Understanding Trauma - Part 10 - Healing 

Tim Fletcher is the best thing that has happened to the internet

I realised that my irritability to loud noises and getting quickly mentally drained in crowds was a stress response to my early childhood trauma 🙏

I wish people would spend as much time watching content like this instead of the garbage that fills the internet...the world would be better...😢

God is really real. A weight has been lifted off me. God's peace is amazing

Living so disconnected is painful too. It feels completely empty inside. This is very helpful information.

‘Going into flight/fight/freeze not just in dangerous situations, but in all uncomfortable situations’ this made me feel so understood and a lot of my life just made sense with this perspective. Amazing, thank you Tim🤍

15 years into “healing.” This is the most adept presentation on trauma healing I’ve seen to date. I’ve enjoyed many of your videos. I found myself in therapy at 48 years old after the 2008 market crash. My crash destroyed my career. Luckily, my husband was here and is still here to support me - after many years of thinking I was “faking it.” It’s hard for people that haven’t been through this themselves to believe the depth of the issue. We went through many years of “why can’t you just get over it.” Prayers to all on the journey and especially to those that need to find the journey. I imagine that many are the ones we see living on the streets. Sad.

I've listened to this entire series in one week. WOW 😳. What a FIND! Yes, Tim, this is helping immensely!!! It is amazing to have an explanation for how this works. Your work is a much needed Ministry. ❤️🙏❤️ THANK YOU

In recovery rooms I have heard, "If you don't deal with your trauma, it will deal with you." Also, 'talk it out or act it out.' Simple, but true. And it can take a long time, but is so worth pursuing. Thanks Tim for your videos, and thank you for wanting to help others heal.

Walking in nature helps to calm the frayed nerves 🙏

I got up this morning realizing I need a roll model, I never had one growing up. Tim, you are now my roll model and you wouldn’t believe how old I am. Thank you so very much.😎

He is my favourite RU-vidr now. Been listening nonstop for 2 weeks. He has been tremendousluly helpful in my healing journey. God bless.

Thank you Tim ❤ see you every Friday is something beautiful in my life

Thank you Tim. I’ve found your content a couple of months ago. Considering where I am in my journey currently, this was your best video so far. I have consumed a lot of CPTSD content on RU-vid with varying degrees of quality over the past year after several attempts at “fixing myself” on my own for the past 5 years or so. I really wish I had found these lectures earlier. Would have saved me a lot of trouble, frustration and from taking some misleading paths. Again, thank you for all the work you do.

I'm 71 and was the scapegoat role in a highly narcissistic family of 5 children. I could see how horrible my father was to my Mother and my siblings. He used fear to control all of us. His loud loud voice and my Mother crying was my childhood. I legally changed my name from Merle Dean to Kenji Okazaki Leach because my Mother could not pronounce my name and neither could I. That was 10 years ago and I'm finally understanding the depth of my trauma. I socially transitioned M/F almost 4 years ago. It was the "Single" most healing event in my life. I had to let go of my family, but it was the only way to heal. I live next to a beautiful park in Tulsa, Ok, manage a feral cat colony and post videos of the amazing birds. My videos show just one way I work on healing. It's a life long process, but don't give up. I know there is Hope. Bless you Tim for such good information.

Thank you thank you thank you. You are refreshing my wounded soul . God is using you to heal

Thank you ❤your sessions validate everything I endured and fought emotionally mentally for 50 yrs. I now feel I'm on the road to recovery. God bless you x

I've sent this on to my sister. I have been so frustrated thinking the medical model and now it makes so much more sense what my therapist has been saying. I am progressing. I didn't realize it. My therapist says I've been growing tremendously and I trust her. Thank God, she came into my life. I am still kind of cautious about trusting my own judgment anyway thanks Tim.

I am 76 years. I don’t know if it’s too late to go on this journey. I live in mental torment each moment of each and every day. I believe my pain will stop until I’m dead after living a life all alone in misery.

