My 17-Year-Old Wants to Get Married Next Year (Help!)

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My 17-Year-Old Wants to Get Married Next Year (Help!)
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15 янв 2024

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Комментарии : 900

@DominickSpano 5 месяцев назад

BTW the caller was awesome. He seems like such a caring father to his daughter that is approaching this with an open heart and open mind. Seems like a real gem of a father, the daughter is lucky to have him as a father.

@brandyk 5 месяцев назад

Yes and no. I think he's too worried about what his daughter thinks and some kids will manipulate their parents to this way nowadays. I can't actually believe she thinks they should pay for a wedding!

@MzShonuff123 4 месяца назад

I love how little judgement he puts on his daughter. But I gotta say a lot of this is just them wanting to have sex ASAP. They’re probably religious and have told them they can’t have sex til they’re married. This is what happens when you raise them with those beliefs-this is the other side of that.

@eb1680 4 месяца назад

As a dad, I don’t know if I would be that mellow.

@thearmy88ify 22 дня назад

This conversation should have been had 5 years ago and every year since...failed

@revdavidpeters 5 месяцев назад

I’m soooooooooo glad I didn’t marry the girl I thought I was going to marry at 17. God blessed me with an almost perfect woman at age 24 😉. My brother, however, did get married at 19 and wife 18. They have a wonderful life and 3 great kids. It isn’t about the age, it’s about the people involved in the marriage.

@user-qo7zp4pq6x 5 месяцев назад

Right on!!!

@judyczyz1297 5 месяцев назад

Exactly! I married at 18. 8 months after we met. Now married 44 years. I will say I knew once I turned 18 I had to have a job with health insurance. Kids today can stay on there parents insurance till 26. It’s a whole different world out there now. Most kids today are not that mature, like it was back 30, 40 years ago.

@theaxe6198 5 месяцев назад

My daughter is 15. I cannot imagine this

@razmiddle9410 5 месяцев назад

@@judyczyz1297 I think that's the difference - if you're financially independent and prepared to live on your own as a self-sustaining unit, that's a different situation than dependents basically playing at marriage.

@Nitroscion 5 месяцев назад

I’m 39 and I’ve been with my wife since I was 17. Best decision I’ve ever made. I 100% agree with you that it’s the people involved and not the age that matters.

@darlayeates510 5 месяцев назад

My daughter, at 16 came home one night with a promise ring from her 18 year old boyfriend. I hardly took it seriously. But 2 years later at 18 and 20 they were married. They have been married now for 18 years, and they have the best behaved 5 children. He fought his way through school and has become a partner in his accounting firm. Our daughter has been able to be a stay at home mom. They are as happy as can be. I hate how acceptable it is now days to be in your 30's (40's) and still not be fully responsible and capable.

@tspencer661 5 месяцев назад

My daughter has had a promise ring for the past two years. She got it on her 16th birthday. She and her boyfriend have been together for two and a half years. I know they’ll get married one day, but they both want to finish college first. They’re in no rush.

@lifestylehomestead 5 месяцев назад

That's wonderful! And I completely agree!

@jercasgav 5 месяцев назад

I totally agree! I have seen too many cases where people lose that special someone because they have to wait until they are 28-30yrs old to marry...or they rush and marry the wrong person at 28-30yrs old because they don't want to be "too old". Why is it better to spend your young years in typically serially monogamous relationships, having sex, and staying at each other's apartments or even living together a long time unmarried because one is "too young to marry"? The damage done from doing this and waiting without a good reason is worse in my opinion. I got engaged to my husband at 21yrs and married at 22yrs. We met in nursing school getting our bachelor's degrees and married immediately after we graduated. Have been married 17yrs and have a 13yr old son. We both agree we actually wish we had met younger. We both came from divorced homes and we helped each other survive financially as well as emotionally through college. Both of us coming from divorced homes made us very convicted in staying married, and in wanting to create the security in our adult lives we never had as children.

@sobeliever1638 5 месяцев назад

Most 18 year Olds today should not be married and you are right waiting into well into your 30s may not work out especially fertility wise but it does for some people. Good thing people like your daughter have the freedom so don't judge the orher side as well

@faithli2131 5 месяцев назад

Amen.

@KristenS-mu1oc 5 месяцев назад

Plot twist: The kids shack up and call the Ramsey show for financial advice and Dave and John say “Go to the courthouse and get married today!” 😂

@jonathanmartin2360 4 месяца назад

Exactly, such contradictory advice from this guy.

@personperson9635 5 месяцев назад

I met my husband my senior of high school. The day we met, my mom said, you have to graduate college before you get married. A man can leave you but your education won't. I honored my mother and got married a week after college graduation, married 22 years! I'm thankful for my mother's wisdom!

@gretz5792 27 дней назад

I’m glad you honored your mother and got to marry your husband as well. Everyone wins :)

@lindsay3793 5 месяцев назад

She wants to get married but refuses to pay for her own car insurance: the answer is NO. Grow up first.

@KS-cl8br 5 месяцев назад

under 18 her parents are responsible for her expenses ... she is 17

@alqoshgirl 5 месяцев назад

What?? Why are western people so weird on what they consider maturity?

@Rouge1292 5 месяцев назад

She’s been paying for her own car insurance. Her dad helped her set that payment up.

@HTOWN535 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirl Trust me if you've seen 17-year-olds today in the west they are nowhere near mature. Having a full-time job most kids won't do it. Let me guess you're not from the States? Things cost money here my friend. Idk how you find this weird statistically the younger you are when you get married here it does not workout.

@lindsay3793 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirl Because western people are in prison (aka "school") until they are eighteen. You are literally property until you are eighteen. It is a very sheltered culture. You don't work, you don't own anything, you don't have any money... then suddenly you are expected to know how to juggle all of that overnight. You are lucky if you have parents who care at all, but most parents are tuned out because they are burnt out trying to survive, themselves.

@narrowpathfarm 5 месяцев назад

Kids should get pre marital counseling

@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife 5 месяцев назад

Yes! I got married when I was 18. My husband and I went through our churches pre marriage counseling. It was great. We're still happy 8 years later.

@anna_burks 3 месяца назад

All couples would likely be better off for it.

@GAFB1122 5 месяцев назад

As a parent myself, the answer is so simple. I would say you are too young but I cannot control you and you will be an adult. If you choose to go thru with this so be it. I will be there for you emotionally BUT you are absolutely 100% cut off financially. And it's not because I don't love you BUT it's because you want to be an adult so bad, well, this is what adults like me do. We pay for everything ourselves and don't live off anyone!!

@swayzieandchinita 5 месяцев назад

Great answer. 👍🏼

@Allthekingshorses2 5 месяцев назад

Same.. this is exactly my answer too…

@Eric_Bassett 5 месяцев назад

Much better than johns crummy scorched earth approach.

@chrissyellem7397 5 месяцев назад

Glad you're not my parent. Being a single mom of an autistic son there is NO WAY we could have made it without my parents help for the past almost 3 decades. It isn't about GROWING UP it's about helping your family when they need it. Cutting your child off is wrong.

