10 Things No One Tells You About Childfree Life 

​@@happygirl__929well I'm an insect parent to wasps and aggressive bees

I'd rather take the risk of being bored with life than being permanently annoyed and overwhelmed.

@@TuliTheUnruly same! And bored with kids. Apart from annoying and overwhelming, I find them boring.

@@martuskarogowska Borrrrrriiiiinnnnnggg......AND a wicked time and money drain.

Yes!

We are also more well read and less prone to being brainwashed. We have less distractions so can give more thought and consideration to what we're being told.

I'm past 50 and love cranking up my music whenever I want!!!!!

ME TOO!

Nice I’m 33 single and no kids no plans for marriage, I can’t take total care of another human being all my life is so stressful

@@david7416 I've never regretted not having kids. I'm 57. I'm really happy. All that threat about " you'll regret not having kids" is just social control

🤣✌️

This should be obvious to anyone over 18 who is considering kids. You aren't having a baby. You are raising a human. It's as big a responsibility as you can get and it will be forever with no refunds. The fact so many don't seem to think beyond 'baby' truly astounds me.

They are separate people, that's for sure, and they have their own character right from the start. They are not autonomous, though. At six weeks old my youngest daughter is quite lively and active, but she is utterly dependent on us adults, let's face it. Even at 18 my oldest daughter still has way to go until she is financially independent, though she certainly does her own things and has her own opinions, even politically.

Ironically this is most evident if you are a kid

The fact you thought they were cute little toys is definitely why you shouldn't have children lmao

@@Hohum1945 Haha, yes, exactly! It's always amazing to me to hear people talk about this as if it's a revelation of some sort. Imagine listening to someone talk about how the older they get, the more they realize that the sun does, in fact, rise in the East. It boggles the mind to think that people are being raised in such a way that they don't understand that other people are people too! Also, kudos to @erikt1713 - there is no such thing as a completely autonomous human being in the first place, we are social animals that require regular interaction with others to survive. This does not mean that people are not individuals with their own wants, needs, etc., but it does mean that children cannot simply be left to figure out life on their own - they are going to want things that they should not have, think things about themselves that are not true, and need guidance. It would not surprise me that someone for whom the fact that children are human beings is a revelation would also struggle with the idea that children are not fully-formed adults.

So welcome. It needs to be said more!

I completely agree! ❤

I also needed to hear someone say this too!

You don't have to apologize or explain your choices. Besides, I'm a lousy cook!

I am pregnant now at 40. The reason I got pregnant only now, not only because I focused on my career, it's because it took me a long time to find a man who shared the same values and goals as me and was ready to take a relationship seriously enough to build a f amily together.

So, you’re going to die alone because you don’t want to get up before 11am on the weekend?

Yeah yeah you see envy in their eyes 🤣🤣🤣 wtf

😂😂😂

@@fluffybunny1200 meanwhile, MANY people that do have kids don’t even get visits from them while they are old and dying. if they don’t care then they don’t care.

@@fluffybunny1200 so you wanna have kids just so they can take care of you when you old? That’s very selfish.. imagine bringing to this world a life and face many hardships just so they can take care of you being old and guess what it may not happen because they won’t turn the way you always hoped and they may be sick or disabled and you both need care

We can support people that live life differently than we do. So many people seem to think we all have to live the same. 🤔

@@daviusdavis2537 A lot of people care that others are childfree (as soon as they find out), and they make comments about it. It is normal that no one on the street knows. What kind of argument is that?

I hate to break to everyone, but as an evolutionary biologist, I can confirm that the entire point of existence for all species is to survive long enough to breed.

I was child free AF until about 25, then I started itching for more meaning and a bigger challenge in life and I am now 28 with a one month old. I’d like to think I understand both perspectives

@@sarahrobertson634 evolutionary biologist blurghhh 🤮 you might as well sell snake oil. Denying social structures is the fakest science out there.

Life can be super full without kids! 👍

Yeah as 22 yo guy i feel like both my parents narcissists and i have to live with paranoia, anxiety, worry, sociophobia. I don't like this society but somehow i should integrate myself cause yeah without society you can't do much

It’s a recent phenomenon for women to say, “I’m a mom.” It’s all about them. Women used to just tell you the names and ages of their kids. It was “Yes, I have kids,” not “I’M a MOM.”

