Hi coach lee❤️ i went through hell when i got my heart broke after 5 years of relationship and almost committed suicide, i did no contact while crying everyday and that went for 2 months, my ex boyfriend started a relationship a week after we broke up so i was devastated, long story short, 2 months later i met someone who loved me like no one ever loved me before and i realized my ex was abusive. as soon as we became boyfriend and girlfriend my ex reached out and begged crying for forgiveness and ask to get back together, sadly for him i wasn’t interested anymore. thank you coach lee
I feel like there is no down side to NC and focusing on yourself. If your ex reaches out and wants you back, great! If they don't, one day you'll realise you don't even want them back. This is about taking your power back. I sincerely wish all of you find love whether it's with your ex or someone new.
I’m done feeding her ego; she thinks she’s that much better than me just because I treated her right and supported her throughout the bad and good.. I know people fall out of love but having unconditional love for someone is different than always being infatuated. It’s not caring about your own ego when your with them.. it’s accepting them for everything and still being there no matter what.. this is just a cruel mind game from other influences.. that only known one side of the relationship… that’s how their ego inflates… and they start to have assumptions that they’re better than you..
If they can leave once, they will always do that again. Just work on yourself and move on. Life is too short to be hurting yourself in the process of no contact. I bet you, you will see life differently once you open your mind into something new rather than waiting for someone who intentionally hurt you. It's really painful because I have been there and I can tell you there are many wonderful people out there. Open your mind into loving other people and the thought of your ex will gradually fade away with time.
+Dilz You realize that no contact is also for what you've just described, right? If all you're doing during no contact is moaping around and stewing on negativity, you're doing it wrong. You're precisely supposed to get out there and work on yourself and your connections to other people. Getting the ex back should almost be viewed as a fortunate possible side effect, but the fact is you'll only become more attractive to the ex and to other people by working on yourself first and foremost. Coach Lee's mentioned that a bunch of times...
If they say "have you lost weight? You look great!" they regret the breakup. When you focus on your health, your ex and lots of people you want to know will notice =)
Coach Lee gives us great tips and advice for going through a break up. But remember guys ultimately one who endured the pain and fought to get the Ex back was YOU. So thank yourself and thank coach lee for the tips.
A month after my break up a mutual friend said my ex was drinking unhealthy at her party. While she’s trying to move on after the break up while getting on dating app a week later , I know I had an affect on her and one day she’ll realize (if she didn’t already) . Crazy my life got better after the break up, I am less focus on pleasing someone else and soon to be a law student . Life is a blessing in disguise , I love everything you preaching as I am on a heal state and journey
Every ex has eventually tried to come back. Only after they ruined the relationship. Name calling and ghosting me does not warrant getting back together… EVER! I’m worth more than that! Bye bye. I love you Coach Lee!
3/6 signs, lets go! its really looking good out here. Damn and i was crying my eyes out only a couple hours ago. Your videos are a god send. keep it up!
This video came right on time since my ex reached out to me after 9 months of no contact and a few days ago he asked if maybe there is a chance we could see each other and hang out. When I thought everything was said and done, when I was certain that I would never see him again, he reached out against all odds and asked me out... Not sure what will happen with him because I'm not giving anything for granted, but I'm sure now that your method works, your advice works. I'm glad I found you right on time when I was feeling sad. I'm doing good now due to your words. Thank you, Coach Lee 💖
I did nothing wrong in the relationship, she chose to leave either way. She does none of the signs showing any interest and avoids me completely. She’s feeling a lot of guilt, I know that for sure, but I also know she will never confront our situation or talk about it, she would rather just quit and wallow in self pity. Tons of fun for me.
