Relationships with Enneagram 7s

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Here are the five key themes to know about relationships with Enneagram Type Seven Enthusiasts. These themes span the entire spectrum of healthy vs unhealthy 7s, so BE WARNED! These episodes contain more critical commentary than your average enneagram content on social media as I believe that's the heart of the enneagram's purpose (i.e. self-critical reflection that leads to true self-acceptance, healing, and personal growth). It's also not a one-size-fits all episode, so some of this should not resonate with everyone, especially in the higher levels of health. Lastly, if you want to go deeper into the theories around the type seven personality, check out the videos linked below 👇
0:00 Intro
0:44 Flow
3:11 Freedom
5:33 Anticipation
7:40 Confidence
10:00 Commitment
12:00 Bonus
▶ TYPE 7 COMPLETE GUIDE: • Enneagram Type 7s Expl...
▶ Type 7 Childhood: • Enneagram Type 7 Enthu...
▶ Type 7 Wings: • Enneagram Wings for Ty...
▶ Type 7 Triads: • Enneagram Triads for T...
▶ Type 7 Instincts: • Instincts for Enneagra...
▶ ENNEAGRAM RELATIONSHIPS ❤️
Type 1 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 2 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 3 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 4 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 5 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 6 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 7 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 8 • Relationships with Enn...
Type 9 • Relationships with Enn...
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#enneagram #relationships #enneagram7 #selfawareness #spirituality #selfhelp #motivation #selflove #wisdom #spiritualgrowth #personalitytypes #personality #enneagramtypes #enneagramtypes #enneagram7w8 #enneagram7w6 #love #dating #marriage #relationshipadvice #relationshipgoals #relationshipsuccess #extrovert
-Written by Colton Simmons but with all due credit to the Don Riso & Russ Hudson of the Enneagram Institute and their many books for the majority of the insight contained in this video, as well as Richard Rohr, Helen Palmer, Claudio Naranjo, and many more inspirational enneagram minds!

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13 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 117

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Thanks for watching and subscribing folks! This relationship series has been lengthy labor of love (pun intended) so it really means a lot to see your response both here in the comments, and through liking + subscribing 🙌

@user-ii7bs6bb7k 11 месяцев назад

Do u got discord

@yuntsaong-blackburn5104 5 месяцев назад

7 here also. My gosh. What strikes me the most is this validation of the feeling of deep deep loneliness, since childhood...and the denial of this feeling by constant stimulation, desires, and living in anticipation rather than being present. Also, what resonates is the constant shifting of - not core values - but interests, priorities, and the resistance to tranquility. My life has been a non stop roller coaster, and I loved the highs. Now I am learning to slow down, accept to feel the feelings, and also accept to reach out for help and acknowledge my weaknesses without always numbing or distracting myself, or running away towards my own gratification and false sense of freedom. NATURE is key, when i go hiking, diving, climbing, this perpetual seeking and wanting goes away, leaving place to PEACE. Which is what all 7s really need ❤

@YouveGotaType 5 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing, and best wishes on the continued journey of personal growth & healing 🙏

@chicagowren Год назад

7 here! You are correct on the love language. If I don't have someone sharing in the joy then I'm put off by them. Wet diapers don't work for me😂

@YouveGotaType Год назад

haha thanks for sharing!

@meganowen2101 6 месяцев назад

Married to a 7, and it’s been a wild ride! Lived on 3 different continents and I’m sure there’s more adventure to come.

@YouveGotaType 6 месяцев назад

Sounds about right! And what's your enneagram type?

@riri1718 3 месяца назад

"No choice should ever have to be a permanent choice " this explains why I haven't gotten a tattoo yet after so many years of consideration 😅

@YouveGotaType 3 месяца назад

haha makes sense

@MiaBroomerCurls 7 месяцев назад

I'm an intergrated type 7 but in childhood (and some days now especially in my current career) act like type 5 which i score second highest in.. As a Type 7; words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service and physical touch are for me :) I definitely closed doors on people who I felt their energy etc was not positive or healthy enough to my standard or compatible to mine, that is so important to me in dating and relationships. I use to be like a people-holic with unsatiable curiosity and doing everything I wanted in my imagination and traveling but becoming a mom really helped me to slow down, mature more and focus on what I needed to do to grow.

@YouveGotaType 7 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing 🙌 and glad to hear you're enjoying the vids!

