Get Better at Conversations: Do This One Thing Now 

That awkward moment when you are watching this on a cellphone….

"Put the damn. phone. away." *Standing Applause and Cheering*

Watching content like this is a far cry from scrolling through FB and Twitter etc..All day. The internet can be used in an educational or edifying way if used judiciously. Too much of almost anything is not good. Education being the exception.

Try leaving it home and see how that makes you feel. You will notice you are addicted to it.

This is incredibly important and vital information. My quality of life,especially connection with others, is suffering due to this. Thank -you!!!!!

It's amazing how you can put two and two together just by reading the comments! I didn't even watch the video but I'm assuming he says put your phone away to be more present in the interaction 📵🙇🏻‍♂

All great points, but in addition to inappropriate eye contact, I would also add other facial expressions that can be considered weird or awkward.

I completely agree. But let's reverse it. How do I have conversations with people who Won't put their phone down? I see this at work and in relationships. People use it as a crutch now and it's nearly impossible to deal with. I have confronted friends about it, but that's counterintuitive to having better conversations, lol. Found your channel recently and I love it. I'm an elem. teacher and your content has amazing value. TY!

Yes! You said it! Put away your phone . Prioritize your people, your conversations in person are way better....and modeling respect, courtesy and interest reinforces relationships with grandchildren, coworkers, ...everyone!

Most of my life has been pre-cellphone. My family always worked crosswords or read BOOKS during most meals. Kind of the same thing.

Thank you sir

Thank you thank you for your wisdom . We as a couple going to put down phone more and spend quality time with each other.❤️😊

Great channel 👏

The one thing, he says, is put away your phone. I don't have this problem: I used to carry a phone back in the days when it weighed 18 pounds and came in an over-the-shoulder bag. I was selling auto parts, and carrying the phone was part of the work. Phones were standard for plumbers and emergency surgeons, too, back then -- and we all felt sorry for one another, recognizing that we were all trapped with this damn thing because of our work. I'm not in sales any more -- so I don't need to be enslaved by my phone. Good. I leave it on the charger at home. Check for messages every now and then. It strikes me as odd that people carry phones around with them when they don't need to.

Thank you very much!

Some feed back from the digital generation. Actually grabbing a phone in the middle of the conversation is a passive aggressive way to : 1. Show a disrespect to you or what you are saying. 2. To push your borders, to see how much disrespect you can take. It’s almost the same thing as rolling eyes and to say “aghr “. And than covering it with : “I just don’t know how to make a conversation” is the final kick to show they won you. Means they managed to show the disrespect to you and get away with it. If you sincerely buy it, it’s a signal to a young person they can manipulate you whatever they wish. That’s what you, parents don’t understand. It’s not iPhones that interrupt it, and it’s not out addictive habit, it’s YOU, unwilling to see in order not to solve the problem that has been growing for years while ignored: it’s the way to show disrespect to what you say or to you. Means it’s you, failing to reach your child that has learned LONG TIME AGO that they get away with disrespecting you as long as we cover it with some kind of “flaw” or “addiction” or “being upset with the lack of attention from you”(works the best).

“The mere presence of the phone can be distracting.” I think this is true. Based on my experience of praying: when praying you are in deep concentration so it is easily noticeable when you get distracted. If my phone is in my peripheral vision while praying, I notice that I will automatically glance at it or think about it while praying. My hypothesis for why this happens is because we repeatedly have experiences of turning to our phone, picking it up and engaging with it throughout the day. Hence we develop a kind of instinct to attend to it and engage with it

Lots of parents raised in single parent families who are too busy as well as inexperienced in social skills in order to pass on the skill.

Time is our most valuable resource so interaction and conversation is not of high quality when when a cell phone interrupts and diverts attention because it leaves you feeling like you are not worth 100 percent of the other party’s focus?

Several of my poor quality friends tend to engage more with their phones in conversation than they do with me. They will even go so far as trying to insist on showing me videos, conversations, and pictures on their phone- all as if it's very important, which to them it may be. One in particular was so bad he was actually stepping over my bed to hold his device to the window in an attempt to get a better signal. When I implied he might put his phone down for a while, he said I was being rude by telling him what he shouldn't do. Why is it so difficult to find decent people?

Sort of like how when a tv is on in any situation people are prone to look at it more than anything else.

The problem I have when I say the wrong thing is the people I say this to get what I feel is EXTREME ANGER!

If ever you need reminding just how much iPhones ruin social skills and relationships just watch the behaviour of the mother with an iPhone in one hand, feeding her child with the other 😔. If you are conversing with someone who has a phone out on the table it can also be a subliminal message telling you ‘ I’m listening for now but at any time this conversation might be downgraded’. I am in my early 60’s and thank goodness I learned my (not perfect) social skills well before mobile phones took over our lives. I have an iPhone but if I ever need to use it, it needs charging. It’s just not an important part of my life.

Good, very good suggestions! I'll watch all yr videos. But! I cannot find your name??? I'll keep trying. Thank you!

speaking of invading personal space (as you were in last video I saw), do you suppose you could back up about 6" or so? Thanks.

What is sad in my experience is that when someone has their phone on the table the tendency to just look to see if a banner came up is so prevalent and automatic. I always try to keep my phone in my bag as to not be tempted but most of my friends feel they can’t as they don’t feel like they need to be reached at all times. We forget these are for our convenience not necessarily for other people’s convenience.

I'm really disappointed that the cell phone is the topic. So, what is #2, because I am not rude enough to pull out a cell phone during a conversation...but I think it is possible that I am guilty of the second reason that my conversation could be better.

Holy shut, this dude just stretched “Put your phone down” Into like 10 minutes long.

...and then it actually happens that the phone rings. And immediately the caller totally takes over the conversation. And leaves the other conversationpartners with a feeling that they, apparently, are less important.

What exactly are you trying to tell me? ❤️

The title wasn't clickbait

Hi Bruce I have one complaint about your podcasts, where were you 50 years ago. Most boys were abandoned in the 60s after a parents divorce when they lived with there mom and your information would have been helpful. I lived with my Mom and rarely saw my Dad and felt uncomfortable asking for help from anyone and my 2 year-old older brother was no help either. My Mom never picked up a book to help me or never had me read a newspaper with her or no help with math but she was an expert in her social scene and the local yacht club. Later I had counseling with a fat female counselor who was yawning during our session and wanted $80 and I never went back.

how does this have so few views?

I'm actually a good conversationalist, probably because, I don't have to put my Smart phone away, because I don't have one. I have had people tell me that I'm quite engaging in a conversation. That's because I have practiced face to face conversation and I'm not a slave to my I-Phone. I think one of women's best friends, is there I-phone! Many times I've asked women if they could live without there I-Phone? Many said, I could if I wanted to, but I don't want to. Sounds like a woman.