@GAFB1122 5 месяцев назад

@chrissyellem7397 You really think that is the same. You didn't ask to have an autistic son and your son didn't ask to be autistic. So your reply is NOT relevant to my comment. I would not cut someone off in the situation you describe BUT I hold to my comment for wanna be adults who want to make their own decisions.

@lks6248 5 месяцев назад

I was 17 when I met who I knew was my soulmate. We waited a number of years before marriage, not that it would have made a difference, and married now for 40 years. We definitely did NOT have children early. As for the wedding costs pay for them but it’s fair to say to the daughter that you’ll pay for a wedding only ONCE.

@0seve291 5 месяцев назад

40 years im guessing no internet things are diff now most cheat!

@midmichiganorv 5 месяцев назад

Hopefully only once🤣

@JustLIkerapunzel 5 месяцев назад

I could not imagine getting married and having the parents pay for that in western society at least. Just doesn't make sense to me! You habe to be a full adult to make such a decision whcih comes with the responsibikities that follow marriage : To be in charge of your shared finances. The only reason for parents to pay is in my opinion if you're living in a country with no social security, cause then you'd have to be able to rely only on your savings to survive if one of the spouses gets hit by a crisis that leads to an i come loss

@corackadile 5 месяцев назад

@JustLIkerapunzel hmmm it's actually fairly common for the bride's parents to contribute or pay for the wedding. But that may also be a sub cultural thing within the west. I'm greek and that's not unusual at all.

@sweetpeasandyarrowaranchdi8327 5 месяцев назад

@corackadile I think it's fairly common. If they don't have enough money to contribute, then the couple pays.

@Valpo2004 5 месяцев назад

The thing that was not mentioned quite frankly is the question of "why do you want to get married so soon?" My fear is that the real reason is that they are waiting til marriage to have sex and want to get married in a hurry so they can start having sex. Which is likely not a reason they would want to share with their parents...

@yellowstar11193 5 месяцев назад

Exactly my thought too

@tfernandez6806 5 месяцев назад

Exactly! It’s all that purity ring thing and pressure so they have a fantasy…without financial experience! C’mon

@samh5218 5 месяцев назад

I agree. That thought crossed my mind.

@hideyable 5 месяцев назад

As someone who comes from a country with much better sexual education at school, this thought hadn't even crossed my mind. If purity culture is so ingrained in American culture that teenagers are getting married just so that they're "allowed" to have sex, that's terrifying 😳

@privacyplease1556 5 месяцев назад

It’s the only reason someone chooses to get married at that age.

@greenAbbot 5 месяцев назад

I started dating my wife when I was 19 and she was 17. We knew we weren’t close developmentally to being ready to make that kind of commitment. When we finally got married six years later, there was not a doubt in anyone’s mind that we were meant for each other, and there hasn’t been a doubt in the 30 years since. All the people I know who got married too early did it because they were told they couldn’t have sex or live together until they did.

@yosemite735 5 месяцев назад

@@sometimesising1016 Why marry so quickly? See how it works out first.

@patriciawulf3830 5 месяцев назад

That kind of reminds me of the new term NATO dating: Not Attached to an Outcome Dating is the catchy new way to say take dating mindfully and don't push things too fast. Just like you did.

@esinfa 5 месяцев назад

İf you are all in it you give ypor 100% to make it work which is a must for any relationship or marriage to work. Marriage because of the mindset and commitment sets you up success and relationship because of the lack of these sets you up for failiure.

@mandyr 5 месяцев назад

I got married at 18, my husband was 19. We both had full time jobs and he had already been living on his own since 17 after graduating high school early. I was already paying for my car insurance and cell phone. We didn’t go to college, we didn’t have debt. Our Christian faith was our priority as well as our sexual purity, so that was partial motivation to our early wedding. Our parents did not support us financially in any way after we were married. Best decision we ever made. Yes, we had some growing up to do together but our marriage is very strong. We’ve been married for over 12 years now. We didn’t have children until 9 years in. It’s not as scary as this video seems to be if both people are wise enough and already bearing responsibility well. The prolonged infantilization and perpetual support of children in today’s society is doing them a disservice. College is not an essential and I do NOT regret getting married instead of going to college.

@ineedhoez 5 месяцев назад

I mean you say that but you're probably kind of broke. On average, having a college degree means you're going to make a million more dollars over the course of your lifetime.

@mandyr 5 месяцев назад

No, we aren’t broke. We have plenty on just my husband’s income. We have a nice emergency fund and no debt. We bought both our cars with cash. We own our home. I’m free to stay home with both our children and have no need to work outside the home anymore (though I could if I wanted to). It’s been a huge blessing to not have anything hanging over our heads that would keep us from achieving our dreams - without the college degrees. We both have had successful careers in the sectors and industries we always wanted to work in. Granted, by getting married young we didn’t have much at first but we were afforded TIME. Time to start investing for retirement and savings. We just had to make wise choices. Marrying young isn’t for everyone, but I wouldn’t change a thing. Mind y’all we are millennials too so we went against the grain of most people in our generation.

@sherip1270 5 месяцев назад

@@ineedhoez With the Lord, all things are possible.

@brandyk 5 месяцев назад

@@mandyrvery happy for you. Great job. I thought this was going to be another post from people who did this 50 years ago which let's be honest is not exactly the same thing. Continued success

@mandyr 5 месяцев назад

@@sherip1270yes, to God be the glory.

@realnerd3142 5 месяцев назад

I met my husband at 14, married right after my 19th birthday (6 months after high school graduation). I made it through college easily. We just had our firstborn child at 25 years old but have two amazing teens through foster care, one has an adoption date coming up in February! We’re very happy in our unconventional family.

@kathyalex778 4 месяца назад

You’re 25 and you’ve adopted teens??

@CloakedC 5 месяцев назад

I'm very impressed by this dad who called in. I like how he thinks and communicates with his child and Dr John

@jamiecone9151 5 месяцев назад

What an amazing father figure. This girl is so blessed to have this man as her father

@ethandowler4669 5 месяцев назад

My advice would be to COACH them. They CAN make it if you prepare them. Support and training are what they need. They don’t know what they don’t know. It’s the parents’ job to teach them! Sounds like the dad on this call knows that, but I wanted to throw it out there.

@rachelmaddowswife8713 5 месяцев назад

A parent can't give a crash course to a 17 year old child to do all the growing up that the next eight years of life experience would provide though, there's no way to make that personal growth that happens by age 25 other than living it yourself. Don't you remember being a teenager? You think your parents are morons and that you're the smartest person in the world who has everything figured out. Then you go to college and have to do your own laundry, wake yourself up on time, and pay your own bills, and you realize life is a lot harder than you thought. These kids will learn the hard way, and it's better that they do that learning without making the mistake of legally tying themselves to each other. They'll be responsible for 100% of each other's college loans for example if they marry now, so the consequences of "oops, actually we should get a divorce" can be devastating. In cultures where everyone stops school as a young teen and has already been living an adult lifestyle in the workforce by their late teens, maybe a late teen marriage isn't so bad, but in the US a 17 year old is a fully dependent child. And I say this as someone who had multiple jobs by middle school to help with my parents' bills, I was still very much a child.

