Overcoming Self-Hatred 

I brushed this comment off as ridiculous at first but when I reread it again, I was impressed

@@roehanostornsyn3367 Thanks. I think anyone here who has battled with self-loathing, depression & suicidal ideation is too familiar with that absurd & pernicious thought loop.

@@bebeezra I agree, there are many people who understand well the balancing act of trying to stop 1 side of the brain from taking over the other side

The sense of myself that is separate is imaginary. “I” in the deepest sense is all inclusive yet beyond it. We are where all stems from and where it all goes back to. Feel me? 😂😂

Tübermensch At times in my case it's more about existence. A strange unexplainable blessing (which I am grateful for) with a lot of potential for suffering.

I have hope but I don’t think that hope will be worth while

This made me cry.

No, i hate every part of myself, i just wanna see other people's experiences

@@andjelostrbulovic I love u, I love every part of u. Ur amazing and wanted. I’m proud that u pushed this far in life and the perosn I’ve become. Ur amazing and deserve to be happy, ily

@@cayde7293 Please don't spread lies.

Don't be

@@mouhamedbou1283 great words of advice....

I know how you feel but you need to trust yourself and take that "Leap of faith" if not for you for someone else

Same

Same toxic shame or feeling like a loser always worried what other will think of everything i do. I worry a lot.... and my heart is beating fast l don't know why i can't even post anything anymore.

When you feel like that pause and think About something thats right in front of you think about the color shape size etc. Its really helful and you will start to relax

I often feel the same, but I’m getting help and am trying to unpack it.

relatable

Go have someone drive you somewhere where you can grab a single snack, and as they drive him sit in silence and look at the sky through your window. This one helps me a lot

No need to worry about the future consequences. If one mistake can change your life then embrace it. My one mistake made me hate myself so much that I ended up deleting my all social media accounts. I don't know what are the consequences waiting for me in near future but without a doubt that mistake has given my life a second chance, a new phase. So I embrace it & now I have dedicated myself towards something humble.

I've just realized that to😌

This is the best thing I’ve heard in a while

I can add to that. About 6 months ago I was living on a very tight budget with minutes means in order to pay off debt. Now that I have money and more choice, I suddenly don’t have enough to make everything I want happen now. I get very dissatisfied and lose perspective, like somehow I haven’t done enough, been good enough or gotten to where I want to be quick enough. Ironically I am less happy than when I was living on a little and had limited choice. I treasured the little I had.

For many people, yes. Hell, I think it holds true for myself. I just don't think it's true for everyone, some people don't have nearly the same 'urge for more' as others.

Desire is cause of suffering. I dissagree. When you want money because youre afraid of being poor then youre escaping yourself and that is bad. So to turn around 180' we go into reasons we fear poverty. Eg we mostly fear poverty out of fear of losing connection to someone. So once we face that fear. Then desire to have money is a choice to explore that perspective in life which is far from self avoidance and self vetrayal. Desire is a source of suffering is only bad if its to avoid a fear within.

WonderFool i enjoyed reading that, thanks

I feel the exact same way. Thank you for putting it into words.

Thank you for saying thing this. Human BEING NOT Human DOING.

I loved this, thanks.

This hit the nail on the head, thanks for this kind of honesty

I hate that I feel the same

Yeah man ever since I was a kid I hated myself and everything. Just so angry and tired.

You're not alone. As a 10 year old I realized that we were born in this massive world and that each one of us were insignificant small beings. That one could die and nothing will happen, it won't affect anyone. Except family and friends. It's difficult, I know. We feel like we don't deserve anything or it's better if we just fade away from this life so we don't bother anyone. Only advice I know it's to just not hurt yourself. You will hate yourself more if you do that. I feel easier when I know death can happen anytime in my life and just accept that I will be at peace. It's inevitable. So enjoy your time here in this life. Like listening to your favorite songs.

@@alexissegundo4585 Can't say though,i've felt better after ripping off my finger

@@scarsviadeath can't say pain is something to my liking. I mean, we're brought to this world to suffer. So I think that is enough to not harm ourselves. Also, I don't know what you'll do if you run out of fingers

A very, very, good philosophy. Thank you O'ssein.

O'SSÉIN - Master Your Mind With Me while I agree with you about comparing one self to others. Also it can come from child abuse, physical, sexual, and mental abuse. I and many others have survived all of those. Great self hate is spawned by all of these✌️

This can be true for many but that's just it. Even if you don't compare yourself to others you can still look at your own past and see how you have not improved or even kept yourself at the same level; you've worsened yourself. And yes, unhealthy comparison to other people is a cause of self hatred but it ain't the only one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Dude you are everywhere! And so am I:)

The goal of everyday is to be better than your yesterself. Duh

exactly!

