TikTok's Horrible Advice For Men 

the way they brought up asexuality without insulting it but used it as an excuse to be misogynistic 😭😭

"non conventional neckwear" *cuts to Jarvis wearing a rubiks cube*

As a lesbian, I can confirm that I train solely for the purpose of looking attractive to men.

Saying that womens brain finishes developing 8 years earlier gives me extremely predatory vibes.. men always try to find ways to rationalize dating barely legal women

As a married woman, I can personally tell you that not sharing your feelings with your partner will end your marriage. That guy is a child and has no idea what he is talking about.

"Women only work out for guy's attention" makes gyms incredibly dangerous for women and feminine people. I've been followed nearly every time I've gone to the gym, and no one stopped to ask if I was ace.

I so desperately want to start an "Alpha Female" podcast where we take whatever dumb shit these "aLpHa pOdCaSt" bros are saying and flip it around, switching the genders to watch guys freak tf out and cry foul XD Might even have a male guest or two just to tell them I can't take them seriously when they're dressed that way XD

Yes, hide your feelings from your girlfriend. Hide your wallet from your girlfriend. Hide from your girlfriend. Remove all social meeting & claim a mountain cave. Spend your day catching fish & counting stars. Take on the aesthetic of the wild. Grow hair everywhere. Walk slowly and hide from hikers. Become sasquatch.

I like how these guys accept that asexuals don't work out to impress the other sex, but gay and lesbian people? WHO KNOWS why they work out

I’m genuinely concerned and worried for men who perceive the world like this.

absolutely hilarious to me that their misogyny is ace inclusive lmfao

ok but I’m honestly impressed that they even know what being asexual is

When i was younger i thought i was attracted to feminine men bc i like men who are sensitive and in touch with their emotions and not ashamed about it. But now i realize i just like mature men lol sensitivity shouldn't be seen as a feminine trait it should be seen as a well-adjusted human trait. Share your feelings with your girl 👏

I get so frustrated when people refuse to believe that people work out for reasons other than attracting sexual partners. They're basically telling on themselves. It's also just self centered of these guys to think that the only reason a woman goes to the gym is to make their peepee hard. Give me a fucking break. I'm a muscular woman who works out 5-6 days a week because it's one of the only thing that makes a dent in my mental health. But yeah I guess i'm just lying to myself according to these guys

I broke up with a guy who shared his feelings with me. His feelings, it turned out, were that I was a lesser human being because I was a woman and that 'good men like him have to settle for lesser women'. Man went on a whole tirade about how he was too good for me but society doesn't value men like him so he had to take me. Like, yeah, I broke up with that misogynist trash for sharing his 'logic'.

the idea of women maturing faster lead to me being sexualised a lot as a young girl and even groomed. especially for those who hit puberty faster.

I feel like the whole "women mature faster than men" thing has come about mostly as a way for men to excuse their shitty behavior well into adulthood, as well as an excuse for them to seem less creepy for lusting after younger women (even though sexist guys will simultaneously infantalize adult women)

Good job shouting out Chad Chad's video, it was excellent! Looking forward to watching yours!

Yeah... "The bottom half" has the same energy as calling women "Females" 😬😬

you know that guy who "vented everything to his girl" and got broken up with the next day said some wild shit

The point about male and female brains maturing at different rates is actually being studied further, and a couple studies are finding that the differences may be due more to nurture than nature. Men historically have been allowed to act more "childishly" as children than women. (Childish being actions and activities that are age-appropriate but often only considered so for boys but not girls). "Boys will be boys" and all that while girls are expected to be prim and proper, not get dirty and be quiet. These stereotypes may have caused girls to mature faster to keep up with the gender roles assigned. That's what I've understood while looking into it, but as you said, everything is pretty inconclusive. I'm more inclined to believe that there really is no male or female brain though, just culturally instilled values and stereotypes based on gender, class, race, etc.

Correction: They’re ALSO doing it for the male gaze. It’s men that defined the optimal male as a jacked gym bro. The female gaze is different

I remember I was taught that both genders fully develop their personality, traits, hobbies, and physical appearance, etc at 25. So the guy saying that a woman fully develops at 22 and a guy at 35 is definitely not right..

