How To Discipline A Child With Oppositional Defiant Disorder

Nicholeen Peck - Teaching Self Government

Подписаться 55 тыс.

Просмотров 77 тыс.

50% 1

Each child is unique, and some have trouble following instructions more than others. How do we help a child with Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)? I have some great tips for you based on my experience fostering children with ODD and it will surely help you. Stay tuned!
Watch and Enjoy!
Nicholeen Peck
Teaching Self-Government
Key Moments in this Episode
========================
00:00 Intro
00:32 Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)
01:28 Self-Government
02:21 4 Basic Skills
03:26 Power Struggles
04:50 Consistency
06:00 What's next?
Resources
========================
Get our toolkit here:
teachselfgov.com/toolkit
Learn more about us here:
teachingselfgovernment.com/about
Check out our upcoming events here:
teachingselfgovernment.com/ev...
Like us on Facebook!
/ teachingselfgovernment
Follow us on Twitter!
/ teachingselfgov
About Nicholeen Peck
========================
Despite your best efforts at raising children, is your family dysfunctional? Do your children set the rules and have control of your home instead of you? Are you looking for parenting skills that will help you create a united, happy family?
Then meet Nicholeen Peck, one of the world’s most effective parenting experts. Whether you want to fix child behavioral issues, create more unity in the home, or simply strengthen your family relationships, her proven system - Teaching Self-Government - can help you turn chaos into calm.
"People are starving for help to save their families," says Nicholeen.
Since 1999, her seminars, workshops, one-on-one training sessions, parenting videos and books have helped thousands of families worldwide regain peace, be happy and maintain unity in their home. The secret? Learning how to use effective family systems based on parenting that’s deliberate and pro-active (instead of reactive). It all starts with the principles of self-government. If you’re a family of faith, you’ll especially love how your faith and values can be woven into her parenting system.
In 2009, Nicholeen and her husband starred in the BBC reality TV show, “The World’s Strictest Parents” (watch here: bit.do/StrictestParents). She became an overnight sensation by turning around two out-of-control teenagers from England after just one week - without shouting, threats or manipulation. Her amazing success comes from the positive parenting techniques of using calmness, effective communication and principles of self-government.
Nicholeen Peck’s Accomplishments
========================
* Author of “Parenting: A House United,” “Popular Parenting Methods: Are They Really Working?,” “Roles: The Secret to Family, Business, and Social Success” and many other books and magazine articles.
* President of The Worldwide Organization for Women (WOW).
* Nicholeen regularly speaks at the United Nations and other congresses around the world as an advocate for strengthening families and motherhood.
* In 2009 her family was featured on the BBC reality show, “The World’s Strictest Parents.
* Trained as a foster parent for Utah Youth Village.
* Has parented many troubled foster children.
* Successfully raised (and raising) four children of her own.
Testimonials
========================
“Her loving parenting techniques work with ALL children.”
Kristi, www.thankfulme.blogspot.com
“Thank you for your insights and solutions. They have helped my family so much.”
Michelle
“My husband and I have started implementing some of your techniques, and our house has been so different!”
Julianne
“I feel that my children respect me more. I will be eternally grateful for what I have learned from Nicholeen Peck.”
Michelle Baker
“If you want to forge the strongest family bonds possible, to repair damaged relationships, and redeem a child that seems completely lost, then this program IS for you.”
Sandra
========================
Video by Nate Woodbury
BeTheHeroStudios.com
/ natewoodbury
#TeachingSelfGovernment
#Homeschool
#Family

Опубликовано:

16 май 2024

Ссылка:

Скачать:

Готовим ссылку...

Добавить в:

Мой плейлист

Посмотреть позже

Комментарии : 188

@TeachingSelfGovernment 3 года назад

How to Calm Down a Temper Tantrum - ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Q7xtdQ0ikdc.html

@joliem Год назад

Yea..all that sounds great and I have done all of this AND consistently as well as the ADHD..behavioral skills for ...I is different when you are the actual mother who provides love and emotional support. They feel like they can fight back like a hellicat What makes it worse is that there is no father to back me up ..which makes a big difference... it's pure he'll in my home..my other child is miserable

@missmary3337 11 месяцев назад

This 1000% this

@katieresendez6257 10 месяцев назад

I get it 😢

@SanctifiedLady 10 месяцев назад

They’re angry because they feel abandoned by their father so they take it out on the only ones they can or have to do so. They don’t know how to say they need more love and more one on one time. My son hated me because I picked his father. He wished he hadn’t been born. Counseling from 3-17yo. He was the only child and hated my having to work to provide and not having both parents involved in his sports.

