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You Don’t Lose People. You Return Them | Stoic Philosophy 

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Most people struggle significantly after losing their loved ones, which seems to be a natural phenomenon. Also, the mere prospect of losing someone close to us triggers anxiety in many. But the Stoics observed that the fear of loss and the torturing distress of grief are consequences of irrational thinking. This video explores Stoic philosophy in the context of attachment, loss of loved ones, and how to deal with being separated from those we care about.
Video: You Don't Lose People. You Return Them | Stoic Philosophy
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00:00 - Intro
01:34 - Our attachments to people
04:34 - People aren't yours
08:08 - Emotional assent
11:13 - Seneca's letter
#stoicism #epictetus #stoic

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22 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 2,5 тыс.   
@FelixSkura
@FelixSkura 2 года назад
Stop breaking your own heart by exaggerating your place in someone else’s life. Don’t be afraid of losing people. Be afraid of losing yourself, when you trying not to lose someone else.
@undynetheundying5405
@undynetheundying5405 2 года назад
"Stop breaking your own heart by exaggerating your place in someone else's life." This! I did not understand this for the longest time. Thank you for putting it into words so clearly and concisely.
@JDog2656
@JDog2656 2 года назад
"Be afraid of losing yourself, when you trying not to lose someone else." That's something I am personally afraid of. I don't want to let my love for someone turn me into something bad if its taken away
@H4RLM
@H4RLM 2 года назад
💯🏆
@aneshrathomas
@aneshrathomas 2 года назад
Definitely
@All_forthelove
@All_forthelove 2 года назад
Im going to screenshot this 🥰😊☺️ gracias Felix
@carldawes4156
@carldawes4156 7 месяцев назад
"Imagine loving someone so much that you'd do anything for them." "Now imagine that someone being yourself."
@rosemarietolentino3218
@rosemarietolentino3218 6 месяцев назад
That sounds like how we are supposed to achieve to be one in marriage. It’s actually one of the twelve mysteries of G. written about in the B.
@aleedersart
@aleedersart 6 месяцев назад
Words with an impact... beautiful suggestion. I really needed to hear that. Ty
@agmhelena7266
@agmhelena7266 5 месяцев назад
i needed that thanks
@rosie6
@rosie6 5 месяцев назад
da m n
@weiiming98
@weiiming98 5 месяцев назад
wow
@ilovethemoon04
@ilovethemoon04 Год назад
One thing I learnt that has helped me when I’ve lost someone important is to realise that the person you lost didn’t make you feel the love you felt, it was you. You created that love and you made them the centre of it but really it was you.
@julietai7465
@julietai7465 Год назад
Beautifully said!
@jair_rey2494
@jair_rey2494 Год назад
🤯
Год назад
It's also a shared bond, even when your feelings are your own... The bonds the moments you share the memories That's what's ultimately left behind. They may be your feelings, but they're never one-sided.
@marcelaperez4126
@marcelaperez4126 Год назад
I’m gunna put it here because this gave me ease. I left everything and everyone over a PROMISE my ex gave me. I had never felt more alone in my life. I kept letting him, and every time even when it was sporadic, I felt used. He would say “I do miss you” while having a gf this whole time. This made me realize I can’t let this make me feel sad after leaving him for good. I lost me. I lost everything that made me .. me. I was love. Thank you ❤️
@kericaswell6084
@kericaswell6084 Год назад
I'm sorry to hear that Marcela. I lost myself too. 13 years single now. I pray you are healing
@nimsilva9898
@nimsilva9898 Год назад
“I still love the people I’ve loved, even if I cross the street to avoid them.” -Uma Thurman
@MortyMT
@MortyMT Год назад
Thats what she said
@vipulchandak9084
@vipulchandak9084 Год назад
@@MortyMT 😂😂
@carlosr192
@carlosr192 Год назад
I don't know why...but your fears you attract more then your dreams. There are exceptions but a lot of people never dream some of there's achievements.
@kyrianjoseph1403
@kyrianjoseph1403 Год назад
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@talesfromprincesajesa
@talesfromprincesajesa Год назад
I love this quote
@mountainhobbit1971
@mountainhobbit1971 2 года назад
the more we try to control something, the more it ends up controlling us.
@jamesmcmccray8255
@jamesmcmccray8255 2 года назад
Wow that’s resonated with me
@kingtoxtle6128
@kingtoxtle6128 Год назад
@@jamesmcmccray8255 same brother same 😅
@carliecaperan7622
@carliecaperan7622 Год назад
This.
@roulinna
@roulinna Год назад
so true!
@bethrem2240
@bethrem2240 Год назад
Mientras más tratamos de controlar algo, al finalizar, nos controla más de lo que queríamos controlar.
@unfixingbowl5454
@unfixingbowl5454 2 года назад
Don’t force situations. Let people do as they please. Only make the effort if it’s returned if not move on in any type of relationship. Only permanent thing in your life is yourself. Everything else is a variable
@mouradss5342
@mouradss5342 2 года назад
Who are you . That was sick reall neeed to read that ty sm
@rebelpoxy
@rebelpoxy 2 года назад
Even ourselves ain't permanent though. Ourselves are just the only thing we can control.
@ioannisaliazis
@ioannisaliazis 2 года назад
So true
@nicholaskearney678
@nicholaskearney678 2 года назад
Thanks, brilliant thoughts, I agree ..
@iCOOKanything
@iCOOKanything 2 года назад
Easier said than done
@memesinc5852
@memesinc5852 Год назад
That sick feeling in your gut means that your love was true. Its healthy to feel this way. The difficult task is letting go and not letting it consume us.
@wonniera
@wonniera 10 месяцев назад
I can attest to his. I was in several relationships before I finally found someone who I felt genuine love for. He broke up with me through text just today. Thank you for your comment. It honestly helped me feel a little better to know that this kind of reaction to something like this is okay.
@slimshidy2451
@slimshidy2451 10 месяцев назад
So other people feel that "gut" feeling? I thought it was just me😢
@mark9294
@mark9294 10 месяцев назад
@@slimshidy2451yes
@sjla2009
@sjla2009 10 месяцев назад
I finally found the love of my life. But, he was a fraud. Big lesson learned.
@Reborn2-27
@Reborn2-27 10 месяцев назад
@@wonnieramy girlfriend broke up with me just yesterday. We were coming up on our year anniversary. I feel your pain and hope you’re okay
@bluesign3034
@bluesign3034 Год назад
Separating is hard. But sometimes, loving someone means wanting what's best for them and letting their life take them where they need to be.
@LavendLady
@LavendLady 11 месяцев назад
Amen.
@shanti888
@shanti888 10 месяцев назад
Amen
@yfoog
@yfoog 3 месяца назад
Yes that’s true
@teefrankenstein4340
@teefrankenstein4340 Месяц назад
💯
@gilbertodepiento8521
@gilbertodepiento8521 18 дней назад
Amen
@xp1296
@xp1296 2 года назад
Be willing to walk alone. Many who started with you won't finish with you
@archravenineteenseventeen
@archravenineteenseventeen Год назад
Like a space shuttle
@silvermine2033
@silvermine2033 Год назад
This is very true!
@SkyePhoenix
@SkyePhoenix Год назад
We all die alone.
@Halonoobs1000
@Halonoobs1000 Год назад
The top of the mountain is lonely
@christopherhogan691
@christopherhogan691 Год назад
@@Halonoobs1000 it already seems to get lonlier on the way up the mountain. Life seems after a certain point to take away more than it gives.
@user-yv1ru4oo1m
@user-yv1ru4oo1m 2 года назад
Life is not about winning or gaining, it's about accepting and letting go.
@unfixingbowl5454
@unfixingbowl5454 2 года назад
“It’s not about winning or losing it’s about how you play the game”
@homonid
@homonid 2 года назад
Isn't that Nihilism? 🤔
@ravisalunke677
@ravisalunke677 2 года назад
Its not about to achiving but experiencing and leaving.
@farnhoune4237
@farnhoune4237 2 года назад
Life is about nothing, you decide what is important for you.
@neurogeek3720
@neurogeek3720 2 года назад
@@farnhoune4237 "Knowing that it can't be perfect but you try to make it as perfect as you possibly can . We all are different, so dance in your box in the best way you possibly can. Choose your own box and just be you . There's no gimmick "
@foresttaniguchi3168
@foresttaniguchi3168 3 месяца назад
Let her go. Just let her go. Especially if there’s any chance she loves you. Don’t try and manipulate her through revealing your inner sadness. Keep it inside you. Don’t tell her how much she means to you. You already did that and if she didn’t value it then she won’t value it now. She is getting her happiness somewhere else. You need to do the same. Look inside yourself for the respect and consolation you need. Look to the father in heaven.