"Self-compassion: knowing that you have your own friendship no matter what; accepting the person you are right now. If painful emotions do not get resolved, it's too painful to stay connected to them/yourself/other people" Healing=connection + resilience (healing is not linear, there will be setbacks and triggers that are meant to turn our attention to smth important)💛 thank you🙏

Number one online value for emotional self awareness & healing.

Wow! such an amazing amount of expertise on healing, given clearly, humbly, and generously! Thank you, TF; tons of appreciation and gratitude (and awe) from here. Never cease!

Oh my! All of your talks have been so revealing to me, from my own childhood trauma to unknowingly passing along things to my children. To put it bluntly is everyone just f***** up? It seems like most or some of these aspects show up in everyone! It’s overwhelming to me. It’s almost like we have to try and heal from some things but impossible to heal from everything. 😢

I feel so much gratitude 🙏🏻and validation to hear all that you present❣️In a sea of misinformation your gift to the world feels like a pleasure cruise❣️

Thank you Tim, prior to my Dad's passing he said to me "if I could go back I would not of been so hard on you" he knew he was too much bullied me & brothers, he was raised in an in-- house military school fashioned by his awesome immigrant parents, my grandparents, they had 5 children born during the depression, his family went from starving~success as commercial tuna fisherman during 40's ~late 70's early eighties. Dad accepted an athletic scholarship Stanford football economics. My brothers are so damaged it's scary they make bad decisions. My Dad suffered extreme tuff upbringing, had an older brother that bullied him ruthlessly. I need to join and get serious coupling, relationships. I self isolate picked great looking husbands on the outside, abusive so divorced them etc., really no regrets, I will try to get your help! It's so tuff to find a good therapist, that individually also connect with, but you obviously help thru connection many/myself, Thank you I've significantly healed due to you, God bless you & yours.

Bless you, Tim, for your wonderful series on complex trauma. I see myself and so many others mirrored therein and secrets to recovery have been unlocked. The service you are providing is invaluable, including your unique guidance and perspective. By watching together with my hubby, it unveiled so many secrets I was incapable of explaining in a way he could understand and relieved a huge burden from me and us. I'm so lucky to have a safe and supportive spouse who is eager to understand and participate in a healing relationship. He is the first and only person to be that for me. I'm 65, we've been together for almost 25 years, and our healing journey is very active and ongoing, both very painful at times and also overwhelmingly rewarding. I just wanted to encourage folks to watch this together with a trusted other and see where that takes them.

This is so helpful. Thank you very much for sharing with us. It's tough at times. Coming out of a lot of brokeness. Having to raise my grandson who is in his teens. At times the state of being exhausted never seems to leave. To have a relationship seems mission impossible. Gladly walking with God has healed me a lot already. But I do reach points of despair and hopelessness. Constantly fighting battles. ...

I had a perceived rejection today that really smarted for a while. I started using some ideas from your lecture and was able to understand myself and behave. I feel wonderful about that. Thank you so much.

In my life I notice, that as I go through life events and the adult developmental stages, I have to revisit the healing process. New waves of memories trigger old wounds, and then new insights arise when I am truthful with myself. "Take captive every thought" as the Bible says.

Love this. I attended a local class about this and we created a ‘soul map’ with our life’s journey. We then visited and wrote about each part of that map but bringing back in the joy. I had forgotten so many wonderful signs of love/nurture etc I received because I was focussed on the trauma. It has changed my life. A lot of my traumas I can revisit now but they feel like memories there are no big emotions attached to them x

Thank you so much for putting this material out there for those of us who need it. ❤️ Learning so much and inspired to get back to my own journey of healing. Amazing work, Tim! Bless 🙏

I love watching all of Tim’s videos. ❤ They have been very affirming and eye opening. It helps that there is someone so talented and caring about these topics to discuss them. I love that he goes so in depth, it is very helpful.

