I’ve struggled with bdd my whole life and I feel that exact same way about people. That they are out to get me or they’re judging me in some way. It’s at a point now where I can’t leave the house. It’s definitely hard to accept the possibility that not everyone is like that especially when you’ve had bad experiences but watching your videos makes me feel less alone. I wish you well
It's especially hard to recall something when the people in your life told you to stop being so sensitive, or denied it was even happening to you. It's really shitty when youre trying to do the work but every memory is so hazy, or numb.
You are clearly on the right path now, the positive is slowly replacing the negative. The thing is that the internet and the real world are worlds apart. Many think that watching a video about a situation equals living that same situation, changing their perspective about the real world.
you look so good.....your starting to see what we all saw from the start. Your skin and overall health looks so much better now.....incredible. Just tell your story so others can know that they are not alone
I can totally relate. Back in high school, my acne was so severe that I felt completely unnoticed by girls. However, things changed after I graduated, and my skin cleared up. Suddenly, women started paying attention to me. It was what I had wanted during my high school years. But deep down, I couldn't help but wonder how they would have treated me if my skin hadn't improved.
Well, they probably would've treated you like people did in high school. Just enjoy the positive attention now. It's a blessing from the gods. Not everyone's looks improve after high school
I'm kinda feeling similar to this. All my teenage years I've been distancing myself from everyone cause I though they all think I'm ugly and stupid and all that stuff but at the same time everyone treated me normally and i couldn't understand why anyone would like me. Now I'm getting out of that mindset and im starting to realise that I never deserved to treat myself as if im a monster. My teenage years are almost over but I'm just happy I don't feel this crap anymore. Although many people have hurt me, there are also kind people that love you if you let yourself meet them and honestly in the end screw the people that just like to bring others down they're actually so pathetic
Im feelin ready to check out maybe ill giv it a year but im honestly feelin done. I do want to say this...your one of the only reasons ive been fighting to keep going because you are dealing with the same sh1t i deal with and hav the guts to share so thank you for giving me strength. I want to make it clear i think your an awsome person of good quality....broken yes like all of us but Beautifully broken just keep going i fully believe you'll reach great places mentally and physically. All great things take time srry for the rant its 2am im crying and tired 😅
Bullying is bad, VERY BAD for the effect it can have on people...but I feel like your past is slowly losing the power it has on your present because you are working on reducing that power. I love that for you hun. Lots of love your way babe ♥
I don't think you will ever truly forget your past experiences. Even if you cant 'feel' them anymore, you won't forget what happened. Don't be afraid to let go of those feelings now that you're in a better situation. Allow yourself to experience a more comfortable way of being ❤️
It's always nice to get an upload from you. It seems to me that you're starting to feel a little better within yourself and I applaud you for that. Here's to always wishing you well. 😊❤🙏
I’m a 45 year old woman who has bdd, autism and also recovered from an ed in my 20’s and 30’s. People actually called me ugly when I was younger. I have a big nose, blotchy skin, my face is asymmetric. I realize now that I am a normal looking woman and that most of the bullying was from my withdrawn personality and my autism. Yeah I’m not the best looking woman, but I’m also really weird socially and people are awful dumb apes who will bully a person for anything they don’t understand.
Yo going out with friends a lot more than before dude that’s great I’m happy for you I hope you keep getting showered with more of that good luck be well and make sure to start taking good care of yourself now you here and good luck with everything
I have the same problem where I have bad generalized assumptions about people. I know it’s supposed to be wrong to think these things about everyone in that way, but it also feels untrue for me to let go of those assumptions because from what I’ve seen my whole life those things are pretty much true. I just gotta think to myself “maybe I’m just unlucky and ran into every bad person?” And that’s as best as convincing myself is gonna get
U will never be able to forget the way people treated you, that is part of who you are now. Good thing is you re not only recovering from the bad stuff but you re glowing, and i m not just saying that to make you feel better. One of your videos was recommended to me and i just clicked on it because of " who s this hot girl" make of that what you want😂. Clicked cuz im a gorilla stayed because of the content
You’ve come along ways. I’m glad to see your smiling😊 you have a very attractive smile. You’re more at peace. I’ll keep you in my prayers Jesus loves you❤
I know what you're going through but I do the opposite, I remember the events specifically and very deeply and I wallow in them. It does make me feel bad, when you're always thinking of the past a part of your present stays there. One needs a balance.