@marycarricaburu3683 5 месяцев назад

@@rachelmaddowswife8713 This is why you should begin at an early age teaching them what they need to know before they leave the nest. I had a "hope chest", my daughters did also, when they were 13 or so, I started gradually filling it with pots, silverware, linens, etc. and they learned how to budget by watching me. We did not have a lot of money so I had to do it a little bit at a time. I am 90 and they are 58 and 60. Each one understood they would leave home and I did my best to prepare them. There is no reason to have to give a girl ready for college or marriage or the military a crash course.

@ethandowler4669 5 месяцев назад

@@rachelmaddowswife8713 I'm not saying they're going to be 100% mature, but that doesn't mean you can't get married if you get married for the right reasons. Marriage forces you to grow up, and it's meant to be a long-term commitment. It sounds like this dad has been teaching his daughter how to be mature for a long time. It's hard to give blanket advice, but this is just my experience.

@rachelmaddowswife8713 5 месяцев назад

@@ethandowler4669 Of course they "can" get married when they're 18, the question is is this the best time for them to get married. Statistically, no, it's not. They would almost certainly have an easier marriage if they're able to stay boyfriend/girlfriend throughout college and marry in their mid 20's. Plenty of people don't step up to the plate and magically mature just because they signed a marriage license. All my divorced female friends assumed their male partners would stop acting like teen boys and man up, and they didn't. You're going to keep growing and changing throughout life, so even if you marry at 40 you'll still need to keep learning and accommodating each other, but the difference between 18 and 25 is massive, 18 is still a child in our culture in terms of psychology and life experience.

@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife 5 месяцев назад

Yesssss!

@ethandowler4669 5 месяцев назад

I wanted to marry my high school sweetheart, too, but we waited til the middle of college. It was a good thing b/c we were able to test our relationship in the “real world” and it needed it. We ended up fighting for our relationship during those dating-in-college years, and we’re about to celebrate 10 years of marriage in May!

@ethandowler4669 5 месяцев назад

Once we got married, our parents stopped all financial support. They weren’t paying much before that anyway haha

@KS-cl8br 5 месяцев назад

@@ethandowler4669Thats okay you can remember that when they get old if they need money

@BrianAnu 5 месяцев назад

Great story, congrats Ethan!

@gbear34 5 месяцев назад

Congrats!!

@nightfangs2910 5 месяцев назад

Your a rare case but kudos to both of you, most people as they move through their 20s have a very different life view by the time college is done

@melodyg4727 5 месяцев назад

It's not that they can't get married, but in being married, that means they are a new independent unit from both sets of parents. If they require to be financially supported then they're not ready. To be married means you are a new unit, completely cleaved from parental support. New privileges, but a whole new set of responsibilities individually and as a couple. I felt ready to be married at 20, but that was because I had been making my own money since I was 15. I got myself my own scholarship to university, I was running my own life, doing my own taxes, paying for and driving my own car. I started buying and saving my own household items for my eventual home at 15 and my Mum allowed me to use half her attic space as storage. I also only dated one guy before my husband, because I also only had a view of dating for the purpose of marriage. Ultimately, I ended up marrying at 22.

@nt3833 4 месяца назад

Agree with you on the financials. Also, dating SHOULD be for the purpose of finding a spouse. People screw around too much today (pun somewhat intended) and that’s why I believe we have so much divorce.

@JustinCase780 5 месяцев назад

The only couples I knew that succeeded with marriage at that age didn't go to college. Everyone that tried it with college divorced. An insignificant sample size but just sharing what seemed pretty common. That being said I know couples that waited until post college and married that are most successful including my parents and also couples in my generation. College is a hugh test as many break up and are better off.

@RichObiQuan 5 месяцев назад

No you’re spitting facts rn. Especially at that age in this new era. Not like how it was in the 70s-90s

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

Social media will destroy 99% of these teenage marriages. The brain isnt even fully developed at that age which is why they make impulsive decisions. On top of that seeing their peers go out and party, travel, getting attention from the opposite sex, etc on social media will make most couples feel like they are missing out.

@stillwatersfarm8499 5 месяцев назад

This what I have observed as well.

@kathrynharvey3640 4 месяца назад

My husband and I were married at 18 and 19. I have my BA and he has a Masters and it was the best decision ever. Married 27 years. Just depends on the kids.

@Nillybilly 4 месяца назад

My husband and I got married at 18&20, I finished up some college online and worked part time from home our first year of marriage but he has always solely provided for us working construction and then started his own business. I agree that college would’ve made it so much harder for us. I think it’s good for kids to get married young and figure out what real life is like and what real love is like - and working in the trades is underrated.

@hwinny2 5 месяцев назад

I got married right when I turned 19. Way too young. I did not have the opportunity to go to college because of it, then I had children right away. I was planning on 3 years, but got pregnant honeymoon night. I will never regret having my children, but I will always regret not finishing college and beginning a career first. I made for a very unhealthy marriage and power and earning disproportionate relationship where who I was or what was important to me was squashed.

@alqoshgirl 5 месяцев назад

Sadly you’re wrong. It was best to have kids first and career later. It’s sad you couldn’t love what you had in the moment. We can see in society now how messed up many people’s life are because they chose career over a family when young.

@Jennie-hi2ti 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirlno you’re wrong. How can you tell someone else how to see their life. That’s her life you’re saying is wrong, and you’re saying it’s wrong because of what, society? If we went by society’s standards, then your statement and everyone else’s beliefs would be wrong as well. She’s giving her perspective, you know nothing about her to know why she felt that way, the small things that built up to how she came to this judgement. OP, I see your stance, and I think it’s real how you are able to admit how you truly feel. Ignore the commenter who wants to be judgmental and tell you how you should see or live your life.

@alqoshgirl 5 месяцев назад

@@Jennie-hi2ti society tells her she did her life wrong and she should’ve chosen a useless degree and career over a loving family. Yes I can tell people what is right as this is a public forum where people share opinions idiot

@hwinny2 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirl there might be some truth in what you say if you had two whole and healthy individuals going into a marriage with community and family support. If not, there is a lot of room for abuse.

@melstarr1864 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirl I believe that getting the education first is much easier. You may decide to postpone the career a bit for the sake of raising children, but it is much easier to get the education when you don’t have kids.

@amyridley3926 5 месяцев назад

If you want to get married, you're on your own financially.

@MD-vm8tc 5 месяцев назад

At age 14 I knew I wanted to marry my boyfriend. At age 18, a couple of months after high school we got married. We've been happy and prosperous for 25 years now. We were always more mature and planned/ saved in high school, so this was not a childish decision on our part. It's not for everyone, but it was perfect for us!