If I dated a guy and he told his friends all his problems but never came to me, I would feel insulted like he didn’t even trust me with his feelings

as somebody who had a “i have to be hyper masculine to be a man” phase, they’re just repeating stuff i’ve told myself and considering how bad i felt abt myself at that time period, they’re advice is shit

My boyfriend has cried in front of me on a few different occasions. And you know what happened? Our relationship got stronger and we both feel confident and comfortable enough with each other to safely share our feelings with the other at any time, knowing it'll be well received. It's almost like allowing yourself to be vulnerable with someone THAT close to you fosters better communication and better relationships. 🤔🤔🤔

Gender roles are such an L. They're just outdated at this point. If they work for some people idc, but I'd rather be in an equal relationship instead of some weird boss/follower split of roles that really isn't needed anymore.

I love that they think people have careers just to be attractive. Bitch, I’ve got bills to pay. Also, the fact they said they only have friend networks to be attractive… Yikes.

"Vented to my girl and she left me the next day" Did you vent about how unhappy you were in the relationship or how toxic and awful she was?

I love how all of these experts are incredibly young guys lacking experience in life, relationships, and psychology classes. Sorry, but when women get older, they won't put up with a man who isn't sharing emotions with them. Real adult life is full of hardships: miscarriages, financial problems, layoffs, parenting issues, and if the man won't share his feelings about those negative events, the woman is going to feel totally alone and the relationship is going to break down. JFC, haven't these kids learned anything from talking to their divorced grandparents? I'm Gen X...all of this "advice" is the same dumb "advice" our parents were given. All bad.

_You think some people follow their own dreams and live happy, healthy, fulfilling lives because they want to? NO. It's because they want to get laid!_ I can't even describe how stupid this way of thinking is and I'm pretty sure I lost braincells just having heard it.

"women should tell us what they want >:(" "we want you to open up to us" "no you don't"

"vented my feelings and she broke up with me." I would love to hear what his feelings were. They could be "I feel unimportant and depressed." Or it could be "I feel like you are not putting enough makeup on and need to lose weight." Both could be considered sharing their feelings. But one is very understandable why they would break up.

The sad truth these bros aren't prepared for is that women specifically don't deadlift and bench press in front of dudes like this because they're ALWAYS compelled to give us unsolicited "advice" on what we're doing, and they're usually very wrong.

Jarvis I love you and everything you say so much. I'm 38 and randomly found out that my 16 year old watches you too and it made me so happy. They're nonbinary and people like you make them feel seen and safe and loved. Thank you.

If your girl breaks up with you after "venting everything to her" she might have put up with a lot of compensatory behaviour of yours by then. Not showing how you feel will still show something's off and that might not be in a good way. She would have broken up with you anyway. He doesn't even mention what exactly he "vented" there. That might also give a clue. Or you just shouldn't have been with her anyway, as Jarvis states.. I love how my husband and I share tears and all sorts of moving moments, good or sad. No idea how that would make him weak.

never cry in front of your girl. get a boyfriend instead, and share your problems with him. issue resolved

"Unless you're asexual, don't come at me with that argument" Looks like it's my time to shine!

The asexuality thing: I don't think it has anything to do with sexuality bc yk asexual people could technically work out to get validated by other people without it being a sexual thing. Same goes for people that aren't asexual bc even if you're not asexual your top priority/goal won't always be to get laid (at least for a lot of people). It doesn't matter what your sexuality is, you could be working out for yourself, for external validation/admiration, for your health, to fit into beauty standards or for sex appeal. But probably just some mix of that.

“men observing toxic masculinity with increasing incredulity” is my favourite genre of comedy

These guys are the type of people who think that women only work out to look hot until women actually start to look strong af, and then they do they criticise them for not looking attractive anymore.

"Men start to mature at 15, women start to mature between 14 and 16." Buddy, I've got news for you about what number comes between 14 and 16...