With where I am in my journey this episode spoke volumes. TYSM 🙏. In my country mental health care through a doctor is practically non-existent - leading to high suicide rates - but all I needed was this video that validates everything I’m going through. Being triggered constantly and the world no longer feels safe, I can’t work, got financial responsibilities etc that compounds the cycle. But this video will help me do some of the work myself. ❤

God bless you, Tim. I used to go for talk therapy once a week for some time. I was given some tools, for sure. However, my therapist was very impatient and i even faked it for her just to keep up with the pace. I now understand why i feel like i haven't really had trauma therapy... no wondr!! Thank you & God bless you.

I so appreciate your content. You have helped me and everyone I come in contact with. Yay God! Thank you.

Healing is for rich people who have the time and convenience.

I was ready to go to the next level of learning and healing and i found this amazing resource on the internet. Its really helping

Mr. Fletcher, thank you for putting all this content out there. I had severe trauma inside of me that I know I need to work on and fix. All this knowledge is precious and life-saving. I am so grateful. God bless you sir

Great at explaining CPTSD. Very knowledgeable!! Thank you 🙏 ❤️‍🩹

Bless you Tim (& all who help with making these wonderful videos) ~ Thank you for such clarity & illumination & realisations ~ Love & Gratitude 🙏🤗 And thank you for "the Christian part" too - I've had considerable difficulty for many years with all that but am enjoying your approach & presentation - thank you ❤

Thank you so much finally God made somebody that wants to truly help others in a tangible way emotionally and spiritual the body follows ,absolutely fantastic job Oh the Holly Spirit in you can be felt !Praise and Glory to God !

For those who are struggling to heal from any traumatic experience, these videos are eyeopeners to the real aspects of what they are going through and how to gradually heal by applying the guidelines Tim has advocated and get the real therapy that supports his work🙏

So, so good! 🙏🏾 This has been my journey thus far. 🙌🏾

A M A Z I N G ! ! ! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!!

Tim, Thank you Thank you Thank you for working with all of the pain of others and staying intact, then morphing into a master healer. Your amazing. Trae

Thank you lm regularly tunings in to your talks.

Thank you so much! 🙏

Complex trauma takes so much time!!!! It is such a process. Reprocessing the trauma needs to be acknowledged once in a safe place, that is why isolation and art is super therapeutic! It is not a straight line!!! The journey is such a roller coaster! Listening to this video!! I am so incredibly happy to have come across your page! I would really like to connect with you to share my story and help be of service to others!!!

You are such a wonderful teacher! Now I am learning to understand myself and others better and my everyday life becomes smoother and healthier. Thank you!

All the years of therapy, all the years of research and seeking God and you, one man, have finally validated what I’m dealing with and helped me to understand that there’s hope. It’s like you’re talking to me specifically. 😂 I’m very grateful for you.

Great information. Needed this

Great video again Tim! Thank you!

Thank you, wonderful information that is so critically helpful.

Prayers

Grateful for this man and channel. Thank you

Thanks!

Many thanks for all these insights and giving me hope 🙏 that I can stop this life sentence ....

Im so grateful for your knowledge u have me in tears everytine I watch one of your videos because you speak of things I couldn’t even find words for So distressing to be diagnosed with CPTSD n that’s it hers medication for depression ?! N that’s all the psychiatrist knows about it and any mental health social worker Clueless ! I’m having to study these videos in order to save my own life n I can only remember bits here n there Thanks for every video you have made and may God bless and protect you and all your loved ones 🙏🏻💜🎶🧚‍♀️🌹✨💕🌸🤍

Thank you ❤❤❤ so helpful!

Thank you for this incredible video.