@SpoonHurler 5 месяцев назад

I got married two days after I graduated high school. I had a job and an apartment because I got emancipated when I was 16. I grew up with wait till you get married to have sex and so this seemed like the best decision ever. I highly doubt I'd marry my now ex-wife (divorced at 25) if we waited until we were 20. A lot of flags became apparent in those two years. Telling them both the weight of all of it is hard but to me is a tremendous act of love. Caller sounds like a great dad.

@am5635 5 месяцев назад

Looking back now, what do you think motivated you to get married so soon?

@SpoonHurler 5 месяцев назад

@@am5635 I truly believed that God didn't want people who weren't married to have sex. I was part of True Love Waits since 6th grade and it was all that either I grasped or was told. Get married to someone in your same church and you're good. When I was 20 I started actually reading and there was way more depth to the true love parts and as John points out a 17 year olds grasp of "love" is vastly different then someone even in their 20s. For example, my mother in law got very ill (on dialysis type ill) and my wife refused to help me and by brother in law take care of her until she passed away a year and a half later. Along with a lot of other entitlements I never noticed as a lovestruck 15 year old. Not saying I was perfect either, I am a lot to deal with too, if something needs (or I think it needs) to be done, it HAS to get done and that can be grating to someone that hasn't agreed to it. TL;DR: High School is a terrible time to determine compatibility.

@ninjarooster9258 5 месяцев назад

Dang dude, are you me?

@firefly9838 5 месяцев назад

You married to have sex😂 bro what an idiot

@rickypv2978 5 месяцев назад

@@am5635 coochie that's what motivated him

@jamieboll7479 5 месяцев назад

My husband and I got married right out of high school with both our parents support. They paid for our beautiful wedding but we were self sufficient after that. We’ve been married almost 28 years and are so happy with each other and our family. It’s not a one size fits all. We were mature enough to handle life. Both our sons also married right out of high school and have been married with children for many years as well. Best wishes to you, parenting isn’t easy!

@jman64491 5 месяцев назад

I was married when I was 18 too. It was great for my husband and I. We were responsible and hard working. Weve been married for 21 years. We got engaged after 6 months, and had a 9 month engagement. My husband says his only regret is how long our engagement was. 😅 being married young is not always negative. John should of asked the caller if he felt these two were mature or not. My parents trusted me and my husband and felt we could handle it.

@hannahrobinson4078 5 месяцев назад

When she’s 18 she can do whatever she wants… but that also means you’re under no obligation to pay her bills. “I don’t support the idea of you getting married right now. I feel as though you should wait a little longer and experience this relationship in the real world. That being said, you can do what you want when you’re an adult, but I will not be paying any bills for you once you get married.”

@tatyanadifort 5 месяцев назад

I got married at barely 17. My husband was 18. We have been married 16.5 years. I love my husband more now than i did then. .. but i will say that we definitely did life at the hardest setting possible by marrying that early, and it is by the grace of God we are happily married still. We had to break many codependent habits along the way. I picked the right person... just should have grown up a bit more and learned how to be an individual first.

@Eirikr430428 5 месяцев назад

I’d argue the path you took was the only way you were going to learn the virtues you now have. That’s how it’s been for me. I was never “ready” for any major life decision until I had finally done it, messed it up, and come out on the other side a little wiser for it. It’s too bad we don’t get a practice round!

@tatyanadifort 5 месяцев назад

@Eirikr430428 it's true. We have just this one life. Learning from the trials of others would save us a lot of heartache if we were to realize what they have to teach us before making our own mistakes. But hindsight is usually 20/20 and seeing clearly in the midst of the problem is nearly impossible.

@Eirikr430428 5 месяцев назад

@@tatyanadifort I meant to comment on “being an individual first” before marriage. To me, that sounds like getting set in your ways that would only hinder the marriage relationship later on. I think the grass is always greener, and delayed maturity (including delayed marriage) is a difficult problem we face.

@elizabethblane201 5 месяцев назад

For every "successful" teen marriage touted in these comments, how many failures are there that people don't admit to?

@gbear34 5 месяцев назад

How many 60 years olds have been married 3 times? Until 80 years ago, Marriage at 18 years old was perfectly normal. They also didn't divorce as much as we do now. Was it perfect? No, but it was better for children and families overall.

@SIGSEGV1337 5 месяцев назад

Failure is part of life, you get up, dust yourself off and try again.

@EadsB7002 5 месяцев назад

Exactly. Times are so much different now than 20-30+ years ago. it's like comparing apples to oranges.

@tracyaf6084 5 месяцев назад

@@gbear34a lot. I’m in my 40s so parents to kids my age are 60s and up. Probably half of my friends in school came from divorced homes. My parents married in their mid 20s and were married 55 years when my mom died.

@lebumjames1373 5 месяцев назад

@@gbear34Lol they didn't divorce as much because there was way less information and resources for women especially in abusive relationships.

@LadySleuth 5 месяцев назад

Aaand the girl will get pregnant "accidentally" and will have to drop out of college to raise the child while the guy finishes college, gets a degree and moves on with his career. Than of course issues will come and they will get a divorce and the girl will be a struggling single mom living paycheck to paycheck while the guy will go ahead and get married with a more mature mindset and career perspective and will start a new family. The end!

@joycevalenzuela8495 5 месяцев назад

This is true

@michaelrueckert8507 5 месяцев назад

I got married at 19. My wife was 21. Now we've been married for 7 years and are more in love than ever. We love that we built our lives together and had no other experiences with other people. Neither one of us ever dated anyone else so we have no baggage at all. I hate that everyone is encouraged to wait. If you are raised to be committed it's not risky to get married so young.

@michaelrueckert8507 5 месяцев назад

To add to this, I was 12 when I met her and knew very early on that I wanted to be with her. 🤷‍♂️ Neither of us went to college either and both have successful jobs. I'm surprised by John's response to this caller.

@michaelrueckert8507 5 месяцев назад

You're talking like 18 year olds have the maturity of a 10 year old. That's messed up.

@DogmaGirlAD 5 месяцев назад

My parents wanted me to get married about 3 months later than I did (and mentioned that they could help out more if I waited). Did I wait? Nope. I didn't want a fancy wedding or to spend a lot of money on it. I just wanted to not drag out the engagement process when we had thought through a lot of things (that we could - of course there's stuff that you can't figure out beforehand that will always be). We both believed in waiting for sex until marriage and both looked at ourselves and was like that's going to be a hard one when we already know what we want in this deal. Not waiting isn't always about maturity. Sometimes it's being mature enough to know yourself and what you wNt in life etc. We were also told to wait at least a year before getting pregnant with our 1st. Didn't follow that recommendation either. Sometimes when people take a path and they regret it they assumed that everyone else who does that is also going to regret it just because they did. Gave birth to our 4th a year ago - honestly, I kind of wish that some of this timeline was even earlier than it was... Very glad I didn't listen to recommendations to delay it even more than it already was delayed. If your daughter throws a fit about it being too long to wait then you can say something about her maturity. But, sometimes you need to respect when your adult child leaves a generous offer from you on the table because maybe what they want in life is a little bit different than what you want or what you think they want. I feel no entitlement to my parents money or my parents babysitting help or anything else. When they give it, I am thankful. But, often when they give it under conditions, I say "no thanks, but thank you so much for the generous offer." And I don't believe that's immaturity on my part 🤷‍♀️

@shoshanas5251 5 месяцев назад

Such maturity on your part. Had fun reading your comment. Awesome job! Blessings!