I agree, children are not a necessity for a full life. But lots of parents just do the best they can. There’s no manual or perfect parent. Some do unintentionally mess their kid up in some sort of way.

Narcissists? Coming from a woman who doesnt want kids🤣, most parents would die for their kids, not very narcissistic.

Well put.

Bingo. I'm sitting here on my recliner relaxing with my dogs in a cold day, having the time of my life 100% stress free and happy with the little things.

Agree 100%😊👍🏻

Agree 100%

Love this❤

I am pregnant now at 40. The reason I got pregnant only now, not only because I focused on my career, it's because it took me a long time to find a man who shared the same values and goals as me and was ready to take a relationship seriously enough to build a f amily together.

@@MrJo2864did u freezes your egg?

Same, i'm 56 - Child Free

U look super young in your pic

​@JannatHerzallah It is about 5 years old now🤭 probably time to update Thank you. Alot of people tell me that and when they find out I am childfree they say something like people without kids always look younger.

I know several ppl like that. mostly men, but no one will admit it. sad, really. I feel like I'm not put here do procreate, but just try and make a difference in someone else's life.

@D Riley I've met enough people who admit, that they wouldn't have children if they could go back in time, especially women

I know also a lot of childless REALLY but really depress stressed with almost mental problem people. I swear! They call me a lot and speak about they problems. Im mother and im tired about this unhappy single people who want always some problems

I have fun when i play with my kids, alot of fun! It wasnt like that before them, my life was borring

This is subjective, everyone doesn’t have the same experiences

Thank you for your honesty. This is what most of my friends with small kids have told me as well.

It doesn't last forever. Soon they become teenagers and adults

Thanks for including kids on vacations. Lots of friends travel without their kids but they're human too and those travels are great learning experiences. Even if they're little monsters the memories will last forever

@@JJmikra yeah and when they're finally adults, you yourself are old and had zero time for yourself

Amen lol

So true!

I have a mortgage that's enough ball and chain for me.

Right. People expect people to be doing something every second of the day. Or your life is not fulfilled. We don’t need to fill every moment of our day with something. It’s okay to be boring, and have a boring, peaceful life.

Thank you for this! I’ve been feeling the pressure and wanted to hear from someone a little older than me

@@cattc6946 don't do it! Stick to your gut, and don't live your life based on what others want you to be! I was always against having kids and my girlfriend, who is older, wanted to. Now she thanks me because after seeing how miserable her sister and cousin are, she realized she really did not care to deal with all of that.

There might be a tiny amount of mothers who regret they have kids (hard to fathom though as a mother), and your informal interviews are hardly a representative sample of the population of mothers.

@Klari, the interviews are not informal. I don’t go up to ANY women with children and ask them if the regret their choice to be a mom. I’ve met women throughout my life in different states with different backgrounds, that all were curious why I chose to not be a mother and after talking to me they would confess that if they could take it back they wish they made the same choice. It doesn’t mean they hate their children, they just don’t like being mothers. I will say they ALL felt pressured to have children, whether by family, friends or society. And that’s the truth. It’s a proven fact that not all women have maternal instincts. And I believe that because I’ve heard many stories from friends and even within my own family of the mothers not being affectionate EVER and the child being ignored more often than not. I meet a lot of people raised by emotionally unavailable mothers. I would say that was a very clear indication that those moms never wanted to be moms and the child they have and raise suffer because of it.

@@beckyaquino5007 also, just because she can't fathom mothers regretting their kids does not mean all mothers feel like her. There are literally parents out there who kill their own kids and then there are still people like this lady living in a fantasy world

Our choice to not have kids isn't a judgement on parents who chose to have them. Having kids is optional and we have just decided it's not for us.

Exactly

This makes me feel better that parents actually do support their children with this decision. My mom has always supported my decision and sometimes I question whether or not she's telling me the truth. she says that she wants us to be happy, and if kids aren't in the cards, than it is what it is

@@driley5004 She is telling you the truth. You have a supportive mom and that's so beautiful.

​@@Godisfirst21truth is key word , don't make them doubt theirselves

Where can we date such a gem?

Honestly it is tragic she will miss out on babies...try to make her think again.

