Brit Reacts to | You Know You're Dating a SWEDISH Man When... 

As a Swedish woman... I can only say that I love the equality we have in our society and definitely prefer things to be split evenly between people, no matter if they are men or women. I absolutely buy my own gifts. I make my own money, know exactly the stuff I want, and don't have to wait around for someone else to maybe perhaps one day get it for me. Of course, small thoughtful gifts or surprises are fun and a nice way to show appreciation, but gifts should never be demanded or expected. (Unless you're a kid. Or don't make any money of your own for whatever reason. )

A bit exaggerated, but pretty true. They forgot about that we avoid our neighbors, don't talk to strangers, never sit next to other people in public traffic. Not directly related to dating but still

As a Swedish woman, the texting is definitely true, I actually hate texting but I hate talking in the phone even more, I think texting with someone is so stiff. I prefer meeting them.

Yeh so, Its mostly true. They overdo it a little bit and generalize ofcourse. But its mostly true. It CAN be really awkward to meet a Swede without being drunk, we might be a little hard to talk to. But when we find a conversation we both like, we can talk forever. There is nothing fake about it, thats the good part imo. Both girls and boys ask eachother out. Since there is that equality theres nothing really stoping both sexes.

In general this is quite accurate. And it is true that Sweden is a land of equality. But, speaking as a Swedish woman who is married with 2 kids, sometimes it would be nice to get surprised with a small gift or gesture from my hubby. Not have to buy what I want for myself almost all of the time… And from what I’ve heard this is quite common. In general I’d say Swedish women are more generous and better at showing appreciation to ones partner than Swedish men. But hey, this is just my experience and opinion. Hopefully other women feel different. 😉

Swedish man here. I don't go to clubs or pubs a lot these days, and it might be a generational thing to some extent, but much as I wish it wasn't, the first thing about meeting in bars is kind of accurate in my experience. These are all generalizations and stereotypes to some extent, but it is common enough to be kind of valid. Maybe it is a bit different these days with dating apps and whatnot, when I was in my early twenties they weren't as common. Online dating was a thing, but the whole swiping and texting people wasn't I believe. This was roughly 15 years ago. The texting thing - Eh... kind of - I'd rate this as mostly accurate. Very individual thing, but this kind of universal western idea of not coming of as desperate and clingy applies. Which makes people who develop feelings for the person they have a "Friend with benefits" relationship with pretty hilarious to me, but that's another story. The awkwardness.. Highly individual - I'm almost an overly social and talkative person (as you can probably to tell from this frickin novel of a comment I'm currently writing). Since we as a society are fairly private and a bit stand-off ish when dealing with strangers this can sometimes bleed over into dating. Mostly accurate depiction there. I disagree with the last bit about sober hangouts being an awkward affair though. We do have an expression that translated goes something like this: "Sure, you can have fun without alcohol and getting drunk - but why risk it?" That hardly applies when you're dating though, especially after you've been at it for a while. Many people hardly need an excuse to drink, but I wouldn't want to be plastered if I'm spending time with someone I'm trying to form a romantic relationship with. Maybe I'm the one not following the norm - who knows. Sex isn't taboo - correct. "Kind of like a game of tennis" - eeeeeehm.. I mean sure. For some. Casual sex isn't a big deal for most. Not my thing, but we're trying to generalize here. My preferences aside I wouldn't automatically assume that I would be staying over for the night at her place, never mind that we'd be having sex if all she did was to invite me over for dinner. Grand gestures and gifts - Again, very individual, but off the top of my head I can't remember all that many of my guy friends doing stuff like that. To be fair I don't think they would tell their friends about it, but if it was common I think I would know. I like doing stuff like that myself, not because it is to be expected on her part but because I want to. Maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned I guess. Equality in house-chores - Yup. Among younger people this tends to be the case for the most part. Some couples decide on splitting them in an equal way on a semi-permanent basis and others just do their best to make sure it's as fair as possible. Be that cleaning, taking care of garbage and recycling, cooking, dishes, and any other household-related everyday activities. And if kids eventually become part of the equation - taking care of them with all that entails. Aaaaah the sternly worded letter. Yup. A classic. I've experienced people banging on my door (I was innocent in one case) on two occasions though. Yes - For some reason we absolutely bloody love pickled and salted herring and it has a place reserved on the table for pretty much every single major holiday. Doesn't matter the time of year. I'm not the biggest fan of a lot of the varieties of it myself - particularly not Surströmming - but I don't want to offend so I tend to eat some at least.