"Don't share your emotions with your partner, my girl broke up with me the next day" Did you share that you were hooking up with their best friend and that you don't like her going out in revealing clothes?

It makes me so happy to see bigger creators shouting out Chad Chad she's so funny

it's so strange how he is so very close to realising the pressure that a patriarchal society puts on women, and notes all the negative consequences of it, but then just stops before he gets to that point. his whole podcast is "hey, women are more valued for their looks and men are more valued for their accomplishments... what a crazy observation I have made, but that must be *just how it is* and I won't delve deeper into the topic because I cannot look at anything from a non-male perspective"

also the “big, muscular, big shoulder small hips” man is not the female gaze, that’s the male gaze! men respect muscular men, but women for the most part (of course there are women who like muscular men, but like i said for the most part) women don’t like muscular men. look at BTS, timothe chalamet, tom holland, tom huddleston, matthew gray gublar, etc.

As someone who has been in a relationship for 10 years (living together for 5), not having my boyfriend share his feelings is a red flag. I’m in a relationship with a human being, not a robot. Also, he talked about the “male” being the rock. Like, it doesn’t work like that. Sometimes he is indeed the more stable one and the “rock”. Then there are times, actually it’s happening right now, where I am the “strong” one while he is going through it. It’s a give and take and all about balance.

I love how every one of these “Alphas”, or whatever they classify themselves as, state that you can’t cry in front of your partner. That is the worst advice that they could be promoting to their 13yr old audience. My husband is very emotional and he cry’s in front of me all the time and guess what… I haven’t left him. Because a healthy relationship lets both partners express themselves.

Toxically masculine podcasts like these are very harmful to the men that watch them. “Don’t share your feelings and emotions with your partner” and “always be strong for your girl” sounds like something a toxic parent would nail into their sons head. It’s so sad and unhealthy, especially if the guys watching are teens :(

I've been married for over a decade and if you have to hide your feelings from your wife you're doing it wrong. If your partner doesn't have your back, what's even the point.

Crying infront of your partner and venting to your partner is literally like, part of the point of having a partner? Like you work through stuff together because you love eachother

2:24 it's not like women have been told for decades that working out your upper body will make you look bulky and unattractive...so.....yeah of course we are more likely to just work out the butt and legs... but seriously guys...don't skip leg day...you want to be balanced not just for aesthetics...but also for health...I used to have pretty consistent lower back pain UNTIL I started workout out my lower body more in line of how I would hit my upper body

This is how all of the influencers in this sphere work. Joe Rogan, Ben Shapiro, Jordan Peterson, etc. They say something that anyone can objectively agree with, like you should work on being a better person, then follow it up with the most insane advice ever. Then if anyone disagrees with them on their insane advice their retort is "oh you just don't want people to improve themselves" or use whatever other objectively uncontroversial thing as a cover for their absolutely insane viewpoint.

"At 15, boys learn to dress better" I'm from the mid west and guys here pull out the cargo shorts the second it hits above 45 degrees so I disagree with that statement.

7:00 he needs a copy of that book, "Eats Shoots and Pubes and Stuff"

I go to the gym with my bf almost every day. We both have ADHD and going as a couple to exercise in a gym environment is like one of the best things I can do for my mental health. The habit of daily exercise adds so much structure to my life, since I have to eat because the gym makes me noticeably hungry, I drink more water, I have to take a shower afterwards, i have to make sure my car has gas, etc. The physical changes like strength and muscles are all secondary benefits to the lifestyle change

