Literally without fail, EVERY covert narc who’s pretended to be modest would reveal their cards with their facial expressions-narcs never seem to be able to control their reactions (i.e., small prefrontal cortex). Always look at people’s faces, and if you’re dealing w/ a covert narc, they’ll smirk like a cartoon villain, if you”naively” believe that they’re sincere about being modest, or really, anything else. If you’ve dealt w/ narcs, you know that they try to throw off the scent of their attraction to someone by putting that person down. You’ll defend that person by saying, “No, they look great,” or whatever it is that would counter the lie/insult they’re saying. As you’re saying this, you’ll see the cartoon villain smirk. I would register this reaction every time, but never understood why it was there, since I didn’t know about narcs as a subspecies of “humans” (we know they’re just demons in human form 😂). Having come from an all-narc family, by the time I was dealing w/ other people, I was familiar w/ certain behavioral patterns-I just didn’t know that there was a convenient label for them, and as we all know here on this channel, all narcs are PREDICTABLE AS F*CK. 🤣
Covert narcisists know what they are doing and behave in a cunning calculated way, they are sociopaths and the most dangerous of all the narcisists because they do terrible damage under cover, silently. Thank you Christina. God bless you❤
Thank you, you're right about everything. It's so true. Both of my parents are Narcissists so is my grandmother and other family members. Narcissists Enablers are just as bad as Narcissists. I have brothers and sisters that are Narcissists Enablers. I am the oldest out of five children my parents had. I always been the black sheep in my family. I am a Empath. Narcissists are Liars, Narcissists always play the victim. Narcissists never loved us. Narcissists don't care about you at all. Narcissists and Narcissists Enablers are pure evil souls.
Spot on! These are the things covert narcisists do. Chameleons and deadly snakes. They are the worst because it takes a lot of time and pain to discover what you are dealing with.
1. self deprecation saying he’s ugly and bad looking but that i always saw him with good eyes but at the same time taking pics and editing them to put them on social media (?) 2.humble but at the same time saying life was unfair to them and feeling resentful to those who had better opportunities and if he was them he would have done so much better than them 3. fake memory but at the same time denying and saying they were gonna ask or do it later
4. after the break up i used to tell him why i loved him and he would tell me “ you shouldn’t have me in such high standards you shouldn’t put me in a pedestal like that”
They have tried to put me down for being proud of myself and tried to shame me for respecting my mother's request for me to finish school and be a better person to others. They have shamed me, for wanting better for myself
The part from 11:24 to the end is SO important to hear!! Thanks Christina! Anyone who hurts you the same way over and over and over again either: A) knows what they're doing and is doing so intentionally, or B) is exceptionally daft. In either case, not someone I recommend having in your life.
You just described my older sister; I worked her out a few years ago (resented me for having the audacity to be born and taking her little crown away from her) but this was an absolute nail-on-head description.
My gf is a victim of the patriarchy, white men, her childhood, her parents, her ex husband, Donald Trump and me when we have a disagreement. It gets so exhausting.
I have so many questions about this. Every one of your points made sense. Why would my ex just dump me over a text and not respond to me when we never had problems? He made me feel it was my fault bc I texted too much when he would ignore me.
". . .because if you still believe that this person is good and modest, that this person doesn't know exactly what they're doing every time they hurt you. . ." (11:20). Wow. I needed to hear that. Thank you so much.
"They are the standard" !! Yes that is everything! Thank you very much! This "modesty" identity I observed growing up from my family never added up. I define it as anxiety manifesting as scrooge, while continually proclaiming "frugality"! One look at their environment as well as the adjacent life demonstrates something very different.
" Am I the narcissist?" definitely hit home. It was so bad, when I made the decision to leave I contacted my ex wife for advice. She's known me wayyyyy longer and I do consider her a good person. So I asked her am I a narcissist? She just laughed and said "definitely not!" I did pick up bad traits from the mental warfare that I'm working on. BE WARNED! You will get baited so you look like the bad person.
Your whole descriptions on this list was my second ex all the way. And he claims he cannot remember acting like this so it’s not possibly mental abuse because by them abuse is only physical and I am too fragile over anything and too immature in the relationship with him when I known I really shouldn’t do all those permanent things he wanted very early on too soon. Me not jumping on board to being married and have his kids at all with him read to him I was wasting time on purpose/led him on, not watching out for the last threads of myself left that he didn’t sever.
I am binge watching your videos! All of these are spot on when it comes to my ex best narcissist friend. Still ongoing drama after cutting her off 2 months ago. She goes to my church. She's trying so hard to make me look like i misunderstood all of what she has said and done. Praise God i have church leaders and friends who have experienced exactly the same thing and they are helping to keep her away from me and making scenes! Unfortunately i have to be in the same room with her several times a week. I refuse to leave my church which my husband and I have called home for 12 years just to avoid her. I'm so much stronger than she gives me credit for!
The self deprecation makes them look codependent at first. I used to have a housemate like that, it threw me off when she switched on me while we were literally in the middle of hanging out. It was also right before my birthday, which she also tried to ruin.
Your hair looks great, and thank you for teaching me the real definition of a narcissist, it has helped me start getting over her. i never even considered being done and always let her hoover bc i thought it was mental health, shes just a narcissist. i appreciate you
love your videos but you explain the exact same thing in most of them just in slightly different ways. gaslighting has been in the last 3 I've watched?!
