I met and married while still in my teens. I explained it to my wife like this. "Women don't understand men's language. They say you look nice, it means I want sex. They say you did a good job, it means I want sex. They say we can be friends, it means I'm patiently waiting to have sex." There is almost NEVER a situation where a man is not willing to have sex if offered.
@@PayNoTax-GetNoVote You've obviously never watched any social experiments when hot girls go around asking random guys to hook up. Most of them say no, by the way.
I generally agree with this video. Although I do think that in very rare cases, men and women can be friends. For example, the guy doesn't want to bang her because she's ugly and he's able to easily attract prettier girls. And she doesn't want to bang him because she's very picky and even unattractive women can bed pretty attractive guys nowadays. Alternatively, one or both of them already are in very fulfilling relationships already.
@@lightworker2956 I had a female best friend at work where it was genuine friendship. She was around 2 years older than me, although normally it doesn't matter much; but in our case mentally she was much more mature compared to me, which is probably why I never felt attracted towards her because we weren't at the same maturity level. She used to help me out A LOT at stuff that stuff I was bad at like social interactions and she spoke really confidently to her superiors and encouraged me to do the same. Which is why I felt like she's more like a big sister to me than anything else because of how she helped me like a caring big sis. Although we never said this to each other I think it was mutually same from both sides. Besides, she was already in a committed relationship and it never made me feel jealous or threatened. Tho I agree 90% of the time when I am talking to a girl, I hope to date her but this was one of the times I didn't.
Incorrect. Men and women can be friends. I have female friends. We're all heterosexual. We don't see each other as a pair or do anything romantic, sexual, but we connect very well because we have a lot in common. We hang out, watch movies, play video games together, share memes and go to restaurants or shopping even sometimes when we feel extra-social. This includes my ex's. Some of my female ex's are also my friends. People also believe every relationship has to end in a toxic way, or involve some kind of avoidance in the future. I had ex's like that and what I've learned, is that this happens to desperate people who have little to no standards. They don't understand themselves much. These are manchildren and whores who just want almost any relationship or just want to get into as many skirts as possible. Be yourself, be down to earth, you'll have opposite sex friends.
@@j99044 Except having a man and woman who aren't attracted to one another but enjoy each other's company is not a "very rare" occurrence. Going to a college and asking the attractive girls if they have guys they keep as friends who'd want to be with them is far from establishing a universal truth.
@@Nikola-vs6fdThat's why they didn't say men and women can't be brothers and sisters. And in that case, there's a kind of mental automation that makes it impossible and prevents the physical sexual attraction. Because 'you're a or like a sister to me' But for friends, that attraction can't be prevented or removed.
For women, contempt is an art form. Who could say a thing like this and not be a true artist?: "Men should be like Kleenex. Soft, strong, and disposable." -Cher
Yeah men are ballsy enough to tell you what they think to your face. Meanwhile when the women were finally about to admit the truth they turn and walk away hahaha
@@RafaelBelvedereseNotice how all the women answered yes while knowing their guy friends would hook up with them given the chance? That’s a blatant disregard for another person’s feelings for self gratification. That’s PRECISELY what cheating is. Every single one of them given the right alignment of circumstances would cheat on their bf because they already have the cheating mentality even though they deny it. Trusting someone is what YOU do, not what THEY do, therefore it has no bearing on whether or not they will cheat.
You can TOTALLY be friends. My best friend in college was a girl. We have 5 kids now. Its been updated to 5 kids since I made this comment a couple of years ago. The friendship continues.
My (now ex) husband has a close female friend and I never felt threatened by her. They were friends long before we met and he considered her to be “one of the boys” so he didn’t consider her to be a potential date. She is attractive and had no problem attracting men but my ex just wasn’t into her like that. I figured that they’d known each other for so long that if they were going to hook up, it would have already happened. ETA that we are not together for many reasons but she is not one of them.
ladydontekno Right??? All these people who can’t be just friends with the opposite sex are kinda silly. I’m friends with a lot of guys and they don’t have crushes on me. They know I’m taken and view me as a sister.
Lightbringer That’s so stupid. I have plenty male friends who don’t have sexual interest in me. It’s called being friends because we are ride or dies, family. Something you should learn sometime. We are not all slaves to our sexual urges like you.