@RebeccaJensenRunBosco 10 месяцев назад

As a 7 I highly value quality time with my friends. I don’t actually want to just sit and chit chat much- I want to get together and DO the fun thing that makes me feel bonded to people. From my partner, I enjoy tons of cuddly or playful physical touch. Next, my materialistic tendencies benefit from gifts. Whatever obsession I’m currently on- please get me more of it! Acts of service are great if they enable me to keep doing what I want. I’d rank words of affirmation last, as I’m too confident or independent to need anyone’s validation, haha. Although I get tons from my partner, so it may be something I take for granted and wouldn’t know what to do without. So maybe it’s secretly #1.

@YouveGotaType 10 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing all that! Love that you mentioned gifts - as I feel like most people wont admit they do value them as a love language. I don't think it's always materialistic :) sometimes we just want a tangible sign/product of someone's value & appreciation for us.

@rycroftphilostratem3536 2 месяца назад

I totally relate lol

@jessebustos7549 Год назад

I appreciate the insight and advice you have for loving a 7. My sweetheart is a 7 and I’m a 5, and while we’re very different we challenge each other to grow a lot. Your video affirms what I know and love about him, so thank you ❤️ Would you consider a series about how each type might interact with other types, e.g. areas to learn from each other, areas of confusion, areas of strength?

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Love to hear it! And yes, that’s already in the queue. Just taking a long time to do all 36 type combos 😬

@binablob 11 месяцев назад

this is one of the best enneagram channel ever, its scary bcus everything you said is veryy accurate haha! im a social 7!

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

Thanks so much!

@estelborssa7170 6 месяцев назад

I’m a 7, my love languages are physical touch, quality time and words of affirmation. All 3 very strong for me!

@YouveGotaType 6 месяцев назад

A three way tie?! How very 7-esque ;)

@helahreljac1523 6 месяцев назад

On my list most cherished is quality time infused with a lot of sexual tension and physical enjoyment.. words of affirmations as a part of general atmosphere are necessity. Presents are far less important, preferably practical in nature (example- a new lamp if I need one yet it needs to be matching with the environment and my vision, not some random lamp) as material possessions require a lot of cleaning and organising. I believe I'm quite stable 7 with both wings equally distributed and with all instincts somehow balanced, depending on situation.

@YouveGotaType 6 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing 🙌

@brookeisloom 16 дней назад

yes! this resonates very much

@zcargirl77 Год назад

Great video! I’m a hardcore 7 and all of this resonates. I feel called out. LOL

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Haha that's the classic enneagram experience! (feeling called out, that is)

@maryosgood9933 9 месяцев назад

Very good to include love languages as they can truly make or break relationships.

@YouveGotaType 9 месяцев назад

🙌

@lady_icarus Год назад

Woooo! Definitely see one of my best friends in this explanation! Love it! I used to take it personally when his priorities shifted, but I learned there is no malice in it and just something he is used to and working on. This video is truly helpful!!! Thanks again! 💕

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Glad you enjoyed it!!

@user-lp1wf4ot4x Год назад

Came here as a 7 to answer your love languages question: mine are 1) quality time, 2) words of affirmation 3) Physical touch at the beginning of a relationship, and then swap 2 and 3 in an established relationship. Thanks, by the way. I definitely felt seen. I truly don’t like negative emotions: I have a mental vault, that I imagine throwing all the bad stuff into, and ceremonially locking the door. But, I’m generally not afraid of boredom. I’m never bored, because I can always imagine up something to do, or think about or plan. I’m only afraid of being bored when I am obliged to participate in someone else’s plan, that I didn’t have input in…and if the plan involves my participation for more than a few days.

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Thanks for sharing all this! And so glad to hear it makes ya feel seen 🙌

@jelanidrummond7178 11 месяцев назад

I really enjoyed this video. It shocked me by showing me the many ways I’ve grown since starting my journey of understanding my type and myself. I’m a 7w6 and my top love language is quality time and words of affirmation are at the very bottom. I’ve never really cared about praise but if we can spend time hanging out or just chatting I feel very fulfilled.

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

Good stuff, thanks for sharing!

@daveveloz 7 месяцев назад

7 here. Dude you nailed this. Also, total acts of service over here!

@YouveGotaType 7 месяцев назад

Love to hear it! And thanks for sharing the LL

@daveveloz 7 месяцев назад

@@YouveGotaType For sure. Your video content is thorough and well communicated. Big fan, keep up the good work!