@af547 10 месяцев назад

I feel your pain

@af547 10 месяцев назад

I am going through the same thing 😢

@dsprings8565 2 месяца назад

Diagnosed as a kid. Almost 40 now. Can tell u when things got serious, the adults or authority figure who talked to me as an equal and kinda explained consequences of my actions really helped me and those were the only ones i respected back enough to listen to.

@TeachingSelfGovernment Месяц назад

I love that! Thanks for sharing!

@beverlystandforth5616 2 года назад

Emotional exhaustion is such a good expression.

@lindayusof2107 11 месяцев назад

My eldest son is currently facing this issue, but he is getting better now. I started noticing him having ODD symptoms early 2022. He did a lot of things in school which had annoyed friends, teachers and principle. And other parents started to complaint due to his behaviour towards their kids. He never listen, loves to argue, , he always want to win, always annoys others, easily annoyed by others and environment, frequent temper tantrums, and many more. He hated school, teachers, friends, everything about school. And everyday was a nightmare , waking him up for school was a real struggle, never without tears.😢 School asked me to take him for therapy after series of events involving him with other kids, teachers, unable to listen to orders and giving disturbance during classes. I was lost, kept asking why this thing happens, and what went wrong. Until there was this incident where he had caused injury to one of his teacher. And when the teacher asked him to say sorry, he kept himself silent. And when the teacher calmly said, "If you love your mother, then ask for forgiveness" . Nothing happened. He acted like nothing happened and I was shocked since it happened right before my eyes. Didn't he love me?? That seemed like a red signal to me. At home later that day, I asked him whether he loves me, and he said NO😭😭😭 with the look in the eyes full of revenge and hatred.😭 I prayed to Allah to show me the solution in Dec 2022 last year during my pilgrimage to Mekah. After listening to Dr's recommendations , sharings and comments from social medias, I changed my way of advising him. No more hanger, no more rattan, no more raising voice to him, always hug him, listen to him and makes him feel important. Always ask how was his day at school, etc. On April 2023, his school teacher informed me that they were shocked to see his changes. And of course I feel embarrassed, realizing that I was the one whom triggers this from the very beginning.😢 it wasn't his fault. It was me😢 Now I understand things slowly happened when I started having another baby and he felt neglected. He used to take all the blame even it was his younger brother's misbehaviour and I changed this behaviour as well. No more bias, be it you are older or younger. Has to be fair among sibling. I'm happy now that he sincerely confesses to me that he loves the new me and when I asked him why he recently behaved in school, he answered " I behave because I love you". He hugged me closely. I cried that day the moment I saw him as if I was looking an innocent baby whom I had 8 years ago. My bad, sayang. I am so sorry... 😔 In conclusion, violence never a solution to any misbehaviour/misconduct. Treat our children with love and respect. I have learnt the hard way. I hope others may give it a try too.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 10 месяцев назад

A lot of amazing self-analysis here! Thank you for sharing your experience of a change of heart.

@SanctifiedLady 10 месяцев назад

I hate the emojis on serious comments…it makes them look unauthentic

@bmorecareful436 9 месяцев назад

I am going thru and went thru every thing you mention my grand who is now 19 has the same issues when he was in school, he has now graduated.. Miraclously.. When his mom became-ill i took him in, and the strugglrs began i couldnt handle him.. So he went back home with he aunt and she's having the same problem with him being-combative, even if she ask him to take out the trash or wash his dinner dish all hell breaks loss she dont know what to do anymore, she is getting feed up with him at this point

@chandan2c 3 месяца назад

Thanks

@operastarlet 2 месяца назад

@@SanctifiedLadymaybe the problem is you. 🙄

@sheilawebb9746 Год назад

It would be neat to see examples, like played out scenarios of how these strategies could work.

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

Videos of role playing scenarios can be found in my online courses and other areas of my website. I purposely don't share too many role plays here on RU-vid, since I've already done so many that can be accessed elsewhere. Feel free to look around for those resources! teachingselfgovernment.com/store/

@piperspit9796 2 года назад

Your a blessing ☺️☺️

@CharlieSummers2.0 6 месяцев назад

Question: what exactly does “not engaging” look like?