This was from the time before Instagram and the attention economy for visual attention became a thing and beauty became an arms race. Just facebook, text-only twitter and maybe myspace.
@@MR-nl8xr It's literally their survival tactic and baked into their genes. It's like asking why a car salesman won't tell you how shitty his cars are.
This is so not true. I'm male and most of my closest friends are female... I am not attracted to any of them though. I've been clear right from the start with girls I'm into so they know how I feel. I can also be just friends with a girl I am attracted to. I think the guys in this video indicated the opposite because of cultural influence. It's ridiculous that I have to say this, but men don't want to do the sideways hula with every woman they see.
@@Cantersoft stfu youre probably 21 and youll change your outlook eventually. The girls you are friends with who you are not attracted to are attracted to you. It goes both ways nibba.
@@Cantersoft I do agree with the last statement you made but still i disagree with your overall statement of Men and women can be friends. THIS also depends on what you define as friends, if you mean hanging out together sleep on same bed like we do with guy friends etc... Then Big No, if you mean just like acquaintance, then yeah. The thing is yes men don't want to sleep with every woman they see on the street but the likely hood he Wil become attracted to a woman he spends a lot of time with is very high same as for women but not as high. Men are actually more likely to be attracted to a woman they spend more time with. Etc...
@@Cantersoft You see, you start to lie and put words in my mouth, this shows your dishonesty towards this situation. I literally said "I agreed with your last statement" then I added "it depends on what friends mean" and I said if "they were like acquaintances" then no problem and I also explained that "if you hang out and do stuff like men usually do together (sleep together in same bed or room, play video games do crazy stuff together) then no it's impossible because the more you spend time with the opposite sex (if you are straight) the more likely you'll be attracted to them. But for some reason all you got from my comment was "i can't think outside of sex when there is a woman around". You must be a dishonest person and I advise you stop being dishonest and stop lying to yourself either. Thank you.
Also No sight of people digging their heads into cell phones. People clearly seemed more happy & had glowing faces due to being exposed hardly to any social media.
Man this isn't true. I did two tours in Afghanistan and we had a "cultural liason" officer with us, who was basically a woman we brought along to talk to the Muslim women who wouldn't talk to us. She trained hard and was a better soldier than the average dude. Anyway, IED took out my MRAP and knocked me out. I came to with her fighting off tangos single-handedly. She saved my life. We're good friends and I know and respect her husband, I'd never try to get with her. She's smoking hot, I won't deny that, but she's off-limits in my mind and I'd never cross the friendship boundary even if she wanted to. Maybe in another life, if we were both single, of course I'd consider dating her, but that life is not this life. I'm happy to have her as a friend, known her for 20 years and consider her one of my best friends.
@@sweetsour6783lol bro u just admitted u would have a thing for her if not for your current relationships...you also barely see her enough to consider her a friend so doesn't count anyway.
@@sweetsour6783 would you go out to a movie with her alone? do you think thatd be appropriate? would you be fine with your wife having a male friend for 20 years just because they worked together for a short time? and going out alone? obviously not, so its not a real friendship, just an acquaintance.
@@sweetsour6783 great story man, I agree that it’s possible to respect the opposite sex as a friend. Just when you get past that young relentlessly horny phase. But I’d admit that I don’t think most guys actually do. I trust myself but not many others to have the same mindset.
@@thetrax3482 I have a strong feeling women DO get this, but they also understand that they can manipulate men into doing various things for them, so they act like it's all about friendship. It's like a person caught speeding... Very few people out there will admit to speeding... it always turns into "WHATT???? I was speeding????? Oh I'm so sorry I didn't realize" People when caught in an uncomfortable situation try to nope out with an excuse, and playing dumb is usually the first one people go to because it's easy. There's a reason that girl just walked away instead of saying anything. She knew the facade was over in that moment.
@KingOfShenaniganthia it's possible but what's the likelihood of it? Guys need sex like women need emotional intimacy. It's make sense that it would be harder for a guy to be friends with a girl than a girl to be friends with a guy. He gives her the emotional intimacy she needs by just being her friend. A girl would have to be MORE than just a friend to give him what he wants. See how that works?
The dude spitting facts while eating the sandwich is philosophical gold. He doesn't bother to stop eating because the answer to the question is so self-evident it needs no pause for reflection.