Depending on the person psychedelic mushrooms can boost this process significantly

I have been using Psychedelics for the last three years for my CT depression. Disassociation disorder, etc. I have tried all the medication‘s that were prescribed to me and I never worked and I’ve been in therapy for over 40 years. For me using psilocybin as prescribed by the national library of medicine‘s research papers it allowed me to process the trauma without being overwhelmed by the emotion of it it allowed me to run down a rabbit hole, chasing the threat of thought to the end, and discovering what caused the trigger. It is a tool. The benefits were not instant, but they are becoming long-term intact. I do not recommend it for everybody, but for me, it is kept me from suicide, and I see a future with hope despite the pain that surrounds me daily. This is because of psilocybin’s and willingness to be in therapy every week and stripped myself down and find out the truth of the trauma so long.

I've spent years healing myself with different modalities. Blimey this is depressing as I've still got loads to do! Feels like it's never ending! I have never had any support and still don't. I think that's part of a massive problem for me. That part of me feels f@ked! What a Godsend you are thankyou

Hi Dad, can I came home ?‼️ Recovery is a gift. And it’s everything Tim said… From this: 💔 to this: ❤️‼️. Tim did it. (And his loving staff)

Thank you for your work. I am in the process of healing, but the ups and downs made me think maybe i am bipolar. Now i understand the mechanism a lot better.

Thank you for your teaching. I really really miss your Bible studies! That's what drew me to you in the first place. Hope you will add that back to your therapy. Mahalo Nui

Oh ❤you’re the best, finding you starting to fix me , oh my helping me understand why I keep falling for same guy different package

Great work! Thank you.

The scary movie & roller coaster metaphors for reprocessing trauma are brilliant

Thank you so much Tim! I love the last comment about psychedelics. I was able to heal very deep wounds with MDMA and psilocybin, yet I still have a long way to go in changing my negative thinking and repressed emotions.

I started a therapy that I created myself. 1) Write a list of abuse and trauma that you have experienced as far back as you can remember. Look at old photos. 2) You might want to start with narcissism. 3) Define the abuse 4) Write down the characteristics and tactics used in this abuse. 5) Now a list of characteristics that describe how this affects adult life. Write letters to yourself from the surrogate parent's voice expressing empathy, concern, and convition that you can still live a good life. This was not about you, it was about them.

Thank you im getting into therapy for sure. Great advice🎉🎉🎉

Amazing stuff ❤ you're really fantastic

I found emdr very helpful. It gave me thr ability to set boundaries around toxic people. Sadly it took me decades to find the right therapist who does emdr. 40 years of therapy on and off, mostly on. A lot if time. A lot of mone. A lot of therapists are useless

Thanks

Absolutely 🙏

Thank you

I ❤ Tim Fletcher - sent by our Creator and our Creators universal law of attraction - dedicated with extreme detailed empathy and so very insightful - if its too late fir me at nearly 69 and in all ways of health - listen to his videos among those like him and -- -- follow his calculated words with wisdim - do not wait or slack off -

Love you❤

I feel like I will never going to have the opportunity to heal. Unfortunately, to be able to heal, you need to be able to afford it. And I, someone who self-destructed my own life, can barely pay rent...

And medicare will only subsidise 5 sessions with a psychologist. This is not even enough to begin to trust the therapist, but just long enough to open a whole mess of wounds before releasing you back out into the world in a state of terror and despair. You can't do it alone, but help is not that easy to find.

Great, invaluable knowledge by Tim. I'm starting my healing now, being 40 years old and getting to grips how having 2 angry parents has affected me. Please somebody help him organize his videos on his yt channel. It's so hard to navigate as it is.

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="3502">58:22</a> i healed my trauma and mental illness by writing it down before the trip and reading it out loud during numerous psychedelic trips. but i only trip if i have THCA to destroy anxiety/future and CBD to destroy depression/past. Never use THC with psychedelics because it just dulls the trip and if it's sativa, it can increase anxiety and if it's indica it can make you sleepy. I need to tell my story and share my protocol because without THCA (and CBD) you don't have a rubber isolator under the building to protect it during emotional psychedelic earthquakes you are inducing to recollect catalyze and neutralize bad memories into inert facts. #thca from Jade Nectar.