@Mr._Johns_Productions 9 месяцев назад

I can appreciate this. Awesome foster parent ✊

@TeachingSelfGovernment 9 месяцев назад

Love it!

@Mr._Johns_Productions 9 месяцев назад

Are you doing any foster care now? Now my daughter is interesting new ways to be defiant. Guess who got home early yesterday?🤔

@myidentityisinjesus8880 2 месяца назад

After 14 years, I've learned there is no solution for ODD😢 We are a good family. My kid could have it made but everyday she makes us all miserable and refuses to be decent and so looses privileges. We have tried everything and nothing changes. I'm sick of therapists and phycologists. The best we have gotten is an antidepressant that regulates her mood so she doesn't scream and fight us for hours on end. The only light I can see anymore is the day she graduates and moves out. 💔

@Mr._Johns_Productions 9 месяцев назад

I love this video I really didn't know what my kid's problem was until today.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 9 месяцев назад

It sounds like you've got some good analysis going on. Yay!

@Mr._Johns_Productions 9 месяцев назад

My daughter has been been trying to drain the life from me for over 2 yrs. When I had a significant other we thought for a time it was maybe spiritual. Her dead mother trying be with her or maybe just a evil spirit that has been with her whole life.

@maurisagubler3230 8 месяцев назад

To be honest, every child needs these executive functioning skills.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Absolutely!

@jenniferdavis6608 Год назад

So what do you do instead of engaging? We need to know that step. If you ignore my child will hit, kick, spit on you until you are down in the floor and I'm not strong enough to restrain him. We've gone to the classes on how to restrain someone with his issues but the simple fact is he is much stronger than me and he knows it.

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

Hi Jennifer! This is a great question for my Support Group weekly call. Please submit it so I can answer it for you! Here's a link on how you can do that: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope to hear from you there!

@mandybell7884 10 месяцев назад

Do you have a course that teaches us - the parents & grandparents ? You are so mentally sound - it's a pleasure watching your video's - Thank you !

@TeachingSelfGovernment 10 месяцев назад

Yes I do! Thank you for asking! Here's the link to my TSG Parenting Course: teachingselfgovernment.com/tsg-parenting-course/ I hope this helps!

@lauralowry7048 2 года назад

I really appreciate your videos and look forward to getting the toolkit. My biggest question is how well am I preparing my son for the real world with all the pre-planned predictability in your system? I agree with it and am implementing it because I know it’s going to work as long as I am consistent. However he’s 15 1/2 now and in my adult life experiences, very little has been predictable and if I had expected a script or calmness from others, I would have been much more often disappointed and frustrated.

@A-N-D-Y-O-U Год назад

People learn by modeling others. Parenr should model the behavior they expect from a child, which is self-regulation related to big emotions and opinions, and respectful deliver of feelings (even negative ones). Also, secure attachment is important in a child feeling safe enough to learn these skills.

@nicolereadstarot 2 года назад

He was diagnosed with odd but he just acts like my narcissist ex. He only treats me bad and he has even started talking about poisoning my food, gaslighting, trying to get me to fight with my husband, making me question my own memory, weaponized incompetence, talking about me getting into accidents, saying he feels bad for my twins because I'm their mother, and when I finally react says "why are you over reacting, it was a joke 😏" or saying I am crazy. I started recording him and he immediately stops because "it's embarrassing" He feels he should be allowed to watch rated MA tv and movies, at age 11! And now he is stealing and lying.

@amandasavage2362 Год назад

Omg bless your heart start watching dr ramani on how to keep a child from developing npd . And in the mean time HANG IN THERE

@honeypie2555 Год назад

Therapy and medication are probably your only options. He may very well be a narcissist. I had a foster son like that and he even killed animals. It's brutal!

@stavroulaantoniou9898 Год назад

Professional guidance and interventions are needed. Best to do it now before adolescence.

@lenaestacks934 Год назад

@@honeypie2555that’s not her only option -

@blackpeach5 Год назад

Sounds like my son

@lauramartinez5079 Год назад

You say don’t engage but what exactly do you do when they are screaming at the top of they’re lungs right before bed when everyone else is sleeping?