What planet are these kids from. How have these guys gone through life believing that guys have absolutely no control over their emotions and if you attracted to a girl you just completely caveman it and could not possibly become anything other than a object for sexual gratification. Are these kids real?
The emphasis on the phrase: "just friends" means that the interviewer was specifically asking about platonic friendships... Not "romantic friends" if that means anything...
Now, for real. After contemplating the video and watching it several times, and thinking about my past, I have to agree to 90% of what was shown in this video. I mean, ALL the female friends I had, I mostly liked them because of that the sandwich man said, physical attraction, the others that werent that attractive to me were easier to be just friends. And other example is, that when I KNOW that a girl has a BF, all the attraction I had for her vanishes. SO if BOTH are ALONE its kinda HARD AND IMPOSSIBLE to NOT have physical attraction from the MAN side to the woman. But if BOTH are already engaged, I see that its easier to be just friends, Unless ONE of them is weird and wants to do bad stuff. TLDR: Man and woman can be friends more easily if one is already engaged or there's less physical attraction, the sad truth of being human. Have a great day, evening, night!!
simply because of context i think he refers to cheating. why would 2 people who are engaged (not to each other) suddenly sleep with each other just because one of them is beating their woman/man?
I genuinely hope you're a teen if you have that mindset. "SO if BOTH are ALONE its kinda HARD AND IMPOSSIBLE to NOT have physical attraction from the MAN side to the woman". Fucking hilarious... 🤣
We were friends with a girl in high school that none of us wanted to have sex with. Not because she wasn’t drop-dead gorgeous, but because she was so incredibly innocent and childlike. It’s weird, because all of us just wanted to protect her! She never dated anyone either. After high school, we found out that she started dating some church guy, who looked incredibly virginal. We figured they were perfect together.
Its interesting seeing this video pop up in my recommendations years later, and to see so many people responding recently agreeing. Im in college right now and I have three friends that are girls that I'd never date. Not because they arent physically attractive, but their views on relationships are really unattractive to me. As friends we can talk and laugh about whatever but we just wouldn't mix romantically. That being said, I have female friends like this are really hard to find.
Of course, they are student and young people who work/study/hang out together, so the pattern is what you described But childhood friends, neighbors, friends of the family, etc. are very different things. For example I often see the wife of my best friend and there's like nothing, or the sister of another friend. Same for childhood friends or friends who are like 10-30 years older than me.
@Ironstar I'm sure some do turn into simps. Some will start working out, and eating right. Some will also go into a field that makes them lots of money. Some guys who are rejected just go on like that, and think nothing good is going to happen or become doormats. Other guys use it as fuel to change their lot in life. It just depends on the guy.
I wouldn't say it's complicated. Cavemen want to bang everything and will do anything they get a sniff of. That's desperate men with no respect for women. I have plenty of friends who are women. Not once would I ever get with them, even if they said "please do me". They ain't gross or fat, they're good looking but I just see them as a friend, like I do with men. I wouldn't bang them. Again, it's a lack of respect for the other gender, that you'd want to get with them and not respect your friendship. To me, that sounds predatory to a point because you're waiting by for that moment of weakness in a woman, who confides something or has something bad happen and if they come on to you, you'd do them but if a guy does it, would you do them as well?! Of course not. Honestly, this is very simple and any man who wants to bang their "friends", are just sick and need to go cry in their basements.
Yes, we can be just friends. But status of relationship can always change :-) it what women mean by yes, and men mean by no. But they mean the same thing.
@@mbloom2275 Honestly, and this isn't going to sound good, it's because I know what a man's intention is for befriending a woman most of the time. And in today's world of instant gratification, it realistically only takes one moderate slip up for one of her guy friends to get his wish. And that goes for men too. We (human beings in general) have gotten so used to instant gratification, that all it takes for your significant other to step out and cheat is an argument or a fit of jealousy or whatever. I understand that there are people out there who would never think to do something like that to their significant other, but the reality is that those individuals are very few and far between, and they're only getting more and more rare as we get more and more used to the idea of instant gratification. I just personally wouldn't take the risk.