Exact same thing for me. Guessing she was a dismissive avoidant who clearly didn't know how to have a healthy relationship and thinks something is wrong because she's uncomfortable handling things properly? XD
Lol i get a bit sad watching these vids and always seeing no positive signs whatsoever. Finally on Valentine's Day this year (and nearly 10 months after break up), and three days later (two days ago) she gave the first signs of something?... She saw my stories, tadá!! Ridiculous and pathetic.
i feel you and this happened to me as well... it's almost incredibly shocking not to hear from her after so long... bc we did have a great relationship. I have lost respect for her to not even think of checking in on me after telling me " shes so worried about me and wants me to get better and work on myself" she doesnt give a flying F*** if i havent heard from her in 7 months... f that man. silence speaks volumes and i hope my silence knocks some sense into her because she probly thinks she can hit me up whenever and ill come crawling back but its the opposite now. I have grown and don't want anyone in my life who doesn't check on me. i've also applied this to some friends that i thought were my friends... all in all the breakup is a huge eye opening experience for me. it's an awakening that i desperately needed. so maybe it is not time for me to hear from her yet. maybe one day she will reach out. but i made a promise to myself that that's it for me trying. good luck man
woow the same situation here. She rather expect me to reach out for peace than her. I know she wants me back but she want me to make the first move. She's literally stalking me on social media
After a month of NC I broke it only to wish him a happy b-day (yea I know my bad). I actually realized that our relationship wasn't fun. He didn't treat me good and made me feel very insecure never really complimenting me, pointing out my flaws and saing "I don't understand things" I wish him the best, I do cause I know hes a troubled soul (takes 1 to know 1) but we were not a good match...at all!! NC does help out! You'll start to see what truly is instead of over romantizmin the things or blaming yourself! You're gonna be fine, even better! Trusttt me! You got thiss Kings and Queens 💕
My ex started talking to other guys before we broke up. I co fromted her about which led to a nasty break up. 6 months after I broke NC and apologized for the words I said and asked if we could fix things. She blocked me however, I was trying to fix things to help her. I moved on tho. One day you'll wake up and it wont hurt anymore.
For a couple of months I didn't want to take it in when you talked about working on moving on was a win even if they didn't come back, but it has really helped. It's getting longer and longer between each time I fall down again and it doesn't last as long by far.
@@Liz-dragon-street. I did, but it was a disaster. She went from curious to cold and dismissive again fast. So I cut off contact again, leaving one doorway back labelled clearly in large capital letters, but she's never taken it. I'm glad she hasn't, though. I saw Coach Ken's recently videos on what it's like being in a relationship with someone who has untreated Borderline Personality Disorder and it described my experience perfectly. I just put myself into there dating again and have more confidence and self-respect than ever 🙂
Great video Lee. I enjoy your videos everyday bcse it reminds me of how much I've grown since my breakup. Thank you...My ex jumped into a rebound relationship 2 weeks after a 5 YEAR engagement. I have no idea how he feels or where he is, but I'll bet he misses me, his FIRST LOVE...
right on time coach. 1) she didn’t want to return my clothes she wears and sleeps in. She reaches out when she feels like it, but never reaches out with anything of substance. 2) she doesn’t ask if I’m dating but she asks who I’m hanging around with and what I’m up to now. 3) she interacted with me for a while as if we were friends.. 4) she interacts with my socials and will respond to my stories and is usually one of the first ones to view my stories. She also has reached out 6 different ways in the past week but nothing of any real substance. She’s probably long gone, meanwhile I’m healing and am getting further from her myself. Maintaining NC.
Hello. She did all of these the first 3 weeks of our break up. Then after that shes gone ghost on me. Been 3 months since break up. Havent heard from her in 2 months at all. Did 2 rounds of NC that she didnt reach out on. I went for 25 days the first time and im currently at 33 days now. Nothing from her.
3 weeks of NC. He reached out few times every week just to say hi and just to tell me to take care... Deep in my heart we still both love each other. I'm still waiting for him to initiate that we get back together but there are times I'm becoming impatient lol. But Coach Lee said, let him earn you back. Everytime I feel missing my ex and wanted to text him, I run to Coach Lee and watched his videos just to remind myself to stick with the NC rule. This assignment is so tough Coach Lee.