23 дня назад

I am anxiously waiting for the 4&7 relationship

@YouveGotaType 22 дня назад

Coming real soon

@alexanderbialonowicz5770 Год назад

Very helpful! I like how structural you are in your presentations and the way you deliver it !

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Thanks much!

@MajorieRoyal Год назад

I'm a 7 social introverted so I have spent a lot of time spending this looking in the better future inside of myself and into a growth path. My goal was to find inner freedom. I wanted to be more free than what controlled me from inside. I am actually quite into talking about the things and emotions but obviously it needs to be in a sense of opening, freedom to be ourselves and mainly with a positive Outlook. Negativity, being stuck in a concept and anger is not what I like when doing that soul searching. I wonder if the childhood trauma could affect us that way as 7. I'm more about others than myself. Although, when I decide to leave I usually don't think about how other feels.. I move country. Thanks for the video

@MajorieRoyal Год назад

My love language is quality time and words of affirmation ahah

@aridmcb Год назад

Excellent! There were actually a few moments where you quoted verbatim certain phrases that routinely tumble out of my bff 7's mouth :)

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Glad to hear it felt so accurate!

@curtisharrington858 10 месяцев назад

Spectacular videos man!

@YouveGotaType 10 месяцев назад

Thanks so much!

@wholly_power_productions 3 месяца назад

Thank you for this great breakdown of sevens. I am a seven, and my love language is touch. Especially making love -- because it feels good, and being a seven, I like what feels good 😅

@YouveGotaType 3 месяца назад

Thanks for sharing, and makes sense ;)

@wowreally6111 10 дней назад

my prefered love language as a 7 is definitely quality time. time with people fulfills me. i almost never think of or even care about giving/recieving gifts or service. in my mind, people are responsible for their own lives. no one owes anyone anything. however, i try to do more of these so i become more well-rounded.

@YouveGotaType 5 дней назад

Thanks for sharing! Definitely sounds like a strong social instinct then.

@MatthewEaton Год назад

Man, this hit my negativity locations (5w4 here) and described a former friend at the same time. It also explained why we clicked so much so long ago and why I have changed and he really hasn't. Thank you for shedding some light there, I appreciate it. Who would have thought? I guess the thing is to slow down. I suppose going 101 mph instead of 100 mph is part of-- What? WHAT? Oh, okay. Fine, I'll just go 100.5 mph... Who says I can't compromise!

@imanishimwejanviere5766 2 месяца назад

As a 7 you are right to the point on everything. I love youuuuu

@spicylavender 8 месяцев назад

omg sooo right abt this 7. gemini...love languages is words of affirmation, quality time and physical touch...

@YouveGotaType 8 месяцев назад

🙌

@Aviebaybe 9 месяцев назад

as a 7, my love languages are words of affirmation, physical touch, and quality time in that order

@YouveGotaType 9 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing!

@jerrysstories711 Год назад

I love the way you connect the dots in these videos. I wondered, have you come across the "Objects Relations" triads? It doesn't seem popular with Enneagram experts, and it's pretty deep in Freudian jargon. But I ask because the externalizing, impinged, and internalizing types in the heart/mind/gut triad correspond exactly to the Rejection, Attachment, and Frustration triads in Object Relations triads. What's the significance of that parallel? And thanks again for these great vids!

@YouveGotaType Год назад

I explore object relations in my Childhood videos without explicitly saying it. People are more familiar with "Attachment Theory" these days so lean that direction just so it's as approachable, yet grounded as possible. Russ Hudson of the enneagram institute teaches explicitly on Object Relations if you want to dive into his excellent work!

@meganh7872 9 месяцев назад

Touch is no. 1, Time no. 2, and Words no. 3.

@YouveGotaType 9 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing!

@user-ii7bs6bb7k 11 месяцев назад

All of these were cripplingly true

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

🙌

@HLTrds 2 месяца назад

Quality “play” time!!!

@kathrinethalund4729 11 месяцев назад

I think I am the counter phobic social 7. And I have sacrificed a lot in my life. I went down stress few months ago as a social worker and when I am in relationships I a have focused to much of my partner needs and not my own. I still have a lot of the characteristics of a 7, but also of a 2. It can be difficult for me to know what advice to take around being a 7. I think it is overlooked how much sacrifices the social 7 can do. Just like the social 9 is not lazy, but can be a workaholic and the sexual 6 can be aggressive. I hope it is okay I am so direct, and I do really enjoy your videos🙏

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

Glad you enjoyed the videos! It's important to note however, that there is no classification of counterphobic or phobic 7s - that is a unique analysis of the type 6's core struggle with fear (phobic & counterphobic reactions). This self-analysis sounds far more like a 6 wing 7. And I did mention how social 7s can do many good things for others, but with the caveat that they consider how it will impact them/their freedom/their joy.