💯

Koopa Troopa Poopa same

You do not. Never forget that Edit : you do not deserve to be this angry is what I mean

Koopa Troopa Poopa koro sensei 🙏🏻

Me in a comment. I'm trying to care about myself more despite feeling unsuccessful I just don't know how to "engage with life" as he said.

Yes, I alway been too hard on myself. I do compare myself to others ... I do want to change. It's just I don't know were should I start.

I feel the same. I think I don't deserve to be happy because I find myself a bad person. It is so hard, I really don't know how to get out of this.

@@marly1915 After all this time now I'm better and I stopped hating myself finally, all I can say to you is not to be so harsh on yourself, if you think that you are a bad person then do good actions. What made me get out of depression and stop hating myself was to start exercising, apart from making my body healthier and look better, my mental health got way better and now I have a lot of confidence, I hope it works out for you :)

@@RockyTheDog Thank you so much for sharing this, I will definitely try it!

Same. Feel like I'm lying to myself and denying what is true.

Yeah, I found myself in the same cycle.. I used to be stupidly happy and positive and carefree, but some shit happened & now “allowing myself to receive love and positivity into my life” = the deepest & longest lasting pain I’ve ever felt, I think my spirit broke.. It feels like a I don’t deserve to be happy? It doesn’t seem important.. actually the most horrifying part is that I’m thankful, don’t outright HATE myself, and I can get into happy moods and thoughts regularly…. I don’t wish for death, but I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal or negative.. I don’t see why I SHOULD be happy etc, being stuck in Limbo almost seems worse than Hell because at least in Hell you’re part of something/something’s happening to you.. people can even learn to enjoy pain and suffering or find comfort in it. It feels like I’m frozen in the timeline while life/universe continues on endlessly, good&bad, I’m stuck while life grows smaller as it gets further away. I know how to get healthier and I know that I can, but I just don’t see any difference of why I would do that vs. just no nothing.. I also don’t trust myself to do anything…. It’s like nothing happening at all feels safer than taking a step forward.. wow, I just therapied myself and now realize that I don’t hate myself…. It’s that I don’t trust myself, I blame myself for the shit that went wrong…. so I know it’s up to me to fix it, but there’s just nothing that I want…. And I see that everyone else will be fine even if I’m gone because at this point everyone has moved on even my family.. and I’m not able to WANT something for myself enough…. What do I want.. what do I want…. (Someone or something to connect with.. that is 100% honest and open.. I need that, it’s 100% or nothing because of the trauma that causes me to not trust myself…)

Ian Great advice.

No

Out of all the comments, this one really stuck a chord - thank you.

Placing so much emphasis on our shackles. And yet, they never never locked with to begin. That's one way I think of it. On some days, it works, and I'm free. But on other, they don't fall loose, either way.

I feel like I am struggling with something similar. Each day I hate myself slightly more because I impulsively fuck up all my progress. I don't feel like I am going forward.

^^^

Kyle H fr

Kyle h you ain’t alone brother. Keep striving and take it one step a time, even if it’s a step back to take the next step forward

Read nonduality and the illusion of self

I struggle with that too. Guilt and the feeling of emptiness is a constant.

@Esther Jones as they say, misery loves company. In all seriousness, I’m sorry you feel like crap too. You wanna talk about it?

Me too. I don't even understand how I could have behaved in ways that I did. I realize the behavior was horrible but yet, it seems to be who I am. Sleeping used to help but lately there have been more nightmares.

Exactly how it is for me. Exactly.

every one of you have an unbelievably unique perspectives and strengths. I love that you feel comfortable sharing it here. Nothing in life is 100%, it's ok to let go of the past and focus on small strengths. For me it was realizing that a part of me will always feel alone and disappointed by the world/others. Its always possible to do better, all of the research on neuroplasticity indicates it, but it isn't always 'possible' depending on habits, dopamine addiction, etc.

Thank you toothless :). I'm very happy I can do this.

Very true.

Yes his voice is perfect, he should turn his book into an audio book with his voice narration

Yes the first thing to find change is to realize and not rationalize

I using other people. So its contrate fact to hate mysef

Yes. I feel this 👌💙

You are not alone and I am 34 years old. I have so much to be grateful for, yet can't find that gratitude bone. I feel like it's impossible to be loved. I don't know how this helps you by telling you, cuz it doesn't. But I can relate hard.