It's why I told you to find your own thing. "The warrior finds the love in what they do". Old ancient saying I learned in the army. I understand it now. Work on yourself. Your soul is yours alone. So find yourself hun. People can't do it for you. Don't look to them
You look like a different person. And you talk like a different person. You’re conventionally attractive now. You had your glow up. You are solidly above average. No need to feel weird about it. And yes people will generally treat you better now because you look better. That’s life. No matter how attractive you become on the outside you have to fix the inside to truly start living. It seems you realize this and are working on it though.
VIDEO RECOMMENDATIONS: (If You're into true crime) I would suggest either watching the insane case on matthew falder and record yourself giving your thoughts on it--- or record yourself reacting to a video on him! My second suggestion is to do a video where you're talking about your favorite books, movies, or funny moments in Your life! The books and movies could be a top 5 or 10 list video! My last suggestion is make a video where you're talking about the places you've always wanted to travel to, and why! Indonesia has always been mine! :D
Hi, Could you please do a video on your experience going back to work with this disorder? What steps did you take to be able to do so? Any advice would be wonderful 🙂 Thankyou for your videos.
its nice to see another doing better with this "disorder". Ive managed to find a girlfriend of almost a year regardless of my self loathing and everything else that comes with it. its long distance but its still something that someone wants to look at me.
Your really pretty like im not saying this being petty in any way ur REALLY PRETTY you could easily be a model.everyone saying ur normal well yh bc ur not wearing much makeup if u tryed ud get really attractive if u want.u should do a video like getting a makeover
I find it interesting that you started hating the people who bullied you, since I was also bullied but my feelings took a different direction. I was bullied for being fat-I was roughly 171 cm tall and weighed 72 kg. Over the span of a year, through skipping meals, I dropped to 57.8 kg and grew to 175 cm tall. Yet, my feelings of hatred manifested inwardly. I became focused on myself and constantly felt that I wasn't good enough. I felt the need to be fit and muscular like other guys and to have a clean, flawless face like many women appear to have. More importantly, I also started disliking other people who were on the chubbier or overweight side. Maybe it's because I feel like by doing this I'm distancing myself from anything that might remind me of the pain I once went through, or maybe it's a coping mechanism to avoid anything that recalls my past and makes me associated with it. But yeah, just found it interesting how our feelings towards the people who wronged us can differ and wanted to rant a bit.
I know exactly what you are going through my mental health and self esteem is shot too I am disabled cp and Adhd and I have been scolded harshly my entire life so now I am battling victim mentality and I definitely don't respond well to criticism
You're looking so much healthier, kiddo. Even your voice sounds so much more confident and lively. I don't know why you're afraid of forgetting how you felt when you have all these videos to look back on. Old stuff will keep bubbling up to the surface as you heal. I think of it like when you move house and you find all those old things you'd forgotten about that trigger lost memories. It's a good sign even if it might feel like your old self trying to claw its way back in and sabotage you. Be calm and ride it out. 💗
Hey i hope you doing alright i wanna ask you a question and i need your reply please.. I'm trying to fix my teeths and it needs braces how to find the right place and if you can't afford it what's the plan.. Help me i have been dealing with depression and insecurities my whole life because of my teeths..
If you have insurance, I would look up different orthodontic clinics near you and ask if they take any. But most likely you’ll have to pay out of pocket for braces. Mine were 6k with monthly payments. Orthodontists will work with you.