Sure there are a bunch of men that are shy and reserved when they are sober, but I have allso came across alot of men that are not shy at all. But yeah most swedes are introverts, but there are some extroverts too. I am one of them😄

Hi from the heart of Sweden. I went into this thinking oh yeah they are gonna say stuff i will laugh at but the longer I watched the more I thought hm... yeah thats soo true... how can they be so accurate... have they watched my dating history?

Rest of the world: alcohol kills people! Sweden: But how many are born because of it?

About 95% correct. 😂

I don't know, I have always met my boyfriends through some common interest/hobby, something to share, then it has never felt akward, but yes, I have always taken the first step, Swedish men can be pretty shy.

I'm a Gen X, from a tiny town (10 000 people, 2 small high schools) 1,5 hr from Stockholm. When I grew up we had ONE pub/nightclub, no online dating, and dating in Sweden didn't exist. This is how you "dated", for real. You went to the pub, met the guy you secretly fancied for weeks, and hooked up for the night. Then you usually don't talk to or see him until next weekend, when you have sex after the pub again. This goes on for quite some time and if you enjoy each other's company THEN you change phone numbers and meet up at a pre-party somewhere. It could take months before you actually met up sober in the daytime. 😂 I found this vid, although a bit exaggerated, funny and very true.

The video is very over-the-top, but if you’re experiencing sober hang-outs to be awkward affairs consistently its probably on your end. Dude’s literally just chilling, could add more to the conversation, be more engaged, but she also just seem to feel awkward about silence and small talk generally.

I might be wrong about this assumption, but if you NEED to do an activity when going on a date I suspect that person might not be that great at holding a conversation or handling sitting in silence and just enjoying each others company.

Im not gonna lie, the video was very accurate. Ofc there’s always people that stray from the norm but generally it’s a lot like that.

Partly true but of course exaggerated, but the equality standpoint is right, at least among younger generations. I suggest "Young Royals" as a start for watching a show, season one and two are only six episodes each and season three is on the way. Wilmon rocks!

so I would say the bar thing is kinda true but I think it's kinda split 50/50 on whether the guy makes the first move. But, if a girl makes the first "move" it's generally a special look or something to make the man know she's interested. While it's true that swedes turn more social when we've started drinking generally people are pretty social at bars etc because that's a place where talking to strangers is accepted. The relationship/texting thing is tbh wrong in a way. Because what I've experienced and generally hear is that women are the ones who reply where it's hard to continue the conversation. But, I think this is more about how interested people are in each other because usually the ones who are interested are really easy to have convos with and I can catch myself not doing much for convos when not interested. and how fast people are into relationships is totally dependent on the person some are really fast some are slow.

I´m Swedish and 58 years. I´ve only dated twice in my life. (got married at 22 and divorced at 40 ).

at the "Fika" he's having a normal swedish conversation.. we dont talk mutch (im not speaking for everyone but most sweds over 30 i've met) btw SHE is awesome, i can see her in a movie! I did once told the people in the downstairs apartment that i whould rip them a new one if the woke my son up (he was like 2-3 month old) they said they were sorry and turned the music down :) most of the time if you ask a swed nicely they will comply without making a fus.

I just Googled "arga lappar" (angry notes) and the images are hilarious! Swedes take their arga lappar very seriously!

I almost shat myself lauging many years ago. I person in Oslo stapled a note ON THE DOOR!!! Next time you have sex, be more quiet.. Wish it was me but it was not

Most things feels pretty accurate, I can't say too much about the alchohol part since I don't drink but I've still heard about it before.

Very true.

OMG this is so accurate. LMAO

This is maby the way a self-righteous bimbo from the "states" who just got of the plane might experience it, sure parts of this is true. -get to know one person and they'll most of the time let you into the pack and make sure that everyone feel relaxed, its mostly a dominoes effect. After a little while, once you get a hang of it, most swedes will act differently even on first meeting you, there's key to be found;) ♡

14:42 It is not European, but it is quite Northern European.

It is accurate and generally correct, but of course it is generalised. If one didn’t generalise nothing could ever be said about national characteristics because there are always some that are different. The only thing I think is not correct is that Swedish women tend to approach men first, it think it is about equal there. But for an American that expects the man to almost always take the first step Swedish women are a lot more active and Swedish men a lot more passive than expected.

I mean I think it can be like this sometimes, because americans can't handle any type of silence and see the silence as it being ankward while swedes don't find a bit of silence here and there being something strange or ankward. So while the guy thinks its nice to just talk a bit relaxed, enjoy the coffee and enjoying the moment I think she thinks its getting ankward the moment the talk goes a bit slower or stops. As a swede I think we are usually very social when we meet someone for a fika. But its not uncommon at all for it to maybe be a bit silent here and there between talking and we dont see it as strange or uncomfortable at all.