On International Men's Day, I commented on a lot of posts saying "Hey guys, check up on your guy friends. The best way to breakdown toxic masculinity is to end the stigma around mental health" and then got a bunch of guys LITERALLY DM'ing me asking why don't women ask guys about their feelings? Like, 1, isn't that what I just did? I literally acknowledge men's feelings and reached out and told them to support each other more. And 2, because you think we're HITTING ON YOU when we ask. A video came out around that time about checking up on your male friends and having them respond "you're not like other girls" and why women avoid checking up on their male friends... because men equate ALL FEELINGS with either anger or sex. That's a failing on toxic masculinity. Check up on your boys. Support them in a non-toxic way and get therapy if you can afford it. You CAN do things you enjoy just for yourself. I'm queer and ace. NOTHING I do is for men and yet dude's consistently think that... Why? Human brains develop at a consistent rate if given the right nutrients, stimulation, and healthy emotional releases. Women don't "mature" faster in a biological way, we're forced to grow up faster because men get to be pigs in western society for as long as possible. I was not more mature than my fellow guy classmates. I was just told to shut up more. So I did. "She's mature for her age" is a comment on a trauma response. Is she mature for her age or is she the oldest girl and forced to parent her parents and siblings? Is she mature for her age or was she forced to grow sexually at a young age due to the sexualization of teens in her culture? Is she mature for her age or do you let men the same age act like children without repercussions?

My ears are slowly becoming a horror show because I wrestle. I never thought I was doing any of this exercise to impress girls, but thanks to these guys I know I'm consciously disfiguring myself for the fairer sex.

"Unless you're asexual don't come at me with that argument" I almost DIED

I absolutely lost it when he pointed out the bullet necklace and then the camera cut to him wearing a Rubix cube. Top tier comedy right there 😂

i actually agree that as men we should only be sharing our feelings with the boys. we should also kiss our boys and tell them we love them more pretty good advice for being in a gay relationship. be emotionally vulnerable with your bro lol

I wish you'd touched upon their "working out is easier for women because men have to deal with gravity" moment because 😂😂😂

Me halfway in realizing he’s wearing a Rubik’s cube around his neck:😭😭😭💀💀💀💀💀

11:28 NOOOO DON'T DO THAT! TELL USSSSSS. Communication is KEY it's so fricking important!

“Unless you’re asexual” Wait 😭 This is one of the last kind of places I would expect ace acknowledgement from. Like I’m happy about the acknowledgement but also ??? Anyway, that kinda breaks their whole argument, doesn’t it? If working out is only done to attract people for sex (which, btw, ace people can still enjoy…), and they believe aces wouldn’t be motivated by that, then that means aces are working out only for internal validation. Which means it is possible for someone to work out only for internal validation

“I shared my feelings with a girl and she broke up with me” from these types of guys usually translates to “I trauma dumped on this girl that I’ve had two conversations with before without forewarning and then she felt uncomfortable and I didn’t understand why”

6:24 THAT LAUGH. It was so guttaral it was just like " AHAUH HAUH HAUH HAUH) like almost staged. This is as close as he could get to being a "manly man" without his laugh just being "Testosterone Testosterone Testosterone"

As a woman, I can can say that I don't work out for men. I work out for women :)

An alpha male podcast is the last place I’d expect to hear the word “asexual” lmao

Lord I dated one of these guys and he never opened up. It always hurt the relationship and he took it out on me in controlling unhealthy abusive ways. When he finally opened up about a few things he literally just did it to justify abusive actions. When I broke up with him he pretty much just just went “I’m never sharing anything again this is why you broke up with me I don’t seem strong you basically feminized me I learned my lesson” like no I broke up with you because you were verbally abusive and controlling 💀

12:21 Revisiting this video after a breakup and honestly his lack of communication and emotional expression was a huge catalyst for the breakup. Why be with someone who keeps everything bottled up? You never know what’s going on with them and you never know how to support them. It creates more problems than it’s actually worth. If your not comfortable with being vulnerable with your partner you should look in to therapy and attachment styles.

6:48 ah yes, of course, when you’re 15 the dress sense part of your brain gets developed

"men like butt women like pelvis" i am going to crush these men with my gay little hands

“Women only do leg day” Me, sitting with my stiffened, blister covered hands after a pull day; “Am I a joke to you?”

As a former addict and someone suffering from MDD exercising/working is necessary in my recovery. The physical benefits are just a happy byproduct but NOT the reason I workout.

Love how these alpha bro “men vs women biology” discussions completely ignore the existence of trans people

they use this “women mature faster” argument to groom women and manipulate them.

i love how jarvis starts wearing a rubix cube around his neck after talking about “unconventional neckwear”

I'm extremely depressed that this video was made two years ago and it's STILL a problem.