@lauramartinez5079 Год назад

I can’t even be consistent with myself I’m sure I have ADHD myself and I can’t keep a consistent routine…I should be on meds I probably should have never had kids

@lenaestacks934 Год назад

I have the same issue. I get flustered and don’t handle thing right. I would cut on music and drown them out when they stop I cut it off. Better loud classical than traumatized screams in the night

@shannonlightle4931 Год назад

What we do is no engage until our kid calms down. We keep calm energy and voices. Our therapist told us to tell him we hear him and understand what he is saying, then let him know he is wrong. That’s just an example of the argument part. Bedtime routine consistency from time to order to order of good nights have saved us the bedtime nightmare. She we need to change something, we talk about it calmly and in advance when we can…but always calm backing up with good reasons and explanations. Ours is ODD, ADHD, SPD and Adjustment Disorder.

@MJ-gj6mj Год назад

Wow...you deal with that? Seriously....

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Sorry for the late response. That is a great question! The full response to your question is too long to type up here, but I'd love to learn more about your situation and have the opportunity to answer your question on one of my weekly Support Group calls that happen Wednesday mornings at 8am MST. That way, other people that have similar questions and concerns to yours can hear the answer too! If you’re interested in talking with me more about it, check out the link for more information: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

@tobyswesternwear 3 года назад

Is it possible to have a child that has ODD but be extremely smart in school? Years ago my daughter was diagnosed as having ODD but the school refuse to acknowledge the diagnosis because of her high grades. With the exception of her doing well in school, she has all the symptoms of ODD. She knew how to use the system to her advantage and was able to get the school and social services on her side. I know it's hard to believe but like I said she was very smart. Fast forward, she's an adult now and still is has the defiant behavior that I was hoping she would outgrow. Even though she was diagnosed having ODD her school talk her out of having it in which is the reason why I couldn't talk her into getting further help. Now looking back I sometimes wonder if she was misdiagnosed or is it possible to have ODD and be an exceptional student in high school and college?

@daemon469 2 года назад

I have a little brother that has odd. I take care of him, but feel the same way. I don't want to lose him as a brother, but at the same time I can't help but feel once he is an adult that I never want to be around him again.

@jarule275 Год назад

I'm not a Dr but I do know mental health is a spectrum. IQ levels vary within mental disorders. You can have a sociopath who's very clever and another who isn't. I'd just consider yourself lucky that you have a smart child. Not to mention IQ can help when treating the issue at hand. Good luck.

@jessicaanacleto9968 Год назад

My son is 4 and he carries almost all of the symptoms of ODD. He is extremely smart as well, he starts JK in a week and he already reads at a 3rd grade level! He can add, subtract, knows the planest, all the provinces/territories... so yes it com0letely possible !!

@michelifig6356 Год назад

@@isaacleeper3127 the hardest thing, and best for our angels, to do sometimes is to back. right. off. 'She is very smart on subjects she wants to.know about'. Sounds like she'll be just fine on her own. Hope you've found a happy middle ground🙏💫

@chelsiecasey2387 Год назад

This is how my daughter is at 10. Very bright, which I think sometimes makes it worse because she’s better able to manipulate. I dread the teen years, honestly.

@Justshill 3 года назад

Helo! My adult sister has ODD and its been a miserable life dealing with her. She needs a lot of help and is homeless. I have no patience for her and am very angry about the things she has done to me and the entire family. What kind of counseling do I need to be able to cope with her. She is confrontational and has been violent. Also im 1k miles away.

@shannonlightle4931 Год назад

You all need therapy..individual and family therapy, to move forward. She can’t control it but can be trained and conditioned to soften.

@jenb3940 Год назад

As hard as this may be you need to separate and let her fall on her face. Sometimes tough love is so you can give for someone to change. If you are constantly extending your hands she'll pull you down with her. Get therapy for yourself to recover and set boundaries she can't cross. It's been two years how you're doing better

@michaelmcgee7138 Год назад

How does a parent walk away from a child that has a outburst? They follow you when your trying to disengage.

@michelifig6356 Год назад

Behave the same In public and private?

@lenaestacks934 Год назад

If they follow you your doing right to walk away - a clown only has a show if it’s an audience: take care of yourself. Even in public. Walk away let them feel how the world views that behavior with out you to focus on. It may work embarrassing themselves might flip the switch

@mamareader2874 Год назад

I have this same problem. How do you walk away? My child follows me, hits me and kicks, pulls at my arms and legs. If I lock myself in a bathroom to stop getting hit she attacks the door and screams. I stay unreactive. Is this life now?? Does it ever get better?

