical as possible 🤔

As an actual medical doctor “holistic health practitioner” makes me cringe so hard. Anyone can call themselves that🚩🚩🚩 and poor patients get taken advantage of thinking they’re seeing someone who was actually educated on the human body but turns out they’ve had none and are trying to force you to buy expensive supplements, which at best do nothing, at worst put you in the hospital

The amount of times I screamed “NO! STOP! BAD!” at the screen when Rhino Man appeared is at least in the triple digits

Mick makes me so deeply uncomfortable over like three layers of virtual separation. I cannot fucking imagine how uncomfortable it would be to have to experience him in real life.

As a human woman, i find rhino man repulsive and I would cross the street if I saw him. As a sociologist tho I find him fascinating

it's like if Zootopia was surreal and nightmare-inducing and also a dating show for adults lol

So not only was Dominic way chiller, really seemed intent on impressing Nina and making sure she had a good time, when I watched for myself, he was adorable. Girl run.

The masks are not all equal, they should have a theme per episode so it's more even! Ex: cats, devils, carnivore animals, etc

The fact that Mick is a real human who talks and acts this way is so surreal. He's made me feel a whole new level of discomfort, I can't believe Nina chose him 💀

I want to see a dating show where eldritch horrors are paired and it would be called Lovecraft. Everyone gets the villain edit. If you’re going to have a creepy people on your show, they should all be horrible annoying or creepy, so I don’t feel bad about an innocent person getting caught up in all of it.

The mantis dude seemed like a fun, caring, loveable guy who tried to humour her. Mick seemed like a predator, and no, not an animal.

rhino man is the guy who was awkward and nerdy in high school then reinvented himself as cool in college, but he only used, like, teen romance movies from the 90s as reference. yeah reality tv is fake, but i feel like i'm actually watching a very insecure person uncomfortably pretend to be someone they're not and i'm in pain

It's a true disgrace you didn't do this as a beast. I'd love to judge a RU-vid show blind for once.

2:51 Now hes dolphin man, half dolphin half man. Hear him screech at night, cause he just wants a friend.

That guy watched austin powers one time and made it his whole personality

The fact that everyone under the prosthetic is conventionnally attractive/hot kind of defeats the purpose of the show for me. -Beauty is only skin deep, thats why we want you to be focused on their personalities instead of their faces -Takes off mask -oh youre conveniently hot, thank god.

The way Jarvis gets so irrationally upset at rino man's constant dancing just brings joy to my life

You have to admit, the people who designed the masks are pretty good at it.

Rhino guy is like that soggy piece of food leftover in the sink when you're doing the dishes- you don't want to touch it or look at it, you just want to throw it out and move on

I feel like Jarvis needs a series called, "Jarvis Watches Garbage" and he can highlight all the Maury/Springer/Bachelor/Love is Blind content he wants.

I’m going to be completely honest the rhino man seems like the kind of guy that would mansplain Eastern Asian culture to an East Asian and I am not down for that concept 💀

100% I thought it was the rhino makeup that made Mick so unbearable for me. But nope, after the face reveal, I hated him even more. it was like the makeup made him more cartoonish, which made his personality digestible Kaflimflam (pls don't hurt me)

When I saw the thumbnail I thought it was like, a fake reality tv type thing where the contestants were like, literally pretending to be monsters trying to find love, and I’m so disappointed that wasn’t what it was

As someone who's specialising in Chinese philosophy in university, I have no words to describe how insufferable that Rhino guy is to me. Why did I have to be subjected to this, Jarvis. The fact that that girl has the same name as me is just salt in the wounds.

The rhino man's heart exploded when he realised she isnt' ugly... This is why I hate shows that are like that. Because when you take away the looks aspect (and the contestants know that the looks will be revealed later) it makes people even more fixated on looks. "What if they are ugly? Will I still want to date them? What if they are not my type physically?" It destroys the whole idea, IMO. Especially when you have the most conventionally beautiful people on the show. Like, what's the point?

The Rhino Guy is the kind of person who wishes he could date himself

when rhino man speaks my fight or flight response is immediately activated

Mantis dude seemed genuinely really nice and like a really cool casual guy…then rhino man was like a cult leader who mansplains basic tasks to everyone he’s around

I'm very excited for later this year when Jarvis covers "dating, except it's only based on smell" when Netflix premiers Love Nose No Bounds

“That’s not a… sigh…. MICK” The way you said that gave me life lol

My friends and I watched this show exclusively to make fun of it, and the First Thing we noticed was how unfair yhe costumes and dates were!!! Idk what the producers we thinking

I think the mantis guy should've won because he seemed like he had so much more personality, he even dove onto the bowling lane, Kaflynflan

I am almost positive that Mick's speaking pattern is what he thinks women would find hot or full of "mystique" since he can't rely on his body or face to do that. He is literally speaking "gibberish but make it sexy". I'm not saying what he says is sexy, i'm saying he's trying to make it so.