@latayapenn9601
@latayapenn9601 Месяц назад
OMG so profound. Well put.
@JoshuaGLuces
@JoshuaGLuces Месяц назад
Needed to her this!
@Beautiful121
@Beautiful121 Месяц назад
😢true
@gilbertodepiento8521
@gilbertodepiento8521 18 дней назад
Thank You
@michaelgreenwood2844
@michaelgreenwood2844 8 дней назад
Thank you because I needed to hear this. I’M IN SO MUCH PAIN
@Camila_Gonzalez420
@Camila_Gonzalez420 Год назад
When I think about not being able to see someone ever again then I get this feeling in my chest and it’s so strong .
@NWOALERT
@NWOALERT Год назад
Breathe deeply into that sensation
@shanti888
@shanti888 10 месяцев назад
I know that one too well, having suffered much abandonment as a child
@HorusTortoise
@HorusTortoise 10 месяцев назад
Lost my love after 5 years. The rational part of me wants to move on and heal, the animal part of me wants to be a monster.
@nicholasmitchum4902
@nicholasmitchum4902 10 месяцев назад
That feeling doesn't go away until long after. And only when u stop thinking about wanting That feeling to go away.
@Braxton-xk5bi
@Braxton-xk5bi Месяц назад
That's just acid reflux 😂
@MikeJackson690
@MikeJackson690 2 года назад
It's not so much losing the person that hurts, it's the future that you can no longer have together that's worse.
@johnstamos4325
@johnstamos4325 2 года назад
Once you see her true form, the future shouldn't matter. But once you learn F-nature and accept it for what it is, life gets so much better!!!
@MikeJackson690
@MikeJackson690 2 года назад
@@johnstamos4325 Her true form was that she had an eye on one of my "best friends" for who knows how long. Still, I could've had a family with her (I didn't want to at the time) and now I'm left pining with no one to make one with, and time just seems to be disappearing. I messed up 😔
@liakh.2539
@liakh.2539 Год назад
It all comes down to expectation. We aren’t mad that they left, we’re mad because we didn’t think they would. It’s brilliant. Everything that brings us suffering stems from our expectation. All it takes to get over it is switching you perspective. Reframe the meaning of the action to something positive or neutral and it doesn’t hurt anymore, at least not in the way it did.
@alexconfidence2354
@alexconfidence2354 Год назад
@@MikeJackson690 people who have kids with people and got married are still left, so there is no antidote or guarantee for her not leaving other than true love. But if she eyed your friend and left you for him, then you have no business being with such person as a partner. Just be open, focused and patient you will get someone that deserves you and worths you especially if you are a good person. I wouldn't want to be with someone who left me for my best friend.
@zgsfreaky9102
@zgsfreaky9102 Год назад
@@alexconfidence2354 What do you mean “ such a person “. Is a girl in the wrong for choosing whoever she feels more righteous being together with? Maybe at first she liked the guy but then ended up falling in love with his friend, I don’t think that makes her a bad person, just the way the universe plays it out p
@Raj-ts8lw
@Raj-ts8lw 2 года назад
The only thing you're attached to till your death are your own thoughts, soul and the body. Work on them the most.
@-VAJRA-
@-VAJRA- 2 года назад
Ekdum sahi gyaan choda Bhai
@philipoconnor2236
@philipoconnor2236 2 года назад
Wise words. Will the soul remain though after death?
@ryandtheguys1781
@ryandtheguys1781 2 года назад
How?
@Raj-ts8lw
@Raj-ts8lw 2 года назад
@@philipoconnor2236 According to Hinduism, it does. That means you gotta work the most on that. Keeping the soul pure.
@ph3619
@ph3619 2 года назад
There is no soul. It's an invention of the narcissistic monkey brain
@gravityclarity
@gravityclarity Год назад
You can be attached to someone, but not let it consume you. Be ok with being by yourself. It's ok to feel sad when you lose someone you love. But don't let it destroy you.
@janewildly
@janewildly Год назад
This is rough for me having left a 6-yr long relationship. You have to sit still with the pain & let it go. Easy to say, but hard to do. Sometimes the hard part is letting go of the pain, because it felt like if you do let go, you’re losing all of the shared memories. It’s sad.
@TimonPumbaTv
@TimonPumbaTv Год назад
I just broke up 2 days ago days brother. It's always a tough road, but we'll come out stronger out of the other end.
@darksidecoops
@darksidecoops Год назад
Yea a 7 yrs guys we in this together
@kadenlalani381
@kadenlalani381 Год назад
Letting go of the pain is one of the hardest steps
@Dontstressbenchpress
@Dontstressbenchpress Год назад
I totallly understand how you feel. I’m a year post break up and its still rough to let go.
@PurryFriends
@PurryFriends Год назад
I am of the same situation with you and the pain is suffocating. But we can do this. Eventually, we’ll get through this. 🫂
@felicityduijkersloot6043
@felicityduijkersloot6043 2 года назад
Real love is letting people go ❤️ just be grateful for the time together
@bitofwizdomb7266
@bitofwizdomb7266 2 года назад
So then what’s your definition of love ? Just letting people go ? 🤔
@felicityduijkersloot6043
@felicityduijkersloot6043 2 года назад
Love to me is a very sweet selfless light-hearted playful emotion.. Love to me is childlike.. And relationships should be loose and that someone can be 100 percent who they want. And if that means that someone doesn't want to be with me anymore then I accept that choice and I still love them at a distance.. When you realize that everything in life is constantly moving and that you never have any grip on anything or anyone, life is going to be so much easier.. Just my thought 🤷🏼‍♀️
@bitofwizdomb7266
@bitofwizdomb7266 2 года назад
@@felicityduijkersloot6043 but what if someone wants to have an open relationship but doesn’t want to leave bc he loves you. He just wants a different flavor every now and then . If you love him just as much as he loves you , would you stay even tho it makes him happy to sleep around ?
@purpleviolet9046
@purpleviolet9046 2 года назад
@@felicityduijkersloot6043 Great perspective!
@readinggeorgeeliot1489
@readinggeorgeeliot1489 2 года назад
@@bitofwizdomb7266 Any relationships required open communications. Why couldn't an open relationship work out? The couple set the rules and tones of the relationship so if one person want to explore a little more and the other person respect that urge so both communicate and continued to communicate about the new dynamic until they can come to an understanding. The communications open space for both to speak their thoughts and fear and emotions without judgement, whether it's good or bad. Once a conclusion has been reached and both decide to open their relationship with the continued open communications, who can say it won't work out?
@zek7353
@zek7353 2 года назад
I lost my best friend 6 months before losing my mother, that's a few years after losing my father. The idea they are now returned brings me some comfort, I appreciate this upload.
@derdrittepenner
@derdrittepenner 2 года назад
Einzelgänger, or the guy behind this channel, is a very wise traveler. Always come back for some calming thoughts, eye and mind opening anecdotes and words. Much love and energy to you my man! Whatever happens, happens. 🚬
@vincentdimitri169
@vincentdimitri169 2 года назад
Hang in there, I lost my mother back in 2010 to cancer when I was 19, my dad was never the same again and lost his mind, except he wasn't "crazy enough" to be admitted to an institution, but rejected a therapist as well. From November of 2021 until March of this year, I lost him to covid, my grandma to natural causes, a friend to a drug overdose as well as another friend to a rare, aggressive form of arterial cancer. Among all this, I had to stop seeing the girl that I loved dearly. I was losing my mind for a few weeks and was crying every day, but I'm ok now 3 months later. I've lost 25kg and now training for a marathon as well as changing careers. Things get better, they always do. I wish you the best!
@noo2le868
@noo2le868 2 года назад
@@vincentdimitri169 amazing the resilience you showed trough this years 👏👏
@NickNicometi
@NickNicometi 2 года назад
@@vincentdimitri169 No. Tough times DO last, and sometimes one hasn't the time or chance for things to turn around. You are young and you have time. Life can get better, eventually, and relative to WHAT? I went through very similar circumstances the past few years, and I can say, having lived through that and looking at the world, that if I had God's skill-set, I'd be a MUCH better god! Of course, a true stoic wouldn't believe in God, right? Life's a real piece of shit, so stop sugarcoating it - it's just then a sugarcoated turd. I live in Buffalo. Share your BS with a mass shooting victim's family and let's see how well that is received, oh Swami! Maybe I'm too much of a realist/cynic to truly be a stoic, because I can't help but give a fuck.
@NickNicometi
@NickNicometi 2 года назад
@@noo2le868 I got the young man beat, having lived through that and more, and I can say life is a turd, no matter how you sugarcoat it.