23 is SO YOUNG. You have your whole life ahead of you. Take some of that time you spend beating yourself up and use it to make some plans for yourself, something you really want to do, something you’ll look forward to. Maybe there’s a class you want to take, a language you wanna learn, or somewhere you want to travel, even if it’s just to another part of the state. The rest of your life can be wonderful. Don’t waste your 20s worrying about things that you can’t change and that really aren’t merited because, as you said, you are a good person. I’m sending you lots of love and hugs and I hope you spend time with people you love, people who build you up and make you feel good, and if they don’t then find some who will and if they won’t then you do it because you deserve it.

Same here but with the suicidal part

So relatable. I just turned 23 too and assumed this self hatred would go but it's so much worse now and I know I can't continue like this. But no one knows what the 'fix' is. My family are concerned but don't know how bad it really is. I have no friends, which is probably a result of me just being so constantly depressed. I wish I could be normal and accept my face, my lack of qualities and my dull personality. I have dermatilomania (skin picking disorder) which makes me hate myself even more and spiral into this ferris wheel of shame and regret. I find it hard to face people any more because I just struggle to keep it together when I see how normal they are and how far from ok I am.

Too relatable.

Mhm

I love you Gimme ur number

Never be dissapointed you say? Phew! Thanks man, because I wanted to be dissapointed. Guess if a catchy phrase says not to do something you shouldn't. I got another good catchphrase. "Be healthy and awesome at everything". Wrap your head around that you piece of shit

@@noneofyoureffingbizness5806 I'm curious as to how I've offended you? If you don't like my advice you're entitled to ignore it.

@@sirmango5439 you can't say shit like "don't be dissapointed". It's as idiotic as saying to someone who is depressed "just don't be depressed", as if it's easy to just "snap out of it". Also, would you say that quote to a disabled or crippled person ? Guess not. And if you did it's just because you are totally oblivious as to how these people feel about life in general, therefore being a fucking douchebag. Point is don't just go spewing around quotes, use your own god damn words

@@noneofyoureffingbizness5806 let me start by saying: calm down. There's nothing wrong with disagreeing with someone, that doesn't mean we can't be civil about it. The idea behind what I said is to try and focus on the things we each have going for us, even if it's only minor things, as opposed to the terrible things going against us because we then start to compare ourselves to people that lack our burdens and feel more depressed and/or more dissapointed. Everyone faces their own difficulties in life, just because they are different does not make them any less difficult to the individual. By focusing instead on the good things we have whatever their significance or insignificance, it rather makes one realise that life isn't so bad after all. That's not to say it's easy to do that; I've spent most of my life depressed and dissapointed and by extension hating myself (hence commenting on this), I know it's hard, though it tends to be the most difficult things in life that are most worth doing. When you've hit rock bottom and got nothing left to lose then what's the harm in trying anyway? What I'm trying to get at is we get to determine and perceive what life is for us, I think we should therefore aim to perceive our own lives in a positive way where possible, not to disregard our disappointments but to refrain from drowning in them by holding onto the things we're grateful for.

Noneofyour EffingBizness we can see your pain from a mile away. All the best man..

Call me +420735507018 if you want to live. I am 43 and can relate. Several times I had suicide ideation, and, no matter how painful, live is worth living.

TheDestinyDragoon I understand hating everyone and everything in this world. And I understand being young and feeling helpless, even though everything looks fine. But I always thought I would get better. I’ve tried, pretty hard actually. I’ve been able to push it back, and keep myself in check at times, but it never last. The stupidest little things will set me off, and off I go. Destroying all trust that I’ve gained from others and myself. Now, I’m alone again and don’t even want to put others or myself through the hell of my sick mind. I hope you will look for some help, I didn’t even start to try until I was in my 40s. But your young, and there is things that help folks. I wish you peace ,

Gerhard Symons I appreciate it, I really do. ✌️

Cool Breeze Hope things have got better for you bro .

take some mushrooms bro sheesh

Nah but then I'd just hate myself for hating myself

Stonks

Just uno reversed that bitch 😂

I used the self hatred to destroy the self hatred

Omg.. Genius😂😂

But be glad that it happened for if it did not the you today may not have been you

I have the exact same situation except my parents care about my grades and mine are decent, but I know I can do better

Too bad you have an anime profile pic.... sorta totally invalidates your opinion.

@@Coreisus How does a photo invalidate his opinion?

Stay strong you guys. You can do it. I believe in you. Hope you're doing good nowadays

I think two things: one is biological - I mean in the sense that in the wild (so back before civilization) being too different could put the whole group in danger. AFAIK you can see it in animals when they cast out the different one. Not that that makes it acceptable IMO - we're not living in the wild anymore. The second thing - no, you didn't deserve it!!! IMO it's our sick society that doesn't make effort to include everyone. Also parents teaching their kids to do so. AFAIK, a bully kid is a kid that doesn't feel content/happy/loved and therefore has the urge to hurt others to make themselves feel better. A bully, in most cases, comes from a family that isn't able to provide everything a kid needs. Love, respect, boundaries etc. If a person is stable, loved and well raised, they don't feel the need to bully people around them. I wasn't bullied as badly as you but did have unsupportive parents (except for financial support) and I don't have advice on how to accept yourself, I struggle with that too... And I can totally relate to the last sentence you wrote.