@Sara_The_Feral_Housewife 5 месяцев назад

Yes! This is similar to my story. I didn't follow anyone's advice (especially not the divorced ones). Got married at 18, got pregnant on the honeymoon, and basically did everything people said not to do. We're 4 kids in, 8 years, and still completely happy and confident that we made the right choice.

@Buff19 5 месяцев назад

I appreciate the dad trying to talk it out. My 18yr old son is hoping to get married soon. He enlisted last year, is working about 35hrs/wk and finishing his senior year. He’s ready to move into adulthood. I got married at 19 and we’re about to celebrate 20yrs.

@ivankrushensky Месяц назад

Sounds like he has a solid plan. Income, health benefits and so on. The scary part would be if it were two people shacking up in grandma's basement and wanting to get married, with no legitimate ambitions. Then we would have to have a talk.

@MacM15 5 месяцев назад

I got married at 18. 9 years and 2 kids later and It’s been a good thing for us. I really think it highly depends of how the couple thinks and approaches life. ❤ Side note and not necessarily something I’d recommend but I got pregnant 2 months in. We have wonderful kids and a wonderful life.

@joycevalenzuela8495 5 месяцев назад

Thank you for this, needed to hear it. Also a mom going through these tough teenage years of parenting.

@LoganGabrielleMUA 5 месяцев назад

I think this a great opportunity to to vet her boyfriend and prepare her for marriage-regardless of if they ultimately marry. Once kids leave the home you loss so much visibility into their dating choices.

@anna_burks 3 месяца назад

My husband and I started dating at 17 (following an 11 year friendship.) We were dating with intention and within 6 months had covered all the bases on morals, values, beliefs, boundaries, and the important things we want out of life. When he was medically discharged from the corps and came home to work as a mechanic, we were engaged and married within the year. He was already working, and I had already secured several scholarships that more than covered my schooling. I’m about to graduate college now and am 8 months pregnant with our first child. I am so thankful for him and for the life we have together. Having said that, we did have a small wedding and we’re not completely cut off from our parents financially, though we were prepared to be. No matter their age, if someone wants to be married but also wants their parents to fund their lifestyle, they’re setting themselves up for failure.

@alexisballard1459 5 месяцев назад

I’m so appreciative of this discussion. I’m not even looking to agree or disagree, I’m curious to know the different ways to approach this life situation, THANK YOU for this channel ❤

@simplygina7703 5 месяцев назад

At 18 I wanted to get married. I’m now 23 and I feel like that was a lifetime ago! I was a baby! Thank goodness it didn’t work out- I had a lot of maturing to do. And I still do. This poor girl ought to live some life on her own and be responsible before saying yes to forever with someone. 😅❤

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

most marriages in America end in divorce anyways so in the big picture it really doesnt matter what age she marries

@ThePlainNsimple 5 месяцев назад

u made a terrible mistake. You gonna wait til 35 (when men no longer have any interest in marrying you) to start looking to settle down? I would never marry a woman over 24.

@simplygina7703 5 месяцев назад

@@ThePlainNsimple 😂

@jazzycarlianna 4 месяца назад

@@boston312Go deeper on the data: the older and better educated you are when you get married, the less likely you are to divorce. That's why John thinks this is a bad idea.

@boston312 4 месяца назад

so maybe the divorce rate decreases from 52% to 40% if you marry older. The chances are still extremely risky marrying in America. Especially as a man, where you can end up paying child support, alimony payments, losing assets and a pension. Dr John has sent many men to the slaughter house with his pro marriage views@@jazzycarlianna

@kathylovesmk 5 месяцев назад

If they get married at 18, then they are choosing to enter FULL adulthood at that time. Working, paying her own bills, etc. All that being said, my first love I was with for 10 years (14-24). I broke up with him, feeling like we were too young, and I wanted to see what else was out in the world. I'm now 58 and it turns out he was the love of my life. 💔 It's impossible for the parents to know if they'll last or not.

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

go to Jamaica and get a Rent a Dread

@GameChanger597 5 месяцев назад

Unfortunately that's the message the world tries to brainwash Society with. It's always about you. You first. Live your life to the fullest and complete the long list of everything you want in life first before you settle down and have kids. People don't realize it's better to fulfill that list with your family then alone and just because you have a family doesn't mean you're not independent. It is a message being spoken especially to women and that is why so many women are having kids in their late thirties and forties now. Unfortunately they don't realize this is a ploy from the government for population control just to name one.

@farfallina16 5 месяцев назад

Married at 19 and 22 here. We hit 20 years this year, happier and healthier than ever. My aunt married at 19. She is still happily married 50 years later. Once you're an adult, you can make the choice you want to make. So as a parent, support them by preparing them to make those choices wisely. The #1 best thing my parents did was not fight with me, but talk to me and treat me as the adult I was and prepare me to make wise choices in marriage. We finished college together +1 kid, now we have 4, and if my kids want to marry young, I hope I have taught them to choose their future spouse using wise principles and to understand marriage requires a lot of hard work and mutual sacrifice.

@Ss-dz6cm 5 месяцев назад

I married my high school sweetheart 1 year after graduation. 26 years married now. We got married mainly because his parents said you're out as soon as you graduate and it was easier with both of our incomes and living together before marriage was not an option. His parents shoved us right into marriage. Don't regret it now, but it hasnt always been easy.

@mybdayis420 5 месяцев назад

Get married when you can support yourself. You want to me married but need Mommy and Daddy’s support? Grow up!

@FTG2Eli 5 месяцев назад

My sister got married at 19 and he was 18. 200+ attended the wedding paid for by parents. My sister left the marriage around 6 years into it, leaving my 4 yr old nephew behind. She needed to explore life by herself. And they were 2 educated, intelligent people (so I thought).

@yosemite735 5 месяцев назад

2 educated, at 19 and he was 18. How many years of college at that point? You are not educated at that age. Intelligent at any age, educated once you have your BA/BS

@christopherdunham2637 5 месяцев назад

So sad. 😢

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

would these 200 people still would have attended the wedding if they knew they would have gotten a divorce?

@MelissaMaiga 5 месяцев назад

I love this Dr. Delony! That young lady will feel so loved and cared for by her father! Such an important message to send!

@parks105 5 месяцев назад

This caller is such a good Dad!

@elizabetha8565 5 месяцев назад

The real sad part are parents that think their children are entitled to their money and have raised their children to think that way.

@cur244 5 месяцев назад

Lots of soft parents out there now that spoil their children and don't make their kids work for anything. Especially true with gen x parents.