@jules2419
@jules2419 Год назад
My favorite saying is “I have yet to meet all the people who love ❤️ me!” Makes me appreciate those who were in my life and look forward to those to come.
@user-eo4lz8oe7q
@user-eo4lz8oe7q 3 месяца назад
@humairafroz5616
@humairafroz5616 9 месяцев назад
One thing which has helped me to get over losses and difficult times and to the time still help is a quote by Haruki Murakami. The quote goes like this "Such wounds to the heart will probably never heal. But we cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever". Hope this relieves you too.
@kritisingh4575
@kritisingh4575 5 месяцев назад
Nice ❤
@ceecee2952
@ceecee2952 5 месяцев назад
From which book is it?
@marlene9505
@marlene9505 Месяц назад
Reminds me of one of my dad’s quotes: “A ship may be safe when it’s in harbor but that’s not what ships are built for…"
@DamienZshadow
@DamienZshadow 2 года назад
Yoda had the best stoic life advice I have ever heard. "Let go of all that you fear to lose."
@DamienZshadow
@DamienZshadow Год назад
@@john-paulhunt6943 Afb?
@joannasekua6273
@joannasekua6273 Год назад
stupid advice. I fear of losing a place to sleep, so I'm supposed to let it go and become homeless?
@DamienZshadow
@DamienZshadow Год назад
@@joannasekua6273 Let it go from your mind. You don't have to be homeless or even not have a family to let go of all of them ahead of time in your mind. I've already let go of everyone I love so when they pass it will be of no consequence. I've let go of all the possessions and items I have in my life including the house over my head so if it ever burned to the ground I would simply get up and move on. You cannot control the circumstances of your life so stop holding on to them so tightly. They are out of your control and they are impermanent. Detachment is true peace.
@Braxton-xk5bi
@Braxton-xk5bi Месяц назад
Yeah kina like if I fake it I don't have it
@Braxton-xk5bi
@Braxton-xk5bi Месяц назад
​@@joannasekua6273yes now get started 😂
@noseefood1943
@noseefood1943 2 года назад
Desire = attachment = control = suffering
@ScarFaceDom_
@ScarFaceDom_ Год назад
💔
@aanishaggarwal3001
@aanishaggarwal3001 Год назад
I am sorry for your loss. May god be with you. Somebody will love you dear, be hopeful.
@sadhna7865
@sadhna7865 Год назад
=life
@RaviSingh-tk9ut
@RaviSingh-tk9ut Год назад
Desire = attachment = fear of losing = trying to control = suffering
@TKUA11
@TKUA11 11 месяцев назад
Realizing how you contributed In the losing= realizing that you ain't shit=replaying that over and over=not fixing things=thinking about what they think of my family and life choices=feel even more shitty=cry when nobody is looking=do it over again while getting no job car or freedom to be a normal functioning adult in the world so you die and resurrect into the house
@LydiaLegault
@LydiaLegault Год назад
A dear friend sent me this before we stopped talking. Letting go is so hard. Emotions are so strong. There is peace however in accepting that they were never ''yours'' to begin with. I rewatch this whenever I find myself sad/depressed again that our friendship ended. 😔 It takes alot of strength to let go of attachment. ''Grieve moderately''
@shama7201
@shama7201 Год назад
Why did u let them go? They sent u this which means they might have expected you to put some efforts to be back
@LydiaLegault
@LydiaLegault Год назад
@@shama7201 I tried.. they ghosted me. 😔
@TrangNguyen-hx3ko
@TrangNguyen-hx3ko Год назад
I don't understand how friendships end. It's not like a romantic relationship where people can't be with each other any more?
@aheenobarbushenocied9880
@aheenobarbushenocied9880 Год назад
@@TrangNguyen-hx3ko Personally, I just left without saying a word- my relationship with my (only) two, longest lasting friends had turned into something that made me more angry, annoyed and infuriated on a regular basis compared to feeling fulfilled, happy, worthwhile. I suffered and suffered and realized that the situation isn't going to get easier- it's only getting worse. It got to the point that where just even seeing their name pop up in a message, call, or a simple greeting made me shift from completely calm, at peace with myself, to instantly angry. So I left. I took a long, rational look at the situation and realized that I've been covering all these negative emotions for a LONG time with the idea of "friendship", not even realizing how harmful these emotions were to my well being. Once I realized this, I took up a metaphorical blade, and swiftly, without any hesitation, cut everything that tied me to them. In practice, I started immediately practicing zero contact. After that- my overall well being has immensely improved. My anxiety is lower, I'm eating better, I've managed to quit Alcohol altogether (that's freaking big for me.), my head is clearer, I find immense enjoyment in things again that were mundane and boring before, and most of all, I feel so much more at peace while sticking to my own motions. Sorry for the long comment, think I needed to write this out even once, for the record.
@user-vt9kd4no8j
@user-vt9kd4no8j Год назад
Thanks
@skyehami423
@skyehami423 Год назад
“If they can’t even feel your presence what makes you think they’ll acknowledge your absence ” this quote hit really deep for me but it allowed me to replay the memories we had together and really ask myself if they were even in tune with what was being said. And sometimes it makes me realize that they probably didn’t care so much at the end hence why should I let it bother me as when you think about it, it probably never bothered them
@SonicVerza
@SonicVerza Год назад
I love that quote my goodness. Thank you random RU-vid woman.
@EL-ee4cz
@EL-ee4cz 10 месяцев назад
It's 323 in the morning. This random RU-vid clip and your comment hit home. Thanks.
@valvihk3649
@valvihk3649 10 месяцев назад
That's a thought provoking message since I was psychically connected to my loved one o.o no wonder I was so attached
@nedodarom944
@nedodarom944 9 месяцев назад
The quote that i need😭
@Candence.Candance
@Candence.Candance 8 месяцев назад
@@EL-ee4czlol same except it’s 12:29 in the morning 😅
@isleofmist
@isleofmist Год назад
The problem is, if you don’t attach you are not fully allowing life to unfold either. It’s something between attachment and detachment that we need. If we weren’t attached to anything, we wouldn’t have the drive to do anything in life, we wouldn’t have deep relationships, we wouldn’t be connected, and we wouldn’t feel responsible for others - which we are. Being so limited in our consciousness is a dilemma…
@mariekuijkenhistoricallyaw2598
@mariekuijkenhistoricallyaw2598 9 месяцев назад
true!! it's a dance. It's about balance and change. Accept both sides of the coin when you live them.
@robertxtreme237
@robertxtreme237 8 месяцев назад
Its a matter of choice.
@harshitraj8844
@harshitraj8844 7 месяцев назад
It's the matter of accepting the reality means everything good and bad all , everything exists in whole
@uliseszzu5279
@uliseszzu5279 6 месяцев назад
Como decía Buda Gautama el camino es el medio, una cuerda de la guitarra suena en el punto medio
@Braxton-xk5bi
@Braxton-xk5bi Месяц назад
This translates to damned if you do and damned if you don't 😂
@kryzs_kornhell
@kryzs_kornhell 2 года назад
Right now I'm sitting at the death bed, holding the hand of the person who saved me from dying and raised me. I'm waiting for her last breath to come. And I can't find comfort in this video. I will get through the pain, but it will take years. I was caring for her for many years now. I'm just exhausted and deeply disturbed. Please wish me luck
@user-tu8ti6sr1r
@user-tu8ti6sr1r 2 года назад
May God grant you ease
@Awaregirl
@Awaregirl 2 года назад
Peace to your beloved and yourself 🙏💚
@anudeepshetty2751
@anudeepshetty2751 2 года назад
What happened Kryzs?
@kryzs_kornhell
@kryzs_kornhell 2 года назад
@@anudeepshetty2751 She's just very old, in constant pain, has dementia, won't eat, won't drink. It's that deep connection between us, which makes it hard for her (and me) to leave her life. She's struggling to let loose. But now it's getting better. She's on her way to fall asleep and never wake up again. Still unbearable pain for me. I stay with her all the time since Tuesday.
@anudeepshetty2751
@anudeepshetty2751 2 года назад
@@kryzs_kornhell I can relate to it man, it's unbearable. I still haven't recovered from the pain. I wish you good energy.
@g-dcomplex1609
@g-dcomplex1609 9 месяцев назад
in any relationship, when the bad outweighs the good, it's time to let it go, the initial action can be gut wrenching to put one self through, but shortly after you return to new beginnings
@creatorofpizza
@creatorofpizza 9 месяцев назад
On a positive note, never be upset someone you love left your life. It opens a door for a new potential lover. That chapter of your life is over and another has been openedn❤
@julianofmadagascar
@julianofmadagascar 7 месяцев назад
So they say but it just works this way in the romcon
@rickywilliams2096
@rickywilliams2096 2 года назад
2:40 I think it's about balance. Understanding that even though you enjoy this persons presence, they could leave any moment and you understand that and continue go about life with joy
@tylerasmith52
@tylerasmith52 2 года назад
yea, it should spark you to be more FULLY PRESENT when you are with them, knowing they could die tomorrow. That is what I take away, never take someone for granted because they could be gone. I learned that the hard way...