My ex even 4 days after we broke up he has never unfollowed me on anything and for some reason requested to follow me on Facebook even thought I never use it. He still jokes around with me. I am focusing on myself right now and we work together. Every time I get there he gets more silent and doesn’t talk much. My goal is just me right now and he sees how good I’m doing.
Coach Lee is so right. My ex reached out 4 times in a month after 1,5 months of no contact. First time he said he saw something that reminded him of me, second time he asked me for a favour and indirectly asked me to see him, third time he asked for advice, last time he sent me a video. I am very friendly and a bit flirty with him, I never iniciate our chat, but I am always light and easy going. Yet, I am still not sure what his reaching out really means, if I look from my perspecitve, I would never asked my ex for favours, would find other ways to do things, guess he is different.
My gf broke up with me 2 months ago cause she was having"family" issues and she suggested she wanted to be friends. I said sure but I'm reality i started doing no contact.. She texted me a simple message i reply cause i wanted to show her that I'm doing ok and not being needy. So i kept my cool and casual, but she went cold. A week later i found out she went to the hospital and i know i probably broke no contact but i texted her how she was doing and feel better. Not expecting a reply she texted me right away. Told me how she was doing about her work and even about her new bf. Now i know this is probably a rebound relationship, she was telling me how great and amazing and wonderful and so on so on he is to her, trying to be a good sport about it i just told her that's good for her. Next day she texted me asking how i was doing and keeping the conversation casual. She then brings up how funny i am and complaining about her new bf and this gut feeling she has of him. I started doing no contact again and this time I'm gonna let her come to me if she wants. i been working on myself and feeling a lot better. Coach Lee has really been helping me with his videos.
The 5th sign is what's happening with us now. He won't stop reaching out to me like he refuse to let go. In his mind we're friends but I don't want to just be friends. I also don't want him to know that I want him back either 😄
It's better to just love yourself, be in love with yourself & get married with the person on the mirror (yourself). You are who you have been looking for. You are the one so stop chasing. And if you are to chase, focus on chasing your goals & dreams & not people. Love Lord God, yourself, your friends & family who truly love & cares about you unconditionally. It will save you a lot of time, money & energy. Peace.♥️
honey bunny, in most of Coach Lee's videos, there are many people with the same concerns. They have been "dumped" several times. Coach Lee has a huge library, and I'm sure you will see quite a few about the Dumper and Dumpee who have gone thru this.
The good thing for me about my situation withy ex is that the only way she can know anything about me is to message me directly. She doesn't see me anywhere on social media and has nobody she can ask about me. I'm completely unreachable other than to message me. She's completely in the dark. The same is true for me. I see and hear nothing of her but that's good from my perspective because I'm working on myself and moving on from her in case I never do hear from her again. Will be interesting to see if she ever reaches out and what my reaction will be to it.
My gf just broke up with me after 8 years. She says she can’t be in a relationship with but still wants to be friends bcs we are best friends. I just hope she doesnt go around and has a lot of random sex or what not or get together with someone else bcs i dont think i can handle that. I hope coach lee his theorys come true !
I wouldn't accept friendship. It's not what you want. I'd tell her "no thanks on the friend thing, but get in touch when you're interested in romance". The friendship thing is usually just to help ease them through the break up, or keep you as a back up option. Even if its genuine, it isn't what you really want. Stand up to her and don't accept less than what you really want.
Thanks Coach Lee, your words have helped me along the last 7 weeks of heartache. So, how should I take this? My ex broke up with me 7wks ago and I’ve been trying to do NC, I slipped on Valentine’s Day, when she called me. I went over and I, stupidly, pleaded my case why we should stay together. There was no shouting or fighting of any sort. We embraced and I mentioned to her that “I understand your reason for wanting the break up, but if you changes your mind, you have my number.” Later on in the evening she texted back and says that I’ll always be in her heart and that she still loves me! I never responded back… Fast forward 4 days, I’m still in no contact, she calls me. Says there’s mail at the house I should pick up. She then starts crying over the phone and says “I miss hearing your voice!” She also said, she’s mad at me for not being more empathetic while we were together. Mad is good right? I mean, at least she’s showing some emotion s. When she’s over being upset, she will see the better side of me, correct?! How do I proceed from here?