9:03 is so not true. Lots of swedish people make conversations with stangers often. Like if someone needs help with something like going on a bus or stuff then they help and always make a small or long conversation before leaving.

Swedish men is soo slow in dateing but not when they want to sleep with you. They don't take lead , don't ask you out because they don't want to pay. They demand to be the only one you date but they think it's okay to date alot of women. If you don't sleep at first date it's hard to find a date. They want everything from a relationship but not be in a relationship. Texting is one way texting. Asking questing and respond from the answer etc is not common.

lol this is so true

As a swedish man I'm glad to be an exception in much cases :p

Actually hahaha.. true about norway as well. We call Swedes brothers. we are so similar its funny on this

I am a women in a small town in sweden, and here we always say hi to everyone we meet but if the people start to speak more than hi i will feel like run the fastes you can away it is not okay to think to speak long conversations only besauce i say hi, but if I see the same one many times i can start speak more and more and soon one day i do not see that one as a stranger any more, and I will speak more and more opend and that is for both women and men, and if am whith some one i dont like to get presents i buy what I whant when I need it but if I am in a store and see something and do not have the many for it and someone buys it then I will be verry happy and say thanks, but then I have to buy that people something i cant just get something and not give back, and if you go to someones house for the very first time it is costum to bring a gift to the one you go home to,

my personal input here is yes, we are slow and low investment, a bit at least, When I was younger I felt a bit afraid to show if I liked a girl, because I was afraid that IF I would show her, she would know I liked her and then it would be awkward to see each other if she did not like me back, That's what I thought anyway so I was hesitant to try show how I felt to girls. But at some point I said F it and just go with the flow. Alcohol made that thing easier, but nowadays I don't really even drink alcohol at all except if there is small gathering with friends just for socializing and having a good time. I think I'm not alone in how I thought when I was younger, and as we don't really ask people to date here in Sweden it's hard to get past that first barrier sometimes to show that your interested in someone. Side note " I'm not sure how it is now tho, I been away from the meeting girls scene for quite a while as I have a girlfriend for abit over 10 years steady now." Also I hate texting long ass messages, I rather call someone then text. OK edit again, the Coffee thing I usually think about if I would ask for "swedish" coffee I would like it dark/strong. And F no, it's not anywhere near as awkward as this, I would talk my ass off to a girl. IN short, some of the stuff I could agree with, but most are a huge generalization.

Yeah, well. This RU-vid clips is a bit over the top. We can be like that. But they make it seem a lot worse than it is :D You are not that bright if you actually do things like what you react to and if nothing else. Swedish people are generally very smart and logical. There are of course a lot of exceptions. But I believe that will be the case in any country. :D

A Swedish woman here - well, yes, he seems like an ordinar guy from Sweden. Nothing special, just a common nice man.

i'm a swedish woman and often i would say the women take the lead, or atleast show men quite obvious that we want them to come over. hooking up is easy, dating someone is hard. yeah it's about right this video, it's very hard to know if the person you hooked up with or have a thing for is interested back...and if they are interested do they only want sex or more? very often they act uninterested for too long then drunken text you like they want you way too late, and then drop a sweet comment on a rare occassion leaving you all confused. But swedish women are confusing as well, multidating leaves you wondering if they want you around to boost their own ego or are they actually interested? atleast this is for the young people..i haven't dated in many years so my dating scene knowledge is lacking.

They are good actors but I woud say its only about 50% correct :D

No sure who made this video you are reacting to but they must've been hiding under a rock and only ever encountered one man in Sweden before making it. Feels extremely generalised almost on the verge of biased based on the persons own experience xD

As a Swedish man... my non-Swedish wife of almost 15 years (we live in the UK), at one time pointed her finger at me after a few drinks (promise - just a few) and said: "we... we must get married". We'd known each other for several years, but I'd never bothered approaching her because I knew she had a boyfriend. What I didn't know was that she'd broken up with him (otherwise I'd probably just made a fool of myself). The day after, we bought an engagement ring. I had to fall on my knees four times and ask her to marry me because she passed out each time. Each time after she asked me to do it again, and I did, more theatrical each time. On the fourth try, I succeeded, almost reciting Hamlet. We got engaged, and a bit more than a year later we were married. Throughout this, I mostly just said, "oh... ok". However, we weren't strangers to each other. We'd known each other for several years. We share everything equally because that's how we both want it. I treat her, she treats me and so on. More related to the clip - yes, it's unfortunately quite accurate. I often wonder how it can possibly be so many couples in Sweden. I'm quite an introverted person, but even I can put on a smile and say nice things to somebody I appreciate (had far more progress with that since I moved to the UK decades ago though). Since moving to the UK I've gotten accustomed, and indeed learnt, the art of the art of "smalltalk", an intensive, even invasive, random and indeed dangerous form of social activity that can sometimes lead to the unfortunate side effect of acquiring more friends, some of which might even be known as "girlfriends".