@springgal265
@springgal265 2 года назад
They may dump u after some time.
@springgal265
@springgal265 Год назад
U wont feel happy if ur friend suddenly dump u.
@Pinky2424
@Pinky2424 Год назад
Wow! That’s so true.
@DihkFace_Mcghee
@DihkFace_Mcghee Год назад
Balance IS, the way!
@Peter_Parker69
@Peter_Parker69 2 года назад
Your crush is a flower that should be enjoyed where it grows. If you pick it up and try to own it, the process of decay begins.
@bryann9689
@bryann9689 2 года назад
Well said
@cassbc123
@cassbc123 Год назад
~Osho
@rosie6
@rosie6 5 месяцев назад
Dman
@kittykat632
@kittykat632 Год назад
I had no idea I was a stoic someone once ask me if I even had/felt emotions. I answered... yes, I just do not let them control me I control them. I don't allow myself to get too emotionally attached to anything.
@talyalong1526
@talyalong1526 Год назад
You cannot lose what was not yours in the first place. Only mourn the loss of those who truly belonged to you here in this place. If you are the type to get attached (and I am) you must always remember to let go so they can continue on their adventures in this life or the next and even if it means leaving you behind. ❤️
@danielolufunbi1775
@danielolufunbi1775 Год назад
Thank you for this , she just left me and I feel so terrible about it ,I was obsessed with her . I was too attached
@leccionesdevida.podcast
@leccionesdevida.podcast Год назад
thank you darling
@stupidhoe909
@stupidhoe909 Год назад
She left me 😭 changed everything and moved
@TheDoomerGoGetter
@TheDoomerGoGetter 2 года назад
I've struggled in the past with getting too attached to people to the point in 2018 I got diagnosed with BPD. Whenever I lose someone either from death or end of a relationship/friendship etc... I fall apart, this is something I'm learning how to control and hopefully while I'm in the process of learning I can help others who deal with similar things through my RU-vid channel, making relatable videos discussing my struggles and what I did to overcome them, were all in this together, we gotta get pass the illusion we're facing these problems alone
@randomsoul9970
@randomsoul9970 2 года назад
Same here
@lorenzozinna4700
@lorenzozinna4700 2 года назад
Good luck to you all, I have a brother with bpd and I know how hard it could be living with it
@macktheripper7454
@macktheripper7454 2 года назад
Daily writing and running will help
@steelpulsing
@steelpulsing 2 года назад
We have the same story Brother, hang in there youre not alone!
@diegocf6919
@diegocf6919 2 года назад
Im sure you will learn to deal with this kind of problems. It's something we all try to learn on a daily basis
@Aalpine001
@Aalpine001 2 года назад
The Stoics, for example, argue that one should never despair. Cicero - one of my favorite thinkers of all time - wrote that a good Stoic, to whom a child has died, should repeat: "I have always been conscious that I have brought a mortal being into existence." It was extremely interesting for me to read his letters from the period when his daughter died. Just before this tragic event, he had written a typical letter in the spirit of stoic consolation to a friend who had lost a child. But when his own daughter died, Cicero was absolutely devastated. To his friend Atticus he repeated endlessly: "I am not able to do simple things." Atticus said: "It doesn't suit, it doesn't come off, you shouldn't dwell on it like that," and Cicero at one point replied: "It is not only that I am unable to cope with my daily tasks, I am also unable to think as I should."
@khayahbrookes
@khayahbrookes 2 года назад
That's one of the most beautiful parables I've ever read. Thank you.
@naturesfinest2408
@naturesfinest2408 2 года назад
Perhaps i missed something. But that means that cicero realized he cant be stoic? What was his response to this?
@JDog2656
@JDog2656 2 года назад
I'm not sure I understand the last part.
@gargoyliangaming6556
@gargoyliangaming6556 2 года назад
@@naturesfinest2408 yes from the info given it would seem so. He couldn't practice what he preached.
@diskajuliaekaputri
@diskajuliaekaputri Год назад
Thank you. I will definetly read his works.
@beach182
@beach182 Год назад
This video saved me when I needed it the most. To remember I can’t depend on external factors for my own happiness and well-being. Attachments are the root of all suffering. Buddha was right. To be able to accept and let go. This is not your life to control, you are only here to experience it. Be gentle with yourself, be graceful with the hardships. I know it’s not easy, life can be hard, and that’s okay. We are all in this together. This perspective makes it much more beautiful while allowing the negative thoughts to have a much less intense effect on our minds and hearts. Be grateful for every experience in your life, good and bad. One day before you die, you will realize it was all meaningless in the end, but the love you felt is what mattered the most. There are no winners or losers, because we will all be dead eventually. Break free from the shackles of your limiting beliefs. Realize this world is bigger than what you can understand or conceptualize. Don’t take it all so seriously; remember it’s all a play,a dream. Smile and learn to take it gently and lightly. Make your heart strong and resilient to emotional volatility, and trust that it can never be taken personally, because you as a person, are an illusion.
@joannasekua6273
@joannasekua6273 Год назад
It's a nightmare, not a dream
@beach182
@beach182 Год назад
@DJ Surferdude Your identification with your personality is an illusion. It’s a phenomenon called ego. It’s a result of perception of separateness . There is no external reality other than the internal reality. (I know that can be a bit confusing) As long as you think there is a God or some force outside of you, separate from you, you will be in an eternal conflict with it. Realize there are no lines, it’s all imaginary. Why do you have consciousness and sentience to experience all these things? Logic tells us that nature/universe evolved this way. Paradox’s and mysteries are not meant to be solved, but lived. Do yourself a favor and come to terms with this first. Reality is not what you think it is, it all depends on what software you’re running. Matrix , unplug, reload.
@maggielee1564
@maggielee1564 5 месяцев назад
thank you for ur perspective, it means a lot to me as im going through a tough attachment crisis╭๐_๐╮
@AmandaabnamA
@AmandaabnamA 4 месяца назад
Life has meaning. We are not meant to detach, but to feel both joy and pain and grow.
@boninherlate20s
@boninherlate20s Год назад
I've had one of yet another breakups a few days ago and been so depressed with no one and nothing to cling on to, this video soothes a lot, thanks so much!
@NWOALERT
@NWOALERT Год назад
You are not alone ❤
@annietang5945
@annietang5945 4 месяца назад
Update??
@boninherlate20s
@boninherlate20s 4 месяца назад
@@annietang5945 can't be at a better place, I healed and met someone too, thanks for asking, wish you a fulfilled new year ahead!!!
@sithsabalisekhokosani1779
@sithsabalisekhokosani1779 2 года назад
"From the streets did she emerge, and to the streets she will return. And I say unto you, she is for the streets. So be not weary, when she must return from whence she came.” - Epictetus
@ivancurielvaz5912
@ivancurielvaz5912 2 года назад
☠️
@shaxxnel
@shaxxnel 2 года назад
Sir🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@feslegend
@feslegend 2 года назад
✍🏻✍🏻✍🏻✍🏻
@Alvun416
@Alvun416 2 года назад
This is how I'm feeling about someone right now LOL
@MrG__2
@MrG__2 2 года назад
BARS
@law_9840
@law_9840 2 года назад
This. I've always found Anakin's story similar to mine. I was so worried about not losing the person I loved, that I eventually lost her. Many things happened, and what I remember of that period is frustration, anger, revenge and while all this led to nothing but to an immense consumption of energy, depression began to come out, along with suicidal thoughts. Damn, I remember how everything looked black, empty, hopeless and ALL this because of the loss of a person. Attachment is really something dangerous, I strongly advise everyone to learn to detach yourselves from everything you fear losing. Thank you for all the job you do.
@keerthivasanmanu
@keerthivasanmanu 2 года назад
Hope you are doing good
@cloudyday1617
@cloudyday1617 Год назад
I hope you have healed. No need to hold resentment against that person for walking out. It happened to me too after an almost 30-year relationship! No need to wish that person well, no need to curse. Treat it as a chapter in your life book, and your story hasn't ended! You'll meet new persons as you continue to live your life! If you do not believe, just look at the population % in your country! New friendships & relationships will come your way, just love yourself and treat yourself best! Remember: when flowers bloom, the butterflies naturally come! 🌻🦋🌻🦋🌻🦋
@malagatravel
@malagatravel Год назад
@@cloudyday1617 well that's the point : you will meet new people as you continue to live, so him too!! He will also be meeting new people and that's what really sucks actually 😁😣😅😒
@Lone_Star86
@Lone_Star86 Год назад
Same bro x
@EmergencyAutismHologram
@EmergencyAutismHologram Год назад
"I've always found Anakin's story similar to mine." Me: *Whispering out of sheer dread* "The younglings!!!!"