😂 wow

They think they do . They don't

They want you to suffer as they did .

Were these people going to give free babysitting?!

@@jackilynpyzocha662 lol, Sure!

All Is true until one of you get sick and pass.. The other one have to live alone and this is the hard truth.. Life is real when uou are alone in your death bed dependent on someone unknown stranger changing diapers.. It is not about the small pleasures which we may have to forgo..we are after all social beings.. Lets be honest

@@lakshganesh4776 It depends on the networks you cultivate while you have the chance. It is perfectly possible for someone without their own kids to surround themselves with people who care about them. They have to work at it, but a parent has to work just as hard to ensure their kids care enough to fulfill that end-of-life care role.

Yes, there's such an assumption that all childfree people don't like kids. Some don't and they are allowed to feel that way, but some of us still like having kids in our lives.

That's because, like any other movements, the extremists take over. For example, the childfree Reddit has been taken over by child haters. Similar to how the feminism was taken over by men haters, the men's rights movement had been taken over by incels, MeToo, religion, the republican party, etc. It sucks that we can't have nice things any more without extremists taking over.

EXACTLY!! I am a teacher, an aunt, a tutor, a babysitter; and I LOVE children to pieces!!! But I have known since I was 18 that I did not want to bring a child of my own into this world. 💯

Same here. I can change a nappy blindfolded and get a crying baby off to sleep in 3 minutes. I actually like babies. What I dont like is the drudgery and entrapment of full time responsibility.

Yeaah! When I was in my 20’s I worked with kids as a dance teacher. That was a lot of fun, I would even repeat. But I don’t want to babysit them or spend 24 hours with them. Im actually not really interested in them. But I don’t wish them anything bad and I don’t hate them. Not my vibe 😅

Love it! There are so many amazing aspects of being childfree. I wanted to focus a little bit more on some of the challenges that we have experienced in this particular video. 😃

What's boom-boom?

@@Sunset4633 find yourself a romantic partner and they'll explain it better than I can (physically)

@@keyhimself3542 Over my dead body :-D

@@keyhimself3542 No. I don't think I will 😜

I’m glad to hear that you haven’t had a difficult time making childfree friends. That’s a good place to be. 😃 Unfortunately a lot of childfree people really struggle with finding other CF friendships.

Lucky you. I hope to find some in real life but I'm the meantime I will find some online, lol

I think it's highly dépendent on where you live. In big "leftwing" cities, you dont have difficulties in having child free Friends (speaking from European point of vue here)

There are very few childfree people in rural Minnesota where I live. I know two. The rest of my acquaintances have children. I'm really ok with that. I'm one who enjoys spending some time with school-aged kids.

So with other statements you agree. Great.

yea I've always found that honestly psychotic ah you should have a kid so you won't be bored and lonely when you get older uhhhh you mean get a dog or a cat ....... because that's the same logic buddy

Forcing others to have kids is the normal thing in my country an Asian country. It is very Bad here to survive as a Childfree person.

There are a lot of reasons. The thing is, many cultures and society place more value on the group than the individual. So not contributing to the group by having children is frowned upon. Try to remember, every time you talk about how raising kids being entirely optional is some sort of fact of the universe, you are essentially saying that many cultures around the world are inferior to yours in at least one way.

That's a lot of people! 😦

Childless 🙌

I’m looking seriously for a childless man for something beautiful together ❤

Exactly. Add onto that the amount of children stuck in foster care.

That's a nonsense point. They aren't dying from hunger because there isn't enough food to feed them, they're dying because of poor governance and lack of access to resources. You really think fewer people died from hunger when the population was half what it is now?

That's fantastic.

Thank you for sharing. 🙂

@@daviusdavis2537 then this channel is not for you sir

Yeah as 22 yo guy i said 2 times to my father that they need to go therapy maybe? And ofc he don't get he thinks he did things right because noone told him nah its sucks idea Mihail stop it. And now i have to live with paranoia, worry, anxiety, sociophobia, depression

@@godofdeath8785 i am so sorry for you i hope you get better

I need more therapy because I have kids!!