@lakrishiw Год назад

@@mamareader2874 I walked away and locked myself in my room. I let him bang on the door. I ignored him completely until he apologized

@TwinklingofaneyewithYAHwell Год назад

I believe the outbursts are a cry for help! But they don’t know how to ask? Sometimes just being RELATABLE❤ showing that you can see them, help that pain they feel be comforted. 💝 🔐 yourself in a room is t the solution! If they are hitting, maybe try and get angry with them? In a functional way, like have a punching bag available to REPLACE the energy on the bag vs you! Or listen to them scream and look at them sadly engaged in that emotional struggle with them. But find a way to relate safely, helping them release the pressure they have built up over time then afterwards teach other ways to not go down that road again. So they can be a functional person in society. God bless Shalom

@laurajurri3813 Год назад

Thank you. This was helpful.

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

You're welcome! I'm so glad!

@OraFosters 8 месяцев назад

I have odd, adhd, anxiety and anger issues ITS ALOT TO HANDLE WITH, when on on my medicine, I’m good but when it’s at the end of the day, OR when I don’t take my medicine, I can’t control my anger half the time and stuff I just burst out mad sometimes, and stuff, but when I was like 5-9 (I think) it was very very bad and my medicine still kinda helped me but it’s still very bad.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing your experience! It sounds like you have a decent handle on things, but that you could use some skills on top of the things you're doing. Skills for calmness are a thing! I have a free Calm Parenting Toolkit that has lots of advice for getting and staying calm. It's useful whether you have children or not. :) teachingselfgovernment.com/calm-parenting-toolkit/ I hope this helps!

@iavorbalabanov8567 Год назад

how do you avoid power struggle?! you didn’t explain exact example. because i cannot figure out how to avoid the power struggle

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

Fantastic question! I would love to answer in on my Support Group weekly call. Here's a link to submit it and learn more about the group: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I've also added this to my list of video topic ideas. Thank you! I hope to hear from you soon!

@PropheticSoakingwithSarahJER 3 года назад

Firm consistent fair boundaries support children to feel safe.

@carlabellbg5724 Год назад

Do you have lessons like this for an adult in arrested development?

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Sorry for the late response! That is a great question! I don't have a system for correctional facilities, but that would be awesome! I'll have to add it to my list of ideas to work on. :) Thank you for suggesting it!

@Self_love70 3 месяца назад

I wish I knew all this. I tried everything I thought. As he got older he self medicated with illegal drugs and OD almost three years ago. I fought so hard for him 😢

@TeachingSelfGovernment 3 месяца назад

Even though things didn't turn out how you'd hoped, I'm so glad you fought for him and did what you could. Even if it feels too late, there's always time to learn new skills and improve the life you're living. You've got this!

@martamccurdy1379 Год назад

Hi ! How do me and my husband sign up for this training? We’re so desperate for help.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

So sorry for the late response! The trainings I offer are my online TSG Parenting Course and my 3-day Parenting Mastery intensive training. Here are the link for both of those so that you're sure to get what you need: teachingselfgovernment.com/tsg-parenting-course/ teachingselfgovernment.com/parenting-mastery/ I hope this helps!

@mireyamendoza4412 5 месяцев назад

Great video

@TeachingSelfGovernment 4 месяца назад

Glad you enjoyed it!

@believer2734 9 месяцев назад

You say to not engage with them in a challenge but I don’t know how you cannot when you tell them to do something and they don’t want to do it. For instance my five year old granddaughter does not want my help in her taking a shower so her only alternative was to do it herself. Now I’ve had to go in and put the conditioner in her hair and she’s the one running the show.😢

@TeachingSelfGovernment 9 месяцев назад

This situation falls into the skill of Following Instructions. There's a whole skill set for the children and parental figures, as well as for corrections when children choose not to follow instructions. Here are a few resources that could help: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-yr81UA0_Hjg.html&pp=ygUZbmljaG9sZWVuIHBlY2sgY29ycmVjdGluZw%3D%3D ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-WRbLQrZQesY.html&pp=ygUZbmljaG9sZWVuIHBlY2sgY29ycmVjdGluZw%3D%3D ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-ylO4KZuyj8I.html&pp=ygUZbmljaG9sZWVuIHBlY2sgY29ycmVjdGluZw%3D%3D You've got this!