They should have done Dating from the Monster Manual and have someone looking like a beholder, a mind flayer, an aboleth, a mimic, a carrion crawler, a rust monster, a bulette, and a red dragon.

The only reason Nina chose Rhino Man over The Mantis is because if she had chosen The Mantis, she would have been contractually obligated to eat him to ensure her own survival and the survival of their possible future offspring.

Rhino guy is that white dude who tells you he had an "experience out of this world that no words can describe" in a third world country and now appropriates some specific words from that country and can't stop using them. Despite him not knowing shit about that country/countries.

What annoys me about the whole “people are so superficial today” thing in these dating shows is that I fail to recall a time when weddings weren’t about money, family lineage, and general status cues. When weren’t dates superficial?

it'll all come crumbling down when they accidentally get a monster fricker on the show

jarvis laughing at his own jokes immediately after he makes them brings me so much joy

Rhino guy simultaneously has Neckbeard energy and Chad energy and it's truly insufferable

8:56 i understand all of those words individually. cant say i know what the fuck i just heard though

I have fallen down a rabbit hole of all of jarvis's dating show videos and I am having a great time

“Ah you dont know what they look like so it’s completely blind dating!” Yeah except for they only chose conventionally attractive people, so it’s not a point of conflict at all ever.

Jarvis: "Which of these is more romantic?" Me: "Bowling, obviously." Jarvis: "Bowling, obviously." Me: "Kaflimflam."

Mick seems like the type of guy who pressures his girlfriend into an open relationship when she’s not really into it, then gets mad when she goes on a date. Then starts a new age high control group.

This feels like a Jubilee video called "5 Humans in Costume vs 1 Actual Beast" and Mick is the beast

"It's like he's trying to play a Matthew McConaughey character." Not only that, it's like he's trying to be _"sly"_ and combine the worst traits of McConaughey, Ace Ventura and Austin Powers into one persona.

"the useless mansion that has no use" the poison. the poison for kuzco, the poison chosen especially to kill kuzco, kuzco's poison.

Jarvis’ giggle after he says “E L I M I N A T E D” is so cute 😂

The best thing to come out of this show is the quote "ass first, personality second"

I love how Rhino pretty much admitted how shallow he was when he said he was happy about the girls looks, basically insinuating that in his head he was like "please be hot, please be hot".

jokes aside the sfx makeup artists did amazingly on these... that bug guy had crazy detailing. imagine putting this show on your portfolio though

Beast - an animal, especially a large or dangerous four-footed one. other words no a witch and troll or Ogers are not beasts while rynos and pandas are.

That rhino guy encapsulates everything I fear about people in costume/masks. That weird uncanny persona and the exaggerated gestures and slightly unnatural voice. I would have passed out if I saw him when I was a kid

So proud that the power Ranger villains can finally find love.

I really hope the contestants get to keep the Victorian oil paintings of their beast selves, that would be the only reason I would even consider doing such a ridiculous show

when i was a kid my mom told me that you weren't allowed to walk on the bowling lanes because they put special oil on the lanes for the bowling balls to go down. so if any person walked on the lanes they'd slip and fall. like she led me to believe bowling lanes were that frictionless field the kids all went to on the physics episode of magic school bus

Ooh, looking at that castle, they should do a medieval setting one. It would be sort of cool to see people be warrior/non warrior princesses, princes, knights, jesters, nobles, etc. I don't really know what else they would do besides date, but that could be a fun place to start😂

“I’m that white rhino. I’m a rare find.” Little does he know that white rhinos are the only species of the 5 rhino species that aren’t endangered!

Rhino man always seems like he’s about to sell a pyramid scheme. He has that energy.

The weird thing about these shows is that there are millions of people with severe vision impairments, who find love. Like you could just make a dating show about blind people. It could be interesting to hear what people who can’t see at all think is attractive in a partner, and the dating show could otherwise progress like any dating other dating show. But that would be less cinematic than whatever the hell this is.