@joeykoo3779
@joeykoo3779 Год назад
I am trying to practice this, but being someone diagnosed with BPD and having abandonment issues stemming from my childhood, it is so, so hard. I am already unloved and rejected by my own parents, and now I have to live a whole life accepting that I may be unloved and rejected by all. But I still know that this is the healthiest mindset one ought to have. Please wish me luck, yall.
@vernicelli
@vernicelli 8 месяцев назад
I relate to this so much…
@introspectiveamateursalser987
@introspectiveamateursalser987 8 месяцев назад
I feel this to my core.
@DaxVerus
@DaxVerus Год назад
Currently going through a breakup, my first one, where I cannot seem to stop myself from having regrets over my choice. I miss what I had, and while I could have worked through it with them and hoped for a better relationship, there was enough of a feeling that I made the call, whether the right one or not, and now the pain to work through it is immense but needed. This made me realize what I am going through is normal, and it feels good to want to hurt, knowing at some point I will hurt less.
@caa9ify
@caa9ify Год назад
I just got broken up with someone for the same reason. He was my first love and and he always told me that we would grown old together, have kids and all that. We had problems that I thought were fixable but he didn’t, he told me that he still loved me and respected me and said he was going to miss me. I don’t understand why he let me go if he claimed that he cared and loved me that much. Since you’re on the other end of this kind of situation, why did you end it?
@DaxVerus
@DaxVerus Год назад
@caa9ify there was a bug disconnect between us. We had emotional support with each other but with time I learned that our definitions of love were very different, it caused tension, and eventually started to feel too platonic. All the same emotions and care and feelings remained but the compatibility did not. So while it hurt to leave and while I wanted to find every reason to stay it was unfair to both of us to do so. They deserved someone on the same wavelength of love and I deserve someone whom understands and can handle my form of love as well. Neither of us are at fault, neither toxic, I hope one day to rekindle a truly string friendship because we obviously care for each other but we are right emotions but wrong people situation. It's actually a good thing, it means we are both good people, it means we never meant to hurt each other, it means if things went truly bad for me I know they would be there even if it hurt us for a moment. It is harder to grasp though because it's not toxic, it's not the normal reason to leave someone. I did not give up on us, I gave up on myself. I ignored my true feelings because I enjoyed their company and we had a strong connection even though deep down I knew we just weren't the right people for each other. I hope this helps. Don't beat yourself up, I don't think you've done anything wrong, and don't feel they don't care. I bet they care more deeply than you imagine but love is not enough sometimes and that's okay. It's healthy, it's how we grow and learn :) Hope this helped. I can talk further about my experience if you're curious
@plantmama7442
@plantmama7442 2 года назад
Coming to the realization I have to let them go… it hurts so bad but staying with someone who doesn’t love you the way you deserve hurts more… I’m going to miss them so much and right now am inconsolable. But the pain gets better with time… I’ve had my fair share of heartbreak and it gets a little easier every time, but it still hurts. Your videos are always right on time and helped me in the early stages of dating them, but as your Wu Wei video taught me I have to let them go… Thank you.
@NiyaRahel
@NiyaRahel Год назад
Going through the same situation.. I hope you are in a happy place right now
@aprilrains3163
@aprilrains3163 Год назад
How are you now? This is exactly what I'm going through now
@marining
@marining Год назад
@@aprilrains3163 What about you? I’m going through a similar thing and I wonder when I’m not gonna think of them
@aprilrains3163
@aprilrains3163 Год назад
@@marining you do.. but in olas... In waves... Each wave softens even the toughest edges. Trust that forcing that door to stay open will not allow you to turn around and see the right one open to the path you should be on.i can't tell you how much energy I poured into the wrong person. I journaled. I walked. I cried. I distracted myself with TV and animals and slowly I realized I went a whole evening without the thoughts. Then a week went by and it had been days. Now.. I cannot explain the glow in me. It is my own energy. And no more vampire to drink it dry
@preetgill5881
@preetgill5881 Год назад
Going through same
@kumaSOevl
@kumaSOevl 2 года назад
“They didn’t leave you on read. You left them speechless” - future. 💌
@azmeecruz1080
@azmeecruz1080 2 года назад
Thank you so much for this
@kumaSOevl
@kumaSOevl 2 года назад
@@azmeecruz1080 my pleasure. Cheers mate
@dermicoregano5193
@dermicoregano5193 2 года назад
peace brother
@miss420mj
@miss420mj Год назад
I needed this 🥰 Thank You!!
@Chryztallic
@Chryztallic Год назад
Sensational
@darknebula5555
@darknebula5555 Год назад
I was in love deeply and foolishly once, at first when we broke up I was so attached, he moved abroad a couple of months later (this was almost 6 years ago). It took me almost 3 years to come to terms with the fact that even tho I loved him I couldnt do more than just letting him go. I still think about him a lot, I do know now that I was too selfish at first and love isnt supposed to be selfish at all, I realized what love truly is, now just the thought of him being safe somewhere makes me happy, even if I dont see him again I accept it all, my feelings and his. The truth is, there is nothing wrong with love (or feelings in general) but trying for example to force other people to remain in our lifes is like trying to contain water on the palm of our hands: just pointless. Just let them go.
@alexconfidence2354
@alexconfidence2354 Год назад
Let him go and do not bother about him again. You are no longer responsible for his wellbeing, safety or feelings. Yes sometimes you may remember him and we all do remember our ex, but just brave up and move on with your life especially if the break up was not by you. Gather your self and be courageous enough to move on, that's life. Do not give a hoot about him and whether he is well and where he is, he should be fine there.
@FriendofDorothy
@FriendofDorothy Год назад
@@alexconfidence2354 she hardly sounds like the type to "not give a hoot about him". Nor does the Stoic philosophy seem to be encouraging such a cavalier attitude toward those we lose. I believe it says "grieve in moderation" and move on. She appears to be doing just that.
@Jennifahh
@Jennifahh Год назад
@@FriendofDorothy she is conforming. Still loving him but accepts fate.. .I don't understand this behavior.
@Chaosqueenngami
@Chaosqueenngami Год назад
It’s like keeping in mind that while you are the hero of your story, your not the hero in every one else’s. You can’t write the people around you in and out of your life to move your plot forward. Everyone is writing their own story and sometimes it doesn’t include you.
@timharrington4470
@timharrington4470 2 года назад
It seems to me that this video is about the other side of letting go of attachment, it becomes an easier process to work with by shifting one's perspective through realizing that one never owned a relationship to begin with. What a beautiful point
@bluelamp8183
@bluelamp8183 2 года назад
⬆ This
@TheMSRXD
@TheMSRXD 2 года назад
You're channel is really helping me during this breakup process, thank you so much for your content.
@TheDepiano
@TheDepiano Год назад
Hey, how are you doing now?
@deanvo503
@deanvo503 Год назад
@Mateus I know it's gard, how are You ti this day?
@TheMSRXD
@TheMSRXD Год назад
@@deanvo503 Still hard, but we've gotta keep moving, the past is the past.
@uros4925
@uros4925 Год назад
@@TheMSRXD Yeah man, I had a tough breakup a few weeks ago myself, that had a few weeks of no contact before that, so it was super hard, but finally got to see her and talk and have a closure understanding moment with her and we hugged it out and cheered up ourselves even and all the things, then this whole week now has been so much easier, i cried like a bitch and all that jazz but it's fine, you let that out of your system and spend the impressions of it from the soul, as they say, and then you move on. Fortunately for me, this girl is very cool and understanding and conscious of a lot of things, which is why we had the closure that we had and the understanding. A girl prior to her, it was much much worse, and it was hard on me for a year until i met this one. It's all a process. Just wanted to share this, cheers!
@kpotato2617
@kpotato2617 Год назад
Same here. And with no cloture too! We just stopped talking 2 months ago. The last conversation was normal and all. But it was obvious he lost interest. I didn't mention it to him and he didn't say a world. And that's how we necer spoke again. I think he started dating someone else a month ago. From what our friends told me. Still cry every night but I know itll get better sooner or later
@strawberrysangria1474
@strawberrysangria1474 Год назад
This is what I tell myself when mourning a loss. I would rather say goodbye, than beg them to stay and suffer. Thank you for the time we shared, it was great experiencing life with you.