I’m inhibited even for a Swede but I think many Swedes are awkward. Conversation is not our forte. And indeed many men are shy before they drink enough to be really stupid. The younger generations can be a little more open and less inhibited though.

Very heavy generalisation exept for some people some Swedes are very talkative and forward, but sure most parts is partly true. The angry letter is very swedish.😊

Patreon as in we could all watch your live together, or more of a request?

Haha. 😂

This is totally how it is. 😅

Yes, most men are passive but there are swedes who are also more active. Yes, yes, yes... Fika, the weather chitchat and all the rest. Swedish coffe is actually very strong compsred to american. Yes, very casual overall. No, really, its spot on. Im not swedish but Ive lived here for 23 years. I do love being equal and selfsufficient. We do get specisl treatment, but then its more genuine than an expectation.

Not all swedes love herring😂 and most people only eat it on easter, christmas and midsummer.

1:50 don't take that advice. If you are to forward you will be shut down hard. 4:39 No, not really. people may precive us as such. We are not that open about sex. 9:03 That is not true. 12:06 A relitionship is abot to show both are invested in the relationship. The man should not do every thing as invete to a resturant the woman should also do that. At home the one that comes home first start doing the dinner or makes the entire dinner. It's equal but also is time effecient. 13:00 fried herring with red onion is so good. 15:03 It's not about fear of confrontation. If there issue you should be able to say it calmly and a note make it easier for people absorbe and to understand the issue.

We swedes kallpratar direct translation it means coldtalk.

I think its a bit a extreme. But i dont know as a swede i havent even been in relation with a swede for my past 23 years only dated and been together with foreigners … Swedish women for me is quite scary due to the fact they like it very equal between the sides- split the bill, doesn’t care to have the door opened for them, dont mind not recieving flowers and so on. I also find them very cold and hard to get going with. Whereas dating foreigners is much easier to read of the situation. Me paying full bill to show my appreciation and so on and all these traditional dating rules.

Noooo, this video is not an accurate description of the general swedish man 🤦🏼‍♀️😅 if it was that would be absolutely horribel 😂 Love ure swedish videos btw! 🫶🏼

As a swedish woman I could even get upset if the man would bye exmepsive things for me. As I could not get my own things myself!! 😂 It would offend me and it have done. Just foreign man does that here actually especially if not married. I been mad at a man wanted give gift. You bye me or what??? I want relation and equality and if I want something I get it myself of course! Same thing with open doors and that kind of things. Just make you mad. Beacuse it is like you could not do it your self! And this is what the swedish men is used to.😂😂

Its very exaggerated and more reflect to date an introvert guy I guess. Because at bar you find all kinds of men and women there. Women in general have experience of the guy who send text all the time. Swedes can be like that I guess, but plenty of Swedish men are actually bad at texting or calling. Or at least according to their wife or girlfriend. Plenty of swedes like to take it slow sure, but plenty take it quite fast too. You can find people who moved together and plans to marry offer a couple of weeks to a months dating, to a year or two of dating before moving in together. You also find plenty of swedes who only looking for one nights stands too. Plenty looking for a serious relationship. Several do both while still single and looking When it comes to first date, yeah no suprize it be over a "fika". However plenty go to a restaurant or do an activity on the first date. Swedish men dont act as they can sleep over unless they are invited over for it. Its more about the type of man she found I guess, but it would seem creepy here too. Its more of a type of man who expect that. Sex is not seen as an activity like tennis. Its not as a taboo thing I guess than in America. And even if it is a taboo thing in america, I bet they having as much or as little as iin Sweden. We tend to not think its vergin or sex before marriage is a holy thing to uphold unless the individual swede is that religious or an incel I guess. However a ton of Swedish girls are not interested sex on the first date or second, unless she actually was look for that instead of partner. And you will find tons of different guys who goes from accepting that and want to have it slow to guys who looking for only One Night Stand. Swedes are no exception to this. Swedish men and women tend to uphold traditional gender rilolls even tho we are a very gender equal society. However, like many other places, men in general have trouble picking up the clues and hints from women. Men and women in Sweden tend to take up traditional gender rolls in the home. Swedish men can help with the cooking, cleaning etc. But a ton of Swedish men are like typical men too. Plenty of swedes dislike " surströming" but because foriners and some swedes dont know hot to open it, its a big joke on Sweden. But when a swedes likes it or have someone close who likes it, he then knows how to open it correctly, by open it underwater. The smell is way less bad then. Then its not eaten as is, but together with other stuff. Sure swedes tend not to like conflict nor confrontations. But fights between neighbors happens too. Often just verbal fights but fists or just throwing shit over the fence or call the cops on each other can happen too. Hose the angry note thong is even a meme in Sweden because we are more passive aggressive then open aggressive in conflicts. But not unheard of an angry neighbor knocking on your door to complain too. This felt more like a combination of what people have heard about Sweden and outlines of swedish behavior together with an introverted guy. However it is true Swedish dating culture is not the same as American, which wouldn't be a surprise. But its not that different either. I would take this vid as a comedy scetch.