See this is a good example. If ur bi does that mean you have no friends? I hope u were being sarcastic. But I really think even if it’s one sided and one person likes the other as long as u act the part u can get all the benefits of a real friendship regardless. Just because 2 people that could fuck vs 2 people that wouldn’t have different kinds of friend ship doesn’t make it invalid. I have guy friends I know wud with me but we dont.. ever. And I call that a friendship. Like sorry if other people don’t but they make it wayyy too complicated with the would you’d? And ifs and buts. Like srsly
@@emilytustin4540 Exactly. Although I think being bi just gives you a different perspective. I'm bi and I can be completely platonically friends with men and women. With my friends who are straight guys, it's more likely they'll have a little bit of a thing for me (I'm a woman). But my bi friends? hasn't been a problem. I think heterosexuality just makes it harder for people to get over that already existing barrier between the sexes. It's like they have a bit of a fetishization of the entire gender, since it's the only one they're attracted to. For me, nobody gets special points just for being a man or woman so I don't have an expectation of something more.
I guess adding a "/s" to the end of that comment would make a difference. Otherwise, if meant that way, quite both some interesting advice like it is fuel for misogyny...
On very rare cases it's possible, and I say this as a man who had a genuine platonic female friend. Just the one though, of the many other friends whom I would have hooked up or entered into a relationship with, given the chance. I think the prerequisite to this one was that neither of us was LOOKING to get to know each other, mutual circumstances just threw us together and we ended up liking each other's company well enough to be friends, but didn't find each other attractive physically. She went after other people romantically and I did the same and our friendship remains, to this day, entirely platonic, and while I can only speak for myself in saying that I never developed romantic attraction to her, I'm fairly confident that there was never a point where she had that for me as well. But that's just it. It needs to happen without either side initiating it. Consider that most male-to-female interactions are initiated by men. And when a guy does try to get to know a girl, in almost every case it's going to be because he found her attractive in some way and wants to pave the way to shooting his shot. A guy who approaches a girl aiming for just friendship would be an anomaly. So yeah, girls, when you have a male best friend, think back to your very first interaction, if you can even remember it. Did he approach you? How did he do it, back when he didn't know who he was? Ask yourself what intentions could have guided his actions at the time. And if you truly believe that he was looking for a platonic friendship... well either you are lying to yourself, or you found a rare unicorn.
no women said: yes we can be *JUST* friends but also have feelings. But we'd still be *just* friends... because if i have no feelings then we are just friends regardless of what other person feels..
Labos222 good thing about generalizations is that its automatically indicates there's outliers... if the vast majority of men said no and vast majority of girls said yes then theres no real need to show anomalies, because theyre anomalies
+Red. You dont get it. If 90% of Women said "no", but I only showed the 10% of them that said "yes", just making sure I asked enough people so that the 10% would be enough for the whole video. I wouldnt be showing reality, but a manipulated one. You talking about "anomalies" ironically broadcasts that you most likely fall for such manipulations. Example: If I have an interview with cameras filming both you and me. During the interview I ask you several questions, but two of them are with alternative motives. One very negative, that you obviously say no to and a very easy and none controversial one that you obviously say yes to. Now, in editing, I show the introduction and back and forth between my and your face, but when I ask my controversial question. I show the footage of your face watching me ask that question, but when "you" respond I show my own face watching you. However your real response is muted and i have added in the "yes" instead. Making it seem like you were for the very controversial thing and removing peoples ability to see that your lips are not in sync with what you are actually saying because of a simple editing trick. Tricks like this are easy to spot for people that know what to look for. Others are less obvious, but you would most likely be fooled by the above... In short, your assessment isnt a wise one.
you can be friends with your spouse. in any other scenerio the guy either wants to be more than friends or they are actually an aquaintance you are calling a friend, but you are not that close
The redhead dude with sideburns is really good-looking guy and I agree with all of them actually. Friendship between men and women doesn't exist, because there is always a risk of deeper emotional and physical bond between them, that let's say frankly, is postponed.
There's always a chance of a deeper emotional bond between people, no matter their gender. That's life. Might as well not be friends with anyone if you don't want to risk anything.
Pato Niilista But isn’t the whole purpose of people thinking men and women can’t be friends cause one or the other might catch feelings? That’s the same case for people of the same sex who are into both genders... otherwise, it just sounds like you’re saying guys and girls can’t be friends only cause their parts don’t match.