@patrickwoolery6000 5 месяцев назад

You’re not wrong. But the neglect that a lot of GenX kids got from our parents made us want to treat our kids better. We tend to go too far the other way, but it is a reaction to not having parents who modeled a good balance.

@lebumjames1373 5 месяцев назад

Lol if you look at the wealthiest and most successful families they all have trust funds/inheritances set up for their kids. Obviously there needs to be a balance but you aren't doing your kids and favors by cutting them off financially lol.

@elizabetha8565 5 месяцев назад

@@lebumjames1373 where did I say cut them off? Also Hunter was a trust fund baby and not all would argue that he has done well in life.

@cur244 5 месяцев назад

@@lebumjames1373 Showing your kids some work ethic is required is a good thing. Paying for everything for kids is a big problem and makes kids entitled and lazy.

@Janelegant 5 месяцев назад

I love this caller. I wish I had a Dad like him. I like the advice Dr. Delony gave too. While the daughter and future son-in-law are very young, there are always exceptions to the rule and I hope they are all able to live happily ever after :)

@steevo8754 5 месяцев назад

I married at 17. I don’t recommend it. No way was i ready

@katiebwheeler 5 месяцев назад

I love all this advice. I was engaged at 18 and married a few months after turning 19. We are over 17 years in, we have a wonderful life and marriage and 4 beautiful children. Mind you I had lived a lot of life in that time, working in high school, losing people very close to me, including my mom who I helped care for as well as helping in a big way with the house over her 4 year battle with cancer. My husband was 3 1/2 years older than me and he had lived on his own paying all his own bills since he was 18 and also lost his mother when he was younger. Dare I say we had experienced a few bumps and bruises from life our parents would have liked to shield us from that left us a bit more mature than many others at the same age... It was hard, we both had a lot of growing up to do, but we both just refused to quit and came out stronger and so much better on the other end. That said the idea of my oldest daughter being engaged in 4 years like I was is terrifying and I have no idea how my parents let me get married so young! lol

@miltoncat 5 месяцев назад

He sounds like a loving and caring dad. I didn’t meet my husband until we were in our 30s. I shudder to think how my life would have turned out if I’d married the guy I was sooooo in love with when I was 18!

@emmaroberts3617 5 месяцев назад

I got married 2 months after turning 18, he was 19. We were married for 7 years before we gor divorced. It was THE HARDEST 7 years of my entire life. We now share a baby, so I am forever attached to the guy I chose at 16, who is not at all the person he was then now, and neither am I. There was no convincing me at 18 that that was a bad idea

@mysterio1570 5 месяцев назад

That was a great episode Dr.D. Best one of the start of 2023.

@lauravd3113 5 месяцев назад

This caller is such a great dad ❤️

@carolyn683 5 месяцев назад

Two of my daughter's got married young. We paid for the modest wedding but no financial support after the wedding. They are both still married and doing well.

@stevengtv 5 месяцев назад

Support them and let them get married! It’s so much easier building together than merging lives later in life. People complain about the drop in marriage rates and how people are getting married “too old” (30+) but then say 18 is too young. Get real.

@rosamaundallen1035 5 месяцев назад

People still need to be prepared. You can’t just go in and “wing it “.

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

Divorce rates decrease as age at time of marriage increases.

@Debora.14 5 месяцев назад

I agree with everyone, this is a very caring father.

@delightschwartz2155 3 дня назад

I got a promise ring and a handmade ring from my highschool sweetheart... I cared for him deeply but I felt deep down that something was under the surface, he wasn't as attracted to me and I felt the relationship wasn't as strong as I wanted. We both had big big angst at our homes... his folks were divorcing and I knew I could not remain at home with my folks any longer... so I broke it off as gently as possible and returned the rings to him, and we tried to go our separate ways. He came out about 10 years later and has been with his partner o er 20 yrs and I'm so glad he found his way in life. I went thru a decade long abusive relationship and didn't marry until 12 yrs later, and we've been together going on 29 yrs. In my case, I think the promise ring meant that we were desperately trying to commit and cling to one another to ride out the coming storms in our respective lives.

@ithinkigottalent4047 5 месяцев назад

I spoke with a longtime friend of mine last night, who I met in college. She started dating her husband when she was 17 years old. We were literally laughing at the fact that he moved to the same college town in order to follow (be with) her. They got engaged when she was 19, and married for 27 years. Three kids and she got her college degree in accounting. She's been in Oil and Gas accounting for over 20 years. It's tough, and they can make it.

@ginnyfromdablock7551 5 месяцев назад

I got married at 18 and my husband was 18 as well and we are still going strong 14 plus years later.

@LOLZHAHANOTFUNNY 5 месяцев назад

My parents slowly handed me the reins of my own financial life between college graduation at 22 and marriage at 23. We had a simple courthouse ceremony and were fully independent by that point. It made money a simple, fun topic in our house. We've now been married almost 5 years and I thank my parents for blessing our marriage, accepting our decision to do it on our own terms, and gracefully handing us the burden of responsibility for our own expenses. It's made for a super fun last 5 years. ❤

@Aztecadr 4 месяца назад

Very interested call. I say as a mom of 3, if they aren't able to pay for their own wedding, they aren't ready to get married. My husband and I paid for ours and did not ask a penny from anyone. As of now, I expect them to save before they embark in such complex lifestyle as a married couple. They can always have a small ceremony if they dont want to pay so much for a wedding as it is expensive.

@Ryan-wx1bi 5 месяцев назад

Sure, a lot of you in the comments are talking about your successful marriage at a young age. The fact is rhe number of divorces substantially increase if you get married below 25.

@joycevalenzuela8495 5 месяцев назад

Exactly

@jaclyngjonaj8855 5 месяцев назад

I would have loved for him to ask the question about their faith and religious background. If they were both raised in the “faith” and practicing Christians, maybe they wanted to get married because they wanted to do the right thing and wait until marriage and I would say that in itself would make them mature enough. The father sounds like a very well rounded balance man which leads me think there is a definite faith background in his family!

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

The Church is a pedophile institution. That in itself would be a horrible reason to justify this marriage

@queenwhatever5217 4 месяца назад

Rushing into marriage just because you wanna have sex does not sound mature to anyone who hasn’t been indoctrinated into that particular religious worldview.

@deannagillett2186 5 месяцев назад

My husband and I married one year out of high school and were married college students for the next 3 years. Got degree and have had 53 yrs of marriage. It will be hard for them as long as they understand they will not have ANY EXTRA money during school and they may live in an apartment above someone’s garage. It can be done but it’s a big commitment 💕

@greatvid4648 5 месяцев назад

I got married at 19. I was already living on my own with a job and we knew we were paying for the wedding ourselve. I really think it depends on the teen. Also my husband could already provide for both of us but I kept working to save for a house. I'm 28 pregnant with our 4th. Other than our home we have no debt and a 4 month savings. We are truly happy and in love. My immaturity did cause problems but we worked though it and I worked hard on it.