@joegardner851
@joegardner851 Год назад
I was hanging out with this girl for the past few months. We would hangout every weekend. I told her how I felt and I guess she never felt the same. The past month has been amazing, we did a lot of things together. Probably the best time of my life. Out of nowhere she ended up getting in a relationship. I was hurt. We talked about doing so much together and now we can’t. It sucked but I had to tell her that I can’t be around her anymore. In order for us to happy, I need to let her go. I thought I was being immature and that it wasn’t the best choice. after this watching this video, I feel better
@theknight3093
@theknight3093 5 месяцев назад
You ve been a real one dude! Never ever let someone makes you feel unworthy! What you did show your strenght and your good intentions,you will find someone that will appreciate this kind of respect🙂letting her go was an act of respect to you in the first place but also for her. Good job man🫡 I wish you can get the best girl ever😊
@joegardner851
@joegardner851 5 месяцев назад
@@theknight3093 thank you, for a long time I felt like I was a terrible person. I will admit that I wasn’t the best of friends towards her but I needed to do what’s best for me. I’m not going my to say that I found the one just yet. Me and my friends of five years have been getting closer and closer. We are taking our time and placing realistic goals like marriage. It’s a big commitment, she’s a single mom with 2 teenage daughters. We are doing what best for us and becoming a family
@thechancellor-
@thechancellor- 2 года назад
To the *worthwhile person* seeing this, your dream is not dead. Don’t allow the past and current pains and hurts stop and define you. You’re more than a conqueror. Rise up and put yourself together. Keep pushing your future depends on it. I wish you all the best in life ❤️.
@JohnM...
@JohnM... 2 года назад
You REPEATEDLY POST 'to the WORTHWHILE PERSON....' PLEASE stop this - EVERYONE is worthwhile. Your grammar is excluding people. Do you want EVERYONE to feel valued, or just the 'worthwhile people'??
@SkyePhoenix
@SkyePhoenix Год назад
@@JohnM... I don't think that a person who doesn't see that comment is going to feel excluded or get offended 🤔
@xiolacardoza2588
@xiolacardoza2588 Год назад
Thanks but I'm still not joining the dark side
@catherinephillips8925
@catherinephillips8925 Год назад
As someone who has lost their father sister and child within the space of a few years I understand finding purpose in the face of grief takes huge strength and determination, I see your statement as kindness in the face of adversity.
@nikid3690
@nikid3690 Год назад
That brought tears to my eyes, thank you
@troyhughey4791
@troyhughey4791 2 года назад
I lost someone I loved deeply. Knowing now that no person belongs to us has opened my mind tremendously! Knowing that she has been returned has bought me peace to my heart. Thank you for this upload!
@gargoyliangaming6556
@gargoyliangaming6556 2 года назад
I hope u mean returned to the streets and not back to you. Cause if u allow any woman to leave u and return ur a jackazz an being played a fool. So I really hope u mean she returned to the streets
@thecommonsensecapricorn
@thecommonsensecapricorn Год назад
This is such a hard lesson, but it’s been coming up for me a lot lately. I fear getting into relationships because I don’t want to lose people. I’ve been in one long term relationship and even though I left him (4 years ago) because it wasn’t healthy - I STILL struggle to accept he isn’t in my life anymore. I hate losing people i’m close to, because i don’t get close to many. But I know that it’s part of life… and I know i can’t settle and stay committed to someone if it’s not working anymore, so with that loss will always be apart of my life. I feel like the only people who don’t deal with loss are those who choose security over freedom, even if it means dealing with a lackluster life full of lackluster relationships. but of course tragedies happen too. I need to really focus on non attachment and loosening my grips on those i love.
@louquay
@louquay 10 месяцев назад
I'm in the strange position of feeling anxious over the loss of someone who is not even mine yet (and, according to the sages, never really will be). I appreciate these quick reminders so much
@FreerDHabit
@FreerDHabit 2 года назад
Just lost the Love of my life. This was well timed. Thank you
@HK-et3hk
@HK-et3hk 2 года назад
Be strong, mine has gone in september. Still can't wrap my head around it...
@thisisnotoleg
@thisisnotoleg 2 года назад
Hang in there homies. Focus on yourself, and things will realign in time. Got dumped a few years back, was devastated for some time. During the recovery, ran into a lovely girl in the kitchen at work. It wasn’t time for another relationship, yet we bonded anyway. She is so loving, I’m glad I got out of the previous relationship against my will.
@lindaolsen7828
@lindaolsen7828 2 года назад
I lost my husband in December and recently acknowledged to myself that I wanted back the person in his prime and also the opportunity to fix mistakes I'd made. The fact that he had dementia helped me to this insight and to understand the roots of my grief at loss. I still grieve but I also now know I can't hold on to anything except the ever changing present. I pray that you can reach a place that gives you some comfort in your heart. It's cold comfort but seems to fit our physical reality and aids in moving forward in our evolution.
@ChandanaCTV
@ChandanaCTV 2 года назад
God bless all those who have lost a loved one, may they rest in peace. ❤
@lauritabarajas303
@lauritabarajas303 2 года назад
@@thisisnotoleg thank you for sharing. Was lovely reading. I just lost who I thought was the love of my life a few days ago.
@297banu
@297banu 2 года назад
In my teenage years, I was a hopeless romantic,allbeit very mercurial as well, and had very close relationships with friends, too. Later in life, I realized somehow, I don't get attached to people any more. There are people I love but I don't miss them if I don't see them. When a loved one dies, my grief is over in less than a year and I accept they're gone forever and carry on. I wouldn't recommend this state of mind to anyone. It makes for a very bland,beige sort of life.
@dsoule4902
@dsoule4902 2 года назад
Perhaps it's a natural reaction? We still care, but there is a stone where attachment used to be.
@three-d131
@three-d131 2 года назад
From personal experience, I feel like we still care, we just shift these emotions around in other uses. I personally care for people, but could really care less if we see each other or not. It’s not that I hate them, Iv just learned to accept MY truth in life and live for me, life is a fickle thing and it will always matter what YOU make of it in the end.
@thomasandersen9310
@thomasandersen9310 2 года назад
So you know what not to do, do you have a recommendation on what to do?
@alanismika
@alanismika 2 года назад
I feel the same. I started feeling disconnected from people. Guess it’s not truly acceptance but a backhanded way of making you feel secure before the pain, again there’s still fear of sudden loss. Acceptance should make you want to live your emotions with people freely and fully and even mourn for them without desperate need of having them back, not repressing them
@297banu
@297banu 2 года назад
@@dsoule4902It is like the line in Kipling's well known poem: " If all men count with you, but none too much, " . Idon't know what happened.
@kepspark3362
@kepspark3362 Год назад
"At its core, trying to keep the people we're attached to in our lives is a selfish pursuit. When we desire people to be with us, we generally don't desire this for them, not the bettterment of the common good, but to fulfill our own selfish desire, which is the 'not wanting to part from what we're fond of'"
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat Год назад
Reflection is truly key. Humanity should dare to look deep within, but it should also accept that more than mere physical Reflection is required for true, celestial enlightenment. "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In Time, all points converge; hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the Universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
@Sky-ui5cd
@Sky-ui5cd Год назад
Interesting things I noticed: -not about repression of feelings (rather about your mindset after initial reactions) -regruate+limit mourning. sadness is ok but falling into a prolonged state of depression is not. -entitlement brings pain when they leave your life. realizing that you were never entitled in the first place will help with cope.
@uros4925
@uros4925 Год назад
Yes.
@liyana8556
@liyana8556 2 года назад
we don't move on, we move forward.. this was such an insightful video, thanks for uploading
@haakonthegood17
@haakonthegood17 2 года назад
I’ve had to let people go because if I held onto them it would hold me back/cause more pain, in the long run. People come into our lives for a reason but they also leave for a reason. We usually don’t realize that reason until much later after we’ve had time to ponder about it.
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat Год назад
Reflection is truly key. Humanity should dare to look deep within, but it should also accept that more than mere physical Reflection is required for true, celestial enlightenment. "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In Time, all points converge; hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the Universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
@SkyePhoenix
@SkyePhoenix Год назад
(To me) the reason doesn't really matter.
@ksshe3694
@ksshe3694 Год назад
Can't change a person but can change your mind, your feelings, your number, and address. Saying BYE was the best change ever. SHRUGGING.
@chosenstation
@chosenstation 2 года назад
grieving in moderation. I like this formula for the masses, as for myself, I am capable of the stoic sage route of complete detachment, but to those who have made an impression on me, I will feel and accept that inevitable return, and shed some tears. Happy, I had a chance to know someone before there passing.