@TiaMcHugh Год назад

I'm a teacher, I have a student who is diagnosed ADHD. However, his behavior is more O.D.D. He refuses to do any work. He wants to play, color and cut paper all day. He comes in and says, I'm not doing anything today and he means it. I'm at a loss because I try to follow his 504 for small group but he refuses EVERYTHING. Meanwhile, his mother thinks we're making the environment hard. What she doesn't know I will not argue I encourage him to participate, invite him to my table, offer him a clipboard to do his work in his clam down spot. I always offer three times then, I stop. I take what ever we are working on he didn't do and write a note saying I offered times and he refused.

@shannonl5159 Год назад

This is my son and I'm at a loss on what to do

@lenaestacks934 Год назад

The moms dealing with this all day and is tired and not thinking properly be patient and win her over with encouraging her. She’s stuck in fight mode from dealing with this child - it’s so exhausting you don’t even want to do the work with the kid because they take away your energy fighting them with the smallest of things that’s when the child wins. Don’t discredit the mom. Help return her power.

@doyouliketacosiliketacos5139 Год назад

I wish you were my kids teacher, currently have a nightmare teacher.

@nancya5632 10 месяцев назад

@@________________1678How do you suggest a parent correct the ship?

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Sorry for the late response. That is quite the situation! The full response to your comment is too long to type up here, but I'd love to learn more about your situation and have the opportunity to answer your questions on one of my weekly Support Group calls that happen Wednesday mornings at 8am MST. That way, other people that have similar questions and concerns to yours can hear the answer too! If you’re interested in talking with me more about it, check out the link for more information: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

@src4409 6 месяцев назад

My 9 year old daughter has odd and impulse control issues. She also has adhd and anxiety. She was born addicted to many substances and was taken from her birth mother. I adopted her at 19mo. She's had issues from the beginning.

@myidentityisinjesus8880 2 месяца назад

We adopted my cousin. She was a meth baby. Got her at birth for 8 months, mom got her back and was a neglectful drug addict and we spent 7 years with our little cousin in and out of our house, mom dumping and leaving and fostering 3 times. We begged for help for 6 years until finally a county took notice and a year later we adopted her. I noticed at 3 years old something was not right and at 14 we just got a diagnosis. We have tried everything you can imagine and nothing has helped change the thinking in my child's head. We have come to the point where we are counting down until graduation and she moves out. We have put everything into giving her love and support and feel like it's done nothing to help her have a good future. She is like watching a speeding train on its way to crashing and burning. I worry about her future every minute and I have prayed a million prayers for her to be healed of this. I feel like there is nothing I can do to change the course of her life for the better.💔😰

@advosetexas7988 2 года назад

I have an 8 year old grandson who’s been diagnosed with ADHD & ODD. The local school district wants to place him in a residential school hundreds of miles away. I am against this option. I am looking for any suggestions where I might get him help locally with counseling and family counseling. I am also most certain he has some degree of autism but has never been diagnosed with it. Any suggestions where I can get help for him and my family would be greatly appreciated. We live near Beaumont Texas in southeast Texas.

@michelifig6356 Год назад

Homeschooling?

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

That is a great question! The full response to your question is too long to type up here, but I'd love to learn more about your situation and have the opportunity to answer your question on one of my weekly Support Group calls that happen Wednesday mornings at 8am MST. That way, other people that have similar questions and concerns to yours can hear the answer too! If you’re interested in talking with me more about it, check out the link for more information: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

@RandomPerson-gf2cb 7 месяцев назад

Residential school will make it worse.

@kalianaray-vl6cq Год назад

You don't really discuss how, more so just give headlines to sell your knowledge as a product. I get it. We all gotta make money.... but the videos do feel disingenuous when the title suggests you discussing solutions, but then the video just tells you there's answers out there if you pay for them?

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

I'm sorry you feel this way! With some things, I've already put the information together in a very thorough, efficient way, so it makes sense to guide you to it instead of repeat myself over and over. Also, there are some topics that need more explanation than should be put in a short RU-vid video. I hope you understand.

@samanthabushnell555 6 месяцев назад

Came for this comment. Feels like I'm listening to a car salesman not a genuine guide. Is her content helpful? Probably but I'm checked out because of this cadence.