I like how the women say yes quickly without thinking about it but once you start talking to them about it they realize they can’t. Guys were already thinking about the question and said no. Then I like how he told the girl it’s one sided friendship. This is a great video
@ChrisJones-ek2gm lmao 🤣 yet 99% of the top 1% is still males. Women only get into that club by getting divorced most of the time. The innovation field is still dominated by males. The infrastructure field is still dominated by males. Only high paying field females dominate is onlyfans which basically is objectifying themselves for male entertainment 🤦
no subscribe it's cuckery my boi . Subtle but cuckery none the less. You leave that shit and wait for her to come to her senses or split nonetheless from a dry pointless relationship lmao
no subscribe yah its sort of a forced friendship where the girl is friendly in the sense that she doesnt wanna step on your feelings or maybe, maybe the guy is so ambiguous with his feelings that thr girl litterally just thinks its just a friend thing. Eitherway the dudes suffering
it's usually the girl who dosint want to hurt his feelings- because the guy in question seems sensitive thus ending any further REAL relationship with awkwardness.. a girl will usually give a guy a chance but if he's just playing the nice guy you can forget a woman coming to you for protection and support.. mr sensitive dosint get laid he's just one of the girls to her lol.
The fuck you all on about you can be friends with a woman and not want something from her like what, are you stupid nice guys that want something back or something?
It's not about being entitled to anything. It's not about being rejected, If she has nothing to benefit me for my time, We are both wasting our time. Guys have similar interests thus females and men tend to share fewer similarities as of the natural cycle of our lives.. if you're fine being "that" guy who only hangs out with girls or is feeding a girls ego but cucking himself feel free. Men know what they are there for, boys like to play with everyone.
I’m not convinced…and it’s not only men that have ‘secret’ feelings or desires…I struggled when some friends of a girl I enjoyed being around told me they hated me because I obviously knew that she was kinda ‘crazy’ about me (very fond of me) and they believed I was toying with her…I didn’t have a clue..! 😇
@@MaxIronsThird That's just egotists. They don't value the friendship. If you value the friendship, you respect the other gender and you have respect for that person. It's clear that most men in the comments are absolutely desperate/thirsty for some puss and can't get any but would become a human chair in a second for some fat chick. Men and women can easily be friends but it's quite clear, some men are so desperate, they will sit around waiting for the women to become vulnerable, so they can get them drunk for a quicky.. which to me, is extremely sick. If you wouldn't bang your male friends, you wouldn't bang your female friends. Simple.
I'll probably get in trouble for saying this... But if you think of men as a superstore (that NEEDS to sell its goods) and women as custome- I am sorry for my sins, I will not post another RU-vid Comment for 3 days as my punishment.
Nothing wrong with being physically attracted to the opposite gender! That’s natural and normal but that doesn’t stop us from going beyond those feelings and being able to be someone’s friend and caring for them! To think differently would be shallow! Maybe those guys opinions about women will change as they grow older and mature! There is great benefit to guys and gals being just friends with each other! Friendship is beautiful!
@@charmingmagican9821 ikr, the vid got recommended to me and i had to wade through so many comments to get here. attraction isnt mutually exclusive from friendship, the fact that all these men are acting like we're brutes who cant move past attraction and inevitably always default to trying to fuck everything with holes just makes me sad. its the exact rhetoric that manhaters use to describe men, sex fiends unable to move past constant urges.
@@pianoandguitarlover2773 what?? Yeah in a few cases but most men are rapists aka most rapists are men, that means your claims are coming from your head and not observations from of the world. Grow up child women are often calm headed and execute anger when they find it necessary, men well aggression is their daily language according to what most men claim. In simple words, your point is incorrect.
@@whyareyouexisting7285 Funny how a little girl with a cartoon moniker suggests that someone else is immature and should grow up. You project quite well.
@@whyareyouexisting7285 Is that the only response you're capable of? What??? As if adding extra question marks somehow makes your dumb ass more important? It doesn't. Saying most men are rapists shows what a POS you truly are.... especially when statistics prove you both wrong and ignorant.
When ppl marry they drop their friends of the opposite sex. The women's male friends were always just orbiters being used by her hoping it's lead to him fucking her and the man WAS the orbiter to his female friends.
Male friends and female friends provide different types of friendship and that’s why you require both. You can only know that if you’ve had both male and female friends.