OMG! I love you! I so agree with you that it’s actually a selfish thing to have kids. As a child I recognised that the world was over populated and people should adopt more, rather than bring another mouth to feed into the world. Still hold to that belief today. And the “who will look after you when you’re old” comment really pisses me off. Your children are not your slaves/property. If they are so inclined to help look after you, great! But don’t expect it, and certainly don’t have kids for that reason, which, sadly, some do.

One could easily do the same thing in reverse, or do you tell people with a straight face that your NOT having children somehow betters humanity? These ideas about overpopulation are absolutely laughable, and debunked by even a cursory glance at global demographic data - all countries are experiencing declining birthrates, and most are heading for demographic collapse in the next century or two. People give those surface level responses because they are not typically expecting or prepared to have a complex understanding and justification for something so basic. But the parts about bettering of humanity are embedded right there in what they say. If you took the time to guide them and drill down to their core reasoning, I'm sure you would more often than not find the kinds of answers you're looking for. As an example, have a long conversation with them about why they feel motivated to pass on their teachings and legacy. I bet the answers will ultimately involve feeling that their culture and values make the world a better place, and so should be propagated. Nothing selfish about that. The "who will look after you when you're old," comments are not about your children being obligated to look after you, they are about *someone's* children being required to look after you. You don't need to have your own children, but SOMEONE has to have children in order for you to be taken care of. If it's not going to be you, then it's pretty rich of you to deride others as being selfish for producing the children YOU will depend on as you age. Having children is not just necessary for the betterment of humanity, it's *required* for humanity to even exist in the first place! If you want to be all edgy and talk about how the world would be better off without humans, then by all means, go back to Hot Topic, but just remember: You clearly don't strongly believe the world is better off without you or those around you, or you would do something about it. But somehow it's okay to say that it would be better off without *other* people, as long as you don't know them? Why do the lives you know have more value than the ones you don't?

I loved the little outdoor cafes in Paris! So nice to just sit and people watch while leisurely enjoying a drink.

Indeed yes ,like holidays with screaming annoying children and cluttered house are too funny and we missed it 😂😂😂😂

Yeah smart human always find to do something interesting

Misery loves company

Jesuss, i thought it only happened with women

I'm 59.... I never changed my mind. I proved them all wrong.

It feels like social gaslighting. Because it IS.

​​@@SUGAR_XYLERyou are still here and may be wait few more years it will strike you

That's too early to think about kids.. Insane.. May have experienced childhood abuse

Yes I have this concept in my mind. But feeling very Tough to implement in Life.

I'm 46bkids married never around . I still use the school calendar. Even before kids . I'd buy clothes at back to school time .lol . What did school do to us

Online childfree communities are amazing, even though I know it's not the same thing as in-person friends.

Thank you👍🏼🌱

@@sunnylight5753 We're out here, we just don't make a lot of noise for the afore mentioned reasons. Thanks Hannah!

What does being Latin have to do with anything?

Latin culture has a way of making women slaves or martyrs to kids. It’s a co dependent narcissistic and egotistical existence that they enable. If u don’t have kids and are an independent woman, it’s like you are an alien. 😂

Gross!

❤

There are things you have to experience directly to truly understand them

Some people don't have the capacity to appreciate the development of another human being. I agree that many people leery of having kids would find that they are actually great parents who appreciate how fulfilling it can be. But I also agree that there are many people who for whom it would be better to not be a parent.

Agreed! Series went downhill as soon as Bernadette had the baby. (It was iffy when she announced she was pregnant, but her fears and doubts and uncertainty about being a good mother because she wasn't happy and excited about the news were realistic) but when she went Baby crazy, her whole character was ruined. The rest of the characters seemed to have suffered as well.

Thank you. Yes, especially when Penny didn't ever want kids!

They did that just to please people unfortunately...

@@blackcat8104 well look Prime Big Bang Theory Prime of the show seasons 1-6 decline but still okish seasons 7-10 OMFG WOULD YOU END ALREADY seasons 11-12

It sure is! 🙌

I think it’s one of the most common assumptions. If you don’t have kids it’s because you hate them. 🤔🚫

As a mother of two wonderful girls, I do not see you as defective. What I see is a minority group projecting negativity on a group that had different life choices. Go on not having kids, it is really OK, up to a point. However, if the majority decided to not have kids, in order to sleep in at the weekend and have kid-free holidays, then all societies would collapse in 30-40 years. Just think and be grateful that we decided not to sleep in for 8-9 years.