"anyway, sextina aquafina is looking for love-" the hyperfixations have collided

“There’s our culture appropriative king” LOL so accurate

How you managed to finish all 6 episodes is beyond me

I got an as right after elephant girl says you know what I always wanted to do. "Customize and save on your auto insurance"

Rhino guy is a mixture of the "acid will open a door that you can never close" kind of guy and a "shaka bro" kinda guy.

my favorite thing is about rhino is that people who have matched with him on dating apps have said he’s literally just like that. it’s not a character. that’s just him.

Mick is the kind of person that's weird and energetic and seems to be having fun with life- so when you first meet them, you're kind of overwhelmed trying to peg down their vibe so you just kind of follow along on their runaway train of a personality. Then you snap back to reality after a few hours in their presence, thinking, "wait, this person isn't interesting or fun or even that nice, what's happening." He has hippie cult leader vibes.

“Dating… but you can’t have sex” Ace people: hold my beer

I hate that even though shows like this and Love Is Blind are supposed to prove you can love someone for personality over looks they (casting directors/producers) STILL choose attractive people. This proves nothing! Like, yeah, obviously you'll still be attracted to someone when they have model-esque looks.

I feel like Rhino guy definitely had nasty dreadlocks in college, and when he moved to LA he became more of a spiritual cowboy surfer dude

“Playing a Matthew McConahey character” is exactly what he is. I have no doubt that as soon as he doesn’t get his way, he looses that “cool and calm” vibe he tries so hard to cultivate. Kuhflimflam.

I watched this entire show with my mom. I’m surprised she didn’t have a horrible reaction, because I was terrified

I can never get over the fact that they gave the dolphin gills.

These dating shows that act like they're somewhat progressive in that it's "not about the looks" sure love casting only thin, conventionally attractive people to be contestants.

Rhino: "how does it feel to have nothing but your heart speaking for you right now?" *Immediately proceeds to answer the question on her behalf-literally speaking for her*

People are always asking if they could but never thinking if they should and something like this is always the result

can you fall in love with someone with just their personality? pansexual me: *yes,thats my specialty*

the most disturbing part about the rhino guy wasn't even his appearance it was his personality

Rhino's reveal immediately made me think "He looks like a cult leader."

The Bojack Horseman reference is beautiful.

It makes me laugh to imagine that some of these couples grow older together, get married have two kids and then just after they have a third kid, they get into a massive fight. One of them packets up and walks out screaming, "I PREFERED YOU AS A FUCKING DOLPHIN!" swiftly followed by the reply of: "YEAH? YOU LOOKED BETTER AS A STATUE! I WISH YOU WERE A STATUE BECAUSE THEN YOU WOULDN'T TALK SO MUCH YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Resulting in some traumatized kids and confused neighbours that don't have a Netflix subscription. This is what goes on in my head...

the odd naming could have been easily rectified had they just decided to theme it around halloween costumes and had they named it "love at first fright" i frankly don't understand how they didn't come up with something better, they probably just thought "sexy beasts" was funny and stuck to the name

They should’ve made this into a furry dating show, the contestants would’ve even been able to bring their own costumes. Netflix is cowardly for not taking this cursed and wonderful avenue instead, and you can’t change my mind

i binged the whole thing with my roommates, the plan was to watch one episode while we were waiting for food but it was like a car crash you couldn’t look away from 😟

As a Chinese, I literally felt embarrassed for that rhino guy when he said something sh*t like sex kungfu... SOOOO Cringy

Oh god he screams asian fetish. I’m praying for her

"I'm not attracted to beasts... but" is a terrible way to say you're not a furry.

Fun fact about sliding at the bowling alley : some lanes are oiled, so theoretically you could slide down them! But some lanes aren’t. At my local bowling alley the lanes to the left of the entrance are not oiled while the lanes to the right are (the oiled lanes are used primarily for bowling leagues)

Tbh it's definetly an interesting premise and I'd definetly be entertained just to see the interactions and makeup/costume design

You can absolutely slide down a bowling lane. Bowling alleys coat their lanes with oil, it’s incredibly hard to bowl on a lane without oil. Maybe if you can throw the ball 22+ mph…but most non bowlers throw it about 11-12 mph, even pros throw it around 18-19 mph. The reason the ball goes straight is because there’s oil on that part of the lane…and when the ball starts turning, that’s the “dry” part of the lane ‘cause the amount of oil is less in that area. There are also different brands and viscosities of oil, so if you were to coat the entire lane with a high viscosity oil, you wore compression clothes, are relatively light, and get a running start, you definitely could slide all the way down a bowling lane on your stomach. 😁