+ILoveMedia x22 The messiest person I know is a man. I've seen my male family members gossip. I've also seen guys pull the puppet strings and start drama with a group of girls. Most male drama traces back to guys and bruised egos. Most girl drama traces back to a guy.
+Jeremy Honeycutt Most girl drama is over a guy that two or more of the girls like. I've seen it happen before. I've seen men manipulate drama behind the scenes.
Men are better at throwing the rock and hiding their hand. Girls however are more obvious. Makes sense because women talk more on average. So they might express their feelings, while the guys are just sitting there and causing drama quietly.
I love how all the girls say they can be friends but the guys are like nahhh. This video is pretty much unnecessary for guys cause we already know the answer.
I wish your comment was more visible. It's unfortunately a lesson that boys don't learn until they're men and not all men learn it. I could have saved myself a lot of time and trouble growing up. I could have been finding the girls who actually wanted me instead of "attending" the girls I wanted but who did not want me in return.
Different culture different perception. In Japan I watched many j-dorama, j-tv movie, j-movie and j-horror and there are so many Japanese woman said that woman bestfriend are can't be trusted
This made me really sad when I was younger because I was genuinely interested in conversations and in having friendships with some of the guys I knew. But it became clear to me that they didn’t really see me as anything but meat. Having said that I think some men and woman can be friends to a certain point. Especially when they get a bit older and more mature.
Why? Why is it a negative to be platonic friends?? Why a moment of silence. Get off porn, stop masterbating its fucking with your minds. Has yall thinking about sex all the time. If you switched it an it was a guy saying "all my friends are girls" it wouldn't be ohh a moment of silence for the girls. A lot of women don't masterbate or watch porn and I honestly think that's why we are more clear headed and focused on other more important things.
@Alex You're absolutely right, it seems as though a lot of men today view sex as the only goal and friendship is something to be avoided. I genuinely can't fathom thinking that way, there is so much more to life and to individuals than whether or not you desire them.
@@eyexan6021 if you're a guy and all you have is female friends then there's a 100% chance you're gay. If you're a girl and you have both female and male friends, then I don't really care but I will keep an eye out for the guys that she calls "friends".
You mean people who consider people they have coffee with (in a group once every 3 months) to be "friends" in order to feel better about not having any real friends?
The best male friend (platonic friendship for almost 10 years) I had was so amazing... I married him! lmao We dated other people, traveled, and got to know ourselves and what we wanted in life with all the experiences as a single person in our twenties. Yes, it's a one-way friendship, if one person likes the other but we both liked each other. The key is to recognize a good thing but also only commit when you know you're ready. In my opinion.
@@brendanvanbiljon3861 did you see her face? The 'WTF as if" face. It must nice fighting off attention so much that you get pissed when someone is attracted to you.
@@SnerMerNer Nah man look at her face the whole interaction. 1. "Would you hook up?" - Her face turns stern in anticipation of the answer. 2. "Totally, look at her", and starts laughing - She roles her eyes thinking he's not serious and being sarcastic. 3. "Don't be sarcastic, I need the truth" - she holds her breath. 4. "Ok that's perfect, cut cut" - loudly exhale and body turns less tense. She's most probably in love with him, but doesn't think he's in love with her. She equates "hooking up" with love. That's why she actually roles her eyes; "whatever, he doesn't love me like I do him". She got tense because the interview for her was "would he love me" instead of "would he hookup with me". But yeah, I've overanalyze this shit. Good way to start my day.
@@brendanvanbiljon3861 They're just friends. That question jeopardized that which is why she was so tense. Also, 2:18 wasn't a sigh of relief, it was an awkward, forced laugh. It's optimistic to think cute girls secretly have feelings for you when you're just their friend. Trust me, if she were interested, she would have let him know way before they had an established friendship.
There needs to be level of maturity and respect for the person along with you genuinely valuing their company well enough that you decided to keep them around and remain friends even after accepting they'll will be no romantic nor sexual encounters, why ? because you see the person as more than just a potential love interest. Really how is this so hard to understand
we got no time for drama, here is the answer, alright next. when women try to explain something they take you on a god damn field trip, like just get to the point already.
It is doable, i don't say male nature is perfect (neither female nature) but men's possibilities and their nature are not well understood. Being able to live a relationship with a girl is one think but guys can be just friends too. + society does not give men the permission to be different because men wanted to be and act in such ways.