@@CrookedLady i won't be able to pay 6k at all and my teeths are really messed up it will cost over that.. But I'll try my best to fix them i just have bit of fear how would it be and how long it will takes.. I have lived 12 years struggling with the way my teeths looks like. Thank you for trying to help me
Come unto me, all ye that Labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
i think two opposing ideas can exist at the same time, people are a lot of times just shitty humans but also there are many good ones and it just depends which ones you're closer too at the time. just because you are around nicer people who challenge your opinions and beliefs it doesn't mean your old views of the world were incorrect or misinterpreted. those bullies you were around still exist and there will likely be more in the future you will have to deal with BUT! you will be better armed and can detect them much sooner and stay away from them. There will also be good, loving, caring, empathetic humans to meet too along the way. Some of your friends might've just been luckier than you and simply didn't encounter the Goblins you worked with
There are some bad people in the world, but you will KNOW them by their actions- not words. A bad tree cannot produce good fruit, and a good tree cannot produce bad fruit.
Back when you and I first met on reddit, we got off on the wrong foot. I wished we could have reconciled. I have my regrets there, but you have been doing well on your journey and I believe you continue to grow each day. Getting to know people isn't perfect. Some are better able to be more aware and attentive of others, but it's a part of growing and learning.
Not sure if primary function of most people is to hurt each others, for some it might be. Evolution has programmed us to tolerate each other and work together to achieve common goals.
The crooked lady: (titles her video) I really don’t know anything Me: well you tend to call yourself unattractive when your actually really pretty so perhaps that is true perhaps you really don’t know anything p.s. yall I just got the world record push-ups for most push-ups in less than a single minute today so I’m pretty f#####g pumped/hyped
Since you asked for video recommendations I will recommend any video from a guy named "Sadhguru" he is a wise man from india with really good advice for life, he even has books.
It seems like success in life is having a good set of copes. I used to laugh at people with copes. I thought they were foolish for not seeing the world as it is. Perhaps ignorance is bliss. Maybe I'm the one with the copes and the rest of the world is normal. Who knows?
The crooked lady: anyone would do whatever for sex or whatever to get with someone Me: yeah your definitely generalizing… I can’t speak for everyone but for me personally would I do anything/whatever for sex? No personally speaking I don’t like the idea of having sex with someone that I haven’t been in a relationship with for a few years so there’s that Would I do anything to get with someone I mean yeah but no me personally it depends on what it is and who it is so while you may be right on the side of the coin it may be a yes but just not inherently speaking
I think people saw you as an easy target. Not because you're uglee. But because they knew how bad it would hurt mentally. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise
You look normal, not gorgeous or sexy but normal and cute, try and move on my dear I genuinely think it's your mental perception of yourself and personality that holds you back, unless this is mainly to feed some needy for attention, if not then I wish you the best.
People are homo sapiens primates. You can condition an animal to act nice, but in the end, it's still an animal. That's what people can't accept about themselves. You're obviously smarter than the average person and you've had the experience to back up your views about people. Don't let a couple of nice gestures cause you to betray your experience and the facts of life. People do what they were taught to do, or what their instincts propel them to do. One's value in society lies in what they have to offer. So the world is in fact shallow. I relate to your thoughts in this video 100%. That's why I can advise you like that.
My eyes are open to lookism. I still fight it wherever I can. I believe genuine empathy and compassion can override our shallow nature, it just takes spreading ideas around.
@@CrookedLady But there is no such thing as "genuine" empathy. Empathy and compassion are taught, not inherent. This is how genocides were justified by millions of people. This is how children who grow up with terrorists can commit terrorism without second thought. This is how cannibalistic tribes exist.
@@CrookedLady But there is no such thing as "genuine" empathy. Empathy and compassion are taught, not inherent. This is how genocides were justified by millions of people. This is how children who grow up with terrorists can commit terrorism without second thought. This is how cannibalistic tribes exist.
@@CrookedLady But there is no such thing as "genuine" empathy. Empathy and compassion are taught, not inherent. This is how gen*cides were justified by millions of people. This is how children who grow up with terr*rists can commit terr*rism without second thought. This is how cannibalistic tribes exist.