Stay in no contact. If she truly loves you, she'll come back whether you respond or not. Remember, she's the one who wanted the breakup. Stay strong, and stay away. Sounds like she wants to know that you'll be waiting "if" she decides to change her mind. Also, she sounds like she's playing mind games. She wanted the breakup, let her suffer the consequences. It'll pay off in the end, no matter the outcome.
I totally messed up! Later in the evening after a few drinks, we talked for 1hr and 45mins on the phone and I found out she already slept with the rebound guy! And the phone call went south after… ugh! 4 weeks of work down the tube and I probably lost her for good after I showed how her sleeping with the rebound guy affected me. Ugh! 🤦🏻♂️
I messed up and lost her. I’ve been doing no contact, and made a shocking amount of progress in just two weeks. Last night, late, she sent me a IG meme that was basically talking about dealing with grief while have to cut someone out of your life and how hard it is. I want to respond so badly but coach has mentioned to not unless it’s something with intent. It seems like she’s missing me and NC is working so far, but also seems like she’s trying to reinforce she made the right choice. Leaving on read isn’t something that could push her away after showing vulnerability, albeit half assed vulnerability through a meme?
detectivejimmy, I don't believe that it's over. I suggest you stay in NO Contact and I'm sure she will come around. If she really loves you, it's NOT OVER...
After he broke up with me, got on Tinder saw the reality of online dating, after several month he started sending me 2 page emails with every details in his life to include having a love interest. His first email he was fishing for info if I was dating someone, I ignored that statement and answered others. After 3rd email, I asked to meet in person and I said I am sorry we cannot go back to being friends, all contact must cease. He talked about the memories the entire time and I said, for you our times together were fun and exciting and although that's a reflection of my personality, I was very hurt and it was a painful experience. I am sorry we can no longer have contact unless in the future you are single and I happen to be single too and we'll see what the future holds. He said I was hoping we'll stay friends with hopes of us getting back together in the future. I said I am sorry no. Did I make the right decision?
I have a suspicion so I'm going to test something: Abbie, if you're reading this, send me a message to meet up where we celebrated the Boston Tea Party.
@Alan Rush Oh wow. Thanks, Internet stranger, for your personal insight into my life which you know all about. I shall certainly heed your words and apply them to my life with due diligence. How could I ever repay this kind gesture? But fr, who hurt you 😂
Thank you Coach Lee, my ex still initiates contact with me often and she sent me pictures of old inside jokes we shared, I hope she comes back to me one day but your words have helped me a lot to get through this dark time. You are the best Coach Lee ❤️
You are such a blessing Coach, like the friend of all of us here seeking understanding. I have been seeking for 1 of your videos about when the ex won’t let you do no contact as he keeps reaching out every other day to maintain some sort of casual communication but he is not talking about the relationship. And I just got my answer in this video. Thank you 🙏
Thanks for these videos, Coach Lee. You are so helpful. I'll be honest, it no longer hurts that he ghosted me. I know now he misses me as much as I miss him. I am torn. Part of me wants the mental and emotional intimacy, but I don't think I will ever trust him again. Ever. But I miss him. Should I be a friend with him without the physical? Or would I be setting myself up for another bout of pain? I think I cried the first three months after. I don't want to go through that again.
We spoke recently and he apologized for hurting me right away, and asked if we can keep the hurt in the past. I don’t think he wants to reconnect anymore. I asked and he never responded 🤷♀️😅
It's working coach... NC for almost 2mth...., though we work in the same office and interact every day/moment.. Number 4 and 5 are the current signs very very clear...
💫🏆💥 *03:05** CS ICE SPICE love the example sample statement 😒* They must be scared and anxious otherwise they won’t take u seriously 😰 06:38 Yehh it gives me boost 😼
I did the no contact and my ex has been reaching and now she wants to meet up before she goes into the military… what kind of interaction is this going to be??