@Plooky1969 5 месяцев назад

I married the day after my 18th birthday. It was tough, but we have now been married for 37 years. He was 21 when we got married. I had no doubts, maybe it was naivety, but it’s worked out. All you can do is support her.

@333theeE 5 месяцев назад

Got married at 18 Best thing I ever did highly recommend it

@greenAbbot 5 месяцев назад

I’m glad it worked for you, but you beat the odds. The majority of people who follow your recommendation end up divorced.

@ethan4048 5 месяцев назад

Survivorship biased

@shabnamkarimi3861 5 месяцев назад

Absolutely not… your luckiness does not equate into luckiness for others.

@333theeE 5 месяцев назад

@@shabnamkarimi3861 well I get it A lot of people are really stupid You're either ready to be married at 18 or it 38 some people are just mature and hardworking other people aren't

@333theeE 5 месяцев назад

@@greenAbbot yeah you just have to have good parents have a good head on your shoulder willing to work hard it's not for everybody lot of people are lazy and stupid

@mikeynoels7210 5 месяцев назад

This is a great segment so many of these points apply for anyone trying to get married.

@lisabraun6678 5 месяцев назад

My husband and I got married at 17 and 18. My parents had to sign an authorization form before the wedding. It was a small, cheap ceremony. We had both had jobs since we were 14, had huge responsibilities, been dating for 3 years and our parents grew up in the same town! We've been married for 8 years with baby #3 on the way and I'm more in love with my husband then I've ever been. Not about age, but there has to be a high level of maturity.

@bbclose 5 месяцев назад

Why was it okay to get married at late teens/early 20s in the 40s, 50s, and 60s, but not now? Is it because people aren't becoming full adults until after 25?

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

In the 40s and 50s, most women thought marriage with little possibility of divorce was their only possible path in life so there was no point to discovering who you were individually as a person. Now, women initiate most divorces. Marriage isn't a good idea at any age. Most of the "protections" it provides can be attained through other legal docs that don't put you at huge financial risk like marriage does.

@hwinny2 5 месяцев назад

What a good dad.

@SnowOwlCNY 5 месяцев назад

Wow! This dad has really thought about preparing his daughter and giving sound advice and love. These kids will need a lot of support. It’s really hard to be married, going to college, and working full time. I’ve been there. The reality was it was really hard. A lot of Monday - Friday between college and work 18 hour days and studying on weekends. I had to maintain my scholarships so I could go to college. It was really hard. My wife didn’t realize how difficult college is and the time commitment. She was not happy until after I got the degree and the great job and pay. Great idea about the weekly meetings and books to read.

@loriloristuff 4 месяца назад

This dad is spot on IMO. He's got good instincts. And John's instinct is right as well, particularly setting the stage with the prospective son-in-law.

@Cyanopteryx 5 месяцев назад

First of all, I all bs on "they're not going to have any money going to school full time". I worked, often full time work, while going through college. It's possible and honestly healthy. Also, personally speaking, if I'd married who I thought I wanted to marry when I was 17, my life would be hell. Others may have different experiences, but the odds are not in their favor.

@volmania5329 5 месяцев назад

Let them get married. The modern idea that you have to wait until you're almost 30 to get married is insane.

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

I've never heard anyone say you have to wait until you're 30. That being said, those who marry in their 30s have lower divorce rates than those who marry before 30.

@privacyplease1556 5 месяцев назад

There’s a lot of ground between “just turned 17” and married at 30. In fact, there are 13 WHOLE YEARS of middle ground.

@richie824 5 месяцев назад

We were married at 19, now 44 + 4 kids and an awesome marriage. It can work however we were both very mature for our age.

@eternalperspective4136 5 месяцев назад

My husband and I got married at 19 28 years ago. We have grown up together and grown closer. Time goes by so fast. I am so glad we've had all this time to start young and build a life together. Of course people have to be mature and committed enough to make it work and our mutual faith beliefs has been instrumental for us in this, but marrying young, under the right circumstances, can be a very beautiful thing.

@FTG2Eli 5 месяцев назад

More young people should be listening to this episode. To hear how transparent this father is regarding his daughter and getting this advice from John, heck, the whole conversation, should be eye opening to those that are thinking about getting married young.

@kimberlynielsen6485 5 месяцев назад

It's better than them living together! I got married at 19 he was 18 and have been married for 41 years!❤

@greenAbbot 5 месяцев назад

I loved living together before marriage. It was definitely the right decision for us.

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

Why is it better than them living together?

@fishtail1129 5 месяцев назад

If they still need financial support they are not ready to get married. No staying in mom and dad’s car insurance, cellphone, etc. Do they both plan to work enough to pay for an apartment and living expenses? If not, they are not ready. If they think they can play house on your dime, nope.

@sherridevries9144 5 месяцев назад

My son and daughter n law got married at 18. Both responsible with money and alignment on many aspects . So far it's almost been 2 years 🎉❤ so far doing great 🙏 ( both never wanted to attend college )

@derekstamper362 5 месяцев назад

Can’t smoke or drink till 21 but can get married at 18 😂!

@reginasemenenko148 5 месяцев назад

Doesn't make sense.

@sobeliever1638 5 месяцев назад

How is this the same thing, even a 12 year old know smoking messes up your lungs. If you smoke you are not mature at any age, but you need maturity for marriage.

@rosannacudmore2049 5 месяцев назад

Being married young and all the way through college was the best thing we did. We got to plan our future from the beginning. Three kids, successful businesses, and 27 years together has been a crazy ride!

@heatherp4504 5 месяцев назад

as someone that got married at 18 and is 6 years in, it will be incredibly hard, but if you love that person and willing to commit to a life with them, then go for it. but you need a lot of tools in your tool bag to make it work. i’m learning that now. kids change things too!!!

@twylaboehmer9676 5 месяцев назад

My daughter is the same way. She just turned 18 and so did her boyfriend of 3 years. Thankfully her boyfriend wants to wait for a few more years before getting married. We made a deal with them was that they had to be on birth control. To be sure there was no whoops your a grandma. I am thankful that my daughter feels safe enough to talk through things with me. I also am thankful for the ability to be able to talk to her boyfriend. The toughest part has been we have very different values from his family. So it's been a tough conversation.

@Sweetgrassgiraffe 5 месяцев назад

Christian parents: don’t have sex until you’re married Also Christian parents: you’re not ready to be married Who’s fault is that? Parents don’t prepare their children for one of the most important human relationships they will ever have and then they tell their kids they aren’t ready or prepared.

@greenAbbot 5 месяцев назад

Those aren’t universal views among Christians, but I do agree that the people I knew who got married too young or too quickly did it because they really wanted to have sex and they believed that meant they had to get married immediately.

@sarahalderman3126 5 месяцев назад

Yes, but hun reality is just reality.

@thorneto2742 5 месяцев назад

I don’t see the point in getting married at 18. Me and my wife started dating at 15 but didn’t get married until we were 28. It didn’t really change anything anyways.