All the points, ALL OF THEM, are "true" to a degree. Many of them are exaggerated a bit, but overall all have some truth to them. Example, ofc women get some special treatment, and can get fancy gifts, ofc sex isnt like a tennis game, but compared to how women can get special treatment in the states, with men paying for a full day date with lots of plans, resturant and stuff, or expect monthly present sometimes / showered in gifts, or how sex can sometimes be viewed as something "holy" then it's gonna feel like this compared. The american dating thing just doesn't exist, you just don't go out on DATES, you go out for coffee, or to grab a bite and hang meanwhile, get to know eachother, less preassure, and most likely you'll have to pay for your self. And the 3 date rule before sex just doesn't exist either, from my experience talking with friends, Sex on the first real hangout (after a coffee for 30 minutes) usually leads to sex, and that REAL hangout can often be right after the coffee if you both felt it really clicked right way. The coffee is like the first small chit chat for 20-50 min to see if you even can connect a little bit before you start talking about going home together or to a resturant, OR split.

Nah special treatmant as a woman is pretty rare here atleast in my experience. I wish both men and women could be more romantic with eachother. I don't think romance should be the sacrifice we made to reach equality..you can still show your partner or someone you like that you like them with compliments, gestures or gifts. Swedes are def bad at this overall in my opinion. But then again, if you are too forward and get very romantic in an initial dating faze...i would dip out, that would be creepy. many swedish men are good at doing housework, either you have a manly man who does alot of work outside and constantly builds something for your house, OR you get someone that's a great cook, cleans and does laundry.. BUT in this new generation men are usually more equal...but you also have a gathering of manbabies that i like to call them, many men just expects to be served by their computor and don't really lift a finger at home despite beliving they are equal...and that's from knowing many many men in relationships. don't get me wrong though, i still feel swedish men are more equal than men from many other countries.

Swedes generally are about the long term. Not rushing things. And the nuclear family mentality is strong here.

Exaturated? Yes. But basicly true.

I remember a guy saying he never whent to bed with an uggly girl but he woke up with alot I told him don't drick so much booze

It's kinda accurate but also really not, it feels like she made a list of typically swedish things and then took them to a comical point of ridiculousness

I think this is mostly correct but a bit a bit exaggerated. But in general sure.

Well its sometimes true but they are exaggerating it a lot.

One thing about Sweden that can get missed is that. We have no clue about what the US is about when it comes to diversity and or race things. We do not care. You do you. That how I belive we feel here. We just don't give a shit, because we only care about if you are nice or not. When it comes to movies. Give us good movies and if you turn the movies in to something that is not just a good movie. Well then we wont watch them forward, because we want good movies toss in whatever race or anything you want. Just don't make the movie about your problems.

Thats why its so nice to go to other countries. There the men give you some attention 😂

there are a few things being correct, but most of it is exaggerated

Not much that is true in my world.

Well it's "true"... but a little overreacted...or how too put it. The sex part true, its like a normal thing. This not gift thing. well yeah, but its not like the men wouln't buy gift, its more like a example of not that we we women doing going take for granted that the man mosgt buy us something. We swedesh women, iven if we like to get gift, or get taken out for dinner. we don't take its has normal. we work, can pay for us self and such. Just like the men can buy us gift, we can buy the men a gift. ord we has mone maybe pey for dinner some timer, or we split the bill.. and so on.

naaahhh this is about 50/50 so not accurate at all

Sorry to say. But this is cause she’s foreign he’s insecure and doesn’t know how to act.