Yey! JWU with this notif on my screen. Excited to learn once again. Thank you, Coach, for always sharing your insights with us. Attendance check, everyone? PRESENT! ☺️ from Philippines 🇵🇭 with love. 🤍❤️
Hi Couch Lee! Your long term fan here! I love and respect your work! It helps a lot! I am wondering if you would see this comment. But if you do, could you please consider making a video about - what should a dumper (me) do after she wanted to reconcile after a break up, but got rejected badly by the dumpee (my ex)? I am currently just doing “no contact” here without knowing what else I could do. He is in another relationship and blocked me everywhere. I don’t see a lot of other couches out there touching this topic. But it will be very helpful and I really need this now. So your help would be much appreciated. Thank you so much again!! :)
Angry ex - What if I am in NC and my ex is calling me with excuses to talk to. I answer, I am polite but not begging or talking about break up etc (I was crazy anxious) and he seems interested in knowing about my life and two last calls he hung up angry because I said for example that I want to buy a new phone (he thinks I don't need one). Then he adds lots of girls on instagram. Mind games? Angry because I stopped chasing him? I guess the grass is not greener on his side like he thought...
I recently just went through a break up and I followed your advice of sending a clean slate text and started the no contact. I have two questions: 1. She is posting negative cruel things subtlety on Facebook. What should I do with that? 2. I have a profile pic of us on social media, should I change it out or leave it for a while? We are still connected on all social media platforms. This is so hard because I’ve never tried this strategy. I want to reach out, but I’m trying to be disciplined with it, but how can I sustain it?
Coach! I commented 5 days ago and I’m commenting again. I’ve been in NC for about a month and a half and got almost all my stuff back about 3 weeks ago. Today she called me because she was “thinking about me a lot and wanted to see how i was doing.” We spoke on the phone for over 20 minutes and she asked if she can swing by while i was working on my truck so i said sure, swing by. We talked in person for about 20-30 while flirting and showing each other affection but no kissing. She did not look like she was doing well, appearance-wise. She also said things to make it seem like she wasn’t doing so well anymore. She’s “alone a lot” and “it sucks not having someone that checks up on her all the time.” She also said she can’t eat and doesn’t sleep. What does all of this mean? Can she be approaching the fear stage of the breakup?
Fred, everyone (including myself) went thru ALL the symptoms your ex is going thru. It's NORMAL. If it's over, it's over. Everyone goes thru this unless they are a narcissist.
1. Yes. Yes, yes. Like he is telling me that why i am not giving him an update about whats happening to meeee. 2. Yes. when i post something like he dont know if i am talking to a boy or girl, he will ask… 3. Yes yes yes… thats why i stop telling him whats happening to me. And he is the one always chatting first. (Thanks coach for a tip about NC) 4. He is telling me that sometimes he missed our relationship or being together, but then he will bring up the cause of the breakup 🤣🤣🤣 5. Oh nooo hahahah he is not talking to me regularly 🤣🤣🤣 and when he do chat me, i am the one who let the convo end. I will let the convo fade…. 6. Before he is. But lately, not anymore
Sunset, is this an ex? If not, just ask her out to dinner or drinks. If she IS an ex, it would depend on if she dumped you. I wouldn't do it. I recommend Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit for you. It's excellent! myexbackcoach.com/ebk
Gold_fig, that's fine if you're not blocked. I highly recommend Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit for you. It's awesome and it has strategies for every situation. myexbackcoach.com/ebk
Hes not telling me that directly but seeking information to my bestfriend asking if i miss him and askin if i have new etc... is it the same??? Buy the wah he has rebound now after 1 month of breaking up.. thanks coach leeeeeee!!!❤
When you make more videos on long distance relationship ex back 🤔 wanna listen more about long distance relationship ex back u r relationship videos r too good
50 days no contact now after a 5 year relationship. Shes blowing up social media with photos and passive agressive captions/comments. I still have lots of stuff I need to pick up from our old apartment that she still lives in. How do i go about getting it while in no contact? How is she living alone in apartment we shared with drawers and a closet full of my stuff?