I pray and have at least some hope to the end - someone will come and break into this cruel cult surrounding me and my name throughout my life before my 70th birthday next year. I am in bad health in every way that never shouldve been. I didnt know no matter how i was abused. It hurt more to hate but they all covered it up as they do now and convince all i encounter of their bad deeds to me to blame me - for at present - the most humanly impossible sinful crimes- hideous when it began with my baby boomer siblings - and what escalated as they shut me down for most of my life- i fear they and all they still try to gaslight - are leading the overall good people presently in this world to an evil means to the end of all good- truth- love- innocense-light- kindness- spirituality way over materialism before it is too late. Please believe me. And I thank you and i pray God continues to bless *** Tim Fletcher.

The trouble is there are not enough therapists counsellors who understand the complexity of child complex PTSD, The help they provided me was one hour per week for eight weeks counselling, that adds up to one day, how can they expect people to process a life time of supressed feelings and emotions brought on by the experience's? Also the first day of counselling i was presented with a form to sign, I was like why have i got to sign a form to get counselling? I said i would take it home and read it properly before i signed it, I was so glad i did, as it was not just a form, it was a contract, and it literally said that if the individual seeking counselling was assumed to be a threat as in a "terrorist" or may commit "treason" they can send "outside agents" to come and take you away! What the heck is all that about? I did not sign that contract that is held against you for five years, how many people seeking help knew that was a contract they were signing? The therapist said I was the only one who had a problem signing it? Maybe that's because the people signing it were not able to think straight due to all their unresolved trauma! You do not always have to have anyone else to help heal from past trauma, yes its good to have someone to rebound your words off, to repeat what you have just said, as sometimes we speak and we are not aware of what we are saying. Yet there are tools we were given that we were born with that can help us to reconnect and process what the child we were had no way of processing. If we cannot find the right individual who can help us we can use the creative tools to do it. Writing down your memories can trigger of other memories that we may have forgotten, using colour, form, shapes, lines, doodles abstract painting, can reveal so much about us, dreams also helpful, write down your dreams, you can travel into your past in dreams, i went back many times to be with the little girl i once was, being chased by a vampire, i held her hand and let her know she was not alone. I even dreamt of myself as an angry sad teen, I was an adult in the dream chasing myself down the road i wanted to hug her and tell her everything would be okay, but my teen self was so full of fear, she ran away. That's when i realised i had been running away from myself, when we choose really choose in our hearts to change, even when we don't know how to change, if we put in the effort to acknowledge and to process the emotions and feelings created by the experiences we find those creative tools in the process. I was diagnosed as dyslexic as an adult, still have trouble with grammar spelling, yet i have improved so much since oi first began writing down my thoughts and feelings. At first all words were jumbled my writing made no sense what so ever, i could not even read it as the spellings were so bad. Part of me wanted to just give up! Yet that other part of me was like NO! if you give up who are you giving up on? MYself, i would be giving up on myself, so i continued, i wrote whatever i could remember down, i got a computer for the dyslexia and it helped me spell, I gave the little girl i was a voice, and a creative way to express her pain. Years of painting doodlings, produced childlike images, childlike drawings, expressions of a trouble soul. Then over the years i began to notice the changes, i also found i had a gift of writing poetry, i ad a spiritual experience that seemed to unlock my creativity, after i had cried a sea of tears over a two year period, my tears would flow like a broken tap, i could not speak at all at first the sobs were overwhelming me, i did not know how to speak? I was an adult in the body only inside i was a child who had not grown I had to learn everything again, how to express my feelings, how to communicate without swearing using profanities, they were my only language at that time. I had learnt I was not as angry and i could now go outside without people wanting to fight me, the anger within me that was a magnet to other angry lost people was diminished, the two years of crying had washed it away, and replaced it with calm crystal waters, i saw colour for the first time, colour that made me stand in awe! That may sound strange, but all i saw before that must have been black and white, grey like the way i felt. However now the colour was vibrant and i could not get over the beauty of the flowers around me. Crystal waters giving us eyes to see in colour, all that abuse had darkened and dirted my inner waters so i could not see colour, and had distorted my perception of myself and the world around me. I am 57 now, and still processing, sometimes i feel i am back in a rut, and get a tad mad at myself, but watching Tims videos has made me realise i am doing better than i thought, It maybe a longer healing process recovering on your own, yet it is achievable, using the tools mentioned, I just wanted to share that with others who may also be struggling to find the right help. Stereo Surrounded by trapped emotions My feelings and voice was unheard I was locked in this box of confusion My memories were shoddy and blurred Forward is my destination Rewind is the past that made me Play is my role in this picture Pause is my hope to be free