@camillehaley2553 7 месяцев назад

How do you handle a 14 yr old son why lacks any empathy towards anything feels like the world owes him every thing always constantly in trouble at school, king of playing off others and can make everything every one elses fault . I love him so much but i don't no what else i can do.oh and locks himself in the room and if i tell him he cant speak to ppl way he does and i won't let him talk to me how he does so he's pissed and wants to live with his dad....any advice its sooo needed

@TeachingSelfGovernment 7 месяцев назад

I'd love to go more in depth on this question! Since my response would be too long to type out here, I've added your question to the list of questions I'm going to answer on my Support Call this Wednesday (October 11, 2023) morning at 8am Mountain time. If you'd like to be present for the answer and discuss it with me and have access to it after the call is done, here's a link for you: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope to hear from you!

@simpleman5276 Год назад

you told us nothing

@GnomieDontPlay Год назад

1. Self Government 2. Skills and Boundaries 3. No Power Struggles 4. Consistency She gave great tips maybe just not something you you’re able to hear.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

I'm sorry you didn't find what you were hoping to. Maybe next time!

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Great list of things taught and learned!

@meganrausch8396 2 месяца назад

3:57 And when your child HAS to get into their car seat and won't? How do I just not fight with them? I can't just drive with them unbuckled

@daniellejohnson2373 11 месяцев назад

How do I stop my daughter from hitting me, biting me and kicking me

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

@ADHDNME777 3 месяца назад

If i react, my granddaughter doubles down. If I stay calm and don't react in anger, she moves on to something else. It's the reaction they desire!

@AlleyCatt611 Год назад

Is there a community support for parents of kids with ODD/ADHD? I feel alone and stressed everyday and my son's dad just doesn't understand. How can a 5 year old be so beautiful yet so nasty? So mean? So hurtful? 🥺 We're a couple weeks away from his ADHD test and ODD test and the past few weeks have been a fight everyday, I'm so worn out. Can't even figure out a way to discipline him, he's 5, no food dyes, no sugar, limited screen time only on good days. The only thing I can do as discipline is separate him from the rest of the family when he's having a terribly angry day. Sometimes it brings me to tears, but if I let him see me cry he will smile and laugh.

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

Great question! I don't know of any community like that off the top of my head, but I'm sure you're not the only one going through it. Something that could help you is the TSG Support Group weekly calls. You can submit questions and have them answered live each Wednesday morning. Here's a link to some more information about it: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

@michellethebestrealtorsimm4080 Год назад

Hey my son is 14 and was originally diagnosed with adhd then recently changed to odd and it’s been a struggle and what you described in your comments also sounds like my son if you come across a support group come back to this comment let me know and if I come across one I’ll do the same…. This shit is hard

@MJ-gj6mj Год назад

Limiting screen time is how you discipline👀 Hmm interesting. And you say he's disrespectful and makes YOU cry? Starting to see why the dad may not be the most supportive here. Sounds like you've made some parenting choices that have had colossal repercussions.

@nuriyahclj Год назад

There should be!! It's a worldwide situation, worsened, as someone in the above comments said, by today's parenting trends. I live in Mexico, and it's even rarer here. So much so, that all the therapists I visisted but the last never even mentioned it and bought into his sob stories of evil parents. I'm starting a blog in Spanish myself, hoping to spread knowledge of this and ideally, create a community. Why not start your own in your town? I'd be willing to bet theres loads of worn-out parents like us out there who don't dare to voice their nightmare of a life for fear of being tagged a bad parent. I know I was...

@zz-ic6vy 9 месяцев назад

@@MJ-gj6mjWhat you mean by your comment? That the mother is doing something wrong? Sorry English isn't my first language. I don't know what i am doing wrong but my son is so bad with me but not with his dad.

@GrayWithMe 6 месяцев назад

None of this will work unless both parents are on the same page whether they live together or not. A child needs consistency. Dealing with ADHD/ODD child with manipulative tendencies is nearly impossible when one parent chooses not to parent at all when the child is in their custody. For divorced parents you can have all the consistency you want for the week you have them but when you drop them off at the other house all the progress you have made is gone

@lisalisayoga 4 месяца назад

100% couldn’t agree more! Going through this with my husband. Absolutely will not get on the same page and has now created issues not only in the marriage but with our 4 year old son. The lack of consistency has created confusion which I believe has led to ODD symptoms.

@electrictofumuffins6384 2 месяца назад

The food additives are causing many mood problems in children. Food dye is a big problem for example.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 2 месяца назад

It definitely can be for some people. I'm glad you're aware and watching out for your family!