My ex broke up with me on 22nd nov 2022 bcz i hurt him..now i am on the 4th day of no contact... Will he miss me... He has a girl best friend... Bestie... But i believe he won't jump to rebound relationship with her... Will he miss me even when she is with him?
Is your ex being angry at you also a sign? My ex left me for the third time... I know. Each time he came back, anxious and scared that he'd lost me forever. The third time he also showed signs of those feelings but after 3 weeks he turned and was so angry at me 'leave me alone, don't call me again, there is no reason for us to talk to each other, etc etc.' I hadn't been blowing up his phone, I'd given him space. So I'm curious if his anger is actually a sign of regret?
Coach Lee mentions it’s encouraging that exs keep a photo of you on instagram. But what’s the meaning when a week after your photos and tags (not many) were removed from her Instagram? Signs it’s over or a healing process? Anyone experience doing this to their ex?
Ok...I have been in No Contact for over a month now but she really does not use Social Media and I live about a half hour away so she can't really see me snd no mutual friends. This was a short term dating. She broke it off because her mother has dementia and she is a caregiver fir her. I get it is very stressful & time-consuming. When we were dating it went very well...when she broke it off, I just accepted it...no begging, crying etc etc. She text me about a month ago that she will reach out when things slow down. Any chance of that happening?
Not what I should’ve done but I texted her just saying hope she’s doing well etc and she didn’t answer back but she read it at least I know where she stands, for a while I was scared she wanted to reunite but wasn’t going to reach out I’m happy tho I’m back in the dating game and chatting with a new girl
I’m meeting my ex this weekend after 40 days of NC. Should I tell her I want her back if she asks? I’m not going to bring it up. Can you make a video about actually meeting eachother after NC?
I think he has a video about what happens when your ex reaches out after no contact. He says not to ask them right away to get back together. Take it slow and feel them out.
Get the Emergency Breakup Kit. In it, Coach goes over how you should interact and say at the first meet up. And Coach has some YT videos up on what to do as well.
Coach lee if you see this I could really use some advice. Well me and my ex got back together a month ago an everything coach lee saiid works but then my ex which was again my bf just messaged me now saying he doesn’t love me anymore and he’s thought about it and knows he doesn’t want to be with me and never wants to be with me again and doesn’t want to talk to me or see me anymore. So I’ve had a great night.
It's been six months, haven't heard from her in about one month. Is it too late now? Do I just keep waiting? No contact seemed to start working then randomly stopped again. I've been very casual whenever we have talked. I'm just stuck in what to do and not to do. Thought I'd feel better by now but I don't .
We dated for 3 years, lived together for 2 and were engaged before breakup. Lost a kid after which she got depressed and broke up with. So its been 4 months, 2 of no contact. They told me to move on, after which I finally went no contact. 1 month into no contact, they ask me if I miss them, and send pictures of where we used to live together. This last month I havent heard anything from them, but I saw they opened all the messages I sent them when they were ignoring me. Clearly they are going into the right direction, but still no sign of them wanting to get back together. You think I sill have chance at this point?
I'm in no contact and I don't think its working, I've been in contact for about 3 weeks, and she did message me but it was just to get the reminder of her stuff so I gave her stuff and that was it, instead she proceeded to unfollow me and every social media platform
My first love is trying to get back with my after 21 years as the years have gone by he always finds a way to communicate with me. First time it was threw letters and a couple of years later it was messages. I still love him but I'm scared that he will hurt me again
Dezi, these things do happen. I've heard of a couple getting back together after 31 years. How do YOU feel? Do you think he will hurt you again? You mentioned that. It's up to you, and how YOU feel about him. If it was me, and I was still single, I would meet for a drink, or coffee, but NO EXPECTATIONS! GOOD LUCK!
so does,, cheating, leaving then marrying the other woman- & then stalk me for another 3 years-- a sign they regret leaving me? We both worked for the phone company- I changed my number 4 times over those years- he used company equipment- which he could be fired for- to obtain my new number.