That's great that you were able to get sterilized at a young age. I know a lot of people have trouble finding a Dr that will do it if you're in your 20's. Glad to see some Dr's are doing what their patients request.

Hold up, I need to know this doctor asap. I'm 23 and would love to be sterilized. If it isn't too much to ask, did you get tubes tied or seared closed?

@@Mehhhhhhhh No, if anything, full removal of the tubes can potentially reduce the risk of certain cancers.

@@Mehhhhhhhh what are you talking about?? I’ve had removed, a bilateral salpingectomy, and it can reduce ovarian cancer by up to 50%. Dr Judith Fleming was my surgeon. It was the best day of mu life. 😃

@@veroniquecastel9582 i would like to get snipped too

Right?! It didn't even fit her character at all.

@@WifeWithoutKids They made her childfree for 12 seasons. Her being childfree was even a big part of season 12 plot. But in the end they had to make her have a baby and did not even give actual reasons for it 😥

I'm so glad you are open to letting your kids make their own choice without pressuring them. My Mom was the same way and it was very much appreciated.

If you read the comments above, I do not see compassion toward the people deciding to keep up the survival of humanity on the planet. I saw the adjectives narcissitic, and selfish (how when we are the ones getting up to our "annoying" kids)It might be hard to fathom but the children of today will be the adults of tomorrow, who will build this world, heal the sick, clean the steets, uphold the law, out of their tax your street will be lit, water purified and so on. So without us, narcissists, you childfree people will not survive in your old age.

Yes, there is the whole "not passing down the trauma" thing. The buck stops here. ;-)

It'll change as you age. Men with kids come back to "the market" and they don't need more kids but a woman to spend life with. Kids grow fast after all

If I were you I'd borrow one of my friends kids or kids from family and then say that's my kid. It's no use getting personal when speaking with a doctor plus you don't owe them anything they should just focus on their job.

Hey, thanks! Glad you enjoyed the video.

Just being you is enough of an accomplishment. 😃

Nice! Enjoy your day. 😀

Do people now say to you that you'll be sad you'll never experience what it's like to be a Grandma?

@@WifeWithoutKids yes they do, but having many friends who are grandmothers and seeing their experiences, I have absolutely no regrets. One of the questions I get asked is if you don't have children who are you going to leave your stuff to when you die. Really? Is that the purpose of my life? Then the suggestion I leave my stuff to thier kids as I don't have any. Hell no. What I don't spend or use myself will go to the local lost dogs home or wildlife rescue. My choice to not have children does not mean to fulfil my purpose on this planet I must provide for somebody's children. I wonder if this would be a conversation if I was male? Having worked as a nurse I lost count of the number of times inheritance was discussed among children and with parents well before death was imminent. I think a good question to answer before having children is why do you want to have children? The answer to this should determine whether you should have children.

We've got to enjoy it while it lasts.

for me it's like i see the direction the Planet is heading and it's simply not reversible i don't want them to have to live in that future see it will be hard enough for me as barring bad luck i still got over 50 years to go taking me into the 2070s if not 2080s but if i have kids they will probably make it into the 2100s i can't even imagine how bad S*** will be in 10 years never mind 76 years

If you don’t like to have kids by all means don’t and all the more power to you. But if the main reasoning is that the planet is dying from overpopulation, please invest some time doing some serious research and you’ll see birth rates are collapsing in every developed country, so reality is quite the opposite. Be free, make your choices independently but be careful not to fall victim of fallacious and captivating narratives for important decisions in your life.

If you actually believe that, I encourage you to take even a cursory glance at basic demographic data. Essentially every country on Earth is experiencing negative birthrates that will lead to population collapse in the next century or two, or earlier in many cases. Overpopulation is not a problem our children or their children's children will have to deal with.

You might find these interesting. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-jx00cmvZvV4.html

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-kzALCz9AUXE.html

Those kids you have might put you in a nursing home and never visit.

Stop pushing your breeder narrative on everybody!!! I'm a 55 year old single and childfree Black woman and I'm not in the least bit lonely or regretful about my PERSONAL choices to be single and childfree!!! My life is my own and I don't owe anybody an explanation either!!!

@@wyleecoyotee4252 More common than one thinks.