@thefletchlife7837 9 месяцев назад

Somewhat flawed. ODD is considered a precursor to ASPD. Traits associated with these behaviours are (among others), lack of empathy and poor impulse control, risk taking, willfully breaking rules and violation of rights. Relying on self control is a fundamentally flawed approach. In addition, research indicates these individuals have reduced frontal lobe and limbic system function. Go to a licensed clinician.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 9 месяцев назад

Thank you for your comment. While I don't claim to be a clinical professional or therapist, I have worked with many children and teens who have been professionally diagnosed with ODD and other disorders. The advice I give is what I have seen work and have a positive impact on individuals who experience these conditions. It might differ from what licensed clinicians teach or recommend, and that is okay. If you don't agree with what I share, that's okay too. I will never hold that against you. :)

@Finlaytait Год назад

I have ODD😢

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

It happens! But you still have the capacity for self-government. :) You've got this!

@adamtechsolutions5331 8 месяцев назад

You push people to buy your course. you have an oppositional definat disorder yourself. Parents are struggling daily with their problems that no one solve and then you come out as the savior when people buy your course. Thanks

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

You have some interesting thoughts here. There's only so much I can share on RU-vid and there is so much more information and depth in my online course. I recommend it as a resource, since people are more likely to pay attention to what is being taught if they had to purchase it. Also, in order for me to keep creating content and making additional resources for people, the company has to have income. I don't take a paycheck from sales or anything. It all goes back into making sure we have resources for those who are searching for and needing them.

@anonymouspatriotnetwork2740 Год назад

The funny thing is odd is a rare disorder and because it's odd inmates it odd which is another term for rare.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Interesting thoughts. Thanks for sharing.

@dianathomas2674 Год назад

Strange that such disorder didn't exist when parents and teachers were respected positions and children were disciplined if disobedient. Now children are encouraged to make their own decisions, yet expected to do school work. How do people not see this is illogical? How can a child respect a school environment where children get a litterbox if they say they are animals, and parents who go with the childs whims like sailboats without sails? Kiddo had two lessons at school, where he was told children can decide and do whatever they want. He came home acting like a defiant narcissist. It took some serious, logical explaining to repair the damage. I did surely ask if the kids left the classroom. He said they were talking about doing it. 😂

@MJ-gj6mj Год назад

Umm yes...I am truly wondering what ODD is vs a disrespectful child who didn't get taught to respect authority. It's interesting to say the least!

@tnlizzie2000 10 месяцев назад

@@MJ-gj6mj I'm momma to two littles, raised in the same house, same rules, same discipline style, etc. My oldest has her moments of rebellion, but with discipline and discussion we can navigate that rebellion quickly for the most part. My second girl is why I'm on this video. Every discipline method except time out makes her tantrums/anger/what ever is going on massively worse. And you can see the look on her face that she's miserable and doesn't know how to stop doing what she's doing, but she isn't processing the world in the same manner as the rest of us. She may very well be on the autism spectrum as well, but I'm here to gather as much information as I can after noticing a breakthrough when using methods like time out, me absolutely not losing my cool, being quietly firm, and teaching her in moments of quiet tools for self-regulation. Her tantrums are starting to calm down much, much faster and she's starting to cut back on the sheer defiant stances on everything. All that to say, there's something very different going on with my second than other kids her age, and even other kids in my household. Comments like these are harmful because they increase the likelihood a parent will not look further into their child's behavior than the black and white of the matter. And it frankly is arrogant to assume parents who are parenting well won't see odd in their children.

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

I appreciate you sharing your thoughts! It is something to consider, for sure... :)

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

Thank you for sharing your experiences and thoughts!

@elismycat Год назад

Please do roleplaying. (

@TeachingSelfGovernment Год назад

Hi Nina! I've done some role playing in some of my other videos. However, I don't do much of it in my videos here on RU-vid here since I wouldn't be able to role play everything and I do quite a bit of it in my online TSG Parenting Course, which can be found on my website. If it's something you'd like to look into, here's the link: teachingselfgovernment.com/tsg-parenting-course/ I hope this helps!

@alexsandrapeguero5680 Год назад

Hi how are ? Can you please come to my house ? 😢my son is already 22 years old .

@TeachingSelfGovernment 8 месяцев назад

That actually IS an option, though it is somewhat costly. I would need to have a one-on-one mentor call with you to assess your situation and see if a home visit is really needed. I'd be happy to have one with you. Here's a link to set that up: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/mentoring-call-with-nicholeen/ I hope that helps!