@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488
Nonsense
@Awaregirl
@Awaregirl 2 года назад
Love people when you have them; when time recall them back- let go with ease; grace and beauty! Remain grateful! It’s as simple 💜
@mentalityoverall9250
@mentalityoverall9250 2 года назад
For everyone saying this has caused them a bland life is not applying it fully, I used to numb my emotions and live "half dead" then I started doing more activities I truly enjoy & looking and leaning into these feelings that naturally occurred. Life is now the best it has ever been, clear head, in the moment, loving every bit. Don't fight the feelings because of your thoughts about them or stigma's based around them. Ease up and let them in
@dontfrybaconnaked
@dontfrybaconnaked 2 года назад
I gave up some things years ago that were obviously an emotional rollercoaster and I'm much happier with the tranquility that has come from that decision. Recently I have considered giving up some other happy-unhappy cling-repel things that are more difficult to give up. But if it leads to more tranquility as did my earlier decisions then I think it will be worth it.
@maggie0285
@maggie0285 Год назад
Grief is a real emotion though. We have to get to that place of acceptance on our own time. Life is nothing but beginnings and endings. Everything will end. My mom and dad are no longer physically in my presence but they live in my heart and mind.
@Alex-ve3pc
@Alex-ve3pc Год назад
Hope you’re doing alright❤ they live in you, they make up your DNA, if you ever feel alone remember that your parents make up who you are. Your features were once on their physical self, and now they live on with you. As long as you’re alive, they live vicariously with you.
@rosj91
@rosj91 Год назад
I want to thank you guys for coming up with great content on this channel. It has helped me numerous times to balance my emotions and I am finally getting better at holding myself together in painful and stressful situations without suffering too much. Thanks once again for the wonderful work.
@bunnyfrosting1744
@bunnyfrosting1744 2 года назад
I’m trying to heal after my very turbulent, 8 year long HS sweetheart relationship has come to a close, this is much appreciated. It feels odd to love someone so much that you feel almost happy to let them go, but I just mean that out of a place of certainty in making the tough decision to walk away. My life was forever changed because of that love and it’s hard to distract myself from the feeling of absence and regret
@wisteria1739
@wisteria1739 2 года назад
I wish these were the words she said🤧🤧🤧
@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488
Not yet but in ten yrs and hundr3ds of gallons of wine and mountain of kitty litter, then youll realize you through a good man away for greener grass. Only then youll be old. That is your life.
@Iuvkrssy
@Iuvkrssy Год назад
@@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488 please shut up
@lemostjoyousrenegade
@lemostjoyousrenegade Год назад
😂 @ your YT user name! 😂 😂 😂 I LOVE IT! ♥️ Thanks for the laugh!
@sweetlullaby5156
@sweetlullaby5156 2 года назад
I chose not to watch this yesterday but now I'm watching it because my heart is broken. I hope I can accept things as they are and be happy for others.
@piglo318
@piglo318 Год назад
I needed this and all you in the comments are all spiritually awakened. God bless all of you and the creator of this video. If you had to learn on your own let your loved ones learn on their own.
@emmad.176
@emmad.176 Год назад
This was a beautifully put together video and just what I needed. It's amazing how the right videos come at the right time. I have abandonment wounds and am learning when and how to create boundaries, and when to let go, if only for a while. The idea of returning is a much more beautiful or gentle idea.
@kimsherlock8969
@kimsherlock8969 2 года назад
Loss isn't easy to shrug off. The more we love The more we loose. I will love and know there will be pain if I loose them. I don't stop loving them They are my life.
@rollercoaster8881
@rollercoaster8881 Год назад
Exactly. When I had the mindset from The video, I wasn’t enjoying life. Because if At the end I was going to return something, then why bother enjoying it lol
@Toastbr0t1337
@Toastbr0t1337 Год назад
@@rollercoaster8881 yea this mindset isnt for me either. i am just someone that loves my close ones deeply. if the price for making my people feel loved is devastating grief, then i am more than willing to pay for it. thats just how i roll
@etaokha4164
@etaokha4164 2 года назад
When I got pregnant and had my daughter I lost all my friends and that's when I learnt people never last forever especially friends so I learnt to let go and didn't go finding more friends but instead I embrace myself and alone with my daughter. As time past I don't get attached to people I just focus on myself and my kids and be happy 😊
@albertodona8789
@albertodona8789 2 года назад
You are right, friends don't last forever, but that doesn't mean you cannot make new friends when the "old" ones leave you. Since your child probably radically changed your life, it could be that your old friends weren't ready for that big change, and that's normal, but there are many people out who either already have children or are willing to link with people with children. Friends are important, you don't want to become your child best friend, for her own sake
@mrnice7570
@mrnice7570 2 года назад
You need more to your life than just tour children, they grow up and fly the nest , you need a life to return too then.
@One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All
@One-Ring-To-Rule-Them-All 2 года назад
People with children and people without usually don't hang out much together. It is normal. Just find some friends with children through the school or activities you do with your kids...
@Taldaran
@Taldaran 2 года назад
Remember that you will need to return them to the world as well eventually. Too many parents in an effort to keep their children with them will literally arrest their development to subconsciously keep them from growing up.
@trempire7514
@trempire7514 2 года назад
I also lost all of my friends and keep going strong!
@denzelsugayan432
@denzelsugayan432 Год назад
i really needed to hear this.. after breaking up with my boyfriend, it felt like a part of me still wants to live through my life like he's still here with me, but its making me loose myself. finally i have the courage to let him go completely and slowly get back into being myself, ready to love again, but with lessons i learned during my time in our relationship.
@lr8786
@lr8786 2 года назад
Thanks for uploading this. I'm going through a hard time with my husband and could possibly be leading to separation. Letting go sounds better than losing. I always told him we were better off as friends. He tell me I forced him into marrying me. I think it's for the best in the long run that we go our separate way no matter how much we loved each other.
@alexconfidence2354
@alexconfidence2354 Год назад
If you guys love each other enough you would not break up, but for him to say he was forced into marrying you is one of the most insensitive, unloving and cruel thing to say. You can only try your best but if it doesn't work you can't force anyone atleast you tried. but never cite love here because obviously the love is not balanced or doesn't really exist especially from his comment.
@lemostjoyousrenegade
@lemostjoyousrenegade Год назад
🎯
@priyasharmax
@priyasharmax 2 года назад
This is something I am going through currently, and there is no other way then letting go. It becomes tough sometimes, and most of times it feels as if I haven't made any progress. But enduring pain is the only option and to hope that things will get better because what I have realized over years is that our brain start accepting things over time.
@MoMo-qy1vx
@MoMo-qy1vx 2 года назад
You'll get through it Priya. People tend to say that time heals, but I've learned that time only heals once we accept our situation and the conditions we must endure. Accepting the fact its difficult to let go, accepting the feeling of no progress, accepting the struggle of growing and expanding beyond the boundaries of our previous shell. More importantly, that it's okay to experience it and feel discomfort as we do. And yet choosing to move forward anyway. Learning to accept and empathize with ourselves is a moment where we cant resist and hide from our pain. Our emotions can be sporadic, so the challenge our acceptance has to face varies on a day to day basis, so stay patient with yourself Priya. Progress is equally microscopic as it is perceived on macro scale, and sometimes we just have to repeat a routine of thoughts or small decisions (that are not our normal) long enough for it to change the behaviour of our mind in the long run, and its not instantly noticable. I remember hearing that progress is just an accumulation of small choices that bring changes in the most subtle ways, until theres so many changes that its not subtle anymore. I wish you the best Priya, I believe in you :) Stay patient with yourself as you heal and release
@priyasharmax
@priyasharmax 2 года назад
@@MoMo-qy1vx thankyou for this. :)
@gabrielgarcia7554
@gabrielgarcia7554 2 года назад
@Priya Being self aware of the problem is still progress. Anything worthwhile takes time, practice, and discipline. No progress is completely linear, patience with yourself has to be central with your journey. During this time you will learn a lot about life and about yourself, you will be so grateful for having to go through this journey as time goes on because it will only increase your resilience and emotional strength. The pain is not optional, it is necessary for us to move forward, even though it is hard and it hurts so much. The suffering is optional, and I don’t believe you have chosen suffering, so I am very proud of you. Time will march forward, and things will not get better unless you put in the effort. From what I can see, it appears that you are doing that. Be patient, kind and loving towards yourself. It is the most important principles to keep on this journey. Best of luck. 🙏
@priyasharmax
@priyasharmax 2 года назад
@@gabrielgarcia7554 Hi.. thankyou for this beautiful comment. I am so grateful to read this. Yes, the journey is tough and perhaps this is what I needed to read today. There is guilt, frustration and what not. But your words put things in to perspective again. Every time I feel low, I somehow get such comforting words from kind strangers like you. People I've in real life are never so kind. I am so grateful that human being like you exist. Thanks a lot stranger. You really made my day. Wishing you a nice day. :)
@johnhickersantilan4295
@johnhickersantilan4295 Год назад
Glad I found this video especially right now I'm having a big problem with my life and also my significant other left me without any closure for almost 13yrs of our relationship its not hard to forget
@lemonadeslices
@lemonadeslices Год назад
this is an excellent video. i've recently lost a ton of friends, so this is strangely comforting, and gave me the perspective i'd needed. thank you.