Jarvis adding the Rubik's cube to his chain in solidarity really shows how much he respects the bros.

I feel so bad for the younger kids who would be looking up to these dudes and then learn later that, that exact behavior needs to be unlearned if you plan on having any sort of adult relationships

"what are men attracted to? the bottom half, the bOOTy" you cannot even imagine my disappointment when they didn't also answer "the bOOTy" for what women are attracted to also the leg day thing might be true, but I wonder how much of that is women that WOULD like to work out their upper bodies as well, but get put off by people telling them they'll get too bulky and "manly"... you know guys that think like these two would probably get some kind of complex if they saw a woman stronger than them lol

I have been a personal trainer for some time now and I find it absolutely bizarre that what men and women "think" is attractive to the opposite sex really isn't what is attractive in most cases.

"Women start developing at like 14, 16?" Like jeeze. Was that a question bro? Because some of us develop in 3rd grade and it is real rough for several years. These guys are so far removed from real life that they didn't even do a google search.

"Is that a rifle bullet?" Yeah, he's just compensating for his exceptionally low caliber.

fun fact: female bodies tend to store fat in the lower part of the body (butt, thighs, and legs) so ofc we’re gonna focus on these parts when we workout

I actually use working out as a coping mechanism for BPD. You know, to help me keep from ✨unaliving✨ myself. But yeah, it’s totally just for male validation fs

7:06 siR, i think you needed a period there. or at least a comma

these people have the most surface level intelligence possible and its so frustrating to see them take every thought they have as absolute fact

"Girls start puberty around 14-16" Girls get their period around 10-14 dude. I was 10. And I started developing at 9. Girls start puberty much earlier lol.

Jarvis: “What is with this non conventional neck ware?” Also Jarvis: *creates a rubiks cube necklace*

Everyone here talking about the nasty men but I'm just so happy Chad Chad is getting the recognition she DESERVES I love her videos she's amazing

"No he's cute and I objectify him bc he's my friend" felt that

I stopped talking to a friend after he vented to me, but not because of the actual venting, but he was emotionally manipulating me into dating him with that venting. He was suicidal and would tell me stuff like "if you wouldn't have responded I would have probably killed myself" and stuff like "I don't have anything to live for in this world I want to live to make you happy" and etc... I would have loved to be there for him as a friend if he didn't keep trying to make me date him but even so, he is someone who has some mental health problems, and I feel sorry for them, but I've also had many mental problems since I was a child, and I don't manipulate people into dating or staying friends with me. I told them to go to therapy but they refused. I don't want to be anyone's reason to live, and nobody should feel that pressure. That stuff might seem sweet in movies but in reality it's very toxic and it's not how a healthy person would think.

adding onto what jarvis said at 13:10, if you talk to your partner about your feelings and they break up with you, you're probably better off without that person in your life anyways. someone who dates you expecting you not to be emotionally intimate with them does not care about you and getting out of that relationship is dodging a bullet.

2:08 loved the rubik’s cube detail following the non conventional objets these dudes were wearing 😭

Why did they go “You don’t have friends for yourself” as if the whole point of having friends is not to fulfill YOUR need for people. Like buddy that’s the whole point?? Also I am very happy that you shouted out Chad Chad because Chad Chad is super awesome

Other than the obvious sexism, what really irks me about these recent “men’s” podcast (and other media) is just how heteronormative they are. Props to them specifically for acknowledging the existence of asexual people, but this whole “Women like xyz” and “Men like xyz” is... icky; Its all’s so gendered! “Men care about women’s butts and women care about men’s v”. As an official gay, I beg to differ. Oh, and that’s to say nothing of the cisnormativity as well.

It's kind of sad though that they cannot wrap their heads around the idea of an emotionally supportive partner or someone exercising as self care (or even why it's not nefarious to exercise to be more attractive- that's a valid motivation too!). Like dang, who hurt them?

I love how he just puts a Rubik’s cube on his chain and does acknowledge it