@kathrinethalund4729 11 месяцев назад

Sorry, I did mean countertype, not counterphobic🙈 Interesting - do you think that I sound like a 6? Because I am in doubt all the time if I have the correct type. Do you do typing sessions?

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

@@kathrinethalund4729 Oh gotchya! I'm hesitant to about confirming your type via only a few RU-vid comments, but it certainly seems like you could be another type. Yep, I do typing sessions (if you want to schedule one, got to youvegotatype.com/contact and I'll follow up with you :)

@kathrinethalund4729 11 месяцев назад

Haha😄 Yeah maybe I am! I send you a message.

@riri1718 3 месяца назад

My love languages as a 7: 1. Physical touch 2. Quality time + gifts 4. words of affirmation 5. acts of service

@YouveGotaType 3 месяца назад

Thanks for sharing!

@skribbleskills Год назад

I’m a 7 that made it all the way to the end! Haha … fav line from this one “no means no and yes means mmm maybe” … unfortunately that resonates 🤣. But I’m doin my best over here okay! (Quality time top love language FO sho)

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Lol love it! Thanks for sharing your LL too!

@cassandrawong5590 3 месяца назад

I am a 7 and this is pretty accurate, sadly as I am with a 5 who is struggling. I should say we are both in a ‘winter’ blizzard season

@YouveGotaType 3 месяца назад

Hmm well it's not uncommon to bond with people that are our disintegration type. Hope the winter is a good learning lesson at least - as the hard times are usually more transformational than the good times

@user-ii7bs6bb7k 11 месяцев назад

Perfered love lang is quality time. Words or affirmation has to be done so so subtly . If its open flattery it feels fake and or ill look down on you unconsiously because it comes off as a simp and it affirms my alr high self esteem. I like gift giving i could care less about getting them. I like physical touch, its pretty high up there. But dont care as much about sex itself

@YouveGotaType 11 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing your LLs!

@CreCravings 7 месяцев назад

I’m a 7 and yes words of affirmation is golden!!!

@YouveGotaType 7 месяцев назад

🙌

@aiyshaazula3770 6 месяцев назад

Wow sums me up perfectly

@YouveGotaType 6 месяцев назад

Glad it was an accurate viewing experience ;)

@Minato-up2nq 19 дней назад

spot on

@YouveGotaType 19 дней назад

🎯

@user-dk7zh5qx1c 4 месяца назад

7- words of affirmation- most def

@YouveGotaType 4 месяца назад

Thanks for sharing 🙌

@shatoyapatrice2661 7 месяцев назад

7 here they’re all my love languages - gluttony 😂

@YouveGotaType 7 месяцев назад

Haha thanks for sharing ;)

@purrmaid9056 6 месяцев назад

"The first thing you should know about me: my ego believes the world exists solely for my pleasure." That's going on my dating profile.

@YouveGotaType 6 месяцев назад

hahaha that'll draw in some fun matches ;)

@meganh7872 9 месяцев назад

Amazing

@YouveGotaType 9 месяцев назад

🙌

@tashonntrennwhite Год назад

My ex and mother of my child is a type 7w8. Self-preservation type 7. Her top love language was acts of service then quality time. I'm a sexual 9w8. My love languages are physical touch and then words of affirmation.

@YouveGotaType Год назад

Thanks for sharing 🙌

@HumanAki 4 месяца назад

Watching this, as a 7, is both incredibly invasive and enlightening! 🤣🤣🤣 I feel like I've been stripped down to my birthday suit in the town square for all to admire this flawed, yet handsome, caramel piece of ass! 😆 Pretty spot on analysis for me for the most part! 2-4 things where off/didn't apply to myself, including Words of Affirmation beating Quality Time and Physical Touch as the #1 Spot! BUT(T), again, the fact that I can be reduced to a nifty checklist is, honestly, kinda awesome! 😁 Thank you for doing this! P.S. The gratitude tidbit is an absolute game changer, and I'm speaking from firsthand experience! 😁

@YouveGotaType 4 месяца назад

hahaha well that's one of the best descriptions of the enneagram experience I've ever heard. Glad you enjoyed it - albeit a vulnerable sort of enjoyment! And thanks for sharing what does/doesn't exactly resonate.