@Raj-ts8lw
@Raj-ts8lw 2 года назад
This video changed my perspective towards loss of loved ones, breakups. Thank you.
@TheAlanxx1
@TheAlanxx1 2 года назад
I have been a long time follower of this channel, it helped me countless of times, but this video now more than ever. I literally just had to say goodbye yesterday to my closest peers forever and this video popped up at the perfect timing to understand why I truly coulnd't let them go. I am genuinely grateful of the content you share and the philosophy you preach.
@Logan24855
@Logan24855 Год назад
Einzelganger, this is a thing I've struggled with....attachment. This video you narrated helped me better come to terms and understand better why as humans we attach and just really let go, especially if it doesn't serve you. This helped me a lot, thank you.
@hearthappyvibes391
@hearthappyvibes391 2 года назад
You create your reality. What you dominantly focus on expands in your life. Think positive and live in the present moment!!!!
@Bhodisatvas
@Bhodisatvas 2 года назад
Some get to the point where love turns to hate and they still can't let the person go, that is really crazy thinking.
@naitemercy3422
@naitemercy3422 Год назад
I've been there.
@marte1376
@marte1376 Год назад
It's the pain to forgive yourself to love that person, the delusion and cruel reality. I've been there too and takes courage to move away and be in peace with whoever triggers you
@alexconfidence2354
@alexconfidence2354 Год назад
It's because both love and hate are in same frequency and at extreme poles of the spectrum, it only takes self control and sometimes a brutal reprimand or pep talk to make you control your emotions. Self worth is also a reason not to bother much.
@icantpee_myass244
@icantpee_myass244 Год назад
Been there and done that; It takes almost everything from you at first but as time goes on, the pain lessens and blurry things becomes more and more clearer, that's where you slowly start to accept every pain and every feelings you feel and you eventually move on. I'm still healing this day even 3 years almost 4 years has passed.
@heathernks8
@heathernks8 2 года назад
These videos have been so timely lately! Thank you for all of your hard work!!🌻🎋♥️
@lilbin378
@lilbin378 2 года назад
“Train yourself to let go of all you fear to lose” - master yoda
@gasmith7486
@gasmith7486 8 месяцев назад
This is EXCELLENT!! Thank you so much. I help a lot of broken people and this helps me explain why it’s self sabotaging to cause ourselves emotional distress over the loss of another human being.
@domingosnhamussua3070
@domingosnhamussua3070 2 года назад
Honestly, Einzelganger has become my netflix . I love this channel
@shashankn4523
@shashankn4523 2 года назад
These contents are so beautiful.. it is helping me a lot in real life too and many ppl who are going through rough time.. thanks for your contribution to help ppl like us brother.. means a lot it gives us so much hope and confidence... Wishing good luck to everyone 😊
@miguelgonzalez6213
@miguelgonzalez6213 Год назад
I think this lesson is most important when it comes to family. Not those we choose, but those we are born into. There are times in life when we feel we must accept all they do, because of the blood ties, but its more important to be true to ourselves, even if it means cutting ties to people you've known your entire life. To me, that's the ultimate test of stoicism and discipline. Being able to let go of family when they begin to act like anchors and not supporting and lifting you higher.
@beneficialfrequencies8907
@beneficialfrequencies8907 Год назад
To truley love is to allow the person be free. Free to leave if they must. The love we feel for them is actually the love we have for ourself projected onto them as a reflection. This reflection beams back to us and we feel love. It's all us. When we realise that there is a counterfeit version of love, a Synthetic copy we realise that to truley love is to learn to love ourselves with wild abandon. This is true love.
@vinskra
@vinskra 2 года назад
This broke my heart and then made it full. Thank you.
@judahriggins8403
@judahriggins8403 2 года назад
I had this friend who i was afraid to “lose”. I’ve suffered many losses on my life to the point where I developed a pretty big fear of loss. This fear skewed my views of everything and cause me to move in fear. Long story short me and that friends aren’t friends anymore. Good thing is they said they don’t hate me, they just need time. I feel like a fool. Like Anakin
@judahriggins8403
@judahriggins8403 2 года назад
Update for anyone who cares. Me and that person are friends again. Learn from your mistakes
@SkyePhoenix
@SkyePhoenix Год назад
@@judahriggins8403 Good to hear. I'm happy for you.
@lizryan6289
@lizryan6289 5 месяцев назад
My "friend" needed my services. Then the betrayal came. I am smarter now and I have a hedge around my heart.
@cherokeegypsymama
@cherokeegypsymama Год назад
I definitely needed to hear these wise words. Peace and love to all who are watching!
@idklmfaooo
@idklmfaooo 5 месяцев назад
I just returned one of the deepest loves that I had, and I was (and still am) suffering and mourning. But this perspective gave me some respite and a different lens to view the break up - thank you for posting this, and also the comments are resonating deeply.
@raul-of1oh
@raul-of1oh 5 месяцев назад
Same, only person i ever cared about. My biggest dream right now is for her to come back but it s very saddening that most likely that dream won t come to reality
@ForeverTensed
@ForeverTensed 2 года назад
Hey Einzelganger! Thank you very much for all these videos, for making philosophy so understandable. I wish you were my friend who I could meet every evening.
@ReynaSingh
@ReynaSingh 2 года назад
The world would be a different place if it adopted the stoic view of possessions
@JaysonT1
@JaysonT1 2 года назад
Hi Reyna! ✋️😄
@alexconfidence2354
@alexconfidence2354 Год назад
I think balance is the watch word as stoic can be a double edged sword. Narcissist can claim to exert stoicism, even those who hurt others and never care can claim same. Human relates to the word humanity, humane and emotion. Even animals exhibit some level of emotions, if we base on stoic alone we will be nothing but vile heartless beasts with no feeling or empathy all we need is balance.
@benjaminmarkmann2332
@benjaminmarkmann2332 Год назад
I lost the bigger part of my family one year ago from today. I didn’t realise it at first. I was having a sleepless night with discomfort and feelings of sadness, out of place, non tangible and unreasonable feelings, like an echo of old and suppressed emotions. I couldn’t understand. Then I came to this realisation, that the timing was just right. The rain started to pour. It was a year ago today. It was a long time ago since I last felt that bad. Nothing could ease the pain. When everything else failed to stop me from weeping I opened up my phone, started up RU-vid and this video was the first recommendation. I watched it and It helped. I feel better and I learned something of deep value that will continue to give me peace, until I’m returned.. I’m not one to comment about my life anywhere online but this.. the impact is immense and I want to return my gratitude same-fold some how. The only way I could think of was to share. So thank you. And for you that have lost someone and are struggling with grief right now, know that it gets easier.
@5greenfeathers
@5greenfeathers Месяц назад
I’ve been watching and listening to all these stoic vids . Sooo much wisdom ! Thank you ! But this single video has the most important advice I’ll probably find anywhere . I thank you for such wonderful content ! Thank you !
@Amy-lg4uv
@Amy-lg4uv 2 года назад
Moderate passion and reason to find a balance point that we can survire. Mourning is necessary, but we shall not let grief destroy us. Thanks for this video. ❤️
@drevildruid
@drevildruid 2 года назад
One often meets their destiny on the road to avoid it.--Master Oogway, Kung Fu Panda
@catherinehamer5653
@catherinehamer5653 2 года назад
The wisdom of Kung Fu Panda! My two daughters used to watch this film on DVD when they were young….they are now leading their own lives elsewhere but the DVD still sits on the shelf collecting dust! I let my girls go (as they must) but not their DVD collection……do I count as a True Stoic?
@amiragabani3896
@amiragabani3896 Год назад
Beautiful work, thank you Einzelgänger!
@adityamanna3932
@adityamanna3932 2 месяца назад
Thanks bro cause whenever I feel low you offer a very positive and realistic prospective on things based of practical philosophy
@LimewirePirate
@LimewirePirate 2 года назад
I moved around a lot and lost my great-grandmother, to whom I was very close, as a kid so I came to terms with letting people go early in life. Sometimes, I feel heartless for not expecting anything to last but that's life.
@MixUpTheVideos
@MixUpTheVideos Год назад
Nothing lasts. Everything changes. It's just a matter of when and how. Your understanding is realistic. And it can help you to practice gratitude, now.
@shanti888
@shanti888 10 месяцев назад
Wise
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