Quill & Ink That is so sad and pathetic.

@@nihilismus9840I agree full of BULLSHIT

Sometimes resistance makes you hate your life but not yourself when you realize resistance is all apart of the game

Yea too bad there's nothing to engage with. My life is forfeit. No purpose. Only here to be a scapegoat.

Hey buddy, are you at least a little better

Are you better now

I know that Feeling man

Felt

I attempted suicide twice, i'm glad i did not. Brother, if you want to escape this world, meditate and you will find yourself, in a world you deserve and it will shield you from the evil world we live in.

workout , do some weight lifting , start light and progress. it ll save you.

Sigma zix Our spiritual state is above all. No physical or mental state could ever save an individual without the spirit’s guidance and perseverance.

@@dantewar2406 fixing your diet aka eating healthy , getting enough sun every day aka vitamin D and weight lifting is what helped me so thats what I recommend. I believe meditation helps a great deal also , its just that im not into it , yet.

Sigma zix Well, i hope you do get into it and become much better and develop into a stronger person, physically, mentally and spiritually.

I'm happy for you man, have a nice day :))

I want to learn Carpentry!! How is it??

how are you doing?

I feel the same.

Same

I think that was Jordan Peterson

Yeah, that was Peterson..

What if you're worse than you were yesterday?

But the problem is when you judge yourself too much on your past self, which is something that we can't change. So as long as I judge myself on who I was yesterday, I'll never felt good enough

Same here..i am praying to god to let me die in my sleep everyday 😔..I don't know whether I feel bad that there are so many people like me or feel good that I am not alone in this journey. I hope we will be strong and fight through it.

I too been dealing with the same thing as you my whole life. I am 68 now and learned to control these things, but it has been very difficult journey being called retarded all through my youth and very few people understand our form of autism. My heart goes out to you for what you are going through, but glad you are viewing this channel for it is a good help to us.

Same. I am due for re-diagnosis at 28

@Jimmy Crickets Couldn't agree more 100% !

Jimmy Crickets ???

Same, its so overwhelming. Im 16 and got diagnosed a month ago with ASD. I also have anxiety so im in a continuous self hating cycle😩 wish you the best💕

It's ok. Sometimes, it's ok to just be. You don't have to love or hate yourself. Just let yourself breathe.

I hate myself too I don't know why

Only one person in the world can define success in your life. Guess who it is?

Oh, I know it's me ;) I even think that my "success" is more important than what is generally considered a success.

I always thought that I have to play with the cards in my hand and although they are shitty, I need to make the best of it. Now, I realized that only way to win, is to leave the table and not play at all. Like a beggar who sits on the chest of gold. What exactly I want to win? I'm already a millionaire! Sure, I still try to get better, but the difference is that I do this, because I want to, not because I need to. I feel free, because I not only don't need to compete with others, but also with my past self. I already won, so now I can just relax and do what I want without any pressure to succeed. You are where you need to be, my friend ;) Only thing that prevents you from seeing it, is the idea that you need to be anywhere other than where you are right now.

Glad it was helpful! Thank you for the compliment :)

Same!! 🥳😁

You don't need talent to be a good person. which, once you think about it, is a talent in of itself.

@Hyperskreem 82 I am 35 years old and I hate my own existence just as much as my haters and critics do and plus I don't have a love life and probably never will.

I slapped myself a few times today as i hated the way i chose to sell stocks that weren't losing much so hastily.

Cant argue.. Thats fucked up. God is a bastard

​@@rscott2247 why didn't you get crypto?

🤧😭 are you doing fine now

​@@user-br7ke7ck2iI hope that the person is okay.

Thank you

kinda same, much better than being in contact with a lot of people tell you what. listening to their useless viewpoints and opinions just makes me tired

Go out into nature and let it speak to you. Meditate.

I don't hang out with family and friends. They are empty vessels. Consider a good thing

be grateful that you have the opportunity to start meeting new people and build a social life. it doesn't matter how long it takes, just try taking small steps everyday to become the person you want to be.

roll zolo interesting indeed. Im there🦋

Unfortunately I am in the same boat with you. I am now 60 years old and suffering this horrible chronic physical pain and mental pain. I have tried Nick Ortner Tapping for better now. You can try