I would love to have, and be a part of a support group

Me and my 2 cats were evicted. 2 more days and my section 8 voucher expires. Still here under cruel sadistic - wildly immature bullying & manipulative life threat no one to trust - no kin ever- or friends - shut down here for over a decade by liars from😮 society's high to low - thinking- - lame in my legs - thinking good thoughts - physical moves in chores etc help -meantime - holding on minute by minute - praying too - waiting for the once in my life - help sent by the Lord's power of attraction for us - faith, hope but the best 💘

The hardest part for me is finding safe people or a support system, where are they?

Universal healthcare.

German language is not easy, I live here 31 years ago. I am still learning... VPO.. TY!

Therapy is a useful tool, but it can be invalidating how people seem to think that going to therapy is a simple solution or that sitting your butt at a therapist's office every week is making you healthier each time. If only it worked that way.

Me too

My son is stuck in horrible trauma. Completely isolated himself, he will not talk to me, won’t look at me. He hides when I come home. He will be 18 in a few weeks. I’ve tried to ask for forgiveness for what he has been through (divorce, court, his dads issues, making him feel abandoned) and anything else I don’t know about but wish he would tell me. Or would’ve told me. His brother has tried to reach him and he has completely pushed away. So now, all I can think to do (which is my own survivor ways) is to let him be, Not to push, since I tried several times and it has backfired. His anger/hurt has destroyed my house. I don’t know what the next few weeks or months will bring. I need him to move out and maybe then he can heal? He wants me to suffer as much as he is. And I am. No matter how many times I ask him to get help even together. It’s torture

Everything always says you need safe, healthy community to relate to. How do you find that when you are so far past being done with trusting the wrong people that you're JUST DONE with people? I have literally made dozens of attempts at finding community; but all I've gotten are DOZENS OF FURTHER DISCONFIRMING EXPERIENCES. Really isn't anywhere for me in this world. I've been in therapy 15 years, going nowhere effective enough. I have never had basic security in my life. I am constantly treading water. I'm not sure why I bother treading water and making outreach attempts when all my attempts just keep me in water...for more treading. :(

Engine overhaul plus precision welding the cracked block back together 😉

Back to safety=Get back! get back! get back to where you once belonged.

Mushrooms took me out of deep depression and allowed me to start healing but as he said the sessions were quite dark and I know it can give you psychosis if you’re not careful but it’s like you’re dealing with all the years of trauma at once.

What if it takes decades. And in spite of all the hard work, -all the sacrifice, all the processing, all the progress, you're actually sicker than you were at the start. I've been almost entirely in bed for the past 12 months. The flashbacks are constant and with the flashbacks I'm in so much constant physical pain i can't be up.

This guy, Dr. Scott Giacomucci mentioned " Post Traumatic Growth" and " Vicarious Post Traumatic Growth." Maybe you could put Complex at the beginning of those words. It has to do with learning from yours and others trauma, and maybe even helping others if you're strong enough and want to learn to do that.

Help me. *** Our Father - Who Art in Heaven- hallow be thy name - thy kingdom come - thy will be done - on earth - as it is in heaven - give (me) us this day - (my) our daily bread - for😅 give (me) us any wrong we (I) did - and lead (me) us not - into temptation - deliver (me) us from evil. Amen. <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="411">6:51</a>