@alqoshgirl 5 месяцев назад

Lol as if that’s normal. 28? What in the world. Living in sin, acting married for years is somehow normal 🙄

@thorneto2742 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirl We are atheists, we don’t really subscribe to the whole sin thing. I guess if you are religious then getting married early makes more sense. It also might make sense if you plan to have kids but we’re 35 now and still haven’t tried for one so that wasn’t really a factor for us.

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

@@alqoshgirlthere's no such thing as "acting married." It's a legal status; that's it and that's all.

@ineedhoez 5 месяцев назад

This was such a good call. I don't have any kids but this makes me want to have some.

@endless_summer_rose 4 месяца назад

You are a good father. They have to feel the responsibility too though. You are doing great!

@whatintheheck4692 5 месяцев назад

You can throw a beautiful wedding for $5k-$7. My first wedding in 2004, we did with a budget of $1000. My second wedding in 2009, I indulged in things that weren’t necessary but still only spent $4000. You don’t need a “Pinterest perfect” wedding, especially if you can’t afford it. It’s ONE day and you probably won’t remember half it.

@evangelineellington9240 5 месяцев назад

I agree you don’t need a “Pinterest perfect wedding” but in this day and age 5-7k does not get you far with a wedding unless you only have a few guests and do not have a meal. Prices are much, much higher than they were in 2009. Where I am located catering was in the 5-7K price range for a guest count of 170 and that was one of the cheapest options! I do think you need to evaluate your financial situation and plan accordingly though.

@whatintheheck4692 5 месяцев назад

@@evangelineellington9240 I reserved a church gymnasium for free and bought 30lbs of pork shoulder and we made pulled pork sandwiches. Other families pitched in with sides. Meals don’t need to be catered.

@evangelineellington9240 5 месяцев назад

⁠@@whatintheheck4692Good for you hun! We were happy to provide a meal for our family and friends. To each their own and to each what can fit into their means and what you are willing and able to give.

@boston312 5 месяцев назад

how many wedding did you have? What do you say when they ask you to repeat "till death do us part"? Do you and your husband just skip that part?

@auemmjee 5 месяцев назад

@@boston312😂😂😂

@jennifermohrhaus2913 5 месяцев назад

Married at 19 Hubby was 28. Engaged at 6 weeks, married in 6 months. He had a steady job, house, insurance. 22+ years later with 6 kids. I guess it worked out.

@JetADR 5 месяцев назад

I agree with the Approach of Ramp up the Training. It is good for the daughter to have a healthy support system beyond the family, having a church group or other community of healthy successful young ladies to help her with life. She needs to learn how to be off on her own and make decisions and choices for herself in how to set up an apartment. Going from parents house to boyfriend/husband's house alot of time the woman will just conform to what the man wants. It is just good practice for both the guy and the girl to live life on their own with a roommate, go to school, work etc. He needs to Have a career to support the Family. There is a lot of growing up that college and being out on your own does to someone.

@krystenburkhardt-hansyn 4 месяца назад

I think Dr. Deloney’s advice is very good. I especially like the part that he says where his future son-in-law should show up to meet with him at least once a week. These kids think that they’re gonna play house and get a full ride scholarship and get a marriage, and have everyone pay for themand it’s amazing to me that they have the guts to even bring it out loud. But I would meet them every step of the way with real life expectations.

@foxxybrown291 5 месяцев назад

My 2nd born son was 16 when he slowly left home to live with his girlfriend and her mother (we live in England that’s kinda normal and I left home at 16 in the 90s married at 20 with first baby) and now he has 2 girls and he’s a chef in their first home and doing really well. Now he’s brother who’s 22 and a chef at the same place, I don’t feel could leave home now 😅 he’s a incredible young man but way too laid back and forgetful 😂😂😂my eldest daughter is me and I am proud of them all. xx

@EadsB7002 5 месяцев назад

A definite no. Things are so much different now than they were even 20-30 years ago... it's much much harder climate now for marriages, let alone ones where one or both individuals' frontal lobes aren't even fully developed. I watched my cousin marry at 18 (30 years ago) someone her dad seemingly "pushed" her to marry....and of course it didn't end well. With no college degree, she is still barely scraping by since the split. It's just so awful. Please don't let your children make this mistake.

@leandramcphatter8957 5 месяцев назад

I wholeheartedly believe if my dad were of sound mind (he had/has dementia), he wouldn't have let me marry my ex. He was nowhere near ready. In some ways, I wasn't ready either. This is so good that this girl had such an amazing father asking the right questions to protect her. I truly envy that. Good for them! I

@mewgiah8057 4 месяца назад

I think it depends on the situation. I married my wife after only being with her 2 months. So we had met online and were long distance but after being 2 months together in person I decided to marry her. On paper this was an insane decision. We’ve now been happily married 10 years. The reason I married her is because we connected on a deep level and had become best friends. We both were a perfect match physically. And most importantly she shared the same values as me. Specifically I don’t like to drink or party. I’m more socially conservative and my wife was the exact same way. So even though I technically rushed into marriage on paper, I just knew she was the one. It was actually more so we couldn’t stand being apart anymore. It was too painful not being together. So the move to be married was actually a necessity. All that said I do not think this kid should get married. The issue isn’t his age or lack of experience. Because again I believe it’s possible to meet the right person at any age. The issue is all the red flags that show this relationship isn’t the perfect union he believes. The fact that she won’t pay her own insurance among other things tells me she isn’t ready for marriage and this guy also needs to spend more time with her to see if this relationship can stand the test of time.

@amataratsu006 4 месяца назад

I'd rather my daughter wanting to be married than choosing onlyfans

@aftercommonera 5 месяцев назад

Contrary to popular belief marriage was actually designed for young people!

@Eric_Bassett 5 месяцев назад

Yes, but the worlds changed. An 18 year old man with no money or job heading off to college does not yet have the resources to take care of a wife.

@Allthekingshorses2 5 месяцев назад

I wonder what the statistics reveal about the success rate?

@aftercommonera 5 месяцев назад

@@Eric_Bassett Most people in their 20s and 30s don't have the resources to take care of a wife either though! They're in massive debt and still trying to figure life out. If it was about having resources then most men shouldn't even think about marriage until 40+. It's better to go ahead and get in alignment then to play married until you think you're "ready"

@ethan4048 5 месяцев назад

Marriage was actually designed for bringing families together for increased resources, children, and the woman becoming the man's property.

@Jeminiw1969 4 месяца назад

My parents made it clear from a younger age (before high school) that once my sister and I were married they expected us to be financially independent. If we got married we would need to support ourselves 100% from that point forward. Yes - they wanted us to get our college degrees; however, they would not have given us any financial support during our college years if either of us had gotten married before we graduated.

@Itsoperated 4 месяца назад

What I would do which is what I want to do when my kids get older is have them “pay bills” don’t tell them what your doing but let’s say car payment and insurance save it put it in another account and when they move out all they money they paid to you give it to them to help them once they moved out. They showed they had the right mind set to do it so reward them.